


The love we share

by Niaxi



Category: Digimon - All Media Types, Digimon Adventure, Digimon Adventure Zero Two | Digimon Adventure 02, Digimon Adventure tri.
Genre: F/M, taikari
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-05
Updated: 2020-05-19
Packaged: 2020-08-10 00:14:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 86
Words: 245,457
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20126179
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Niaxi/pseuds/Niaxi
Summary: For two years, Kari Kamiya has suffered under the weight of her dark secret; that she is in love with her brother, Tai. Having slowly shut herself away from him to try and preserve her own sanity, she lives in fear that Tai will one day discover the truth. With their parents out of town, Kari finds herself facing her nightmare scenario; a weekend alone with Tai.





	1. Pt1 01) Sorrow

**Author's Note:**

> This story was written over the course of two weeks after I rediscovered my passion for TaiKari as a pairing. It was a joy to write as I did it completely off the cuff, with no plan or set goal in mind. It is the first part in a longer story and will be updated once I have finished what I believe to be a complete part.
> 
> As the summary stated it is a love story between Tai and Kari Kamiya and therefore involves incest. If this makes you uncomfortable then please do not read any further. For this reason I have rated it as M, however, there is the occasional use of bad language and themes of depression and hurt. While part one does not include any sexual content, I will not rule it out in future parts. In the event that it occurs, I will give a warning at the start of the appropriate chapter and change the rating if necessary.
> 
> In terms of chronology, it takes place after the events of 02, but ignores Tri.
> 
> I would also like to dedicate this story to all fans of TaiKari as a pairing and in particular, to those whose stories I read many, many years ago.
> 
> If you have any thoughts or comments regarding this story please leave a review.
> 
> I do not own Digimon or any of its associated characters. I do, however, own the characters of Iowa and Teiko.
> 
> P.S: If you enjoy this story and are interested, the first part of my debut novel, Ensnared, is available to read here on the archive. The link is provided below. 
> 
> https://archiveofourown.org/works/24587473/chapters/59386159
> 
> Warmest regards  
Niaxi

**Part One: Her Secret**

**Chapter One: Sorrow**

A gentle breeze rustled a few dried leaves that lay in the gutter alongside the sidewalk that Kari Kamiya currently walked. A few loose chips of stone from a broken slab crunched under her black school shoes. It was early autumn but the temperatures had yet to dip down to a level that would typically be considered cold. Nevertheless, the child of light felt a chill on her pale skin and thought for a moment about quickening her pace. Except that would only serve to speed up her arrival home; not something she relished. It had been a hard day… no scratch that, hard week… month… year? She didn’t know anymore. And it was getting to the point that she no longer cared. She let out a mirthless laugh. The funny thing about depression was that the longer you suffered, the better you got at hiding it from everyone else around you; especially those you cared about.

How had it all come to this? Downtrodden and alone on a Friday evening, while walking home to an apartment that would have no parents until she returned home from school at the same time on Monday. Was this not supposed to be the teenage dream? An entire weekend of freedom. Another cruel joke. For she was never free. Give her a car, or better yet a motorbike, and she could ride off into the sunset to somewhere uninhabited. Yet still, she would be unable to escape the trappings of her own head. Or the sick, twisted thoughts that formed in its darkest recesses and sprung to the surface like little gnawing creatures when she least expected it.

She stopped at a crossing and waited for the walk sign to illuminate; three other pedestrians joining her. On a normal day, she would have cycled to school. Except when she’d gone to unlock her bike this morning, she’d discovered it had a puncture. Just another one of the nice little gifts life liked to leave for her. When the sign eventually changed, she crossed to the other side and stopped. Off to her right, she could see her apartment building out in the distance; about five minutes away. She went left. No parents meant no set dinner time and effectively no rules. Sure Tai, her older brother, would have been charged with ‘looking after her’, but he played it loose with the rules himself so had no right to complain. Besides, even if he did, she could quite easily tell him to fuck off and leave her alone. She’d already alienated most of her friends, why not him too? A single tear threatened to form in her left eye as an image of her yelling at Tai and storming off into her room filled her mind. It would probably break her heart the day she had to make him hate her too. While she had used their busy school lives to naturally distance herself from her brother, they remained on good speaking terms. Still, she was under no delusion, it would happen one day… however, perhaps not today.

After ten minutes of walking, in which thoughts pertaining to Tai still swam around her head, Kari reached the grassy bank that led down to the river. Sitting atop the concrete barrier she swung her legs over and dropped down to the other side. Adjusting her skirt, she sat down on the fresh grass. It tickled the inside of her legs for a brief moment. Her gaze fell upon the slow-moving current of the crystal-clear water. It was not the first time she had found herself staring out at a body of water when succumbing to the depths of depression. She could still recall the waters of the dark ocean with unnerving clarity. Her trip there being the first time she could recall feeling this way. Only then she had wanted desperately to escape. Now… she was not so sure. Should she ever find herself on the grey sand of its beach again, she might never leave.

It was the first time she had thought about the dark ocean for a long time she realised. However, it’s emergence into her musings had reminded her of something. Delving a hand into her school bag she fished around for a minute before withdrawing a smooth wooden pendant that hung on a black cord. After the destruction of the original DigiDestined's crests, Tai had come up with the idea of making new ones so that no matter what happened, they would always have something to remind themselves of their adventures in the digital world. Kari turned it over in her hand and traced the carved pink star with a finger. She’d found it that morning while searching for a memory stick and something had compelled her to take it with her.

“The crest of light,” she said in a whispered voice, though there was little need for no one was within earshot.

Yet another joke she thought bitterly. During their first adventure, they had discovered that the crests had been made to amplify each of their strongest traits. Except that had been a very long time ago. While it may have held true for the Kari Kamiya that watched Greymon fight Parrotmon all those years ago, it certainly did not fit her now. Did she even have any light left? Not likely. Should Gatomon show up and digivolve now, Kari knew she would find herself face to face with LadyDevimon. And she doubted that it would bother her. She laughed again at the thought of how appalled the others would look if they saw her with the fallen angel. She’d wager that Tai at least would finally figure out that there was something seriously wrong with her. For a moment she stared at the water and pondered throwing the pendant in, except something stayed her hand and she found herself stowing it safely back in her bag. Apparently, she was not willing to let that part of her life slip away just yet.

The sun slowly made its way towards the horizon yet Kari Kamiya remained on the grassy river bank. Her eyes glazed over as they remained fixed upon the slow-moving current. At times like this, when she lost herself in some scene or piece of music, her mind involuntarily started to recount some of the events that had led her to this point. Her relationship with TK being the focus of today's bout of self-loathing. It had all felt so natural at the time, expected even. The pair had become close friends during their time in the digital world and it had continued when he had moved to her school. They hung out all the time and she had known for weeks before he asked her out on a date, that the boy wished for their relationship to become more than just friends.

She should have said no, Kari lamented. It would have saved both his heart and their friendship; which she’d cherished dearly. Only she had been foolish. Foolish to think that her feelings would change if she dated someone else. For she was already in love with someone else. Someone who would never love her back. At least not in the way she loved him. So TK had become the surrogate; the distraction. Granted for a time it had worked. They had held hands in school, went on dates, she’d even snuggled close to him on the couch while they’d watched Kill Bill. For those few months, she had been content, happy even. Only the bubble burst the night he first kissed her. It had genuinely taken her by surprise, so her non-reaction had been more than justified. Yet while she had felt his love and passion within it, it had failed to awaken her own; for him at least. Instead, the forbidden feelings that she had suppressed for several months had broken free from their bonds and started to haunt her once more. Every subsequent kiss had only led her to wonder what her paramour’s lips would taste like. How it would feel if he were the one kissing her. That was when she’d started to become distant. Slowly she’d started to spend less time with her friends and more time alone. Naturally, TK had been the first to notice. When he’d started to feel her slip away, he’d assumed that it was his fault, that he had not been attentive enough.

The poor sod, Kari thought. For anyone else, he would be the perfect boyfriend. Kind, caring, never forceful or pushy, always trying to put his partner's happiness before his own. Except he had wasted himself on her. It was still so vivid in her memory, the night she broke his heart. TK had gone all out to plan their first-year anniversary celebration. A dozen red roses had been delivered to the Kamiya residence that morning and taken the entire household by surprise. The accompanying note had cordially invited her to dinner and sent her mother into a dizzy frenzy while eliciting a comment from her father about how TK seemed like a ‘proper gentleman’. Even Tai had given his approval. Her mother had promptly taken her to the mall to buy her a new outfit for the occasion.

When evening had rolled around, Kari had been dressed in a short red dress with black stockings and shoes. At 6:30 pm TK had arrived dressed in full shirt and tie; complete with jacket. When she walked out of her bedroom he’d instantly declared her beautiful, causing her cheeks to turn the same colour as her new dress. He’d then escorted her downstairs to a waiting taxi. At a window seat in a small Italian restaurant, they’d sat and watched the rain begin to hammer down as they ate the first two courses of a wonderful meal. The metaphorical and literal lightning had struck just as two slices of the establishment's renowned cheesecake had arrived. Looking back the irony of it all had been the fact that TK had begun by apologising. As though it had been his fault that she had started to become distant. The alarm bells had started to ring inside her head when he reached inside his jacket pocket. Opening the small box, he’d sat it on the table and explained that it was a promise ring and that, when the time was right, he would replace with an engagement ring. He’d then looked her in the eye and professed his love for her. A love that she knew she could never return.

At that moment Kari had known she had just been hurtled to a crossroads. While it had become an inevitability after their first kiss, she had never imagined that it would arrive with so much weight. With little time to digest the situation, she had been forced to choose between breaking the boy's heart there and then, or allowing the charade to continue and risk hurting him even more. She’d never wanted it to come to this, nor even contemplated that it would when she’d first said yes to him. However, she was left with two equally bad choices and the hardest decision she’s ever faced. In the end, while it hurt her to do so, she’d gone with the former.

Kari could still remember the feeling of the tears that had run down her face like beads of water from an ice cube on a summers day. And the broken whisper that was her voice when she said the words, _“I’m sorry.”_ At first, TK had just stared at her, stunned into silence. Probably having never even contemplated such a response from her. When he did not reply, she’d eventually managed to say, _“TK, I’m so sorry, but I can’t accept this.”_

Tk had, of course, taken this to mean that the gesture had simply been too much for her to process. Naturally, he’d tried to calm her down, apologised for perhaps being a tad forward and told her that they didn’t have to move that fast if she wasn’t comfortable with it. If only she had been able to properly explain things to him, she might have been able to negate some of the damage. Except she had been too overcome by a cocktail of fear, guilt and sorrow served with a garnish of self-loathing to act rationally. Instead, her tears had intensified and she’d said, _“I’m so sorry TK... but I don’t love you the way that you love me... I’m... I’m in love with... someone else.”_ Through her blurry eyes, she had been able to see the hurt in his now shocked brilliant blues when he realised that she was telling the truth. It had been more than she could bear. Picking up her bag and jacket, she had run from the restaurant as fast as her new heels would allow. She never did get to taste the cheesecake.

After a reminder of how wet she had gotten in the thunderstorm and the subsequent illness she had suffered, Kari’s mind allowed her to return to the present. Yet her relationship and subsequent breakup with TK was only the first in a string of events. There had been the fling she’d had with Davis that had become a train wreck. The catfight with Sora, after she had rejected Tai in favour of Matt; she’d clawed the girls face enough that it had required stitches. Her fallout with Yolei. And, of course, the main issue. The singular reason that ran through every other event and incident that had occurred over the past two years. Tai. For it was him, her very own flesh and blood that she had fallen in love with.

An image of her brother floated through her mind. His messy mass of brown hair above a pair of perfect chocolate eyes. His well-defined upper torso and abs. She shuddered at the thought of those abs. At how it would feel to rub her hands over them. For a few blissful moments, Kari drowned in her own decadence and desires. Only her mind would not allow it to last; it never did. The instant the word sinful reared its ugly head, the scene shifted and she was drawn down into the depths of her own depravity. She saw the look of disgust on her brothers face when he discovered how she felt about him. The yelling of her parents as they reprimanded her for being such a wicked daughter. And the catcalls and shunning she would be forced to endure, should her secret become schoolyard gossip.

Kari could not contain herself as she burst into tears. How could this have happened? Why was she cursed to love the one person whom she could never be with? Why must she be forced to watch him day after day, yet be unable to reach out to him? Unable to have any form of prolonged contact with him for fear that he would figure out her secret. Why had she been fated to fall in love with Tai?


	2. Pt1 02) A great day for freedom

**Part One: Her Secret**

**Chapter Two: A great day for freedom**

“See you on Monday, Tai.”

Tai Kamiya turned his head and caught sight of the short auburn hair that belonged to his friend Izzy. “Later, Izzy,” he called out before turning back to walk in the opposite direction.

Traversing the milling crowd, he made his way across the entrance hall of Odaiba High School and out into the warm early evening sun. Free at last, he thought to himself as he waved a hand at one of his soccer team buddies who was too far away for a verbal goodbye. The week had been gruelling, a far too common occurrence of late. And he had been living on a knife-edge all day. Each lesson bringing with it the threat of weekend homework. His class had come close to slipping over the edge twice but had somehow managed to dodge the bullets. While not a fan of homework in general, what school kid was? He had worked all week to clear his schedule in the hopes of catching a lucky break. Perhaps it had been his turn. Even lotteries had to be won by someone. Regardless, the reason for the effort, prayer and human sacrifice, ok so that last one was a joke, had been because his parents were out of town this weekend and wouldn’t be back till sometime Monday afternoon. Yep. No parents and no homework at the same time. It was virtually the teenage equivalent of a full planetary alignment.

Reaching the bike racks, he unchained his red bicycle, pulled on his helmet and set off for home. He hadn’t gotten far before his mind began to ponder how he would spend his miracle. He’d made no plans, for had he done so, the universe would probably have taken it as a slight and thrown him a barrel load of homework for the weekend and a snap test first thing on Monday to remind him who was boss. However, having now escaped the reach of his teachers, he felt it safe to begin making some plans. The first thing to cross his mind was some manga that he had sitting on his bookshelf that he hadn’t even had time to open yet. While it didn’t exactly scream, ‘FREE WEEKEND’, he was sure there would be plenty of time to read at least one between the bigger stuff that would make the list. Video game marathon, yes. Now there was something worthwhile. He’d barely had a chance to play any video games since summer vacation. In fact, he could even go to the rental store, get something new and try completing it before the end of the weekend. Wait, scratch that! Though it was short notice, he should call the DigiDestined and invite them over for a... He hung his head for a brief moment almost causing him to crash into the back of a car. Slamming on the brakes he came to a stop and let out a sigh of relief. That had been too close. He set off again but found his happy mood somewhat deflated. Not all of his old friends saw eye to eye anymore. Indeed he himself had played a central role in the main feud.

It had all happened so suddenly that Tai still had trouble trying to comprehend just what exactly had happened. What he did know was that, for once, it had not started as a fight between himself and Matt. They’d simply been pulled in on opposite sides. Understandable, given that the epicentre had been the breakup between their respective siblings. Naturally, he’d been the first to learn of it. He’d been standing at the living room window, watching the lightning storm, when the apartment door had opened. Having not expected Kari to return from her date for at least another hour, it had immediately drawn his attention. Into the main living space had walked his sister, causing his eyes to widen in horror. Her hair was plastered to her head while water dripped to the wooden floor from the hem of her new dress.

_“Kari!”_ he’d called out in alarm, darting across the room to reach her.

She’d not responded, her eyes vacant like black holes in the sky. And had it not been for the redness, he probably would never have known she’d been crying. With their parents also out, he’d been left to help her into the bathroom so she could undress and dry. Leaving her to remove her underwear, he’d gone to fetch her some pyjamas. After handing them in, he’d headed straight for the kitchen to make her some hot chocolate. When she’d eventually come into the living room, Kari had still looked pale and like her mind had not come home with her. Tai had sat beside her on the sofa and made sure she drank the beverage, waiting until she looked more lucid before asking what had happened.

In a voice little more than a whisper, Kari had said, _“TK and I broke up.”_

The news had both shocked Tai, yet come as no surprise, as oxymoronic as it sounds. For the state his sister had arrived home in, had suggested as much. Yet it left him wondering what the hell had happened. He’d immediately given her a hug and told her he was sorry to hear that. Then asked for the details. Kari had been unwilling to talk about it so he had not forced her. She’d then thanked him for everything, disentangled herself from his loving arms and went straight to bed. Leaving Tai to wonder just how bad the breakup had been to result in his sister walking home in amidst a thunderstorm. It would be over a week before he found out. 

Tai guided his bike into the undercroft of the building that housed his families apartment. Locking it up next to Kari’s he looked down and noticed that her front tire was flat. He hoped it hadn’t been like that this morning, otherwise, she would have been stuck walking. Sliding the pump from the frame of his own bike, he bent down and unscrewed the offending wheels dust cap. A few minutes of furious pumping later and it was back up to pressure. He stopped and held his ear next to the tire. A gentle hiss was just audible.

“Guess you’re punctured,” he said out loud to the slowly deflating wheel. “I suppose you’ll just have to be the first thing on my weekend bucket list then.”

After reattaching the pump to his own bike, Tai made his way over to the stairs and up the multiple flights to the apartment. Inside his eyes took in the empty living space and his ears enjoyed the sweet, sweet sound of nothing.

“Kari?” he called out as he made his way over to her bedroom to see if she was inside.

The door was closed so he knocked, but received no reply. Poking his head inside revealed no trace of his sister. Neither did a trip to the bathroom. Poor Kari, he thought as he went into his own room. She must have found her bike tire like that when she’d went downstairs that morning and been forced to walk. He’d left first that morning as he had early soccer practice and hadn’t even noticed. While he would not have been able to repair it, he could have nipped back upstairs and given her the heads up. Along with the key for his bike lock. Granted she probably wouldn’t have taken it. Kari always had been selfless like that. Something he’d always admired about her.

Changing out of his school clothes, he hauled on a pair of blue jeans, a white long-sleeved top and an orange shirt. Dropping onto his stomach he rooted around under his bed and pulled out a large plastic crate. Strewing most of its contents across the floor, he found his bike tools at the bottom of it; typical. At least he’d got the box right first time. Checking that everything was accounted for, he left the apartment and made his way back down to the bike racks. Without Kari’s key, he did not have the luxury of being able to move the bike out into the open. Instead, he had to bend over the handlebars so he could undo the bolt that held the front wheel on. However, apart from the somewhat awkward positioning, it was fairly straight forward to unthread it using a spanner and socket wrench. After that, it took only a little manipulation of the frame to remove it so he could take it out and work on it. While he worked leisurely it did not take long for him to remove the tire and extract the inner tube. Pumping some air into it quickly revealed the leak. It was small and so could be repaired rather than replaced. Finding a suitable patch, he glued it over the hole and waited for it to dry a bit before rebuilding the wheel. He then pumped it up and re-attached it to the frame. Job done.

Back in the apartment, he cleaned up the mess he’d made of his bedroom and then headed for the sofa. Turning on the TV, Tai started to channel surf. His mind returning to his scant weekend bucket list. If he was going to rent a video game, then he would wait for Kari to come home so they could go to the store together, as she might very well want something too. However, as he tried to think of other things to add, his mind kept slipping back to the events of last year and the fallout from Kari and TK’s breakup. Consciously remembering that his best friends were now splintered had certainly put a downer on things and clearly still played on his mind.

Kari had come down with a bad bout of flu because of her walk through the rain and so missed a whole week of school. However, she barely said a word to anyone over the entire week. Come the following Monday, Tai had woken up early to make her breakfast; thus sparing her from their mothers cooking. Afterwards, he’d purposefully walked her to school and told her he would be back to walk her home. The hope had been that at some point she would open up to him about what had happened on her date. By the time he’d arrived at his own school, he’d had the bright idea of asking Matt if TK had told him anything. It turned out to be a bad one. An icy Matt had simply told him that if he wanted to know so badly he should ask his sister. The boy’s refusal to say another word to him all day had given him an early warning sign that it had not been pretty, but in no way prepared him for what was to come.

When the end of day bell had rung, Tai had bolted from his school and ran the whole way to Kari’s. He’d arrived in time to encounter Davis and a few of his soccer friends, who told him Kari was still inside. A little cajoling was all it had taken to convince him into a quick game of head tennis while he waited; his reputation still preceding him. They’d played for five, maybe ten minutes before a raised voice from the other side of the playground caught his attention. He’d known the voice but never before heard it sound so angry. Turing in its direction had revealed TK following someone towards the exit; Kari. Tai had sprinted over to intercept and caught the tail end of the argument.

_“Kari, you can’t just walk out on me without an explanation!”_

_“I’m sorry, Tk. Please just leave me alone.”_

_“You can’t expect me to just drop this after you ran off on Saturday!”_

Tai had watched Kari turn around and say, _“please just let me go, TK,”_ before turning back and trying to walk away. Her voice had been so full of sorrow that it had made Tai feel like he’d just been stabbed. And her words had not even been directed at him. Then came the first surge of anger. How dare TK upset his sister like that.

He looked on in horror as TK then reached out a hand and forcibly grabbed her shoulder, pulling her backwards. Hearing Kari utter the words, _“TK, you’re hurting me,” _had been the final straw.

Crossing the last few strides at full pelt he’d yelled, _“GET YOUR HAND OFF MY SISTER_,” seized his arm and thrown the boy backwards.

Turning his attention to Kari, he’d seen the tears run down her face and had just enough time to ask her if she was ok before TK had shoved him back. Declaring that this had nothing to do with him.

_“It does if you’re upsetting my sister,”_ he’d spat back, forcing himself between them.

However, TK was not to be deterred. _“She ran out on me on Saturday and won’t even give me a proper explanation. So either tell her to talk to me or get out of my way, Tai!”_

_“She doesn’t have to explain anything to you if she doesn’t want to. So go home, TK.”_

Perhaps if he had not been so angry, he might have said something different and been able to diffuse the situation Tai mused. Unfortunately, his words had served only to enrage the other boy. TK had lunged for him, leaving Tai with little choice but to kick him back or be floored. However, the sudden sound of a new voice had resulted in the shit well and truly hitting the fan.

_“WHAT THE HELL, TAI!”_ It was Matt.

Like himself, Matt must have come to check up on his sibling and had arrived at exactly the wrong moment. There had been no more words spoken as his best friend took a swing at him. While he’d been able to dodge it, Tai had known he was now in trouble. Matt or TK by themselves he could have handled, but not both at the same time. He’d quickly found himself on the defensive as both boys came at him. Less than a minute later he’d found himself eating dirt. Only for Davis, who it transpired had watched the entire thing from distance, to leap to his rescue. The fight had become two on two and resulted in all four boys accumulating several injuries. It had only ended when they all heard Kari fall to her knees in floods of tears. Tai had immediately rushed to her side, wincing in pain as Matt had landed a kick that had cracked one of his ribs. A teacher had then come running to ensure it did not restart. TK and Davis had been marched to the principal’s office, with Matt and himself told to leave immediately.

To say he had taken Kari home would not quite be accurate as it had actually been her supporting him as they walked. Back in the apartment she’d burst into tears once more and apologised for him getting hurt on her behalf. In her mind, TK had been within his rights to feel upset and that it had been her refusal to talk to him that had resulted in the four-man brawl. She’d then told him the whole story. It had been hard to listen to his sister talk with so much pain in her voice. However, afterwards, he had assured her that if she did not feel the same way about TK as he did about her, then she had done the right thing to end the relationship. That and TK should have respected her decision, instead of getting angry at her. And that he certainly should not have grabbed her like that. She’d then helped him patch up his wounds. If only something could have been done to patch up the group.

Tai pulled out his phone and checked the time. School had finished almost two hours ago yet Kari had still not come home. Even without her bike, it should only have taken her just over half an hour. He looked to see if he had any missed calls or texts; nothing. It was not like Kari to go somewhere without telling some… he paused mid-thought. That wasn’t quite true anymore. Of late he could recall their mother asking him on several occasion about her whereabouts. In fact, now that he thought about it, that was not the only difference in her. For one thing, he rarely saw her out with meal times. And he was sure he’d caught a glimpse of her wearing black last week. Kari never wore black. Tai’s face fell upon this sudden realisation. Had he been that busy with school work and soccer practice that he’d only recently started to notice changes in his sister? Hell, it had been her birthday two weeks ago and he’d blindly accepted it when she’d explained the lukewarm reaction to her presents as being down to having a headache. Other incidents that he’d either ignored, swallowed an odd explanation for or simply forgot about started to play through his mind. And it shocked him to realise that they stretched right back to her breakup with TK.

Tai looked at his message log, as though the sheer absence of texts from his sister confirmed his theory. Kari had changed and he’d barely noticed. Well, starting tonight that was going to change. He had an entire free weekend and he intended to use it to reconnect with his sister. Sending her a quick text asking if she was ok, Tai then scrapped his scant weekend bucket list and started again. Pizza and movies, he decided quickly. Surely even new Kari would enjoy that. That way he would have a chance to talk to her and gauge what she might like to do. Yeah. This weekend was no longer about him, it was about both of them.


	3. Pt1 03) What do you want from me

**Part One: Her Secret**

**Chapter Three: What do you want from me**

The sound of her cell phone vibrating from inside her bag drew Kari’s attention away from the water. She looked around for a brief moment as though slightly bewildered to find herself sitting on the river bank. She undid the sailor collar of her school uniform and used it to dry her eyes before fishing in her bag for her phone. The clock on the front drew her attention; she’d been sitting for nearly two hours. Dismissing it, she opened the message though did not need to see the senders name to know it would be from Tai. It was rare for someone out with her family to message her these days and given that she should have been home hours ago it came as no surprise. _“Hey, Kari, are you ok? Message me when you get this as I’m getting kinda worried,” _she read and almost burst into tears again. Any other brother would probably have demanded to know where she was, why the hell she had not come home yet and to get her ass back asap, but not Tai. Instead, he’d replied with kindness and concern for her wellbeing. It was one of the many reasons that she’d fallen for him. While she had not wished to go straight home, for being around her brother had become intoxicating, she had not intended to avoid going home that long so as to worry him. Hastily she messaged him back, _“sorry, didn’t mean to worry you. I’ll be home in 15.”_

Putting her phone back into her bag and retying her sailor collar, Kari stood up and made her way back up the grassy slope to the concrete wall that separated the river bank from the sidewalk. Crossing to the other side she drew a funny look from a passing couple but ignored them. At a modest pace, she set out for home and the better part of two and a half days of torture. For that was what spending time with Tai had become. And with their parents gone he might be more likely to notice that she spent most of her time shut away in her room (Tai had been given their fathers office as a bedroom just over two years ago). The last thing she needed was him to quiz her about it. With any luck, he would have plans over the next two days or a mountain of homework. For she certainly didn’t.

Crossing the road and entering her apartment building, Kari glumly climbed the stairs. Her footsteps somewhat akin to those of a prisoner en-route to the gallows. Reaching her floor she walked the short distance and stood outside the door marked Kamiya. She took a long, slow breath before reaching out for the handle and opening it. Stepping across the threshold she removed her school shoes and replaced them with her indoor ones. Quietly she walked into the main living area of the apartment. If she could reach her room before alerting Tai, she might get away with simply shouting hello to him. So focused on her goal she failed to notice that the refrigerator door in the kitchen was open.

“Hey, Kari.” She froze mid-step and looked over towards the kitchen to see Tai standing next to the fridge with a can of soda in his hand. The concern in his tone obvious.

Just relax, she told herself, diverting her gaze but at the same time trying not to alert him to that fact. Even looking at Tai could be difficult these days if she had not adequately steeled herself beforehand. His soft caring features could both make her heart melt and stir her loins. “Hey,” she eventually replied, her voice sounding delicate, almost fragile. Before her brother could reply she started off once more towards her room.

“So what kept you, Sis?”

The question caught Kari off guard and she cursed internally. Why couldn’t Tai just leave her be? Because he wouldn’t be Tai if he did, her brain answered for her. It was right, of course. Ever since that fateful incident where he had taken her to the park when she was sick, Tai had looked out for her. He’d comforted her when she’d been sad, stood up for her when others had picked on her, listened when she needed to talk and so much more. Just another reason why she loved him.

She must have taken longer to think up a reply than she realised, for Tai then said, “you ok, Kari?”

“I’m fine,” she mumbled generically, her mind still racing to find an answer to his question. “I needed some air after school so went for a walk. I eventually sat down somewhere and must have lost track of time.” It wasn’t a blatant lie, simply not the exact truth. However, somehow she did not think, ‘I didn’t want to come home because it means being alone with my brother, whom I’m in love with,’ would go down very well. Instead, she simply added, “I’m sorry if I worried you.”

Tai gave her a look that she knew meant he was sceptical. And while he elected not to pry, still left the door open should she need it, “if you need to talk, I’ll be here for you, Sis. By the way, I fixed your bike”

“Thanks, Tai,” she replied, internally voicing, ‘you don’t know how much that means to me’.

She had reached her bedroom door and turned the handle, almost safe inside her sanctuary, before Tai then said, “speaking of being here, I thought we could sit and watch some films tonight. It’s been ages since we last hung out. What do you say? We can order pizza.”

Kari felt her cheeks begin to burn on hearing Tai’s suggestion. Yet again she found herself completely unprepared for her brother's remark. This was her nightmare scenario coming to fruition but at the same time something she desperately desired. It made her feel like a lactose intolerant craving a glass of milk. Could she restrain herself enough so as not to let her feelings show? She already felt like she walked on a tightrope around Tai anyway, one wrong step from certain doom. Was it worth risking a fatal fall just so she could revel in having her brothers undivided attention for a single night? She let out a slow exhale.

“Sorry, Tai. I’ve got a lot of homework to do this weekend,” she lied with regret, “I need to make a start on it.”

Kari opened her bedroom door and crossed the threshold. She jumped when she felt a pair of firm hands catch her by the shoulders. The blush in her cheeks turned scarlet. She hadn’t even heard Tai move. “Come on, Kari,” he whispered in her ear, “you can’t spend your whole life studying. You’ll turn into Joe.”

Without meaning to, she burst out laughing. Tai somehow always managed to make her laugh, regardless of whether his joke was funny or not. Nevertheless, she tried to reaffirm her stance, “Tai, I really need to...” her second bout of laughter was forced from her lips as Tai began furiously tickling her armpits. “AHHH...TAI...STOP IT,” she yelled through fits of hysterics.

“Not until you agree to ditch the books and join me for pizza and movies.”

“TAI...AHHH...I...AHHH...OK...OK...YOU WIN!”

The tickling ceased and Kari felt Tai let go of her. She sucked in a grateful breath of air as she steadied herself before turning to face her brother. “That was mean,” she pouted playfully. At that moment she realised that without doing any special, Tai had lifted her mood. Hell, he’d even got her to laugh, even if most of it had been under duress. She’d almost forgotten what her own laugh sounded like.

“True, but you look like you could use the R&R.” He turned to leave but when he reached the door he stopped. “You’d better have your butt on that sofa in ten minutes or I’ll be back to drag you out.” He looked over his shoulder and grinned, “and woe betide you if I hear the sound of a pencil scratching.”

Kari felt a rush on hearing the playfulness with which Tai issued his command and before she could restrain herself she gave him a sassy smile and said, “maybe I should use a pen then.”

For a moment, her red eyes locked onto his chocolate browns and her heart was overwhelmed with feelings of love and warmth. Only right on cue an ice-cold bucket of guilt and self-loathing poured over her. Fortunately, Tai broke contact before it showed on her face. She watched him go and fought to hold back the tears. She couldn’t do this. Being around him but unable to express her feelings was becoming unbearable. How on earth was she going to survive an entire night just the two of them? She needed her music, but Tai had only given her ten minutes to get changed. And she dare not risk him dragging her out. The extra physical contact between them might make her explode.

Hastily she picked up her headphones, a decent set of cans, and mp3 player from the desk She’d come to depend on her music when preparing for situations where she would have to be around Tai and when trying to clear her mind of her fucked-up thoughts. With limited time she would be restricted to a shorter passage, but already knew which artist she would turn to; Mike Oldfield. She’d first heard his music at one of Yolei’s sleepovers, where they’d watched an old horror film; The Exorcist. The film had been pretty poor, although after having seen beings such as Myotismon and Piedmon, nothing any filmmaker could do would likely scare her. However, she had been intrigued by one of the films musical pieces. An internet search the next day had revealed it to be the opening segment from an album by Oldfield. Curious, she had taken a trip into town and hunted around several CD stores until she found a copy. Back home her first surprise was that the album consisted of only two tracks, each about twenty-five minutes long. Most songs she had ever heard lasted only a few minutes, five or six at the very most. However, this was nothing compared to the music she discovered once she put it on. Each piece was a sprawling instrumental of multiple layers that moved effortlessly from one movement to the next. Needless to say, it had blown her away. After multiple listens over the course of a week she’d found that she could lose herself within it in a way that just wasn’t possible with other music. Since then she had collected some of Oldfield’s other albums and listened to them on a regular basis. Unfortunately, she had no time for one of his longer composition, so would have to make do with the opening tracks from The Songs of Distant Earth. Its first three tracks were quite soothing and would hopefully calm her enough so that she could regain some measure of control.

Dressing down to her underwear she riffled through her closet looking for something to put on. Half of her brain urged her to dress in something appealing, while the other screamed that to do so would be unnecessarily risky. Eventually, after rifling through all the clothes that her mom had bought her, she looked at the few items she'd recently bought for herself. While she still dressed like the Kari her family thought they knew when around them, she’d acquired a few articles of clothing for wearing when by herself. Pulling out a pair of ripped black jeans and a slashed green t-shirt with the word ‘weirdo’ scrawled across it, she paused. While there was a chance it would draw Tai’s attention, she really did not feel like being the ‘innocent angel of light’ tonight.

After she’d dressed she sat on the edge of her bed, closed her eyes and just listened. The notes washed over her like a soothing balm for her soul. Oldfield’s guitar tracing a path through a sea of keyboards, drums and vocal cords. For those blissful few minutes, her troubles melted away and she felt liberated. If only she could stay here within the music instead of having to suffer the torment that was Tai. Only it was not to be. The third track drew to a close and she knew it was time to go. Removing her headphones she sat them down on the bed beside her music player. Rising to her feet she left the room.

Kari’s eyes wandered across the apartment and stopped when they fell upon the bushy mass of chocolate hair that belonged to her brother. He turned his head and smiled at her when he heard her approach, beckoning her to come and sit on the sofa.

“So what do you want on your pizza?” Tai asked as she watched him peruse the menu.

All she did was give him a smile.

“That’ll be double pepperoni with sweetcorn on a thin base then.”

“Did you even need to ask?” she replied as she dropped down beside him. She’d have preferred the armchair, but that would have drawn questions.

While a stupid grin covered his face, his eyes looked her up and down as if he had not seen her in a long time. When she made eye contact with him he hastily said, “if I’d just ordered for you, you’d probably have told me you preferred anchovies with olives, or something like that, when it arrived.”

She watched as Tai returned his attention to the menu, but could not help but feel something was not quite right with him. In fact, it wasn’t just a feeling. She knew. Call it intuition or whatever you like, if there was one thing in this world Kari knew, it was her brother. Had her attire caught his attention already? Surely it could not have been that much of a culture shock. She sighed internally. She should have just worn something pink and yellow. Picking up the TV remote, she began channel surfing, hoping to find something that would serve as a distraction.

“So what films do you want to watch?” Tai eventually asked, causing her to jump slightly.

“I’m not fussed,” she replied, not averting her gaze to look at him. “So long as it’s not a chic film.”

“Ok... why not a chic film?”

Kari’s head snapped round to look at him. She had not realised that she’d spoken that last line out loud. “I don’t like them.”

“Seriously?” the tone of surprise was evident, “since when?”

“Since I stopped liking what everyone else liked.” After the words had left her lips, Kari regretted it. While it felt liberating to say out loud, she knew her luck would not hold a second time. Tai would start to pry.

He gave her another roving look, “you’ve changed a lot over the past two years, haven’t you.”

While she felt an urge to say, ‘took you long enough,’ she knew it wasn’t entirely fair. She’d done her utmost to try and hide it from everyone. Instead, she simply sighed, “yeah.” There was little point denying it; the Gatomon was out of the bag.

It was Tai’s turn to let out a low sigh, “I’m sorry, Kari.”

This took her by surprise. Tai was apologising to her, why? What did he possibly have to say sorry for?

“I guess with all my schoolwork, soccer practice and other stuff, I’ve not really been paying attention to my little sis.” He paused and scratched the back of his head, “it’s kinda why I wanted to spend some time with you tonight.”

Kari had to quickly turn her attention back to the TV to try and hide the fact that her cheeks had slowly started to burn again. She sucked in a slow, steady breath and tried to recall the opening portion of The Songs of Distant Earth. She often found herself playing music in her head from memory when she needed to try and calm herself.

“Kari?”

Shit. Tai expected her to say something. “Don’t worry about it,” she said offhandedly, “I’ve been busy too.”

There were a few minutes of silence in which she thought she’d managed to kill the conversation. Except Tai had other ideas. “Kari...” he began with what sounded like slight trepidation, “...are you mad at me?”

The question hit her like a bolt of lightning and she spun around to face him. Immediately she could see the look of hurt on his face. He’d already made up his mind. She felt a stab of guilt at having hurt his feelings. Even though she had deliberately tried to put distance between them these past two years, she had not realised just how much the revelation pained him. Unfortunately, there had been no alternative and the situation, if anything, had become worse. The day would come when she would have to sever ties with him completely. He would never understand why and might even blame himself. Only there would be no other option. It was better that than have him discover the horrible truth.

She forced herself to look him in the eye, “I’m not mad at you, Tai.”

He looked slightly puzzled, “then what’s wrong, Kari?”

Crap, he’d bought the truth. Now she’d have to sell him a different lie. “It’s just been hectic at school recently. And I’ve had a lot on my mind.” She gave him a smile and quickly tried to deflect, “maybe you’re right. Maybe I do need some R&R. So what film do you want to watch?”

He returned her smile with one of his own, but his eyes told her that she’d failed to convince him. That was part of the problem when dealing with Tai. She might know him better than anything else, but the reverse was also true. She’d not heard the end of this. That at least was certain. And Tai had the rest of tonight and two full days in which to interrogate her. She watched him stand up and head over to the phone to make the pizza order. This weekend was quickly becoming even tougher than she’d anticipated.


	4. Pt1 04) Poles apart

**Part One: Her Secret**

**Chapter Four: Poles apart**

A thumping guitar accompanied the end credits of the film and Tai stood up from the sofa and wandered over to the kitchen. They’d watched The Matrix, which, surprisingly, had been Kari’s choice. Then again it was one of what he suspected would be many surprises regarding his sister over the next few days. The first being what she was currently wearing. Gone were the light colours and summery look that he’d always associated with her. Instead, she had attired herself in ripped black jeans and a slashed green t-shirt. The colours accentuating her pale skin, rather than blending with it. Altogether it gave her a sort of teenage angst/punk look. And Tai wondered whether or not she’d given any thought to dying her hair some primary or secondary colour. She’d certainly suit it, given her new look.

Tai shook his head as he caught himself wondering whether she’d look better with red or turquoise highlights. She probably would not thank him for fashion tips. Regardless, her new style of dress may well be offering him an early insight into how she currently felt. He hoped not, as he could not bear to think that his sister had been struggling emotionally and it had taken something so blatant as a change of wardrobe for him to take note. However, he had a sinking feeling that he’d not just dropped the ball on this one, but rather tossed it off a cliff. After picking the film, she’d barely even looked at him, let alone spoken to him. In fact, it had felt like a struggle getting her to talk before he’d ordered the pizza.

Opening the fridge he looked back over towards the sofa. “You want a soda, Kari?” he called, hoping it would offer him a route back through the door labelled conversation. When he got no response he tried a little louder, “Kari?”

The delayed response of, “Hmm,” was accompanied by a swivel of her head to face him.

“You want a soda?”

A nod was all he received. So much for kick-starting conversation, he thought as he grabbed two cans of soda from the fridge before closing it. However, not before giving a cursory glance to a casserole dish containing one of their mother's infamous experimental nightmares. He’d rather take a second round with Piedmon before touching that, much less eat it. Needless to say, it would only be eaten as a last resort on Sunday night and even then he’d need to be starving. Assuming it was still there, of course. He wouldn’t put it passed anything their mother made to sprout legs and make a bid for freedom. Not that he would stand in its way. He chuckled to himself on the way back to the sofa as he imagined the abomination sitting in the casserole dish running for the door. Sitting back down he held Kari’s soda out to her and waited for her to take it.

“So I thought we could go into town tomorrow, maybe do some shopping and get lunch,” he said when she took hold of the can.

Kari’s red eyes shot up to meet his own and in the space of a few seconds, he was sure her facial expression had changed from one of joy to horror and then to dismay. It had been as if he’d magically pulled Gatomon out from behind his back, slit the Digimon's throat and finally revealed it to be nothing more than a stuffed animal. It made completely zero sense. Less even, if that were possible. His sister quickly turned her head back towards the TV.

“I already told you, I’ve got a mountain of homework to do,” she said. The dismay was evident in her tone, but given what he’d just witnessed Tai reasoned that now was the time for a good bluff.

“Really? Cos I checked with Davis earlier and he said you guys got off scot-free this weekend.”

There was a pause in which Tai suspected Kari was trying to think up a lie. “What would that bonehead know?” she then said testily.

“He’s in all your classes,” he replied smoothly, “and if that bonehead doesn’t have homework, nobody in the class does.”

“So what, now you’re spying on me!” she shot back with venom, her eyes rounding on him and ablaze.

Something else new, he thought. Kari of old did not do anger, at least not to this degree and certainly not so quickly. However, Tai held his nerve. “No, I just have a good idea when my sister’s lying to me.”

He could practically hear Kari cursing internally as he revealed his hand, the sour expression now on her face serving as further confirmation. Indeed such was the level of irritation radiating from her that he suspected she had not meant to vocalise, “so you think,” when she turned away from him once more.

He took a moment to allow the tension in the air to diffuse somewhat. While it had been a cheap trick and Kari had every right to be annoyed at them both, it did give him something else to think about. She had deliberately lied to him in order to escape having to eat pizza and watch a film with him. Yet she had sounded so genuinely dismayed at having to turn him down and then relented to a simple tickle attack that it made no sense. If she had been so set against it, she could simply have told him no. This was not something he was going to unravel in one night he realised. However, he had to start somewhere, so elected to use her own last words as a jumping-off point.

“How about when you didn’t like any of your birthday presents the other week?”

The unopened can of soda that Kari had been holding the entire time fell to the floor with a hollow thud. This time she turned her entire body to face him. “How did you…” she said, so stunned that she didn’t actually finish the question.

While the thought crossed Tai’s mind that he could come up with some clever reasoning, he decided that if he wished her to be honest with him, then he should be honest in return. “I didn’t, at least not at the time. I fell for that headache excuse like everyone else.”

“Then what gave me away?”

“You didn’t text me to say that you would be home late today.”

The look Kari gave him was now less of shock and more of puzzlement, “what does that have to do with anything?”

“At first I thought it was odd, but then I started to remember all the times lately when mom’s asked me if I knew where you were. It was then I realised that something hasn’t been quite right with you lately and I’ve been so busy with schoolwork and soccer practice to notice. I started to think back over the past few weeks and your birthday stood out in my memory. That and a time I was sure I saw you go into your room wearing black jeans.”

When he finished, Kari let out a laugh but he could tell that it was slightly hollow. However, before she could reply he added, “I’m sorry, Kari.”

She gave him a blank look, “sorry for what?”

“For not paying much attention to you over the past year. You had that horrible breakup and after the dust settled I just forgot about you,” Tai answered, hoping that his tone properly conveyed how sorry he felt.

“You did more than enough for me at the time,” Kari offered in his defence, “besides, it’s not your job to look after me. I can take care of myself.”

“I should at least know enough about my sister to be able to buy her a birthday gift she likes.”

For some strange reason, Kari looked slightly hurt at that last comment. Even though it had only served to highlight his own failings. “It’s not your fault, Tai,” she said, sounding every bit as sorry as he himself had. “I’ve not been in a good place since I broke up with TK. And haven’t really let anyone get close to me.”

“At least Davis had the decency to accept that you wanted to break up with him. Unlike some people.”

She laughed, “who would have thought Davis would be more understanding than TK, especially after all the flirting and showing off he used to do around me.”

“I guess out of the two, he actually cared more about how you felt.”

“I guess so,” Kari said in a tone that told Tai that both relationships still played heavily on her mind.

At this point, he thought it best to change the subject. While there was certainly more to her issues than two old relationships, he did not want to push her too far too soon or she might close down on him again. Instead, he elected to re-broach his offer from earlier, “so since the homework gods have let us both off the hook this weekend, let’s go into town tomorrow.”

The same oxymoronic mix of emotion displayed on Kari’s face but lingered longer. It felt like she desperately wanted to say yes, yet at the same time couldn’t. It just made no sense. While she wrestled with the decision, he decided to sweeten the deal, “I’ll buy you a new birthday present.”

“You don’t have to do that, Tai.”

“I want to. You at least deserve something for your sixteenth birthday that you’ll actually like. Even if its two weeks late.”

Kari gave him a warm smile and Tai pondered whether it was the first genuine one she’d given him all night. “Ok, we’ll go. But you really don’t have to buy me anything.”

“We’ll have fun, I promise,” he said as he reached out to give her a hug.

It took a moment or two for Kari to return the gesture and Tai could not help but feel like there had been some form of resistance from her. Still, given the now apparent distance that existed between them, he shouldn’t have expected anything more. It was going to take time to re-establish their relationship and he fully intended to do so. He just hoped Kari was willing to do so too.


	5. Pt1 05) Wearing the inside out

**Part One: Her Secret**

**Chapter Five: Wearing the inside out**

“Stupid, stupid, stupid!” Kari cursed under her breath as she paced back and forth between the bedroom and balcony doors. In a fit of rage, she threw her hands into the air and kicked one of her indoor shoes across the room. How could she have been so stupid? She let out a long exhale as she tried to calm down. The answer to her question was obvious, it had been Tai; her kryptonite. The more he’d talked, the more she’d involuntarily opened up to him. Just like a flower exposed to the sun. Yes, she’d gotten angry when led to believe he was spying on her. However, after that, she had slowly started to engage with him. Culminating in her agreeing to go shopping and for lunch with him tomorrow. Not to mention that hug he’d sprung on her. She’d thought her heart was going to burst out of her chest.

Her eyes closed as she drowned in the memory. Tai’s strong arms wrapping around her, instantly making her feel safe. The fabric of his shirt rubbing against her cheek as she’d taken a deep breath in through her nose. His scent, a mix of fresh grass, honey and lavender, had been a feast for her nose. Then there had been the warmth radiating from his chest and the brief moment when she’d been able to hear his heartbeat. The only thing she wished she could change was the fact that she had not returned the hug. So worried about exposing her true feelings, she had failed to show any. She hoped Tai had not felt hurt by it. The last thing she wanted to do was hurt him. Even though she knew that someday she would have to do so irreparably.

There was nothing more she could do about it, Kari eventually reasoned. She had survived tonight and would just have to find a way to keep control of herself tomorrow. Stripping off her jeans and t-shirt, she pulled on some cotton pyjamas and picked up her mp3 player and headphones. She’d listen to one album now before bed and try to squeeze in two tomorrow morning before they left to go into town. Climbing under the covers she set her alarm clock, turned out the lights and started The Songs of Distant Earth from the beginning. Tomorrow was going to be heaven and hell at exactly the same time.

##

_Tears glistened on Kari’s cheeks atop a sea of crimson; like tiny ruby’s. Her red eyes, so full of love and devotion, struggled to look into the bright chocolate orbs of her brother. Lip trembling, she uttered those three simple words that were often said too much, yet at the same time, not enough. _

_“I love you.”_

_Tai immediately put a hand around her head and pulled her into his chest. For a moment he simply held her, his other hand gently rubbing her back. “I love you too, Kari,” he eventually replied, his voice strong yet also caring and compassionate. _

_“No,” Kari mumbled, a fresh wave of tears washing down her cheeks and soaking her brother's t-shirt. “You don’t.”_

_“Kari, how could you possibly say that,” Tai replied, sounding both taken aback and hurt. _

_“Because it’s true,” she wailed. Balling a hand into a fist she beat it softly against his strong chest. “You don’t love me. At least not in the way I love you.” She took a breath. Here it came, the moment she had been dreading for over two years. And she knew there was nothing she could do to stop it, the weight of her secret having become too much to bear. Pulling free from his embrace, Kari looked Tai directly in the eyes. “I don’t just love you, Tai. I’m in love with you.”_

_Her brother's eyes widened and his mouth fell open, “Kari…” was all his stunned lexicon could come up with._

_Then, without warning, he shoved her away from him. Caught off guard Kari staggered backwards before losing her balance completely and crashing to the ground. Tai towered over her, a look of disgust smeared across his face. She’d never seen his features contorted into such revilement._

_“What kind of sick, twisted individual are you?” he asked rhetorically._

_“T...T...Tai...” she mumbled, but he cut her off. _

_“You disgust me, Kari. Don’t ever talk to me or come near me again. You’re sick.” He turned and started to walk away. _

_“Tai...brother...I’m sorry!” Kari wailed as she watched him go. Each of his words having struck her like a knife and then been twisted. “Don’t leave me...”_

_“Take your depraved and diseased little mind somewhere else, Degenerate.” _

_“Tai!”_

##

Kari sat bolt upright, cold sweat running down the back of her neck and panting for breath. Instinctively she froze, listening to hear if she’d yelled her brothers name out loud. Silence. Either Tai was in too deep a sleep to have heard anything, or she’d only screamed in her nightmare. Sucking in a slow breath of humid air, she glanced at her alarm clock; 6:34. There was no point going back to sleep now. Besides, she typically found herself wide awake after enduring that nightmare.

Sliding out of bed, Kari absentmindedly picked up her mp3 player and headphones and slipped out onto the balcony. The early morning air was warm but a light breeze gave it a refreshing sort of feel. Out towards the horizon, she could see the sun steadily rising against a backdrop of pale blue. Today would be a good day. Pulling on her headphones, she selected Hergest Ridge. This album had a nice, delicate opening and was a perfect way to start the day... a perfect way to take her mind away from the nightmare. Although to label it such was a slight misnomer. For it actually had a dual nature. The scenario was always the same. She would be crying and tell Tai she loved him. He’d then console her and assume she simply meant ‘love’ in the acceptable brother-sister dynamic. Then she’d tell him. At that point, he’d either reject her with disgust or confess his love for her. The latter being a fantasy from which she hoped never to wake. Except the dream had not gone down that route in over a month. She stood out on the balcony and stared out over the waking city for the entire duration of the album. The silence when it finished snapping her back to reality.

Kari walked away from the railing and back into her bedroom. Sliding the balcony door shut, she glanced over at the clock; 7:15. She’d probably best go shower now. That way she could listen to more music while making breakfast and before Tai rolled out of bed; he really did like to sleep in. Making her way out of the bedroom and to the bathroom, Kari turned on the shower and slipped off her pyjamas. The water was cool when she stepped inside but felt quite refreshing so she decided to leave it. Taking her time, she washed her hair and body, before allowing the high-pressure water to rain down upon her. Closing her eyes, she started playing a segment from another Oldfield composition from memory. The multiple layers of instrumentation along with the complexity of the piece meant it required a great deal of concentration. Making it an excellent way to focus her mind and rid it of gnawing thoughts about Tai.

After five minutes, the water temperature started to dip. It was time to get dried. Exiting the cubical, Kari grabbed a fresh fluffy white towel from the rack and started to dry herself. All the while her mind continuing to play the music. Wrapping the white bath sheet around her slender frame, she left the bathroom. Returning to her bedroom her eyes scanned the apartment for any sign that her brother had risen from his slumber; nothing. Back inside her sanctuary she finished with the towel and used a blow drier to dry her hair. She then went to the wardrobe. What to wear? Instinctively she shifted the bulk of her clothes, i.e. those her mother had bought for her, aside and instead focused on the small selection she’d purchased herself recently. Tai had finally woken up to the fact that she was no longer the little girl he remembered and so she felt no need to shoehorn herself into an outfit she hated. Instead, she could go out and be herself today. After several minutes of pondering, she eventually settled on last nights ripped black jeans, an orange t-shirt sporting a blue anarchy symbol and a short blue denim jacket. For footwear, she pulled out a left converse from a red pair and a right from a green pair. She’d put them on when they were about to leave the apartment. Sitting down at her desk, she carefully painted her nails in alternate colours to match her shoes. Finally, she applied some dark eye shadow but left her lips clean. She stood and stared at herself in the mirror. Gone was the child who wielded the power of light and in her place... an angst-ridden teen that she could now relate with. The only remnant of her old self was her hair. She’d love to dye it, but her mom would probably flip at the suggestion so she hadn’t bothered to ask. Unfortunately, her parents still held the image of their perfect daughter and couldn’t see past it. However, for today at least, she had no intention of being that girl.

Taking her mp3 player with her, Kari headed back to the bathroom. A quick rummage in the cupboard under the sink and she found what she was looking for; a tube of hair wax. Squeezing some into her hand, she rubbed it through her hair until it had gone all messed up and spikey. Much better she thought as she admired her handiwork in the mirror. Leaving the bathroom once more, she pulled on her headphones and wasted no time in selecting Tubular Bells on her mp3 player. She felt a cold rush as the haunting piano and glockenspiel notes opened the first piece. It was almost surreal she realised upon walking into the empty kitchen. Being out with the confines of her bedroom and both looking and feeling like herself. Indeed, it stirred something deep inside her that she could only categorise as... happiness. An involuntary smile formed on her lips. She could not recall the last time she’d actually felt this way. While it was not a jump for joy sort of thing, she felt liberated. And even though she knew it couldn’t last, she intended to enjoy the time she had. So long as she could keep her emotions in check, spending the whole day with Tai would be wonderful. Somewhere in the back of her mind, an alarm bell began to ring but she quashed it. Time to make breakfast.

Fetching some bread, she dropped it into the toaster. Call it a western influence, but neither she nor Tai were fans of having fish and rice for breakfast. When it was done, she spread some raspberry jam over it and sat down it down on the table with a glass of fresh orange juice. She ate while enjoying the music. Just as she was finishing she saw the door to Tai’s room opening. She glanced over at the clock; 8:05. Wow, this must be some sort of record, her brother out of bed before 10 am on a Saturday without having soccer practice or a match. She laughed internally as she watched him stagger towards the bathroom. Out of bed, yes, awake... not quite. Her heart fluttered slightly. Tai was so cute when just out of bed. While he showered, Kari put on a pot of coffee. He would probably need it once he managed to make his way to the table.

By the time the sailor's hornpipe wrapped up her album, Tai reappeared and made his way to the kitchen.

“Coffee?” Kari asked, holding up the pot.

Tai rubbed his eyes which instantly turned wide as he stared at her.

She gave him a smile and repeated her question, “would you like some coffee, Tai?”

“Kari... wow...” he uttered, robotically moving over to the table and sitting down.

She blushed slightly at what she took to be a compliment. Pouring coffee into a waiting cup, she slid it over to him. “Why don’t I make you some breakfast? Getting up at 8 am on a Saturday doesn’t seem to agree with you.”

Tai shook his head before giving her a nod. Kari stood up from where she sat and purposefully walked passed him. Deliberately giving him a full view of her new look. For the second time, that morning the alarm bell in her head started to chime, only for the rest of her brain to metaphorically shove it in a box and seal it shut. Sliding behind the kitchen worktop she put some more bread in the toaster then fixed her brother a bowl of cereal. Which she passed over to him alongside a glass of orange juice.

“I... like... your... outfit...” she heard him say around spoonful’s of cereal as he began to attack the bowl.

“Thanks,” she replied as she fetched a plate for his toast.

OMG, he likes our outfit, a voice yelled excitedly inside her head. Don’t over analyse this, a second cautioned. He simply gave you a compliment, nothing more. It does not mean that he’s suddenly decided he’s in love with you. He’s just being nice like any normal brother. The sudden popping of the toaster drew her out of the internalised struggle. Spreading it with jam, she came to the only reasonable conclusion. Tai would never return her feelings. This compliment was simply him being nice. However, since she had agreed to go into town with him, she could at least enjoy herself. Surely one day of happiness wouldn’t cause her secret to spill. After which she could return to keeping a safe distance. Placing the plate of toast down on the table in front of Tai, she retrieved his now-empty bowl and her own crockery.

“So where do you want to go in town?” Tai then asked, managing to say the full sentence in-between only two bites.

She thought for a moment while she filled the sink. “I wouldn’t mind going to the CD store. I’m feeling the need for a new album to listen to,” she paused as an idea came to her. Looking Tai straight in the eyes she said, “and I want to go to h.NAOTO.”

The last piece of Tai’s toast stopped en-route to his mouth, which hung open.

She gave him a smile as she imagined his thought process. Before last night, h.NAOTO, the hub of all things goth, punk, Lolita and steampunk, was not a store his innocent ‘angel of light’ would ever have wanted to shop in. This would certainly test how far he was willing to accept that she had changed.

“Ok…” Tai then said, apparently still digesting more than just his breakfast, “we can go there… if you like.”

“It’s exactly where I want to go,” she replied firmly, “but also the CD shop. And somewhere we can get ice cream.”

A smile slowly formed on her brothers face as she offered him some connection to the old her; she still liked ice cream after all. “Sure thing, anywhere else?”

“Nope, I’m good. Have you finished with that plate?”

Tai stared between his empty plate and the corner of toast he still held clasped in his right hand. He let out a cheerful laugh, “guess 8 am on a Saturday really doesn’t agree with me, huh.”

“Not one bit,” Kari laughed, reaching over to take the plate from his outstretched hand. “You might want to have another mug of coffee before we leave, Brother.”

Tai responded by pouring himself another mug and then looking around helplessly for the milk and sugar. He looked up at her questioningly, “I drank that first mug black, didn’t I?”

She giggled when a sour look spread across his face as if his taste buds had retrospectively supplied his brain with the taste of strong black coffee. After depositing the now clean plate in the drying rack, she decided to take pity on him. Fetching the milk and sugar, she added it to his mug before sliding back into her seat.

“So where do you want to go, Tai?”

“I should probably start looking for a new pair of football boots, my old ones are on their way out.”

“Sounds like a plan.”

She watched as Tai drained the coffee cup and then stood up. “Guess we should get going,” he said with a smile.

Kari rose from her chair and followed him towards the door. Receiving a quizzical look when she laced up her odd shoes.

“I get the feeling I’m in for a lot more surprises when it comes to you this weekend,” Tai said in amusement.

Kari opened the front door and then turned to face him, “you have no idea,” she said with a knowing smile. However, internally she lamented the fact that he never would.

After Tai locked the apartment door the pair made their way towards the stairs. One day couldn’t hurt, Kari reminded herself as the alarm bell tried to break out of its confinement. What harm could possibly come from one shopping trip?


	6. Pt1 06) Any colour you like

**Part One: Her Secret**

**Chapter Six: Any colour you like**

The subway train slowed to a halt as it announced its destination. When the doors slid open, Tai Kamiya promptly stepped out; his sister directly behind him. Walking patiently amidst the crowd, the siblings made there way up the escalator and out into the warm sunlight of a beautiful Odaiba day. Tai turned to look at his sister, still trying to get used to her new look. He’d sat and watched her while they road on the subway and thinking back, could not recall the last time he’d seen her genuinely happy. How long had she been dressing and acting like the child of light that everyone expected her to be? Putting on a fake smile each morning when inside she felt in turmoil? However, while he’d managed to coax her out of her shell, he still had no idea what troubled her so. If he was going to find out, he would have to persevere. Yet at the same time give her some space. He pondered this predicament for a moment. Perhaps the best course of action would be to just allow her to be herself today. That way he might better understand who Kari Kamiya was as a person now, rather than the perception he had taken for granted for so long.

“There’s a CD shop just up ahead,” Tai suggested as they entered one of the main shopping streets.

Kari let out a laugh that she normally reserved for when he’d said or done something stupid that she found cute, “they don’t stock the sort of thing I’m looking for. Trust me, I’ve checked.”

“Ok...” Tai replied, before asking, “what sort of thing are you looking for?”

“Something you won't find in a store that focuses on current pop rubbish.”

Tai scratched the back of his head and felt a pang of guilt. He’d bought her a pair of ‘current pop rubbish’ CDs as part of her birthday. Guess it was time to correct that particular error. “I take it you know where you're going then?”

“This way,” Kari said as she shepherded him down a side street.

The music store his sister led him to was poles apart from the one he’d referred to. Situated inconspicuously between a soba bar and a golf surplus store, Tai could have walked passed it and never known it was there had Kari not pointed it out. No neon sign adorned its front and the CD’s on display in the window were largely by bands he’d never even heard of. However, they all had one thing in common, they all looked western.

“When did you start listening to western music?” he asked as she led him inside, “and how did you find this place?”

“It took me a while,” Kari replied, electing to answer his second question first. “I went around all the chain stores in the area looking for a particular album.”

“Until someone directed you here?”

She laughed, “no. I found a copy in one of them. It was when I decided I wanted the next album, I realised that I’d have to find a more specialised store. Even though someone online told me there was one somewhere in the area, it still took me the better part of an afternoon to find this place. I was wandering around like a little lost Digimon!”

The man behind the counter glanced over at them and Tai saw a look of recollection form on his face when he saw Kari. “Good morning, Pretty Girl,” he said in a cheerful voice, his face now beaming, “it is nice to see you again.” He then looked up at Tai, “is this your boyfriend?”

He saw Kari blush at the comment before replying, “he’s my brother, Iowa.”

The shopkeeper bowed to him, a gesture which he returned, before turning back to Kari, “you let me know if there’s anything I can help you find or if you need some more advice, Pretty Girl.”

“I will, Iowa, thank you,” his sister replied before heading off down one of the aisles of CDs.

Tai followed her and waited until they were slightly further away from the counter before asking, “how many times have you been in here?”

There was a moment's silence before she replied, “this makes time number six.” Then she laughed, “I was probably even more like a little lost Digimon when I finally found this place. Iowa helped me figure out what album I wanted next. He’s really nice.”

Trying his best not to sound overprotective, Tai ventured, “and he calls you pretty girl because?”

“He used to greet his granddaughter with that term, apparently we look alike. Besides, are you suggesting I’m not pretty?”

“Wha...no...I...Kari...” he stopped babbling at the point Kari was unable to maintain a straight face. He really needed to have a comeback prepared for when she pulled that sort of comment out.

Feeling somewhat out of place, he began aimlessly flicking through the P’s while Kari stood next to him purposefully looking through the O’s. A set of albums by a singular artist caught his eye due to their interesting artworks, that including two heads large metallic heads that became a singular face depending on how you looked at it, a large collection of beds on a beach and a prism splitting a beam of light into its composite colours.

“Pink Floyd,” Kari said to him having glanced over at what he was looking at.

“How’d you know that?” Tai asked in confusion. While he certainly felt out of his depth, it was becoming apparent that his sister was not.

“Iowa showed them to me last time. He said I really should listen to them at some point.”

“Why don’t you get one then?”

“I would, but I really want these two Mike Oldfield albums,” she indicated the two CD’s she’d pulled out, “and can’t afford a third if I want something from h.NAOTO.”

He looked at the price of the two CD’s she held then took them from her, “pick one and I’ll buy you these two.”

“I can’t let you do that, Tai,” she replied glumly and held out her hand, “please give them back to me.”

It lightened his heart somewhat to discover that, despite what else may have changed, Kari still remained selfless. If more people in the world were like her, it would be a much better place. “I told you last night, I screwed up with your birthday present so today I’m going to make it up to you.”

“You don’t have to do that.”

“I want to,” he then gave her a wicked grin, “now either choose one, or I’ll pick for you and buy all three.”

“Don’t you dare, Tai Kamiya,” she said in alarm, making a grab for the two CD’s he’d taken from her.

He’d been prepared for this eventuality and quickly held them out of her reach.

“Tai, that is so unfair!”

“Better make a choice then, hadn’t you.”

“I hate you,” Kari pouted as she began flicking through the Pink Floyd CD’s, eventually selecting one with two men shaking hands on the cover, one of whom was on fire. “Iowa suggested this one to me last time. Apparently, it has some lengthy instrumental sections that he thinks I’ll enjoy.”

“Instrumental sections?” he asked, now quite curious as to exactly what sort of music she listened to.

“Yeah, the majority of the Mike Oldfield albums I have are made up of long instrumental pieces.”

A confused look formed on Tai’s face, “how on earth did you discover this stuff?”

“Yolei showed this old horror film at her last sleepover. It wasn’t very scary but had this really captivating piece of music. I checked it up online and discovered that it came from an album called Tubular Bells.”

“And then you spent half a day wandering around town looking for a copy?” Tai said, the dots now connecting in his head.

“Right. I listened to it every day for a week and found myself hooked. However, it was the only Oldfield album the CD store had, so I knew I needed to find somewhere else to shop when I decided I wanted a different one.”

They walked back towards the front of the store and waited while the elderly shopkeeper served another customer. Absentmindedly, Tai turned one of the CD’s over and looked at the back. It was called Incantations and consisted of only four tracks, each between seventeen and twenty minutes long. He sighed internally. It felt like Kari had been living two lives over the past year. The one he and his parents knew about and this other that involved black jeans, denim jackets, repeat trips to an old western music store and who knew what else. Why hadn’t she shared any of this with him before now? Had she simply thought him too busy and didn’t want to bother him? That certainly sounded like Kari, both old and new; selfless. Except something about that did not quite ring true, but he could not put his finger on it. He would just have to learn more he reasoned if he wished to figure it out. And he had a good idea how to keep the ball rolling after today’s shopping trip was over and done with.

“Kari,” he ventured, drawing her attention away from a rack that contained old vinyl LP’s, “would you play one of your albums for me when we go home?”

The look she gave him suggested that nothing would make her happier, but ever the selfless one, she asked, “are you sure?”

“Yeah, I want to hear what all the fuss is about.”

Before she could reply, Iowa called them over to the counter, “hello, Pretty Girl, what can I do for you today?”

Kari handed over the singular Pink Floyd CD.

“No Mr Oldfield today?” the man asked with a smile, “although I see you’re taking my advice.”

Tai held up the two CD’s in his hand, “I’ve got those.”

The shopkeeper glanced up at him before returning his attention to Kari, “is your brother a fan?”

“He’s just asked to be initiated tonight,” his sister replied as she handed over the money for her CD.

The man laughed, “be sure you don’t scare him off now.”

The comment made Tai feel slightly perplexed as he watched Kari take her change and the small bag Iowa handed her. “I’ll try,” she replied before moving aside so he could step forward.

Tai handed the CD’s over along with the correct change, then slid them inside his sister's bag once the man sat them atop the counter. They both said goodbye to the friendly shopkeeper, bowed, then headed back outside. When the door closed behind them, he turned to his sister, “what did he mean about scaring me off?”

Kari laughed, “it wasn’t meant as an insult if that’s what you’re wondering.”

“Then what did he mean by it?”

“A lot of people are put off this sort of music because their first experience takes them too far out with their comfort zone.”

Not entirely convinced, he gave her a funny look, “seriously?”

“You’ll understand tonight, promise.”

He took her word for it and they set off back towards the main street. “So where to now, Sis?”

Kari gave him a wicked smile, “h.NAOTO.”

Tai sighed, “if you insist. Lead on.”

Once more he found himself following his sister through the crowd. And he found himself wondering how many times she’d done this by herself. Or did she have a new group of friends that he was oblivious too? If so he would surely find out in due course. They walked for another few minutes and he had just started to ponder which sports shops he should scout in search of new soccer boots when he almost walked straight into Kari’s back.

“Oh wow!” he heard her exclaim as he struggled to stay upright.

Tai followed his sisters gaze to the window display of the store he realised was h.NAOTO.

Kari, apparently oblivious to the fact he’d almost toppled to the tarmac in an effort not to bang into her, then said, “they’re so cool!”

He looked at the display and frowned, “seriously? It’s just some boots.”

“Not the boot’s, those hairdos.”

He looked passed the display of boots to a pair of banners, each displayed a model, one with bright red hair, the other metallic silver.

“Mom would probably flip if I asked her to take me somewhere that did those sort of hairstyles.”

Tai listened to her words and could hear the longing for something that she couldn’t have. Kari never asked for anything, even if it was something she wanted. And he’d never heard her want something so much in his life. In his head, he totalled how much the two CDs he’d already bought her came to and reasoned that it did not nearly equate to a sixteenth birthday present. Not only that, he and everyone else had screwed it up big style. It was time to call in a favour.

Following Kari inside the store, Tai pulled out his phone and quickly composed a message. _“Hey, Teiko, do you still work at Shockers?”_

He had to wait a few minutes, in which he watched Kari look through a selection of punky t-shirts before he got a reply. _“Hey, Tai. How’z it hanging? Yeah. I’m actually at work just now. Wot’s up?”_

Yes, he exclaimed internally as he wrote, _“Ok, remember when I let you cut and style my hair for your folio? Now it’s payback time.” _He smiled to himself as he recalled the incident. Teiko was one of his middle school friends who had not agreed with the school system and so had gone off to do an apprenticeship in hair styling. They had kept in touch and she’d eventually, after much badgering and a slight bit of friendly blackmail, roped him into being a model for her folio. Afterwards, she had promised to pay him back anytime. He just hoped she would make good on that promise.

_“Ha, ha, ha. Did your mother actually take scissors to your hair this time?”_

Tai stifled a laugh, although would concede that he did occasionally go to bed wondering whether he’d wake up to find his mother had done just that. _“Ha, ha, no. It’s actually for my sister, Kari. I know it’s short notice, but would you be able to do her hair this afternoon?” _It was asking a lot, he reasoned when he hit the send button. However, Teiko was a good friend and the only thing better was a good friend who owed you a massive favour. He crossed the fingers of his free hand as he waited with bated breath for the reply.

_“...let me check and I’ll get back to you...”_

Way to ramp up the suspense Teiko, he thought. Looking up from his cell phone, he realised that he’d not been paying attention and subsequently lost Kari. Crap. Pocketing the device, he scanned the crowed store for any sign of her. Finding none he was left with little choice but to venture further in. Where are you, he thought, having to remind himself that he was looking for spiky hair and a denim jacket. In the end, it was Kari who found him.

“I love it in here,” he heard her voice say directly in his ear, which caused him to jump. “Lose something, Tai?”

He turned to see her with a devilish smile on her face, “you did that on purpose.”

“Who me?” she asked innocently.

He let out a sigh, that same smile had gotten his little sister out of trouble more times than he could count when they were kids and it seemed she had not lost her touch. Granted she had never been in trouble too often, maybe that was why it typically worked. “Are you finished?” he asked, spying the t-shirt and choker she had clasped in her hand.

“Yeah, do you want to go shop for soccer boots after I pay for these?”

“Maybe,” he replied tentatively. That would all depend on what Teiko said when she got back to him, but he had no intention of telling her that at present. “Or we could go have lunch.”

Kari laughed and shook her head, “like Digimon, like partner. Come on, I’ll go pay for this.”

Tai followed her to the cash desk where, fortunately, there was no queue. As he waited for her to pay, his mind wandered to the orange dinosaur that was his Digimon partner; Agumon. He might have no clue as to what his friend was doing right about now, but he’d wager anything that it involved food in some way. Whether that be daydreaming about it or actually eating it. For a rookie, Agumon had an insatiable appetite. When Kari returned, now clutching a second bag, they walked steadily towards the exit. No sooner had they left the store, his phone beeped.

_“Bring her in by one o’clock, don’t be late. P.S. This is more than I owe you, Kamiya. You can pay me back at a later date :)”_

“Who’s that?” Kari asked as he flipped his phone closed again and put it back in his pocket.

“An old friend,” he grinned, electing to keep the whole thing a surprise. “Let’s get lunch.”

“What about your boots?”

“They can wait,” he replied, “come on, why don’t we get burgers.”

##

They finished lunch by 12:15 pm and after buying them both an ice cream cone, Tai used the ruse of going to a specific store to look for soccer boots as a way of leading Kari out of the main shopping district. When the neon sign of Shockers came into view, he made a simple comment about one of his old school friends working there and if she didn’t mind, he’d like to pop in to say hello. Kari had agreed without question and happily followed him through the shop door. The hair salon had a funky look, with black leather and chrome chairs, a checkerboard tiled floor and a different bright colour on each wall. Somehow, the designer had made it work.

“Wow, you actually showed up on time, Kamiya.”

Tai looked up at a girl his age with short, spiky turquoise hair and a sassy smile on her lips. “At least I bothered to attend class, you just showed when you wanted to annoy the teachers, Sato.”

The pair stood with firm expressions on their faces after the trade of insults. Out of the corner of his eye, Tai could see Kari looked confused. However, this was war. Like a pair of old west gunfighters, they stared one another down, neither willing to flinch. After a few moments of intense eye work, he could feel the corners of his mouth begin to tug. However, he was not the only one. Come on, Kamiya, just a few more... Tai burst out laughing at the exact same time as his opponent. Crossing the distance between them, he embraced the girl before turning to his sister.

“Kari, this is Teiko, one of my friends from middle school. Teiko, this is my sister, Kari.”

“Nice to meet you, Kari,” Teiko said, stepping past him to greet his sister. “So what would you like me to do?”

“Nice to meet you too,” Kari replied, still looking confused, “Tai, what’s going on?”

He gave her a grin, “Teiko’s going to do your hair for you. Happy birthday, Kari.”

He watched as her mouth fell open in disbelief. After a few moments she managed to say, “Tai, you can’t be serious. Mom will flip.”

“Leave mom to me and tell Teiko what you want.”

A wave of excitement must have blown away her inhibition for she blurted out, “I want to look like a lit match!”

It seemed that Kari had been thinking about this for a long time Tai realised. However, her selflessness quickly kicked back in and she turned to look at him, “you don’t have to do this, Tai. You already bought me two CD’s, lunch and ice cream. Besides, it’ll cost a fortune.”

“I know I don’t have to, Kari. But I want to. You got nothing you actually wanted or like for your birthday, so I want to make it up to you.”

“Tai...”

“Come on, I could tell from how you looked at those posters that you’ve been thinking about this for some time. Now tell Teiko what you want.”

He could see the look of guilt start to form on her face as Kari turned back to the waiting figure of Teiko, “please just do something inexpensive.”

The turquoise haired girl smiled, “have a seat over there and I’ll be right with you,” she said, pointing at the chair furthest from the door.

Kari handed her bags to him and he could see the torn look on her face. He watched her walk over to the chair and once she’d sat down he turned to Teiko, “how much for you to make her look like a lit match?”

The stylist thought for a moment, “I’d have to bleach her hair, then add two different colours to it. So about ¥13,500, but for you, I can knock that down to ¥11,000.”

Tai thought for a moment on hearing the cost. Well, what did you expect, his brain piped up as he weighed up the rather substantial sum. He had the money, but it would mean going without new boots for the foreseeable future. Did he feel that guilty over Kari’s birthday or have that strong a desire to see her happy. There was only one answer to that he realised. “Work your magic, Teiko.”

“Whatever you say, Kamiya. Though I must say, she’s one lucky sister. My douche-bag brothers forgot about my last birthday.”

“I just hope she doesn’t get upset once she realises what you’re doing.”

“You just leave that to me,” Teiko said before wandering off to where Kari sat.

Finding an empty seat, he sat down in the waiting area. Praying that Kari would not feel guilty about him spending so much money on her. Unfortunately, there was one other drawback he had not considered. The contents of his mother's casserole dish would almost certainly become dinner now. 


	7. Pt1 07) One slip

**Part One: Her Secret**

**Chapter Seven: One slip**

Kari sat down upon the black leather of the hair stylists chair, not quite sure what had just occurred. Had Tai somehow managed to arrange this after simply hearing her pass commentary on a pair of banners? She shook her head. Trust her brother to discern that she’d longed to dye her hair from something so innocuous. A laugh threatened to escape from her lips, that was him all over. No one would ever understand her, or know her mind the way he did. Even after such a long time of limited interactions, they had both slipped back into their old selves with ease today. And it had felt so comfortable, like putting on an old pair of jeans that you loved and finding that they still fit perfectly, that she’d barely bothered to rain herself in. Needless to say, the sealed box in the back of her head that contained the alarm bell had since been reinforced with a thick steel outer shell and submerged in concrete.

When the turquoise haired girl walked over towards her, Kari felt a strong pang of guilt. Tai would be using the money for his new boots to pay for this she reasoned. Not to mention the heap of trouble that would no doubt land upon him when their parents got home on Monday. She would not be spared their mothers wrath, but Tai would ensure he took the brunt of it. While it was a nice gesture and she would thank him for it, Kari decided that she needed to put a stop to this.

“Ok, so what’s it to be?” Teiko said cheerfully as she placed her hands on Kari’s shoulders.

She opened her mouth to say, ‘I’m really sorry to waste your time, but I can’t have anything done,’ except the words, “I’m not sure,” escaped instead.

When she felt the girl run her hands through her hair, she knew that her chance to leave and spare Tai the expense had gone, she wanted this too much. She saw the devilish smile on the girls face reflected in the large mirror.

“This is your first time, isn’t it?”

Kari knew it was not really a question but answered anyway, “yes.”

“Then here’s what I suggest, if you’re not sure what exactly it is that you want,” Teiko then leaned in and whispered in her ear, “close your eyes, relax and don’t open them until I say so. I guarantee you’ll like what you see when you do.”

“…Ok…” she replied tentatively, unsure if this was the right thing to do or not. However, she had a feeling that if she didn’t, she might bolt the second she caught a glimpse of dye. Not because she was scared or didn’t want it, but because she could still feel the volatile bubble of guilt hanging above her head, waiting for the smallest shock to burst and rain down upon her.

“It’s settled then,” Teiko said with bubbling enthusiasm like Kari were a fresh canvas for her to paint on. Which, in all honesty, she was. “I won’t cut your hair as it’s already quite short. However, I’ll layer it slightly and make the ends a bit choppy. It’ll really make the whole thing work. Now, close your eyes.”

Kari did as she was bid. In the darkness, she tried to let go of her guilt-driven misgivings as she felt Teiko spray water onto her hair. She called to mind the opening notes of Tubular bells side one and started playing it from memory. All the while feeling like a rag doll as the stylist tilted her head this way and that and pulled at different parts of her hair. Descending deeper into the music and getting hung up in surprisingly few places, she began to feel less aware as the sounds of the salon drifted further from her comprehension. When her mind had finished its rendition of the first piece of music, she simply started another. While they were too complex for her to recount exactly, her mind did a decent enough job. She had no concept of how much time passed before...

“Ok, you can open your eyes, Kari.”

It took a moment for the girl's voice to register with her. So much so that she felt Teiko tap her on the shoulder. “You can open your eyes now, Kari,” she laughed.

Ok, here goes, Kari said to herself. One, two... she opened her eyes. Her jaw practically hit the checkerboard floor and her eyes widened. She couldn’t believe that the girl in the mirror was her. Her once straight cut chocolate brown hair was now bright orange on top, that faded into yellow and eventually blonde at her now choppy tips. Teiko had made her look like a lit match; exactly what she had said she’d wanted in her excitement.

“So, what do you think?”

“I love it,” she whispered as a tear slipped down her cheek, “thank you.”

She looked over to the waiting area where Tai was standing up. This must have cost him a small fortune. Rubbing the tear from her cheek, she followed Teiko back towards the front of the shop.

“Wow,” Tai breathed, “Kari, you look fantastic. Do you like it?”

Without thinking, she threw her arms around his shoulders, “I love it, but you really shouldn’t have. What about your boots?”

“My old ones will just have to make do for now,” he replied, before turning to Teiko, “you’ve really improved since you butchered my hair,” he laughed.

“No one could butcher that mess,” the girl replied in amusement. She then turned to Kari, “maybe it should be you bringing this one in next time.”

“Maybe I will,” she chuckled.

Both girls turned and grinned evilly at her brother, “I’ve always wondered what you’d look like with short hair, Tai.”

“Me too.”

Her brother glanced between them, a worried expression starting to spread across his face, “my hair’s fine just the way it is!”

“Maybe that won’t be for you to decide,” Teiko then said in a slightly seductive tone that Kari did not like, “you now owe me a favour, Kamiya.”

“Why don’t I pay you and we call it even?”

As Tai reached into his pocket for his wallet, Kari kept her eyes fixed on the turquoise haired girl. Until today, she thought she’d known about all of her brother’s friends. For it had become clear that they were more than just old school acquaintances. Was it possible that they had dated? She made a mental note to enquire at some point. It seemed that Tai had his share of secrets too. She watched her brother pull out his ATM card and hand it over. Moving to stand beside him, she craned her neck to try and see just how much he had spent on her, only Tai seemed to anticipate this and moved to block her view.

Once the transaction had concluded, Teiko held out his receipt and said, “you still owe me that favour, Kamiya.”

Tai took the slip of paper and stored it safely in his wallet where she would not be able to see it, lest she later decide to pickpocket him. Resigned to not finding out, she turned and looked at herself in a full-length mirror that hung on the wall. It was still impossible to comprehend that the girl in the reflection was her. She ran a hand through a few choppy strands that transitioned from orange to yellow to blonde. Their mother would go ballistic when she saw her. Perhaps it was feelings of teenage rebellion stirring within her, but seeing a reflection that now truly looked like herself meant that she did not care. This was the person she wanted to be.

“Ready to go?” Tai asked as he rejoined her.

“Yeah.”

“See you later, Kari,” Teiko said to her before she turned to look at Tai and winked, “I’ll be in touch.”

On that note, the siblings departed the salon, however, not before Kari felt a slight pang of jealousy. It was late afternoon now and the sun had started its slow descent towards the horizon. In a peaceful quiet, they walked to the nearest subway station and boarded the first train heading in the direction of home. Kari sat beside the window and could not help but stare at the partial reflection of herself. Despite her misgivings yesterday, she had thoroughly enjoyed spending the day with Tai without letting her true feelings show. If only she could continue to have such a close relationship with him. Unfortunately, she knew it would inevitably become too painful for her to be around him.

##

It was almost dinner time when Kari and Tai arrived back home. Still elated by her surprise trip to the hair salon, Kari insisted on making dinner. After a quick search through the cupboards and fridge, she cobbled together enough ingredients to make ramen. A singular peak under the lid of the casserole dish that sat in the fridge had been enough to convince her she needed to go shopping tomorrow, lest they want to end up with food poisoning. However, tonight she could make do with what she had. From her position behind the kitchen counter, she could watch her brother lounge on the sofa; he was reading a manga. For now, her high was enough to quash any thought regarding how wrong her current feelings were. Just gazing longingly at her brothers mass of chocolate hair filled her with a desire to go over to him and start rubbing her hands through it. Something primal began to stir inside her as she began adding spices to her broth mix. How she would love to rip Tai’s shirt off and caress his muscular torso. She shuddered at the thought of their naked bodies intertwining as their wandering hands explored each other. It would be exquisite.

The need to slice chicken necessitated that she break off her lustful gaze unless she wished to lose a finger. Eyes now fixed on the poultry, she realised that her breathing had become slightly erratic. It took a long, slow inhale and exhale to help regulate it. She fantasized about Tai often, however, typically when lying underneath the covers of her bed. This was not the time nor place, she reminded herself firmly. She still had the rest of the evening to get through while in her brother's company. If she allowed her imagination such free reign it would lead her to disaster. She kept her eyes focused on the food for the rest of the meal preparations.

When it was eventually time to call Tai to the dinner table, she found her brother ravenous; nothing new there. A small smile formed on Kari’s lips as she watched him practically inhale the ramen. It made her happy to know that he enjoyed her cooking. She ate her own in a more civilised manner and could not help but feel slightly proud at how it had turned out. By the time she had finished, Tai had already consumed seconds and offered to help her clear up.

“So what are we going to listen to?” he asked once the final pans had been dried and put away.

“Let’s go find out,” she replied enthusiastically.

Kari felt a light flutter in her heart, yet at the same time butterflies in her stomach at the thought of sharing something that had come to mean so much to her. This sort of music was not for everyone. What if Tai didn’t like it? Or worse yet, what if he thought it so bad that he began to laugh at her? For a moment the thought of saying she’d changed her mind, taking her new CDs and barricading herself in her room crossed her mind. However, when she picked them up off the coffee table, she felt a hand touch her shoulder.

“Don’t be afraid to share with me. I’d never mock something you care so much about. You know that, right?” Tai said in her ear.

His words instantly dispelled the feelings of doubt that had just snuck up on her. Even if her brother did not like her music, he would not judge her. “I know,” she replied, hoping her tone masked her moment of uncertainty.

He offered her a hand, which she took. His palms felt rough against her smooth ones, however, as his long fingers wrapped themselves around her slender hand she felt a warmth akin to that of being safe inside her room. Tai allowed her to lead him across the apartment and into her bedroom. While they had shared the room for years, once Tai had moved into the old office room, it had quickly become her own personal sanctuary. Somewhere she could hide away from the world and be herself in all her sinful glory. Only you would never be able to tell that by just looking at it. The walls were bare and painted in the same neutral colours they had always been. Her desk surface was neat and the bed made properly. Indeed it looked more like the living quarters of a lone individual in their forties, rather than the bedroom of a sixteen-year-old girl.

“Do you like your room this way?” Tai asked as he followed her inside.

“What’s wrong with it?” she retorted, sounding slightly defensive.

Tai looked her up and down, “it doesn’t exactly feel like the room of a girl that looks like a lit match.”

She bit her lip, knowing that he was completely right. When she failed to answer, he then said, “you really have been keeping yourself bottled up, haven’t you?”

Kari looked down at her feet, “I guess so.”

She felt one of Tai’s index fingers lift her chin up and found herself gazing into those beautiful chocolate brown eyes. He then ran a finger through her hair, “I think the Gatomon’s well and truly out of the bag now,” he smiled, “so where are you hiding your CDs?”

Kari bent down and pulled a small box out from under her bed. Opening it she offered it out to him so he could take a look at the neatly stacked collection of jewel cases. She watched anxiously as he flicked through them.

“How about this one?” he then said, pulling out her copy of Oldfield’s Amarok.

Unable to contain herself, Kari started to laugh. While it had only been a one in six shot, only he could have picked that particular album first time. She shook her head, “unless you want your virgin ears to bleed, not that one.”

Tai laughed, “is it that bad?”

“No. It’s actually quite good. However, it’s very difficult to get into. I didn’t go near it for a week after my first listen!” She was not sure if he quite understood, but that would soon change.

Tai shook his head and smiled, “ why don’t you pick then.”

Kari thought for a moment, her finger sliding over the spines of the CD cases. It was strange, she thought, for her to be the experienced one. To be the one introducing him to something new. Eventually, she opted for the same jumping off point she’d had; Tubular bells. It wasn’t her favourite but captured the essence of the musical style perfectly. If he didn’t like this, he wouldn’t like any of the others.

“Let’s start at the beginning,” she said, pulling the album out of the box. “This is the first one I heard.” She slid her newest additions inside and then closed the lid.

“Sounds good,” Tai replied, “why don’t we go sit in the living room and put it on the Hi-Fi system?”

She glanced over at the small CD player and speakers that sat on her desk. Since her musical preferences had changed, she’d barely used it. Preferring instead to use her mp3 player; it guaranteed privacy. The Hi-Fi in the living room would make the album sound a lot better. “Ok,” she nodded, having to remind herself that they were the only ones in the house. They headed back to the living room where she turned on the stereo and inserted the CD. Sitting down on the sofa she picked up the remote control.

“Any words of wisdom?” Tai asked.

“Close your eyes, relax and try to forget what you think you know about music,” she said with a smile. Following her own advice, she made herself comfortable and pressed play.

Just shy of fifty minutes passed with the music the only sound to fill the room. Being able to listen to the album on a proper Hi-Fi system had been heaven for Kari. When it ended she let out a serene sigh. And she’d thought it had sounded good before. Opening her eyes she glanced over at her brother. Moment of truth time.

“So, what did you think?” she asked tentatively. Like she’d just offered up part of her own soul for him to inspect and pass judgement over.

She watched as Tai opened his own eyes and turned to look at her, “did you feel as though your mind had just been blown and that everything you thought you knew about music was a lie?”

She laughed, “pretty much. I had no clue what I was getting myself into when I bought the album.”

“I only thought classical stuff lasted that long.”

“That was the first thing that got me when I looked at the back of the case and saw it was only two tracks,” Kari replied. While it had blown his mind, she still needed to know if he liked it or not, so she pressed, “so, did you like it?”

A few seconds of silence kept her on the metaphorical edge of her seat before Tai answered, “I think... I actually did. The first part certainly.”

She let out a breath that she’d been unaware of holding. He actually liked it. Her heart fluttered at the thought of the musical adventure they could share. Tonight might just be the start of something wonderful. Inside the back of her head, the now steel reinforced and concrete-clad box that held the alarm bell had just been dumped overboard. Taking with it the part of her brain that, for her own sanity, had decided it was best to distance herself from him.

“The second half gets a little fruity, doesn’t it.”

Tai laughed, “that’s one way of putting it. So, are all his albums like that?”

“Most of the ones I’ve got are. However, he went through a phase of doing more regular songs on some of them.” The elation of having someone to share with was steadily rising and she found herself feeling slightly giddy. “Can we listen to another one?”

“Sure, go for it.”

Kari couldn’t contain herself and practically threw herself on top of Tai, wrapping her arms around his broad shoulders.

Catching him off guard, her brother let out a loud, “WAH! Kari!” as the pair almost fell off of the sofa. When he regained his composure, Tai looked her in the eye, “I don’t think I’ve seen you this animated in a long time.”

She punched him playfully in the arm, “you’ve spent that much time studying I don’t think you’ve seen anything animated for a long time.”

He gave her a mischievous look, “maybe your right. However, since all I’ve got here is you, I guess I’ll just have to make you more animated.”

“Tai don’t you DARE!”

Kari burst into hysterics as, for the second time in as many days, Tai began to tickle her armpits. Squirming in his grip, she futilely tried to free herself only to pitch them both over the edge of the sofa. For the next minute or so, the siblings found themselves locked in a furious wrestling match as they rolled around the floor. Much like they used to when they were kids, typically over who got control of the TV remote. Unfortunately, as was often the case all those years ago, Kari found herself pinned on her back under the sheer weight of her brother. Both were laughing amid panted breaths. When she could see straight once more, she found her face mere inches from Tai’s. Helplessly she became transfixed by his eyes. Those big, beautiful chocolate eyes that held so much warmth that she just wanted to lose herself in them. Without a thought for the consequences, Kari succumbed to her innermost desires. Lifting her head off of the wooden floor she brought her lips up to meet Tai’s and kissed him.


	8. Pt1 08) Speak to me

**Part One: Her Secret**

**Chapter Eight: Speak to me**

Tai panted for breath amidst a bout of laughter as he finally pinned Kari on her back. Through blurry eyes, he could see her red orbs beneath her new lit match hairdo. She really did suit it, however, it was going to take some getting used to. He gave her a loving smile. He’d missed having such a close relationship with her. Before he knew what was happening, Kari pushed her head up towards his and he felt her lips latch on to his own. Stunned, he was unable to do anything as she kissed him. For that was exactly what she had just done. When she lowered her head back to the floor, Tai just stared at her. He had no idea what to say or do. Instead, his eyes locked on to those of his sister. For a brief moment, she looked about as shocked as he felt, as though someone had stabbed them both unawares. However, as the seconds ticked by in the deathly silence of the apartment, he saw the shock turn to horror and then finally to fear.

In a flash, Kari somehow managed to push him off of her and scrambled to her feet. Slightly winded, Tai could only watch as she bolted across the living room and into her bedroom. When he finally managed to take in enough air, he yelled after her, “Kari, wait!” but it was a wasted effort. The door slammed shut with enough force that it was a surprise it had not broken through the frame.

Struggling to his feet, the memory of what had happened only moments ago buzzing around inside his head, he darted over to his sister's door. What on earth had just happened? One second he’d managed to pin her, the next... He could still taste the sweetness from her soft lips on his own. Why on earth had Kari kissed him? And why had she forcibly thrown him aside and bolted? Was she that embarrassed about it? It had been an accident after all. Or some way of her getting the final say after he’d pinned her… Hadn’t it? He knocked lightly on her door. Whatever the reason, they needed to talk about it. Before it had the opportunity to ruin what had been a great day.

“Kari,” he called out when she did not respond. He knocked again, “Kari.”

He took a breath and hesitated before gripping the handle. He’d rather not barge in, but if she wasn’t going to answer then he was left with no other choice. Pulling the handle down he pushed the door, but it wouldn’t open. Damn, she’d locked it. His options had now dwindled to break down the door, yell at her until she responded or wait until she came out. He liked none of those options. While he could easily kick in the door, it would probably scare the hell out of her and land him in serious trouble when his parents got home. Yelling, while not likely to bring his parents down atop him, would not help matters. The last thing Kari needed right now was to think that he was mad at her. That only left the waiting game. Turning around he pressed his back to the door and slid down it into a sitting position.

“Kari,” he said in a calm voice, “I’m not mad at you. Just open the door and we can talk about it.”

Silence.

“If you change your mind, I’ll be right here waiting for you.”

Tai closed his eyes and began to regulate his breathing. In his mind, he kept replaying the incident. The tussle between them that had led to him pinning her. Their shared bout of laughter amidst ragged breaths. The feel of her soft lips as they touched his own. And then the look in her eyes. How it had changed from shock to horror and then to fear. The first made perfect sense, for it had come as a shock to him too. The second was understandable. He was her brother and she’d just kissed him. He could see why she might feel horrified at what she’d done. However, the third puzzled him. Why had she looked so afraid? Was she that worried about how he would react? Did she expect him to yell at her or something to that effect? The question continued to circle around his head as he slowly began to feel his backside go numb from sitting on the wooden floor. If only there was some other way he could reach her. Some other way into her bedr…

Tai leapt to his feet, a half-formed idea still cobbling itself together inside his head. There was another way into her room; the balcony. Darting towards the door to their parent's room, he skidded to a halt in front of the door and practically barrelled through it. I’m coming, Kari, he thought as he reached the door to their balcony. He turned to his left and saw his goal. His parent's room was directly beside Kari’s and so too the respective balcony’s. He walked over to the edge. There was a gap of about four or five feet between them. He could jump that. Deep inside, Tai felt his courage glow. It was his defining trait after all. If there was danger involved when trying to save someone he cared about, he would find the strength to overcome it. This time it was Kari, his sister, the person he cared about the most. Without further hesitation, he climbed up onto the edge of his parent's balcony. Fortunately, no one else was outside to witness his daring feet.

Taking a deep breath, he propelled himself forward. Clearing the opposite edge, he landed on the ground with a heavy thud that surely would have drawn her attention. He turned his head and stared through the glass. Kari was huddled on the floor with her back against the bedframe. As expected, his landing had drawn her attention. Her red eyes, usually so bright and full of light, were puffy and the rims now a matching colour. One simple glance was enough for him to see how distraught she looked. He could also see that tears still clung to her cheeks in two wet lines that snaked their way down her face. The sight was too much for him to bear. Seeing his sister in so much pain and anguish felt agonising. Instinctively, he gave her a soft smile as he stood up. Reaching out a hand he slid the glass door open and stepped inside her room.

##

Kari looked into her brothers chocolate eyes and could see the shock her kiss had elicited in him. What had she done? While the simple answer was obvious, it was the ramifications of her actions that bombarded her mind. How could she have lost control like that and kissed him? That did not matter now. Oh god, what would Tai think? How would he react once the shock wore off? Images from her nightmares flooded Kari’s mind and she realised that she could not bear to find out. Adrenaline pumping through her system, her primal fight or flight instinct kicked in and she found the strength to shove Tai off of her. Scrambling to her feet she bolted from the living room, never turning her head to look back at her brother. She heard him call after her, but she did not have the mental capacity to discern whether he sounded angry or concerned. She just had to get away from him.

Reaching her bedroom door, she flung it open, stumbled across the threshold, then slammed it shut. There was a faint click as she locked the door, but to Kari, it sounded like a heavy iron bolt being slid across and sealing her inside her prison. For this was where she would have to stay. As she could not stand to face Tai as he denounced her as this wicked, sinful, degenerate creature that should be shunned by everyone for her diseased and depraved mind. Staggering a few steps forward, Kari collapsed to the floor and huddled herself against the edge of her bed frame. Tears began to run down her cheeks, like water from a mountain top that would someday flow into a river. Her skin felt cold like she had been dunked in a bathtub full of ice. And inside her head, she could feel the little creatures that were the manifestation of her darkest thoughts start to gnaw.

How could she have been so stupid as to trust herself around Tai for an entire day? If she had not succumbed to her own lust for his attention this would never have happened. All she had needed to do was say no to him and kept herself inside her room for the duration of the weekend. Sure he would have felt bummed out about it, but at least it would have spared him from the dark truth that was surely well formed inside his head now. Or better yet, she should have plucked up the courage to kill off what remained of their sibling relationship, even if it had made him hate her. Only one of the voices chose that moment to twist the knife. _“You would have hurt him simply to protect yourself. And you’re supposed to be in love with him. Your pathetic, Kari Kamiya. A pathetic, worthless excuse for a human being. You deserve each and every horrible thing he has to say to you.”_

The voice inside her head continued its relentless assault on her and there was nothing Kari could do to stop it. Helpless, she felt herself being dragged down to the bottom of the black hole of despair. So absorbed in her own swirling pit of self-loathing, she was completely oblivious to the fact that Tai was talking to her from the other side of the door.

“Please... stop,” Kari pleaded in a desperate whisper. As though it was someone or something other than her own head that was torturing her.

_“Why? Why should I stop? This is your fault, Kari Kamiya. You and your wicked, sinful, twisted thoughts. You created me.”_

“I...I...” her voice was barely audible, the broken whisper of someone pleading to escape a fate they knew was inevitable, “I... never meant for this to happen.”

_“Never meant for what to happen,”_ the voice hissed, _“never meant to fall in love with your own brother, your own flesh and blood? You’re deplorable, Kari Kamiya, a wretched creature that’s created all her own misery. Not to mention the people you’ve hurt along the way.”_

“I… I… I… never wanted to hurt anyone.”

_“But you did anyway. You remember the look in TK’s eyes when you broke his heart. You led that poor boy along like a puppet on a string for an entire year, making him believe you loved him, before ripping his heart out. All because you wanted to hide from your own depravity.”_

“No,” Kari cried, “it wasn’t like that. I thought I could...”

_“Thought you could what?” _the voice cut in, _“thought you could learn to love him the way you do Tai? Were you really that naive? Did you honestly think you could make yourself fall in love with some surrogate? You're pathetic!”_

“No... I... I...”

_“Then there was the big fight. Four boys beating the hell out of each other. And all because of you. You’re the reason the DigiDestined can no longer get together. You’re the reason Tai can’t hang out with his two best friends. Did you ever think about that? You ruined two of your brother's friendships all because he had to take your side.”_

“I never asked him to.”

_“But that’s what you wanted. To have your courageous brother leap in and save you. For him to profess his love for you and take you away to somewhere the two of you could live happily ever after.” _The voice let out a cruel laugh that chilled Kari to her core. _“I’ll admit, it’s a nice dirty little fantasy. Shame it’ll never be true. He hates you now, Kari. Do you hear me? Tai hates...”_

“SHUT UP!” Kari yelled, her fingernails digging into a patch of skin that was accessible through one of the rips in her jeans. Her body physically shook and her eyes were wide.

From outside she heard a loud thud. Her head turned to look out the glass doors that led to her bedroom balcony. She could not believe what she saw, Tai. How had he... it didn’t matter. Her brother had come. Except she had no idea if he were to be her saviour or her condemner.

##

Slowly, in a manner to how one might approach a terrified animal, Tai crossed the distance between the balcony door and where his sister sat. Gently, he sat down on the floor beside her. She shrank away slightly but did not try to leave; always a good start. He opened his mouth to say something, only to realise that he had no idea what it should be. Eventually, after failing to come up with anything better, he decided to use the somewhat idiotic, but decidedly neutral, “Kari, are you ok?”

She didn’t reply, simply kept staring at him with those eyes so full of fear and despair. He waited for a few moments before trying again, “Kari, please talk to me. Whatever’s wrong, please let me help.” When this too failed to elicit any sort of response, he reached out his arm to wrap around her shoulders.

Immediately she shrank away from him again, “Tai... please... don’t,” she whispered in a voice so fragile that he was surprised he’d even been able to hear it. “Please... just leave me be.”

The feelings of pain and anguish that his sister was radiating were almost too much for him the bear. It had only been one kiss. A momentary lapse of reason on her part certainly, but surely not enough to result in this. There was no doubt in Tai’s mind that he had to stay. He had to find out what was wrong with her and try to help her. “I’m sorry, Kari, but I can’t leave you like this. I care about you too much just to walk away. But you need to let me help you.”

No sooner had the words escaped his mouth, Kari burst into tears. Instinctively, he reached out and pulled her into a hug. She did not resist this time, however, he suspected that she simply lacked the energy to do so. Arms wrapped around her shaking body, Tai began to gently rub her back. “It’s going to be ok,” he whispered in her ear.

How long passed before Kari next spoke, he did not know. When eventually she broke the silence the first thing she said was, “Tai, I’m so sorry. Please just leave me. I don’t deserve to have you here.”

“Kari... how can you possibly think that. You’re the kindest, most selfless person I know.”

“No, I’m not,” she cried, her voice full of anguish. “I’m a horrible, depraved creature that deserves nothing but misery.”

Tai could not believe what his sister had just said. “Kari, you’re not horrible and you’re not depraved. How can you possibly think that about yourself.”

Kari pulled herself away from his chest and looked him straight in “Because I love you!” she wailed.

A look of confusion spread across Tai’s face. “I love you too, Kari. I’m your brother. I’ll always love you,” he said, trying to reassure her, though about what he did not know.

Kari shook her head, “you don’t understand! I don’t love you like a sister, I’m **in** love with you.”

Tai’s mouth fell open and his chocolate eyes widened as he listened to his sister's confession. Was she serious? It certainly sounded like it. But how could she possibly be **in **love with him? “Kari...” he stammered, struggling to find words to convey his disbelief.

“I’m so sorry you ever had to find out, Tai,” Kari cried as fresh tears began to dampen her cheeks. “Do you understand now? I’m a horrible, depraved individual?”

“Kari... when... how... why...?” he stuttered, unable to properly articulate any of the questions that flooded his mind. He had no idea what to think or feel about this revelation. His own sister in love with him. Impossible.

She looked down at the floor, “two years ago. That’s when I realised I’d fallen in love with you.”

No matter how many times she said it, Tai still found it difficult to comprehend. How could his sister have fallen in love with him? While he certainly did not consider himself ugly, he would never have ranked himself amongst the best-looking guys in his school. And he had a tendency to screw up and say the wrong thing when talking to girls. So what could Kari, his brilliant and beautiful sister, who could practically pick any boy she wanted, possibly see in him?

“It all started at one of Yolei’s sleepovers. Everyone was talking about boys they liked and your name popped up. We talked about you for a bit and I said I thought you were cute. I got a few funny looks but no one said anything. The next week in school, someone brought in a magazine with one of those ‘who’s your perfect guy’ quizzes. When I finished my turn I realised that I had just described you.” She took a pause for breath, but he chose not to interrupt. He needed to hear the full story. “Over the next few weeks, I kept catching myself thinking about you. I tried to make the thoughts go away, tried desperately to think about other guys, but my mind always kept coming back to you.”

When Kari finished speaking, Tai searched her eyes for any hint that she might close down again. He took a calming breath to steady himself and decided it did not matter how he felt, at least not just now. This must be unbelievably difficult for her he thought, feeling a pang of sorrow for her. To have carried this secret for two whole years must have been unbearable. At that moment he started to think back over everything that had happened in that time. Like a jigsaw he’d only just found the picture for, the pieces started to slot into place.

“Your relationship with TK,” he eventually said, casting his mind back to what he theorised must be the start, “what really happened?”

Kari looked slightly confused for a moment and he wondered if she was having trouble processing his reaction. Indeed, it had seemed like she’d expected him to find her deplorable and thus treat her as such. He didn’t, or at least he didn’t think he did. For he was not entirely sure what he felt, the revelation still not having fully been processed by his mind.

Eventually, Kari answered, “I knew he was going to ask me out a few weeks before he managed to work up the courage to do so. Because everyone expected us to get together I thought it might help. I thought that if I was with someone else, I wouldn’t think about you and that I would learn to love them.”

More tears followed her words and Tai reached out and took one of her pale, cold hands in his own. “What happened?”

“Everything was fine to start with, I even enjoyed myself when we spent time together. However, when he kissed for the first time I felt all of his love and passion, but none of my own. I knew then that I could not love him. Every time he kissed me after that, I kept imagining what it would be like if it was you. When he tried to give me that promise ring on our anniversary, I knew I had to end it. Even though it meant breaking his heart.”

“That must have been a horrible situation to be in,” Tai said sympathetically. “Though I can see why TK took it so hard. Especially since you couldn’t tell him the truth.”

“I know. It was the hardest decision I ever had to make...” Kari paused to wipe the tears from her eyes. “It’s my fault you all ended up fighting and that the group can’t get together anymore. That’s why I’m such a horrible person. I used TK to try and escape my own feelings and then broke his heart. Which then resulted in so many friendships shattering.”

Tai absorbed this new information, but in the end, decided it changed nothing. TK had still been out of line when he laid his hands on her and even knowing the truth, he would do the same thing all over again. Regardless of who it was, Kari was still his little sister. “It wasn’t your fault, Kari. Irrespective of the reason for breaking up with him, TK should never have acted the way he did.”

She shook her head and Tai knew from experience that she would blame herself no matter what he said. “After that, I was angry at TK and poor Davis was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. I thought that since he was a lot like you, it might work. We had a lot of fun over the few weeks we were together, but it transpired that we were too destructive as a couple.”

“I recall you getting in trouble at school, but thought it was because you were still hurting over TK. What else did you guys do?”

“I’d rather not go there,” Kari replied, her tone telling Tai that she did not wish to recall those memories.

“So what happened then?”

“It was becoming difficult to be around you, intoxicating. Every time I was near you I wanted to touch you, kiss you... I decided that I needed to distance myself from you as much as possible. I withdrew into myself, lost all my friends and eventually sought solace in the new music I’d discovered. It became my outlet, my safe place. Somewhere I could go to escape the sinful thoughts that plagued my mind.”

“And I ended up too bogged down with school work and soccer practice to notice that you were changing and slowly slipping away until...”

“...until mom and dad decided to go away for the weekend and you had time to properly think about me,” Kari finished for him. Her facial expression, that had neutralised somewhat while she told her story, began to look fearful again. She lowered her head, “I’m so sorry, Tai. I hoped you’d never have to find out. I was just so happy having spent the day with you that I kept ignoring the warning signs and eventually lost control. I know that you’ll hate me and I understand that you’ll think me to be a sick, twisted degenerate. So please just get it over with and leave me be.”

A look of shock spread across Tai’s face as he listened to how Kari expected him to react. The look of despair had returned to her beautiful red eyes and he could again feel her pain and anguish. He knew at that moment that he could never do anything that would hurt her. Yes, he had always told himself that, but now he categorically knew it to be true.

“I don’t hate you, Kari,” he said in a calm, steady voice, “I could never hate you.”

He watched as doubt and confusion slowly replaced the fear and despair in his sister's eyes. It seemed like it was now her turn to be stunned into silence.

“And I don’t think you’re sick, twisted or any of the other horrible things you’ve said about yourself.”

“Tai…” she whispered as deep within her eyes he could see a faint speck of light amidst the darkness.

Tai pulled his sister into another hug. This time her weak arms wrapped around his torso. It felt like time stood still for a moment as the siblings embraced. However, he knew the conversation had not ended and he did not know how Kari might react or what effect his next words might have on her.

“I love you, Kari, and I always will.” He moved his head so that he could look her in the eyes. “I can’t imagine how hard it must have been for you to keep this secret all this time. But it’s over now. You don’t have to carry it alone or shut yourself away anymore. I’ll always be here for you.”

It was joy laced with sorrow that filled those brilliant red eyes now. “But you’re not in love with me,” Kari then said. It was an odd emotion in her voice that Tai heard and he was not sure he knew a word for it. There was a sense of relief that he had not denounced her as a degenerate. Then gratitude for his insistence that he would always be there for her. But also sorrow and longing for something she now knew for certain she would never have.

Tai had never been good at relationship stuff. His utter failure to read and act on the signs from Sora had driven her to Matt. A short list of other would be’s or didn’t last long’s had all been snuffed out because of his inability to understand their feelings. Yet here he sat, having to try and figure out a way of letting his sister down gently. Something he had failed miserably at on the scant occasions that it had been him breaking off the relationship.

Eventually, he took what he perceived to be the softest, but in actuality may have been the cowards, way out, “I don’t think so,” he said, trying to sound compassionate but also detecting an unexpected hint of regret in his own tone. Was he genuinely sorry that he could not return her feelings?

Kari lowered her head, “I understand.”

What did he say now? Given that his past experiences had ended with girls storming off, he was unsure what to say other than, ‘wait that didn’t come out right’. He reached out a finger and raised her chin so that she was looking at him once more. “If you ever need to talk, please come find me,” he paused as his eyes took in her flaming hair, “and, Kari, don’t shut yourself away from the world and pretend to be someone you’re not.”

She gave him a smile that, though weak, he knew to be genuine. And for the first time in a long time, he knew that she would be ok. “Thank you, Tai,” Kari said as she reached over and gave him a soft kiss. For her sake, he did not resist. When her tender lips touched his own, he could feel warmth and love that he had never known before. This must be what it felt like when someone who was genuinely in love with you kissed you. When eventually she broke it off, Tai was left completely unsure of what had just happened.

“I think I need to be alone now,” Kari then said as she withdrew from their embrace, “and, Tai, please don’t tell anyone.”

“I would never do that to you, Kari,” he replied as he got to his feet.

Her hand touched his own and he could feel it linger until he made for the door. Unlocking it, he took one last look at his sister before exiting her room and closing it behind him.


	9. Pt1 Epilogue: Signs of life

**Part One: Her Secret**

**Epilogue: Signs of life**

Kari sat alone in the dying light of her bedroom. Everything that had just happened felt like a total train wreck, yet at the same time completely liberating. Her heart rate and breathing had both stabilised and her body no longer felt like it was carved from ice. She did not know how long it had been since Tai had left her, but what she did know was that everything would be ok now. Her secret was out. Her brother knew and he had not condemned her. It felt kind of funny, she mused. She’d spent two years trying to suppress her feelings. Distancing herself from him and hiding away from the world. All the while allowing her own thoughts to turn against her and gnaw at her psyche. To create this nightmare scenario wherein her own brother demonised her. Only for the opposite to be true. Instead of yelling about how depraved she was, Tai had been compassionate. He had listened to her story. Understood how painful it had been for her. And in the end, accepted how she felt.

A small laugh escaped from Kari’s lips. Ironically, it had been her own faith that had been found wanting. For if she had trusted in Tai, she could have told him two years ago and avoided all the anguish and pain that she’d suffered. She sighed. None of that mattered anymore. While her brother had been understanding and offered his support, he had not returned her feelings. Or, to use his own words, he didn’t think so. What had he meant by that, she wondered? While the obvious interpretation was no he didn’t, Kari could not help but feel the tiniest bit hopeful. She knew she shouldn’t. That she should just accept that, while he understood how she felt and would support her in any way he could, he would never feel the same way about her. Yet it was there nonetheless. Like someone had closed the door, but for some reason, the latch had not clicked.

With difficulty, Kari lifted herself up of the floor and back onto her feet. Her legs shook as she took a step, but she remained upright. The events of the evening had left her seriously drained, however, she knew that she would not sleep. Her mind was still racing and needed time to settle. She walked over to her desk, picked up her mp3 player and slipped her headphones on over her ears. She turned and caught sight of herself in the mirrored door of the wardrobe. A thin smile spread over her lips as she gazed at her lit match hair. Before today, she could not recall the last time she’d genuinely felt good about herself. This was Kari Kamiya. A girl who had fallen in love with her brother but no longer felt the crushing weight of guilt, shame or self-loathing. Now that she had told Tai, she started to feel all the negative emotions that had plagued her for so long, begin to slip away.

Turning to her balcony door, she slid it open and stepped out into the mild night air. Flicking through the albums on her mp3 player she found The Songs of Distant Earth and hit play. She needed time to calm down, for her emotions to settle and her mind to reorganise itself. As the music began she took in a deep breath of the fresh Odaiba air. And for the first time in two years, felt a glimmer of hope for her future.

##

When the door to Kari’s bedroom clicked shut behind him, Tai let out a long exhale. The conversation he had just had with his sister surely had to be the most emotionally charged and difficult of his entire life. And he had no idea where to begin sorting through it in his head. Body on autopilot, he made his way to the fridge and withdrew a can of soda. It opened with a hiss and he downed half the contents in one long gulp. The only sound to be heard in the apartment was that of his feet on the wooden floor as he walked to his room and closed the door.

Tai sat down on the edge of his bed, not bothering to turn on a light. Absentmindedly, he swirled the remained of the soda around inside its can. So… Kari had fallen in love with him two years ago… The idea of it still boggled his mind, but he’d been forced to accept it. What did this mean?

_“That she loves you, idiot,”_ a voice in the back of his head said. _“If you’d bothered to pay any attention to her over the past year, you might have figured it out and been able to spare her some of her pain.”_

It was a sobering thought. If he’d not been so self-absorbed with his own issues, he would surely have noticed something was wrong with her a lot sooner and possibly been able to get the truth out of her. It certainly shed new light on everything that had happened over the past two years. He shook his head. That didn’t matter now. The important thing was that he now knew and could offer Kari whatever support she needed.

As he sat alone in the darkness, the question he had pushed to the back of his mind since the moment she had told him, floated to the surface. Is it wrong? Should he have told her so and that she needed to purge herself of her feelings towards him? Society would certainly say so. For he knew that incest was considered taboo. However, the majority would probably agree that you could not help who you fell in love with. Was the argument that, love is love, not one that same-sex relationship activists cited? Did that apply in this instance? He did not know the answer to that. What he did know, was that it was his little sister's feelings that he was dealing with. And no matter what, he could never do anything to hurt her.

Tai took a sip from his soda can. Something else about the exchange was still bugging him. Why had he not been more concrete when telling her that he did not return her feelings? Surely it would have been better to have been definitive with her, instead of giving her a half-baked no and leaving her with potential false hope? His mind then wandered to the kiss she had given him before he had left. She’d moved slowly enough that he could have stopped her. Yet he had offered up no resistance. He could recall with perfect clarity, the feeling of her soft lips embracing his own. The love and warmth that had been present in that brief moment. How he had never felt anything like it before.

No, Tai thought firmly. Regardless of how Kari might have felt, she was still his little sister. The person whom he had shared a bedroom with for fourteen years. Who he’d laughed and argued with. Shared so many happy memories as well as some sad ones. The person that he’d almost killed as a child because of his selfish desire to play soccer. Who from that day on he’d sworn to always look out for and protect. His brilliant, beautiful sister, whom he always found himself telling his short-lived girlfriends about. The girl that he cared about and loved more than anyone else…

The soda can slipped out of Tai’s hand and landed on the wooden floor with a low metallic thunk. He didn’t even notice. His eyes were wide as they stared through the wall in front of them. A sheen of cold sweat had formed on his forehead, the colour drained from his face and his facial expression contorted to look like he had just taken a surprise knife to the stomach. No… that couldn’t be… it wasn’t possible… he couldn’t be in love with Kari… could he?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for taking the time to read this story and I hope you enjoyed it. If so then I would really love to hear from you in a review. This is the end, for now, however, I am in the process of writing part two and will hopefully finish it in the next few weeks. Thanks once again and hopefully I'll see you all soon.
> 
> Regards
> 
> Niaxi


	10. Pt2 01) Coming back to life

**Part Two: His Secret**

**Chapter One: Coming back to life**

The sun shone through the sliding glass doors of Kari Kamiya’s bedroom and over the bedsheets to where the bearer of light lay sound asleep. When she rolled over a particular bright ray caught the corner of her eye, causing it to flicker open. “Huh?” she said in confusion as she glanced around to find that she was in her own bed. A deflated sigh escaped from her lips. She’d had the dream in which she confessed her love to Tai again. Only last night it had been different, longer… much longer. They had gone shopping together; much like they planned to do today. He had bought her some CDs, they had gone to h.NAOTO and then he’d bought her lunch and ice cream. Afterwards, he’d surprised her by taking her to a hair salon, where his friend, Teiko, had styled her hair so it looked like a lit match. She had loved it. Back home she had made dinner and then they’d sat on the couch together and listened to Tubular bells; one of her favourite albums. She’d been so happy that while they had been wrestling around on the floor, she had kissed him. The aftermath had been horrible she recalled. Having fled to her bedroom, her darkest thoughts had found their voice and attacked her viciously. Tai had then come in via her balcony and sat down beside her. During a long conversation she had told him the truth; that she was in love with him. However, unlike the prevalent version in which he demonised her and the rare one where he professed his love for her, this time he had been understanding and comforting. He’d accepted how she felt, even if he did not return her feelings. It had been liberating.

Sitting up, Kari found her headphones lying atop the sheets beside her head. That was odd. Had she fallen asleep while listening to her music? She glanced at her alarm clock; 9:03 am. For her that was late. Had she turned into Tai overnight? Granted, for once she felt quite well-rested. The nightmare version of her dream had been waking her quite a lot recently. Climbing out of bed she walked over to the desk and sat her headphones and mp3 player down on its surface. She turned around only for her mouth to fall open at the sight of her reflection in the wardrobe door mirror. Her hair looked like a lit match! It wasn’t just a dream. All of it had actually happened. A wide smile formed on her face. Not only did her hair look awesome, but Tai now knew the truth and had not demonised her. She could now recall climbing into bed with her headphones on and that she had listened to at least three albums. It must have been well after two in the morning before she fell asleep. No wonder she had not woken before now.

For the first time in two years, Kari left her bedroom feeling genuinely happy. Was this the way she used to feel when she woke up in the morning? It had been so long that she honestly couldn’t remember. Regardless, it felt good. A quick scan of the apartment told her that Tai was still asleep. After waking up at eight o’clock yesterday, her brother would probably not surface until after ten. In the bathroom, she had to root around in the cupboard under the sink to find a shower cap before stepping inside the cubical. She’d wanted her hair to look like this for so long that she wished to ensure it stayed that way for as long as possible. After showering, she returned to her bedroom to dress.

Today she pulled on a short red tartan skirt and the t-shirt she had bought the previous day from h.NAOTO; it was black with scrawled red writing all over it. Her other purchase, a black choker, also got a debut. Standing in front of the mirror she drank in her reflection and laughed. She was going to develop a complex if she kept doing that. However, something was still not right with her outfit. She pondered for a moment before picking up her school bag. A brief rummage later and she found what she was looking for. Pulling out the smooth wooden pendant she traced the etched pink star with her finger before slipping the cord over her head. She’d worn it for the longest time, before throwing it across the room after a particularly bad day had left her feeling like it was a cruel joke. It had been lost until she’d went hunting for that pen drive on Friday. She took one last cursory look in the mirror and nodded her head; perfect.

From under her bed, she fetched her CD box and withdrew her three new albums. Over at her desk, she opened her laptop and set one of them to rip while she made breakfast. Making her way into the kitchen, she made herself a bowl of cereal and found some raspberries in the fridge to put on top of it. She took it and a glass of orange juice back to her bedroom and sat down at her desk. The first CD was only halfway done as she chewed the first mouthful of cereal. In the peaceful quiet of her bedroom, she ate her breakfast whilst copying all of her new music to her mp3 player. She felt giddy with excitement at having three new albums to digest. Especially since one of them was by a brand new artist and she had no idea what to expect other than Iowa’s assertion that it was something special. When everything had finished transferring she pocketed her music player and picked up her headphones. The walk to the store to buy some groceries with which to make dinner would give her the perfect opportunity to listen to one of them. She’d just have to decide which.

Leaving her bedroom once more she was slightly surprised that Tai had not surfaced. Thinking it best to check up on him before she went out, Kari crossed over to his room and knocked on the door. “Tai,” she called out but received no response. She rolled her eyes. Between their eating and sleeping habits, it was no wonder her brother and his Digimon partner were made for each other. Opening the door she stepped inside and immediately frowned. Tai lay asleep face down atop his bed, still wearing yesterday’s clothes. A can of soda lay on the floor in a pool of its own contents. What on earth, she thought as he reached out a hand to give him a shake. It looked like he’d completely crashed out last night. “Tai, are you ok?”

Her brother groaned as he raised his head, “urgh.” He then turned in her general direction. “Kari?” he asked in confusion.

She laughed, “over here, Tai,” and waved her hand in front of his face.

“What time is it?” he asked, his voice still sounding groggy.

“Time you got out of bed,” Kari said in a no-nonsense tone. “However, you don’t seem to have managed to get into bed last night so...”

Tai’s eyes finally managed to locate her, “what?”

“Sit up and take a look.”

She watched with amusement as her brother struggled to prop himself up on his hands. His hair was all tousled and he looked exceptionally cute. Eventually, he managed to look down at himself and his look of confusion deepened. “What happened to me last night?” he asked though she could tell he was talking more to himself.

Kari chuckled again, “before or after you leapt from mom and dads balcony to mine?” As she watched him it became obvious that his brain was still trying to process everything. “Tell you what, I’ll go fix you some breakfast while you come to your senses. After which I need to go out.”

Tai nodded his head in appreciation, but even when he mumbled, “thanks,” it was clear that he wasn’t all there yet.

Playfully Kari ruffled his hair before heading for the door. “And watch out for the puddle of soda on the floor,” she said by way of a parting gesture.

From out in the hall she heard him say, “what soda?”

“The one you spilt last night,” she called out as she entered the kitchen.

Kari put a pot of coffee on to boil while she cracked some eggs into a bowl. Adding some butter, milk and seasoning, she then whisked them until the yokes and whites had properly mixed. Heating a frying pan on the stove, she added a splash of oil followed by the mixture. It cooked slowly while she quickly grated some cheese, chopped half an onion and the last of a packet of cooked ham. When the underside had started to brown, she added the extra ingredients, waited until the cheese had fully melted and the onion cooked, then folded it over twice.

“Tai, breakfast’s ready,” she called as she plated up the omelette and poured a mug of coffee from the pot. Today she took pity on him and added the milk and sugar for him. She then sat both on the table along with a glass of fresh orange juice.

Tai appeared from his room still looking bleary-eyed and wearing yesterday’s clothes. He staggered over to the table and sat down with a heavy thud in his chair. “Thanks, Kari.”

She gave him a smile, “don’t mention it. Now I’m going out to get some groceries or it’ll be mom’s abomination for dinner.”

Her brother visibly shuddered and almost spilt his coffee. “Take care of yourself,” he said before taking a mouthful.

“I will,” she replied as she headed for the front door.

Putting on her mismatched converse she slipped her headphones on and left the apartment. Outside she immediately felt the suns warmth and looked up to see a pale blue sheet with only the smallest wisps of white. Like yesterday, today seemed as though it was going to be another good day. By the time she reached the stairs she already had her mp3 player in hand and was flicking through her new albums. In the end, she settled on the ironic choice; Oldfield’s Crises. For as of today, she felt like hers had finally come to an end.


	11. Pt2 02) Take it back

**Part Two: His Secret**

**Chapter Two: Take it back**

The strong smell of coffee engulfed Tai Kamiya’s nostrils as he listened to the apartment door click shut. He felt like a complete and utter zombie this morning… or at least more so than usual. Still dressed in yesterday’s clothes, his mass off chocolate hair was a tousled mess and felt greasy to the touch. After breakfast, he seriously needed to take a shower. In fact, had it not been for the cup currently held close to his mouth, he would probably be able to smell that need. Taking another drink he turned his attention to the plate in front of him. It seemed that Kari must have been taking pity on him as she’d gone to the trouble of making him an omelette.

At least last night seemed to have had a positive effect on her, he mused as he took his first bite; delicious. For she’d seemed genuinely happy before she left. He also suspected that she’d slept far better than he had. Casting his mind back to last night he could not remember how late it had been when he eventually keeled over. He just knew that he had sat on the edge of his bed in stunned silence for a very long time. Focusing his attention on his breakfast, he tried to force all thoughts of last night and Kari to the back of his head to be dealt with when he was more awake. It worked for a while, but by the time he was eating the last bites of his omelette and draining his glass of orange juice, his sister had managed to creep back into his mind via a moment when he pondered what she might make for dinner. A rather stealthy tactic he had to admit.

Rising from the table, Tai made a b-line for the bathroom. Stripping out of his rumpled clothes, he climbed inside the shower cubical. The jet of cold water that hit him in the face served to wake up the last part of his brain that was still asleep. It took a few moments for it to reach a suitable temperature. Under the warm jet of the shower, his brain began the process of sorting out the train wreck that was his memories of the previous night. Kari had kissed him then barricaded herself inside her bedroom. He’d then jumped onto her balcony from his parents one and proceeded to comfort her. She had then confessed to having fallen in love with him two years ago.

Tai let out a low breath and picked up the shampoo bottle. That had been the bombshell alright. Kari, his little sister, was in love with him. The revelation had stunned him completely and left him unsure how to feel. Having seen how distraught she was and upon hearing what she thought he would think of her, he had made the decision that his feelings on the subject did not matter at that point in time. Kari had needed compassion and understanding, which was exactly what he had given her. Fast forward to this morning and it seemed to have worked; given how happy she had seemed. And he had no intention of pulling the rug out from under her feet now. If she needed him, he would be there for her. No, the real cause for concern had come in the form his tentative let down and… the second kiss. Perhaps Kari had wanted to prove her point or maybe even to know what it felt like to kiss him properly just once. Regardless, he had not resisted and experienced something he had never felt before.

Lathering his hair with shampoo, Tai thrust his head back under the water and began to rinse the now soapy mass. The memory of the love and warmth he had felt in the brief moment when their lips had been in contact floated to the surface of his mind. He could still recall the detail with perfect clarity.

_“So what now?” _a slightly hissed voice from the depths of his mind queried. _“You know the revelation you discovered while sitting all alone in your bedroom.” _

I was just being reactionary, Tai thought firmly, dismissing the voice. I had no idea what to think. I didn’t want to hurt Kari and I simply invented some crazy notion about being in love with her too because I want her to be happy.

_“If you say so,” _the voice replied in a mocking tone._ “You’re the boss after all.”_

“I do.”

Finished rinsing his hair, Tai quickly scrubbed his body and turned the water off. Taking a towel from the rack, he dried himself thoroughly before picking up his clothes to toss into the laundry hamper. However, by the time he made it to his bedroom, his brain had started playing back snippets from last night. He tried to ignore it as he dressed in a pair of brown three-quarter length cargo trousers and a blue t-shirt with yellow trim. Sitting down at his desk he turned on his laptop and opened up an internet browser. Without really knowing what he was doing or what he wanted to find, he started searching for information regarding incestuous relationships in Japan. After a bit of reading, he found himself to be rather surprised at how liberal his country was compared to most on the matter. Not only was it not illegal, but it had quite a presence in popular culture, specifically in Shojo anime and manga. Something he had never bothered with given that its target audience was teenage girls.

Regardless of what he’d just read, that still did not make it right… did it? He shook his head. Why was he even looking at this? Kari was his sister and while she might be in love with him, he did not feel the same way about her. End of story. Making sure to clear his browser history he closed his laptop over. In a few days, things would have settled down. Kari would hopefully still be happy and they would be able to go back to having a relationship like they used to. Until then he needed a distraction. Looking around his room his eyes came to rest on his video game collection; perfect. Walking over to his bookcase he ran a finger along the edge of a shelf as he pondered what to play. He should probably pick something that was two-player in case Kari wanted to join him when she got back from the store, he mused as he started ruling games out one by one. He felt slightly dismayed when he had to reject Metroid Prime, but it would be quite douchey of him to exclude his sister. Especially after she had made him breakfast and gone shopping so he wouldn’t have to suffer the unidentifiable abomination that lurked in the fridge. However, the game next to it would be perfect; Mario Kart Double Dash!

Taking the game off the shelf, he gathered together the various parts of his GameCube and carted it through to the living room. After a few moments, he had it hooked up to the TV and the disc inserted. When the title screen booted up, he could not help but smile. While they’d not played this iteration much, Mario Kart 64 had been a virtual battleground for them growing up. One on which he never lost without choosing to. Still, it had been a while since he had last played, better ease off the rust before Kari got home.

The video game did what he had intended it to do and he had become quite engrossed by the time his sister arrived home. So much so that he did not even hear her come in.

“What you up to, Tai?”

Tai jumped while at the same time trying to turn around to see the assailant, causing him to fall off the sofa and land on the wooden floor with a heavy thud. From his new position, he heard Kari burst into a fit of hysterics, while his hard-fought first place was evaporated by a blue shell of death. With difficulty, largely due to the fact he was wedged between the sofa and coffee table, he pulled himself to his feet.

“That was not funny, Kari,” he said hotly, giving her a stern look.

It had the opposite effect as his sister’s laughter intensified. He watched as she clung to the back of the sofa for support. Her attire today, red tartan skirt with a black t-shirt and choker, gave her an altogether different look from yesterday, but one that she still suited. Around her neck, he also did not fail to notice she wore her crest of light pendant.

When she eventually settled down, Kari replied, “you’re right, Tai. It wasn’t funny, it was hilarious.”

A sour expression formed on his face but quickly melted at the sight of his sister's cute smile. Apparently, her get out of trouble look worked on him too, for he soon found himself smiling. “So what did you get for dinner?” he asked, the sight of the grocery bags she held only just reminding him why she went out in the first place.

“That is a surprise,” Kari replied as she headed for the kitchen. He followed her only to have her turn and hold a hand out in a stop gesture when she crossed the threshold. “The kitchen’s out of bounds until after dinner.”

“But what if I want a snack?” he asked in confusion.

“Then you’ll just have to ask me nicely to go and get it for you.”

“But…”

“No buts,” she said firmly, “unless you want to be eating mom’s kitchen nightmare for dinner.”

He gulped at how serious she made the threat sound. He searched her eyes for any hint that it was a bluff. Holly crap she was serious. Involuntarily he backed away from her outstretched hand. “Ok, Kari, whatever you say,” he said with a forced laugh as he rubbed the back of his head.

“Good boy,” Kari replied with a devilish grin, “now go sit on the sofa and I’ll join you once I’ve put this stuff away.”

Tai did as he was told and went back to the sofa. Picking up his gamepad he went about setting up another race. He shot a glance over to the kitchen. Well, you were the one who told her to be herself, his brain reminded him. Perhaps he’d made a slight error in judgement when he’d told her that. This Kari had an evil streak. After only one race, his sister sat down beside him.

“Can I play?” she asked sweetly, her tone unnerving him slightly.

“Sure.” He picked up the second gamepad and handed it to her. “Do you still know how?”

Kari took the pad from him, “I’m sure I’ll manage.”

Tai quickly exited to the main menu and entered the two-player mode. On the character select screen, he wasted no time in selecting the blue boiler-suited brothers; his go-to. Kari, on the other hand, would play as Peach and Da… What the hell, Bowser and Bowser Jr!! His head spun around to look at her.

She smiled at him, “just fancied a change, that’s all.”

He decided to ignore it as the first race began. The lights went out and he made off with a perfect start and after a few corners had taken the lead. Three laps of little incident later, he rounded the final corner and… BAM! A green shell crashed into the side of his kart and sent him into a spin. Helpless, all he could do was will his kart to get back up to speed as the father-son Bowser duo sped past him to take the win.

“Well, wasn’t that a lucky shot,” Kari said from beside him.

Tai turned to look at her, “one in a million,” he replied with a smile. At least now he wouldn’t have to go to the trouble of orchestrating a win for her.

Race two found them locked in a heated battle for the lead. Halfway through the last lap Kari once again caught him with a green shell. A flawless drive on her part and a lack of any useful items meant he finished behind her again. He gave her another sideways glance, those green shells she’d fired had not hit him by luck. “Since when did you get this good?”

A smile played on her lips when she answered, “I’ve always been this good. However, winning made you happy so I always let you.”

Tai stared at her in disbelief. If he had not just been on the receiving end of her sharpshooting, he wouldn’t have believed it. “You used to let me win?”

“All the time. As I said, it used to make you happy. If I’d wanted to, I could have beat you easily.”

“No way,” he said defiantly.

Kari laughed, “care to make a little wager on that?”

Tai gave her a quizzical look, “what do you have in mind?”

“Simple, winner gets to decide what we do for the rest of the afternoon... unless you’re scared.”

“No way!” he exclaimed, “you’re going down, Sis!”

Kari flashed him a wicked grin, “give it your best shot, Bro.”

The turtle shells flew, banana skins were dropped and several blue shells of death brought misery to their victims. The end result, despite a valiant effort in which he’d pulled out all the stops, Tai lost by five points. It transpired that Kari had not been lying, she really was that good. He let out a sigh of defeat and sat down his control pad. Even though he’d lost, it had still been great fun.

“Ok, you have to tell me, how did you get that good?” he asked out of curiosity.

Kari laughed, “what do you think I did all those times I was stuck at home because I was sick? Do you want to try your luck at Super Smash Bro’s or Killer Instinct?”

Before this weekend, if you had suggested Kari could best him at any game he would have laughed his head off. However, given what had just transpired, he now genuinely feared for his unbeaten record should he play her at something else. Unfortunately, while the idea of genuine competition was appealing, he had lost the bet. So it was up to Kari what they did now. “You won, Sis. So you get to pick what we do now.”

She let out a small laugh, “you’ve really matured, Tai. You would never have been this gracious in defeat when we were younger.”

While he would have liked to argue the point, he knew deep down that she was right. He would probably have thrown his gamepad away, claimed she had cheated or something else equally childish. “I guess you’re right,” he admitted. “I’ve always been really competitive and I don’t like to lose.”

She gave him a sideways look, “I think ‘don’t like to lose’ is an understatement.” When his face fell she let out a light-hearted laugh. “It’s part of who you are, Tai. That never say die attitude is the reason we all survived in the Digital world.” She sat her gamepad down on the coffee table and reached over to give him a hug. “I wouldn’t change anything about you.”

Tai returned his sisters embrace and similar to last nights second kiss, he could feel the love and warmth radiating from her. “I love you, Tai,” she whispered in his ear.

This was going to take some getting used to, he thought. Knowing exactly what Kari meant when she said those words to him. While he hoped it was just a phase she was going through, something deep down told him otherwise. His sister would never fall in love with anyone else. And by that virtue would never know what it felt like to have someone return that love. Nevertheless, he dutifully replied, “I love you too, Kari.”

After a few moments, he felt her give him a light squeeze before breaking off the hug. “Wait here, I’ll be back in a moment.”

He watched his sister get up off the sofa and head off to her bedroom. Tai licked his lips and realised he desperately needed a drink. He glanced over at the sacred refrigerator in which he would find a delicious cold can of soda. Forgetting what Kari had said to him earlier he moved to get off the sofa.

“If you’re thinking of going into that kitchen I hope you’re prepared to spend the night on the toilet.”

Tai froze mid-step as he recalled the penalty she’d decreed for setting foot in the kitchen. Turning his head, he glanced in the direction of her bedroom. She could not have seen him so how on earth had she known? An image of the thing lurking in that casserole dish filled his mind and he shrank back down to the sofa.

“If you want something you need to ask for it,” Kari then called out.

He sighed. What kind of monster had he unleashed last night? Resigned to being at her mercy, he replied, “can I get a soda and maybe some snacks?”

His sister reappeared holding her CD box. “Of course you can, I’ll see what I can find.”

He turned the GameCube and TV off while he waited for her to return from the kitchen. When she sat down and handed him a soda he thanked her before cracking it open. He took a much needed long drink before hungrily eyeing up the large bag of potato chips and jar of sour cream dip she sat down on the table.

“We’re going to listen to Tubular Bells again, then I want to try out the Pink Floyd album,” she said as she opened the chips and dip, indicating that he could help himself.

Reaching a hand out he took a chip, dunked it, then popped it in his mouth. Kari being accretive about what she wanted was something else that would take a bit of getting used to, he mused as he crunched down on it. “If that’s what you want to do, go for it,” he replied as he watched Kari pick up the stereo remote.

The haunting piano and glockenspiel opening sent a shiver down his spine as he ate some more chips. Beside him, his sister had settled herself and shut her eyes. He ate his chips before following suit. While he knew what to expect this time, he found the album no less mind-blowing. He had to hand it to her, she’d broken away from the pack and found something poles apart from what all her friends would have been listening to. Also, the fact it meant so much to her and she’d chosen to share it, made him feel like she had shared part of her soul.

When it wrapped up he made a move to get some more chips, only for Kari to ask him a strange question, “so, who’s Teiko?”

He turned to look at her, a dumb expression on his face.

“That embarrassed, Tai,” she laughed when he failed to respond.

“No... I...” he mumbled as her laughter intensified.

“You always were hopeless when talking about girls.”

He let out a slow breath as he tried to regain his composure. “We were in middle school together,” he eventually answered.

The look on his sisters face told him that his response was not going to cut the mustard and he quickly buckled under her stare. “Ok, ok, we were good friends in middle school... when she decided to show up.”

“So she’s a bit of a rebel. Good to know.”

Tai gave her a confused look, “why is that good to know?”

Kari rolled her eyes at him, “you are so dense sometimes, Brother, that it’s cringe-worthy.”

The confusion quickly shifted to sheer dumbfoundedness. “...What..?” he stammered.

He received a punch in the arm. “Wake up and smell the coffee, Tai. She totally has the hots for you.”

“What? Don’t be ridiculous, Kari. We’re just old school friends.”

His sister gave him a wicked grin. “I’ll bet you another CD that she calls in that favour and wants you to take her out on a date.”

Now she was just spouting gibberish, Tai thought. He and Teiko had been really good friends, but she’d never indicated that she liked him more than that. “And when she doesn’t?” he asked.

“In the unlikely event that she doesn’t, you can pick whatever you want.”

She held out a hand which he tentatively took. “Fine, you’re on.”

Why on earth did she look so confident he wondered? Teiko was just a friend. He also had another question, “why are you so interested?”

“Let’s just say I have a vested interest in who my brother dates,” Kari said as her grin somehow widened. “Besides, I don’t want you upsetting my hairstylist because your too thick to notice when someone likes you.”

He let go of her hand and proceeded to eat some more chips. However, her comments brought to mind the catfight that she and Sora had engaged in when the other girl had shocked him by choosing Matt. It had not been pretty and he could recall vividly the three bloody lines Kari had left on the girls face; they had required stitches. If history was any indication, her last comment had not quite been accurate. It was not her needing to worry about him upsetting Teiko, it was he who needed to worry about Teiko upsetting him. 


	12. Pt2 03) Wish you were here

**Part Two: His Secret**

**Chapter Three: Wish you were here**

Four notes, that was all it took. Four beautifully haunting notes that had sent a shiver down her spine and she was hooked. After making her bet with Tai over Teiko, Kari had promptly gone over to the CD player and put Wish You Were Here on. While a completely different animal from her Mike Oldfield albums, it shared a common thread in that the music took centre stage. The five tracks may have had lyrics, but they typically served only to complement, not dominate the compositions. When the final keyboard notes faded out, she knew Iowa had been right, this album was something special.

Opening her eyes, Kari turned to look at Tai. “I don’t know about you, but that just blew me away.”

She watched as her brother took a few slow breaths. His facial expression telling her that he had been stunned. “I never knew music could make you feel this way,” he eventually said. “The sheer amount of emotion that guitarist conveys is unreal.”

She nodded her head in agreement. “Looks like I’ve got another set of albums to research and collect.” Turning to glance at the clock, she then added, “I’d best go make a start on dinner. It’ll take me a while so why don’t you go play another video game.”

“Maybe I will,” Tai replied as she stood up. “Unless you need my help.”

“Is that your way of trying to sneak into the kitchen, Tai Kamiya?” she replied playfully.

“No... I...”

“If you so much as look in at what I’m cooking...” she intentionally left the threat unspoken.

She found the look of horror on her brother’s face to be rather amusing. So much so that the thought of serving him a portion of the unspeakable evil that lurked in the fridge crossed her mind. However, that would just be plain mean. Crossing the apartment, she entered the kitchen and began sourcing what she needed to prepare the meal. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Tai get up and head for his room. By the time she heard noise coming from the TV, she had everything ready. For tonight’s dinner, she planned to make some of her brother's favourite dishes. Salmon and cucumber maki (sushi rolls) to start, followed by pork katsu with sticky jasmine rice and sweet chilli sauce for the main and churros for dessert. It had cost her the last of her birthday money to buy everything, but given how much she suspected Tai had spent on her yesterday, it paled in comparison.

It took just over two hours to make all three courses and by the end of it, Kari felt drained. However, she still had to serve. She just hoped everything worked out ok. The churros were still in the freezer and she had no idea how well they would fry when it came time for dessert.

“Tai, dinner’s ready,” she called out to him.

“Ok,” he called back, sounding rather frenzied, “just gimmie a.. OH NO, YOU DON’T!”

Kari smiled to herself as she heard him yell a few choice phrases at the TV, he seemed to be enjoying herself. Picking up the plates of sushi, she made her way to the table and sat them down, just as she heard Tai yell, “YES! Take that you filthy sod!”

She sat down and waited for him to join her. “Have fun?” she asked once he was seated.

“Yeah,” he replied, sounding slightly breathless, “sucker almost had me there.”

“I could tell,” she laughed, watching him glance at his plate.

“Wow, Kari, this looks amazing!”

“Then tuck in,” she said, picking up her chopsticks.

She waited on Tai trying a piece before eating anything herself. Not that she was using him as a guinea pig, rather his opinion mattered more than her own appetite. Uncharacteristically, her brother took his time in picking up a piece, putting it in his mouth and chewing.

“This tastes even better than it looks,” he said in awe after properly swallowing.

“I’m glad you like it,” she replied, giving him a warm smile and feeling a small bubble of pride swell inside her.

They ate the sushi rolls in comfortable silence with Tai maintaining his formal manners throughout. Perhaps her threat of serving him the creature from the casserole dish had made a more profound impact on him than she’d intended. When they had finished, Kari took the used crockery to the kitchen then plated up the katsu. She watched as Tai’s eyes widened upon her return, drool almost escaping his salivating mouth.

“Kari, you really didn’t have to go to all this trouble just to feed me,” he said when she set the plate down in front of him.

“I know I didn’t, but I wanted to,” she replied, echoing what he himself had said to her yesterday in Shockers.

Again she waited on his seal of approval before starting, which came in the form of a look of complete serenity spreading across his face. The bubble of pride swelled slightly more, two down, one to go. Her mind wandered to the freezer where her churros were hopefully solidifying enough to maintain their shape once dropped in the pan of oil. This was the first time she’d ever tried to make them and according to the recipe she’d found online, they could go drastically wrong.

After they had been eating for a few moments, Kari decided that now would be as good a time as any to broach a subject that had been bothering her since yesterday, one she’d tried to push to the side in her elation. “What are you going to say to mom about my hair?”

She watched Tai think for a moment before he answered, “I’ll tell her the truth if that’s what you want?”

Kari gave him a puzzled look, “what do you mean by that?”

“You’ve been a lot happier these past two days and not just because you told me your secret last night.”

She gave him a solemn nod.

Her brother gave her a reassuring smile, “you shouldn’t shut yourself away anymore. It’s important for you to be… well, you. Even if that means other people have to accept that you’ve changed.”

She thought about this for a moment. Tai was right. How could she go back to being the ‘innocent child of light’ after having been liberated these past few days? The answer was simple, she couldn’t. She laughed, “unless I permanently wear a hat when around mom and dad, they might as well find out everything in one go.”

Tai shared in her laughter, “then I suppose that settles that. I’ll meet you after school and we’ll come home together. That way you won’t have to face mom alone.”

“Thanks, Tai,” she replied, although she could not help but feel guilty. She knew fine well that her brother intended to throw himself atop the live grenade that would be their mother once the woman saw her. She would have to find some way of making it up to him.

They finished the Katsu and Kari once more cleared the table. When Tai motioned to get up she halted him in his tracks, “we’re not done yet.”

He gave her a tentative look as he sat back down, “please tell me you didn’t find one of mom’s dessert disasters in the freezer.”

“Actually I did, but don’t worry, it’s gone to a place where it can’t harm anyone,” she said as she opened the freezer door.

From the table, she could almost hear her brother wipe the sweat from his forehead. Pulling out her tray of churro’s she gave them the once over before turning to the stove and heating a pan of oil. When it reached the correct temperature, she picked up one of the thin doughnut style sticks with a pair of tongs. Here goes nothing, she thought as she placed it into the oil. For a moment it looked as though it might lose its shape and turn into a fried piece of goop, only for the outside to start crisping. When she pulled it out it had transformed into a golden brown ridged stick; perfect. Wasting no time, she fried the rest and served them with a dusting of cinnamon and icing sugar, a scope of vanilla ice cream and a chocolate dip.

If Tai’s eyes had been wide before, it was nothing when compared to how he looked when Kari sat the dessert down in front of him. In awe, he looked over at her, “when mom and dad get back we need to have a serious family meeting to discuss you doing the cooking instead of mom.”

“I don’t think dad’s brave enough to second you on that motion,” she replied.

Tai took a bite out of his first churro, the heavenly expression returning to his face. “Bring some of these to the meeting and he might. They’re divine.”

Kari chuckled as she tried one for herself. They were slightly too sweet for her tastes. Perhaps adding a dash of salt to the mixture would solve that problem. When Tai had finished, much like when they were younger, she slid her plate over to him. “Here, you can finish mine if you want.”

Her brother looked between her and the plate, a mix of longing and guilt on his face. “You don’t have to…”

“You’ll enjoy them more than I will. They’re slightly too sweet for me.”

‘Grudgingly’, her brother accepted her offer and practically cleaned the plate. “So what do you want to do now?” he asked.

She gave him a smirk, “you’ve got an entire mountain of dishes to wash.” A look of horror spread over his face, however, before he could reply, she added, “your kitchen ban is lifted. Just in case you try to use that as an excuse.”

The expression on Tai’s face changed to one of confusion, “wait, why do I need to do the dishes?”

“Digitamamon rules,” she replied simply. “You either pay for your meal in US dollars or you do the dishes until your bill is paid.”

“That’s not fair!” Tai exclaimed.

They both knew she was joking, but it was fun nonetheless. “It wasn’t fair on Joe either, but that’s the rules.” In a flash, she narrowed her eyes and pulled off a rather impressive impersonation of the large egg Digimon, “now get in that kitchen, or I’m going to get angry.”

Her brother visibly jumped. “Ok, ok, I’ll go if you promise never to do that again.”

Kari stood up, walked around the table and patted him on the shoulder as she collected the plates. “And you’re supposed to be the bearer of courage too.”

“I don’t think you realise just how scary you can be,” he replied as he stood up and followed her into the kitchen.

She flashed him a devilish look, “oh I know just how scary I can be. It’s you that doesn’t.”

When she burst out laughing he quickly joined in. “I’m getting worried about what I’ve unleashed.”

“You should be. Now, let's get those dishes cleaned.”

They cleaned up the kitchen while exchanging wisecracks and doing funny impersonations. Afterword’s, they headed back to the sofa to finish up the weekend. Tai picked a film, Terminator 2 after which he wanted a Mario Kart rematch. She gave him exactly what he asked for, a backside full of green turtle shell as she beat him for a second time. This was going to become a recurring thing she realised. By the time she was getting ready for bed, the third of her new albums blasting through her headphones, Kari felt somewhat at peace with the world. Walking out onto her balcony, she gazed out towards the horizon; there were clouds gathering. An omen pertaining to the return of her parents perhaps? She pushed it aside for now. What happened after she came home from school tomorrow was a little later on. She wished to enjoy the last moments of this weekend without worrying about the fallout. And she did not fail to see the irony in that thought. When she’d left school on Friday, she had expected this weekend to be hell. Only for it to turn out to be quite the opposite.


	13. Pt2 04) Mother

**Part Two: His Secret**

**Chapter Four: Mother**

By late afternoon, a thick bank of clouds had rolled in, obscuring the sun from Odaiba residents view. A thunderstorm was on its way, or at least so the daily weather forecast had claimed. At the local middle school, the end of day chime had sounded well over half an hour ago, resulting in the orderly exit of much of the student body. Kari Kamiya had not been one of them. Her brother's school finished thirty minutes after her own and it would take him at least ten to cycle from there to here. So she had spent the extra time working on the first piece in a mountain of homework that had been dished out over the course of the day. Apparently, her class’ free weekend had come at a cost.

A glance at the clock told her that Tai would have left the high school about five minutes ago. Finishing the sentence she had been writing, Kari closed over her notebook and put down her pen. Standing up she began to pack away her things. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed one of the other girls do the same; Hitana if memory served. Paying her no mind, she picked up her bag and casually walked to the door. Out in the corridor, she headed for the nearest exit.

Even though she knew what awaited her at home, she was glad to be leaving. From the moment she had locked up her bike that morning, whispers had followed her everywhere. In hushed voices, she had heard people saying things like, _“is that Kamiya?” _followed by replies such as, _“no way is that Kari… holy crap I think it is.” _Needless to say, her new hairdo had been the main focus of the grapevine all morning. By break time, the first boy had plucked up the courage to come over to her and ask her out. She’d politely rejected him. After TK and Davis, she had no wish to date other boys. Either it would just not work out or she would have to break another heart. Two other boys and one girl had also tried their luck, to no avail.

Reaching the bike racks, she unlocked her blue framed bicycle and wheeled it out towards the exit, where she could see Tai was already waiting for her.

Her brother smiled at her as she approached, “what took you so long.”

“I stayed behind to make a start on my mountain of homework,” she replied glumly.

“You guys too, huh,” he said before adding, “we’d best be on our way home. No sense in delaying the inevitable.” He gave her a grin, but she could tell it was forced. For they both knew that an argument almost certainly awaited them when they got there.

Kari nodded her head and they set off in the direction of home; pushing their bikes. Once they had crossed onto the opposite sidewalk, Tai asked her, “so, how was your day?”

Kari smiled as she replied, “the usual. Whispers following me around everywhere I went. A couple of boys asking me out… a girl asking me out.”

Tai burst out laughing at her last comment, “seriously?”

“Yeah.”

“I didn’t realise Teiko had given your sexual orientation a makeover as well as your hair.”

“She definitely didn’t,” Kari laughed. “The girl apologised, but said I looked too gorgeous for her not to try her luck.”

He gave her a knowing look, “I bet the boys all thought the same.”

“I said no to them too, if that’s what you’re asking.”

Tai turned to face her, “you’ll find someone… someday, Kari.”

She sighed as her reddish-brown eyes met with his chocolate ones, “I already did, that’s the problem.”

They walked the rest of the way home in silence. Locking their bikes up in the undercroft, Kari followed Tai up the stairs and to their apartment. When they reached the door, Tai stopped her before he opened it. “No matter what mom says, I’m responsible, ok.”

After a moment in which she felt a wave of guilt crash down upon her, she nodded her head. In front of her, Tai opened the door and they stepped inside.

“We’re home,” he called out as they swapped outdoor for indoor shoes.

“Hi, kid’s,” Kari heard their mother call out from the kitchen, her voice followed by the sound of footsteps. The woman came into view, carrying an empty pot. Clearly, she was in the process of making dinner. “You’re father’s had to pop out but he’ll…” there was a loud metallic thud as the pot hit the floor. “KARI KAMIYA, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO YOUR HAIR!”

True to form, Tai immediately stepped between them. “It’s my fault, Mom,” he said firmly. “I took her to get it done.”

“What!” their mother exclaimed as she rounded on her brother.

This scenario was nothing new to Kari. Any time throughout their childhood that they were both in trouble, Tai would say something to get their mothers attention. Then, for some reason, their mother would rain the bulk of her furry down upon him. And Kari had a fair idea of what that reason was. Their mother, in her opinion, had never managed to fully forgive her brother for the incident all those years ago where he had taken her to the park when she was ill.

“I took her to a salon where my friend, Teiko, works as a stylist and I paid her to do it,” Tai replied, maintaining his strong posture.

“Kari, go to your room. I’ll deal with you later,” their mother barked.

Knowing that anything she said or did would only make matters worse, Kari did as she was told. As she passed her brother, she gave his hand a light squeeze, trying to convey how sorry she was through it. Their mother gave her a reproachful glare. Walking slowly to her bedroom door, she crossed the threshold and closed it behind her. This was all her fault. She should never have let Tai talk her into getting her hair done. Now he was in serious trouble. Pressing her head back against the woodwork, she listened to the ensuing argument.

“What gives you the right to decide whether or not your sister can do **that** to her hair!”

“Because you would never have let her and she wouldn’t have done it by herself.”

“With good reason! Unlike you, your sister has some measure of common sense and restraint. Her only fault is she falls victim to your corrupting influence. Do you have **any **idea what that sort of hair makes her look like?”

“Herself!”

“A delinquent!”

Kari put her head in her hands as she listened to her mother and brother fight. This was not how these things normally went down. Tai usually stayed silent as the hammer battered down and took the inevitable punishment when it was eventually doled out without question. However, today he was fighting back. This could not possibly end well.

“Wake up and smell the coffee, Mom, she’s not this perfect little eight-year-old angel that you and dad cant dispel the image of.”

“How **dare** you suggest I don’t know my own daughter!”

“What music does she like to listen too, Mom? Where would she buy the bulk of her clothes if she could?”

The questions seemed to catch her mother off guard as there was a definite pause. “Who do you think you are, questioning me like that?”

“The person actually took the time to get to know the real Kari over the past few days.”

“I KNOW WHO MY DAUGHTER IS!”

Kari heard Tai let out a loud snort, “you don’t.”

SMACK! The noise, though barely louder than a handclap, rang in Kari’s ears like a thunderclap. In horror, she covered her mouth with her hands. Her mother had just hit Tai! It had been a long time since the woman had lost her temper to the point that she lashed out at her brother. Regardless, it was all her fault. A torrent of guilt, sorrow and regret flooded over her in the deathly silence that hung in the wake of their mother's actions.

After a few moments, Kari heard the soft sound of footsteps in her direction. The owner walked passed her door and down the hall. She then heard Tai say something in a quiet monotone, “Mike Oldfield and h.NAOTO. If you care at all, you’ll ask her about it.” The noise of what she presumed was his door opening and closing quickly followed.

This was all her fault. Because of her desire to have her hair dyed, their mom had hit her brother. Out of nowhere she suddenly felt an unfamiliar anger rise to the surface. How dare she hit Tai! Well, she was not going to just stay in her room until her mom decided to come and punish her too. Her brother needed comfort right now and she was going to give it to him. Taking a deep breath, she turned around and opened her bedroom door.

##

The door closed behind Tai and he slumped down onto the edge of his bed. His left cheek hurt like hell. The force of his mother’s blow having been enough to jerk his neck around. While he had been fully prepared for her to be angry, he had not anticipated just how incensed with rage his argument would make her. However, if he had to pay the price so that Kari could be herself, then so be it. His sister deserved the right to express herself out with the confines of her own bedroom.

He raised a hand and winced when it came into contact with his stinging skin. When he was younger, his mother would normally take her frustrations out on his backside. It was only in those rare instances, when her anger reached a certain level, that she lost control and struck him across the cheek. Today marked number four. Images flashed through his head of the previous three occasions. The time in the hospital after he had almost killed Kari… When he and Kari had stayed out well past their bedtime to play with kids in the neighbourhood… And when she had found out he’d taken Kari and Yolei to a concert she’d deemed inappropriate.

From out in the hallway he heard the sound of a door opening and he strained his ears to listen. The accompanying footsteps headed away from his room and towards the main living area of the apartment. Kari, he breathed wordlessly. He would have expected her to remain in her room until their mother decided to go and yell at her.

“What are you doing?” he heard his mom shout. “Did I say you could leave your room?”

Either Kari did not reply or he was unable to hear her do so. However, his sister’s choice quickly became apparent.

“Answer me, young Lady.”

Another heartbeat of silence passed before he heard Kari reply, “you hit my brother.”

Not distance nor door could mask the cold deadpan nature of his sister’s tone. Deep inside Tai knew that she was angry. As though he could feel the emotion for himself. And this was not like the momentary flash he had witnessed on Friday night. No, this was something else… something deep-seated.

“That is none of your concern, young Lady.”

“He was only trying to protect me and you hit him.”

“Stop it, Kari.”

Tai froze at the sound of worry in his mother’s voice. Never before had he heard that in her tone when in the middle of an argument. Then again, this whole situation was uncharted territory. His sister never argued with their parents nor did she get angry.

“How many times, Mom. How many times have you hit him?”

“Kari, I’m warning you, stop it.”

There was clear desperation in his mother’s voice now, but Tai could only sit there, rooted to the spot. While It was clear that his sister had touched a nerve, he could only wonder what Kari’s facial expression looked like to elicit that level of fear in a woman over twice her age.

“Or what, Mom, you’ll hit me too?”

“Kari I would never…”

“That’s exactly the point, Mom. You never would hit me. So why did you hit Tai?”

This was something that he knew full well to be true. Their mother never had and never would hit his sister. For some reason, whether it was because he always threw himself in front of Kari or not, their mother did not have it in her to hit her daughter. When the woman next responded her voice had started to crack.

“I need to protect you, Kari… your brother… he has a habit of doing rash, foolish things that put you in unnecessary danger.”

“I don’t need to be protected from my brother, but sometimes I think he needs to be protected from you.”

“Kari... you don’t underst...”

“He was eight, Mom! He didn’t understand what he was doing and made a mistake!”

A trickle of cold sweat ran down Tai’s back and caused him to involuntarily shudder. Had he not been listening to the argument, he would probably have dismissed its content ridiculous. Except hearing those words made it all too real. His own mother thought him a bad, potentially dangerous influence on his sister. And, unfortunately, his own brain had already provided the supporting evidence. All four occasions when she had lost control of her temper and struck him had revolved around Kari. Could it be true, he wondered? For the first time since that fateful day when he was eight, Tai was forced to consider the possibility that he was a bad influence on his little sister. That he put her in dangerous situations because of his own foolishness.

“I’m not listening to any more of this, young Lady.”

“I’ve said all I needed to say to you.” A sound that may have been the fridge door opening followed Kari’s words. Soon after he could hear the distinct sound of soft footsteps coming in his direction.

“Tomorrow after you finish school you’re getting your hair put back to its proper colour!” his mother called out.

From directly outside his door, Tai heard Kari reply definitively, “no,” before it opened and she stepped inside. She turned to face him, “hi,” she said softly.

He raised a hand, “hi yourself.” He shuffled over on the bed to make space for her to sit down.

She accepted the invitation to join him. The look on his face must have shown how he felt, for she then said, “you heard all of that, didn’t you?”

“About as much as you heard of my spat with mom.”

Kari reached out and threw her arms around him. “I’m so sorry, Tai. This is all my fault.”

“It’s not your fault that you’re not the person people think you are. Mom’s just going to have to learn to deal with it.”

“But it’s because of me that she...”

He gently cut her off before she could finish the sentence, “it’s not because of you. Mom obviously feels that she needs to stop me being such a bad influence.”

Kari tore herself away and looked him straight in the eyes. “You’re not. And don’t let Mom make you feel that way.” She then picked up an ice pack that she’d brought with her and held it against his left cheek. “Here, I thought this might help.”

Tai felt the sting intensify for a few moments before the numbing effect of the ice took over. He reached up a hand to take the pack from his sister. Her normally warm fingers felt cold, but that was to be expected.

“Kari,” he said after a brief period of silence, “don’t let mom change your hair back. Fight if you have to. I’ll support you all the way.”

She stared into his eyes again and he gave her a steely look of determination. “I will,” she nodded. They embraced again before Kari said, “I’d best go start my homework before dinner. It turns out there’s no such thing as a free weekend.”

Tai laughed, “same here. The way our teachers acted today, you’d have thought we’d had a full week off.”

His sister gave him a warm smile, stood up from the bed and left the room. Leaving Tai alone with his thoughts. “Am I a bad influence on you?” he whispered to himself. His mind thought back to the weekend and in particular the aftermath of Saturday night’s conversation. If his knee jerk reaction had turned out to be true, he certainly would be. And if this was how their mom had reacted to him enabling Kari to dye her hair, what would she do if it had transpired that they were both in love with each other and she found out? He did not want to think about that. However, not good would probably have transpired to be the understatement of the century. 


	14. Pt2 05) Echoes

**Part Two: His Secret**

**Chapter Five: Echoes**

The storm had hit late the previous evening and not let up until about half an hour before Kari had to leave for school the next morning. She’d felt sorry for Tai, who’d had to leave early for soccer practice and as a result, would have been soaked on the way there and for much of the duration. Nevertheless, she’d almost been tempted to take the rain over the awkward silence that had permeated the apartment since last night’s arguments. In fact, the only words her mother had said to her that morning had been to tell her that she would be purchasing hair dye today so she could undo the damage that had been done to her hair. While she had said nothing in reply, for she had wished to avoid another argument so soon, Kari had sworn to herself that it would happen over her cold, dead corpse. After striking her brother, the woman had forfeited any right to tell her what to do. It still burned her deep inside when she heard the echo of her mother’s hand making contact with Tai’s face.

The morning had been a much quieter affair than yesterday. The whispered conversations as she passed people in the corridors having died out for the most part. A series of mind-numbing lessons prior to morning break had left her in sore need of some stimulation. She normally liked school, but this morning’s collection of classes had been downright dire. When the chime to indicate her boredom had ended, Kari wasted no time in putting her headphones on and selecting Wish You Were Here. It seemed the Pink Floyd album was going to become a staple of her collection. Leaving the room, she made her way outside and found a quiet place to sit behind the old bike shed. For thirteen and a half minutes (the duration of the first track) she drowned in the soulful sounds of a band working through their feelings of absence and regret. Themes that she could relate with all too well while sitting gazing upon faces that she would once have spent this time in conversation with.

Standing up she robotically began making her way back across the playground. So absorbed in the chilling acoustic guitar strums of the second track, Kari failed to notice someone standing in her path with their back turned. In her head, she counted down to the opening lyric. Three, two, one… crash! She collided with the human-shaped obstacle and sent them both sprawling to the ground.

Hitting the dirt, her headphones fell off just in time for her to hear, “watch where you’re going.”

The voice sounded irritable but caused Kari to freeze. Her eyes turned to see the rumpled figure of Yolei pick herself up. “I’m so sorry, Yolei,” she said apologetically.

“Well, so you should…” the girl instinctively fired back, only to stop before finishing the sentence. “Kari?” she then asked looking down at her.

“Hey,” she replied meekly and gave the girl a small wave.

Yolei stared at her blankly for a moment before apparently remembering that they no longer spoke. “Watch where you’re going next time, Kamiya,” she barked, then turned away.

“Yolei… wait,” she called out as she scrambled to her feet.

The lavender haired girl kept walking, “save it, Kamiya.”

Kari lowered her head… absence and regret. She bent down to pick up her headphones just as the chime to signal the end of morning break sounded. It seemed her weekend happy had well and truly come to an end.

##

Kari spent the rest of the morning in a sombre mood. Her mind filling with echoes of times she had spent with her old friends. It seemed that a combination of Shine on You Crazy Diamond pts1-5 and a collision with Yolei had reminded her that she actually missed them; who would have guessed? Alone at her lunch table, her eyes involuntarily located each of the other DigiDestined. There was a time when the five of them would have eaten lunch together. The bonds between them stronger than the individual ones each held with their respective cliques. Something that no longer held true. Davis sat amongst the soccer players, centre of attention as always. Yolei with a group of the brighter girls that she herself had once been friends with. Cody had eventually found his place with some of the school’s other martial artists; his Kendo skills having qualified him for the regional championship. And finally… TK. Impeccably dressed and polite as ever, had found himself amidst a group from the creative writing club. While they all looked happy, they were still separate.

Kari sighed as she played with her food. Apparently, she had been the glue that kept everyone together. And when she had broken up with TK, the splintering had begun. Becoming ever more distant, she had started to skip social gatherings with Yolei and the other girls. Eventually, after missing her birthday party, the other girl had confronted her about it. The resulting conversation had devolved into an argument when she had been unwilling to explain what was wrong with her. Eventually, the lavender haired girl had lost patience and told her that she needed to, _“get a grip.”_ To which Kari had replied, _“just leave me the hell alone!”_ Yolei had done just that and so ended their friendship. Davis, who she had remained friends with even after their own relationship had broken up, had eventually stopped trying to engage with her at the end of last year. Such was the level of her detachment. And Cody… well, he’d been Cody and taken his usual take it or leave it approach with friendship.

Would any of them talk to her if she were to go over and speak to them? Davis probably would. It might be a bit awkward at first but then he’d make one of his bad jokes, that were somehow worse than Tai’s, which would cause her to laugh and that would probably be that. Cody would likely be indifferent as always but still talk to her. Hell, she might even be able to get the three of them together. Kari’s eyes wandered back over the long lavender hair of Yolei. She would be the difficult one. Their altercation earlier had proven that the other girl still held a fairly substantial grudge. And TK… she didn’t even bother pondering TK. While she may have missed his friendship the most, he was off the table. Most likely for good.

The impending sorrow forced Kari to push all thoughts of a reunion out of her mind. It was stupid of her to even contemplate it she reasoned. Reaching into her bag, she pulled out her music player. Pulling her headphones on, she found Crises and put it on. An apt selection for her current emotional state. However, the opening piano notes quickly helped her to restore some level of calm and order. This was how things were now. They all had their own cliques and she had no one. And all of her own making.

##

The end of the school day finally came and Kari was relieved to leave the classroom and make her way to her locker. Her afternoon lessons had been on par with their morning counterparts and left her mind at the mercy of her memories. Now that she was free from the crushing weight that had been her secret love for Tai, she’d discovered a new truth. She missed her friends… a lot. And it was time to do something about it. Spying Yolei a few doors down she let out a slow breath. If she was going to do this then there was no time like the present. She closed her locker and walked the short distance down the corridor to where the lavender haired girl stood.

“Hi,” she said by way of a greeting. Yolei turned her head but before she could say anything, Kari added, “listen, I’m really sorry about earlier.”

“I told you to save it, Kamiya,” the girl turned away from her and slammed her locker closed.

She let out a sigh. This was never going to be easy, but she had to start somewhere. “Yolei, I’m sorry.”

“I told you to…”

“I’m sorry for everything,” she cut in.

Yolei turned back to face her, a look of confusion spread across her face.

Kari seized the opportunity to continue. If after she had said her piece the girl chose to tell her to fuck off, that was her prerogative to do so. However, she had to try. “I’ve been in a really bad place over the past year and the way I treated you was inexcusable.”

“So what, you got your hair dyed and all of a sudden you’re a brand new you?”

“I spent the weekend with Tai and he took me to get it done. We talked for a while and he helped me work through a lot of stuff. Knocking into you today made me realise just what I’d lost.” She hung her head. “I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness, but I need you to know that I’m really sorry.”

“Do you plan on telling me what happened to you?” Yolei asked the question, but the short manner in which she did told Kari that she would not accept a fudged response or the ‘that doesn’t matter anymore’ routine. How much did she dare tell her old friend? Especially given that, as things stood, it could easily become tomorrow’s playground gossip.

She sighed, “I made a terrible mistake two years ago and have been paying for it ever since.”

Yolei tilted her head but did not say anything. Granted, she didn’t have to. For her expression clearly told Kari that further explanation was required or she would walk.

“Is there any chance I could convince you to go somewhere more private?” she asked, hoping Yolei had enough interest to agree.

She watched as the other girl thought for a moment. “Buy me a crepe and I’ll hear you out.”

Internally Kari did a backflip. It was a foot in the door and would make a good start. Now she just had to figure out how she told the truth without revealing her secret. They set off down the corridor and for the first time in almost a year, the two girl’s left school side by side. Nothing was said between them as they made their way to the local park and towards the kind street vendor that sold crepes with a variety of different fillings. However, Yolei kept shooting her sideways glances, probably trying to figure her out. Kari paid the nice lady for one strawberry and one chocolate crepe and once they were made handed the latter to the other girl. The pair then found a quiet bench beneath a tree and sat on opposite sides.

“So what happened?” Yolei asked after a mouthful of sweet chocolaty goodness. The food it seemed had softened her tone.

“I fell in love with someone I shouldn’t have,” Kari replied slowly, then quickly took a bite out of her own dessert.

“Like someone else’s boyfriend?”

She wiped an imaginary bead of sweat from her forehead, “something like that.”

This had been enough to gain Yolei’s full attention and she could hear her try to mask her excitement when she asked, “who was it?” The girl, it seemed, still had a thing for stories about forbidden love.

Kari hung her head, “please don’t ask me that.” She had a lie prepared in case Yolei did not relent, but she hoped she would not need to use it.

“It wasn’t Ken, was it?” the other girl asked suspiciously, clearly figuring that her own boyfriend would be number one on the list of people she would not wish to divulge the identity of.

“It wasn’t Ken. But please don’t keep trying to guess.” She took the opportunity while Yolie had her mouth full, to move the story along. “When TK asked me out, I foolishly said yes.”

The other girl swallowed before asking, “why?”

“In part, because everyone expected us to get together. But largely because I hoped by going out with someone else I would be able to learn to love them.”

“It didn’t work.” It was not a question, but then it didn’t need to be for they both already knew the answer.

“Everything was fine up until the day he first kissed me. I knew then that I did not love him.”

“I remember thinking you didn’t sound elated when you told me that he’d kissed you,” Yolei said before giving her a questioning look, “but why not end it there.”

“I was too scared. I felt scared about hurting him and about what the whole thing meant for me. That’s when I started to become distant. The entire thing started to consume me and I couldn’t deal with it. Of course, TK thought that he’d done something wrong and tried to fix it.”

“So why didn’t you talk to me? Maybe I could have helped.”

“I didn’t talk to anyone about it. Not even Tai,” Kari replied, hoping that by dropping her brother’s name, someone the other girl knew she trusted more than anyone, it would make her feel less put out. “Then TK took me out for our one year anniversary and tried to give me that promise ring. That’s when I knew I had to end it.”

“We all knew something had happened, but TK wouldn’t talk about it and you were off school for a week.”

Kari was about to reply with, _“it was the hardest thing I ever had to do,” _but after Saturday night, that was no longer the case. Telling Tai that she was in love with him had stolen that honour. Instead, she said, “I hated myself for it, but if I hadn’t of done it then, it would only have been worse for him.”

“I’m not going to lie to you and say I think it was a mercy. In fact, I think you should have done it sooner. But it sounds like you were having serious trouble with the whole issue and I can see why it might have been difficult for you to do it before you did.”

Yolei’s words told Kari nothing she hadn’t already beat herself up over, a hundred times prior. However, at least she was not completely condemning her actions. “Everything just spiralled out of control when I went back to school. Before I knew it, half our friends were fighting amongst themselves and all because of me. I slid into depression so quickly that I found it difficult to be around people.”

“So that’s why you started blowing us off.”

“Yes. I’d caused so much trouble for people already that I couldn’t bring myself to talk to anyone. Eventually, everyone and everything I’d cared about just slipped away and I was completely helpless to do anything to stop it.”

The lavender haired girl sat and considered her while she finished her crepe. Everything Kari had just told her had been true. She’d simply found a way of working it without the need to divulge the fact that her feelings for her own brother had been both the cause of and the thread that ran through it all. Eventually, Yolei said, “Kari, I am so sorry. I had no idea how much you had been suffering. If I’d known I would have…”

“It wasn’t your fault, Yolei. I was the one who couldn’t tell anyone.”

“Exactly. I know how depression works, you were physically unable to tell anyone. I was your best friend, I should have noticed something serious was wrong with you and did something to help. Instead, I thought you were just being a selfish bitch that needed to get their shit together.”

A wave of relief started to wash over Kari as she listened to her friend talk. Not because Yolei was trying to take the blame, but because she now had genuine hope that their friendship could be salvaged. “I got really good at pretending to everyone that I was ok. Even Tai didn’t figure it out until this weekend.”

“You shouldn’t make excuses for us, Kari,” Yolei said firmly, before adding in a more concerned tone, “are you feeling better now?”

Kari smiled at her, “Much. Talking with Tai over the weekend really helped. Not to mention my hair now looks like a lit match.”

“It’s really cool,” the other girl agreed. “So what happens now? Can you ever forgive me?”

“There’s nothing to forgive, Yolei. And I was hoping we could be friends again and…” she trailed off.

“And?” her friend asked.

There were a few seconds of silence before Kari eventually replied, “I was hoping that we could try to get everyone back together. However, maybe just the five of us to begin with. Six if Ken can make it.”

Yolei raised a hand and rubbed her temple. “Ken will come if I ask him to and Cody because he’s Cody. However, Davis won’t come if TK’s there and TK…”

“…won’t come because of me,” Kari finished for her.

“Five out of six is still a good start though,” the other girl said, trying to put a positive spin on it.

“Do you think Davis would be willing to let bygones be bygones with TK if I explained the whole story to him? It was because of me that he got dragged into that brawl after all.”

Yolei pondered for a moment, before saying, “I’m not sure. He might, but that doesn’t mean TK will be willing to do the same or…”

“…or that he’ll even be prepared to enter a building that isn’t school if he knows I’m inside.”

“Something like that. I guess the only options would be to either trick him inside or for you to try and talk to him beforehand.”

“He won’t respond well to being tricked, not if it involves me. I guess either I’ll have to try burying the hatchet with him first, or someone else asks him to come, but tells him who’s going to be there.”

“You should probably speak to Davis first. He’ll probably be more likely to listen to you than I was,” Yolei suggested.

Kari laughed. “Out of interest, how close did you come to telling me to fuck off?”

Yolei blushed slightly, “if I hadn’t been hungry…”

“Maybe it was fate that you came down with a serious case of the munchies right before I walked up to you.” This time they both laughed, after which Kari said, “we should probably get going. I still need to go back to school to get my bike before going home to enrage my mom.”

The other girl nodded before saying, “I’ll walk back with you.” She made a move to stand up, only to pause halfway to her feet. “Wait, what do you mean, enrage your mom.”

“I’ll explain on the way,” Kari laughed, though it was half-hearted at best.

The two girls deposited the wrappings from their crepes into a trashcan and began the short walk back to school. True to her word she explained the situation regarding her hair to Yolei. When they reached the main gate, the pair hugged one another and promised to see each other in homeroom the next day; they had a lot of catching up to do. Making her way to the bike rack, Kari unlocked and wheeled her blue bike out and hopped on. Before setting off, she looked up at the sky. Yesterday’s storm clouds had well and truly cleared. She just wished that the metaphorical ones at home would do the same.


	15. Pt2 06) It's what we do

**Part Two: His Secret**

**Chapter Six: It’s what we do**

If school weeks were Digimon and last week had been an ultimate level called Brutalmon, then it had digivolved over the weekend into its mega form, Insanemon. For that is exactly the metaphor Tai Kamiya would have used to explain how this past week had been worse than last. Except this time, there would be no respite for him over the weekend. The homework gods having forsaken his class and, quite frankly, went out to get hammered. Leaving space for the homework devils to move in and torment them. Cycling through the traffic, Tai bemoaned his fate for the umpteenth time that day. And it had been a long day. When the chime to signal the end of school had sounded, he’d headed for the computer lab instead of home. The former being the lesser of two evils. He’d stayed until one of the janitors had politely asked him to leave so he could lock up.

After Monday’s twin fight’s, his mother had barely said a word to him all week. In normal circumstances, she would have at least softened somewhat by now. However, the events of Tuesday had put pay to that happening anytime soon. When he’d come home from after study class, he’d found her in a thunderous mood. Having bought some brown hair dye, she had intended to undo the ‘damage’ that had been done to his sister’s hair. Except when Kari had arrived home, she had point-blank refused to play ball and locked herself inside her bedroom. He had then received the riot act, for it had been his bad influence that had caused the whole mess. Dinner time had only compounded the situation, for Kari had decided to prove a point and arrived at the table wearing her short tartan skirt, new h.NAOTO t-shirt and choker. She had also spiked her hair and applied some heavy dark eyeshadow. Their mother had gone nuclear. She had yelled and screamed at them both in turn and then rounded on their father who had surprisingly not been too bothered. If that wasn’t bad enough, Tai had also caught himself staring at Kari with a thought of how hot she looked passing through his head. In the end, there was nothing more their mother could do and Kari’s hair remained like a lit match.

Locking his bike in the undercroft, Tai dragged his feet as he carried his bulging bag of books up the multiple flights of stairs and along to the apartment. Opening the door with less enthusiasm than he had to see Myotismon again, he stepped inside and exchanged his shoes.

“I’m home,” he called, more out of habit than a wish to announce his presence.

“Tai!”

He lifted his head and came face to face with his sister’s lamp-like eyes. Where the hell had she come from? And why did she look and sound so happ…AY!!! Before he could cross the threshold into the main living area, his sister had descended on him and wrapped her arms around him.

“Miss me?” she asked with a smile

“Hey, Kari,” he replied, managing to push her off so he could step forward.

“Geez, Bro, you sound worse than you look. What happened, your teachers spring a set of surprise tests on you or something?”

He gave her a horrified look and in an unintentionally frantic manner said, “don’t say that sort of thing out loud or that’s exactly what I’ll walk into on Monday morning!”

“Ok…” Kari replied as she tilted her head to look at him, “you been hitting the coffee as well as the books too hard?”

She stepped aside and allowed him to pass, but chose to follow him to his room. “Where’s mom and dad?” he asked upon realising that the apartment seemed empty bar the two of them.

“Dad took mom out for the evening. Something about dinner and alcohol being the only two things that would stop us turning her prematurely grey. So don’t expect them to be back any time soon.”

“It’s going to take a lot of alcohol to get mom to lighten up after this week,” he said absentmindedly as he dropped his bag onto the floor.

Without thinking, he started to undress and it was only when he realised that Kari had not said anything for a few moments that he froze. Now wearing nothing but his boxers, he turned to face the door. His sister stood with her back against the frame, a mischievous smile dancing on her lips.

“KARI!” he exclaimed in alarm.

This only caused her to laugh. “What, you’re the one who decided to strip. I’m just enjoying the show.” In a flash, a hungry look filled her reddish-brown eyes and a devilish grin spread from ear to ear. “How much will it cost me to see you take off those boxers?”

Tai responded by hastily finding a pair of jeans and stuffing his legs inside them.

“You’re no fun,” Kari pouted as he found a t-shirt.

“This isn’t a peep show you know.”

“It would be if you took my money.”

Tai shook his head and left the room. He had suspected that Kari might try pushing the boundaries of their relationship, now that he knew her secret. Probing to find out how close she could get before he drew the line. A hug waited for him every time she greeted him and some of her commentary, such as what she had just said, verged on creepy. Yet for some reason, he had not put his foot down. Maybe it was because he enjoyed seeing her happy, or did not want to hurt her feelings? Regardless, he made a mental note to put the kybosh on it if she started trying to kiss him. The memory of the last time still haunted him whenever it caught him in an unguarded moment. And not because he thought it weird or wrong.

“What’s for dinner?” he decided to ask, as his stomach let out a growl.

“Well, mom bought stuff to make dinner…”

He gulped at the thought of another one of his mother’s home-cooked meals. All week there had been a noticeable drop in effort, which, inconceivable as it might be, had resulted in even worse experimental nightmares.

“…fortunately, dad intercepted her before she could so much as open a packet of rice and told her that he was taking her out. So I said I would cook for us.”

Tai’s eyes lit up like a pair of new-born stars at the news of a Kari cooked meal. He could think of nothing, after a week of surviving on cafeteria food and energy bars, that would appease his stomach more.

His sister must have seen the expression on his face for she then said, “are you sure you won’t fully strip for me? I can get my camera.”

She laughed when his eyes widened at the suggestion. “Kari, that is not fair!”

“Well, unless you’ve got some US dollars to pay for your dinner…”

“I’d rather wash every dish in the house!”

She looked at him pointedly, “you really have had a bad week, haven’t you?”

“The worst,” he sighed.

Taking him by the hand, his sister led Tai to the dinner table and sat him down. “You know what would improve your mood…” she asked, leaving the question hanging.

He gave her a suspicious look, half expecting the answer to be something she would enjoy and he would not, “what?”

“Losing a bet.”

He gave her a blank look. What was she talking about and how would that improve his mood?

Kari rolled her eyes, “do I need to explain everything to you?” When he did not respond she continued, “it’s Friday night and you haven’t checked your phone since before school ended.”

“How on earth would you know that?” he asked, for it was true.

His sister let out a long-suffering sigh. “If you’d bothered to check your phone, you would have known Dad took Mom out. Which means you won’t have seen the message from Teiko that will lose you our little bet but result in you having a date.”

Tai felt completely flabbergasted at his sister’s assertion, such was the confidence with which she made it. “How would you know if Teiko messaged me or not?” He paused for a moment, “have you spoken to Izzy and had him bug my phone?”

Kari laughed. While he’d meant it as a joke, it was not beyond the realms of possibility. Izzy’s ability with computers bordered the mad genius at times and Tai would not put it past him to be able to do that. “It’s nothing creepy-stalker-like, Brother. I’m a girl, she’s a girl. I know how she thinks. She’ll have been pondering what she wants all week, made a final decision at some point today and texted you.”

Tai’s mouth fell open as Kari explained the basic workings of the teenage female mind.

“However, since you’ve not bothered to look at your phone, she’ll now be wondering why you haven’t messaged back… and possibly pondering how she’s going to punish you for it.” A wicked grin that sent a shiver down his spine formed on Kari’s lips as she spoke, “I think you’d better check your phone, Tai”

As his sister left to go into the kitchen, he reached into his pocket and pulled out his cell phone. Sure enough, after reading a few other messages, he found one from Teiko. _“Hey, Kamiya, how’z it hanging? So, there’s a fair in town next weekend and you’re going to take me. You can pick me up at 6 pm on Saturday.”_ Tai did not know how to feel in regards to the ‘demand’, or the fact Kari had been dead on. While he liked Teiko a lot, he was unsure how a date between the two of them would go down. His past experience of trying to date a good friend hadn’t exactly ended well. As for his sister, she was becoming scary.

“So what did she say?” Kari asked innocently as she placed a plate of tempura vegetables with boiled rice and tentsuyu dipping sauce in front of him.

Tai barely heard her as he stared longingly at the meal she’d just put down. It smelled so good his stomach tried to gorge itself on the aroma alone. A hand then waved itself in front of his face, causing him to jump. “Earth to Tai. What did Teiko say?”

“Oh,” he shook his head to try and clear the desire for dinner from it long enough to answer her. “She wants me to take her to the fair next weekend.”

Kari did a fist-pump as she declared, “yes!” before smiling at him, “you lose, Bro. You can pay up when we next go into town. On the flip side, you get to go on a date with Teiko.”

Tai thought about this for a moment, his wandering eyes noticing the black bra she wore beneath her slashed t-shirt. Maybe a date was exactly what he needed. At the very least it might help take his mind away from Kari. “It might be fun,” he said as he picked up the first tempura vegetable; a slice of mushroom.

“Of course it will,” Kari replied. He watched her eat some of her own food before she added, “you know what else will be fun? Getting your butt kicked at Killer Instinct.”

“Sorry, Sis, I’ve got a tonne of homework I need to make a start on.”

The irony of the whole situation was not lost on him. This Friday, it seemed they had swapped roles. Unfortunately, unlike his sister last week, his homework was legit. The devilish grin once more spread over Kari’s face and he pondered whether or not he should just surrender now.

“Come on, Tai, you can’t spend your whole life studying, you’ll turn into Joe.”

Hearing his sister turn his own words against him caused Tai to shake his head and he could not help give her a grin. “My butt better be on that couch in ten minutes or you’ll drag me there?” he asked in amusement.

She laughed, “you do look like you can use the R&R. However, if you really do need to do homework, here’s what I suggest. We play a few rounds, then we can mutually study while listening to some music. I know this English guy whose music is great for that. We then get to play a few more during break time. Sound fun?”

While he certainly needed to get some of his homework done tonight, Kari’s idea sounded way more appealing than holing himself up inside his bedroom alone. “Yeah, let’s do it.”

They finished dinner, cleared up and headed for the sofa, where he noticed that Kari had already dug out the N64 and Killer Instinct Gold. She certainly did prepare well. Deciding to play the best of seven before hitting the books they hit the character select screen. He went with one of his two tried a tested warriors, Jago, while Kari, like when they played Mario Kart, threw him a curveball and picked Spinal over her traditional choice of Kim Wu. Round one was not fun. Not knowing what he was up against, left his character in a world of hurt. It seemed that his sister’s skill at Killer Instinct rivalled that of Mario Kart. Round two played out much the same as he desperately tried to shake off the rust. Giving Kari an easy 2-0 victory in the first bout. The next round also went her way, though he did not go down without a serious fight this time. Finally, he managed to claim the fourth but lost the fifth to go two-nil down in matches. It was bloody, brutal and played at a blistering pace, but unfortunately, left him licking his wounds after a 5-2 defeat. Those first two matches costing him dearly.

“Hope you study better than you fight, Tai,” Kari taunted with a smug grin.

Somehow he got the impression that she’d wanted to do that for a long time but thought he wouldn’t play with her anymore if she beat him. Which, given how much he hated to lose, he might well have done. However, he was older now, an adult and so going to get revenge. “Come break time, your ass is mine.”

And so it was. After an hour and a half of studying, during which Kari played for him two albums called The Songs of Distant Earth and Ommadawn, he and Jago got their revenge against his sister and her new pick Maya. Tubular Bells II and Crises came next and were followed by Maya sending his second character, Glacius, back into orbit. A short Wish You Were Here length final study period ended in Glacius crashing back down to Earth and crushing Spinal’s ancient bones to dust. Both worn out after the evening's activities, the siblings agreed to call it a draw.

“I think we should make this our new thing,” Kari said as they cleared away their respective piles of books and laptops.

“What, beating each other into a virtual pulp every time we have homework?”

They both laughed at his joke.

“You make it sound like we need therapy,” Kari chipped in.

To which he replied, “at the rate we’re going, the whole family is going to need therapy by next weekend.”

“Too bad you have a date next weekend,” Kari said slyly.

He thought for a moment before replying, “Teiko’s really good at listening. Maybe I can double book.”

“Listening to all your issues will probably send her to the nuthouse. Then who would do my hair?”

They sat back down on the sofa to have a slice of chocolate cake and a soda each before heading off to bed. After a few moments, Tai caught himself gazing at the orange, yellow and blonde strands of her hair. It was hard to picture her without the lit match look now, given how perfect it was for her. “So you’ve decided to dye it again once this iteration wears off?”

“Yep. I can’t go back to the old me. Not after everything that’s happened over the past week.”

He ate a mouthful of cake followed by a drink from his soda can. “Good. Mom will come around eventually. And if she doesn’t, and goes prematurely grey, you can call her a hypocrite when she uses that hair dye she bought on herself.”

A bout of hysterics from both parties later and Kari pulled him into a hug. “I’ve missed this,” she whispered.

“I thought you maintained that all my jokes were bad?”

“They are. However, that doesn’t mean I haven’t missed them.”

When she snuggled her head against his chest, Tai felt the oxymoronic urges to both push her away and wrap his arms around her and never let go. Why did he feel so conflicted? Surely he couldn’t… he snatched the thought out of his mind before it fully formed. No, that had been a moment of weakness, nothing more… He sighed internally. Perhaps this date with Teiko couldn’t come soon enough.


	16. Pt2 07) Burning bridges

**Part Two: His Secret**

**Chapter Seven: Burning bridges**

The events of the past ten days had been such a whirlwind for Kari Kamiya, that she could scarcely believe that so much time had passed when she woke up on Monday morning of a week later. At school, after her long conversation with Yolei on Tuesday, the pair had slotted back into their old friendship like the last year had never happened. Well, almost. When they had met up in homeroom the following day, they had started the process of getting each other up to speed on their lives from the in-between time. Or at least Yolei had. Kari, on the other hand, had said there was little she wanted to share, due to having been severely depressed for the duration. However, she had taken the opportunity to explain that she hated chick films, loved clothes from h.NAOTO, now listened to instrumental music and was a crack shot with a green turtle shell.

Following that, she’d spoke with Davis, who had said, _“no sweat,” _without the need for an explanation. She had given it to him anyway; the same version of the truth she’d told Yolei. It had been necessary in order for her to ask him to forgive TK. After some thought and a few questions, he had agreed. However, on the condition that TK first apologised to her. While that would not likely happen, it was at least a start. She had briefly spoken to Cody too and between herself and Yolei, arranged for the four of them plus Ken to meet up the weekend after next. If she had not personally lived through it, Kari would not have believed any of this possible when sitting by the river ten days ago. Even her mom had cooled down slightly over the whole hair issue; dinner plus alcohol having helped settle her mood. She still hated her daughter's hair and wardrobe choices, but Kari reckoned she might eventually come around. All in all, things could not possibly have been better in her life. However, one problem still persisted; TK. She had given it a lot of thought over the weekend and decided that the time had come to confront him.

Kari walked through the deserted hallway to the classroom the creative writing group used for their weekly after school meeting. Yolei had suggested it as a good time and place to find TK, for it would give her some privacy should things go south. While Davis had offered to come along as back up, just in case TK got nasty and tried to ‘lay his hands’ on her again. She had declined the offer. This was something she needed to do by herself. Coming to a stop outside an empty room, Kari took a few steadying breaths. In truth, she did not expect this to go well. In fact, she would probably consider TK opening his mouth to tell her to fuck off a success. At least that way he would have bothered to speak to her; something he had not done in over a year. In the deathly silence of the empty corridor, she waited.

Five minutes passed before a door slightly further down the hallway opened and a few individuals wandered out. Bracing herself, Kari took a few tentative steps forward. A moment later the blonde hair of Takeru Takaishi appeared through the doorway, mid-conversation with someone she did not recognise. Here goes nothing…

“TK,” Kari called out.

She saw the boy visibly stiffen, look at his friend and say, “I’ll catch up with you.” He then turned around to face her. His expression, usually so light and cheerful, had been twisted into one of sour contempt. “What do you want, Kamiya?” he barked at her, perhaps hoping to scare her off.

Kari, well prepared for this eventuality, stood her ground. “I wanted to talk to you.”

“Yeah, TK scoffed, “well now you have, so leave me alone.” Hearing his words she could not help but feel like she was talking to his older brother Matt. So cold and offhandedly uncaring that they were. Not at all like the tender, caring person she knew him to be. He turned to walk away.

“TK,” she called out as she quickly closed the distance between them, “I need to talk to you.”

The boy let out a snort of derision, “it’s a little late for that, Kamiya.”

“That’s not what I wanted to talk about,” Kari replied firmly, not letting his abrasive tone repel her. “I’m sorry for what happened between us and I can’t apologise enough for breaking your heart but…”

TK spun around his normally soft blue eyes ablaze with fury. “You’re damn right you can’t apologise enough!”

Kari sucked in a slow breath as she met his gaze; reddish-brown vs icy blue. She had hated herself more than enough over the past year that nothing he could say would possibly make her feel worse. So if that was his intention, he would be sorely disappointed. “You’re not going to hurt me, TK. I know you still feel angry and I understand why you might want to hurt me, but it’s not going to work. I’m sorry for breaking your heart and I’m sorry for not telling you sooner. However, I was too scared to… too weak.”

“Yeah, you were. And even when you did finally decide to rip my heart out, you were too weak to tell me the real reason why. So go on, Kamiya, why don’t you tell me now. I’m listening.”

Kari could see in TK’s eyes the pain, the hurt… the anger that still haunted him one year on. Only time had caused it to fester. And, from his perspective, not knowing the truth was central to it. Regardless, whether he would believe it or not, she had told him the truth. Minus, of course, the identity of the person she was in love with. Involuntarily, Kari felt her fists clench and the feelings of anger that she had felt towards him for refusing to accept the truth slowly rise from their grave. “What I told you that night was true, TK. I had fallen in love with someone else.”

“Don’t give me that bullshit, Kamiya,” he replied hotly. “You shacked up with Davis a few weeks later, but you clearly weren’t in love with him either as you ditched him quickly enough.”

“I was angry, TK,” Kari spat back. “While I might have been the one to break off our relationship, your refusal to believe the truth and what happened between you and Tai hurt me a lot. I was angry, stupid and reactionary. I wanted to hurt you and thought hooking up with Davis would do just that.”

“What, so breaking my heart wasn’t enough for you?”

Kari felt her body shake with rage upon hearing the accusation. It transpired that she had not fully worked through her feelings towards him, simply buried them beneath everything else she had felt over the past year in regards to her brother. “I never wanted to break your heart. Believe me, if I could have done things any other way I would have.”

“Then why didn’t you give me a chance to make things right?” A loud thud accompanied TK’s words as he slammed his fist against the wall. The boy’s shoulders had hunched over and Kari could hear his breathing come in laboured pants through gritted teeth. That must have hurt… a lot.

Without thinking, she moved to stand in front of him. “TK, your hand,” she exclaimed, the feelings of anger that had filled her moments prior washed away in a flood of compassion and concern. She reached out a hand and touched his shaking arm. “Here, let me help you.”

“I don’t want your help, Kamiya,” he barked, sounding much like she would imagine an injured dog would when cornered by someone it did not know.

There was a time when Kari would have instinctively shrank away from such a response and tried the calming from a distance approach. That would not work in this case. Using the voice she sometimes had to in order to rouse Tai from his slumber, she said, “Takeru Takaishi, stop being an idiot and let me look at that wrist!”

TK’s mouth fell open at hearing her authoritative, no-nonsense voice. While he remained stunned, Kari took the opportunity to take hold of his upper arm in a firm grip.

“OW! That hurt,” he grimaced when she rotated his wrist. He tried to pull away, but she refused to relinquish her grip. “AH!”

“I think you might have broken your wrist,” Kari then said after manipulating the joint a few more times to the sound of grimaced hissing.

Again TK tried to free his arm. “It’ll be fine.”

“You’re right,” Kari replied airily, then shifted her tone back to one of authority, “it will be fine. Once I take you to get it checked over.”

“Why are you doing this?” TK asked as she used her free hand to take off her sailor collar.

“Because contrary to what you might think, I don’t hate you and I certainly don’t want to see you in pain.” Slipping his forearm through the collar, Kari undid the knot and then re-tied it behind his neck. “The school nurse will probably already have gone home, so we’ll have to go to the emergency room.”

Taking a firm grip on his free hand, Kari led him down the hallway and towards the nearest exit. He tried to shrug her off but to no avail. She was used to dragging her brother out of bed or to the shower and he was a lot bigger and stronger than TK.

“I can manage by myself, Kari,” the boy protested for the umpteenth time when they finally left the school building.

She let out a small chuckle.

Her response seemed to get his dander up again for he barked, “what’s so funny?”

“You called me Kari,” she replied in amusement.

The look that spread across his face told her that he hadn’t even realised that he’d done it. “Yeah, well so what, Kamiya.”

His forced use of her family name caused her to burst out laughing.

“Knock it off! It’s not funny!”

“It’s perfectly funny,” Kari replied sweetly.

“And why’s that?”

She gave him a smile, “because it means that you don’t hate me as much as you think.”

He looked her straight in the eyes and though she could see that he wanted to and replied, “I’m pretty sure I do,” Kari knew he was lying to both of them.

“You forget how well I know you, TK,” she said as she matched his stare. “Whether you want to admit it or not, deep down you still care about me.”

He broke off the stare and they walked in silence for a while. However, slowly Kari could feel the resistance in his arm begin to wane. Eventually, when they were in sight of the hospital, TK spoke once more. “I never stopped loving you, Kari.”

She turned and looked up at him, surprised that he’d actually been willing to admit it.

However, his eyes were fixed dead ahead. “But believe me when I say that I tried.”

She felt his hand grip her own, though detected no malice.

“I tried everything to forget about you, Kari, everything. Spending time with friends, dating other girls… listening to Matt’s band in the hopes that their sheer noise would drive you from my mind. I even wrote a short story about you that I’m… not proud of.”

Kari raised her free hand and turned his cheek so that he faced her. “You had every right to hate me. I led you down a false trail because I was too scared to admit to you that I didn’t feel the same way.”

TK said nothing as they made their way inside the building. At the front desk, they spoke to the attendant who directed them to the waiting area.

“You don’t need to wait with me,” TK said as he found an empty chair.

“It’s the least I can do,” Kari replied as she sat down beside him. “It was technically my fault.”

The silence between them was uncomfortable, but she shouldn’t have expected it to be anything other. Had he not injured his hand, TK would probably have left soon after hitting the wall. After about fifteen minutes a doctor came over and escorted them to an exam room. A quick examination revealed that it was indeed broken. After which the doctor decided to send the boy for an X-ray.

“I’ll be fine from here, Kari,” TK said as the doctor indicated for him to follow. “I’ll call Matt to come pick me up once I’m done.”

“Are you sure?” she asked. TK nodded and handed her back her sailor collar. Kari took it from him and re-tied it around her neck. “It was nice talking to you again,” she then said as he turned to walk away. “If you like, the old gang are going to hang out on Saturday if you want to come.” It was a long shot to ask him, but it had been the motivation to talk to him again.

“...Sorry, I’m busy,” he replied without turning back around to look at her.

Kari hung her head. “Ok...” she said glumly as she watched him walk away.

When he disappeared from view, she turned and made her way back out of the hospital. As she walked back to school to fetch her bike, she played the whole conversation between them over in her head. They had both gotten angry and had it not been for his fit of rage, things would probably have turned ugly. And while it was clear that TK still loved her, he held a lot of hate and resentment too. By the time she reached her destination, Kari was unsure whether the conversation had helped matters, or if any future effort would simply turn into the fight fate had somehow prevented today. Maybe some bridges were destined to remain burned.


	17. Pt2 08) Wot's... uh the deal

**Part Two: His Secret**

**Chapter Eight: Wots… uh the deal**

The weekend had come around again and while this week had been a marked improvement in terms of schoolwork, Tai Kamiya had found himself with bigger things to worry about. The whole Kari situation having been increasingly playing on his mind these past seven days. To the point that numerous times he’d been so lost in thought over her that he’d missed several minutes of the outside world. Needless to say, the occasions when it had occurred in class or on the soccer field had got him into trouble. Not only had it become a real inconvenience, but worse yet, he was starting to worry about himself and his feelings. Only so much could be put down to being a caring and concerned brother. Especially when you had sat in the lunchroom the previous day and compared each of the girls looks to those of your sister; none had bested her.

Tai sat back on his bed and watched as the sister in question rifled through his wardrobe. Today was Saturday, the day on which Teiko had arranged their date. However, as the week had progressed he had come to view it more like his potential salvation. If anything could dispel the feelings he may or may not be having, it would be a date with a pretty, fun-loving girl like her. Unfortunately, Kari had taken a vested interest in the outcome and had marched him back into his bedroom after he had emerged wearing something she deemed ‘unsuitable’. She had then proceeded to delve into his wardrobe. With the only small mercy being that she had not demanded he strip… at least not yet.

“Try these on,” Kari said as he held out a pair of black jeans.

Tai looked between his sister and the article of clothing. “Are you going to step outside while I do?” he asked, already guessing the answer.

“Nope. It’ll take far too long if I have to keep going in and out while you try things on.”

He looked her in the eyes and met with an uncompromising stare. When had she become so accretive? Groaning, he stood up and snatched the jeans from her. Not bothering to ask her to turn around while he pulled off the blue pair he currently wore and changed into the black ones. Like a lioness circling her pray, Kari stalked around him, eyes roving up and down. He watched her pause to consider for a moment before she let out a, “hmmm,” sound and then went back to his closet.

“We really need to update your wardrobe, Brother,” she declared, as she pulled out various articles of upper body attire to glance at in the light, before putting them back.

“What’s wrong with it” he retorted.

“It’s mostly sporty clothing and blue jeans. I’m lucky it’s only a fair you’re going to. Otherwise, I’d probably have to drag you out for an emergency shopping trip.”

He gave her a grumpy pout when she next turned around, “there’s nothing wrong with sporty stuff!”

Kari pulled out a casual short-sleeved red and black checked shirt with a grey hood. “There’s plenty wrong with it if you’re going somewhere other than the gym or to play soccer,” she replied, stepping forward and holding the shirt up against his body. “Next time we have money, I’m taking you clothes shopping.”

“You’re beginning to sound like mom.”

Kari gave him one of what was quickly becoming a trademark devilish smile. “Mom would never take you into h.NAOTO if you’re a good boy.”

Tai froze at the thought of his sister leading him around her favourite store and picking out a new wardrobe for him. She wouldn’t... his chocolate eyes met those bright reddish-brown orbs and he saw the gleam in them... she would. “Good thing you’ve pre-warned me then so I know not to go into town with you again.”

“I know you too well, Tai Kamiya. The promise of a good meal will have you begging me to take you shopping,” Kari replied before shooting him another evil look. “Now lose the t-shirt.”

Tai complied without protest. Why was he letting her boss him around like this? Internally he sighed. Kari was enjoying herself and for some reason, he could not take that away from her. In fact, he could not help but feel that he would do whatever she asked if it would make her happy. Even allowing her to drag him round h.NAOTO while she dressed him like she would a doll. Though he had no intention of telling her that and losing out on one of her home-cooked dinners. He frowned internally. Why did he feel this way?

“Arms up,” Kari commanded as she stepped behind him, shirt in hand.

Tai again did so without question and felt the shirt being slipped over each arm in turn. “I can do this myself, you know,” he uttered, feeling the need to at least say something.

“You already did and looked a mess,” his sister retorted as she stepped around him and began pressing the studs of the shirt closed. “Besides, this way is much more fun.”

“For you maybe.”

She finished with the shirt and took a step back. Tai watched her cock her head in contemplation. “Now what?” he asked, wondering what else she could possibly do.

“I’m pondering whether or not I should rip those jeans,” she replied offhandedly.

Tai looked at her with a mixture of intrigue and horror, “what!”

“So they look like these,” Kari said, indicated the black jeans that she was wearing. “I couldn’t afford to buy a pair like this, so I bought a cheap plain pair and did it myself. It’s not hard.”

“It’s not exactly my style, Kari.”

“True, but it is Teiko’s. And I’ll bet that she’ll appreciate you making the effort. You want this to go well, don’t you?”

He thought for a moment. Teiko’s style certainly seemed to be along similar lines to that of his sister’s new one. It appeared that from only a brief encounter, Kari had a firmer grasp on his friend than he did. That and she was right. He did want this to go well… needed it to go well. He shook his head. Why did he get the feeling that at some unknown point further down the line he was going to regret this? “You’re the boss, Sis.”

Kari flashed him a wicked smile and he could see the evil glint in her eyes. “Take them off and I’ll be back with my stuff.”

She left the room, leaving Tai alone to take off the jeans. He turned them over in his hands. It was not as if they were his favourite pair. In fact, he barely wore them. Resuming his position on the bed, he waited for Kari to return. After a few minutes, she came back with a thick sheet of cardboard and a Stanley knife. With a hint reluctance, he held the jeans out to her. His sister took them from his outstretched hand and he watched as she got to work. After about fifteen minutes, Kari stood up from the floor and removed the sheet of cardboard from the second leg.

“What do you think?” she asked, holding them up for him to appraise.

Had Tai not just watched his sister work on them, he would have said the jeans had been bought like that. Two diagonal slashes had been cut into the right leg. While the left had one on the lower half, the knee cut open and frayed, plus a large patch where she’d scratched the surface of the denim but not cut all the way through on the upper section.

“That you might want to consider some sort of career doing this sort of thing.”

She smiled at him, “nah, this is defiantly just a hobby. Although I’ll admit I’m kind of jealous because they’ve turned out better than my own.” Kari held them out beside her own so that he could see the difference. “Do you like them?”

“I think they might actually grow on me,” he replied truthfully. While he had never pictured himself wearing something like that, he did not find them objectionable.

He held out a hand as he stood up and took the jeans from Kari. Having to take care to avoid the newly made holes, Tai slipped them on. A glance in the mirror revealed that he actually looked quite good. It seemed hobby or not, that his sister knew what she was doing.

“Let me have a look at you,” Kari then said and he turned to face her. “Much better, don’t you think?”

“It’s not as bad as I thought it would be,” he laughed. “You’re not going to try and dye my hair next?”

“Don’t tempt me,” she replied with another wicked grin. “Now wear your black boots, not those smelly trainers.”

He watched as Kari’s eyes scanned his bedroom. What was she searching for now? He was about to ask when she walked passed him towards his desk. From a hook on the wall, he saw her retrieve his crest of courage pendant. Moving back to stand in front of him, she reached up and slipped it around his neck.

“Something personal to finish the look,” she commented as she stepped back, looked him up and down then nodded her head.

Tai thumbed the wooden pendent and found himself tracing the orange star with his finger. Something inside told him that he was going to need his courage very soon. While it may simply have been a piece of carved and smoothed wood, the pendant still symbolised his strongest trait. Giving him something physical to clutch when he needed it most.

As if reading his mind, Kari then said, “while they may not be real, they still represent a part of who we are. Something that we cannot rid ourselves of, no matter how hard we try. And trust me, I tried.”

Tai gave her a quizzical look, “you tried to rid yourself of your light?”

“Two weeks ago I was at my lowest point. I sat on the river bank and could not find a speck of light inside me. I wanted so badly just to throw my pendant in, to be rid of what I thought was a cruel joke, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it.” She let out a chuckle, “or maybe I just put too much importance on a piece of carved wood.”

Tai looked at his sister and the crest of light pendant that she now wore openly once more. “Your light never left you,” he said reassuringly.

“It came pretty close. Now you had better leave or you’re going to be late.”

He glanced at the clock and saw that she was right. Being late would not leave a good first impression. As he headed for his bedroom door, Kari called out to him, “forgetting something?”

Tai turned his head to see a short black jacket hanging on one of her outstretched fingers. With a flick of her wrist, she tossed it over to him. He caught it mid-air and smiled as she joined him in leaving his bedroom. She followed him to the front door, perhaps to make sure he didn’t put on his ‘smelly’ trainers. Forcing his feet into the black boots he laced them tight and then stood up straight.

“Perfect,” Kari commented and then gave him a hug. “Have fun and say hello for me.”

“I will,” he replied and then left the apartment.

When the door closed behind him, Tai let out a breath that he had not been aware of holding. In the back of his head, he knew that a part of him wished that Kari was coming with him. He quickly buried it as deep as possible. but an impression of it still lingered by the time he was descending the stairs. At this rate, he could only hope that Teiko had put as much effort into preparing for their date as his sister had with him. For he had a sinking feeling that it would take something special to drive Kari from his mind.

##

Tai walked slowly through the mingling crowds, glancing aimlessly at some of the fair stalls he passed. Dressed in a short vinyl skirt that literally looked like an old record, a white and black halter top and knee-length black boots, Teiko clung to his right arm. Her fingers interlocked with his own. As predicted, she had commented on his outfit and how it was a marked improvement over his usual sporty look. However, she had smelled Kari’s hand in it a mile off and found it quite amusing. Suggesting that he should let his sister dress him all the time. He’d laughed at this and told her what had happened in his bedroom earlier that evening. Afterwards, she’d decided that both Kari and herself were going to take him shopping. His fate seemed to be sealed now. For there would be no chance of him escaping both girls.

Unfortunately, that had been the high point of the evening so far; for him at any rate. Sure they had laughed and joked as they wandered around the fair. She’d beat him in a shooting gallery then lost at a test your strength game. He had then won her a stuffed animal at a soccer game. And while they had been having a good time, Tai could not help but feel like they were two close friends having fun together. Indeed, having her hanging off his arm felt strange and a little uncomfortable, truth be told.

There was a whole section of world food stalls at the fair and so they stopped at an interesting German one, where he bought a giant hotdog called a Bratwurst for them to share. Finding an empty bench that overlooked the river, they sat down with their two-foot monstrosity and had a rather amusing time trying to eat it from opposite ends. When they reached the centre, both parties took hold of their end with their teeth and a playful tussle ensued as they fought over who got the last bite. Using the dirty tactic of kicking him in the shin, Teiko emerged the victor.

Tai pouted at the unfair way that he had been bested, “cheat.”

Teiko removed the spoils from her mouth and replied, “just because you didn’t think to do that.”

The look of disappointment must have shown on his face, for she placed the last bite of hotdog back between her teeth and beckoned with a seductive finger for him to come and take it. Tai leaned forward and reached out for the scrap with his teeth. His lips brushed against her soft ones as she relinquished her hold. He felt an arm wrap itself around his waist as he chewed, then swallowed. It then snaked its way up to the back of his neck. Slowly, Teiko pulled him towards her. Their lips touched and he could taste the saltiness of the Bratwurst. They felt warm and he could detect a trace of the hunger that filled her amber eyes. She wanted him, that much was evident. Only after a few moments, his brain told him that, while this felt good, it did not compare to the kiss Kari had given him. Involuntarily he pulled away, breaking the connection they shared. He couldn’t do this...

“What’s wrong?” Teiko asked, looking slightly surprised by his reaction.

“Nothing... I...”

“Don’t give me that, Kamiya. I know you too well.”

Tai looked at her blankly, “give you what?”

The girl's facial expression clearly read, _“really?”_ However, before he could reply, she said, “you were about to lie to me, pretend that nothing is wrong.”

Tai sighed, she really did know him too well. “I’m sorry, Teiko. But this doesn’t feel right.”

The girl looked him straight in the eyes, the setting sun making her spikey turquoise hair glisten. “So who’s the lucky lady?”

He blinked in confusion, “what lucky lady?”

She laughed, “I’ve dated a couple of boys and a couple of girls over the past few years who had the exact same look in their eyes as you do right now. You know what they all had in common?” When he failed to respond, she continued, “they all wished they had just been kissing someone else. So who is she?”

Tai turned to face the river, unable to look into those bright amber eyes any longer. “Sorry but you’re wrong.”

Teiko let out an amused snort, “don’t play dumb with me, Kamiya. Is it Takenouchi?”

“No,” he replied without even thinking. The smile he received told him that he’d just taken the bait. So instead he tried a different approach, “I don’t want to talk about it.”

He stared at the slow-moving current of the river. How had this happened, he wondered? How could he have fallen in love with Kari? While part of his brain desperately wanted to deny it, cling to the delusion that it was untrue, he knew it would be pointless. Like drops of water from a leaky tap filling a glass, the realisation had been slowly rising since his knee jerk reaction to the revelation that she was in love with him. This date with Teiko had simply finished filling the glass. With the kiss, serving only to send water running down the sides.

“Hey, Kamiya? You ok?”

A hand waved in front of Tai’s face and he snapped out of his musings. He turned his head to find Teiko staring at him with a concerned look on her face.

“Sorry,” he replied hastily.

“You were thinking about her, weren’t you.”

He let out a sigh and nodded. “I’m sorry, Teiko.”

The girl gave him one of her more tender smiles, “don’t worry about it. So, who is she?”

“I already told you, I don’t want to talk about it.”

“You should, talking helps,” the girl said, taking one of his hands in hers. “Do you remember back in middle school, the conversation we had when I told you I thought I liked girl’s as well as boy’s?”

Tai found himself compelled to look into those bright amber eyes. He could recall the conversation in perfect detail. “I was the first person you ever told.”

“Yes,” Teiko replied, giving his hand a squeeze. “You were the first person I told because I needed to talk to someone and I trusted you, Tai. I trusted that you would be understanding and not hostile about it.” She looked deep into his chocolate eyes, “the question now is, do you trust me?”

He let out a slow breath. Teiko had trusted him with something personal that she felt she could not tell anyone else, was he willing to do the same? Would it help to say it out loud? To talk about it with the only person who might not find him repulsive. Excluding Kari herself, of course. She was a whole different problem that he could not even begin to contemplate yet.

“Talk to me, Tai.”

He lowered his head. Here goes nothing. “It’s Kari… I’m in love with my own sister.”

Silence. In the background, his brain registered the sounds of people walking, talking, laughing and all the other goings-on at the fair. But he did not hear them. All he heard was the deathly quiet that hung in the air between himself and Teiko. After a moment, he did not know how long, he felt one of her slender fingers reach out and lift his chin. Her eyes were bright and showed no signs of repulsion. And a thin smile played on her lips.

“I suppose that makes sense,” Teiko said softly.

Confusion spread across Tai’s face. Why was she not telling him that he was sick, twisted? “Why?” was all he managed to utter.

A warm chuckle escaped from the girl's lips. “You used to talk about her all the time. Don’t you remember? All those stories about things you did together. All those times you shielded her from your mom when you guys got in trouble?”

Tai thought for a moment. He did remember. He used to talk about Kari all the time and not just with Teiko. Virtually every girl he had dated he had talked to about his sister. Telling them how great she was or about things they’d done when they were younger.

When he failed to respond, Teiko continued, “then you text me out of the blue to call in your favour for her. Brought her along to Shockers and spent a fortune to get her exactly what she wanted. And all because you saw her look at some posters and you’d screwed up on her birthday.”

“You don’t think I’m sick?” was the only response Tai could utter.

“Of course not. You know I’m a firm believer that you can’t help who you fall in love with.” His confusion at her reaction must have shown for she let out an amused chuckle. “Besides, I’ve read more than my fair share of Shojo manga about brother-sister love stories.”

He couldn’t help but laugh. It should have come as no surprise that Teiko was ok with incest. The girl was about as liberal as you could get and he knew first hand just how much Shojo manga she had read. Having typically seen her with a magazine whenever he found her.

“So, do you think she feels the same way?”

The question hit Tai like a bolt of lightning, but somehow he managed to keep his voice neutral, “no.” He did not like the fact that he had just lied to Teiko, especially giving how understanding she’d just been. However, he had promised Kari he would not tell anyone about how she felt. That was her secret, not his.

“Are you sure?” Teiko asked, sounding slightly disappointed.

“Definitely,” he answered firmly.

The girl gave his hand a light squeeze, “that’s a shame. You two would have made a really cute couple.”

Teiko reached over and pulled Tai into a hug. In the warmth of her embrace, he began to ask himself the million-dollar question, what should he do now?


	18. Pt2 09) The lost art of conversation

**Part Two: His Secret**

**Chapter Nine: The lost art of conversation**

Kari watched as the apartment door closed behind her brother and let out a slow breath. Seeing Tai semi-naked and then dressed in something more punky had been quite stirring. A thought about going to her room for some alone time crossed her mind, but a quick glance at the living room clock told her that would have to wait for later. For she was due to meet her friends in just over half an hour. Instead, she went to the bathroom, found her tub of wax and messed up her hair. Having already dressed in her black jeans, green weirdo t-shirt and black choker, she just had to collect her denim jacket and decide on footwear and she would be ready to go.

In her bedroom, she took said jacket from the wardrobe followed by what had once been a pair of white converse. However, two cans of spray paint had rendered them half black, half neon yellow. Fetching her music player from her desk, she put her headphones on, found Ommadawn on the device and pocketed it. Lastly, she picked up a small backpack into which she put her purse a hairbrush and the tub of wax. Her headphones were liable to flatten part of her hair and so she might need to reapply. Leaving her room, Kari walked to the apartment door, put on her converse and left.

Outside, the sun was slowly beginning its descent and although the sky was relatively cloud-free the air temperature had noticeably dropped compared to that of two weeks prior. Autumn it seemed was in full swing now. Walking down to stairs to street level, Kari set off towards the pancake shop where she had agreed to meet the others. It felt almost surreal, she mused, leaving the house to go hang out with friends. She hadn’t done this since last Halloween, almost a full year ago. However, that did not mean that she had not gone out. In order to make her family think that everything was still normal, she’d taken to going out once or twice a week under the guise of meeting friends. Instead, she would fully charge her music player and leave to wander the streets for a couple of hours, often going to sit in a park or a coffee house somewhere. On weekends she’d go into town to buy a CD or something from h.NAOTO. She’d even went as far to take the train further into Tokyo and visit Harajuku street.

Walking for about fifteen minutes, Kari arrived outside the pancake shop and stepped inside. In a booth beside the window, she spied Yolei and Ken. Shifting her headphones down so they sat around her neck, she walked towards them. Laughing internally when Ken looked up and his eyes passed right over her. Apparently, Yolei had neglected to tell him about her new hairdo. A grin flashed across her face as an idea formed in her mind. Reaching the table she slid into the booth beside him.

“Umm, can I help you?” Ken asked

She did not turn to look at him, instead made eye contact with Yolei who not only managed to keep a straight face but actually managed to look slightly taken aback. “You looked bored. I thought I’d drop in and show you a good time,” she said seductively, masking her own voice.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw the boy’s cheeks turn red. “I’m here with my girlfriend,” he stammered. 

She stifled a grin. Let’s see if she could turn this up to eleven before he realised. “She doesn’t seem to mind,” Kari replied as she ran a hand over his leg.

Ken practically leapt sideways towards the window, but she followed him. Bearing down on him, she gave him a wicked smile as she gazed into his eyes, “boo!”

From across the table, Yolei burst out laughing as the boy looked into her eyes. “Kari?” he asked, sounding like he did not believe his own.

“Long time no see, Ken,” she replied as she stood up and moved around to the opposite side to sit with Yolei.

“You look… different,”

“She looks amazing,” Yolei commented as she reached over to give her a hug. “Nice to see you, Kari.”

They broke off the hug and she turned back to Ken, “and you’re supposed to be observant too.”

“In fairness, it’s been almost a year and you look markedly different,” he said defensively.

She laughed and pointed to her crest of light, “know someone else that wears one of these?”

Ken’s eyes fell on the wooden pendant, but it was Yolei that answered for him, “you had him that flustered from the moment you spoke to him, he wouldn’t have recognised his own reflection.”

“I wasn’t that flustered!”

“Your face lit up like my hair, or at least it did after I rubbed my hand down your leg.”

He opened his mouth to argue, but Yolei again beat him to the punch, “so you let other girl’s rub their hands all over you, do you?” she said hotly.

A look of panic quickly covered his face, “I didn’t… it wasn’t like… Kari tell her!”

Both girls burst out laughing at the scene before them. Unfortunately, for them at least, they were denied their two on one advantage by the appearance of Davis.

“Hey guys,” he said by way of a greeting. Kari watched as his gaze fell upon Ken, “what’s wrong with him?”

“He’s just worried about what Yolei plans to do to him later on.” She mockingly raised a hand to block her voice from travelling in the lavender haired girl’s direction. “He’s been letting other girls touch him.”

“Ken, buddy, I didn’t think you had it in you.” Davis gave the other boy a light punch in the arm and sat down beside him. “Only you’re not supposed to let your girlfriend find out.”

“She was sitting right here when it happened!” Ken replied.

Kari raised a hand to stifle her laughter. Much like Izzy, for all of his intellect, Ken had a habit of putting his foot in it once flustered in a social situation.

“Dude, you don’t do that sort of thing **in front** of the girlfriend. That’s just plain suicide!”

“Know that from personal experience, Davis,” Kari asked with a sly grin.

“I’ll have you know I’m an upstanding boyfriend.” She gave him a pointed look and he quickly backtracked slightly, “most of the time. Anyway, Ken’s the one on trial here, not me.”

“It’s not my fault Yolei **forgot **to tell me about Kari’s new look.”

“Must have slipped my mind,” Yolei said airily.

Davis winced and edged away from Ken. “Dude, you never blame the girlfriend for… well, anything! You seriously need to get a copy of relationships for guy’s 101. It must be the only book you haven’t read.”

“That makes two of you,” Kari laughed.

“Hey, I’ve…” Davis began but quickly stopped when she gave him another pointed look. He then looked between her and Ken. “What’s Kari got to do with all of this?”

“I didn’t recognise her when she sat down and thought she was some stranger,” Ken answered.

“I may then have proceeded to have a little fun with him,” she laughed.

“It wasn’t funny,” Ken replied, still sounding flustered at the whole affair.

“It was pretty funny from where I was sitting,” Yolei giggled.

“What was pretty funny?” a new voice said from the outside edge of the table.

Kari, along with everyone else turned to look at the final member to arrive; Cody.

“Ken’s been letting other women touch him in front of his girlfriend!” Davis said before Ken had the chance to explain.

“Didn’t he read relationships for guy’s 101?” Cody asked.

At this Ken virtually exploded, “Kari caught me unawares because Yolei didn’t tell me about her new look!”

The new arrival let out a hiss, “you should never blame your girlfriend for anything.”

The rest of the group, minus Ken, burst out into an uncontrollable fit of hysterics. When she could eventually see straight once more, Kari saw the look of confusion on Cody’s face. “It wasn’t that funny, was it?” he asked as he sat down beside Davis.

“Yes.”

Ken’s sole response of, “no,” drew another bout of laughter.

Only once everyone was seated and slightly more settled did Kari remember that she still had her headphones on around her neck. Slipping them off, she put them safely inside her backpack along with her music player. She waited until Yolei had finished explaining the full story to Cody and Davis before saying, “should we order?”

“Shouldn’t we wait for TK?” Ken asked.

“He didn’t want to come,” Yolei said.

“Yeah, trust him to be the party pooper,” Davis chipped in.

“He had a perfectly good reason to say no,” Kari said softly, “We shouldn’t hold it against him.”

“Why are you defending him?” Davis retorted. “Out of everyone here, you should be the last one doing that.”

“While he might have hurt me, I hurt him a lot more. He has every right to avoid socialising with me.”

“I want to know what happened to his wrist,” Cody said before she had the chance to change the subject. “I heard someone ask him about it and he told them to mind their own business. That’s not like him.”

Kari bit her lip but remained silent. She hadn’t told anyone, save for Yolei who had put two and two together the day after it had happened and, as always, came up with four. Fortunately, she did not have to worry about the lavender haired girl saying anything as she had already asked her not to.

“Let’s order,” Yolei then said, bringing the conversation back to where it started.

A cursory glance at the menu was all Kari required to make her choice; two pancakes with banana and blueberries, accompanied by a grape soda. A waitress came over and took their order, after which conversation turned to the obvious; her. Fortunately, Yolei had already been armed with enough knowledge that she was able to answer half the questions on her behalf. Everything from her shoes, the odd detail which Ken had noticed, up to her hair was asked about, along with her more internal changes.

“I still wouldn’t rule out an evil Digimon in disguise,” Ken eventually said, once everyone seemed satisfied with what they had been told. “This new look Kari has an evil streak.”

They all laughed, however, he was essentially correct, Kari thought. About the evil streak, not the Digimon part. It amused her somewhat to think about it in such terms. Some of the jokes, the commentary, the whole business with Ken… the way she acted around Tai. She’d never had the confidence to act this way before. To be so bold. Yet, it had not been a conscious choice on her part to do so. It seemed that having suppressed herself for so long, to the point she was little more than a grey blur, had led to her having little clue about her personality. It seemed that the quick succession in which she’d changed her outside wardrobe, had her hair dyed and then the burden of her secret lifted, had opened her up to trying new things. So far she knew that old Kari’s selflessness had been turned down a few notches, that she had a newfound desire to make herself happy and, of course, the manifestation of the evil streak. That last being a personal favourite.

“Or an evil twin,” Davis offered up as an alternative.

Kari gave Davis an ice-cold look, tilted her head and then said in a soft monotone, “or maybe I just snapped.” She then held his gaze, unblinking.

The boy visibly backed into his seat. “Ok, so you can be really creepy now, Kari,” he said as he rubbed the back of his head with a hand.

She made him sweat for a few seconds more before laughing.

“As the bearer of the Digi-egg of courage, you really do lack backbone, Davis,” Yolei then said as she joined Kari in her laughter.

“To be fair, she did look quite creepy,” Cody offered in way of support for Davis.

“Agreed,” Ken added. “I wouldn’t want to get on your bad side now.”

Kari pondered this notion for a moment. She’d never had a ‘bad’ side before. In fact, Sora was the only person she could recall lashing out at and even that had been a spur of the moment decision brought about by an uncontrollable burst of anger. It remained to be seen whether or not new Kari had a ‘bad’ side. And she suspected it would only be revealed when someone crossed her.

Their food arrived and the conversation quickly turned to school, then through topics such as movies, music and other such things. When it reached video games, she cheerfully dropped the turtle shell that she had kicked Tai’s butt twice at Mario Kart and then at Killer Instinct. The latter of which, while they had agreed to call it a draw, she claimed victory in as she had technically won the most individual rounds.

“There is no way you beat Tai,” Davis declared in defence of his idol.

“Want to put that to the test,” Kari challenged, metaphorically throwing down the gauntlet.

“You’re damn right I do,” the boy retorted. “I can’t have you spreading such lies and sullying your brother’s reputation.”

She gave him a smile, “ok, if you insist.”

“Fine, my place once we’re done here.”

Kari looked around at the rest of the group. “Are you guys ok with watching me shove a green turtle shell up Davis’ backside after this?”

“I’ll happily watch you make him cry,” Yolei replied a little too enthusiastically.

Cody sighed and shook his head, “he won’t shut up till you do so why not.”

“Way to have faith in me, Cody,” Davis replied hotly.

“I’m afraid I’ll have to pass,” Ken then said. “I’ll have to leave to catch my train home after this.”

“Aww man, I was going to name you my second,” Davis exclaimed.

Yolei laughed, “what in case Kari pounds you into the ground after only one race and you need someone to finish for you.”

“There is no way she’s going to beat me!”

Kari turned to Ken, “we’ll walk you to the station first,” she said before rounding her gaze on Davis, “before I go find a new home for my turtle shells.”

“You are so going down, Kamiya.”

They finished their food then rose to leave. At the cash desk, Yolei insisted on paying for her. Owing to the fact she’d made Kari buy her a crepe the previous week. They then walked Ken to the station before starting the journey over to Davis’ house. It had been a thoroughly enjoyable evening so far, with the only blemish being the absence of TK. So much so that Kari scarcely gave a passing thought to Tai and how his date with Teiko was going. After so much time alone it was nice to be with her friends.


	19. Pt2 10) What shall we do now

**Part Two: His Secret**

**Chapter Ten: What shall we do now**

The sun had set and the streets were now bathed in the soft orange glow of the various sidewalk lamps. Having taken Teiko home, Tai Kamiya trudged back to his own, mind racing. His acceptance of being in love with his own sister had fully set in the moment he had uttered the words to the turquoise haired girl. They had spoken about it for a bit. Except that missing out the key detail that Kari loved him in return had resulted in the discussion doing little other than reinforcing the realisation. However, the moment Teiko had closed the door the war had started inside his mind. If it had not been for a huge influx of self-control, he would have run all the way home, burst into Kari’s room and planted his lips upon her own; such was his desire to taste them again. Instead, his brain had started coming up with options.

Number one had obviously been to go home, tell her how he felt and promise her that somehow, someway they would be together. Option two had been similar to option one, except it involved him cautioning Kari about the difficulties a relationship might entail and talking the whole idea through to see how she felt about it. Three had also involved telling her but then saying that they could not act on their feelings and needed to find a way to suppress them. Lastly, number four was to say nothing and allow things to carry on as they were; Kari was happy after all.

By the time he reached the apartment building, he had managed to whittle away two options. Number three had been quickly rejected. The idea of telling his sister that he actually did love her in return, but that she had to go back to suppressing her feelings felt abhorrent. For he knew that saying that to her would probably break her heart. While it had taken longer, option one had been discarded too. It was pure fantasy to think that he could go into Kari’s room, profess his love for her and promise that they would be together no matter what. Real-life did not work like that and certainly not for incestuous relationships; even in Japan.

A thought pertaining to how their parents would react if they found out their children were in such a relationship crossed Tai’s mind as he started climbing the stairs and it was not pretty. Put lightly, neither of his parents were fans of that sort of shojo manga. Indeed their mother had flipped out over some hair dye. Regardless, he was left with options two and four. And he had no idea which to pick. The only thing he knew for certain was that he needed to talk to Kari. While she had told him that she was in love with him, she had not said anything about what she would have wanted if he had returned her love. It was not inconceivable that she had already thought about the risks of a relationship and decided what she would have wanted. But by the same virtue, it was entirely plausible that she had considered the possibility little more than a pipe dream and not given one iota of thought to the consequences. Either way, he needed to know where she stood before deciding what to do.

Tai inserted his keys into the lock and opened the apartment door. It was dark inside, an indication that his parents had decided on having an early night. Changing over his shoes, he walked lightly on the wooden floor until he found himself outside Kari’s room. He raised a hand to knock but stopped before his knuckles touched the woodwork. If she was already asleep he didn’t want to wake her. In fact, given that it was quite late, it might raise suspicion if he tried to talk to her now. And the last thing he needed was for her to be on her guard or worse, figure out his motives, before he had a chance to decide on what to do. He sent the signals to his legs to turn and walk away, accept they did not move. He let out a sigh, this could not wait. Lowering his hand, he gripped the handle and turned it slowly. Gently he pushed open the door and poked his head inside. A quick glance told him that the room was empty. While he found it strange, the only logical explanation was that she had gone out. Perfect, his brain thought. He could wait in the living room for her to come home and talk to her under the guise of being interested in where she had gone. It would also help that he genuinely wanted to know.

Walking away from his sister's room, Tai travelled to the kitchen and fetched two cans of soda from the fridge. Quietly making a detour to his bedroom to fetch his GameCube, he returned to the main living space and quickly hooked it up to the TV. Not only would it serve as a much-needed distraction until Kari came home, but if he could coax her into a round of Mario Kart, he could bring up the subject in a more natural, conversational manner. Turning the volume down low so as not to wake his parents, he set up his first game. After about twenty-five minutes, he heard the sound of the front door opening. Showtime.

Pausing his game, Tai glanced over his shoulder and saw Kari step into the apartment. She had spiked her hair up and put on her short denim jacket to go out he noticed; along with her headphones. For the first time, he allowed himself to look her up and down and lose himself in her beauty. Yesterday’s assessment of the girls in his school had been spot on. None of them could compare with his sister. When she looked over and saw him staring at her, he had to resist the urge to turn away. Making himself look suspicious straight off the bat would only put her on alert. Kari gave him a smile, pulled off her headphones and walked towards him.

“Hey, Sis, what are you listening to?” Tai asked quietly, electing to start with something completely innocuous.

Kari moved round to sit on the sofa beside him. “Wish You Were Here,” she replied, withdrawing her music player from a pocket and placing both it and her headphones on the coffee table. “I think I’m becoming obsessed with it.”

“Better than Mike Oldfield?” he asked.

Kari chuckled, “different, not better. They share similarities, but are very different.”

Hearing his sister laugh had always made Tai feel warm inside, for it indicated she was happy. Picking up the unopened can from the table he held it out to her, “soda?”

“Thanks,” she replied, taking it from him and promptly opening it.

While she took a drink he used the opportunity to ask, “so where were you?” and tried not to make it sound like an interrogation.

“Out,” she replied with a sweet smile.

He shook his head and laughed, “care to be a bit more specific?”

The devilish grin that he was starting to both enjoy and dread seeing spread across Kari’s face. “I’ll tell you what I was up to if you tell me all about your date with Teiko.”

In this instance, he found her catch to be a non-issue. Given her vested interest, Tai had already known that she would want all the details about his date. He’d already decided with Teiko that the official line on it would be that it had just been too weird for them to date after having been friends for so long. Kari would probably be disappointed that it hadn’t worked out, but depending on what he decided to do, she might soon forget about it. “Sounds fair,” he answered, then pointed at the TV. “You want to get your butt kicked while we talk?”

Kari reached out and picked up the second controller from the table. “I just whooped the backside of your mini doppelganger, might as well do the real thing too.”

Tai tilted his head as he gave her a quizzical look. He knew instantly that by ‘mini doppelganger’, she was referring to Davis. This definitely merited an explanation. “You were with Davis?” he asked as he started the game.

Eyes focused on the screen, Kari replied, “yep. Cody, Yolei and Ken too.”

His head involuntarily turned to look at her and he subsequently messed up his rocket start. “You were with the other DigiDestined?” He was forced to return his eyes to the TV or drive straight into the wall at the first corner.

Instead of an affirmative, his sister responded with, “how was Teiko?”

“She was fine. She said to say hi from her and asked if you still like your hair.” He had to negotiate a few sharp bends and dispatch an opponent before he could ask, “how did you manage to get the four of them together? I thought you and Yolei had a huge fallout and the others didn’t speak to you anymore?”

“I spoke with Yolei last week. We talked and I explained what happened last year with TK and about how I became seriously depressed afterwards. Then we made up.”

The news that Kari had managed to patch up some of her old friendships made Tai smile. His sister deserved to be happy after the hell she’d been through over the past two years and he knew how much her friends had meant to her. To have four of them talking to her and willing to hang out must have made her ecstatic. However, there was something he wished to know, “why didn’t you tell me about this last weekend?”

With the last corner in sight, he fired a red turtle shell from second place right at his sisters rear. It made contact and he slid around the corner and into the lead. Only for a green shell to whack right into his backside and Kari to whiz past him and across the line; bastard.

She turned and grinned at him, “so what did Teiko wear tonight?”

He gave her a sour look in response to the green shell, “knee-high leather boots, a short skirt that looked like a vinyl record and a white and black halter top.”

“Aww don’t look so mad, Bro. I’ve got plenty more green shells for you.” She gave him the sweet and innocent smile that always caused his annoyance to dissipate. And he had to resist the urge to wrap his arms around her and taste her soft lips. “I only spoke to them for the first time last week and I didn’t want to tell you in case I jinxed it.”

It made sense, Tai thought. Having not spoken to any of the younger DigiDestined in almost a year, she would undoubtedly have been apprehensive about telling him in case something went wrong. “I’m really glad that you guys are friends again.”

“Me too,” Kari replied, before asking, “so how did the date go?”

Tai let out a low sigh as the next race started and waited until it had gotten underway before responding, “it was fun, but…”

“…but?” his sister prompted when he failed to finish the sentence; partly due to overcooking a corner and having to fight tooth and nail not to fall off the track.

“It felt too weird,” Tai replied, recalling the kiss they had shared after the Bratwurst duel. “We kissed but we both knew it didn’t feel right. Guess we’ve been close friends for a little too long for it to work out.”

“Aww, that’s a shame,” Kari replied as she paused the game. Scooting over she put her arms around him and pulled him into a hug. “I’m sorry it didn’t work out for you guys.”

He returned the hug, feeling the warmth radiating from his sister and becoming acutely aware that her breasts were pressed up against his chest. When she shifted slightly, his hand slid down her t-shirt and his fingertips came into contact with the bare skin of her lower back. It felt so soft to his touch that he had to fight the urge to caress it. His heart skipped a beat and his resolve only held out by virtue of Kari sitting up straight and ending the hug.

“We’ll just have to find you someone else,” she then said as she picked up her gamepad once more.

“I guess so,” he sighed as the race restarted.

With so much going through his mind, he found it difficult to concentrate and Kari easily beat him again. It seemed that the price of conversation was going to be another chink out of his pride. As he thought about how to best ask his question, his sister dropped a metaphorical bombshell, “so I spoke with TK on Monday.”

The gamepad slipped from Tai’s hand and his mouth hung open as his head swivelled around to look at his sister. “You talked to that asshole?” he asked in amazement.

Kari paused the game and gave him an unprecedented hard look, “don’t call him that.”

“After how he treated you, you’re going to defend him?”

“I hurt him, Tai. I hurt him a lot and left him with little by way of an explanation,” she replied, a look of sorrow filling her reddish-brown eyes. “I didn’t realise how much pain he still felt until I spoke to him.”

He reached out and took one of her hands in his own. Giving it a light squeeze, he said, “that doesn’t excuse how he treated you. The way he grabbed you that day was despicable.”

“He was really upset and angry, Tai. And I don’t think he had any control over himself.”

He let out a snort as if to say, _“that’s no excuse,”_ but allowed her to continue.

“He didn’t want to speak to me at first, but I sort of didn’t give him the choice. It seems neither of us has properly gotten over it as we both got angry.”

Tai opened his mouth to say something threatening against the non-present boy but his sister raised a hand to indicated that she needed to finish first before he made any big-brother threats against TK’s wellbeing.

“He got that upset and angry that he punched the wall and broke his wrist. He calmed down a lot on the walk to the hospital.”

“You took him to the hospital?”

“Yeah. I couldn’t just leave him in pain like that. He opened up a bit more and said he’s tried everything he can think of to stop thinking about me, but nothing seems to work. I think he’s still in love with me.”

Tai let out a sigh and allowed his feelings of hatred towards the boy to ebb away. If TK genuinely loved Kari that much he could understand why the boy had reacted so violently to the breakup. It did not excuse him, but for the first time, he felt a slight pang of pity for him. “So what happened?” he asked.

“I waited with him at the hospital until the doctor sent him for an X-ray. I asked him if he wanted to come with us this evening, but he said no.” She paused for a moment, before adding in a sombre voice, “I’m not sure if I can salvage that friendship.”

“You miss him as a friend, don’t you?” Tai asked, although her voice had already told him the answer.

“Yeah, I do…”

They returned to Mario Kart and it seemed that the conversation had weighed enough of Kari that her game had dropped enough to level the playing field. Tai won the next two races with only the quiet noise of the game to be heard in the apartment. Pausing to take a drink of his soda, he decided that it was now or never. He had to broach **the **subject.

“Kari…” he began keeping his voice low so that it did not travel beyond where they sat, “what would you have done if I had told you that I was in love with you too?”

His sister stiffened slightly and turned to face him, a look of confusion forming on her face. It seemed he had caught her off guard with the question. After a few moments of silence, in which he saw her chest rise as she took a breath, Kari said, “I would probably have thought you were making fun of me.”

Tai felt slightly hurt by her comment but understood the sentiment behind it. She had been so scared of how he might react that the idea of him mocking her would probably have made more sense than him returning her feelings. “Kari, I would never to that,” he replied reassuringly.

There was a pause before she spoke, “I know, but it would have been difficult for me to accept something I’d thought impossible for over two years.”

“So what about if I had assured you that I was serious?”

He watched as she thought for a moment. It must be difficult for her to contemplate such an emotional hypothetical, he reasoned. Eventually, she said, “I would probably have cried, embraced you and then kissed you.”

The thought of holding Kari in his arms and kissing those soft, sweet lips was almost too much for Tai to bear. All he needed to do was reach out and he could have it. He took a deep breath to try and steady himself. He needed to know more about what his sister desired before he could decide what course of action to take. “Would you have wanted us to have a relationship… more than we already do?”

Kari looked slightly taken aback by the question and after a few moments gave him a suspicious look, “why are you asking me this?”

He had been prepared for this question and could only hope that his answer would prove to be enough to convince her to tell him what he needed to know. “We haven’t really spoken about this since mom and dad were away. And even then it was brief.” He paused to make sure he selected his next words carefully. “I guess it’s been on my mind since then and I was curious to know if you had given any thought to it. I suppose what I’m asking is, did you have any good thoughts about your feelings or did you simply start hating yourself?”

Kari closed her eyes and for a moment Tai was worried that she would burst into tears. He watched her take another deep breath before replying, “yes.”

For the second time that night he reached out and took hold of her hands. “If it’s too painful, you don’t have to talk,” he said soothingly, deciding that his answer was not worth seeing her in pain.

She opened her eyes and he could see a thin layer of water covering them. “It wasn’t all dark thoughts I had. On the days when I didn’t feel so down, I would imagine us together. Holding hands as we walked side by side, cuddled together on a sofa, going out on dates together… us kissing.” She lowered her head and looked away. “I would have wanted us to be together despite how difficult it might be.”

And there it was, the answer that he’d sought since walking home from Teiko’s. Kari would want them to be together. All of a sudden Tai was gripped with indecision and could feel fear begin to build up inside him. Here he sat, in front of his little sister, facing the biggest decision of his life. This was difficult... so very difficult. On the one hand, he had the potential to make Kari happier than she had ever been… no, not just her, him too. For he could no longer deny how desperately he wanted to be with her. To feel all of the love that she had to give and return it in kind. Except on the other, he could end up leading them down a road fraught with adversity, pain and suffering. Was he willing to risk putting Kari through that? 

Tai looked his sister up and down. Here she sat, with her hair like a lit match, wearing clothes that expressed her personality and having just told him she had started to patch things up with her friends. Irrespective of the fact that she believed he would never return her feelings, Kari was happy. Happier than she had been in over two years. Was it really worth risking all she had recently gained? Maybe the old saying was true. Maybe ignorance could be bliss. If his sister never found out the truth, she might stay happy. Whereas if he enlightened her, there was a strong possibility that things would end badly and she would get seriously hurt as a result. And he would never be able to live with himself if he hurt her. He could not tell her.

“I think I’ll go to bed,” Kari then said as she sat her pad down on the coffee table.

“Are you going to be ok?” Tai asked, worried that his questions had caused her some distress.

She gave him a weak smile. “I’ll be fine. You don’t have to worry about me slipping back into depression just because you wanted to talk to me. Kari then stood up and picked up her music player and headphones. “Goodnight, Tai.”

“Goodnight, Kari,” he responded, hoping that she had not just lied to him.

Switching off the TV and GameCube, Tai unhooked the games console and took it back to his room. Undressing, he pulled on his pyjamas and climbed into bed. His mind still firmly occupied with thoughts about his sister. In a cruel twist of fate, it seemed that he was the one who now had a secret to keep.


	20. Pt2 11) In the flesh

**Part Two: His Secret**

**Chapter Eleven: In the flesh **

It was late on Sunday night and Tai Kamiya sat alone in his bedroom. The main light was off, with the only illumination coming from the lamp on his desk. He’d been sitting working on the same report for hours and had not even realised that the light level had dropped so much. His concentration level had been low all evening, however, the paper was due tomorrow so he had no choice but to finish it. Otherwise, he would have sodded it hours ago and picked it up again tomorrow night. The problem had, of course, been Kari.

Ever since the final acceptance last night that he was in love with her, he could not stop thinking about her. Like a worm eating into his brain, thoughts pertaining to his sister had penetrated all levels of his conscious mind and even into his subconscious. For he had awoken that morning after having had a wet dream about her. In the waking world, his every second thought was about her. While working on this report, he would think of a point and start writing it down, only for his mind to wander to Kari before he had even finished. And this was after having lain in bed last night trying to decide if he had made the right decision in not telling her how he felt. Hell, he’d even sat for over an hour earlier in the day re-evaluating all the options to see if he could find a better one. In the end, he had come to the same conclusion as he had last night. If Kari was happy, she would be better off not knowing the truth.

Tai picked up a glass of orange juice from his desk and drained the last of its contents. All the while thinking about the decision he had been forced to make yesterday. While it may have been in Kari’s best interests, it left him with one hell of a problem. For he had fallen in love with her but had to keep himself from having her. He sat the glass down with a thud. It wasn’t fair! This could perhaps be the worst scenario that someone could find themselves in. He had fallen in love with someone that loved him back, but couldn’t act on his feelings. And not because they were already in a relationship or had prior history, but through a simple bad draw in the family department. Even Kari, who had suffered for two years under the weight of her feelings, had probably been better off.

The image of Kari, huddled on her bedroom floor, with tears staining her cheeks floated into his mind. How many nights had she spent in that same position before he had finally found out her secret and liberated her? Was that to be his fate in two years’ time, less even? Would he slowly start to isolate himself from everyone he knew, his sister especially, as he sunk deeper into a black pit of depression? No, he was stronger than that. He would find some way to keep his mind away from Kari and how he felt about her. He let out a mirthless laugh. She had thought the exact same thing in the beginning. Going as far as dating TK for an entire year, followed by Davis, to try and keep her feelings at bay. Both to no avail. He did not have the luxury of trying that. For he had already burnt through multiple girlfriends, without being able to find one that lasted more than a couple of weeks. While he had not known why at the time, it was perfectly clear why it had not worked out now. Last night’s kiss with Teiko had highlighted perfectly that there was a singular problem with all of them, they were not Kari.

Tai felt a surge of anger and hammered his fist atop the desk surface. How could he have let this happen? How could he have fallen in love with the one person he could not be with? Why was this happening to him? A voice, cold and slippery, whispered from deep within his mind, _“this is what you deserve, Tai Kamiya”_

Without thinking, he glanced around the room, as though expecting to see some physical manifestation of his own thoughts. _“I don’t deserve this,”_ he fired back as another flash of anger sparked inside him. _“Why would I possibly deserve this.”_

There was silence inside his head for a moment as Tai picked up his pen and looked back at his report. He read the last line he had written and pondered what to put next. Only for the answer that materialised to be, _“how about the fact you let Kari suffer for two years without doing anything.”_

His pen froze in mid-air. _“I didn’t know something was wrong.”_

_“Didn’t know… more like didn’t notice. You were so caught up in your own little world that you were completely oblivious to almost everything that was happening to her. And even when you did spot something, you cheerfully ignored it because you had more important things to do.”_

“That’s not fair!” Tai exclaimed out loud.

_“It’s perfectly fair. You ignored your sister for two years and only started to figure out something was wrong because of something she did. Some older brother you are.”_

The words hit Tai like a blow to the gut. No matter how he tried to rationalise or justify it, he **had** only begun to suspect something was wrong with Kari because of something she did. For want of a simple text message, he would have continued drawing up his weekend bucket list and never even realised that he needed to patch up their dwindling relationship. The voice had been right, it was perfectly fair. Only it did not stop there.

_“So you let your sister suffer for two years. Eventually, find out that the reason behind it all is because she is in love with you_. _Tell her that you do not feel the same way. Only to then change your mind but not tell her. And you think it is unfair on you? You’re pathetic, Tai Kamiya.”_

Tai sat wide-eyed as he listened to his own mind expertly dismantle his own argument and stab him with each and every shard. As his metaphorical blood began to pour, he felt a single tear form in his right eye. _“I’m doing this to protect her,” _he cried internally as it rolled down his cheek.

_“Really? Are you sure you’re not doing it to protect yourself? You’re not even giving Kari any say in the matter. Instead, you're treating her like the innocent little child of light and choosing for her because you think you know best.”_

“Stop it,” Tai whispered, “this is for the best.”

_“Best for you maybe. You’re weak, Tai Kamiya. Pathetic and weak!”_

“Stop it!” In a fit of rage, he seized the empty glass from his desk and threw it against the wall. It shattered on impact, spreading glass all over the floor, some of which slid under his wardrobe.

Tai’s breaths came in laboured pants as his body visibly shook. A sheen of icy sweat had formed on his forehead and he felt cold to his core. Turning his head he looked down at the pile of fragmented glass that covered his floor beneath the impact point. Everyone else in the house must already be asleep he reasoned for no footsteps could be heard on the other side of his door. In an unsteady manner, he got to his feet and crossed over to where the glass fragments lay. Bending down, he righted the jagged base and carefully began dropping each of the other shards into it. Only he soon realised that there were not enough of them to comprise the entire glass. He glanced around but after it quickly became apparent that they were nowhere in sight, he figured they must have ended up under the wardrobe.

In the scant light that reached the base of the wardrobe from the desk lamp, Tai flattened himself onto his stomach and slid his hand beneath it. He found the first shard with ease and withdrew it, placing it with the others. It was still not enough to complete the glass. Going back in for a second hunt he found shard two lurking towards the back; the little sucker had travelled far. Unfortunately, he had failed to find number three.

“ARGH!” Tai yelled as he accidentally dragged his left forearm over the third shard.

Relinquishing his grip on the other, he pulled his arm out from under the wardrobe. Even in the dull light, he could see the three-inch line of dripping red that marked the slice in the flesh of his forearm. Picking himself up off the floor, he held it out with the cut facing up in order to limit the amount that dribbled onto the floor. For a brief moment, he just stared at it in shock. However, that quickly subsided and he began to feel the stinging pain. Crossing to the door, he made his way out into the hallway and straight to the bathroom. Flicking on the light switch he instantly saw the narrow, three-inch pool of blood that ran along his forearm and the multiple streaks that snaked down both sides. Wasting no time he grabbed the roll of toilet paper, tore off a wad and started to soak up the sticky crimson liquid. It took three in total to wipe his arm clean, however, the wound continued to bleed. Clumsily, he wrapped enough paper around it to try and stem the blood flow until he could find the first aid kit.

It took several minutes of rooting around in the cupboard under the sink before he found it. His mom seriously had too many beauty products. Removing the toilet paper from the wound, he ran his forearm under the tap in order to clean it. From inside the first aid kit, he withdrew a bottle of antiseptic and some cotton wool. This was going to hurt like a bitch, he thought as he soaked the first piece in the liquid. That turned out to be an understatement. Suppressing a howl he pressed the sodden ball against the still bleeding slice. It felt like his arm was on fire as the antiseptic seeped into his flesh. Unfortunately, he had little choice but to clean the wound thoroughly, lest he want to end up with it becoming infected. When he had eventually finished, he covered it with a thick wad of gauze and then wrapped a bandage around it. With any luck, the blood wound not seep through; a sure indication he would require stitches.

After cleaning up the bathroom and washing the blood off of his bedroom floor, he disposed of the broken glass; forgetting about the two shards still underneath his wardrobe. Seated at his desk once more, he considered the paper he still had to finish for the next day. His arm hurt like hell, however, the constant pain did an excellent job of keeping thoughts about Kari at bay, but allowing him enough focus to concentrate on the report. Over the next hour, he managed to get more work done than he’d managed in the previous four. He eventually finished at one in the morning. Feeling exhausted as well as physically and emotionally drained, he went to bed. Where he enjoyed a dreamless night’s sleep.


	21. Pt2 12) Things left unsaid

**Part Two: His Secret**

**Chapter Twelve: Things left unsaid**

The weekend had gone in far too quick for Kari’s liking. Largely due to the fact that she had only started enjoying them again two weeks ago. Prior to that, they had been long, arduous periods of time, that she had spent alone with her own thoughts periodically attacking her. At least during the week, she’d had school to distract her. Perhaps the only silver lining to it had been that she’d inevitably spent more time on her homework or studying, resulting in her grades improving from a mix of B+ and A-, to straight A’s across the board come her end of year report card. Her parents had been so proud that they’d bought her a present of her choosing; she’d picked a proper set of headphones. Regardless, she found herself out of her h.NAOTO clothing and back into her green sailor suit school uniform far sooner than she would have liked.

It had been a good one, Kari mused as her eyes drifted away from her textbook and up to the clock that hung on the classroom wall. It would be lunchtime in a matter of minutes. After thoroughly trouncing Davis at Mario Kart, much to his shock and everyone else’s amusement, she had walked home while listening to Wish You Were Here. The album had been receiving regular plays and was quickly becoming one of her favourites. Leading her to wonder what other wonders Pink Floyd had in their extensive back catalogue. When she’d finally arrived home, she’d found Tai waiting up for her on the sofa. They’d talked about their respective evenings while playing Mario Kart and she’d told him about talking to TK. He had then surprised her with questions regarding a hypothetical situation in which he felt the same way about her as she did about him. It had seemed a bit odd, but she had satisfied his curiosity. Reasoning that talking about it would help prevent any possible slip back into the dark pit of despair she had only just escaped. It had been late by the time they’d eventually said goodnight and gone to bed. After sleeping in on Sunday morning, Kari had received a call from Yolei, asking if she wanted to come over so they could finish homework together. She’d leapt at the chance to spend more time with her best friend. And was surprised to find that the pair were now on a much more even footing when it came to school work.

The chime to signal the start of lunch sounded and at the teacher's behest, the students of Kari’s class rose as one and began packing away their things. Unlike Yolei, the other girls that had once comprised her circle of friends had been less forgiving when the lavender haired girl had asked her to sit with them at lunch the day after they had made up. To say it had been awkward would be like saying Piedmon had been slightly troublesome to take down. The group were still very much into the latest trends and so she’d found herself with little to offer by way of conversation that would not sound argumentative. She’d spoken to Yolei afterwards and they had agreed that they would spend time together away from the group. Resulting in her returning to eating lunch by herself with her headphones on.

Withdrawing the sturdy black plastic cans from her bag, Kari pulled them over her ears and found Tubular Bell’s II on her music player. Hitting play, she pocketed the device, picked up her bag and left the classroom; she was the last one out. Lost in the opening passage of the music, she made her way to the lunchroom and headed for an empty table towards the rear of the room. About halfway there she stopped dead when a hand caught her wrist. Her head spun around to face the assailant only to be confronted by the smiling face of Davis.

She slipped her headphones off in time to hear him say, “We saved you a seat.”

A look of confusion spread across Kari’s face as her eyes wandered from Davis to the other occupants of the table. It was Cody and Yolei. “I don’t understand,” she said, eyes darting between the three smiling faces.

“We all had such a good time on Saturday that we decided to sit together at lunch today. Just like old times,” Yolei said indicating the empty chair beside her. “You are going to sit with us?”

Kari responded by backpedalling and sitting down in the offered seat. “When did you guys decide this?” she asked, still feeling a little confused.

“Last night,” Cody answered.

“We thought we’d surprise you,” Davis added.

She looked between the two boys before asking, “but why? You all have your own friends to hang with.”

“We know,” Yolei said with a smile. “But Saturday reminded us that we’re also friends with each other. And it’s all thanks to you, Kari.”

“Yeah, Kari. You really are the jelly that keeps the bread of our peanut butter sandwich together.”

She along with both Cody and Yolei gave Davis a look that said, ‘that makes no sense whatsoever’.

“What,” the boy said indignantly as his eyes moved from one face to the next. “The jelly is what keeps a peanut butter sandwich together. Just like Kari is the one who keeps our group together.”

They collectively shook their heads at him.

“I think what Davis is trying, but failing miserably to say is, that without you we all stopped spending time together and drifted apart. You’re the one who keeps us together, Kari, and it’s good to have you back.”

“That’s exactly what I said!” Davis said indignantly, causing all three of them to laugh.

Packing away her headphones and taking out her bento box, Kari found her eyes drifting to the table opposite theirs. Amongst the chattering huddled heads of the schools creative writing group, she caught sight of the blonde hair of TK. Whether it was coincidence or fate, the boy looked up in time to catch her staring. They made eye contact for a brief moment before she watched him survey her companions. She gave him a gentle smile and a small wave, but this only caused him to lower his head back into the huddle.

“…So we were thinking of making this a weekly thing…”

“Hmmm?” Kari said, upon realising that someone had just said something.

“I said that we’re thinking of doing this once a week,” Yolei said, sounding slightly irritated at having to repeat herself.

“Sorry,” Kari replied quickly, “I must have zoned out for a sec.”

“So what do you think?” Cody asked as all eyes looked to her.

“I think it’s a great idea,” she replied without hesitation. Then she sighed, “but it’s not the same without TK.”

Davis gave her a look that suggested he disagreed with that viewpoint, however, it was Yolei who said, “if you’d like, I can try talking to him. Maybe give him an open invitation to join us if he ever feels like it.”

Kari thought about this for a moment and decided that, while it was a good idea in principle, one aspect of it needed to change. “I’ll tell him about it myself,” she replied firmly. “He at least talked to me last week and I don’t want him to think that I’m sending other people to try and talk him around. If the two of us are to ever get on again, I need to be the one talking to him.”

“If you’re sure,” Yolei then said, giving her a look that suggested she questioned her sanity.

“I’m sure.”

They laughed and joked while they ate lunch, however, Kari could not help but think about TK. Last weeks heated conversation, followed by the subsequent trip to the hospital had left her unsure if relations between them had improved, deteriorated further or remained the same. She had given him space for the rest of the week, even though she’d wanted to ask him if his wrist was ok. Granted she had needed it too. For what she had learned from the interaction was that, despite what she had thought, she had not made peace with the whole affair. In that respect, it was here, having lunch with the other DigiDestined, that she made the decision to try again.

##

In a replay of the previous Monday, come the end of the official school day, Kari sat working on some homework until about ten minutes before the creative writing club were due to finish their weekly meeting. Packing away her things, she left the classroom and made her way through the corridors. The whole affair gave her an unsurprising feeling of déjà vu as she waited in the exact same spot as last week. Soon the bodies started leaving the room, but after a minute or two, there was no sign of TK. Perhaps he had stayed behind to finish something, she pondered. Only one way to find out. Walking to the door, Kari poked her head inside the room. Towards the back, she found the blonde haired boy unsuccessfully trying to stuff his laptop into its case one-handed.

“Stupid…” he cursed, not noticing her approach.

Kari reached out a hand and held the case open for him, “here let me help.”

TK looked up at her. “I don’t need your help, Kamiya,” he said as he angrily shoved the laptop inside. “Or your pity.”

Kari chose not to let the harsh nature of his words rile her. If she could stay calm and polite, hopefully, it would help him to cool down too. “How’s your wrist?” she asked.

TK clumsily shouldered his laptop case and picked up his school bag. “It doesn’t hurt if that’s what you’re asking.”

“How long will it take to heal?”

“A couple of weeks,” the boy replied as he headed for the door.

Kari walked beside him. While his tone might have been short, he was at least talking to her in a more civilised manner. A vast improvement over how last week’s conversation had started. “So what have you been writing recently?” she probed, more interested in how he would react to the question than getting a detailed answer.

“The club’s been working on writing styles recently. We collectively came up with a set of characters and are each writing a short story about them while adhering to a set of rules we came up with. The idea is to see if we can tell who wrote which story once we’re all finished.”

A small smile formed on Kari’s lips. She had hoped that asking about his writing would get him talking and it seemed to have done just that. TK had always been so passionate about it and loved to discuss it; especially with her. “That sounds interesting,” she replied, however, before she could say anything else, he continued of his own volition.

“It is, but I’ve been spending way more time working on my own project.”

“Tell me about it,” Kari replied quickly as they left the classroom.

Without hesitating, TK continued, “I’ve been making a lot of notes on our adventures in the Digital world. I’m planning on…” he stopped abruptly and turned to look at her. The expression on his face clearly told her that he’d only just realised how openly he’d been talking. “Why am I even telling you this?” he asked, although it sounded every bit a question for himself as it was for her. He then looked her straight in the eyes, his face expressionless. Kari met his gaze and though his blue orbs looked icy, she could see that it was starting to melt. “What do you want from me, Kamiya.”

“Something that you want too, only you’re too afraid to let go of your anger,” she replied, her voice strong and unwavering.

“What would you know about my anger?” TK spat back.

Kari held her ground and did not relinquish his gaze. “I know that you’re scared to let it go. Scared that if you do and you get too close to me, you’ll end up getting hurt again.” She felt the urge to take hold of his hand but resisted it. For doing so would most likely bring about a backlash. Instead, she tried to convey the same warmth and kindness with her eyes.

TK broke off the stare and turned away from her. They walked in silence for a full thirty seconds before he finally said, “what do you want me to do, Kari? Forget that you ripped my heart out, skewered it on a spit and then roasted it over an open flame?”

“I know you can’t forget, TK, and I would never ask you to try,” Kari said softly, allowing any anger she may have felt to slip away. “However, we both lost something that predated our romantic relationship.”

“And what is that?”

This time she did take hold of his hand and turned him around to face her. Looking him directly in the eyes, she said softly, “our friendship. I’ve missed it, TK, and so have you.”

The boy’s blue eyes remained icy as he spoke, “you know until you spoke to me last week, I was content to hate you and never talk to you again. In fact, hating you was the only thing that stopped me trying to futilely win you back.” He pulled his hand out of her grip. “So why did you have to stir the pot, Kari? Why did you have to remind me that I lost more than just my girlfriend that night?”

“Because hating each other is the easy thing to do… but it’s not the right thing,” Kari said, finally knowing the correct answer. “It will be hard at first, but I truly believe that we can be friends again. Only we both have to be willing to give it a shot for it to work.” She held out her hand. “Do you want to give it a try.”

She watched as his eyes glanced down at her offered hand. For a moment she saw his own tremble by his side, however, it didn’t move. “I’m sorry, Kari, I just can’t.”

Kari allowed her hand to fall slowly back to her side. She had been afraid that this might be too much for him. That being around her would cause him too much pain. “I understand,” she said softly, lowering her head. When he turned to walk away she called after him, “the others miss you too. We hung out on Saturday and again at lunch today, but it wasn’t the same without you. We’re planning on having lunch together once a week. If you ever want to join us, you’re more than welcome. And you’ll always be invited if we decide to get together out with school.”

She watched as TK took a few more steps and then, surprisingly, stopped. “I miss all of you too, including that ass, Davis.” There was a moment's silence before he added, “but don’t hold your breath waiting on me joining you guys.” He then let out a genuine laugh that made her smile. “See you next Monday, Kari.”

The smile lingered on her lips as she watched him turn a corner and disappear from view. Turning, she headed in the opposite direction to an exit that led out to the bike racks. Unlike last week, she now knew one thing for certain, while time had the ability to heal it could not do the job alone. You needed to put in a lot of hard work and effort. And it seemed like Monday evenings were the perfect time to do both.


	22. Pt2 13) Ebb and flow

**Part Two: His Secret**

**Chapter Thirteen: Ebb and flow**

On Monday morning Tai had awoken to the throbbing pain in his left arm. Fortunately, the blood had not soaked through the gauze and after unwrapping it, he had found that it would not need stitches. It had still needed to be covered and hurt like hell for the rest of the day. Come Tuesday, the pain had subsided slightly overnight and continued to drop over the course of the day. By the time he had arrived home, it was barely noticeable. It was only once shut away in his room that evening while doing his homework, did he have his first thoughts about Kari since before breaking the glass on Sunday. It had concerned how nice her hair had looked at dinner. However, once that singular thought had entered his mind, the floodgates had opened and he found himself back in the exact same position as on Sunday. He’d managed very little work that night.

Tai groaned as he finished transferring books from his locker into his school bag. His inability to concentrate for two of the last three nights had left him in serious trouble in terms of his homework. He had two more reports due by the end of the week, neither of which he had started, a bucket load of mathematics problems to solve by tomorrow and some questions to finish for human biology too. Unfortunately, Kari had haunted him all day at school too. And even as he stood here in front of his locker, he found his mind wavering from his daunting task to ponder what she would look like in a bikini; sublime he’d wager.

Shouldering the heavy rucksack, he made his way out of the building and to the bike racks. Unlocking his red-framed bicycle, he wrenched it out and hopped on. Even at full pelt it still took him fifteen minutes to get home. With his brain almost getting him killed when it failed to notice an oncoming car until the last moment because it had been too distracted by images of his sister in a skimpy two-piece. Stowing his bike in the undercroft, he raced up the stairs two at a time and ran the short distance to the apartments front door. Inside, he changed his shoes quickly and managed to get to his bedroom door before Kari could come and great him with her obligatory hug. He was about to step across the threshold when a voice called out to him.

“Tai?” He breathed a sigh of relief when he realised it was his mom. “What’s with the rush? Dinner won’t be for another half an hour.”

He turned his head and with one eye on Kari’s door said, “I’ve got a mountain of work I need to get done tonight.” He paused as a thought occurred to him, “do you mind if I eat in my room? I really need to get started and don’t have any time to waste.”

Just over a week ago, he would undoubtedly have gotten a sharp, ‘no!’ However, his mom had calmed down enough since then to afford him some leeway with meal times. “Sure, I’ll bring it through to you when it’s done,” she replied.

“Thanks, Mom,” he said, and on realising that his sister had not yet made an appearance, asked, “where’s Kari?”

“She went over to Yolei’s house after school to work on a report they got handed out today. She probably won’t be back until later.” Well, that answered that question, Tai thought. He was about to step inside his room when his mother then said, “why? You weren’t planning to take her to get a tattoo next, were you?”

In the days before hair-gate, he would have taken this to be a joke on his mother’s part. However, that had changed now. While she had settled down somewhat over the past week and a half, it felt like what trust she’d had in him in regards to Kari had been irrevocably broken. Yet if he had his time back to do it all over again, he knew he would do the exact same thing. His sister had paid the price for him to have a moment of fun when she was five, now he would continually pay it for her. And he would never begrudge her it no matter what the cost.

“No, Mom, I’m not planning on taking Kari to get a tattoo,” he replied.

His mother frowned at him before turning away. Entering his room, Tai closed the door behind him. The idea of his sister's perfect skin being permanently blemished seemed abhorrent somehow. Sitting his bag down beside his desk, he quickly undressed and pulled on the first pair of jeans and long-sleeved upper body wear that came to hand; he didn’t want anyone to notice the three-inch scab that ran along his inner forearm. Dropping into his chair, he pulled out his mathematics textbook and a notepad. Since this was due tomorrow it took precedence over everything else. No sooner had he opened the book to the relevant page and started reading the first problem, did his mind start to wander. How nice would it feel to rub his hands over his sister’s soft skin? He gripped his pencil tighter as he re-read the question. The wood dug into his index finger when he started to copy down the important information from the textbook. The memory of his fingertips touching the bare skin at the base of her spine last Saturday night flashed inside his head and caused him to exert too much pressure on the page; the pencil tip broke.

For the next half-hour, his mind was bombarded with thoughts of a similar nature. So much so, that he almost cried when his mom knocked at the door with his dinner. He’d only managed a single problem in that time. He ate quickly, after which he decided that some form of distraction in order to counter **the** distraction was in order. So he found his mp3 player, popped his earbuds in, hit shuffle and turned the volume up to the max. For the next fifteen minutes, the thumping of drums and slamming of guitars did an effective job at keeping his thoughts at bay, allowing him to make a little headway with his work. A new track started as he moved onto a fresh problem. These really were quite samey, he mused, finding the parallel between the songs and the questions amusing. Perhaps listening to some of Kari’s music had altered his perspective enough that he no longer found such short, simplistic tracks appealing. Maybe he could go borrow some of her CD’s. She probably wouldn’t mind, his sister was good like that. In fact, she would probably give him anything he wanted if he asked for it…

A full five minutes passed before Tai became aware that he had stopped writing in the middle of an equation. In disgust, he threw the pencil away and dropped his head down onto the desk surface. The pencil hit the ground and rolled under the wardrobe. This was impossible! No matter what he tried, thoughts of his pretty, beautiful, gorgeous… sexy sister managed to worm their way into his mind. He was yearning… lusting over something that he could not allow himself to have and it was driving him insane. He let out a series of laboured breaths. How had Kari managed to survive for two years? A thought crossed his mind, why didn’t he just tell her? Maybe they could share a few forbidden moments when they were alone, but act like normal siblings the rest of the time. Surely if he did that, it would be enough to sate his desires and allow him to function normally.

Tai reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone. He had to put an end to this. Scrolling through his contacts he found Kari’s name and opened a new message. He would ask her to come home asap as he had an emergency that he needed her help to sort out. Knowing his sister, it should be enough to get her to come. When she arrived, he would shepherd her into his room, sit her down and tell her that he was in love with her too. _“Kari, I’ve got a serious problem and I really need you to come home and help me. Tell you more when you get here,” _he wrote. His finger hovered over the send button. Was this the right thing to do? Would the two of them be able to restrict themselves to a few ‘forbidden moments’?... No… the risk was too great. Kari was happy for the first time in over two years and the fallout from revealing his secret could be devastating for her. Either she would have to live as he did currently, knowing that he loved her but she could not be with him, or they would start a relationship that would place them in the middle of a metaphorical minefield. Irrespective of the choice, the likelihood that she would be seriously hurt was too high. He deleted the message and pocketed his phone. This was his burden to bear and he would somehow have to find the strength and courage to carry it.

Turning his head, Tai’s eyes scanned the floor for his wayward pencil but found no trace of it. Slowly he rose from his chair and walked in the direction of the wardrobe. With no sign of it elsewhere on the floor, he reasoned that it must have rolled underneath it. Dropping down to his stomach he carefully slid a hand under. However, instead of his pencil, the first thing his finger found was a shard of glass. Pulling it out, Tai gazed at the drops of red that covered its razor-sharp edge. With his other hand, he rolled up the left sleeve of his top and stared at the three-inch scab that covered the laceration. He could recall vividly the sharp pain he’d experienced when the glass tore through his skin. The burning of the antiseptic as it cleaned the wound. And the constant throb he’d had to endure for an entire day before it had started to ebb… the throbbing pain that had prevented his mind from wandering and allowed him to focus on the here and now.

Tai’s eyes shifted back to the shard of glass; it glistened in the light. Was he seriously contemplating this? Was the situation so dire that the only solution to his problem would be to inflict enough pain upon himself that his mind would be unable to wander from it? He looked between the bloodied edge of the glass and his arm. This was a bad idea, but what other choice did he have. He could not tell Kari, however, he needed to get that school work done. All he needed was to be able to focus for the next thirty hours so he could catch up. He would then have the weekend to figure out some alternative way to distract his mind.

Rolling up his other sleeve, Tai held the piece of glass close to his wrist. He felt a cold sweat on the nape of his neck and his body started to shake as he tentatively pressed the tip against his flesh. The edge of the glass felt like a cold razor blade against his skin. No, he thought in desperation. This was stupid… he should not… could not do th… Tai let out a muffled cry and a single tear rolled down his cheek as he applied enough pressure to pierce the skin. The first stab of pain caused him to wince, but he knew it would not nearly be enough. Pushing slightly deeper caused a sliver of crimson to run down his wrist. His eyes screwed up as he agonisingly tore the shard through about an inch and a half of skin and surface tissue. Blood slowly began to pool as the stabbing sensation engulfed his mind.

The shard of glass slipped from Tai’s hand and landed on the wooden floor with a light tinkle. His eyes were transfixed on the steadily growing flow of blood as it started to run down his arm and drip onto the floor. What had he done? It took a few minutes for him to recover from the shock of having just deliberately cut himself. First and foremost, he needed to clean and dress this wound. Shakily getting to his feet, he grabbed a sweat towel from the top of his dirty laundry hamper and wrapped it around his right wrist. No sense in allowing the blood to drip all over the apartment floor. Treading lightly he left his room and headed to the bathroom; ensuring that no one saw him. Once safely inside he found the first aid kit, soaked the first cotton bud in antiseptic and rinsed his wrist under the tap. Pressing hard, he almost screamed at the intensity of the burning sensation as the antiseptic seeped into the laceration. He continued to clean the wound until he had become fully accustomed to the feeling, eking out every last second of pain until it ebbed away. Applying a wad of gauze, he then wrapped a bandage around it.

Disposing of all the evidence down the toilet, he returned to his room and cleaned the blood off of the floor with the sweat towel and hid it underneath his wardrobe. His eyes then fell on the shard of glass. Picking it up he turned it over in his hand. More blood now stained its edge. Crossing over to his desk he looked down at the small bin that sat beside it. His hand hovered over it and began to shake as he thought about dropping the shard inside. It was such a simple act so why did he find it so difficult?

Tai sat down at his desk and opened his drawer to find a new pencil. When he closed it again, a new occupant now sat tucked away at the back beneath an old foam stress ball. His arm had already begun to throb as he re-read the question he had been in the middle of before throwing his previous writing implement away. He had little trouble concentrating for the rest of the evening.


	23. Pt2 14) See-Saw

**Part Two: His Secret**

**Chapter Fourteen: See-saw**

It was Sunday afternoon and Kari Kamiya found herself alone in the apartment with her brother. She’d spent the morning in her room working on a school assignment, but come mid-day both hunger and a sense of boredom had drawn her out of her bedroom. The former was to be expected, for it had been several hours since breakfast. Whereas the latter had been somewhat of a surprise. For a whole year, she had spent so much time alone that solitary study had become the norm. However, it seemed that suddenly having people back in her life had made it less attractive without her even realising.

In that regard, when she left her bedroom to find Tai lounging on the sofa, she felt the need to break for lunch and go spend some time with him. Since her late-night conversation with him a week past Saturday, she had barely seen her brother out with meal times. Granted between the amount of homework he had and the fact she had been out two nights during the week and the bulk of yesterday, it should not have come as a surprise. Still, she could not deny that she had missed seeing him and this seemed like the perfect opportunity to rectify that. However, first things first, lunch.

Kari made her way into the kitchen and began rooting around in the fridge for any raw materials that had not wound up in one of her mom’s abominations. She sighed upon finding there was little beyond what could be placed between two slices of bread. Cobbling together some cooked ham, cheese, potato salad and lettuce, she closed the fridge and placed the items on the work surface. Fetching some bread she looked over towards the sitting area.

“Do you want a sandwich, Tai?” she called over to her brother.

There was no acknowledgement from the sofa that he had even heard her.

“Hey, Tai, do you want a sandwich?” she tried again.

No reply.

Kari rolled her eyes. Slouched on the couch like that, her brother could probably be classified as asleep. There was only one thing for it. “TAI KAMIYA, WAKE UP THIS INSTANT!” she yelled, mimicking their mother.

She watched as her brother theatrically leapt from the sofa while at the same time trying to turn around. The result, he landed on the floor with a thud. After a few seconds, she saw a tuft of his chocolate hair appear above the sofa.

“Do you want a sandwich, Tai, “ she asked again sweetly.

Her brother stood up and glanced around, possibly searching for their mother, before honing his gaze in on her, realisation appearing to have dawned. “That was not funny, Kari,” he said, sounding more than a bit annoyed.

“Geez, talking with your stomach there, Bro?” she asked. Even from the kitchen, she could hear the sound of Tai’s stomach rumble. She laughed, he could be so irritable and grouchy when hungry. “That’ll be a big yes then. Why don’t you sit back down and I’ll make you a sandwich.”

He grumbled but did as she suggested and reclaimed his spot on the sofa. Five minutes later Kari crossed the apartment and sat two plates and two tins of soda down on the coffee table. A smile spread across her lips when she saw her brother's eyes bulge at the two-tier sandwich and stack of chips now in front of him.

“Not bad, considering what I had to work with,” Kari said as she sat down beside him; failing to notice that he shifted away from her slightly.

“Thanks,” he replied, sounding as though he was not quite all there.

“Are you ok?” she asked with a slight tilt of her head.

“I’m fine,” Tai said, reaching out to pick up his sandwich. “You know me, I don’t function properly when I’m hungry.”

Kari did know him. And while what he said was true, something still seemed off about him. Perhaps his current school workload had taken its toll. If so, she knew just how to remedy that issue. “So, how about a bit of Killer Instinct after we eat?” she said, taking a bite out of her own sandwich; yum.

“I should probably get back to work. I’ve still got a lot I need to do for tomorrow,” he eventually replied.

His tone reminded her a lot of the one she herself had used that Friday night when he’d suggested pizza and a movie. That mix of regret and longing she knew all too well. At least in his case, the feeling would not be a continual thing. Unlike how it had been for her. Still, she was not going to let him out of a butt whooping that easily. “You know the rule about too much studying, Bro.”

The corners of his mouth twitched slightly as he let out a small laugh, “I’ll end up like Joe.”

“Yep. So you’re going to have some R&R after lunch before you go back to the books. Non-debatable.”

Her brother sighed and took a drink of his soda. “Fine, go get the N64 and let’s get this over with.”

While it was not quite the reaction she had expected, Kari stood up and went to her room to fetch the games console.

##

Tai let out a silent exhale as he watched his sister get up from the sofa and head to her bedroom. He had avoided Kari for much of the week and had hoped to get through the rest of today without having to socialise with her too. In hindsight, it had been a foolish idea to leave his bedroom, however, sitting at his desk all week had become depressing and he had needed the break. Unfortunately, it seemed his recess would only make the situation worse. Why had Kari needed to pick the exact same time as him to come out of her room?

He slipped his left hand underneath the long sleeve of his orange shirt and the black sweatband he’d taken to wearing. His fingers found the scabbed cut he’d made on Wednesday night and started to rub at it furiously. A slight echo of the pain surfaced in his mind and he felt the need to start picking at it. While he hated to admit it, the continual throb had seen him through that night and the following one. Enough to get both his reports done and anything else that needed finished for Friday morning. A gruelling soccer practice to end the school week had left him exhausted but had not been enough to stop Kari creeping back into his mind later that evening. Having anticipated this, he had arranged to meet Izzy yesterday and spend the day studying with him. It had worked fairly well, for the conversation had helped keep him focused. However, today his fortune had quickly run out before taking a nosedive off a cliff. He would be lucky to get anything done after having to spend an hour or so with Kari. While the thought had crossed his mind to refuse point blank, it would have been akin to putting a sign above his head that said, ‘something is bothering me’. And that would have caused her to probe. No, he would need to take the hit, lest he raise suspicion.

Tai watched as his sister returned, sat the N64 on the floor and hooked it up to the TV. He took a breath to steady himself before she sat back down beside him. Averting his gaze back to his plate, he finished his lunch without saying a word. When eventually nothing remained on his plate, he turned to look at his sister, only to find her bright eyes staring at him.

“You ok, Tai?” she asked.

Great, she hadn’t needed a sign to tell her something was bothering him. For the briefest of moments, he thought about sharing his secret. However, seeing the light in her eyes and the smile on her face quickly ended any notion of doing so. Kari had not been this happy in over two years and he could not do anything that might jeopardise that. “Just been having trouble with my schoolwork this week,” he replied lightly. Since it was not a lie she would hopefully not suspect it wasn’t the whole truth.

“You’re working really hard, I’m sure everything will be ok in the end.” His sister reached out and rubbed his upper arm. Internally he tensed at her touch but if it showed on the outside she took no notice. In an instant, the hand turned into a fist and she playfully punched him. “Now it’s time to get your butt kicked.”

He gave her a faint smile, “why have you secretly been practising since our last bout?”

Kari gave a shrill laugh of derision, “I don’t need to practice to beat you, Bro. Besides, I prefer to beat up human opponents and your mini doppelganger is probably still hurting from all of the turtle shells I put up his backside to even consider any challenge I might throw at his feet.”

“Bring it, Sister,” he said without even thinking.

As he picked up his control pad from the table a thought crossed his mind. Was this how Kari had felt a few weeks ago? Frightened to even be around him in case she let something slip, but finding herself helplessly drawn out of the hole in which she hid? For it was exactly how he felt sitting there on the sofa with her. He may have wanted nothing more than to run away and hide in his room, but like a moth to a flame, his sister managed to coax him out of his hole without doing anything other than just being herself. An involuntary smile crossed his lips. She was going down! And she did… before getting back up, dusting down Spinal’s old bones and kicking Jago into the stone age in both rounds two and three. Frist bout to Kari.

They played for about an hour, virtually winning alternate matches for the duration. When he eventually got his nose in front overall, Kari sat down her pad.

“I think it’s time I returned to my history assignment,” she said and stood up from the couch. “Guess you beat me this time.”

Tai sighed in disappointment. Not only had he been enjoying himself, but he dreaded what awaited him within the confines of his bedroom. What’s more, he had a strong suspicion that she’d thrown that last round so that she could end the match with him the victor. However, he really needed to make an attempt at his own school work.

“I suppose I’d better get back to the books too,” he replied, trying to mask his regret.

He placed his own pad on the table while Kari switched of the games console and TV. Standing up he went to head off towards his bedroom only for her to pull him into a hug. His chocolate eyes met her reddish-browns and his heart skipped a beat. They were so bright and beautiful that he just wanted to lose himself in them forever. While Teiko had helped to restrict any feelings he’d had about it being wrong to have fallen in love with his sister, there were still moments where he thought it so. However, gazing deep into those perfect eyes somehow made those particular thoughts melt away. No wonder TK had fallen for her so hard, how could anyone not?

Kari squeezed him tightly and whispered into his ear, “it’s only a rough patch, Tai. It’ll soon pass.”

When she let him go and walked past him to go to her room, Tai could only hope that she had been right.

##

It had been slightly more difficult than Kari had anticipated to let her brother go after hugging him. Not only had she been captivated by his wonderful eyes and stirring aroma, but something had felt off about him. Like he was lacking his normal strength or, dare she even say it, wounded in some way. His school work must really be getting to him. Regardless, she had felt compelled to hold on to him, to protect him from whatever may be causing him harm, like he had done for her on so many occasions. Instead, she had left him with some soothing words that she hoped he found helpful. Perhaps she should have told him that if he needed to talk he could come and find her. After all, that’s exactly what he had said to her a few weeks ago.

Opening the door to her bedroom, Kari stepped inside and let it close behind her. Walking over to her desk, she sat down and pulled on her headphones. Picking up her music player she pondered for a moment about what album to start with before electing to go with Amarok. She had listened to it a few times recently and it seemed her perseverance was starting to pay off. For like a flower in spring it had slowly started to open up to her. Closing her eyes, she sat back and listened to the opening segment before bothering to pick up her pen. When she eventually looked down at the paper she had been writing she sighed. It would not take too much longer to complete, however, she’d already taken up more of Tai’s time than she probably should have. So dipping into that particular pool of fun again was out of the question. Kari pulled out her phone and sent a quick text to Davis and Yolei to see if either of them were free that evening. If not, she would still have her music to listen to. And could always start converting some more of the clothes her mom had bought for her into something more suited to her style.

##

Tai sat alone within the confines of his bedroom walls. The skies outside were overcast and since he had not bothered to open the blinds that morning, very little light entered the room. Instead, he used the small desk lamp for light. Although at present the only thing it illuminated was the thick mass of chocolate hair that lay sprawled out over the desk surface. In a slow, repetitive motion he banged his forehead against the woodwork. It transpired that spending time with Kari, coupled with the hug she had given him had served only to accelerate her return to the forefront of his thoughts.

An image of his sister, slender and sleek slowly slipped into his mind. Though his eyes were closed, he could see clearly the fine strands of her lit match hair. How the bright orange faded into yellow and then into blonde at the tips. As she had become prone to do in real life, it had been messed up with some wax. Below her choppy bangs, he found those beautiful orbs of reddish-brown and stared deeply into them. Feelings of warmth and love radiated from them and set his soul ablaze. Lower still, passed her petite nose, he found her soft pale-pink lips that tempted him to touch them without her having to utter a single word…

Tears began to form in Tai’s eyes as his right hand reached out and opened the top desk drawer. Reaching into the depths he moved the old stress ball out of the way and located the shard of glass with his fingers. Managing not to cut himself, he withdrew it and placed it on the desk surface. Sitting up straight, his eyes fell upon its blood speckled edge as it glistened in the lamplight, promising him pain and peace in exchange for another taste of his flesh.

_“Just one little slice and Kari goes away,” _a voice in the back of his head encouraged.

“I c…c…can't,” Tai whispered to himself, however, his left hand was already starting to unbutton his shirt sleeve.

_“Of course you can. All you need to do is pick up the glass and let the blood flow. The rest will happen by itself.”_

“No,” he said internally, somehow stopping his left hand in its tracks. “I made a mistake last time because I was desperate.”

_“You’re still desperate,” the voice hissed back. “Or have you failed to notice something important about the image of your little sister that your filthy mind conjured up?”_

Tai froze as a thin film of cold sweat began to cover his forehead and the nape of his neck.

_“Why don’t you take another look…”_

As if at the voices command, the image of Kari floated back into his mind. His eyes widened. So focused on her head he had failed to notice that he’d imagined her completely naked. He could not help but gaze upon the soft mounds of flesh that were her small perky breasts. How badly he wanted to touch them. To caress their smooth skin and fondle her nipples.

_“Still think you aren’t desperate?” _the voice asked, only he did not need to answer. _“Just imagine how bad it will be once your imagination really starts to run wild.”_

“I can handle it,” he fired back inside his own head.

The voice laughed in an evil manner reminiscent of Myotismon, _“and what about when your lust reaches a point that you can’t control yourself? Will you be able to stop yourself from going through to Kari’s room and taking what you want?”_

“Stop it!” Tai cried out as the tears began to flow.

_“I don’t need to stop anything, it’s you who needs to be stopped.”_

“I… I… I…”

_“Just roll up your sleeve and take off the sweatband.”_

With a trembling hand, Tai did as the voice commanded.

_“Now pick up the glass…”_

His hand moved over to where the shard lay, still glistening a ruby red colour in the lamplight. It hovered in the air above it…

_“…pick up the glass, Tai…”_

His fingers froze in fear as his hand spasmed. “No…” he pleaded.

_“PICK IT UP!”_

The voice shattered what little resistance he had left and his fingers descended and closed around the shard.

_“Good, now sink it into your wrist and slice… slowly.”_

Anguish washed over Tai as he pressed the pointed tip of the glass into his forearm. When the blood began to flow he dragged it painfully down until he had a fresh line parallel to the first. The joy that had filled him moments prior, when gazing upon the image of his sister’s face, was quickly obliterated from memory as the pain set in. Kari, it seemed, would not be bothering him again today.


	24. Pt2 15) High hopes

**Part Two: His Secret**

**Chapter Fifteen: High hopes**

Monday had come… and gone. The overcast skies from the weekend had brought a bucket load of rain crashing down upon Odaiba. At lunchtime, the younger DigiDestined, minus TK, had met up at lunchtime for the second week running and had made plans for the four of them, plus Ken, to meet up this coming Friday. At the end of the school day and after a long talk with Yolei, Kari had made the decision to go and see TK again. While the boy had clearly been making a joke the previous week (about seeing her again this Monday), it felt like too much of a light-hearted conversation starter for her to pass up. So like the previous two weeks, she had gone to meet him after the creative writing club had finished. She had caught the smile on his face that he’d tried to hide with a shake of his head. While she’d had to put up with a frosty demeanour, TK had definitely started to melt since two weeks ago. Keeping the conversation away from their relationship, Kari had asked him more about his plans to write down some of their adventures in the Digital world. For the second week running, asking him about his writing had worked like a charm. Even if he’d known exactly what she was doing, he had not been able to resist talking about his passion. Eventually, just before they parted, he had caught her by surprise and asked her a question, _“so what are your plans for the future?” _It was only then when faced with the question upfront, did she realise that she didn’t have any. Her depression having robbed her of any hope or ideas about what she wanted to do with her life. Ultimately, she had been forced to answer, _“I don’t know.” _After they went their separate ways, Kari had been left with something to ponder. What did she want to do with her life?

The rest of the school week had passed with little incident. She had gone over to Yolei’s on Tuesday to study and then to Davis’ place on Thursday to help him with his math homework and then, as a reward for finishing, pounded him into the ground on Super Smash Bros. Melee. Like the previous week, Kari had barely seen hide nor hair of Tai, except at mealtimes. Her brother virtually sealing himself inside his bedroom between one school day ending and another starting.

Come Friday morning, her mom had received a shock phone call saying that her grandmother had fallen ill and had been taken into hospital. While it did not sound life-threatening, it had been enough for her mom to hastily make plans to go and visit her that night and stay the weekend. Her brother had automatically been exempt from the trip due to his schoolwork and, after swearing on Gatomon’s life that she would not get a tattoo, body piercing or do anything else to change her appearance (yes, her mother had actually made her do that), she had been allowed to stay at home too. Her mom had even left her with money to buy food as she would not have time to prepare anything before leaving. The irony of the whole situation had not been lost on Kari. Had the option existed three weeks ago to go with her parents, she would have taken it immediately. However, today she had actively made a promise on her Digimon partner’s life in order to be allowed to stay.

Kari parked her bike in the undercroft and removed the shopping bags from the basket. She’d gone to the store on her way home so she could make something for dinner before she went out for the evening. Climbing up the stairs, she entered the apartment to find it empty. Her father must have gotten away from work early and so her parents had already left. Tai, on the other hand, would only have finished about ten or fifteen minutes ago and so would still be on his way, assuming he planned on coming straight home. A quick check of her phone told her that was not the case. _“Hey, am going to hit the computer lab, have got some work that I need access to the school's system to finish.”_ She looked at the time; 15:55. Her friends planned to meet at 18:00, so she had little choice but to make dinner now and hope that Tai came home soon. If not, he would have to reheat it himself later on.

Entering the kitchen, Kari emptied the groceries onto the work surface and set about the task of making ramen. If she had not been going out, she would have made Tai his favourite to try and cheer him up, however, that would have to wait until tomorrow or Sunday. By quarter past five, dinner was ready but there was still no sign of Tai. With little alternative, she sat down at the table to eat by herself. After she had finished, she went for a quick shower before heading into her bedroom to get ready. Since last Sunday she had been working on making a new outfit from clothes her mom had bought her and tonight seemed like a good night to demo it. And since she did her own laundry, her mom had not yet noticed what she had been doing. From beneath her bed, she pulled out her CD box, selected Crises and put it into her stereo; its green artwork having won it the honour.

The music started and Kari turned her attention to the wardrobe, withdrawing what had once been a pair of plain blue jeans. However, she had cut the left leg off at the knee and used her fabric spray paint to colour the remainder neon yellow. On the other side, she had cut open the knee, sprayed the top half black and the bottom neon yellow and then used stencils to spray the words Digital and Punk on the top and bottom halves respectively, using the alternate colour. She would pair these with the matching converse she’d painted two months ago. For upper body wear, she had dyed a white vest black, put two slashes across its front and a large diagonal one down the back and flecked the edges so it gave the effect that she was bleeding neon yellow blood. Jewellery consisted of the black choker from h.NAOTO, an old black and white checked fabric wristband that she had painstakingly sat and painted so the colours matched the outfit and a silver necklace shaped like a lightning bolt.

Sitting down at her desk, Kari painted her nails to match the colour scheme. The neon yellow nail polish haven taken some time to track down. She then applied eyeshadow of the same colours and a black lipstick she’d picked up at the store on her way home. Standing up she turned to look in the mirror and felt a rush of excitement at how well the outfit had come together. Some wax to mess up her hair finished it off. Before leaving she picked up her short denim jacket and placed her cell phone and purse in the pockets. She would have preferred a black leather one to go with this look, but that was beyond her means at present. Leaving her room behind she glanced up at the living room clock; twenty to six. Tai was still not home, but she needed to leave or she would be late. However, when she reached the apartment door, it opened for her.

“Tai,” she said in happy surprise when his mass of chocolate brown hair appeared in the doorway.

“Hey, Kari,” he replied as he stepped across the threshold, “are you going out?”

She looked him up and down. His skin was pale and there were large dark circles under his eyes; he appeared to be exhausted. Kari immediately felt a pang of guilt at going out and leaving him like this. For a moment she thought about cancelling, but it quickly got washed away in her excitement. However, it did not stop her commenting, “you look terrible, Tai.”

“I’ll be fine,” he replied, even his voice sounded tired. “It’s just been a really long week and I’m feeling beat.”

Kari did not pause to question his reply. “There’s ramen on the stove, all you need to do is heat it up. After that, you should go for a nice hot shower and then get some sleep.”

At the mention of sleep, Tai let out a yawn. “I’ll be sure to do that. Now you go out and have fun.”

She reached up and gave him a quick hug before taking a few steps backwards. “How do I look?” she asked, giving him a smile.

She watched as her brother’s tired eyes took in her appearance. “You do all this yourself?” he asked.

“Yep!”

There was a slight pause, possibly for his tired brain to cobble together the sentence, before Tai said, “you look amazing, Kari.”

She gave him another quick hug and a peck on the cheek before turning them around and stepping backwards out the door. “Get some rest, Tai,” she said with a smile.

Her brother returned the gesture with a weak one of his own. “Have fun, Kari,” he said before softly closing the door.

She turned and headed towards the stairs.

##

It was 6 pm on the dot when Kari arrived at the bowling alley where they had all agreed to meet. Her brief exchange with Tai had cost her what little leeway she’d had. However, as she approached the front door and spotted her friends milling around outside, it quickly became apparent that she was not the last to arrive; Davis was running late.

“Hey guys,” she greeted, addressing the other three that had made it on time.

“Hey, Kar… holy crap you look awesome,” Yolei exclaimed as she turned to face her, jaw almost hitting the sidewalk.

“I think it’s my turn to punish Yolei for checking out girls,” Ken said smoothly, clearly extracting some measure of revenge on his girlfriend for what had occurred the last time they had all met up. “Hello, Kari,” he added, nodding his head at her.

“I wasn’t checking her out, simply complimenting her on her outfit,” the lavender haired girl fired back hotly. “There’s a difference!”

“Yeah, the difference is that if it was any of the guys doing it, you’d be the first to call it ogling,” Cody chipped in; the boy had become a lot braver after having taken a growth spurt and spending some time in the gym.

Yolei made to round on him, but Kari elected to intercede. “People, there’s no need to argue over little old me,” she said with a sassy grin. “I like you all equally.”

“Causing trouble again, Kamiya.” As a collective, the assembled members of the group turned their heads to look at the late arrival. “You go to all that trouble to put us back together only to set us off fighting amongst ourselves. You really are evil now,” Davis added with a wide grin. “For what it’s worth, you look ridiculously hot.”

She gave him a wink, “nice of you to notice.”

“Hey guys,” Davis then said to the remainder of the group.

Kari raised a hand to cover her eyes and shook her head. He could be such an airhead sometimes. Three, two, one…

“Why the hell does she get a compliment and I don’t!” Yolei yelled, turning the rage Kari had prevented her from unleashing on Cody onto the goggle head instead.

Davis’ noticeably took a step backwards and raised up his hands to shield himself from the girl’s assault. “Because you’re already spoken for and I don’t want to get on the wrong side of Ken,” he replied quickly, obviously not seeing the issue.

“Or maybe it’s because you think she’s prettier than me!”

Before Davis could reply, Cody turned to Kari and said, “should I give him a shovel to help dig his own grave with?”

She had to stifle a laugh, as she had no intention of turning the girl’s wrath in their direction. For like a rampaging bull, Yolei had a tendency to round on anyone who drew her attention. Fortunately, Davis did exactly as Cody had predicted.

“Well, yeah, I mean she is…”

“WHAT!”

“There’s no point getting worked up, Yolei,” a new voice said from behind them. “Davis will probably have a thing for Kari until the day he dies.”

The argument ceased as everyone turned their heads.

“TK,” Kari said softly, unable to utter anything louder due to sheer amazement. “You came.”

“Don’t go getting all mushy on me, Kamiya,” the blonde haired boy replied dryly. “I only came because I needed some help remembering in what order Ken sent his flunkies after us. That and I hoped it would stop you bugging me every Monday after creative writing club.”

Instead of replying, she shot Davis a look that said, ‘now would be a good time to clear the air’.

The boy nodded in response. And she got the distinct impression that he would rather apologise to the other boy than go back to being chewed out by Yolei. “Hey, TK,” Davis said as he held out a hand, “we might have beat each other up, but in the end, neither of us got Kari. So no hard feelings?”

She watched the pair’s eyes lock and for a moment it felt as though her heart was in her mouth. Since she had never really expected this eventuality to arise, she hadn’t bothered to suggest to Davis what he might say beyond being the one to offer peace. However, if she had of done, it would not have been a, ‘we both lost so let’s get over it’, approach. As a few seconds of silence ticked by, Kari became increasingly worried that she would have to say something to try and broker an agreement.

However, TK then took the offered hand. “I guess we have something else in common now,” he said with a wry smile, “so no hard feelings.”

While the others made their welcomes, Kari breathed a sigh of relief. Yet at the same time still could not believe that TK had actually come. It seemed that everything she had thought impossible three weeks ago was now actually happening. If she could make this work, maybe she would have a shot at getting all twelve DigiDestined in the same room together after all. Internally she shook her head, that was getting way too far ahead of herself. What’s more the rift between her brother, Matt and Sora was quite possibly worse than the one between TK and herself at its peak. Add her into the mix and it became a barrel of gunpowder. The other girl would not likely have forgotten their fight and how her face had been clawed.

“Are you coming?”

The sound of a voice directed at her drew Kari out of her musings. She looked up to see TK staring at her and that the others had already gone inside. “Sure,” she replied and followed him into the building. “Are you going to be able to play?” she asked when her eyes fell on his cast.

He held up his other hand, “this is my good hand, remember?” She actually had to think for a moment before recalling that it was true. “You didn’t seriously think I would break the wrist of my good hand over you?” he then added with a humorous laugh.

Kari joined in. While the comment had contained a dig, she let it slide. If this was what TK needed to do to try and help himself be around her, she would tolerate it for now. Hopefully, given time, he would be able to accept her as a proper friend once more and not feel the need to pretend to himself that he still disliked her.

##

They had split into two teams of three to play two games of bowling. Davis, who for some reason seemed to think that, because she could now kick his ass at video games, Kari would now rule at everything, immediately called dibs. She had watched in amusement as TK, who had somehow managed to keep a straight face, said, _“she’s all yours,” _before promptly aligning himself with Ken. As he passed her to join his new comrade on the other side of the divided, he’d whispered, _“he’s never seen you bowl, has he?”_ He had given her a smile when she had replied, _“nope.”_ Yolei had naturally joined Ken, leaving Cody to team up with Davis and herself.

Just like old times, they had all shared a laugh at Davis’ expense when Kari had taken her first turn. This was compounded when it transpired that, like with almost everything else in life, Ken was a great bowler. It was in that regard, after his team had pounded Davis’ into the ground that the goggle head asked, “you know I’ve always wondered, if Ken is so good at everything, how on earth did we manage to beat him time and again when he was doing his whole Digimon Emperor thing?”

Everyone turned to look at Ken who, with a smile, replied, “I used to ask myself that all the time.”

They all laughed before Yolei said, “I always thought it was because we worked so well together as a team.”

Ken grinned, “funny, I thought it was because you had better Digimon on your side than I did.” He received a punch in the arm from his girlfriend for that comment.

“Maybe it was both,” Kari suggested, “or maybe neither. However, I’m pretty sure we can all agree that it wasn’t Davis’ brains.”

Everyone bar the boy she’d singled outburst into a fit of hysterics. When he began to protest about how unfair the comment was, Kari shot TK a wink. “Hey, that’s not funny. I’m just as smart as all of you bar Ichijouji.”

Like they were back on the lanes, Kari had set up the pins for TK to effortlessly knock down. “Sorry, Davis, but only you are dumb enough to want Kari on your team without ever seeing her bowl.”

The laughter erupted once more as they all stopped at the desk to exchange bowling shoes for regular ones. They then hit the arcade, where Kari proceeded to beat all five of them, one after the other, at Street Fighter. When they eventually left, they headed to the same pancake shop from two weeks ago, the conversation splitting three ways while they walked. Inside, they followed a waitress to a table flanked by a pair of red booths. When they were all seated, Davis and Ken were still discussing the arcade.

“…I’m telling you, she’s like some sort of video gaming assassin. She handed my ass to me at Mario Kart after the last time we hung out and then Smash Bros last night,” she heard the former say.

“Hard to believe, but based on the thrashing she just gave us, I’m inclined to agree with you. Do you think she really can beat Tai?”

It was only upon hearing her brother’s name that Kari gave any thought to him since she had left the apartment. He really had looked dreadful, she mused. Maybe she should have stayed home to look after him. She felt the guilt that had been washed away earlier by her excitement return with a vengeance. He would have cancelled any plans to stay home with her if it had been roles reversed. She was a terrible sister, doubled by the fact she was supposed to be in love with him and tripled given how he had reacted upon finding out her secret. As fun as this evening had been, she now felt a need to go home. However, given that she had orchestrated events and that TK now seemed to have settled back into the group, she could not bail. Glancing out of the window, Kari’s eyes were drawn to the blood-stained sky; a result of the sunset. When a feeling of dread washed over her, she could only hope that the view before her was not an omen.


	25. Pt2 16) The final cut

**Part Two: His Secret**

**Chapter Sixteen: The final cut**

The apartment door clicked shut and Tai let out a ragged breath. Robotically he raised a hand to his cheek and rubbed the spot where his sister’s supple black lips had kissed him moments prior. Had she not seemed so caught up in the thrill of going out for the evening, he suspected she would have cancelled her plans and stayed with him. And that almost certainly would have been game over; Kari knew him too well. In his current state, half-truths about his schoolwork getting the better of him would not have flown had she decided to give him her full attention. Sooner or later, she would have got it out of him… all of it. He did not want to imagine how horrified she would be if she saw his right arm.

Exhausted, Tai staggered towards his room as though his body were on autopilot. The brightness of the apartment living space had been hurting his tired eyes, so when he entered his dark room he did not turn on the light; the blinds were already shut. Without really thinking about what he was doing, he discarded his bag onto the floor. His blazer, shirt and tie soon followed. Going to his desk, he opened the top drawer and withdrew the shard of blood-stained glass. A macabre sense of calm washed over him when he felt its smooth surface between his thumb and forefinger. The edge glinted menacingly in a stray beam of light that found its way between a gap in the blinds.

“Soon,” he whispered to it in a placating manner.

Walking to the top of the room, Tai sat down on the floor and leaned his naked back against the wall. He felt a shiver run down his spine as his warm skin made contact with the cooler surface. Pulling the black sweatband from his right wrist he discarded it before starting to unwrap the latest bandage. On Monday, after the pain from the previous days cut had ebbed enough to let Kari back into his mind, he had stopped at a pharmacy on his way home from school and bought his own set of first aid supplies. Already aware of what he intended to do once safe in his bedroom and pre-empting the problem where the family box ran out and someone noticed before he had a chance to replenish it. It had also served to eliminate the danger that someone would catch him on his way to the bathroom. That night, after dinner, he had made his third cut.

Eyes vacant, Tai stared at the collection of scabs, which were at various points of healing. They numbered six in total. Every day this week, at some point during school, the pain had lessened just enough to allow his sister to slip back into his thoughts. And each time she did, he saw her in some form of provocative attire, enticing him towards her with the promise of giving him everything if only he would tell her his secret. The longer it took him to get home, the more he fell under her enchantment. Like a succubus, Kari had taken hold inside his mind. With only the sweet pain that came when he felt the glass shard cut into his flesh able to drive her out. He’d told himself that he needed to stay strong, needed to keep going, needed to protect his sister from himself and his dark secret. However, he knew that only the promise of the shard had kept him going through each day and prevented him from succumbing. Once safe in his room, he had added a new cut to his collection.

It had not been easy. Every time, the weak part of him had tried to protest, tried to tell him it was wrong. Found new arguments and excuse to try and dissuade him from doing what needed to be done. Last night it had even invoked his sister’s name. Yes, his own weak, pathetic self, had tried to use Kari against him. Argued that it would break her heart to know that he was hurting himself like this. It had been a low blow, a cowards move to make. And he was no coward. For he bore the crest of courage. A representation of his strongest trait. Something that would help him conquer this weakness inside him and endure all the pain it would take to help protect his sister.

“No… please…” the weak boy whispered as he held the glass out in front of him.

_“Quiet, fool,” _he hissed in reply. _“There is no other way.”_

He held out his shaking right wrist, only for a third voice to halt his progress, “Tai,” the sweet, seductive voice of Kari said inside his head as an image of her dressed exactly as he had seen her tonight filled his mind. “Come to me, Tai. Come to me and tell me your secret,” she snaked her body as she spoke.

“Please… listen to her,” the weakling moaned. “She can help us.”

_“No! She does not know what she is saying. We must protect her at all costs,” he argued back._

The image of his sister still danced around inside his mind, her movements accentuating her assets. “You can end it all, Tai. All the pain, the suffering… the longing. You can end it all if you just come to me.”

_“Shut up!” _Tai yelled internally. _“You do not know what pain I am saving you from… what torment.”_

Tears started to pour down the cheeks of his unmoving face. His expression had gone vacant and his eyes had taken on the black holes in the skies appearance as they stared through his outstretched hands. “I… c…c…can’t… k…keep… going,” the weak boy’s frail voice said in a manner that could only be described as the echo of a ghost.

“Then come to me,” Kari said softly, holding out a hand for him to take. “I can ease your pain.”

_“No! This is for your own good,” _Tai barked at the image of his sister. _“If you remain ignorant, you’ll remain happy. I have to do this… for you.”_

He could almost feel the warmth of Kari’s fingertips on his shoulder as she reached out an illusionary hand to touch him. “You don’t have to do this alone, Tai. Let me help you.”

_“No!”_

“Please… you have to… I… c…c…cant…”

_“Shut up”_

“Come to me, Tai…”

_“No!”_

“…please…”

“…Tai…”

_“NO!”_

In a sudden overload of emotions, Tai slashed at his wrist with the shard. The glass tore through his flesh in a small splutter of crimson. Then slipped from his hand and landed on the wooden floor. In the silence of his dark bedroom, the small clinking sound it made on impact sounded like Vulcan's hammer hitting an anvil. His now empty left hand slowly fell through the air and landed lifeless beside him. Though his eyes saw the blood begin to pool on his wrist and then start to spill over the edge, it did not register with his brain. In fact, nothing did, as his eyes simply continued to stare through the floor. He had no concept of anything around him or even himself for that matter. And he certainly did not know that this would be his final cut.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors Note:   
Hey, Guys. Thank you for taking the time to read part two, I hope you all enjoyed it. If so, please do leave some kudos or even a review. I really do want to hear all your thoughts on it. And I hope to maybe see you all sometime in the future.


	26. Pt2 Epilogue pt1: Comfortably numb

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who has read this story and to all of you who have left me Kudos. Specifically, my thanks go out to lanico, for leaving me such a positive comment. This two-part epilogue is thus dedicated to you; enjoy.

**Part Two: His Secret**

**Epilogue part one: Comfortably numb**

It was five-past-ten and the lit streetlamps, closed shops and night time travellers all passed Kari Kamiya by in a blur as she hurried home. All the while, dark clouds rolled in to cover the sky. She could not explain it, but deep inside the feeling of dread she’d experienced back in the pancake shop, had slowly intensified. Something was very wrong tonight and she knew it concerned her brother. The signs had been there during her brief encounter with him earlier that evening and she had allowed her excitement to overrule her judgement. The place she’d needed to be tonight was at home, with her brother. Not gallivanting with friends.

It had been a struggle to force herself to eat a small portion of pancakes and continue to laugh and joke like nothing was wrong. However, every minute that ticked by while still sitting in the shop served only to heighten her fear. Eventually, they had decided to call it a night, although if Davis had gotten his way they would have gone to a karaoke bar until eleven o’clock turf out time. Fortunately, he had been overruled. She had still been forced to walk Ken and Yolei to the train station; the lavender haired girl was staying with him over the weekend. It had been agonising waiting for their train to arrive and only after what felt like the longest set of goodbyes in history, could she turn and head for home.

Sprinting up the stairs of the apartment building, Kari startled an elderly couple and, uncharacteristically, did not stop to apologise. Her rudeness would probably travel along the washing lines for the next few days and while neither individual would likely be able to name her, someone would eventually deduce her identity from whatever description they could give. If her mother found out about it, she’d receive the riot act. Darting to the front door, she barrelled across the threshold, panting for breath. Stooping, she fumbled with the laces of her black and neon yellow converse, practically wrenching them off her feet when they came loose and discarding her short denim jacket atop them. A quick scan of the living area revealed it to be empty.

“Tai,” Kari called out as she passed the kitchen, noticing he had not touched her ramen. That put her even more on edge. Tai not eating was virtually unheard of.

No response.

She made her way to his bedroom door, knocked and called out to him again, “Tai?”

Silence.

A chilling sensation washed over her and goosebumps formed on her skin as she gripped the metal handle and twisted. The door opened onto a sea of black and her eyes were immediately drawn to her brother's bed; empty. Shifting her gaze towards the back of the room she caught sight of his legs spread wide across the floor. Hastily she fumbled for the light switch, managing to take in his slumped form before she found it. Kari’s hands immediately covered her mouth as the lightbulb flickered to life and illuminated Tai’s limp body; his muscular torso on full display. Oh, God!

“Tai!” Kari exclaimed as she rushed towards him.

While part of her wanted to break down into tears, to yell at herself that this was all her fault, she somehow managed to keep it together. Heart hammering she skidded down onto her knees beside him. Tai’s right arm sat limp amidst a small pool of thick, cold blood that ran from a gash on his wrist. What had he done?

“Tai,” she said frantically, lifting his slumped head by the chin and placing her fingers on his carotid artery. She breathed a sigh of relief when she felt a pulse; it was slightly slow but steady. His eyes opened a crack, however, when she met his gaze it looked so hollow she felt as though he was looking through, not at her.

Hurriedly glancing around, Kari scampered across the floor and picked up her brothers discarded school shirt. Returning to his side, she lifted his arm out of the blood pool and wiped it clean. Her mouth fell open and her eyes widened in horror upon discovering a collection of six older cuts in his wrist. Bar one, none of them could be more than a week old. Instinctively her gaze shifted to his other arm. A single long, fading scab ran for about three inches between his wrist and elbow. She knew self-harm when she saw it. Hell, she’d even contemplated it more than once over the past year, however, she had always been too frightened to actually cut herself. Tai, it seemed, had not. What had driven him to do this to himself in little over a week? Surely he had not been struggling under the pressure of his schoolwork this much… had he?

Kari thought back over the past two weeks. Ever since his date with Teiko, he had been conspicuous by his absence except for at mealtimes. Where he had said little and quickly excused himself to go and do his homework. Her heart sank when she thought about last Sunday. Something had been off about him then, however, she had believed him when he said it was purely schoolwork related. She should have trusted her instincts when she had hugged him that day. That feeling that he was wounded in some way, that need to protect him, those had been the warning signs and she had ignored them. Then tonight… tonight she had allowed that wave of excitement to carry her out the front door without allowing herself to sense the danger. Her heart almost burst with guilt and regret. How could she have been so stupid?

Blood started to flow once more from the large gash so Kari quickly wrapped the shirt around it and tied it tight using the sleeves. She gazed into Tai’s vacant eyes once more. “You’re going to be ok,” she said reassuringly and gave his cold hand a light squeeze. “I’ll be back in a moment.”

She watched as her brother opened his mouth and mumbled, “…no… you’re supposed to be gone…”

“I’m not gone, Tai, I’m right here. However, I need to leave for a few moments to fetch something to help you.”

Her brother’s voice sounded desperate when he whispered, “…the pain… supposed to… rid of you…”

His eyes began to roll and his head slumped, however, Kari knew she needed to keep him conscious. “Tai, stay with me,” she said, feeling panic start to rise as she gave him a light shake. When he did not respond she uttered, “sorry, Tai,” and did the only thing she could think of, she slapped him across the face. “Tai Kamiya, don’t you dare try and run away from me!” she barked with slightly more force than she’d intended.

Tai’s eyes snapped open and she could see a lucidity that had not existed moments prior. 

“Now, you’re going to wait here until I get back and you’re not going to fall asleep. Understood?”

After a few seconds, he nodded his head. Satisfied that he’d come around enough that she could leave him for a minute or two, Kari gave his hand a light squeeze, before standing up and hurrying from the room.

##

Tai’s mind was at sea as it swam in a swirling soup of screaming voices. All conscious thoughts and feelings had left him some time ago, yet he did not have the capacity to tell how long that had been exactly. All that existed now were the voices as they fought over his carcase. Eventually, they simply became background noise to his comfortable state of numbness. It was nice here, serene almost. There was no pain, suffering or longing for his sister, simply… nothing.

A blinding light from somewhere outside his bubble, burst into life and forced his eyes to close. Behind them, Tai suddenly became aware of a throbbing sensation. _“No…” _he moaned internally. Why did this… this… thing have to rouse this sensation within him? Why couldn’t it leave him be? He didn’t want to think or feel anymore, for it simply hurt too much, he just wanted to remain numb. A series of incoherent noises followed after which something akin to a touch registered with his brain. His eyes involuntarily opened a crack, but he could make out nothing other than a bright blur, which caused the throb to intensify somewhat. Why couldn’t this light, wherever it had come from, just leave him alone?

Against his will, he became aware of an extremity, as something coarse rubbed against it before taking it in a vice-like grip. His arm, if memory served. He groaned internally. He didn’t want to have arms anymore, or anything for that matter. Having things just made you hurt. Through his vacant eyes, part of the blur began to take on a more defined form. He could see lips, black as night open in front of him. Then a voice cut through the background noise like the shard had his flesh, “you’re going to be ok.” He felt pressure in his cold hand before it continued, “I’ll be back in a moment.”

“No…” Tai wailed, though it came out as more of a mumble, “…you’re supposed to be gone…”

His brain recognised the face before him now, a face he’d hoped never to see again; Kari. How had she managed to return? It wasn’t fair! He had done what he needed to do in order to drive her away for good. So how could she possibly be here now? She should be gone.

He almost cried when her soft, sweet voice spoke again. “I’m not gone, Tai, I’m right here. However, I need to leave for a few moments to fetch something to help you.”

He cried out in desperation, “the pain was supposed to get rid of you for good,” but only a handful of the words managed to escape from his mouth. He allowed his eyes to roll as a grim realisation began to set in; the shard had lied to him. Meaning that his only escape would be to become comfortably…

A sound like a thunderclap rang through his brain and Tai felt a strong stinging sensation flood through him from his left cheek. His eyes snapped open, but it was his ears that next came under assault.

“Tai Kamiya, don’t you dare try and run away from me!” Kari’s voice reached deep inside him and practically hauled him to the surface.

He looked upon his sister’s face, finally coming to the realisation that she did not simply exist as a construct of his own imagination. The real Kari was actually here.

“Now, you’re going to wait here until I get back and you’re not going to fall asleep. Understood?”

Tai could only nod in response to her instruction. His brain still trying to comprehend where he was, what had happened and, most importantly, how she could possibly be here. From his position on the floor, he watched her exit the room. Leaving him with only a solitary source of light.

## 

Kari’s mind whirred with questions that she needed answers to as she fetched the first aid kit from the cupboard beneath the bathroom sink along with a clean cloth and towel. Without pausing for breath, she headed straight for the kitchen to fill a bowl with warm water. Counting herself lucky that their parents had been forced to go and visit her grandmother in hospital. For she would have had serious difficulty in hiding this from them. Although whether or not she hypothetically should/would have, she did not know. Ultimately, the answer would probably depend on what explanations Tai could give. Or rather, what the actual truth of the matter was. She had no intention of swallowing any bullshit.

Supplies in hand, Kari swiftly returned to her brother’s bedroom. He had not moved but she could see immediately that his eyes were focused now. Crossing over to him, she knelt down on his right side and picked up his arm. The shirt that served as a makeshift tourniquet had been resting in the pool of blood, so she could not tell if any from his wound had soaked through.

“Kari?” Tai asked in a quiet voice when she started to untie the knot.

“I told you I’d be back,” she replied in a kind tone, tossing the blood-drenched shirt aside.

Soaking the cloth in the bowl of warm water, she rung it out before using it to clean his forearm. The wound, once clearly visible, did not remain so for long as blood started to trickle out again. She swore internally. He would be lucky if she could get it to stop by herself. Should he need stitches… that would be an entirely different ball game. But suffice it to say, Tai would not likely be allowed to leave the emergency room straight after receiving treatment. She shook her head. She would cross that bridge only if she had to.

“What are you doing here? I thought you were going out?”

Kari looked up at her brother when she heard the questions. “I did go out,” she replied, her tone laced with guilt and remorse. She applied some pressure to the cloth. “When I came home I was worried about you, so came to see if you were ok.”

“Oh,” Tai said, a look of confusion spreading across his face. “What time is it?”

“It’ll be well after 10 pm by now.”

With one hand she held the cloth in place, while she used the other to open the first aide box and withdraw the bottle of antiseptic. She had to hold it between her thighs in order to unscrew the cap one-handed. Placing a wad of cotton wool over the top she inverted the bottle until it became soaked.

“Sorry, Tai, but this is going to hurt,” she warned as she pulled the cloth away and pressed the antiseptic soaked cotton wool against the cut.

Her brother let out a silent scream as his body convulsed for a few moments before returning to rest. While she knew it caused him pain, Kari did not rush. If by some miracle she could get the bleeding to stop, it would be foolish to allow the wound to become infected. It took several wads to thoroughly clean the whole thing. Once satisfied, she dried off his forearm with the towel.

“Hold this,” she instructed, physically moving Tai’s right hand across his body and placing it atop the towel-covered wound. “Apply as much pressure as you can.”

“You don’t have to do this, Kari,” he then said as she removed her hands. “I can deal with it myself.”

Her hand stopped halfway towards the first aid box when she heard his words. The idea of him even suggesting that she would leave him to handle it himself was laughable. However, she suspected that it was a feeble attempt on his part to try and continue hiding what he’d been doing. And while she knew that he needing care, compassion and understanding, there were some things that she would need to be strict about. For she could not allow him to continue with this self-destructive behaviour. Staring directly into his eyes, she gave him a stern look. “Like you did with all the others?” she asked rhetorically.

The expression that formed on her brother’s face suggested that it had only just dawned on him that she would have seen all his previous cuts. He opened his mouth to say something, but she cut him off. “Don’t bother trying to talk your way out of this, Tai. I know exactly what you’ve done to yourself.” She could see the fear in his chocolate eyes but knew she needed to remain firm. Whether at present Tai would accept it or not, he needed her to stay strong and not let him dodge his way around the issue. “Now, I’m going to try my best to get this to stop bleeding. If I can, then we’re going to sit down and you’re going to tell me everything. If not, then I’m going to have to take you to the emergency room.”

He nodded meekly by way of a reply. Only then did she release his gaze and turn her attention back to the first aid box. Opening a fresh packet of gauze, Kari doubled it over to try and maximise the amount there would be to soak up the blood. While this was not the time for reminiscing, she could not help but remember a time when they were kids. He had cut his knee while playing football and when he’d come home, she had sat with this same box and put some Elastoplast over it for him. It had not been the last time she’d patched him up either. After cutting a fresh bandage, she took control of the towel back from him. As quickly as she could, Kari lifted it away from the wound and replaced it with the gauze. Grabbing the bandage, she placed it over the top and wrapped it tightly around his forearm; using microporous tape to secure the ends.

“Now we wait,” she breathed in concern as she began cleaning up the mess.

After mopping up the pool of blood on the floor, it became apparent that the cloth, towel and Tai’s shirt would need to be disposed of. For she doubted that any number of cold saltwater washes or stain removers would be able to get them clean. It was while searching for any spots of blood she might have missed, that she found the shard of glass. Picking it up, she looked closely at its glistening crimson tinged edge. Never again would it taste her brother’s flesh she decided as she dumped it in the bin beside his desk, along with everything else that needed to go. When she had finished cleaning, she looked at Tai’s wrist. There was no sign of blood soaking through… yet.

“Do you think you can stand?” she asked, deciding that, if possible, it would be best to move him onto his bed.

He nodded, “if you help me.”

Kari moved to crouch at his left-hand side and draped his arm over her shoulder. Tai haphazardly pulled his knees towards his chest and they stood up together. With difficulty, largely due to the fact that her brother was both unsteady on his feet and weighed a tonne, she guided him over to the bed and helped him sit down. Propping his pillows against the headboard, she then lifted his legs for him so that he could lie back.

“I’m going to go make you a cup of sweet tea and then we’re going to talk,” Kari said in a no-nonsense tone. She then glanced at his wrist; still nothing. “However, if I see any blood on that we won’t have a choice but to go to the emergency room.”

She could see in his eyes, that Tai was weighing up which option he liked least. Either having to tell her the truth, or the potential of being held in the hospital to undergo a psychiatric evaluation and thus their parents finding out. Eventually, he said, “let’s hope your first aid skills are still up to scratch.”

Kari nodded her head in agreement. “Now don’t try to move and don’t even think of falling asleep,” she then said, echoing the warning she had given to him the last time she’d left the room.

He gave her a weak smile. “I promise I won’t move from the bed, but you know how close me and sleep are.”

“Fall asleep and I’ll make you wish I’d called an ambulance instead of trying to deal with it myself,” she laughed, even though she did not find it funny.

Before leaving she found a t-shirt in his wardrobe and tossed it over to him. “Put that on,” she said on her way to the door. She saw the small nod of his head before she left the room and headed for the kitchen.


	27. Pt2 Epilogue pt2: A saucerful of secrets

**Part Two: His Secret**

**Epilogue Part Two: A saucerful of secrets**

Tai watched his sister leave the room for a second time and sighed as he shook his head. He’d really gone and blown it this time. The funny thing was he couldn’t even recall what had happened. He’d cut himself, obviously, but beyond that, he did not know. The last thing he could concretely remember was Kari hugging him on her way out and then the apartment door closing behind her. After that, he could only surmise that he’d gone to his room, stripped off his upper body clothing, fetched the glass shard from his desk, then sat down on the floor and at some later point cut himself. However, his lack of memory of the incident was not the problem. The real issue was, what on earth would he say when Kari started asking questions?

Lie upon lie, ranging from too much pressure at school to problems with the soccer team, crossed his mind but he knew she would see through them all. Even the one about how he felt their mom had stopped loving him after **the** incident when he was eight, would probably not suffice. That only left him with two options. Refuse to talk, which would probably result in her threatening to tell their parents, or tell her the truth. The magnitude of this decision weighed heavily on him, but he had little time in which to make it, for Kari would return soon. This entire scenario had come about because he had tried to protect her from the truth. Could he really tell her that he was in love with her? What other option did he have? Even if he refused and she told their parents everything, he would still have to deal with the pressure of keeping it a secret. And look how well that had worked out the first time around.

Outside in the hallway, he heard the sound of approaching footsteps. It seemed that thinking time was over. He would have to make a decision.

Kari walked back into the room and placed a tray containing two steaming cups of tea, a tall glass of water and a plate of cookies on his bedside cabinet. He watched as she crossed over to his desk and fetched his chair. Placing it beside his bed, she sat down and indicated the water, “drink the water and then the tea. You need to replace body fluids and blood sugar.”

He did as she instructed and with a shaking hand, picked the glass up off the tray. Only when the cool liquid flowed past his lips did he realise that his mouth and throat were both exceptionally dry. Beside him, Kari patiently sipped her tea, her eyes fixed upon his bandaged right wrist. She seemed content to wait until he had finished the glass of water before commencing her interrogation. In that respect, Tai took his time. Maybe he would get lucky and she would spot some blood. After about five minutes of silence, the glass had emptied but the bandage remained unbloodied.

“So,” Kari eventually said when he set the glass back down on the tray, “when did all of this start?”

Tai let out a sigh and picked up the cup of tea. “A week past Sunday,” he answered truthfully, thankful that she had not immediately gone for the jugular.

“What happened?”

“I had trouble concentrating on my school work,” he began, electing to omit the cause for now. “I got so frustrated that I threw a glass against the wall. It shattered and some of the shards ended up beneath my wardrobe.” He paused to take a mouthful of tea. It tasted sweet almost to the point of being undrinkable, but then again, that was the point. “When I went to clean it up, one of the shards sliced my arm.” He held out his left arm for her to inspect the fading scab. “I had no problem concentrating after dressing the wound.”

Kari tilted her head, a ponderous look on her face. “The pain helped you concentrate?” she asked. “How?”

“Because I was constantly aware of it, I think it kept me in the here and now.”

His sister picked up a cookie from the plate and held it out to him. “You should eat this,” she said, before asking, “if it was an accident, how did you end up self-harming?”

Tai took the offered cookie and bit into it. After the sweetness of the tea, it almost tasted bitter. He chewed and swallowed before answering, “everything was fine until Tuesday when the pain from the accident subsided. I couldn’t concentrate that night and come Wednesday I had a mountain of work I needed to get done, but could barely do a thing.” He screwed up his eyes when he realised that he could not look at her. Warm tears began to run down his cheeks as a wave of shame and anguish crashed down upon him. “I found the shard of glass underneath the wardrobe and…” he cried as he gripped at the bedsheets. “…I did a stupid thing.”

He felt a warm hand take hold of his own.

“It’s ok, Tai,” Kari soothed. “Everyone makes stupid mistakes. I know I certainly have. However, the important thing is that we get to the root of the problem and find a way to fix it. I’ll be here for you every step of the way.”

His eyes opened to the warmth and love that radiated from his sister’s; even with the green and black eyeshadow. And he knew she meant every word. The only problem being that she was the problem. “I cut myself again last Sunday and once every night since,” he paused when he thought about this evening. “I’m not sure what happened this evening.”

“That’s ok.” He followed Kari’s gaze to his right arm. It seemed that her bandage was holding out. “It doesn’t matter now. You’re safe and it’s looking like you might avoid a trip to the emergency room.” She then looked him directly in the eyes. “So why did you have such difficulty concentrating that you had to resort to inflicting pain upon yourself.”

Though emoting caring and kindness, Tai found that he could not hold his sister’s gaze, such was the intensity of her stare. Averting his eyes to look at his bandaged wrist he remained silent. How could he tell her the truth, knowing full well that it could ultimately destroy her happiness?

“Tai, talk to me,” Kari said, her voice somehow soft but firm. “Whatever it is, I can help. You just have to trust me, like I trusted you.”

The mention of the trust she’d placed in him felt like a bullet ripping through his heart. Kari had told him her deepest secret, even though she’d feared his reaction. Whereas on the flip side, he knew beforehand that she would not respond negatively and still could not do it. Some bearer of courage he was. “I… can’t…” he cried as more tears poured forth.

“Tai, look at me,” he heard her say. When he failed to move his head Kari said it again only more forceful, “Tai, look at me!”

As though compelled by her command, he slowly turned his head so that his tear-stained chocolate eyes met her warm reddish-browns.

“If you can’t talk to me, who can you talk to?” his sister then said as she took hold of his other hand and gave both a light squeeze. “I should have trusted you two years ago but didn’t. Please don’t make the same mistake I did.”

At that moment, the overpowering sense of love and warmth he felt from his sister eroded the last of his resistance. “It’s you,” he whispered. “You’re the reason I’ve been unable to focus on anything.”

A look of shock spread across Kari’s face at this revelation. When she said nothing, Tai continued, “I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you. No matter what I did, you occupied every space inside my mind. The pain was the only thing that drove you away and allowed me to concentrate.”

It was his sister’s turn to whisper, “but why? Why were you thinking about me? Is it because of what I told you?”

Tai squeezed her hands and looked deep into her eyes. It was now or never. “Yes,” he said his voice close to breaking. “It took me time to realise and accept it but…” Here it came, the words he’d been so desperate to say, yet had done everything he could to avoid uttering, “…I’m in love with you, Kari.”

##

Tai’s words, spoken in a cracked and near broken whisper, hit Kari with the same force as a bullet train. Surely she had misheard… or her brother had misspoken. It wasn’t possible that he had just said… what she thought he had. She searched his damp chocolate eyes and saw nothing but sincerity. No… it was inconceivable. He couldn’t have… could he?

She opened and closed her mouth once… twice… and on the third time managed to ask, “did you just say that…” she paused as her trembling lips struggled to form the words, “…that you’re in love with me?”

She had to be sure. Had to hear him confirm what he had said. Only then would she even contemplate that it was true.

The few seconds of silence between her asking the question and her brother’s reply were so agonisingly painful that Kari almost burst into tears. Eventually, after what felt like an eternity, Tai nodded his head and said, “yes. I’m in love with you Kari.”

Kari’s reddish-brown eyes widened on receiving confirmation that she had not misheard. Yet still, she could not believe it. Only another glance into those big chocolate eyes told her that he had not lied. Tai was in love with her. She had no idea what to say, do or even think. This could not possibly be real, could it? 

##

For a minute, time stood still as the siblings gazed into each other’s tearful eyes. Neither one able to process the tidal waves of emotion that flooded them. Tentatively, both a little scared and nervous, they leaned forward. Hands still interlocked, their lips joined in the most delicate of kisses; that held more love than either of them had ever thought possible. What lay ahead, they did not know and nor did they care. For in this wondrous of moments all they had and all they needed was each other. And the only thing both Tai and Kari knew for certain was that they had each found their soulmate in the other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for taking the time to read The love we share. If you enjoyed this story, please do leave me some Kudos or even drop me a comment. I would really enjoy hearing all your thoughts on this story. A third part is on its way and should hopefully land with you sometime this coming week. I hope to see you all once it does. 
> 
> Regards
> 
> Niaxi


	28. Pt3 01) Where we start

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone and welcome to part three of The love we share. I would first like to thank those of you that have left me some Kudos and to lanico & Anon for leaving me a comment. It is very much appreciated.  
Like the previous two parts, part three was a joy to write and at some point, chapter 11 I think, the story passes the 100K word mark. A point I never imagined it would reach when I first started writing it. In this part, there are a few chapters that I have written from a dual point-of-view (such as chapter one). This is something that I have never done before so I hope they read well. There are also a couple of chapters with content of a sexual nature and I will leave a note at the start of these chapters for those of you who find reading such material uncomfortable.   
On a side note, for those of you that might be interested, the chapter titles up to this point, have been taken from song or album titles by British prog-rock band Pink Floyd. Each one was selected because either the title fit the chapter in either a literal or metaphorical sense, or in a few cases because the song itself fits the events. However, from this point on, I have had to widen the pool to include songs from the band members solo works. Otherwise, we might end up with a chapter titled something like, The grand vizer's garden party or Up the Khyber.  
So without any more delay, here is part three. I hope you all enjoy it. If so, please leave me some Kudos or a comment.

**Part Three: Their Secret**

**Chapter One: Where we start**

The sun had set and a dark cloud bank was steadily rolling across the night time Odaiba sky. In one of the Tokyo wards many apartment buildings, the lights were steadily going out one by one, as the residents decided it was time for bed. Up on the third floor, behind a door marked ‘Kamiya’, this was not the case. While the owners of the property had left the city earlier that day, their two children remained at home; alone.

Tai and Kari Kamiya were both holed up in the formers small bedroom. The elder sibling was propped up against the headboard of his bed, while his sister sat at his bedside in the desk chair. At this moment in time, nothing in the world mattered to them except each other. Hands intertwined, brother and sister had their lips interlocked as they shared their first mutual kiss. Deep inside both parties, it awoke the most wonderful of feelings and conveyed a level of love and devotion that neither had thought possible.

For Kari, this was the realisation of a two-year fantasy, her wildest daydream made real… something that before tonight, she had considered impossible. Nevertheless, here she was. Experiencing for the first time what it felt like to both love and be loved in return. Blissful was not adequate enough to describe how she felt in this singular moment.

Meanwhile, Tai was experiencing liberation from the weight of keeping his true feelings suppressed for the past four weeks. A release from all the pain, both physical and emotional, that he had endured to try and protect his sister. It had been a mistake to do so, he realised that now. And while he had felt some of Kari’s love and warmth the last time she had kissed him, it paled in comparison to what he was currently experiencing.

Mutually, the siblings broke off their first proper kiss. Tears ran down both of their cheeks as reddish and chocolate browns opened up to gaze into each other. Ever so slowly, they shrank away from each other, both trembling slightly at the emotional overload.

Of the pair, Kari was first to react. In an overjoyed burst of happiness, she propelled herself forward and threw her arms around her brother’s broad shoulders. It took a moment before she felt his strong arms wrap themselves around her. At present he lacked some of his usual strength, however, given the recent blood loss, that was to be expected.

“I can’t tell you how much I’ve yearned to hear you say those words over the past two years,” Kari whispered as her eyes closed once more. Drowning in the sheer bliss of being within her brothers embrace and in the knowledge that he returned her feelings.

“I think I’m beginning to feel it,” Tai replied softly. Having now spilt his secret he began to feel his whole body relax. It was as if each day since he had accepted the truth had ratcheted up the tension in every part of his body. And that the pain from his wounds had only given him the illusion of release.

For a minute or two, the siblings hugged in the sweet silence of the bedroom. When Kari eventually relinquished her grip, Tai followed suit. Settling herself back down in her chair, she then asked the first burning question, “when did you know?”

“The notion first crossed my mind the night you told me how you felt,” Tai replied truthfully, feeling no need to hide anything from his sister now. “I was thinking about our conversation and why I’d reacted the way I did. And that was the answer I came up with. As you probably know from experience, it came as quite a shock. However, by the next morning, I put it down to having been a knee jerk reaction.”

“Denial, I know the feeling all too well,” she said softly, giving him a reassuring smile. “That was exactly what I did in the aftermath of taking that magazine quiz in school.” Kari could recall with clarity just how difficult this conversation had been for her and so elected not to bombard her brother with questions unless there was something specific she wanted to know.

“Much like you, I caught myself looking at and thinking about you in way’s I shouldn’t over the next week.” Tai paused and took a breath. He looked into his sister’s warm eyes for reassurance. Even though he knew he shouldn’t need it, he still took comfort in it. For there still remained some degree of difficulty in talking about it. “Then came my date with Teiko.”

Kari reached out and gave his hand a light squeeze. “That’s when you couldn’t hide from it anymore.”

“Pretty much. When we kissed it felt good but did not compare to how it felt when you kissed me. Teiko then managed to get the truth out of me.”

“Teiko knows!” Kari said in alarm. Her hand involuntarily tensed around her brothers. Had he told the girl about her feelings for him?

It was Tai’s turn to act reassuring. He held onto his sister’s hand and looked her straight in the eyes. “She doesn’t know about how you feel,” he said and felt her relax in his grip. “She knew I was in love with someone else and got me to tell her who.”

Kari let out a slow breath and could feel her body ease. However, when she asked, “how did she react?” she still felt concern for her brother. It had been just over two years before she had been forced to tell someone. In his case, it sounded like little more than two minutes.

“Teiko’s about as liberal as you can get and is a firm believer that you can’t help who you fall in love with. She actually thought it was a shame when I said that I doubted you would feel the same way. Apparently, we’d make quite a cute couple.”

Kari let out a small giggle at that last comment. “Let me guess, she’s read a truckload of shojo manga.”

Tai laughed, “and her fair share of brother-sister romance stories.”

Thinking back to that day, specifically when she arrived home to find her brother waiting up for her, a question popped into Kari’s head that she needed to voice, “did you plan on telling me that night?”

He lowered his head upon hearing her words. He was not proud of having caused her a small measure of distress in order to get the information he wanted. Only to then not tell her the truth. “I wrestled with what to do on the way home from Teiko’s. Eventually, I decided that I needed to know whether or not you would want a relationship.”

For the first time since Tai had made his confession, Kari felt a twinge of apprehension. Like she had just found her footing and was afraid that the rug was about to be pulled out from beneath her. Was this conversation eventually going to lead to a, ‘we might be in love, but can’t be together,’ moment? She did not know if she could cope with that scenario. “That’s why you asked me those questions.”

As soon as she spoke, he knew that his sister felt worried. Worried that he would finish telling her the truth and then say that they could not be together. However, while he wished to allay her fears right here and now, the truth of the matter was that he did not know where they went from here. He nodded his head, “yes. That night, I was deeply afraid of what might happen if we tried to have a relationship. Of what it might do to you if the wrong people found out about it. For over the preceding two weeks, you had been happier than I’d seen you in a long time.” Tai looked his sister in the eyes again. “I decided that I couldn’t do anything to jeopardise your happiness and so chose to keep my feelings a secret.”

So that was the answer to burning question number two, (why he had not told her). Unfortunately, Kari did not know how she felt about that. On the one hand, she could understand his desire to protect her. Old habits die hard after all. However, that same desire of his also made her feel angry. Should she not have had some say in the matter? For this certainly was not a decision he had any right to make by himself. She was sixteen, not six! She took a breath to steady herself. Losing her temper at this point would not help matters. Instead, she needed to hear the rest of his story and find out where he stood now. “But you found keeping that secret too much of a burden to bear.”

“Yes. I couldn’t stop thinking about you to the point that it became impossible to focus on anything else. Until…”

“Until you accidentally cut yourself.”

Tai lowered his head. “The rest is exactly as I told you.” He could hear a slight stiffness in his sister’s tone that had not been there prior to him telling her why he had chosen not to tell her the truth before now. Was she mad at him for trying to protect her? When he looked up his gaze was met with an intense stare from those reddish-brown orbs.

“So what happens now?” Kari asked with a mix of trepidation, fear and anger.

Instead of answering her question, Tai said, “you’re mad at me for not telling you.”

She felt slightly caught off guard by his assertion, having not realised that she had telegraphed the fact so obviously. Well, if they were ever to have any kind of relationship she had best be honest with him, “yes, I’m mad at you. I’m mad because you gave me no say in the matter and instead chose to keep your feelings a secret. Even after I poured my heart out to you. Not to mention what you then did to yourself because of that decision.”

Tai could see his sister shake slightly as she unloaded her payload on top of him. In fairness, she had every right to be pissed off. While she had kept her feelings secret from him for over two years, at least she had the valid excuse of being afraid of how he would react. He, on the other hand, had known how she felt. And regardless of the reason why he had done it, he owed her an apology. He gave her the most sincere look he could when he said, “I’m sorry, Kari. I’m sorry I didn’t tell that night after my date with Teiko. I had no right to make a decision regarding what we did about our feelings by myself.”

She gave him a smile and a nod, “I forgive you.” Her eyes then locked onto his and in a stern voice she said, “but if you ever do something so stupid again you had better hope I never find out!”

Tai shrank away slightly under the intensity of his sister’s stare. She’d gotten this scary look business down to a fine art now. “Ok, ok, whatever you say, Sis,” he said with a hint of nerves.

Kari allowed her gaze to soften as she repeated her earlier question, “so what happens now?”

“I don’t know,” Tai replied truthfully. “You said that night, that if I had told you I was in love with you, that you would want us to have a relationship. I take it you haven’t changed your mind.”

“No,” Kari breathed. This was it. The moment where either something special could be born or her heart got ripped out. And it all rested on what opinion her brother now held on the subject or whether he would be willing to change it. “Is that what you want too?”

Tai thought for a moment before he responded. What did he actually want? He had spent all of his time trying to keep his feelings a secret and protect his sister, that he had given very little thought as to what he himself wanted. Would it be possible for both of them to suppress their feelings? It would certainly break Kari’s heart having to do so. And he had already seen what fate potentially awaited him should he try. Could they try a middle ground where they shared a forbidden moment here and there, just enough to sate themselves so they could go about their everyday lives like normal? Or was the only solution to try and have a proper relationship, despite all the hardship and adversity they might face? “I don’t know,” he eventually answered truthfully. “However, I know that trying to suppress the feelings we have for one another will not end well for either of us.”

Ok, Kari thought as she absorbed her brother’s words. That could have been a lot worse. While he was clearly not on board with the idea of a full-blown relationship yet, he at least recognised the fact that suppressing their feelings was a bad idea. She gave him a reassuring smile. Given that she had two years on him when it came to understanding how she felt, it only seemed fair that she take the lead on this situation. “We don’t have to rush into anything if you’re not comfortable. You only came to accept how you feel two weeks ago. That’s barely any time at all to process something this huge. I’m more than happy to wait until you’re ready.”

A small laugh escaped from Tai’s lips. “You know it’s funny. Right now, half of me is terrified of what might happen to us if we pursue this and wants to try and put the genie back into the bottle. And the other want’s to have you in every way that I can and never give you up.”

“It drives you crazy, doesn’t it?” Kari replied with a chuckle. “Try feeling like that every time we see each other for two years.”

“Just a little. How did you manage to survive all that time without going insane?”

Kari let out a maniacal giggle. “I’m not entirely sure my sanity did survive.” She then indicated her current appearance. “I mean, look at me. The person I was two years ago didn’t exactly make it through alive, did she?”

“I guess not,” Tai conceded, then asked, “so what do we do?” Sensing that Kari had indeed put some thought into this over the past two years.

Kari reached out, took hold of her brother's right arm and turned it so she could inspect the bandage. Having temporarily forgotten that she needed to keep checking it. No blood, good. By now the wound should hopefully have clotted. “I think we’re going to avoid that trip to the emergency room,” she said as she exhaled in relief.

Thinking about it now, Tai felt overwhelmingly grateful to his sister. The idea of having to undergo a psych evaluation and his parents finding out was too much to even bear thinking about. His mind stopped in its tracks and he turned to look at Kari. “You aren’t going to tell mom and dad, are you?” he asked, sounding slightly fearful.

She looked at him with disdain. “Of course. And then I’m going to tell them that we’re in love with each other…” she gave him a punch in the arm, “…don’t be thick!”

“Hey, it was a genuine concern,” he exclaimed, though internally felt relieved. Tai then reiterated his previous question, “so what do we do?”

“Whatever you’re comfortable with,” Kari replied and then stood up. She then indicated with her had for him to move, “budge over.”

He gave her a quizzical look but did as she suggested. Rolling onto his side he shifted over so that his back pressed against the wall. His sister then climbed onto his bed and lay down beside him. Only when he felt the warmth radiate from her body did he realise that he was cold.

Kari stared into her brother’s eyes and ran a hand over his torso; it felt cold to the touch. Reaching down to the bottom of the bed, she pulled the blanket over them. “Does any of this feel uncomfortable?” she asked, wrapping her arm and the blanket around his shoulders.

Tai responded by placing his right hand over the small of her back and pulled her closer to him, “no.”

Their bodies pressed together, faces inches apart. Chocolate eyes met reddish-brown’s as their lips came together once more. Neither of them knew exactly what this was the beginning of, but they both knew this, it was definitely the beginning of something.


	29. Pt3 02) Breaking water

**Part Three: Their Secret**

**Chapter Two: Breaking water**

The persistent beep-beep noise of an alarm clock was enough to rouse Kari Kamiya from her slumber. Haphazardly, she poked a hand out from under the blanket in its direction and succeeded in batting it into silence on the third attempt. That was enough of that she thought firmly as she retracted her arm. For a moment she lay content in the stillness of the room and was about to snuggle down for a long lie when she felt a breath of warm air hit her face. Her eyes opened to discover the face of her brother inches from her own. As her other senses kicked in, she became aware that she still wore last night’s Digital Punk outfit. The memories of everything that had happened the previous evening flooded back to her and she could not help but smile. Inconceivable as it might be, the impossible had occurred last night, Tai had confessed his love for her.

Kari’s eyes drank in the sight of her still sleeping, tousled haired brother. He looked so cute she just wanted to pull him into a hug and never let go. And it seemed that was exactly what had happened last night. For she could recall lying down on the bed beside him and that they had huddled together under the blanket. A small chuckle escaped her lips as she caught sight of the smearings of black lipstick on her brother’s. They had shared several kisses before sleep had apparently taken them she recalled. Rubbing a hand from Tai’s right shoulder and down his arm, she encountered the bandage she had applied to his wound. Even in the dim light under the blanket, she could tell that it remained blood-free on the surface level. Later that day it would require re-dressing and she would be able to have a proper look at it then. For now she remained content that her brother had dodged the emergency room bullet. Perhaps fate, for once, had interceded in her favour. As she had been almost certain that it would have been an inevitability. And if that had happened, she may never have gotten him to admit his true feelings for her.

From beside her, Tai began to stir. Kari watched as, still asleep, he tried to roll away from her. Thump! She cringed on hearing his face hit the wall.

“Oww!” he exclaimed in a sleepy voice that indicated he could not work out what had just happened; too cute.

“Tai,” Kari giggled.

Her brother struggled to turn around to face her, “huh?” His hair now covered his eyes, impairing his vision.

“Wakey, wakey, sleepyhead,” she said as she reached out to move the clumps of hair from in front of his eyes.

“Kari!” Tai exclaimed as he jerked backwards, this time hitting the back of his head against the wall.

She gave him a smile, “in the flesh.”

Behind his bloodshot chocolate eyes, she could see her brother’s brain trying to access long term memory and retrieve the appropriate data. She laughed internally when her own suggested she go and get one of the manga from his bookshelves to read while she waited for him to remember; he was totally still running windows 98 up there. After a few more moments, he glanced down at his right arm and then back at her.

“Still here,” Kari said in amusement.

“Did we fall asleep like this?” he asked, indicating that he was not yet firing on all thrusters.

The temptation to say, _“no. I went to bed and when I woke up this morning I decided to get dressed and hop back in for a morning snuggle,” _was almost too much for Kari. However, given that the ability to understanding wit would not come online until after he had eaten breakfast, she elected to go with, “looks like it.”

He gave her a small smirk, “I really screwed up last night, didn’t I?”

“You did,” she agreed, “but luckily I arrived in time to patch you up and then beat the truth out of you.”

Tai looked into her eyes as he said, “I guess I owe you this, then,” before reaching out for her lips with his own.

Kari felt her brother’s dry lips make contact with her own, yet it still felt heavenly. Passionately she returned the soft kiss. Any fears she may have had that he would try and shirk back into his shell today quickly dispelled. When contact was eventually broken, she had to take a breath to bring her down from cloud nine and back to earth. “If you do that again, I’m going to want you to do that every morning.”

Tai grinned, “when am I ever going to be awake before you to do so?”

She responded by giving him a playful pout, “hmph.”

“On the flip side, you could always use it to get me out of bed when I inevitably sleep in.”

A devilish grin danced on her lips, “don’t tempt me.”

They shared another short kiss before Tai asked her, “what time is it?”

“Just after half seven, I think. Your alarm clock went off a few minutes ago and I suspect you never set it to weekend time yesterday.”

“Urgh,” Tai exclaimed as his eyes shut and he tried to roll onto his back.

She couldn’t help but smile. It seemed her brother really was allergic to mornings. “Tell you what. Why don’t I get up, go shower and then make us some breakfast? While you have an extra twenty minutes. Sound fair?”

He opened his eyes but groaned again. “I think I need an extra hour.”

“Half an hour,” Kari stated as she fixed him with a no-nonsense look, “or I’ll delve into the freezer and find something of mom’s to serve you.”

“Half an hour it is,” he gulped; his features having paled slightly at the suggestion.

She gave him a quick peck on the lips before climbing out of his bed. When she reached the door, she called back, “and before you ponder whether or not to take a chance, remember you still have to eat for the rest of the weekend.” She left the room to the sound of a loud groan.

Kari made her way to the bathroom, where a quick look in the mirror caused her to burst out laughing. Her makeup had smudged horribly from the tears she had shed last night and her black lipstick looked patchier than a tinkers coat. All in all, coupled with her pale skin, it gave her the appearance of a zombie whose head was on fire. Lucky for her, like pretty much every other part of her brother, Tai’s eyes never worked properly until after he had eaten breakfast. She undressed quickly and hopped in the shower before it had properly heated up; causing her to let out a small yelp. Making sure to thoroughly scrub her face, Kari washed quickly.

When she eventually made it to her bedroom, she pulled on her orange anarchy t-shirt and a pair of blue three-quarter-length jeans. Being a pair that her mom had bought for her, there was nothing interesting about them bar the basic rips she had put in the knees. Hopefully, once her mother eventually figured out what she was doing to the clothes she had been bought, she would take the hint and allow her to buy everything herself. Reaching under her bed, she pulled out her CD box and plucked out Hergest Ridge; something light. While she had an itching to listen to Amarok, putting that particular album on would probably send Tai running back into his room to hide, given that he had barely passed his initiate phase. So that would have to wait until some point later in the day when she could put her headphones on.

Leaving her bedroom, Kari made a stop in the living area to pop on her album, before heading into the kitchen; keeping the volume low enough that it wouldn’t travel to her brother’s bedroom. The delicate opening notes of the first composition bathed over her as she started cracking eggs into a bowl. She added milk, butter and seasoning before giving it a thorough whisk and tipping it into a pot. Putting some bread on to toast and a pot of coffee to boil, she began scrambling the eggs. By the time she had started plating up, the flat footfalls of her brother could be heard from down the hallway, followed by the sound of…

“Urgh, close the door in future, Tai!” she exclaimed as she picked up the plates and brought them over to the table. They were soon joined by two glasses of orange juice and two mugs of coffee; she’d had a rough night too.

Sitting down, Kari waited for him to join her before starting her breakfast. As though guided more by his nose than eyes, Tai staggered down the hallway and plonked himself down opposite her. Without saying a word, he began attacking his food. She giggled to herself and shook her head. How could anyone revert to that level of asleep after only half an hour? They ate, with only the sound of the music to be heard. Although she suspected that her brother only noticed something was playing after he’d drank his first mug of coffee.

Finishing her last mouthful, Kari looked up at Tai, “so, what shall we do today?”

He looked at her over the rim of his mug, “I think we should talk,” he said in a serious voice.

So much for a light-hearted morning, she thought as she met his gaze. “What about exactly?” she asked, trying to hide the concern in her tone. Surely he was not about to turn around and tell her that last night had been a mistake?

She felt an icy hand of fear begin to wrap itself around her heart when he replied, “about us.” It must have shown on her face as he quickly added, “about what we should and shouldn’t do.”

Kari let out an audible exhale of relief. It seemed that her mind was still expecting her reality to turn out to be nothing more than an elaborate fantasy. “Ok,” she said, slightly more tentatively than she would have liked, “I suppose that would be a good idea. Mom and dad aren’t exactly brother-sister shojo manga fans.”

Tai nodded his head, “that’s probably an understatement. If they catch us doing anything inappropriate we’ll probably wish we were facing the Dark Masters again.”

“Don’t refer to it like that,” she uttered coldly. “I don’t care what anyone else thinks, nothing we do should be referred to as inappropriate. However, you are right. We can’t do anything around them that will arouse suspicion.”

“Agreed. It would probably be for the best if we act normal in the house while either of them is home.”

Kari sighed but nodded in reply. Maintaining secrecy would probably need to be the number one priority for any sort of relationship that they might have. “We’re going to have to make sure that we know roughly when they’ll both be home so we know when it’s going to be safe to be ourselves.”

“It also goes without saying that we can’t tell anyone. Even if they don’t have an issue with it themselves, we can’t run the risk that they’ll tell someone that will.”

That one went without saying, however, it made her ask, “what about Teiko, she already knows half of the truth?”

Tai took a sip from his mug before saying, “I’d trust Teiko with my life and if there was one person I would ever tell, it would be her. But I’m not sure that’s a good idea. Regardless of how cute she thinks we would be.”

“Guess I’ll just have to act natural next time I see her,” Kari replied. While she wished she could share her love for him with the world, Tai was probably right on that matter.

“Besides, her tongue can get a little loose when she gets drunk. Although it’s not likely she’ll ever be drinking in the company of anyone we know.”

“I take it you’ll be more comfortable if we still act normal out with the house for now?” she then asked after a mouthful of orange juice.

Tai took a moment to think before answering, “I think so. I know I’m not offering you much, but I’m still trying to get a handle on all of this. You still have two years on me, remember.”

“I understand,” Kari nodded. “I’ll wait as long as you need me to. However, if/when that time comes, we should probably be careful about where we frequent. Too many people in Odaiba might recognise us.”

“Good thing we’ll have the rest of Tokyo to play with,” Tai said with a laugh.

She joined in and added, “if we lived in a small town it would be impossible. Once one person saw us doing something naughty, it’d reach home before we could.”

He gave her a smile, “I suppose that just leave one question.”

“Which is?”

“What do you want to do today?”

Kari pondered this for a moment, before asking, “how much school work do you have to do?” While she wanted nothing more than to spend the whole weekend with him, like they had done the last time their parents had been away, it would not be fair if she monopolised his attention when he had work he needed to do.

“Honestly, I don’t know,” Tai replied with a weak grin. “Most of yesterday is a blur before…” he raised a hand to rub his left cheek, “…you slapped me!”

She gave him a serious look, “it was to keep you conscious. However, you’re lucky I didn’t slap you again for being so stupid.”

Tai lowered his head and she could see his eyes shifting to the bandage around his right forearm. He sighed, “I guess I owe you more than that kiss.”

Kari shot him a wicked grin. “Think of it this way. As long as that remains our little secret, you belong to me.”

“You’re claiming ownership over me?” he asked warily.

Kari’s reddish-brown eyes met his chocolate ones and she tilted her head slightly as she replied in a calm yet authoritative voice, “pretty much. So no kissing other girls for you.”

Tai shrugged his shoulders and let out a hollow laugh. “Don’t worry, I don’t intend to go out with anyone else. I’ve had my fill of crappy relationships,” he looked at her pointedly, “and I’ve seen what happens when you become trapped in one that you’re not committed to.”

For a split second, her mind wandered to TK and how she much she had hurt him. She felt the obligatory pang of guilt before wrenching herself back to the here and now. “I guess that’ll be no boyfriends or girlfriends for either of us. Let’s hope mom and dad continue to think it’s because we’re being mature adults and putting our studies first.”

He let out a chuckle. “With all the changes to your appearance, I bet mom will be dreading what sort of boy you might date. So I think she’ll be happy if you remain single.”

Kari burst out laughing at the thought of the sort of boy’s Tai was referring to. “I guess she should be thankful that my taste in boys is very particular.”

“I’m beginning to think my taste in girls is becoming equally picky,” Tai replied before grinning. “Although I’m willing to bet she’d approve of my tastes over yours. I hear that guy you like is a bad influence.”

Even though his comments had a serious undertone they both burst out laughing. However, the ‘bet’ comment had reminded Kari of something. “If you don’t have too much work to do, let’s go into town and pay a visit to Iowa’s. You still owe me a CD from the Teiko bet.”

Tai looked at her blankly for a moment before recollection set in. He rolled his eyes. “Fine, let me go check my planner and if I’m not facing a Giga Cannon’s worth of homework, we’ll go. But remind me not to make any more wagers with you.”

Kari smiled innocently at him, “why would I need to do that? Surely you’re not scared of a friendly bet with little old me?”

“Because behind that cute, innocent exterior lies a very clever and devious mind.”

She gave him the devilish grin. “Don’t forget a crack shot with a green turtle shell.”

Tai stared directly into her eyes with his game face on. “I swear that if it’s the last thing I do, I am going to kick your sassy butt at Mario Kart.”

“Care to make a wager on that?”

She laughed internally when she saw Tai grit his teeth. It had been far too easy to bait him. Hands firmly planted on the table, her brother rose from his chair. “I’m away to check my school planner and if my workload isn’t going to bury me, you, little sister, are going down this weekend.”

“Maybe I’ll go pick out what other CD’s you’re going to buy me when you fail miserably,” she replied as she watched him stalk off to his bedroom.

There would be no need for her to actually make good on her threat, for she had already researched which albums from both Mike Oldfield and Pink Floyd she wanted next. Instead, she stood up and cleared away the breakfast dishes. By the time Tai returned, she had already started washing them.

“Ok, so given how much work I need to do, I can either do half of it tonight and the other half tomorrow or take today off and spend all of tomorrow working.”

“Let’s go into town today and have lunch somewhere,” Kari replied after a moment’s thought. “Then when we get back, we can both study and you can get your backside stuffed with green turtle shells during break times. Just like we did a couple of weeks ago.”

“Sounds good, except you’ll find my backside will be well protected with banana skins.” He gave her a steely look of determination. “You’re not going to beat me this time, Sister.”

Kari finished washing the last mug, sat it neatly on the draining board and then walked slowly to stand in front of him. “Bring it on, Brother,” she said as she locked onto his gaze. They stared at each other for a moment and she could see in his eyes a sparkle of hunger reminiscent of the one she herself felt upon losing herself in the beauty of those chocolate brown orbs. Wrapping an arm around his neck she reached up and planted a gentle kiss on his lips. However, when her nose wrinkled, she quickly said, “you seriously need a shower, Tai.”

Dethatching herself from him, she watched as he smelled his own armpit, laughing when his face almost turned green. “I think you might just be right on that one, Sis,” he said before holding up his right arm, “but what about this?”

She pondered for a moment before deciding, “let’s have a look at it first.”

They both sat back down at the table and Tai held his arm out towards her. Carefully, Kari peeled away the tape and unwound the bandage. It seemed that by doubling up on the gauze and wrapping the bandage tight, she had successfully got the blood to clot and the wound to seal. However, she could not help but feel partly responsible for the collection of six scabs at varying stages of healing that his wrist also bore.

“This one will almost certainly scar,” she said, pointing to last night’s cut, “however, if you’re lucky, the others won’t leave anything noticeable.”

She watched him study his arm for a moment before he said, “so long as no more than two leave a discernible scar, I doubt anyone will be able to tell what they are. If not, I’ll need to get a wristband or something.”

“We’ll cross that bridge if we need to once they’ve fully healed,” Kari replied with a reassuring smile. “In the meantime, it’s probably not a good idea for you to get it wet.” She pondered for a second, then added, “wait here,” before standing up and making her way to the kitchen. Rummaging in a drawer she removed a roll of plastic kitchen film.

When she came back, Tai gave her a look that suggested he found her idea ingenious, “you’re going to wrap it in film like they do with tattoos.”

“Exactly,” she said as she placed the film over his wrist and quickly wrapped it around enough times to make it watertight. “I’d still advise keeping it as dry as possible. The heat from the water might make it sting like hell.”

“I’ll be careful,” Tai said with a nod of his head as he stood up and headed for the bathroom.

Half an hour later, while sitting on the sofa enjoying the second half of Crises, Kari heard her brother return to the main living area. Turning her head, she was pleasantly surprised that he had chosen to wear the black jeans she had customised for him, along with the red and black shirt she had paired them with. Unsurprisingly he had added a long-sleeved black top underneath it.

“Dressing to impress,” she said sagely as she smiled at him. “I’ve taught you well.”

“I did say they might grow on me.”

“Your arm,” she then said as she stood up from the sofa.

Tai rolled up the sleeve of his top and indicated the fresh bandage he had put over it. “Already taken care of.”

Kari crossed the distance between them and inspected his handiwork carefully. “Did you clean it with antiseptic?” she asked firmly.

He nodded, “of course. Are you ready to go?”

“I just need to grab my jacket.”

Heading for the front door, Kari retrieved her short denim jacket from where she had discarded it the previous night; her phone and purse were still in the pockets. Pulling on last night’s black and neon yellow converse, she smiled when Tai opted for his black boots over his trainers. She really had taught him something. Opening the front door, the siblings stepped out to enjoy a mild autumn Odaiba day.


	30. Pt3 03) Short and sweet

**Part Three: Their Secret**

**Chapter Three: Short and sweet**

The hour was growing late and it was dark inside the Kamiya apartment. Alone for the weekend, the two siblings were to be found on the sofa watching the end of Akira; Kari’s pick this time. They had turned all the other lights of and so the TV provided the main living area’s only illumination.

Tai sat with his back turned into the far right-hand corner of the sofa, a soft cushion behind him and his feet resting on the edge of the table. His sister lay with her feet up and her head resting against his chest, her left arm wrapped around his torso. He had offered up no resistance when Kari had shifted herself to sit like this. While a small part of his brain still tried to tell him that it was wrong, the overwhelming majority loved how right this felt. To have her this close to him was all so natural he never wanted to go back to a time when they sat with so much distance between them. His left hand hung down over her slender waist and pressed lightly against her stomach. Every so often he would feel the underwire of her bra come into contact with his thumb as he absentmindedly caressed her. A boundary that, though he greatly desired to cross it, he treated with the utmost of respect. Kari had given him no indication that she was open to such levels of contact and he had no intention of ever pushing her in a direction that she was not comfortable with. While she may have had two years on him in terms of coming to terms with her incestuous feelings, he had two and a half years’ worth of extra life experience. In his mind, this weekend would be about figuring out what both of them were comfortable with, not just him.

Earlier that day, they had gone into town and he had honoured his wager from four weeks ago and bought her a copy of Pink Floyd’s The Dark Side of the Moon. And like a re-run of the last time they had gone shopping, Kari had taken him into h.NAOTO. Only this time she had kept a firm hand on him as she wandered around the store. It had been unfortunate for him that they had been standing in front of a display of chokers and collars when he had protested. For her devilish grin had spread across her face and she had threatened to buy one, buckle it around his neck and then lead him around the store on a leash. His face had turned bright red at this suggestion and part of him had wondered just how serious she had been. He’d made no further protest after that and simply observed while Kari eyed up a pair of black leggings with crisscrossed ribbon down each side, a brown leather steam-punk corset…thing and a short black leather jacket, amongst several other things. In the end, while he suspected that had she the funds she would have bought the lot, she’d had to settle for just the leggings today. Afterwards, they had wandered around a few other stores and he had started the search for new football boots that would still be several weeks’ worth of allowance away. They’d gone to a soba bar for lunch and then spent a fun afternoon in the arcade before taking a trip to the grocery store.

When they had arrived home, he’d decided to start his homework while Kari prepared dinner. At no point did he have any problem concentrating. After another flawless meal, consisting of sushi rolls, chicken katsu and Churros, they had both been blown away by Pink Floyd’s The Dark Side of the Moon, before returning to the dinner table to study. Break times had seen his losing streak at Mario Kart extended to four matches (discounting the one they had not finished). However, the slim margin of the defeats only made him more determined to beat her by the end of the weekend. Kari, on the other hand, had threatened to implement a wager of one CD every time he wished to try his luck from this point on. Stating that she should at least get something for giving him the pleasure of having his butt stuffed with green turtle shells. She was so going down! Once he had made significant headway with his homework, they had decided to settle down on the sofa and watch the film before heading to bed.

The ending scene of Akira drew to a close and Tai looked down at his sister. Even in the darkness, he could see the serene look of contentment on her face. The happiness she radiated so strong that it mixed with his own in some sort of metaphysical bubble that enveloped them both. Her eyes shifted from the screen to meet his own. Neither of them moved yet their gazes danced together like two flames inside a heart ablaze with passion.

“I love you,” he whispered softly, realising that he had never uttered those words to anyone else before. Not one of the short-lived girlfriends that had come and gone since Sora had rejected him nor even the redhead herself had ever elicited a shred of the feelings he felt towards Kari in this moment. He didn’t care whether or not society would consider it wrong, taboo or whatever else they would label it. Teiko was right, you couldn’t help who you fell in love with. And this was just that, love.

“I love you too,” Kari replied, her voice delicate and pure.

She raised her head up off his chest and he lowered his own. Their lips met and the passions within them ignited like wine splashed over a hot wok. Except, in their case, a continuous supply of fuel was fed to keep the flames alight. His sister’s arms wrapped themselves around Tai’s shoulders as her soft lips, which tasted like acacia honey, intertwined with his own. He felt her tongue gently start to tease at them as kisses started stringing together like notes in a musical symphony; or to satisfy Kari, a Mike Oldfield composition. Without resistance, he allowed her passage into his mouth when finally she pressed slightly more. A shiver, though not an unpleasant one, ran down his spine when he felt her adventurous tongue run over his own and explore his mouth.

On the outside, Tai felt one of his sister’s hands slide its way up his neck, into his hair and rest around the back of his head. His own hands reached out and pulled her closer to him. Kari worked with him and together they shifted her so that she now sat in his lap; his legs leaving their perch on the table. Lovingly, he started to rub her back on top of her t-shirt, again mindful that she had not consented to hands under clothing.

Back up top, Tai took the invitation from her retreating tongue to follow it back into its garden. He moved beyond her rows of small, perfectly straight white teeth and started to explore the inside of Eden. However, his time was cut short when he felt Kari start to push him back. Even though he could not see her lips, he knew that her devilish smile had formed on them. Like sabres, their tongues duelled, pushing each other back and forth across the centre line where their lips joined. The joust lasted for several minutes before both had to break for a proper breath. While he had no way of telling how turned on his sister was right now, for Tai, the proof bulged between their groins. Panting, both siblings withdrew slightly, though Kari retained her grip on the back of his head.

“You’ve got me all hot and bothered, Tai Kamiya,” his sister managed to say through laboured breaths.

“You gave me quite a work out too,” he uttered amid his own struggles for air.

He could feel the beads of warm sweat run down his own neck and in the dull light see a sheen across her forehead beneath her orange hair. When she managed to steady her breathing, her expression took on a more serious appearance. “Is this too much too soon?” she asked, sounding concerned.

Tai snaked his hand up the back of her sticky orange t-shirt and placed it around the back of her head. Gently he pulled her back towards him and planted a tender kiss on her lips. “No,” he replied softly when they broke contact. “I can’t describe how right this feels.”

“You don’t have to,” Kari said before responding in kind.

They set off again at a relaxed pace, taking time to relish in each and every heartfelt moment. Their bodies pressed together so intimately that Tai could feel her small breasts squashed against his muscular torso. And he did not doubt that his sister would be able to feel the bulge in his pants pressing against her crotch. They continued for several more minutes, the tempo slowly increasing and their tongues once more engaging in an elegant dance, like a couple gliding over a ballroom floor. When Kari next pushed him back across the centre line, he felt her deftly withdraw before her teeth take hold of his bottom lip and give him an affectionate nibble. When she released him, her lips travelled across the left-hand side of his face and down his neck in a series of delicate kisses. A light moan escaped from his mouth as her hands rubbed his chest atop his t-shirt and her tongue started to move in small circles. This was followed by some intense sucking and eventually the feeling of her teeth dragging lightly over his skin.

If ever Tai had been stuck in a heaven and hell situation, this was it. Heaven, because he loved every second of what his sister was doing; piled atop everything they had just done. But also hell, for he felt an almost overwhelming urge to go and masturbate. Indeed, if it were not for the fact that he had never made it beyond second base, he would probably want nothing more than to lie Kari down on the sofa and fuck her. As it were, he had far too much self-control. However, that did not make the need to orgasm just vanish. It had been weeks since he had last played with himself and if his sister kept going in her current direction, he might end up popping inside his jeans.

Tai felt Kari’s warm breath on his neck as she took one last long taste of his skin and brought her lips up to his ear. Her teeth lightly caressed his lobe for a moment before she whispered, “I think we’d best stop here. Otherwise, I don’t think I’ll be able to control myself.”

He nodded his head in agreement, but said, “don’t I get to play with you a bit more?”

A heartbeat of amused laughter filled her next breath, “if you do that, then I really won’t be able to control myself.” She pulled her head away so he could now look into her eyes. “And, judging by the bulge and heat I can feel coming from your groin, you won’t be able to either.”

“It would be too far, too soon,” he agreed, feeling both relieved and disappointed simultaneously.

Kari gave him a sweet smile. “Next time, promise,” she said before giving him a peck on the lips. She then slid her left cheek past his own and whispered in his ear, “I’ll maybe even let those itchy fingers of yours underneath my t-shirt.” He felt a brief stab of pain as she proceeded to bite his earlobe.

“What was that for?” he asked indignantly, slightly surprised by the sudden sharp feeling of her teeth chomping at his flesh.

“You’re an attractive boy, Tai Kamiya. I need to mark my territory,” she answered as she looked him in the eyes again.

“I thought we already discussed not kissing other people?”

“We did,” she gave him a wicked grin, “but that won’t stop them trying to kiss you.”

Tai gave her a pout that stated that this was clearly not fair but succeeded only in causing her to laugh. His sister gave him one last peck on the lips and then climbed out of his lap. “I think it’s time for bed,” she breathed as she straightened up.

He couldn’t agree more. Letting out a laboured breath he could feel his heart racing inside his chest and that blood still pumped vigorously in his lower extremity. Once safely within the walls of his bedroom, he was going to jack-off like he’d never jacked-off before. And he knew exactly what flaming haired vixen would be at the forefront of his mind when he did.


	31. Pt3 03) Ummagumma

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning! This chapter contains content of an explicit sexual nature. In that regard, if you find such material uncomfortable to read, I suggest that you skip ahead to the next chapter now. For those of you that elect to stay and are curious, the title of this chapter is taken from that of Pink Floyd’s fourth album. Not only was the term, Ummagumma, slang for sex in Cambridge in the late 1960s, but like the album from which its name is derived, this chapter should be viewed as a bit of an experiment. I came up with the idea and, for lack of a better term, just ran with it. In the end, I am actually quite pleased with how it turned out. So, without further delay from me, enjoy.

**Part Three: Their Secret**

**Chapter Four: Ummagumma**

Stray beams of moonlight crept along the floor and up over the bumpy sheets that covered Kari Kamiya’s bed. The bearer of light lay on her back beneath them, her knees raised and split, like the twin peaks of two mountains separated by a deep valley. Her pale blue pyjama trousers were bunched around her ankles and the matching jacket wide open to reveal the small mounds that were her breasts. Her eyes were closed and her mind focused on the image of her brother. His every metaphorical action mirrored by a touch from her own hands. A moan escaped from her lips as Tai lightly ran his index fingers in slow circles around her stiffening nipples. She gasped when thumbs and forefingers gently squeezed. In a firm grip, he took her breasts in his hands and began to knead them, like they were balls of dough. Her heart rate increased in tandem with his tempo and she could feel her breathing become more rapid. Ecstasy flooded through Kari and she arched her back as she let out an elongated moan. This attention to her breasts was almost too much to bear.

##

Across the hallway, inside his own bedroom, Tai lay beneath the covers of his own bed. After he had said goodnight to the physical incarnation of his sister, he had gone straight to his room, shut the door and stripped of his clothing. It had been a relief to finally be able to free his throbbing penis from the confines of his boxers and jeans. From his bottom desk drawer, he’d found a condom, ripped it open and used it to sheath his shaft. He intended to enjoy every moment of this and did not want to constrain himself with thoughts about making a mess.

Images of a naked Kari, her blazing hair glistening in an imaginary light filled his mind and for the first time, he welcomed her with open arms. Wrapping them around her slender frame he could feel the warmth between them. His entire body ached and he moaned softly at the contact between their bare skin. Using his own hand, he mimicked her strokes as she gently caressed his penis. A grin spread across his sister’s face as she slithered down his body, extended her tongue and flicked one of his nipples with it. His free hand carried out her action and he groaned, “mmph.”

##

Nipples hard like pinecones, Kari writhed under her sheets as her fingers pinched at them. Inside her head, Tai had slid downwards, taken one between his lips and sucked hard. She’d silently screamed in delight, her self-control hanging by a precarious thread. In an ironic twist of fate, the only danger was that Tai would hear her and give in to his own desires and turn fantasy into reality. While lust and libido would doubtlessly love every second of it, sense and psyche would probably have trouble processing it in the aftermath. It was one thing to allow your imagination to run wild, but something completely different to actually do it. And while she may be in love with Tai, Kari knew she was not ready to expose herself to him, or anyone for that matter. That aside, it did not stop her enjoying the creations of her own perverted mind.

After giving both breasts a thorough oral workout, her brother reached out and took both nipples between thumbs and forefingers. He twisted and teased, sending shockwaves up Kari’s spine, as his tongue snaked its way between her cleavage, down her abdomen and towards her naval. He stopped briefly to plant some gentle kisses before continuing on his way south. A fingertip was the closest approximation she had as she traced a path through her neat pubic hair. A light touch told her that the night's ordeal had left her soaking. Inside her head, her brother’s tongue flicked her clit at the same time her finger made contact.

##

Inside Tai’s mind, all he could see was the bright orange of Kari’s hair as he gazed down at her. One hand rubbed at his right nipple, while the left was tormented and teased by her teeth and tongue. A moan, far louder than he would have liked, escaped from his lips when his right-hand copied hers and tightened around his throbbing penis. Up and down he stroked in an even rhythm like he was stoking the embers of a fire, waiting for his sister’s actions to allow him to ignite the furnace.

Kari’s tongue circled his nipple one last time and then traced a path down his chest that caused him to tense. She lifted her head so he could gaze into those perfect reddish-brown orbs as she paused. The devilish grin spread across her face before she extended her tongue once more and licked the tip of his penis. In slow, deliberate movements, she circled around the head before running down the shaft to his balls. A series of gentle kisses were planted on each before she zig-zagged her way back to the summit. Lips puckered, Kari kissed the head of his penis with an exaggerated smooch, before opening just enough to allow him inside.

##

“Urgh,” she exclaimed, as her brother lapped up her clitoris. Wave upon wave of pleasure crashed down upon Kari, showering her with an ecstasy that was truly divine. Each flick of his tongue was like a splash of red wine being added to the hot wok that was her sexual desire. The instant it hit the metaphorical metal, it erupted into a burst blue and orange flames. While in reality, it may just have been her own finger, it transpired that a saying she had once come across on the internet was indeed true; when it came to sex, the brain was king.

Imaginary Tai then moved lower. With ease, he slipped his tongue inside her opening and licked the upper region of her vagina; just managing to catch her g-spot. If there was a heaven beyond this, it could wait Kari thought as she swirled her finger around the outside of her vagina. The pleasure ramped up another notch. Her brother then raised his head, a droplet of her sweet nectar on his lips. He gave her a grin and shifted himself into position. Pressing her fingers over her entire area to simulate the feeling of her brothers erect penis rubbing up and down in her juices, Kari prepared herself for entry.

##

“Uhhh…” Tai called out as his metaphorical little sister bobbed her head up and down his long shaft. The urge to pop then and there almost overrode his self-control as he felt his pleasure ratchet up with each and every movement of her soft lips around his penis. When she lifted her head, his hand came loose. Licking her lips of his pre-cum she gave him a devilish smile and he knew what she wanted.

Slithering up his body, Kari rubbed her wet vagina against his erect penis. Arching her back, she brought herself upright so that she hovered above it. His body ached with the need for release, but like a champagne bottle that had been stripped of its foil and had the wire cage removed, he needed to wait until it was shaken before the cork could pop and the contents pour forth.

Taking his throbbing shaft in hand, Tai readied himself.

##

Tai and Kari’s hips moved together and he slipped inside her, eliciting a cry of pleasure from both parties. Pressing further together, Tai moved deeper inside his sister, rubbing against her G-spot. Instinctively, both parties started thrusting. In sheer unadulterated ecstasy, the siblings felt pleasure wrack their bodies like it were strife in a cloud. With the results being no less electrifying.

“Mhhh, harder…”

“Ohhh, faster…”

They picked up the pace as Tai’s penis reached as deep into Kari’s vagina as it would go. With each and every thrust, their hips crashed together and separated in perfect harmony. Pleasure rolling of them both like drops of water off an awning. For the two siblings, nothing mattered except for the existence of them both in this moment. 

“Argh!” Kari moaned out loud as the sensation of sheer bliss reached its zenith and threatened to tip her over the edge into orgasmic heaven.

“Urgh!” Tai cried out as the pressure in his penis reached a point that he could no longer contain.

“Tai!”

“Kari!”

The explosion that occurred in both siblings genitalia sent them soaring into a land of pure divine bliss. The feelings of release and pleasure so strong they overpowered all other thoughts.

In their respective bedrooms, Tai and Kari lay amidst their bedsheets, their limbs floppy and expressions of pure serenity plastered across their faces. That had been exactly what they had both needed.


	32. Pt3 05) Welcome to the machine

**Part Three: Their Secret**

**Chapter Five: Welcome to the machine**

Thump, thump… thump, thump… thump, thump… Silence. Kari Kamiya let out a slow exhale and then opened her eyes. After hearing it for the first time yesterday, she had listened to The Dark Side of the Moon twice today; this being the second time. While very different from Wish You Were Here in terms of style, it still gripped her long after the final heartbeat had faded. Needless to say, it would be receiving several more plays over the coming days. She turned to look at her brother. Tai still had his eyes closed and his chest slowly rose up and down. The memory of them Frenching on this very sofa last night stirred in her mind. Even now she found it difficult to comprehend that he returned her feelings. However, the evidence was incontrovertible now and the knowledge made her feel warm and content like she was held within his embrace. The world would not see it that way, by and large they would call it wrong, sinful… degenerate. And if she did manage to convince him to give a proper relationship a chance, she knew it would be problematic. They would have to hide it from virtually all their friends, go on dates well away from Odaiba and above all, ensure that their parents never found out. However, if it meant that she could be with Tai, Kari felt prepared to make that sacrifice.

Her brother’s eyes opened and he turned to stare into her own. “What do you think that last line means?” he then asked.

Kari gave him a smile, “everything under the sun is in tune, but the sun is eclipsed by the moon.”

“I know what he said,” Tai replied. He gave her a suspicious look, “are you suggesting my English isn’t good enough to understand the words?”

She burst out laughing, “me, suggest a sporty guy like you doesn’t pay attention in his academic classes? You wound me, Brother.”

Tai scowled at her, “if you’re so smart, what do they mean by it then?”

She thought for a moment before answering, “maybe it’s the idea that everything that should matter in life could be alright, but we all ignore it in pursuit of our own selfish goals.”

“Sounds rather depressing if you ask me,” Tai said with a sigh, “but I can see the truth in it. People do seem to have a tendency to ignore what’s important in favour of getting what they want.”

“I suppose it all comes down to what we each consider to be important. No one has the right to tell someone else what to value.” Kari reached out an laid a hand on top of his. “Take me, for example, the most important thing to me is you.”

Tai met her gaze and the pair stared deeply into each other’s eyes. “It really would be a case of us and them,” he said grimly. “Even something as simple as this,” he indicated their hands, “could be misconstrued if the wrong person saw it.”

Kari could almost feel the mix of emotions radiating from her brother. A cocktail of longing, fear, desire and worry that she knew all too well from her own struggles. She reached a hand up and touched his cheek, desperately trying to convey a sense of calm and security. “Then we’ll just have to be careful.” Sliding over so that their bodies touched, she drew him into a hug. “Because I can’t give this up, not after having waited so long for it.”

“After last night, I’m beginning to feel the same,” Tai replied and gently brushed his lips against her own.

Kari responded with a soft kiss of her own before nibbling on his bottom lip. The devilish grin then danced upon her lips. “No more sugar for you, Tai Kamiya. Not until after you’ve finished your homework.”

A sour sulk covered her brother’s face. “That’s not fair!”

“Call it incentive,” she said with a smile. “Now, you had better get started.”

“What are you going to do?” he asked grumpily as he stood up from the sofa.

“I’m sure I’ll think of something,” she answered airily.

She followed suit and watched Tai head for his bedroom to fetch his school books. In turn, she headed for her own. Having completed her own weekend homework during yesterday’s study session, she had the rest of the day to herself.

Going into her wardrobe, she pulled out her new leggings, hung them on the door and then started flicking through her vanilla clothing. She pulled out a long-sleeved pale blue top, held it up against the black leggings only to shove it back inside. Not suitable, she thought as she continued rifling. Next she removed a long white shirt. Had she been able to afford the brown leather, steampunk corset, it would have worked perfectly without alteration. Her mind wandered for a moment to an image of her wearing the outfit, complete with a matching pair of thigh-high boots; it held a very swashbuckling pirate air. Alas, some things were not meant to be. Instead, she would have to partner the leggings with something else. Eventually she found a short-sleeved white top with a wide neckline. It would dye any colour she wanted once she’d figured out what to do with it. However, that was the only thing suitable she found.

Closing the wardrobe doors, she took both top and leggings in hand and fetched a sketchbook from her desk drawer, along with a pack of coloured pencils. Her drawing skills were not great, but good enough to do some rough sketches of her designs. Absentmindedly she flicked through the pages as she made her way out of her bedroom. Her eyes paused when she reached the first of many drawings in the Digivolution of her Digital Punk outfit. She would dearly love to take some photographs of her creation, but lacked the means to both star as model and act as photographer. Maybe she could rope Yolei into modelling for her. They had a similar build so her clothes should fit the other girl no problem. Perhaps if she said it was for a folio… Kari smiled to herself, or just offer her a stack load of chocolate filled crepes.

At the dinner table, Tai had already made himself comfortable and opened his school books. He raised an eye and watched her for a moment as she pulled out one of the spare chairs and draped the white top and leggings over it. Before she sat down, Kari made her way over to the hi-fi and opened her CD box. Her finger ran across the spines of the jewel cases, however, before she could make a choice, her brother spoke.

“Can I pick?” he asked, drawing her attention back to the table.

She gave him a quizzical look, “sure if you really want.”

Tai smiled at her. “Crises,” he said with certainty.

Kari pulled the green covered CD case from the box and opened it. If he was actively making a selection, it meant his initiate phase had come to an end and that he genuinely enjoyed the music; she’d reached him. Switching out The Dark Side of the Moon and putting it safely back in the box, she felt a warm smile form on her lips. “Welcome to the machine, Brother,” she said with a laugh as she put the CD on.

He chuckled and quickly fired back, “I thought I’d requested Crises, not Wish You Were Here.”

She crossed back over to the table and gave him a hug from behind. Taking in a deep breath through her nose in order to fully experience his scent of fresh grass, honey and lavender. Kari then sat down and opened her sketchbook to a fresh page. Picking up a standard drawing pencil, she sketched out both items of clothing while staring at them; waiting for inspiration. Eventually, after staring at the tips of her pencils, she pulled out one from each end of the spectrum, then shaded the left side of the top red and the right blue. She then considered the logistics, for ultimately that’s what it all came down to. If she could not physically do it, she would need to come up with a new idea. It would require two different dyes and she would have to stand and hold half of the top into the trough until it took, or rig up some sort of stand. It would then be a case of rinse and repeat for the other side. A pain in the butt, yes, but doable all the same. Kari then looked at the leggings in her drawing. Was there any way of incorporating the two colours into them? Her eyes glanced over the top of her sketchbook to the actual article of clothing and she had a lightbulb moment. Reaching out a hand she whipped them off the chair and looked at the ribbon that crisscrossed down each leg. It would be easy enough to remove. Tossing them back, she picked up her eraser and removed that detail from each leg in her sketch. And then made the left side blue and the right red.

“Have a bolt of inspiration?” she heard Tai ask from the kitchen; she hadn’t even noticed he’d moved.

She smiled at him, “something like that. You making any headway with your homework?”

He grimaced, “calculus sucks,” before holding up a soda can, “do you want one?”

Kari licked her lips and found them to be rather dry. “Please,” she replied, having not realised that she was thirsty.

The sound of the refrigerator door closing was accompanied by the closing notes of Crises. She glanced over to the CD player. “While you’re on your feet, can you put Tubular Bells II on?” she asked when Tai appeared from the kitchen.

He nodded and headed for the hi-fi. The sound of the opening piano notes stoked the fires of her creativity and she made to go back to her design, as her brother sat the soda can down in front of her.

“Once I’m done with this, I want another Mario Kart rematch,” he said upon sitting down once more, giving her his game face.

She sighed and deliberately rolled her eyes. “If you insist. However, I’m beginning to wonder if Davis will give me more of a challenge.”

Kari laughed when she could practically see the steam rising from his mass of chocolate hair. Her continued winning streak had clearly been getting to him and made it almost as easy to wind him up as it was to kick his butt.

“You’re going to slip up sooner or later, Sister. And when you do I’m going to shove one of your own turtle shells somewhere unpleasant.”

She threw her head back and let out a roar of laughter as a tear slid from her eye. “If you can pull them out of your own backside first.”

Tai growled at her as he picked up his pencil and started writing furiously. However, she could not resist one last dig, “and you haven’t even challenged me to Smash Bros yet. I can only assume that you’re too scared to.”

The sound of his pencil breaking caused her to grin evilly at him, but he somehow managed to contain himself. She decided to leave it at that, for he did still need to finish his homework after all. After taking a much-needed drink from her fresh soda, she returned her attention to her sketchbook, adding a red converse to the left side and a blue one to the right of the design. The former she already had, which meant she would just have to find a blue pair or buy another white pair and a can of blue fabric spray paint. Neither of which would be the most expensive of outlays. On a fresh page, she started to sketch herself, a grin still playing on her lips four weeks on when she coloured her hair orange and yellow instead of brown. Once she had finished attiring herself in her newly designed outfit, she tapped the tip of her blue pencil gently against her teeth. It felt unfinished. After a few moments of thought, it came to her; gloves. She sketched a blue fingerless glove on her right hand and then a red one on her left. They would be more difficult to come by than the shoes, but might still be manageable. However, while they improved the look, something else was still missing. She looked again at the sketch, tilting her head as she turned it this way and that. While some sort of jacket might work, anything other than her short denim one was beyond her means at present.

Glancing around the room for inspiration, she caught sight of Tai and the orange shirt he wore over his t-shirt. She smiled. A jacket might be beyond her means, but a shirt she could definitely do. Kari drew a baggy, open, long-sleeved black shirt onto the sketch of herself, adding a strip of red ribbon to the right arm and a blue one to the left. Perfect. She looked again at her brother when a thought occurred to her.

“Tai,” she ventured with a slight hint of caution.

He looked up from his calculus work, “yeah?”

“Do you have an old black shirt I could steal?”

Tai gave her a funny look, “maybe. What for?”

“I need one for the new outfit I’m designing and I think a guy’s one will look better,” she answered, feeling slightly embarrassed at having asked.

He thought for a moment before saying, “go have a look in my wardrobe and see what you can find. If you show me I’ll tell you if I still wear them or not.”

Kari tentatively sat down her sketchbook and headed through to his bedroom. Urgh, boy’s, she thought when she opened the doors to his wardrobe and was met with a disorganised mess of clothes, some of which lay in a heap at the bottom. Not to mention the smell of sweaty socks; yuck! It had not been nearly this bad when she’d been in here two weeks ago. However, given what her brother had gone through in the time since, it was no wonder that everyday things had taken a slide. Resisting the urge to pinch her nose, she started sorting through it.

“I thought you’d found a portal to the Digital World in there, you’ve been taking so long.”

Kari jumped when she heard the sound of Tai’s voice from the doorway. “Your wardrobe was a mess!” she declared on turning her head to face him.

“Was?” he asked, the corners of his mouth twitching slightly.

She picked up a ball consisting of dirty socks, boxers and a t-shirt and threw it at him. “It was until I cleaned it.”

Tai’s reflexes were quick and he caught the laundry bomb before it hit him in the face. “Hmm, I probably should have warned you about that,” he conceded airily, not sounding at all sorry.

“Put that with the dirty laundry,” Kari growled with a scowl, realising now that she had been played. Revenge for the Smash Bros comment no doubt.

He chuckled as he dumped the ball into his laundry hamper and crossed the room to join her. Reaching a hand into the abyss that was his wardrobe he plucked a long-sleeved black shirt from a hanger and held it out to her, “how about this one?”

Kari looked at it and recognised it instantly, he’d worn it only a few weeks ago. “You still wear this one,” she replied, without taking it.

“I know,” Tai said with a smile, “but it feels nicer than the other one I have and I want you to have it.”

She reached out a hand to stroke a brushed cotton sleeve. “I can’t just take one of your favourite shirts.”

“Of course you can,” he said and in a flash, reached out his arms and spun her around. Before Kari knew what was happening, Tai had draped the shirt over her shoulders followed by his arms. “Consider it a gift for having cleaned out my wardrobe for me. I’ve been dreading doing it since I got dressed yesterday.”

“Are you sure?” she asked, craning her neck to try and get a look at him.

“Absolutely. However, I want free re-matches at Mario Kart for as long as it takes for me to kick your sexy butt.”

She laughed and feigned a sigh, “I guess I won’t be getting any more CD’s from you any time soon.”

Tai retaliated by childishly pinching her bottom, causing her cheeks to burn slightly. “Well, guess what, Sister. I’ve finished my calculus homework. So get that nice ass of yours to that sofa and we’ll see how long it takes me.”

“Bring it, Bro,” she replied with a sassy smile.

His arms still wrapped around her shoulders, Tai turned her around and practically frog marched her out of his room and to the sofa. Still wearing what was now her shirt across her shoulders, Kari picked up her gamepad and waited for him to turn on the TV and GameCube. The logo’s flashed on the screen and her brother navigated to the two-player mode. On the character select screen, they picked their pairs of drivers; the Mario bros for him and the father-son Bowser duo for her. It was time for battle to commence once more.

##

It was a strange thing, being on top, Kari mused. While it had amused her to see the look on her brother’s face the first time she’d beaten him, it would not have bothered her if it had been a one-time deal. However, now that she had become used to winning, she felt an unfamiliar desire not to let her crown slip. So she’d raced her damnedest to ensure that didn’t happen. And thanks to a little good fortune, it didn’t. They’d played two tournaments, the first of which she’d won outright by four points. However, a vengeful Tai had managed to pitch her off the race track three-quarters of the way through the last lap of the first race of round two. He’d gone on to win and she’d only managed to salvage fifth. From that point on she’d been fighting to claw back the deficit. In the end, in a happy twist of fate, it had actually worked to her advantage. They’d finished level on points, but because she had been forced to win more races in order to make up for the bad result in the first, she came out on top.

“Close but no cigar, Bro,” Kari said with a grin as she sat down her pad.

His eyes narrowed as he glared at her. “We didn’t beat the Dark Masters in one day. Rather we slowly chipped away at them one at a time as we climbed Spiral Mountain. And I’m almost at the summit, little Sister.”

She flashed him a wicked grin, “I’ve heard this one before.” She then changed her voice so it was a fair approximation of Pidemon’s, “the sole Digidestined was then defeated by the Dark Mistress and sent tumbling all the way back down to the bottom.”

Tai laughed as he stood up. “I’ll put an end to your tyranny, Dark Mistress if it’s the last thing I do.”

“It seems this little Digidestined is getting a bit ahead of himself… TURTLE SHELL!” Kari yelled as though calling out an attack and sprang to her feet after him.

Catching Tai unawares, she barrelled into him and knocked them both to the floor. They wrestled for a few minutes, however, no amount of skill at Mario Kart would ever change the height and weight imbalance between the pair and Kari soon found herself pinned on her back. Their gazes locked and she felt as though a spark had just been ignited amidst the dying embers of last night’s fires. Her brother must have been struck by it too as instead of launching a tickle attack on her, he lowered his head until their lips met. Wrapping her arms around his neck and shoulders, Kari passionately returned the kiss. Within moments they had engaged in a glorious battle of tongues and lips.

The feeling of having her brother so close to her was the equivalent of dropping a petrol bomb amidst the now glowing embers and they exploded into an inferno of passion and desire. Without thought, Kari ran her hands down his back and found her way inside his top. Such was her want… no, need to feel his naked skin beneath her fingertips. She felt his back arch as she gripped his shoulders and furiously began rubbing. However, Tai did not respond in kind and she knew that he would not do so without her express permission; Bushido was not dead when it came to him at least. Between bouts of kisses, her breaths came in sharp pants and she could not get enough air to form words. So instead she withdrew one of her hands from beneath his top, took hold of one of his own and guided it underneath her green weirdo t-shirt, pressing it gently against her naval. The look in Tai’s eyes asked her if she was sure, to which she gave a brief nod. When both of her brother’s hands began to rub the soft flesh of her abdomen, Kari felt a jolt of pleasure shoot through her. In the heat of the moment, she wanted him so badly it hurt to try and contain herself. She gasped as he moved his hands around and lifted her back up off the floor so that he held her upright against his chest in his strong arms and began to massage her shoulders. Like ice cream on a hot day, she melted under his touch. Seizing the initiative, Tai began to run kisses down her neck, much like she had done with him the previous night. All Kari could do was clutch onto his back as she dissolved under all the attention that he gave to her. When his hands ran over her bra strap and did not even pause to consider, she felt the urge to yell at him to remove it so her breasts could join in the fun. However, both parties were denied the opportunity of second base by the ill-timed sound of the telephone ringing.


	33. Pt3 06) Time

**Part Three: Their Secret**

**Chapter Six: Time**

Tai’s hands stopped massaging his sister’s shoulders abruptly when he heard the sound of the telephone ringing. So much so that one could have been forgiven for thinking someone had just walked through the front door. His neck snapped around to look in the direction of the ringing device, while his hands tried to disentangle themselves from the inside of her t-shirt. He could feel a cold sweat trickle down his back as he tried to scramble to his feet; forgetting that Kari still had her arms wrapped around his shoulders.

“Tai…” His sister somehow got one of her hands free and brought it up to touch his cheek. He felt his head turn around until he found himself staring into those bright reddish-brown eyes. “Tai,” Kari said again soothingly, “it’s ok. It’s just the phone.”

His respiration rate slowed as he came to his senses. It was only the telephone. And it was still ringing. Gently he lowered his sister back to the floor so she could let go without her falling. “Sorry,” he breathed apologetically.

“It’s ok,” Kari laughed as she let go of his back, “I jumped a little bit too.”

Tai straightened up. “I suppose I’d better answer it. It might be Mom.”

His sister nodded and he heard her get to her feet and follow him to the phone.

“Kamiya residence, Tai speaking,” he said when he picked up the receiver and held it up to his ear.

“Hello, Tai, how are you and Kari getting on?” his mom said from the other end.

He turned just in time to see his sister’s head appear from underneath his free arm as she cuddled into him. “We’re fine, Mom,” he replied, trying to keep his tone neutral.

“Hi, Mom,” Kari chipped in. “How’s Grandma?”

Shaking his head, Tai shifted the phone across his body so that they could both listen in. “Your Grandmother is doing a lot better. The doctors are optimistic that with the right support in place, she’ll be able to go home on Tuesday.”

“That’s great news,” the siblings said in unison.

“However, it means your father and I are going to be staying another few days so we can help make all the arrangements and get her settled back home.”

Tai instinctively looked at his sister and saw a large smile spread across her face, like the Gatomon who had not so much gotten the cream, but the entire dairy farm. “When do you think you’ll be back?” she asked, beating him to the question.

“Your father spoke to his boss this morning and has been given extended leave until Wednesday. So unless something unforeseen happens we should be home sometime that evening. Will you Kids be ok until then?”

“We should be fine mom,” Tai said, struggling to keep his tone level as his sister slipped one of her hands down and started massaging one of his butt cheeks. Unfortunately, due to the position of his arms, he couldn’t swat her away without dropping the phone.

“Do you have enough food money to last until then?”

Kari, who had been left in charge of the food budget (1. Because she had been doing the cooking and 2. To stop him from buying junk and takeout), answered, “I used most of it to buy food for the past few days. And we don’t really have any money of our own left after I got my nose ring done and Tai paid to get me a tattoo.”

His face practically turned green and he looked at his sister in horror. She grinned back at him just as their Mom yelled, “WHAT!”

Kari let out a chuckle and quickly diffused the atomic bomb before it could go fully nuclear, “I’m joking, Mom. I made a promise on Gatomon’s life, remember.”

On the other end of the phone, Tai could almost hear the warning sirens shut down as the detonation counter stopped with barely a second remaining. “That was not funny, young Lady.”

“Sorry, Mom, I couldn’t resist,” Kari apologised in her ‘get out of trouble free’ tone.

Letting out a grateful sigh, he decided to take back some control of the conversation before his sister got him flayed. “What she meant to say was that she’s used most of the money buying proper food for us to eat since Friday.”

His sister stuck her tongue out at him in a spoil-sport manner.

Their mother’s voice returned to a semi-normal pitch and tone when she said, “well if you run out, take some from the savings jar in my wardrobe. But remember…”

“…no junk food,” Kari finished for her. “Don’t worry, Mom, I’m sure I can keep Tai’s urges for empty calories at bay.”

It was his turn to make a childish face as he listed to her talk. However, when the thought of a deep dish chicken and jalapeno pizza floated through his mind and made his stomach growl, he was internally forced to concede the point.

“Ok, but make sure the two of you keep out of trouble. I don’t want to come home to find you’ve burnt down the entire apartment complex.”

“We’ll be fine,” they said together while giving each other a knowing smile.

“Say hi to Dad and Grandma for us,” Kari then said.

“I will. Goodbye, Kids.”

“Bye, Mom,” they both said before the line went dead.

Tai hung up the phone and then looked at his sister. “That was not funny,” he said hotly.

Kari responded with a cute smile and squeezed his bum.

“And will you take your hand off my butt!”

The cute smile effortlessly vanished to reveal the devilish grin that lurked beneath. “You seemed so tense, I thought you could use a massage.”

Before he had the chance to reply, she shifted him around to face her. Reddish-brown eyes full of love and mischief stared into his own and he could not help but smile. Yet again, Kari had gotten herself out of trouble with only a look. Had she always been so knowingly manipulative or was this a recent development?

“I have been under a lot of stress lately,” he said in feigned admittance, though it did actually ring true. “Maybe you should give me a proper one.”

She reached up and teased his bottom lip with her teeth. “If you’re a good boy and get your schoolwork finished, maybe I will.”

His lips touched hers and within the tenderness of the kiss, the memory of his panic when the phone had rang melted away in the warmth that filled him. While he had already fallen in love with Kari without even realising it, he could not quantify how he felt in this moment as anything but that; falling in love. Perhaps the best way of explaining it was that he had fallen in love with his sister as she existed in his head. Now he got to do it with the real thing. And nothing had ever felt so right.

“Sounds like the perfect incentive,” he said when their lips eventually parted.

“Good, you go back to the books, I’ll make dinner.”

Kari kept one hand firmly on his backside as she escorted him back to the table. If their tussle on the floor was anything to go by, it seemed that she craved intimate physical contact between them too. However, he had promised himself that no matter how strong an urge he felt, he would not overstep a boundary they had not first discussed. They needed to sit down and have a serious conversation on this matter he realised. For he could already tell that finally allowing their pent up emotions free rein held the dangerous potential to rush them into something that neither of them was ready for yet. It seemed that the bonus alone time they had just been granted from their parents would now be invaluable. For it would hopefully give them a chance to talk some more and ride out these initial bubbles of lust that were overcoming them. Picking up his pen, he pulled his world history textbook towards him and opened it at the relevant page. Unlike these source questions, which had to be done for tomorrow, it seemed that he and Kari now had time.


	34. Pt3 07) Young lust

**Part Three: Their Secret**

**Chapter Seven: Young lust**

Kari stood at the kitchen counter with her eyes shut; a butcher knife in her hand. From the main living area, the hi-fi was pumping out the harsh yet beautiful wailing guitar climax to the first half of Mike Oldfield’s Ommadawn. A shudder passed through her like it always did when listening to the closing section of this piece. As if the notes were being picked out on her own heartstrings. When eventually the closing drum beat faded into nothing, she opened her eyes.

Looking over at the dining table she could see that Tai too had been captivated by the piece’s finale. For his head was tilted back and his eyes skyward. She couldn’t blame him. Not only had it been his pick, but it transpired that this particular composition ranked as a favourite for both of them. Still, he had work to do and perhaps needed a gentle reminder.

“I hope for your sake that there is a question about our living area celling on your next test,” Kari said, fixing her face with a firm expression.

Tai jumped slightly as he turned to face her. “I was just…”

“…Just loafing around listening to music and not doing your world history homework.” She held his gaze for a moment longer while she watched his features pale slightly. It had always been something she’d found cute about her brother, the way he got all flustered when girls took a firm stance with him. And the fact she had both the confidence and ability to do it to him made it all the more delicious now. However, in this instance, she chose to let him of light and started to laugh. “Don’t worry, Bro, I just did it too. At least you only had a pen in your hand.”

She giggled internally when she heard him breathe a sigh of relief. What he thought she might do to him she did not know. However, given that she was in the process of making dinner, it had probably involved her finding something of their mom’s in the freezer and serving it to him.

Tai let out a mild laugh. “Guess I just got a bit caught up in it,” he said before adding, “I hopefully won’t have too much of this left to do after dinner.”

“You might still get that massage then,” she said with a tempting smile. Turning her head, she checked the timer on the oven. “You’ve got about half an hour before I’m ready to serve, so make the most of it.”

He gave her a two-finger salute and returned his gaze to his notepad. Meanwhile, she went back to chopping some carrots and tender-stem broccoli that she would steam just before the pacific saury had finished cooking. When the beep-beep of the timer sounded, Kari turned off the oven and began plating up her latest dinner. With each and every dish she watched her brother savour, the more her confidence in the kitchen grew. To the point that she felt very little apprehension now when it came to serving him. Just something else that had become so much more comfortable for her to do around him over the past month.

“Tai, dinner’s ready. Can you make some space on the table for me?” she called out as she slid each piece of fish onto a plate beside the steamed vegetables and some boiled white rice.

“Sure thing, Sis,” she heard him reply to the sound of a book closing.

Kari picked up the plates and carried them over to where her brother sat; his books neatly stacked to one side. Setting them down, she made a quick trip back to the kitchen to fetch the chopsticks and a soda for each of them before taking up her seat.

“Enjoy,” she said with a smile.

Tai took a large sniff with his nostrils and a look of content spread across his face. Apparently, the smell of her cooking was enough to arouse feelings of bliss inside him. “It smells delicious, Kari,” he said, picking up his chopsticks.

His assessment transpired to be correct. They ate at a relaxed pace, her brother seemingly bringing his good table manners whenever she cooked now. Leading her to wonder if the reason he typically ate so fast was a learned habit from having eaten a few too many of their mother’s more disastrous dishes. It happened to be during this time that she recalled something from Friday night that events since had completely driven from her mind.

She chuckled when she belatedly said, “so I forgot to tell you something.”

Her brother looked up from his plate and surprisingly waited until he had emptied his mouth before answering, “what?”

“TK showed up on Friday night.”

The piece of fish he held slipped from his grasp as it and his chopsticks fell to his plate with a light clatter. “I thought you said that bridge was burnt entirely?”

“I thought it was,” she conceded, recalling the last time they had spoken about the boy, “but it turns out I’m a pretty good swimmer.”

Tai tilted his head, a puzzled look forming on his face that wordlessly asked for an explanation.

“I went to talk to him again on each of the following Monday’s since I first spoke to him. He was hostile to begin with but slowly started to ease off. However, it still came as a shock that he showed up. I guess something I said must have gotten to him.”

“So are you guys all friends again?”

“I’m not entirely sure,” she replied truthfully. “He and Davis decided to let bygones be bygones and while it felt a bit awkward at first, things started to feel the way they used to…”

“But?” Tai asked when she hesitated.

“I don’t know if it was a one-time deal just so I would stop bugging him. By the time we sat down for some pancakes, I knew something was wrong with you and so didn’t take the time to find out. I guess I’ll find out tomorrow.”

“Why are you going to go annoy him after creative writing club wraps up?” he asked with a chuckle.

“Honestly, I’m hoping he joins us for lunch,” when she received a quizzical look she added, “we’ve all started having lunch together on a Monday. Apparently, I’m the jelly that keeps our peanut butter sandwiches together.”

Tai shook his head. “One of Davis’ jokes,” he deduced with ease.

“How could you tell?” she laughed.

“Because it was worse than one of mine.”

“So you admit that you’re jokes are bad?” Kari asked slyly.

“I simply said it was worse than one of mine, not that my jokes are bad. Besides, it’s in his job description.”

She gave him a pointed look, “job description?”

“Yep. He’s my mini doppelganger, remember. A smaller, inferior version to the original in all respects.”

“That’s certainly true in the ego department,” she replied, but could not stop herself from laughing. That one had been genuinely funny.

They finished eating their main and it was only when she sat back down after having served dessert that she decided to broach a related subject. “Do you think there’s any chance we could make up with Matt and Sora, and get the whole group back together?”

“Why would I want to make up with that asshole!” His response was biting but she had already braced herself for it. However, she gave him a moment to calm down. “Sorry, Kari,” Tai said apologetically as he took a deep breath. “I guess I’ve not even bothered trying to work through my anger when it comes to Matt.”

“Maybe it’s time you did,” she said soothingly. “He is your friend after all. Not to mention that you fell out simply because both of you were trying to protect your younger siblings.”

Her brother let out a bitter sigh, “it’s not that simple…”

“Sora,” Kari finished for him, knowing that the red-head was inseparably intertwined with the problem. “Isn’t it time you let that one go?”

“What!” Tai said hotly, in a manner that suggested she’d asked him to cut off his arm. “How can I forgive him for that?”

Kari met his steely gaze with one of soothing love and support. “Because you’re not in love with her. And while you might not have thought about it yet, I don’t think you ever were. Otherwise, you would never have given Matt the opportunity to win her heart.”

The effect her words had on her brother caused his mouth to fall open and his eyes to look like he was staring at the infinite possibilities of life, the universe and everything all at once. She gave him a few minutes to try and process this newfound take on reality before getting up and moving around the table to where he sat. “Tai,” she said gently and gave him a light shake.

Her brother took a sharp inhale of breath as he returned to this version of existence with a sudden jolt. He looked at her in confusion, possibly trying to figure out how she had gotten from one side of the table to the other. “Sorry, must have zoned out for a sec,” he said with a shake of his head.

“Are you ok?”

“Yeah, I’ll be fine. I guess I hadn’t gotten around to thinking about things that way.”

Kari put her arms around his shoulders and gave him a hug. “We can talk about it if you want to.”

There was a moments pause as Tai considered his response. “No, it’s ok. I think I need to process this by myself for now.”

She gave him a light squeeze. “Ok, but you know where to find me if you change your mind.”

Going back to her seat, Kari elected not to continue the discussion about mending bridges with the other DigiDestined. For it was abundantly clear that her brother had issues that he needed to resolve inside his own head before that could occur. They finished dessert in silence, after which she cleared the table and started washing the dishes while Tai returned to his school work.

While returning the kitchen to its default state of cleanliness, Kari began to ponder how best to relive some of her brother’s tension via the massage she had promised him. By the time she had finished, a plan of sorts had formulated in her mind. Leaving him to his studies, she began searching the hall cupboard for the blow-up mattress that was used whenever one of their friends stayed the night. Unsurprisingly, it had not seen the light of day for some time and thus had been buried beneath a whole pile of other junk. The air pump had been just as difficult to procure. She had, of course, pondered using the sofa, but decided that it would be too cramped. Both of their beds were also given equal consideration but rejected on the basis that they were pressed up against a wall. She needed space to allow him to sprawl and for her to move around.

Tai looked up from his world history homework when she returned to the main living area and started moving the coffee table but did not say anything. Although he did give her a, ‘what on earth are you up to’ look when she turned on the air pump and inflated the mattress. When it had finished, she placed a brushed cotton sheet over it and went hunting for some candles, incense and oil. By the time she had found and set up everything she needed, her brother had triumphantly thrown down his pen and cleared away his school stuff.

“So what’s the deal?” Tai asked when he returned from his room.

Kari finished lighting the candles and crossed the room to turn off the lights. A warm, calming glow emanating from the array she had set up around the air mattress. She took in a deep breath through her nose, picking up the scent of the jasmine incense she’d burned. She crossed to the hi-fi, put in The Songs of Distant Earth and picked up the remote.

“Ok,” she said as she walked over to where Tai stood, “step this way and prepare to relax.” She took hold of his hand and led him over to the air mattress. “Now take off your shirt and t-shirt, then lie down on your front.”

“You didn’t have to go to this much trouble,” her brother replied. “I would have been content with you sitting and rubbing my shoulders.”

She gave him a smile and slowly began to slip his shirt off. “You’ll enjoy this a lot more, promise.”

“Well, if you insist,” he grinned, sliding out of his shirt and pulling his t-shirt over his head to reveal his well-worked torso.

Kari couldn’t resist running a hand over those muscular pecks before indicating for him to lie down. He looked so hot she couldn’t help but feel aroused. No, control yourself, she admonished her libido as she removed the black shirt she’d worn since he’d given it to her earlier in the day. Pressing play on the hi-fi remote, she picked up her bottle of oil and straddled him. Squeezing a generous amount onto his back, she spread it over his shoulders. Like his flesh was clay and she a sculptor, she started manipulating it to the gentle pace of the albums opening tracks.

“You really do have a lot of tension in those shoulders, Brother,” she whispered softly in his ear as a stubborn knot finally gave way under her fingers.

Tai winced at what must have been an initial spike of pain, but quickly let out a contented, “ohhhh.”

Kari let out a small laugh and continued working on the rest of his shoulders. For the next fifty minutes, she slowly made her way down his back, doing her best to relive as many of the points of pressure as she could; all that soccer practice had really done a number on him. When the last few notes of the album wrapped up, she took a steadying breath and pulled her t-shirt off. The thought had been going through her mind about if she was ready for this ever since their interrupted make-out session earlier that day. And the result had been an overwhelming yes. Not only did she crave being able to rub her hands all over her brother’s skin, like she had just done, but to also feel his touch on her own. However, for now, she would be keeping her bra on. While she had pondered bearing her chest for him, the idea had made her feel slightly nervous and so on that basis she had decided against it. Recalling something her mother had told her during **the **talk; if you’re not one-hundred percent comfortable, don’t do it. Not that she didn’t trust Tai, she would trust him with her life, but rather she wanted everything between them to feel right. Besides, this was only day two of a relationship that wasn’t even a proper relationship yet and she had an acute awareness that short term lust was at play. Which meant they both needed to be careful.

Lowering herself down, the bearer of light slowly allowed her naked belly to come into contact with her brother’s back. His eyes opened and he turned his head to try and look up at her. “Kari, have you...” he halted in his tracks when her breasts pressed against his shoulder blades. Only the thin fabric of her bra between them.

“Have I what, Tai?” she said seductively as she reached out and placed her hands atop his outstretched ones and ran them delicately down his arms.

Ever the caring older brother, he asked, “Kari, are you sure you’re okay with this? You don’t feel pressured do you?”

She giggled slightly. “From you, I’d more likely feel pressured to put my t-shirt back on.”

“Are you sure we aren’t giving into lust brought about by finally letting our feelings out?”

It seemed Tai too was well aware of the danger, to which she replied, “if we had already given into lust, we probably would have slept with each other last night. Something that I don’t think either of us is near ready for and that we would have deeply regretted come this morning.”

“I’m glad we’re on the same page then.” She felt Tai lift himself up onto his elbows so slid off his back so he could turn to face her. He looked her in the eyes before he next spoke. “I don’t want to rush things between us. Hell, I’m still not sure about what this is or what it could/should or can’t/shouldn’t be. And the last thing I want is for you to get hurt. I couldn’t live with myself if you got hurt because of me.”

Kari gently placed a hand atop one of his and gave him a caring smile. “I understand. I’m still having to pinch myself every hour to remind me that this is all real and not some sort of extended dream sequence. I can’t imagine how difficult it must be for you.”

“Actually,” Tai began, before pausing, “it hasn’t been. And that’s what’s worrying me a bit.”

“You feel like you should be questioning whether this is wrong at every step and turn?” Kari ventured, recalling how she had felt in the early days of her own revelation.

He nodded, “yeah. But when I kiss you, it just feels so right that any such thoughts don’t even get close to my mind.”

“It feels right for me too,” she reassured him. “So as long as we’re both comfortable, let’s see where this takes us. Only let's add another rule for when we’re making out, whereby anything that is still clothed is off the table unless we’ve both previously agreed to it.”

Tai gave her a warm smile. “You really do have common sense and wisdom well beyond your sixteen years, Kari.”

“I think my libido might argue that’s a bad thing,” she laughed.

“Mine too,” he said as he reached over and planted a kiss on her lips. “So it’s a good thing we’re not letting them take charge.”

“Agreed. But that doesn’t mean we can’t let them have a little fun.”

Reaching out a hand, Kari grabbed the back of Tai’s head and pulled him into a passionate kiss. He responded by wrapping his arms around her semi-naked torso and taking her shoulders in a firm grip that caused her to moan. Tongues dancing like two wild flames, she allowed her brother to pull her down on top of him. His strong hands continued to rub her back, with each caress feeling akin to a fan wafting the fires of her passion. Soon she turned to putty in his hands and offered up no resistance as he broke off their dance to plant kisses all down her neck.

“Uhhh,” she moaned, “you don’t know how long I’ve yearned for you to touch me like this.”

Tai broke off his treatment of her neck and gave her a wicked grin, reminiscent of the ones she now enjoyed giving him. “I wonder how you’ll cope if I do this...”

In a flash, her brother rolled her over so he was now on top. Pinning her hands above her head, much like he used to when they wrestled as children, he slowly started to run a trail of kisses from her neck all the way down to her navel. Each one sending a tingling sensation through her like a static discharge and eliciting a light, “uh.” When he reached the waistband of her jeans, he let her hands go and ran his own straight down her arms. Reaching her chest he continued down her front until he reached her breasts, where he skirted down her sides until he arrived at her abdomen. Internally, she pouted slightly at his adherence to her own rule; her breasts itched to be played with. Gently, Tai continued to run his hands over her belly as he started following his ‘breadcrumb’ trail back up her chest until their lips met once more.

Kari gazed into her brother’s chocolate eyes as they passionately resumed kissing. Everything that had happened over the past two day’s just felt so right that she wished it could last forever. Tai was hers and she was his. That was the only thing she cared about.


	35. Pt3 08) Lost for words

**Part Three: Their secret**

**Chapter Eight: Lost for words**

The weekend had come to an end and Monday morning had brought with it a light drizzle. At 7:00 am sharp, Tai Kamiya had been woken as per usual by his alarm clock. However, when he had reached out a hand to hit the snooze button, he’d come into contact something soft and skin-like. And it had not stopped the incessant beep-beep noise. Grudgingly he had been forced to open his eyes to discern what unholy obstacle was preventing him from going back to sleep. He’d found the bright eyes and smiling face of his sister beaming at him as, involuntarily, his brain started to wake up. Against his will and in a manner that suggested she had been enjoying herself far too much, Kari had dragged him out of bed and practically thrown him into the bathroom to shower. When he had eventually arrived in the main living area, he had found a pot of coffee, a glass of orange juice and a sizeable omelette waiting for him on the dinner table. His sister had given him a good morning kiss before he’d sat down and wolfed his breakfast. They had talked a little about the weekend and agreed that their intimate moments had been wonderful. She had then seen him out the door with another kiss and he’d headed for soccer practice with a smile on his face.

Tai had been on fire that morning. More awake than usual and having had a proper breakfast that he’d fully enjoyed, he’d ran literal rings around his teammates in their running exercises, felt sharper than he had in weeks on the pitch and capped the whole thing off by slotting a hat-trick passed the opposing keeper in the half-hour game they’d played. Needless to say, both he and his coach had been much happier with his performance. It had been a good start to the day.

Morning classes had then followed and while he had caught himself briefly daydreaming about Kari, the impact on his work had been negligible. In fact, it almost felt like the past two weeks had never happened. Had his sister experienced a similar immediate turnaround in fortune after confessing her secret to him four weeks ago, Tai thought as he entered the lunch hall. He was about to head for the same table as his soccer teammates when he caught sight of Matt sitting by himself. The conversation he’d had with Kari regarding the blonde-haired boy and Sora yesterday was still fresh in his mind. He’d given a lot of thought to what she had said about whether or not he had ever been in love with the red-head and realised that she might be right. Upon reflection, he had been so hot and cold with Sora, so should he/ shouldn’t he, that he’d not so much left the door ajar for Matt, but virtually opened it wide and rolled out the red carpet. If he had truly been in love her, he would have acted on those feelings far sooner. On that point at least he really couldn’t hold a grudge against his old friend. Taking a deep breath, Tai headed for the boy’s table and sat down.

“What the hell do you want?” Matt snarled without even looking up from his noodles.

The aggressive nature of his words almost got Tai’s dander up straight away, but somehow he managed to reign his temper in. Doing this for Kari, he told himself before opening his mouth to say, “I thought we could talk.”

“I thought you didn’t bother with words anymore and simply hit people.”

“Your brother had his hand on my sister after she had told him to back off,” he said, unable to fully keep the anger from seeping into his tone. “And for the record, I only shoved him away. He was the one who then came at me.”

Matt raised his eyes and shot him a glare so cold it would have liquefied nitrogen. “I don’t give a crap about any of your bullshit, Tai. You protect Kari like she’s some little angel, but you have no idea how much she hurt my brother and didn’t even bother to explain herself. Then she attacked Sora and you still took her side.”

He had to dig his nails into his palms in order for him to resist the urge to yell. Taking a breath through gritted teeth, he then responded with, “it’s not her fault TK wouldn’t believe the truth. And Sora was just as much to blame for that fight as Kari. Not to mention Sora gave as good as she got.” While his first point had been true and the second more or less accurate, the third was nothing less than a complete distortion of events. Kari had more than gotten the better of Sora and left the girl with three claw marks on her face that Gatomon would have been proud of.

Matt let out a howl of mocking laughter. “You just did it again. Sora had to get those claw marks stitched and was lucky not to scar.” The blonde boy then fixed him with another icy look, those blue eyes holding not a single shred of remorse for what he was about to say, “wake up and smell the coffee, Tai, your sister’s a bitch.”

He snapped. In a fit of rage Tai leapt to his feet and slammed his hands down on the table so loudly that the noise travelled across the entire lunchroom and drew the attention of almost all the assembled students. “Say that again!” he roared as the vein in his temple began to throb and his arms shook. All thoughts of diplomacy were long gone. One wrong word from Matt now and he would finish what he started that day they’d last fought.

“Look at you,” the other boy sneered, “all set to beat me up because you can’t hack the truth. I’d tell you to bring it, but I’m done indulging you.” Matt calmly rose from his seat and picked up his tray. “And in case I wasn’t clear enough, go fuck yourself, Tai.”

He was only a heartbeat away from diving across the table at the other boy when a stern voice stopped him dead in his tracks, “is there a problem, boys?” It was Mr Nishimura; the vice-principal.

“No, Sir,” Matt answered with a sly smile, clearly he had seen the teacher coming and timed his parting comments perfectly.

“No, Sir,” Tai echoed, feeling the sudden burst of adrenaline begin to ebb.

“Good, then let’s keep it that way,” the burly man replied in a no-nonsense tone. He lingered until Matt had walked off, then returned to scouting the room for any other potential outbreaks of trouble.

Tai sat back down and began picking at his lunch. That had been an unequivocal disaster. Not only had he completely failed to make any sort of peace offering, but had let Matt get under his skin to the point that he now hated him more than ever. It looked like Kari would have to be disappointed when it came to getting the entire group back together. Picking up one of his sister’s homemade sushi rolls with his chopsticks he popped it in his mouth, hoping that its great taste might help alleviate his now soured mood. Forcing his mind to recall one of his intimate moments with Kari, he completely missed the fact that someone else had just joined him at the table.

“I’ve got to hand it to you, Tai. No one else gets under Matt’s skin nearly half as well as you do.”

He looked up at the sound of the voice to see Izzy sitting across from him. “Thanks for reminding me,” he said bitterly, stuffing his mouth with another sushi roll.

“In fairness, you couldn’t have picked a worse time over the past year to try and bury the hatchet,” Izzy continued, seemingly unfazed by the coating of frost that had covered his words.

Tai rolled his eyes and knew he would probably wind up regretting taking the bait but asked nonetheless, “how come?”

The other boy made him wait until he’d opened his own bento box and taken a swig of black tea before answering, “his band is on the brink of breaking up and he and Sora have been fighting a lot recently. I’m surprised you haven’t noticed, they’ve not exactly been making an effort to hide it.”

“Kari’s got me listening to far more interesting stuff than The Teenage Wolves,” he said dryly.

“I was talking about Matt and…” Izzy started to admonish, but then saw the slight smile on Tai’s face and sighed. “The point is, Matt’s been like a barrel of gunpowder recently and you’re equivalent to one of Greymon’s Nova Blasts.”

Tai stabbed one of his salmon maki with one of his chopsticks. “So it’s my fault, is that what you’re saying.”

Izzy held his hands up. “Easy, Tai. I’m not saying that you’re to blame for what just happened. However, you and Matt have always been able to get under each other’s skin without intending to, especially when you’re not getting along.”

“Well don’t worry about it, I won’t be trying to talk to him again.” He picked up the salmon maki and pulled it off the chopstick with his teeth.

“While I’m not saying you should do that, I would advise against it for the time being. However, I would like to know what prompted you to try.”

Sighing, he took a long drink from his water bottle. “Kari’s been feeling a lot better these past few weeks and began patching things up with the younger DigiDestined.”

“What do you mean, Kari’s been feeling a lot better? Izzy asked. “I didn’t realise there was something wrong with her.”

“Neither did I until four weeks ago. It turned out that there was a lot about her I didn’t know.”

“Like what?” Izzy probed.

Tai reached into his pocket and pulled out his cell phone. Flipping it open he scrolled through his pictures until he found one of Kari dressed in her short red-tartan skirt, black t-shirt with red writing from h.NAOTO and her black choker; her hair like a lit match. He held the device out to Izzy and laughed when the boy’s mouth fell open and he did a double-take. “That’s Kari!”

“Yep. She’s either buying her clothes from places like h.NAOTO or heavily modifying stuff our mom bought for her. She also loves albums by Mike Oldfield and is starting to get into Pink Floyd.”

Izzy took another long stare at the picture before handing his phone back to him. “I can’t imagine your mom is happy with her new look.”

Tai laughed, “she went nuclear when she saw her new hairdo. Only since I was the one who took her to Teiko to get it done and paid for it, I took the brunt of the explosion.”

The other boy winced at what Tai could only imagine was his brain’s conjuration of the moment. However, he doubted Izzy had imagined anything close to the truth. “How is Teiko,” he then asked curiously. “I take it you still keep in touch with her?”

“Yeah, she’s good. She finished her traineeship earlier this year and is now a fully-fledged stylist at a place called Shockers.”

“Sounds appropriate,” Izzy remarked, “she always was a bit of a live wire. I’m actually surprised the two of you never hooked up, you were always pretty close.”

Tai laughed internally, recalling his failed date with the turquoise haired girl. It felt good to be able to think back on it and not feel a crushing weight from remembering that it was the catalyst to him admitting he had feelings for his sister. In that respect, he had no qualms about saying, “We actually went on a date two weeks ago, but found it to be far too weird. Turns out we’ve been good friends for far too long to make it work.”

“That’s a shame,” Izzy commented between mouthfuls of black tea. “Anyway, you were telling me about Kari.”

“Oh, yeah,” he paused for a second to remind himself of what the initial point had been. “Kari and I spent some time together a few weeks ago, where I found out about her new likes and dislikes and that she’d been suffering from depression.”

“Is she ok?” Izzy interjected.

“She’s doing a lot better now that she’s able to be herself,” he answered quickly before continuing, “anyway, the whole point is that after she started feeling better, she began patching things up with the younger DigiDestined. Long story short, all six of them went bowling on Friday night.”

For the second time, Izzy’s mouth fell open. “All six of them! You mean she and TK have actually made up?”

“I don’t think they’re quite friends again yet, but apparently he unexpectedly showed up and it soon felt like old times.”

“So that’s why you tried to talk to Matt,” Izzy deduced, spot-on as per usual. “You hoped that if Kari and TK could patch things up then there was hope for you and Matt.”

He nodded. “Kari told me about it last night and asked if I thought there was any chance the whole group would be able to get together again. I guess it was pretty stupid of me to think that asshole Matt would be willing to at least hear me out.”

“I wouldn’t quite put it like that. You just tried to talk to him at a particularly bad time.”

“Yeah, well like I said, I won’t be trying again,” Tai said, reaffirming his earlier stance.

Izzy looked ponderous for a moment before saying, “while the problem may be between Matt and Sora, and you and Kari, your forgetting something important…”

“Which is?”

“…there are four other people in our group if we exclude the new DigiDestined for a moment.”

“What’s your point, Izzy?” he asked irritably.

“My point is that if you really want to get everyone back together, you don’t have to face the problem head-on. Let some of us help lay the foundations before you try and build a new bridge.”

“If you want Matt telling you to go fuck yourself then be my guest,” Tai scoffed, not convinced that any of the other DigiDestined would get any further if they suggested to the blonde-haired boy that he come talk to him.

“You know I try to remain neutral and maintain good relations with everyone so would be less likely to trigger his dark mode. However, I was not talking about myself.”

“Who did you have in mind, Joe?” he snorted.

“No,” Izzy said smoothly as he looked him in the eyes, “Mimi.”

This time Tai burst out laughing. Granted the queen of all things pink would be a sound choice, as she had the uncanny ability to continually badger, bribe or blackmail someone into submission as though it were no more complicated than painting her nails. However, there was a gaping flaw in the other boy’s master plan. “Mimi’s in the US and her powers are useless when you can simply hang up on her.”

Izzy gave him a triumphant smile as if he had just played a trump card, “she’s moving back to Japan in the next couple of weeks.”

Tai looked at him, a mixture of awe at the boy’s omniscience and annoyance at having once more fell victim to it spread across his face. “When did you find this out?”

“Unlike you, I keep in touch with everyone,” Izzy admonished, still smiling. “Her father recently got a transfer back to his companies Tokyo office and so the whole family is moving back to Odaiba.”

He shook his head, “does she know what sort of a shit storm she’s coming back to?”

“I’ve kept her well informed about the situation between the other DigiDestined, yes,” Izzy replied. “However, while we wait for her to get back, you could always try talking to Sora. She’ll be far more likely to talk to you than Matt is at the moment.”

“How come?” he asked with interest. Given the blowout they’d had followed by her fight with Kari, Tai doubted that Sora would be any more willing to talk to him than Matt had been.

“Not only has she been fighting with Matt recently, but I hear she’s also been at loggerheads with her mom too. While she’s been avoiding everyone, I think deep down she’s feeling quite lonely and could use a friend who understands her right about now.”

“I suppose this is where I come into your equation?” he asked, already seeing the other boy’s train of thought.

“Precisely. I know you and Sora have had your issues..”

“Put lightly.”

“…but the two of you were very close friends for a long time and your relationship is nowhere near as combustible as the one between you and Matt.”

“In other words, I’m not a Nova Blast,” Tai said with a slight grin.

“So long as you don’t lose your cool I think we can safely downgrade you to a Pepper Breath,” Izzy chuckled.

He let out a longsuffering sigh, “ok, I’ll consider giving it a shot.”

“In that case, I wish you luck. It would be nice to get everyone together again.”

“Yeah,” Tai admitted, although internally he thought it was a pipe dream.

The pair finished their lunch while Izzy asked him about a message Davis had apparently sent to everyone, telling them to watch their backs for the video gaming assassin that was Kari. The other boy listened intently to his explanation about discovering how good his sister was with a green turtle shell, amongst other things. However, all the while he could not help but think about Sora and what it meant if Kari was right about his feelings, or lack thereof, for her. If so, then it would make talking to her that much easier should he decide to track her down.


	36. Pt3 09) No way

**Part Three: Their Secret**

**Chapter Nine: No way**

The official school day had come to an end, but for Kari Kamiya, there was still work to be done. Having gotten her grades up to straight A’s across the board during her year of self-imposed isolation, she now had to keep them there. In part, granted a very large part, it was to do with her mom’s perception of her. If she could show her that lit match hair and punky clothing could co-exist with excellent school grades, she hoped it would result in the woman finally accepting her new style. Or, dare she even consider it, get on board with it enough to bankroll some of it. The other part was the fact that she actually felt a sense of pride that she had managed to drag her school grades up to rank in the top ten percent of students in her year group. However, if she wished to keep them there, she needed to put in the hard graft. Hence, after school study sessions.

Kari sat in one of Odaiba Middle School’s many study rooms with a stack of books and her own handwritten notes surrounding her. Opposite her was Yolei. Since they had first studied together two weeks ago, it had become a common occurrence for the two of them to spend an hour or so after school, four nights a week, working on homework assignments or going over notes from the day’s lessons. While these were generally productive times, on occasion, such as today, the discussion went off-topic.

“So what did you really say to TK that convinced him to come on Friday night?” Yolei asked with an unhealthy amount of interest.

“Nothing,” Kari replied truthfully. “All I did was talk to him about his writing last Monday.”

She received a sceptical look, “you must have said something.” 

“The only thing I possibly did was remind him off how much fun we all used to have together. He certainly didn’t show up for my sake.”

“Well, you certainly made an impression on him, that’s for sure,” Yolei concluded.

Kari smiled, “I guess so. However, I still can’t believe he joined us for lunch today. It really was like the past year had never happened.”

“He must have enjoyed himself on Friday.” The lavender haired girl then started to laugh. “Granted, I suppose seeing the look on Davis' face when you threw that first ball straight into the gutter was enough in itself to make the evening worthwhile for the rest of us.”

She joined in and added, “or when I kicked his butt at Street Fighter.”

“I thought he was going to cry at that!”

“AWW NOT THIS GAME TOO!” Kari exclaimed in a rather good impersonation of Tai’s mini doppelganger.

Yolei burst into a fit of hysterics and it took a minute or two for her to regain her composure. When she eventually did, she moved the conversation on into new territory. “So, since we’ve just discussed both of your ex’s, I think it’s time we had a serious conversation about you and boys.”

She rolled her eyes, she had known this topic was likely to rear its ugly head sooner or later. In fact, she had expected it to be a lot sooner than today. “I already told you, I’m not interested in dating anyone else.”

“Oh come on, Kari!” Yolei exclaimed, clearly not willing to take the hint. “You only dated two fish from the school, there are plenty more where they came from. And with your looks, you could have your pick of virtually any of them.”

She laughed. “Maybe prim and proper Kari could have,” she conceded. An evil look then spread across her face. “But Digital Punk Kari is liable to send most of them running back to mommy.”

“You will if you approach them looking like that!”

“How else would you have me do it?” she asked rhetorically. “Act like the sweet, innocent girl I used to be?”

“Well, it would certainly be more attractive than going up to them looking like you’re liable to devour them whole,” Yolei asserted.

“And there’s the problem. I don’t want to be with someone who won’t accept me for who I am from the get-go,” she replied, wishing to say that her criteria for a man were only met by one person; Tai. However, she knew it was completely out of the question. While her friend might love forbidden romance stories, she could not take the risk. What she did say was, “besides, the point is moot because I don’t want to date any more boys.”

Instead of taking the hint and changing the subject, Yolei gave her a ponderous look. “Kari…” she said tentatively in a low voice, “…is the real reason you don’t want to date any more boys because you like girls?”

Kari was stunned into silence and her mouth fell open at the question. Of all the reasons she thought Yolei might come away with, that had not been it. When she eventually recovered she found that the only thing she could do was laugh. Not in a derogatory way mind you. Given that her own feelings were incestuous by nature, she automatically found herself supportive of love regardless of genders. However, in this instance, the lavender haired girl had found rabbit droppings and immediately thought there was an elephant.

“What’s so funny?” Yolei demanded in a slightly irritated manner.

“When have I ever given you any indication that I like girls?” Kari asked, struggling to contain her laughter.

The other girl thought for a moment. “You were ogling that girl two lanes over from us at the bowling alley!” she said triumphantly.

She shook her head, managing to keep her amusement at chuckle level. “I was checking out her trousers, they were so cool.”

The lavender haired girl pursed her lips and continued to wrack her brain. When eventually she came up with nothing, Kari firmly put the kybosh on the whole idea. “Sorry, Yolei, but you’re one-hundred-percent wrong this time. I’m not attracted to girls.”

“Ok, fine, I get it. You’re not a lesbian.” There were a few minutes of silence in which it felt like they were going to recommence proper studying, when Yolei then asked, “so who is he?”

Kari looked up from her notes, having only just found where she’d left off. “Who?” she asked.

“The person whom you fell in love with two years ago?”

She groaned internally. She had been hoping that her friend had forgotten about that part of her story. “I don’t want to discuss that.”

Yolei fixed her with a firm look. “Come on, Kari, given that you’ve just taken the alternative off the table, he’s clearly the reason you don’t want to date other boys. So who is he?”

She returned the look with one of her own. “Please just let it go, Yolei. I don’t want to talk about him.” It was only a half-truth. Part of her desperately wanted to share her love for her brother with the girl. To sit and do the girly thing where they compared boyfriends. Except Tai was not her boyfriend and even if he was, the love they shared had to remain a secret.

Her friend looked ponderous for a moment before looking down at the book sat open in front of her. A minute of silence passed and Kari assumed that was the end of the matter. However, Yolei suddenly said, “is it Matt?”

“What?” was all she could say in response, raising her gaze back up from her notes to look at the girl.

“Is it Matt?” Yolei repeated. “He would certainly fit the bill. He was in a stable relationship two years ago, which would have made it wrong for you to want to go out with him. So instead, you go out with his brother. However, while they may look alike, TK and Matt are very different. In the end, while the cheerful writer might have suited sweet and innocent Kari, the brooding musician would definitely be more up Digital Punk Kari’s street.”

“Ok, fine, it was Matt,” Kari lied, trying to make it sound like Yolei had genuinely figured it out. In the hope that she might believe her and let the subject go permanently.

The other girl studied her face before saying, “you’re lying. Besides, what was I thinking? Matt was a stupid suggestion.”

“And why is that,” Kari asked dryly, then quickly regretted it.

“Because he doesn’t fit your profile,” Yolei said quickly, her brain clearly whirring now.

She gave the other girl a confused look, “my profile?”

“The profile you did, silly. The who’s my perfect guy one.”

Kari raised a hand to her forehead and shook her head. How on earth did her friend remember that? The only reason she did was that it had been spot on and helped tell her that she was in love with Tai… SHIT! If Yolei remembered her answers correctly and started matching boys to it, would she eventually zero in on her brother? She could only hope that the girl either didn’t include him in her analysis or dismissed him as being an impossibility. Trying to keep a cool visage, she let out a small laugh, “that was just a trashy teen magazine quiz. Not only am I surprised you even remember it, but that you would even bother with such rubbish.”

“It gives me something to work off of,” Yolei said with far too much enthusiasm. “Besides, innocent and sweet Kari valued honesty.”

When she heard the girls tone, Kari knew that she would not drop this, even once this conversation ended. However, she had little choice but to remain calm. The last thing she needed to do was let the other girl know that the stupid quiz had been spot on. “It’s a bit outdated, don’t you think. Especially if innocent and sweet Kari answered it.” She flicked her orange, yellow and blond bangs. “That girl is long dead. Long live Digital Punk Kari!”

A sour expression formed on Yolei’s lips at having been thwarted. And for a moment Kari thought she had gotten away with the deception. However, the look slowly morphed into a smile. “Nice try, but you said you fell in love with mister mystery before going out with TK, while innocent and sweet Kari was very much still alive.”

Crap! It had been worth a try at least. With plan A sunk, she moved on to plan B. “You’re not going to figure it out because it’s not someone you know. And you’re never likely to meet them.”

If Yolei heard a word she said, she gave no indication. Instead, she continued to verbalise her own train of thought. “So we’re looking for someone who is tall, has brown hair, is kind-hearted, has big pretty eyes… Wait, no, not pretty… beautiful. Oh God yes, the eyes have to be right. That was what you singled out as your most important feature. Big beautiful brown eyes that have so much warmth they shine like the sun…”

Kari zoned out and went back to her notes as Yolei spent the next five minutes regurgitating each and every detail of her answers to that stupid quiz. Unfortunately, her friend could be exceptionally persistent when it came to this sort of stuff and once she eliminated all the likely suspects, how ever long that might take, would probably start going after the unlikely ones. She would have to be prepared for the eventuality that at some point, even if her friend had to go through the other three-billion men on the planet first, that Tai’s name would pop up…

“Kari…”

…When it happens, just laugh it off like you did the lesbian question. Make it seem so utterly ridiculous that she swiftly moves on. Even if it means you have to say something insulting about him…

“Kari…”

…Something like how he made you smell enough of his sweaty socks when you were kids that…

“Kari!”

She jumped when a hand waved quickly in front of her face. Shaking her head as she returned to the outside world, Kari looked up to see the irate face of Yolei staring at her. “Sorry,” she mumbled, “I must have been lost in thought.”

“Yeah well, you’re going to be serving dinner late if you don’t get a move on.”

Her eyes moved to look up at the clock on the wall and saw that her friend was right. She still had to stop off at the store on her way home, given that she had not known she needed to cook tonight until late yesterday afternoon. Closing over her notebook, she saw that Yolei had already packed away most of her own stuff. Gathering together her books, she deposited them inside her bag and stood up. It was when they left the study room that she remembered there was something she’d wanted to ask the other girl.

“Yolei,” she ventured carefully, “can I ask a favour?”

The lavender haired girl turned to look at her. “You can ask, but I make no guarantees you’ll get it.”

Kari laughed. “Would you consider doing a bit of modelling for me?”

A slightly nervous expression covered Yolei’s face and laced her tone, “what sort of modelling?”

“I would really like to do a shoot or two of some of my wardrobe creations, but obviously can’t model the clothes myself and point the camera. So I need someone who’s a similar height and build to me to do the modelling part.”

“Can’t I be the person that points the camera?” her friend offered instead.

Kari had been prepared for this suggestion and, in the nicest way possible, said, “Yolei, you are amazing at so many things, but photography is not one of them.”

The other girl sighed, “that is true. You were always the shutterbug of the group. But I’m not sure about modelling for you… I get rather self-conscious about my appearance... not like you. At least not Digital Punk Kari.”

“It’s ok, Yolei,” she replied, trying to mask the disappointment in her voice. “I don’t want you doing something that you’re not comfortable with.”

“I’m not saying no,” the lavender haired girl blurted out. “It’s just… it would depend on what exactly you wanted me to wear.”

“Tell you what,” Kari ventured carefully. “Why don’t you come over after school some time later this week. I’ll show you my wardrobe and sketchbook and you can see if there are any of my outfits that you’d be comfortable wearing.”

“I guess it couldn’t hurt to look,” the other girl conceded, before pausing. A smile crossed her face when she said, “unless you want to tell me who mister mystery is.”

She gave her a sideways look, “really? You’d seriously sell your self-conscious butt down the river just to find out one juicy bite of gossip?”

“To find out the identity of the individual who stole Kari Kamiya’s heart, drove her relationship with Takeru Takaishi to disaster and ultimately led to the sweet boy getting his heart ripped out? Hell yes, I would!” Yolei declared emphatically. “So how about it?”

Without a seconds thought, Kari shot the idea down with a cold, “no.”

The other girl rolled her eyes, “come on! Like you said, I’m practically selling my own butt to you. And all for one tiny bit of gossip. Surely that’s got to be worth it.”

“Sorry, no dice.”

Yolei pouted, “fine. But if I’m not comfortable with any of your outfits, you get squat.”

“I’m prepared to take that chance,” she replied.

The two girls left via the main entrance, with Yolei electing to walk Kari over to the bike racks. Retrieving her blue framed bicycle, they headed to the front gates where they exchanged goodbyes. With the lavender haired girl heading off to contend with her hectic family and Kari to buy something for dinner and spend another evening alone with mister mystery or as she liked to call him, Tai.


	37. Pt3 10) Stay

**Part Three: Their Secret**

**Chapter Ten: Stay**

After yesterday’s lunchtime spat with Matt and discussion with Izzy, Tai Kamiya had been in a bitter mood when eventually he arrived home. However, like a soothing balm, his sister’s embrace when he stepped through the apartment door had quickly mellowed him. By the time her sweet lips were tasting his own, all thoughts of the other DigiDestined had slipped from his mind as he settled back into what had become the norm; Kari and himself alone. They’d eaten dinner, did homework while listening to music, used breaks to beat each other up at Killer Instinct and then shared a passionate yet relaxed make-out session before bed; their lust having started to settle down.

Today he had been woken by the soft touch of her lips against his own as she’d coaxed him out of bed and into the shower. Pancakes for breakfast had then followed, after which he had left her with a goodbye kiss and a promises to come home as soon as he could that evening. Indeed, by the time he arrived at school that morning, all thoughts about his conversation with Izzy and any idea he’d had about talking to Sora the previous day, had been completely forgotten. That was until he saw the red-head, her cheeks stained with tears, run past him down a corridor at morning break.

Tai’s head swivelled around as he watched Sora dart past him. The sight of her distraught features hitting home exactly what Izzy had said about her the previous day; she was having a very bad time of things. Feelings of friendship and regret started to outweigh those of bitterness and hate in his heart at the sight of her so clearly upset. While this sort of situation usually wound up with him falling into a metaphorical pit-fall trap, Tai set off after her. At least in this instance, he had an advantage. For whatever had upset Sora, he could be certain that, for once, it had not involved him.

Tearing up a set of stairs the surprisingly quick girl almost evaded him before he eventually caught sight of her slipping inside an art supply room. He slipped a hand between the buttons of his shirt and gripped at his crest of courage pendant; he’d taken to wearing it again after his date with Teiko. His other hand found the door handle. Here goes nothing… Tai opened the door outwards to behold the sight of Sora huddled on the floor in the dark. When the light from outside touched her face, the red-head glanced up at him.

“Hi,” Tai said softly as he reached out a hand to find the light switch. “Can I come in?”

The overhead strip-light flickered into life but he received no response as Sora turned her face away. Taking the initiative, he closed the door behind him and crossed the short distance between them. Without asking for permission, for he doubted he’d get it, he sat down beside her, back against some floor to ceiling shelving. He could not help but see the parallels between this situation and when Kari had told him her secret. If he could navigate his way through that bombshell, surely he could do this.

Electing to forgo the traditional but inappropriate, ‘are you ok’, he decided to lead with, “do you come here often?” Izzy had suggested she’d been avoiding people so it was a reasonable assumption that this is where she’d been coming.

Sora said nothing but gave a slight nod of her head.

Tai gave the small room a cursory glance, “I suppose it’s quite quiet in here. A good place to go to cool off after an argument…”

When her head turned to face him, it dawned on him just how stupid that remark had been. Hastily he tried to retract it, “not that I’m saying you’ve been arguing with anyone. It’s just this place gives off a very after argument vibe you know. Somewhere calm you can come to let off steam…” oh crap, “…not that you need to let off steam or anything…”

His own grave digging ramblings were cut off when Sora unexpectedly started to laugh.

“What’s funny?” he asked in alarm. He’d practically blown it out of the gate and she found it amusing?

“You,” Sora replied in-between laughs, “you were always terrible at this sort of thing.”

I wasn’t with Kari, he thought hotly. However, his brain quickly reminded him that, like with everything, his sister was the exception to the rule. “I suppose some things never change,” he admitted with a warm smile.

“I guess not.” The look of amusement suddenly faded and she turned her face away once more. “What are you doing here, Tai?” she then asked in a flat, sombre voice.

“I thought you could use a friend,” he replied. While Izzy may have suggested it to him yesterday, it was now a genuine feeling he had inside.

“But we’re not friends… not anymore…” after the words left her mouth she turned her back on him. “Just leave me alone, Tai.”

At that moment, he found himself facing a choice. Either he could do the easy thing, stand up and walk away, or choose the difficult road his sister had and attempt to rebuild a bridge. He reached out a shaking hand only for memories of the hurt and pain he had suffered at the hands of the red-head to engulf his mind. He froze. The day Sora had chosen Matt over him he had felt as though she had shoved a knife into his back and through his heart. He’d sworn afterwards that he would never forgive her for it. Indeed these few lines of conversation had been the first they’d shared since.

He motioned to pull his hand away, only for Kari’s soft voice to whisper inside his head, _“you’re not in love with her, Tai. And I don’t think you ever were.”_ He had thought about what she had said on Sunday evening and come to the conclusion that she had been right. He didn’t love Sora, for he was in love with her instead. And all his short-lived relationships had failed because the girl in question was not his sister… any relationship he might have had with the red-head would eventually have been doomed to failure for that very same reason. In the end, though it had hurt him terribly at the time, he found that he could no longer blame Sora for her decision. For ultimately, he would have been able to offer her no more than Kari had TK.

Tai reached out and laid his hand upon the girl’s shoulder. Exerting light pressure, he turned her around to face him. “I’m sorry for what I said the last time we spoke and I forgive you for what you said and for the decisions you made. Just know that if you need a friend, I’ll be here for you.”

When after a minute or two she said nothing, he lowered his head and motioned to turn away. He should not have expected anything more. He had been downright nasty to her when she’d told him that she was going out with Matt. While he might be ready to forgive her, that did not mean that she would be willing to forgive him so easily. “I’ll leave you alone if that’s what you want,” he said as he stood up and headed for the door.

He was just about to turn the handle when, in a broken whisper, he heard her say, “Tai…” he turned back to look at her, “…please don’t leave.”

Tears were running once more down the girl’s cheeks and he knew that he could not, in good conscience, leave her. His hand left the door handle and he crossed the short distance to sit down beside her again. Her large red eyes, full of sorrow and pain looked into his own with sincerity. “Will you sit with me?” she asked in a fragile voice. “I could really use a friend right now.”

“Of course,” he replied, leaning back against the wall once more. “Do you want to talk about what’s bothering you?”

“You don’t have to listen to my problems, Tai. Just sit with me for a bit.”

He gave her a smile, “that was always your problem, Sora. You would listen to everyone else’s problems and help them in any way you could, but when it came to your own, you would keep them bottled up inside.”

She sighed, “I guess there is a brain beneath all that hair and thick skull of yours after all.”

He laughed slightly where once he would have retorted with something stupid like, _“what’s that supposed to mean.” _Allowing a few moments of silence to pass between them, he eventually said, “So is it trouble with your mom... or with Matt?”

It was Sora’s turn to let out a faint laugh. “Guess I was wrong, it’s not a brain you’ve got, rather a more observant friend with red hair and an obsession with computers.”

“It’s difficult to observe something about someone if you’ve been purposefully ignoring that person,” Tai replied dryly.

“You noticed something today,” she countered.

“That’s because I decided to stop ignoring you. However, that’s beside the point, you’re deflecting.

“You caught me,” Sora said with a forced laugh.

Tai looked her straight in the eyes, a serious expression on his face, “so which one is it, your mom or Matt?”

Sora turned away from him before whispering, “both.”

“Ok, tell me about it.”

“My mom’s been putting a lot of pressure on me to help out more in the store. So between that and all the school work we’ve had lately, I’ve had time for precious little otherwise.”

“I take it that’s why Matt’s been giving you a hard time,” Tai said, feeling a pang of hatred towards his former friend.

“It’s not just Matt, it’s all the girls too.” He watched a fresh wave of tears roll down her cheeks as she spoke. “Mom’s been at me so much over the past month that I’ve been ostracized by all the other girls because I can never hang out with them.”

“So what happened today? Another fight with Matt?”

She nodded as she broke down and, catching him by surprise, buried her head into his chest. Tai felt an initial wave of awkwardness, but it quickly passed and so he put his arm around her shoulder. Deciding not to press her further, he instead just allowed her to sob. Sometimes just having a shoulder to cry on helped. After a few minutes, she raised her head and sat up. He watched as she reached into her bag, pulled out a tissue and started to dry her eyes.

“I’m sorry, Tai. I don’t know what I was thinking there, she eventually said.

“There’s no need to apologise. You were upset and in need of someone to comfort you,” he replied reassuringly. “Are you going to be ok?”

She nodded, “I’ll be fine.”

From out in the hallway, Tai heard the chime that signalled the end of morning break. Climbing to his feet, he held out a hand. Sora looked at it for a moment before taking it and allowing him to help her rise. He stooped to pick up her bag then held it out to her.

“If you need to talk some more, don’t hesitate to either come find me or to give me a call. I promise I’ll be there to listen.”

Sora took her bag from his outstretched hand then looked him directly in the eyes. “If it had been roles reversed, I’m not sure I could have done what you just did today. It must have taken all your courage, Tai... thank you.”

At the risk of blowing up everything he had just done, Tai took a gamble. “It’s not really me you need to thank,” he began, however, hastily added, “and it’s not Izzy either,” before she suggested it for him.”

She looked at him, confused. “Who then?”

He took a breath, not certain how she would react when he said, “Kari.”

“Kari? What does she have to do with it?” there was a slight edge to her tone, but, given the bad blood between her and his sister, that was a positively glowing response.

“It was her idea that I should try and talk to you. She recently helped me work through my feelings towards you. If not for her, I would probably have just let you go without batting an eyelid earlier.”

“Oh...” Sora said slowly, sounding slightly speechless.

Tai took the opportunity to add, “she wants you to know that she’s sorry for what she did.”

“Thanks for telling me,” she replied and walked slowly towards the door. “We should probably head to class.”

Tai followed her out of the supply room and the pair made their way back to class without saying another word to each other. While both fate and fortune seemed to have been looking down upon him more favourably than yesterday with Matt, it had perhaps been foolish of him to drop his sister’s name into the mix so soon. For he was now far less certain that there would be a second conversation between them than he had been before doing so. He supposed only the passage of time would give him that particular answer.


	38. Pt3 11) A new machine - Part 1

**Part Three: Their Secret**

**Chapter Eleven: A new machine – Part 1**

All good things must come to an end. And this was never more true than when Mr and Mrs Kamiya returned home late on Wednesday evening. Having spent four blissful days with only her brother and herself at home, it had been agonising to watch her parents enter the apartment and resume the status quo. At bedtime, she’d gone into Tai’s room and locked the door just so she could share one last kiss with him. Even though it broke their own rules, it transpired that he had been about to do the same thing. Deciding to make an exception this once, they shared a single passionate kiss.

When her alarm clock sounded next morning, Kari climbed out of bed and like she was on autopilot, made her way straight to the bathroom. When she had eventually washed and dressed in her green sailor-suit school uniform, she’d headed into the main living area of the apartment. Arriving to see her mother in the kitchen making breakfast, while her father sat reading the newspaper with his usual morning coffee felt like an icy bucket of reality had just been thrown at her. The time in which she and Tai could openly express their love for each other had come to an excruciating end.

“Morning, Kari,” her father said as he lowered his paper to smile at her.

“Morning, Dad,” she dutifully replied, managing to keep the resentment she felt out of her tone.

“Kari, can you go and wake your brother,” her mom then called out from behind the kitchen counter, “he’s slept in again.”

She froze at being issued the instruction and her cheeks uncontrollably blushed. However, was spared the embarrassment of anyone noticing in the most unexpected way.

“No need, Mom, I’m awake,” the still half-asleep voice of Tai called out from down the hall. This was quickly followed by the sound of the bathroom door opening and closing.

Kari breathed a sigh of relief and felt the heat from her scarlet cheeks start to dissipate. She would need to be more on guard from now on, she realised. Without saying anything else, she sat down at the table. It was a depressing thought. She had only recently been able to leave her bedroom without her walls in place and now it seemed she might have to return to that state of isolation, at least temporarily. Letting out a sigh, she called to mind the opening of Shine On You Crazy Diamond Pts1-5. This was going to be difficult.

Between the notes of the initial keyboard and guitar solos, she answered the catch-up questions about how school had been this week, if she had enjoyed herself when out with her friends on Friday and, of apparent greatest importance, had she gotten a tattoo or body piercing while they had been away. She’d rolled her eyes at that last one and asked her mom if she wanted to check every inch of her skin. And quickly regretted doing so when the woman stood and considered it while roving her eyes over every part of her that she could see. Thankfully, she had declined.

Kari gulped and hoped it had not been noticeable when her brother gingerly sat down opposite her. A stolen glance at his eyes told her that he too was having difficulty adjusting himself back to the norm. From that point on, each and every word and action had to be screened for anything that could be construed by her parents as inappropriate; it was exhausting. When her mother sat a bowl of cereal topped with fresh fruits and a glass of orange juice down in front of her, Kari felt grateful for the distraction. Something that would take her mind away from how cute her brother looked when he let out a yawn, or how sweet his lips had tasted during their last kiss, or how much she yearned to give him a kiss goodbye like she had done on each of the three previous mornings. It wasn’t fair!

Across the table, Tai it seemed had turned to his cell phone for solace. After a few moments, in which they all ate in what felt like an awkward silence, she heard her own phone vibrate from beside her. Setting down her spoon, she flipped it open and glanced at the text message.

_“I don’t know about you, but I’m finding this really difficult.” _

She raised her eyes to glance at her brother, who had gone back to eating his breakfast, before sending back, _“Me too. It feels like things have gone back to the way they were four weeks ago, only times 10.”_

Kari ate another few mouthfuls of cereal while she waited for his reply. _“I didn’t think it would be this bad. Are you going to be ok? P.S. put your phone on silent so mom doesn’t get suspicious.”_

She took his advice before she next replied, _“I’ll manage. I’m more worried about you. You’re not feeling the need to cut your wrist, are you?”_

_“I certainly feel like I did last week. Only I want you more.” _

A slight bubble of fear started to form when Kari read his words. The worst-case scenario, bar their parents finding out what they had been doing, would be for her brother to resort to cutting himself. _“We need some time alone to talk,” _she sent back quickly.

_“Agreed. Leave with me in ten minutes and I’ll walk part of the way to school with you.”_

_“Ok,”_ she replied, picking up her glass and draining the last of its contents.

Rising from her chair she turned to look at her mother. “Thank you for breakfast, Mom,” she said as her brain worked quickly to come up with an excuse for why she would be leaving early. “I need to go get my things together and leave so I can meet Yolei before classes start. We want to go over last night’s math homework together as we both found it pretty difficult.”

Her mother nodded approvingly before turning to her brother, “you had best make tracks yourself, Tai, or you’ll be late.”

She heard her brother feign a sigh when he replied, “I’m going, I’m going.”

Leaving her family at the table, Kari headed into her bedroom and started putting her books into her school bag. They were joined by her headphones and music player; Wish You Were Here having already been chosen as the soundtrack for lunch. Satisfied that she had remembered everything, she left her room, said goodbye to her mother (her father had already left for work) and waited at the front door for her brother. Hoping that something so innocuous would not arouse suspicion. God, she was starting to become paranoid and their parents had been home less than twenty-four hours.

Fortunately, Tai did not leave her hanging long. When the apartment door closed behind them, they both breathed a heavy sigh of relief. That had been torture. Walking towards the stairs, Kari felt her brother place a hand around her shoulder and pull her into a half hug. Just feeling the warmth of his embrace was enough to soothe her but forced her to whisper, “Tai, what if somebody sees us?”

“Then they’ll see a brother giving his sister a small reassuring hug,” he replied softly and smiled at her. “People tend not to see a flock of sheep and immediately start looking for wolves.”

She put her arms around his waist and gave him a light squeeze before they reached the top of the stairs and disengaged from each other. However, they said nothing more as they made their way down to the undercroft and unlocked their bikes. It was only once they were safely away from the apartment building that she broached the issue. “So what do we do?”

Unfortunately, her brother did not immediately have an answer, “I don’t know. Like I said earlier, I never imagined it being so difficult to transition back to normal.”

“That’s because it isn’t normal, at least not for us, not anymore,” Kari replied, an edge of frustration creeping into her tone.

“It was only five days,” Tai began, before pausing mid-sentence, “but I think you might be right. Going back to keeping our feelings inside feels wrong somehow.”

“It is wrong. But we don’t have a choice, at least not when mom and dad are at home.”

“This is all happening so fast…” her brother trailed off and she could tell that, despite what he might want her to think, the whole situation was still proving difficult for him to fully comprehend. At least she had the security of knowing exactly what she wanted; having had two years to figure it out.

Kari took a hand off of her handlebars and rested it atop his own. “I know we never intended for it to work out like this, in fact, we even made a decision to take things slowly, but with the freedom we had over the last five days, I think it felt like we were in a relationship without that ever being the intention.”

Tai turned to look at her, his chocolate brown eyes showing uncharacteristic uncertainty and fear. “Do you understand why I thought this might be a bad idea now?”

Kari stopped her bike abruptly and took her hand back. “Don’t treat me like a child, Tai,” she said with a slight flash of anger. “I understand better than you how hard any sort of relationship between us will be. However, that’s something I’m more than willing to accept.

“Kari, I didn’t mean it like that…”

She cut him off, “no, that’s exactly how you meant it. Like I’m still your baby sister that needs to be protected from everyone and everything in the world.” If at the first sign of difficulty, he thought he could just revert to overprotective big brother mode and retain the right to make the decisions by himself, then he had another thing coming. “Well, news flash, Tai, I’m not.”

The look on her face, combined with the harsh manner in which she spoke, must have taken him aback slightly as he shied away from her slightly. And when the blazing gaze from her reddish-brown eyes refused to waver, he turned to look at the ground. “I’m sorry, Kari,” he said sombrely. “This is all happening so fast that I still have these fearful moments where I worry about what might happen to you if we do this.”

Her anger ebbed slightly as she listened to him. Like it or not, Tai was simply being reactionary, much in the same way her own thoughts had been in the wake of admitting the truth to herself. Only he had the extra pressure of knowing how she felt and the reality of them acting on their feelings to contend with. “Yes, you should be. This is the second time you’ve done it and if you do it again you’re going to regret it.”

“I’m really sorry, Kari,” he said again, still looking down at the sidewalk.

She reached out a hand and tilted his chin up and around until their eyes met. The sincerity she could see in those beautiful chocolate browns told her far more than his words ever could. She allowed her gaze to soften when she said, “I understand that this is really difficult for you and I think after the last five days, this morning has just been too much for you to process too soon. Unfortunately, we’re out of time or we’ll both be late.”

“Surely this takes precedence over school,” Tai replied, making no move to head off.

“It does,” Kari admitted, “but it’s going to take far longer to discuss than we can spend right now and if we both play hooky, mom will find out and that’ll mean too much unwanted attention.”

He scratched his chin, “I see your point.”

“Let’s go to school for now and I’ll come and meet you when you finish. Then we can go somewhere a little more private and talk some more.” She ran her palm down his cheek before adding, “and, Tai, try and have a think about what it is you want. Not what you think is best for me, what **you** want.”

“I will,” he promised and gave her a faint smile. “I suppose we’d better go our separate ways.”

Kari returned his smile with one of her own and nodded. “I’ll see you outside your school when it finishes.”

Resisting the urge to give him a goodbye Kiss, she watched him turn his bike around and head off in the opposite direction. Climbing onto her own, Kari embarked on the last leg of her trip to school alone. It had been a far more difficult morning so far than she had anticipated. And she could only hope it was not an omen of things to come.


	39. Pt3 12) A new machine - Part 2

**Part Three: Their Secret**

**Chapter Twelve: A new machine – Part 2 **

Once more Tai Kamiya found himself sitting in school with his mind dominated by only one thing; Kari. After their conversation that morning, he had been left feeling both stupid and afraid. Yet at the same time, with a maddening desire to hold his sister in his arms. To feel the softness of her lips against his own and to run his hands all over her smooth skin. However, it had been the first two that had occupied most of his time.

It had been downright idiotic to say, _“do you understand why I thought this might be a bad idea now?”_ to her. Not only had it suggested that he still thought of her as a child, but also that he had gone against his better judgement just to make her happy. While she had not commented directly on the latter, he knew full well it had not escaped her notice. Her suggestion that he should think about what **he** wanted, had said as much. That’s where the fear had come in.

Had you asked Tai yesterday what he would have wanted in regards to his sister, he would have said, without hesitation, a proper relationship. However, the events of this morning had thrown all that into question. Overnight, they had gone from being able to express their feelings openly, as they had been doing for five days straight, to keeping them shuttered up indoors. And at no point before sleep had taken him the previous night, had he ever imagined that it would become so difficult so quickly. As he’d sat there at the breakfast table, he had felt a burning resentment towards his parents for having come home. For sitting on either side of him and forming a metaphorical wall between himself and his sister.

Tai felt the scabs on his right wrist itch and it took him a great deal of effort not to reach over with his other hand and start to scratch at them. His day had dragged ever since he had left Kari that morning and even though he now sat in his final lesson, his mind had still not left his sister. Would his feelings settle down after a few days, once he got used to his parents being home? Would spending what time alone he could with his sister ease the pressure? Or would each subsequent time they were together only increase the problem? And what exactly did **he** want? So many questions… no answers.

The clock on the wall ticked by slowly as Tai desperately tried to find something, anything that might help him figure out what to do. Of his questions, he had so far only figured out one thing. The only one of them he could actually get a definitive answer for was the last one. For he alone could tell him what **he** wanted. Tai let out a mirthless laugh that somehow managed to go unnoticed by the teacher at the front of the room. The past five days had given him that answer; Kari. If she were anyone but his sister, he would not hesitate to start a relationship with her. Except she was his sister. Did he still have an issue with that fact..? No… if he did, kissing her would not feel so right. And it felt more right than anything else ever had. But what sort of relationship could they have? Everything they did would have to be hidden from everyone they knew. Not to mention that they might have a very limited amount of time together where they could be a couple. Would it even be enough to sustain a relationship? And if not, could they contain themselves?

Tai let out a sigh just as the end of day chime sounded. Rising from his seat when given leave to do so by the teacher, he quickly packed his bag and headed for the exit. Out in the quickly crowding hallways, he made his way to the nearest exit and across the school grounds to the bike racks. A few people tried to catch his attention en-route but he ignored them. Unlocking his bike, he wheeled it around and walked it to the main entrance. He saw on approach that Kari was already waiting for him; her green uniform standing out amidst the sea of light blue and grey. When he drew closer and got a proper look at her, his eyes were drawn to how her lit match hair glistened in the sunlight. Her smile, set below those perfect reddish-brown eyes, melted his heart the moment it formed on her lips. He had his answer now.

“Hey, Tai,” she said sweetly when he drew up beside her. “How was your day?”

“Hey, Kari,” he greeted with a smile, before answering, “my day was long. How about you?”

“Not much better. I had to bail on Yolei to come here and was subjected to the usual twenty questions plus another ten about whether it was because I felt depressed again,” she replied.

“I bet that was fun,” he said sarcastically, before asking, “so, any ideas about where we should go?”

“There’s a park not far from here. We should be able to find a relatively secluded spot where we won’t be heard or disturbed.”

“Sound’s good, lead the way.”

Kari flicked up the stand on her bike with her foot and started wheeling it through the crowd of milling students. He followed at her side as they walked the short journey in silence. When they reached the park, the siblings found a shaded spot beneath a tree that lay a good distance from the nearest groups of people. Resting their bikes against its thick trunk, they sat down on the ground.

“So,” Kari began, adjusting her position so she could look into his eyes, “have you thought about what **you** want?”

Tai met her gaze and nodded, “yes…”

“And?”

“…I want you,” he answered truthfully.

She reached out a hand and gripped his own, the light in her eyes brighter than that of twin suns. “So you want to be with me?”

Another nod, “yes.”

He felt a light squeeze as her eyes closed for a second and a smile spread from ear to ear. “I’m so happy to hear you say that.” Her expression then turned serious for a moment. “You understand that this won’t be easy… for either of us.”

“I know, but the thought of not being with you is far worse,” he admitted. It felt like part of the weight had lifted from his shoulders, now that he had expressed his wishes to her. “However, I’m worried about where we go from here.”

He watched Kari take a deep breath. “Ok, “ she said slowly, “that’s why we’re going to talk about it and try to figure out how we’re going to manage.”

“First things first, I think we need to get through the next few days,” Tai said, thinking it best to start with the most pressing issue. “If we can’t act ‘normal’ around mom and dad, we might as well let them in on our secret and they can forcibly keep us apart.”

His sister let out a macabre laugh at his suggestion. “They’d probably take us to a therapist to try and cure us of our incestuous feelings. However, I think we were just caught off guard this morning. Neither of us had realised the past five days had shifted the dynamic of our relationship to a point that suddenly closing the door on it was too much of a culture shock.”

“That’s certainly true, he agreed. “I suppose we’ll know tonight whether or not you are right.”

“If I am, then we should be able to cope. However, given that we won’t always know when we’ll next be able to spend time together, I suggest we employ my technique for getting through the days as opposed to yours.”

Tai knew without her saying it that she was referring to using music to temper their urges instead of a shard of glass. “What if you’re wrong?” he asked, dreading the answer.

“If I’m wrong, then we’re in trouble. However, I’m hoping we don’t have to cross that particular bridge.”

As expected, her words did little to reassure him. “Ok, so say we are able to keep a lid on things, how are we supposed to be together if we can’t be together?”

Kari sat with a ponderous expression on her face before she replied, “I suppose we’ll have to keep a close eye on mom and dad’s schedules so we know when we’ll have the apartment to ourselves. And plan things well in advance, including cover stories if we decide to go out.”

It felt slightly strange for Tai, to be the one asking all the questions. As the leader of the DigiDestined, he was used to being the one others turned to for answers. The only time he got to ask questions was when he needed information from Izzy and that typically only served to help him make the decisions. At the thought of his tech-savvy friend, a lightbulb turned itself on inside his head. He gave Kari a smile. “We can use the internet.”

His sister gave him a funny look, “I know we can, but how does that help?”

“Easy. If we can’t physically be together at home without arousing too much suspicion, we can sit and talk over the net without mom or dad ever finding out.”

Kari then returned his smile as she said, “that’s a great idea. If we can at least talk freely to one another it might make things slightly easier in the times between when we can be together.”

“Let’s give it a try tonight,” he replied decisively.

“I’ll lend you my CD box so you can copy them to your mp3 player. Only listen to Amarok at your own risk. It’ll probably still make your ears bleed first time around.”

They both started to laugh and Tai shifted over so he could put his arm over her shoulder. Kari responded by leaning her head against his chest. It was going to be difficult. They both recognised that fact. However, in that moment, neither cared for they had each other. The next hour that they would spend sitting under that tree, would be their first as a proper couple.


	40. Pt3 13) A momentary lapse of reason

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning! Like chapter four, this chapter too contains content of an explicit sexual nature. However, for those of you that find that sort of material uncomfortable to read, you can safely read the first two scenes before skipping ahead to the next chapter. For those of you that elect to stay, I’ll tell you that the chapter title this time around comes from that of Pink Floyd’s thirteenth album. And while I certainly did not plan this, I find it amusing that the title for this chapter of part three (number thirteen) and chapter four, were both named after the respective Pink Floyd albums. So without any more nonsense from me, lets get straight on with it.

**Part Three: Their secret**

**Chapter Thirteen: A momentary lapse of reason**

Kari Kamiya sat at her desk, pencil hovering over an empty page in her sketchbook. Every few moments her eyes would glance over at the clock on the outside screen of her flip phone. Only to find that it still said the exact same thing as the last time she had checked; 7:25 pm. Her palms felt sticky and every now and then her hand would shake slightly. She felt like a small child lying awake on Christmas Eve, excitedly awaiting seven am when she could go and open her presents. No… scratch that. Christmas presents were just things you wanted. This was something much deeper. A need that burned inside her so uncontrollably, that she just had to have it. No, she was not a small child waiting for Santa, she was a joansing drug addict craving their next fix.

Ever since she and Tai had gone to the park and decided to have a proper relationship, they had not had a single moment alone in the apartment. That had been nine days ago. Nine stinking days during which she had not been able to so much as sneak a kiss from her brother. It had been downright hell. They’d talked online almost every night from the confinements of their own bedrooms. Sharing personal thoughts, jokes and the occasional slice of naughty talk. However, they had eventually gotten so sick fed up of not being able to see one another, that once Tai had finished his homework on Wednesday, they’d gone to the sofa and beaten their frustrations out over an exceptionally brutal bout of Killer Instinct. Only even once their parents had gone to bed, they had dared not risk doing anything questionable. Perhaps if it had not been for the promise of tonight, they might have caved to lust. For after nine agonising days, their parents were finally going out for the evening.

Kari’s eyes flickered to her cell phone again; 7:26 pm. For fuck sake! In frustration, she pressed too hard on her pencil and the tip snapped. Cursing, she threw it down atop her sketchbook and shoved both towards the back of her desk. This was getting ridiculous. The party her parents were to attend was supposed to start at half-past seven and they hadn’t even left yet! Had no one ever told them that unpunctuality was the height of rudeness? She shook her head, adults these days. Her ear’s pricked up at the sound of footsteps in the hallway. Could this be… the bathroom door slammed shut and she threw her hands up into the air. ARGH! Teeth clenched her breaths came in laboured pants. She had a good mind to go and bodily throw them out the front door herself. Another check of the time revealed it to be 7:27 pm. And they weren’t even taking the car so they could both have a drink! If she were their host she’d have a good mind to refuse them admittance. She let out a chuckle and hoped that the relevant individual(s) would not be so ruthless. More footsteps.

“Ok, Kid’s, that’s us heading out,” her mother called from what sounded like the front door.

Kari almost did a backflip out of her desk chair. Finally!

##

(three minutes prior)

Tai lounged on the living room sofa as he mindlessly flicked through the channels. Every so often he would pull his phone from his pocket to check the time. Not only were his parents running late, but the delay was eating into the precious time he had to spend with his sister. It had been a difficult nine days, he mused. After making up his mind about what he wanted, it seemed the universe had conspired to deny him it at every opportunity. Not only had one of his parents been at home literally every single minute that he had, but a combination of homework and soccer practice had prevented him from meeting up with Kari after school or arranging to meet her in town last weekend. It had been torturous having to spend all those mornings and evenings sitting at the dinner table, talking about how his day had been or how the soccer team was doing or countless other bits of mind-numbing chit-chat, while his beautiful sister sat opposite him; agonisingly just out of reach. Indeed, had they not known since Monday that they would have the place to themselves this evening, he was not sure either of them could have contained themselves after their parents had gone to bed on Wednesday. However, they had agreed a week prior that kissing in the house, or anything else that would raise an unwanted eyebrow, had to remain off the table whenever their mom or dad was at home, even if both were asleep and they were holed up inside one of their own bedrooms.

Tai glanced over his shoulder at the sound of footsteps in the hallway and almost cried when he heard the bathroom door slam shut. You’ve both been in there for over half an hour each, he yelled internally! In irritation, he jabbed at the TV remote and changed the channel. He didn’t think he could take much more of this. After five days of bliss, he had been forced to endure nine days of frustration and torment. Nine days in which he had been unable to do more than share a parental friendly hug with Kari. His fingers began to drum in agitation on the arm of the sofa. This feeling was far worse, far more desperate than how he had felt when he had been waiting for the end of the school day so he could come home and cut himself. He glanced down at his now unbandage wrist. While his sister assured him that the cuts had healed well, he could still trace each and every line with a finger. If his parents didn’t leave soon… He heard the sound of the bathroom door opening and footsteps heading towards the front door.

“Ok, Kid’s, that’s us heading out,” his mother called out.

He turned his head towards the apartment door. “Ok, have fun,” he said, his butt creeping towards the edge of the sofa.

Wait for it, he told himself, feeling like it was track day at school at he was about to run a sprint. The seconds ticked by slowly until he eventually heard the click of the front door closing. Tai sprang to his feet, rushed over to the window and peered outside. While every fibre of his being wanted to vault the sofa and run straight to Kari’s room, common sense and forward planning told him to hang fire. He and his sister had talked about this online last night and agreed to wait until they were sure their parents had left the apartment building before doing anything. He waited with bated breath as his eyes scanned the street below for the sight of two figures emerging.

“Are they gone?” he heard Kari say as her soft footsteps became audible from down the hall.

“Not yet,” he said without turning around. The seconds ticked by and he felt his heart rate kick up a notch. Come on… come on… “YES!” he exclaimed when he saw his parents emerge from the front entrance to the apartment building. Turning, he caught sight of his sister in her Digital Punk jeans and vest. “They’re gone.”

##

Kari almost sprinted across the main living area as Tai darted away from the window. The fires that were their shared passion had been running hot all week and the confirmation that their parents had left and would not be back for several hours had been like a Nova Blast hitting the coals. The siblings came together in an embrace as their lips joined in a fiery kiss. In a zealous frenzy, their tongues interlocked and battled for supremacy.

Clamping one hand around the back of her brother’s head and the other firmly on his ass, Kari broke off the kiss, panting for breath. She felt Tai’s hands slide down her back as he too struggled to take in air. Reddish-brown eyes gazed deeply into chocolate ones for a few heartbeats before lips re-joined and the dual recommenced. When she felt her brother’s hands firmly squeeze her butt cheeks, she brought her arms together securely around his neck. In one fluid motion, she hoisted herself up off the ground and wrapped her legs around his waist.

Tai felt the weight of his sister in his hands and the strain on his neck and shoulders as she caught him off guard and monkey climbed up him. Quickly he readjusted his position in order to stop her falling, surrendering control of the kiss to her in the process. He felt her tongue reach into his mouth and explore each and every inch as her lips too took advantage of his momentary lapse of fight. The feeling of desire and the want, no need to have her almost completely overwhelmed him as he quickly started walking towards the hallway.

Kari felt her brother start to move but did not care. She just had to be close to him. To feel his warm body pressed up against her own. Relinquishing her hold on his lips, she reached around and started to kiss his neck. A few steps passed before she felt his warm breath cause the small hair on her own to stand on end. She moaned when his tongue ran across her skin and his lips planted themselves. A moment later she felt one of his hands leave her ass, followed by the sound of him fumbling with a door handle; she had no idea to what room.

Tai practically pushed his sister against the door to her own bedroom in order to open it and the two spilt across the threshold. He’d only picked her room by virtue of it being easier to get to whilst snogging her. After taking a few more steps he felt her disentangle her legs from around his waist and the strain on his neck ease. At the same time they ceased kissing each other’s necks and took a step backwards. Lust filled reddish-brown eyes stared into his own hungry ones as he devoured the image of his sister. Lit match hair framed her perfect face and her sleek body looked purely divine. Without hesitating, Tai tore off his shirt and hauled his t-shirt up over his head.

Kari almost lost herself in the beauty of her brother’s big chocolate brown eyes. She could see a desire in them that matched how she felt inside. Grabbing the bottom of her vest she pulled it up over her shoulders and discarded it to the floor. Tai had done the same and when her eyes fell upon that well-defined torso, she reached behind her back and fumbled with the clasp on her black bra. There was no hesitation, no pause to consider whether this was right or not. Just an overwhelming fire of desire that almost burned her from the inside out, it felt that hot.

Tai’s eyes widened when his sister’s bra fell away from her chest to reveal her small breasts. They had not talked about this and he knew he should stop her to make sure that she wanted to do this, but lust overcame him and instead he stepped forward and wrapped his arms around her bare back. The soft skin of her breasts pressed against his torso and he immediately felt an erection form inside his pants. His lips found hers once more and he immediately took control of the kiss. He ran his tongue along her bottom lip and back over her top before slipping it inside her mouth. She tasted so sweet… so wonderful that it made her homemade churros seem sour by comparison.

The sensation of their naked torso’s rubbing against each other almost caused Kari to drown in a wave of bliss. Her fingers began to caress her brother’s back and she pushed him back towards the edge of her bed. She could feel a slight stickiness between her legs when she moved. When his tongue penetrated her mouth she let out a low moan around it.

When the backs of his legs hit the edge of his sister’s bed, Tai sat down and pulled her with him. In one quick movement, he brought her down on top of himself and then used the momentum to roll her over onto her back. She gazed up into his eyes and gave him a wicked smile. In a flash her hands had reached up and her fingers lightly rubbed his nipples. He let out a moan as he felt a small jolt of pleasure rush through him. “So that’s how you’re going to play is IT!” the last word came out as his sister drew a second moan from his body.

“Be nice or I might start to play rough,” Kari teased in a seductive voice as she released her grip on his nipples. She snaked one of her hands around the back of his head and pulled it downwards as her lips rose to meet his. The other remained between them and she started to run her index finger around his now erect left nipple. When he lowered himself down she could feel the bulge of his erection rub up against her groin and it elicited a warm fuzzy sensation in her nether region. She wanted him to touch her… needed him to touch her. And he did not disappoint.

Tai rubbed his hands over the smooth skin of his sister’s naval and slowly moved them upwards. Drifting them outwards, he cupped Kari’s small breasts. It felt so good, so right to finally be able to hold them. Gently, he rubbed them and caused her to groan. With his index fingers, he started to draw circles around her nipples and watched them harden. He watched the expression of longing morph into one of delight as he lightly pinched his thumbs and forefingers together.

“Urgh!” Kari exclaimed as a sensation akin to twin bolts of lightning striking her coursed through her body. Having her brother play with her breasts in the flesh felt so fantastic that it blew all daydreams she’d had out of the water. Except she wanted more. Beneath the pressure of his erection she could feel her clitoris ache to join the party. However, this was not just about her, Tai deserved to enjoy himself too. When the wave of pleasure subsided enough that she could think straight, she pulled him down atop her and forcibly rolled them over. Now on top, she used his moment of surprise to descend upon his neck with her lips, her fingers finding his nipples once more.

“Mrgh,” Tai cried as his sister started to plant kisses on his neck and traced her way southward. Soon he felt her lips brush up against his right nipple. “Kari, don’t you… ARGH!” he exclaimed as she gave it a few quick licks and then sucked. When the pleasure subsided enough for him to see straight, he fumbled about with his hands until he cupped her breast. “Two can play at that game,” he said as he squeezed them both.

Kari relinquished her grip on her brother’s nipple and let out an elongated, “UHHH!” The sensation of having both her breasts groped in such a firm grip almost turned her to putty in his hands. She shuddered uncontrollably and could do nothing to stop Tai from sliding himself down the bed slightly. Her eyes glanced down her own cleavage and she saw her left breast hang with the nipple just above his mouth. Helpless, she could only watch his tongue extend and give it a long lick. Her arms quivered as he ran circles around her erect teat before taking it in his mouth and sucking. “HUH!” she moaned as her back arched and her limbs turned to jelly.

Tai felt his sister’s arms give way and he immediately caught her by the waist to help support her. Seizing the initiative he rolled her over so that he was on top once more. His penis throbbed in his pants and he wanted nothing more than to free it from his jeans and put it to good use. Yet something, some small shred of sense in the dark recesses of his brain, managed to make itself heard over the overwhelming feelings of lust and desire and told him to stay his hand… for now. Instead, he pressed himself against his sister once more with a slight thrust.

Now on her back and with her brother’s assault on her breasts having ceased, Kari managed to regain a shred of composure. She felt him rub up against her, this time with slightly more force and it sent a small shockwave through her clitoris. Her hard-fought equanimity almost shattered and sent her crashing back against the rocks of pleasure, but somehow she managed to hold on. Wrapping her arms back around Tai’s back, she pulled him towards her and seized his bottom lip with her teeth. The motion caused him to thrust against her again and she felt him quiver in her grasp. “URGH, Tai, just take me now!” she screamed as this time she hit the rocks.

On hearing his sister’s cry, he lifted her up just enough so that he could envelop her with his arms and ground his hips against her once more. “UHHH!” Tai shouted out as he felt a large surge of pleasure from his penis. His eyes met with hers and he knew they shared the same longing. However, with great difficulty, he uttered, “let’s try this first.” She nodded in reply.

When Tai next thrust, Kari wrapped her legs around his ass and bucked her hips. Lips interlocking in passionate kisses, the siblings continued to thrust together. Both letting out stray moans whenever they had to break off a kiss in order to suck in a much-needed breath of air. Soon he began to feel a pressure building up inside his penis as the intervals between pleasure waves began to quickly decrease. For her, it was more akin to a vibration increasing in intensity as jolt upon jolt built her up towards a climax.

“Kari… I’m going to pop,” Tai yelled as he forced his hips to kick the pace up one more notch.

“Tai… don’t STOP,” Kari bellowed when she felt him up the tempo once more for a final push. “ARGH, TAI!” Her orgasm crashed down upon her and she felt all of her muscles tense like she never had before.

Tai felt his sister's legs turn into a steel vice around his waist as with one final push the pressure cooker that was his penis blew its lid. “URGH, KARI!” he roared as his own pleasure reached its climax and he descended into the thralls of orgasm.

For a brief moment, the siblings remained locked like statues as their bliss wracked bodies convulsed together. Slowly the tension began to ebb and they both flopped back down atop the mattress, with Tai limply rolling off of Kari so that they both lay side by side. Exhausted looks of sheer ecstasy were smeared across both of their faces as two pairs of glazed eyes stared through the ceiling and into nirvana.


	41. Pt3 14) Breathe in the air

**Part Three: Their Secret**

**Chapter Fourteen: Breathe in the air**

Kari looked up at the white ceiling, not quite sure of what exactly had just happened. However, what she did know is that it had been incredible. The sheer raw passion that she had just shared with her brother could not be compared to anything she had ever before experienced. All her limbs felt floppy and her cheeks felt as though someone had set them ablaze. Consciously she took in a much needed long breath of air. That had been… intense. Eventually, she managed to get a signal through to her right hand and got it to move. She had to rub at her leg to confirm that she had not lost her jeans at some point during the fray. Would it have mattered if she had? She could certainly remember yelling to Tai just to take her there and then. Maybe it was for the best that her brother had managed to salvage some measure of restraint, for she had certainly lost hers.

Eventually, Kari managed to roll over, her arm flopping over her brother’s bare chest. That part she did not regret. How could she after it had felt so good to finally have her brother play with her breasts? Beneath her hand, she could feel Tai’s chest slowly rise and fall as his breathing regulated. He turned his head to look at her, smiled, then reached out with his lips and planted a soft kiss on her own.

“That was unbelievable,” he said, summing up exactly how she felt with just a single word.

“Tell me about it,” Kari replied as she returned his smile. “I don’t think my hearts quite finished racing yet.”

Tai chuckled as he grinned at her, “mine too.”

“What the hell just happened to us?” she asked as she nestled her head against his chest.

Her brother responded by wrapping his arm around her shoulders. “I think nine day’s cold turkey took its toll and we snapped.” There was a brief moment of silence before he then queried, “are you ok with what we just did. I mean we didn’t so much as just hit second base, rather blew through it like a bullet train.”

Kari nodded her head, “I’m good.”

“Are you sure? We didn’t even talk about doing half of what we just did…” his voice suddenly became concerned, “Kari I’m so sorry if I just took advantage of you.”

She heard his words and had to restrain herself from bursting out laughing. Typical Tai, always honourable and trying to protect her… The devilish grin spread across her face and it was just a pity that her brother could not see her face. “Tai,” she said sternly, “what did I tell you about doing the whole overprotective big brother thing.”

She physically felt him gulp before he blurted out, “Kari, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that.”

“Hmph,” she pouted, “I recall saying that you would be sorry if you did it again, so you’re going to have to be punished.”

Before he could protest, she found his right nipple with her mouth.

“Wait... KARI!” he yelled when she bit down on it with her teeth. “Oww, that hurt!”

She let go and started to laugh. “I did warn you not to do it again. And no, you did not just take advantage of your poor, helpless little sister.” She sat up slightly to look him in the eyes. “In fact, you were the one who actually managed some restraint as I recall yelling for you to take me.”

The sour look on his face disappeared as she spoke and he seemed genuinely relieved. “And no, I do not regret taking off my bra and letting you have your wicked way with my boobs.” She took one of his hands in her own and placed it on her right breast as though to emphasise the point.

He opened his mouth and said, “are…” but another stern look from her quickly stopped him finishing the sentence.

She flashed him an evil grin, “don’t make me punish you again.”

“That was just mean,” he pouted, rubbing his own nipple with his free hand. “I still think we should talk about this.”

“Agreed. We completely lost control this evening and were hurtling down the track to a home run if you hadn’t had the sense to keep your pants on.”

A grimace spread across Tai’s face as he pulled himself into a sitting position. “Yeah… about my pants…” he rubbed a hand behind his head and shuddered, “…I think I need to change.”

Kari burst out laughing at how embarrassed he looked and decided to throw him a bone, given that his had probably buried itself by now. “News flash, Bro. Men are not the only ones who make a mess of their underwear when they get too frisky.” She gave him a quick kiss before adding, “let’s clean ourselves up and then meet back on the sofa.”

“Deal,” Tai replied and climbed off of her bed. “I’m calling first dibs on the bathroom.”

Kari smiled at him and followed suit. “It’s all yours,” she said and watched him pick up his upper body attire before he left her bedroom.

She looked at herself, topless as she was, in the mirror and could see that her cheeks still held an after orgasm glow and that a thin smile continued to play on her lips. Her hair stuck up at odd angles with her bangs now plastered to her forehead. Her entire body felt sticky with sweat and she was starting to cool. When Tai left the bathroom, she intended to take a well-earned shower before hitting the sofa. However, in the silence of her bedroom, she could hear the sound of running water and deduced that her brother had made the exact same decision. She had to wait a further ten minutes for him to vacate the premises.

After enjoying a thoroughly relaxing shower, Kari changed into a pair of green Japanese silk pyjama trousers and collarless jacket with toggle fasteners. They had been a gift from her grandmother and were ridiculously comfortable. Exiting her bedroom, she crossed the main living area and joined her brother on the sofa.

“I don’t know about you, but I’m starving,” Tai said when she sat down. He’d pulled on a pair of black pyjama shorts and a grey t-shirt.

“You’re always starving,” Kari replied as she snuggled up beside him. “Hi,” she then said cutely, “remember me?”

Her brother paused in mock contemplation, “aren’t you that girl from four nights ago?”

She playfully pursed her lips, “what girl from four nights ago?”

“Wait you’re not Mimi!” he declared in feigned horror as he allowed his mouth to hang open.

“You’re darn right I’m not Mimi, Tai Kamiya,” she said indignantly as she gave him an evil grin. “And you’d better not even think about falling her feminine wiles when she gets back from the US or you really won’t like your next punishment.” She reached out and nibbled on his earlobe in much the same way as she had the first night they had made out. “You belong to me!”

“Let me guess,” he said after letting out a slight wince, “marking your territory?”

She smiled at him, “clever boy.”

“Are you going to do that after every base we pass?”

Kari thought for a moment, “unless you’d be willing to get a tattoo that says, ‘property of Kari Kamiya’.”

Tai scowled at her. “Why don’t we tattoo your skin.”

“I would, but mom won’t let me. And I think if I did and she found out, she’d probably think I’d joined the Yakuza and haul me to have it lasered off.”

His mouth hung agape as though she had just suggested something sacrilegious.

“Geeze, Bro, don’t you blow a fuse too,” she said, slightly surprised by his reaction. “I thought you were fully supportive of the new me?”

“I am,” Tai answered quickly. “It’s just…” he paused and she could tell he was searching for some way to either not offend her or avoid sounding like the overprotective big brother, “…you have such beautiful skin. Why would you possibly want to spoil something so perfect?”

Ok, so maybe she had not quite read his response correctly. She didn’t quite know how to reply to that sort of comment. He thought her skin was beautiful and perfect, who knew? Eventually, realising that she would have to say something, said, “ok, how about I don’t run off and get a tattoo without consulting with you first?”

Her brother let out a sigh of relief, “I still reserve the right to try and talk you out of it in a non-overprotective big brother manner.”

She gave him a smile and started to laugh. “It looks like I can train you after all. Now be a good boy and go fetch me a soda once you’ve ordered that pizza that you’re thinking about. And make sure half of it is something that I’ll eat.”

“How on earth did you know I was thinking about pizza?”

“Because I know you, Tai Kamiya. After every soccer game you’ve ever played, you and your teammates have always gone for pizza. And I know fine well I just gave you every bit as hard a workout,” Kari replied with a grin.

She could see the gears in his head turn as he worked through her logic. “Hmm,” he said as his head moved from side to side in a makes sense sort of way. Removing herself from his chest, she watched as her brother stood up and made his way over to the house phone. Her eyes glanced up at the living room clock; 9:05 pm. They probably had about three hours that they could safely bare their emotions before they would have to be shut away again. It sucked, royally, but they had no other choice. However, as they had just found out, having to wait nine days before they could let them out had caused them to lose control. What if the next wait was even longer? Their parents were not exactly ‘life of the party’ people.

“Here, your Majesty,” Tai then said with a chuckle as he handed her a can of soda.

She looked at the can then up at him with a disapproving expression. “Where’s the glass and ice?” she said with an air of mock displeasure.

“In the kitchen,” he replied with a grin. “Get off your lazy butt and get it yourself if you want it.”

They both burst out laughing as he sat down and Kari quickly lay back and put her head in his lap. She gazed up into those beautiful chocolate eyes. Her brother was so adorable it almost made her burst. They sat in silence for a few moments before he asked, “so what are we going to do to prevent another night like tonight? I know we both really enjoyed it, but if we lose control like that again, I’m worried about where it might lead.”

“It’ll lead to us having sex before either of us are ready and possibly worse if we don’t bother to find protection,” Kari replied flatly. There was little point beating about the bush, she thought. They were both thinking it.

“So you agree that we’re not ready for that yet,” Tai said as he looked down at her.

They’d already discussed this he previous week, but like her brother, she felt reassured by the fact that they were both talking about things so openly and were still on the same page. After all, communication was a cornerstone of any relationship that hoped to last. “Yes,” she answered definitively. “If we end up having sex before we’re ready, we’ll both regret it and I think it will ruin something special.”

“Like a hot air balloon, we need to find a way of letting some of the air escape before we explode again,” Tai then said.

Kari pondered for a moment. She had an idea but was worried it would make her brother feel too uncomfortable. However, with nothing else coming to mind she decided to broach it, “there is something we could do, but it would all depend on how you feel…”

“…we spend time as a couple out with the house,” he said, clearly having had the same idea.

She nodded, “how do you feel about that? I know you wanted to keep things within the apartment, to begin with.”

“I know,” Tai admitted, “but that was before we realised just how difficult it would be to stuff the genie back in the bottle once it had been let loose. And mom and dad don’t exactly have the busiest of social calendars… I don’t think we have any other choice.”

Kari took hold of one of his hands and gave it a reassuring squeeze. “It’ll be ok. So long as we’re careful and make plans in advance, everything will be fine.”

He smiled and nodded at her. “Yeah. There’s no reason that we can’t make this work.”

“Exactly,” she said with a grin. “So with that in mind… I want a date.”

Her brother shook his head and started to laugh. “If I didn’t know better, I’d say you just manipulated this entire situation.”

“No,” she replied with a hint of mischief, “but I’m more than happy to take advantage of it.”

“Ok,” Tai sighed in a resigned manner, “what do you want to do and when?”

The second question was easy to answer, “we’d probably be best to plan it for next weekend. Otherwise, we might end up having to go fourteen days cold turkey.” As for the what… “how about going to see a movie? It’s fairly innocuous and should allow us to acclimatise to being outside as a couple without becoming paranoid that everyone is watching us.”

“That sounds perfect,” her brother said in agreement, “however, one condition…”

“Which is?”

“…no chick film.”

They both laughed and Kari could not help but recall that it had been her own insistence on the same condition that had helped to set this entire thing in motion six weeks prior. It had been a gruelling nine days but they had come through it and, somehow, managed to avoid getting burnt in the process. Now they were sitting together and planning their first date. She could not remember a time in her life when she had felt happier, than when she had been spending time alone with her brother since that fateful Friday night where she’d tried to shut herself away in her bedroom. And more than anything she had ever wished for in her entire life, Kari wished that it would never end.


	42. Pt3 15) Learning to fly

**Part Three: Their Secret**

**Chapter Fifteen: Learning to fly**

In comparison to the previous nine, these past six days had been far more manageable for Tai Kamiya. Having let off more steam than a hundred boiling kettles the previous Saturday, the pressure inside the nuclear reactor that was he and his sister’s new relationship had dropped back below the warning level without blowing the top off. Now aware of the serious danger they faced, should it climb to high, the siblings had made a concentrated effort to avoid that eventuality. With some forward planning, they had met up after school on Wednesday and gone for a walk in the park for an hour before heading home. While they had kept everything parental friendly, or PF as they had dubbed it, just being alone together for that short space of time had been enough to ease the tension in between last Saturday’s hormone explosion and today’s planned first date. Although that did not mean that their time apart had been easy, it hadn’t, just more manageable.

They’d talked about today all week over the net and in the end, decided that the best way to keep it a secret was not to. Since they were only going to see a movie, it made little sense to hide it from their parents. For it was something they had done before when they were younger. All it had taken was a quick explanation that their respective friends were busy this weekend and that neither of them currently had a partner for their mom to tell them to have fun. Tai had also had a soccer game that afternoon so they had left the apartment together and headed for the Odaiba High School playing fields. Kari had wished him luck as he’d gone off to the changing rooms and she the stands. It had worked a treat, for he had scored two goals as his team won 5-2. Afterwards, his teammates had been bummed out that he was not going with them for a celebratory pizza, but he’d expected that.

Now freshly showered and dressed in clean jeans and a blue shirt, Tai walked beside his sister as they made their way towards the train station. They had decided to go to a cinema in Minato city instead of the local one in Odaiba, just to give them a little more privacy. In hindsight, it had been a good idea for he already felt slightly nervous. His eyes darted from face to face, scanning the late afternoon crowd for any sign of someone they knew. It’s just a movie, he kept telling himself. All I am doing is going to see a movie with my… Oh God, I’m actually taking my sister out on a date. Maybe this had been a mistake… Yes. They could go home now and…

“Tai,” Kari said softly from beside him, “relax.” Her soothing voice cut through his rising panic with ease and the moment he felt her slender hand touch his own, it began to dissipate. “Your back’s straighter than a steel girder.

“Sorry,” he said as he let out a long, slow breath. “I think my mind fell victim to any doubts I’ve had about this.”

“About whether it’s right or sensible? What if we’re seen by someone we know?” He nodded and she gave him a smile. “You’re not alone, I’ve had them too. I was a nervous wreck for about ten minutes when sitting in the stands earlier.”

He gave his sister a sideways glance. “You look the epitome of calm now, how did you deal with it?”

She laughed. “You scored your second goal and the entire stand erupted. By the time I’d settled down, I’d completely forgotten about my nerves.”

“You’ve got to admit, it was a pretty epic strike,” he replied with a chuckle.

“Shall I go home and let you and your ego have some alone time?” she asked and gave him a playful punch in the arm.

“I don’t recall my ego ever making me feel this nervous,” he conceded.

Kari shot him a look of mock offence. “Then why don’t you let it recreate the moment of your epic strike and you can go live there for the next half-hour.”

He thought about her suggestion for a moment. “You know, that might just work.” Tai felt a second blow to his arm, only this one contained a noticeable increase in force. “Oww, what was that for?”

“We haven’t even got on the train yet and already you’re ditching me and for your own ego no less!” While Kari kept her tone playful, there was a slight undertone that when combined with the second punch, told him that she was not messing around. She may have been in love with him, but the intent was clear. There would be no family discount when it came to meeting her high standards for a date or indeed a relationship in general. Either he would make the grade or it would go no further.

“Sorry, Kari,” he said apologetically. Swallowing a lump in his throat, he looked down at her hand. He could do this, he told himself. After all, courage was his strongest trait. Tentatively he reached out and took her slender hand in his own. He let out a small breath and felt a soothing calm flow from his sister and wash over him. “I promise I won’t retreat inside my own head and leave you dragging a zombie around for the rest of the day.”

She gave him a soft smile, “it’s ok for you to be nervous. And I don’t mind if we take things slowly, so long as you talk to me. Now, tell me all about that epic goal.”

Tai gave her a grin and launched into a full-blown explanation as they walked the remainder of the way to the train station. It transpired that Kari had been right, allowing his ego to recreate the moment did help to settle him. When they reached the station, he bought them tickets and they headed for the platform; still holding hands. Their timing had been good so they only had a short five-minute wait for the train to arrive. They found seats together and enjoyed the beautiful view of the harbour and Tokyo bay as they crossed the rainbow bridge. By the time they disembarked at Shiodome station, he felt much more at ease. The chances of bumping into anyone they knew here would be far lower than if they had remained in Odaiba.

Hand in hand, the siblings walked through the busy crowds of complete strangers and Tai found himself focusing on them far less. So much so that by the time they reached the cinema complex, Kari had his undivided attention. They tossed a coin to see who got to pick the film, which he lost. However, his sister ‘used the force’ to determine what film he wanted to see and so picked that; a last-chance showing of Star Wars Episode III. Once they had bought tickets and were heading to the snack counter, he gave her a sideways look.

“You knew that I’d missed this film back in the summer and that it was going to be shown here tonight, didn’t you,” he said when they joined onto the end of the queue.

Kari looked up at him with a grin, “are you insinuating that I purposefully chose this venue and this night for our date, just so I could make you happy? That would just be fiendishly devious of me.”

“Something that I would not put past you,” he said with a laugh, just as his stomach let out a ravenous growl. A reminder that he had not eaten since before his soccer match.

“Awww, you’re hungry,” his sister said in what sounded like genuine concern.

“Well, I haven’t eat…”

“Not you,” Kari cut him off as she cupped a hand to her ear and directed it towards his stomach, just as it rumbled again. “What do you mean he hasn’t fed you since before that soccer match?” His sister looked up at him and said in mock outrage, “Tai, how could you be so careless as to not feed your stomach something after that gruelling game?”

He couldn’t help but laugh at her antics. “Because you dragged me away before I could go and have my share of the team's celebratory pizza.”

“Then I guess I’ll just have to buy it a large hotdog until such a time as we can take it somewhere to get it a proper meal.”

His stomach let out a low purring sort of noise, apparently, it understood her. They reached the front of the queue and true to her word, Kari bought him a large hotdog, a soda each and a large bucket of salted popcorn for them to share. Thank god for Americanisation he thought as he ripped the top off of the hotdog in one large bite. While it did not compare in size to the bratwurst he had shared on his date with Teiko, it would tide him over until after the film. Taking a drink from his soda, he followed his sister through the mingling crowd and into the sparsely populated theatre; no surprise given that most people would have seen the film during its normal release window. They picked seats at the back and settled down to watch the trailers.

When he had finished his hotdog, he felt Kari tap him on the arm. Turning to look at her, she gave him a smile and threw a small handful of popcorn at him; managing to get a piece into his mouth. He chewed down on it and laughed silently. Everything between them just felt so relaxed now, natural even. Unlike any of his previous dates. During any of those, he’d always felt slightly uneasy, as though his girlfriends expected him to act in a certain way or were waiting for him to do something he was unaware he was supposed to. And he’d certainly never had one of them playfully toss popcorn at him. It was like Kari got him in a way that none of the others, with the exception of Teiko, had. Maybe it had something to do with her having sixteen years’ worth of Tai Kamiya experience, or perhaps they were just a perfect fit for one another. Did it really matter? For it was her sat beside him, not any of the others. And around his sister, he just had to be himself.

##

The house lights came on as the end credits began to roll and Kari found that her eyes had already wandered from the screen to stare at her brother. Ever since they had got off the train, the whole evening had just felt so right. Unlike any of her dates with TK or Davis, there had been no voice in the back of her head telling her that it was a sham. That she was simply leading the respective boy along in order to try and quell her own feelings. No, her mind had been quiet, at peace. This date with her brother had been free from the taint that had smeared all the others. It had been pure. Just him and her.

She watched as he turned his head to face her. “Ready to go?” he asked with a smile.

“That depends on where you’re taking me,” she replied. “I don’t think I’m ready to go home yet.” She giggled when his stomach growled, “I don’t think your stomach is quite ready to go home either.”

“I think it might consume both of us if we even try. How about we go get some noodles?”

“Sounds good,” Kari said and rose from her chair. “However, before we do, promise me one thing.”

“What is it?” he asked curiously.

“Promise that you’ll never betray yourself and turn to the dark side, just to try and save me.”

He laughed, “did the film actually get to you?”

“A little,” she conceded. “I’ve found you tend not to view these things in quite the same way after you’ve been involved in a real fight between good and evil. And no matter what we do, we’ll always be two of the chosen DigiDestined. While I try not to think about it, the prospect that we might someday have to fight another battle is very real.”

Tai sighed, “I know what you mean. I’d love to see Agumon again, but I know that if I do, it will probably mean we have to face off against some other evil.”

“Hence why I want you to promise me that no matter what, you’ll never betray who you are to try and save me,” Kari reiterated, giving him a look that conveyed that she was serious. “I’d rather die, than live knowing that you were no longer the person I’d fallen in love with.”

Tai looked into her eyes and she could see that he was sincere when he said, “I promise. However, you have to do the same. Because I couldn’t bear it if you ever lost yourself.”

“I promise,” she said and held out a hand to him, “shall we?”

Tai took the offered hand and got to his feet. “Lets.”

They sidled out of the row and walked together down the stairs. Leaving the now empty theatre, they crossed the foyer and received a, “have a nice night,” from one of the attendants on their way out of the front doors. Outside, the sun had shifted towards the horizon and a cool breeze swept through the busy street. Allowing Tai to lead her by the hand, Kari followed him through the crowd. Where it transpired that he himself was taking directions from his stomach, which had apparently taken note of a good smelling noodle bar en-route from the station. Sure enough, after travelling only a few blocks back the way they had come, her brother pointed at a building up ahead with a bright green and red neon sign.

“See, I told you my stomach knew where it was going,” he said as he guided her along the street.

Kari laughed, “if it’s hungry enough, I’d trust your stomach over GPS any day.”

He joined in as they made their way inside the shop. A single whiff of the aroma pouring forth was enough to convince her that the food would be good.

A young waitress came forward and addressed Tai, “table for two, Sir?”

He nodded, “yes, please.”

The woman picked up two menus from a neat stack and led them over to a quiet booth in the back. Ushering them to sit, she handed one to her brother and then turned to look at her. “I love your hair,” she said with a huge smile and held the menu out. “You look really pretty.”

“Thanks,” Kari replied, taking it from her outstretched hand.

“I bet your boyfriend is so lucky to have you.”

The comment caught her off guard and she could feel her cheeks begin to burn. A glance across the table told her that Tai too had been unprepared for it, his face having gone similarly red. Knowing she had to say something, Kari quickly blurted out, “I think I’m the lucky one.”

The waitress surveyed her brother and tilted her head. “You are quite cute and you certainly look like you work out a lot. I bet that bod of yours is smoking hot.”

Kari had to stifle a laugh as she watched his cheeks turn from light red to scarlet. It looked like he could add this girl to the long list of woman who’d made him uncomfortable.

“I suppose the two of you balance each other out. And you certainly make for a cute couple.” She then winked at them and said, “I’ll give you some alone time then come back and take your order,” before wandering away.

There was an awkward silence for a moment as Kari looked at her brother, both of their cheeks positively glowing like the red in the shop's sign. Their eyes met and she could feel the corners of her lips begin to tremble. Next second they both started laughing hysterically, drawing strange looks from the occupants of the nearest tables.

“Oh my god, I was so unprepared for that!” Kari exclaimed when she could eventually form words.

“It was like talking to Teiko, she was so forward,” Tai replied with a grin.

“I’ve thought so much about a first date between us and about how other people would react

\+ However, I guess my brain just assumed that every stranger would automatically know our secret and would treat us like we’re degenerates,” she said, saying exactly what was on her mind.

Tai nodded in agreement. “I know what you mean. Back in Odaiba, I was so uptight about people looking at us for the exact same reason. But the truth of the matter is, we look just like any other couple.”

While the closest individuals were at least a table away, they both kept their voices low while discussing **the** subject. “I guess it’ll take some time getting used to the idea that away from people that know us, we are just any other couple.”

“I suppose I never really thought about it, but there isn’t actually anything that gives it away,” Tai said and gave her a smile. “I mean we don’t really look alike. My eyes are chocolate coloured, whereas yours have this beautiful red tinge to them. And even when your hair doesn’t look like a lit match, it’s still a shade lighter than mine.”

“I look like mom, you look like dad. The gene pool at least dished us a decent hand in that department,” Kari said by way of a final remark on the subject. “Now let’s get some noodles and enjoy ourselves.”

“Before my stomach decides to rebel,” her brother added.

They only had time for a quick peruse of the menu before the bubbly waitress returned to take their order. She ordered a regular bowl of vegetable ramen while Tai opted for a large bowl of katsu chicken ramen with satay sauce and a side order of duck filled gyoza dumplings, which were apparently to share; yeah right. When the food arrived they sat and talked about random… stuff. Just common, everyday conversation that they or any other couple would normally share. They’d laughed, joked and enjoyed being in each other’s company without any fear of what the people around them might be thinking. For Kari, it had been the fulfilment of a two-year dream and not even when her imagination had run wild, had she been able to truly capture the feelings of joy, love and freedom that she currently felt.

When her brother had finally managed to swallow the last dumpling, after both a second and third wind, they had paid for their meal and left the noodle shop. Holding hands once more, the siblings walked quietly through the steadily thinning crowds towards the train station. More by luck than planning this time, they found that it would only be ten minutes until the next train to Odaiba. When it arrived (bang on time of course) they boarded and sat down facing the window.

By the time they reached the rainbow bridge, Kari had slumped sideways to rest her head against her brother’s shoulder. If she had been capable of thinking about their apprehensions from earlier in the day, both Tai’s response of wrapping his arm around her and the fact she had even done it in the first place, would have come as a huge surprise. However, at the moment, they were not siblings, they were boyfriend and girlfriend and nothing felt more natural. In the comfort of her brother’s embrace, Kari closed her eyes and acknowledged nothing other than the feel of his touch and the smell of his scent; fresh grass and honey with hints of lavender from their mom’s fabric softener.

“Wake up sleepy head, it’s our stop next,” she heard Tai say with a light chuckle.

“I’m not asleep, just enjoying the moment,” she replied, but nevertheless opened her eyes and sat up; albeit grudgingly. Why could she not exist within his embrace forever?

The train came to a stop and they disembarked. However, before they left the platform, Tai took her aside from the crowd. With a finger, he tilted her chin up so that she stared into his beautiful chocolate yes. Without saying a word, he moved his lips towards her own and gave her a delicate kiss.

“Tai what if…”

“…Shhh,” he said softly and kissed her again.

Kari closed her eyes and savoured each and every aspect of it. From the tender nature of his movements, to the subtle mix of salty and sweet on his lips from the satay sauce he’d eaten. When she was with Tai she felt like a bird soaring high above the clouds.

“I had a really good time tonight,” he then said when eventually they broke apart. “And I wanted to do this now, in case I lose my nerve by the time we get home.”

“It’s been magical,” Kari replied, unsure how else to sum up the evening. She then felt a sheet of regret soak into her metaphorical feathers like icy rain, causing her to utter, “I just wish we didn’t have to return to sibling mode.”

“I know,” he said taking her hands in his, “but if we want to have these moments as a couple, we need to act like brother and sister when at home or around people we know.”

She nodded glumly. Only in that moment did the realisation truly kick in that, no matter how high they soared while alone, they would always have to return to the ground. For no birds could perpetually remain airborne. A sudden torrent of sadness and despondency, the first she had properly felt since she learned of his secret, overcame Kari. The last six days, while slightly easier than the previous nine, had still been agonising for her. To have Tai so close for such long periods but not be able to touch him had been torturous. Her happy state soon became caught in this tidal wave of negativity and was soon smashed to pieces against the rocks of worry and doubt. Against her will, tears began to stream down Kari’s cheeks and she buried her head into her brother’s chest. “It’s not fair!” she wailed, letting out all her feelings of frustration and anger at their unfortunate lot in life.

She felt Tai wrap his strong arms around her and a sense of being safe and secure started to fight against the torrent of negativity. “I know it’s not fair,” he soothed, gently rubbing her back, “but there is nothing we can do about it at present. We have to keep it a secret.”

How long it took for her to calm down, Kari did not know. When eventually her tears stopped and she could bear to be out with the safety of her brother’s embrace, she felt pathetic… pathetic and weak. It had only been one date, yet here she was pouring her heart out and bemoaning that they would soon have to return to ‘normal’. She had been so sure that this was what she wanted and that she was prepared to endure the hardships. However, now, for the first time since they had started having this relationship, she genuinely wondered if the whole thing had been a mistake. Despite all the highs that she might experience while soaring through the clouds, did they outweigh the cold, hard, long lows that awaited her back on the ground? Lows that would only worsen with time. For the higher she flew, the further she would fall. All of a sudden she found herself unable to answer that question.

Once she eventually had her breathing under control, Kari mumbled, in a quiet deflated tone, “I want to go home.” Her gaze rooted upon her miss-matched converse, as she could not bear to look her brother in the eyes.

“Ok,” Tai replied as he put an arm around her.

The moment he touched her, Kari felt herself tense and a sense of panic begin to rise from deep within and she found that she could not cope. With an almost violent jerk, like that of a rabbit caught in a snare, she tried to shrug him off. In desperation, she cried, “please, Tai, don’t touch me just now.”

Kari felt her brother retract his arm and take a step away from her. A mixture of hurt and confusion laced his voice when he again answered, “ok.”

Lacking the mental capacity to properly assess and process the situation, her primal fight or flight instincts kicked in and she ran. Darting through the crowd, she did not even stop to see if Tai had followed. Emotions feeling rawer than they ever had, all Kari knew was that she needed to get back within the walls of her sanctuary. To return to the safety of her room where she could calm down and try and sort through the plane wreck that was her mind. Perhaps it had been naïve of her not to realise that, when you learned to fly, sooner or later there would be a bumpy landing. However, the question that she would soon have to answer was, would she be willing and able to get back up and take flight once more, or, for her own sanity, would she remain permanently grounded?


	43. Pt3 16) Bird in a gale

**Part Three: Their Secret**

**Chapter Sixteen: Bird in a gale**

Tai Kamiya struggled to cut through the station crowd as he chased after his sister. His mind going a million miles an hour as he tried to process what had just happened. One minute he had been sharing a kiss with Kari, the next she had burst into tears and buried her head into his chest. He’d comforted her and once she had calmed down, she’d asked to go home. Naturally, he had agreed, for clearly, she was upset. However, when he’d placed an arm around her shoulder, her whole body had jerked and she’d quickly ask him not to touch her. No sooner had he removed his hand, she had bolted. What on earth had he done to upset her so much?

“Kari!” Tai called out once he escaped from a throng of people that had almost dragged him down the street outside the station. While she had managed to get a fair distance in front of him, it should not have been far enough that she would not have heard him. However, she did not respond. He tried again, “Kari!”

Nothing.

Quickening his pace, Tai actually had to hit full pelt in order to catch up with her. His mind hurriedly replayed the whole incident since coming off the train. Searching for anything he had said or done that might have caused her to react this way. Was it because he had told her that they needed to return to the normal sibling dynamic once they got home? That would certainly make sense. For she had broken down into tears after he had said that. But she had known that would be the case from the moment they had first decided to have a relationship more than would be considered socially acceptable. In fact, she’d even insisted that she understood the difficulties they would face more than he did. So what had happened?

“Kari,” Tai panted when he finally caught up with her. He went to put his arm around her shoulder, but at the last moment remembered her request. Instead, he dumbly asked the obvious, “what’s wrong?”

He caught a glimpse of fresh tear lines on her right cheek before she turned her face away from him. But she still would not answer him.

“Kari, please talk to me?” he said, his own hurt feelings being shoved to the side for now. His sister was in pain and he had to help her.

“…Tai…” Her voice, barely an audible whisper, sounded like it had fractured and that each word hurt her to utter. “…I…I’m... s…so… s…s…sorry…”

“Kari, what on earth are you sorry for?” he asked in confusion. For he had no idea what she was apologising for.

They travelled to the end of the road and when he received no response, Tai decided that he needed to stop her. Putting on a quick burst of acceleration, for his sister was still moving at a fair pace, he darted in front of her and came to a halt. She stopped and for a brief second, he saw her eyes were red and that she was still crying before she turned her head away again.

“Kari, please tell me what’s wrong. What are you apologising for?”

“Tai, p…p…please m…move.”

“Not until you tell me what’s wrong,” he replied firmly. “You need to talk to me, Kari.”

She moved to go around him, but he quickly blocked her path. “Kari…”

“I’m sorry for everything!” she wailed, her head turning to face him. When he gazed into those reddish-brown eyes, he saw a world of pain and hurt that tested his resolve of not touching her to the limit. To see his sister suffer so much was bad enough, but to think that he was responsible in some way felt unbearable. “…p…p…please j…j…just l…l…let me g…go h…home…”

She made to go past him again and in that split second, Tai was forced to make a choice. Did he refuse to accept what she was willing to tell him at this time and physically haul her backwards like TK had, or did he let her go? Whatever had happened, it was clear that Kari either did not wish to or physically could not talk about it at this time. And he had to respect her decision, regardless of how much it hurt him to see her like this or indeed what his own feelings were at present. So he made the only choice he could and let her go.

Walking close behind his sister, Tai spoke softly, “when you’re ready to talk, I’ll be there for you. All you need to do is come find me.”

If it had not been for the fact that they had turned onto a deserted street, he suspected he probably would not have heard her mumbled, “thank you.”

His head still full of questions, Tai trudged the last leg of the way home feeling completely at sea. The last thing she had said to him before breaking down into tears at the station had summed the evening until that point up perfectly; it had been magical. Now… now he was left wondering whether or not he would ever feel that way again.

##

The door to her bedroom clicked shut and Kari’s fingers fumbled for a moment before it locked. Pressing her back up against the woodwork, she let out a ragged breath as she slid down it to the floor. A fresh wave of hot tears poured forth as she wrapped her shaking arms around her huddled knees. Two wet patches formed on her ripped black jeans as she shed every last tear that she had left inside of her. She had no idea how long it took before her mind was able to form any sort of thought. When it finally did, it came in the form of, what had happened to her?

Only before she could start to piece together an answer, a voice from the dark depths of her mind hissed, _“you ruined everything, Kari Kamiya.”_

Kari shuddered uncontrollably on hearing those words. It had been seven weeks since she had last suffered at the hands of that voice. And foolishly, she’d genuinely believed that it had been driven off for good. If the situation were not so dire she would have laughed at her own stupidity. How could she possibly have gotten rid of a part of her own mind?

_“You had exactly what you wanted. Everything that you’d dared not even imagine could ever be possible and you ruined it.”_

I didn’t mean to, Kari thought, as though that was an acceptable explanation of her actions.

_“Do you enjoy making yourself suffer?” _the voice asked mockingly. _“Or are you that pathetic that you **need** to suffer? Is it the only thing in life that you understand? Pain and suffering.”_

“No,” she said in a whisper that was muffled by how close her mouth was to her jeans. Then added internally, I don’t even know what happened.

The voice continued its assault upon her, _“I’ve already told you. You’ve ruined everything. You’ve led another victim down a hallway of deceit before pulling the rug out from underneath them.”_

Kari lifted her head up and her eyes widened as she was treated to a replay of what had happened at the train station. “Oh, god,” she said in a ghostly echo. How must Tai be feeling after the way she had reacted? He had taken a leap of faith and kissed her out in public. Only for her to respond by breaking down in tears and then running away from him. Exceptionally hurt and rejected she would imagine as a bare minimum. She needed to go and talk to him. To explain what had happened.

She was about to try and stand up when the voice hissed again, _“at, at, ah. Aren’t we forgetting something?”_

Kari froze and could picture the gleam of triumph on its disembodied face when she failed to give an answer.

_“Even if Tai forgave you, which by all rights he shouldn’t, you’re forgetting why you broke down and then ran away in the first place.”_

She thought back to the train station and the overwhelming feelings of sadness and despondency she had felt stirred inside her once more. Being alone with Tai, as boyfriend and girlfriend, had been so wonderful that it had felt like she was soaring above the clouds. However, only at that moment back on the platform, did she truly appreciate how hard-hitting the ground again would be. Forcibly going from that high back to a sustained period of feeling so low would be agonising. Not only that, but she knew that the higher she climbed each time, the further she would inevitably have to fall. And that scared her at an almost primal level. How long would it take for it to become unbearable? For her depression to return and slowly start to pull her under? A month… two? And, realistically, what future could they possibly have together? Maybe it would be best for her to cut her losses now, before either of them or both, were seriously hurt.

Kari let out an agonising moan as her eyes located a new batch of tears for her to cry. How could she possibly end their fledgeling relationship now after spending two years yearning for it? What was she supposed to do? Either way she lost.

_“Having fun yet?” _the voice mocked and she could picture clearly the sickening grin on its non-existent face. _“If you were a stronger person, this would be easy. But you’re not, Kari Kamiya. You’re a weak, pathetic creature that got everything she ever wanted and yet still had to fuck it up.”_

I knew it would be hard, but not like this… not like this, she wailed inside her own head.

_“And you thought I was bad before,” _the voice laughed in a tone reminiscent of Myotismon._ “Well, guess what, you’ve just manufactured a whole host of new things to hate yourself for. So congratulations, little Kari, you’ve singlehandedly manufactured your own torment and misery. We’re going to have so much fun.”_

There was nothing more Kari could do as she surrendered herself to the torment of her own self-loathing. She had gotten everything she had ever wanted, only to find that she lacked the strength to even make a decision on the matter, let alone pursue the course of action she’d fantasised for so long about. Huddled alone on her bedroom floor, she suffered continuously until unconsciousness finally claimed her. All the while aware, that her brother would not be coming to her rescue this time.


	44. Pt3 17) The remains of our love

**Part Three: Their Secret**

**Chapter Seventeen: The remains of our love**

It had been the first properly cold morning of the season today and unfortunately, for Tai Kamiya and the rest of his soccer teammates, they had all been forced to get up early for a pre-school training session. However, given that it was now the second week of November, it should not have come as much of a surprise. In a few short weeks, December would be here and with winter in toe. Even though they had won on Saturday, the coach had worked them like the Numemon slaves of WaruMonzaemon. Unsurprisingly, he had been exhausted come his first class of the day. The only positive from the hellish workout had been it had worked wonders to take his mind away from Kari.

After their first date on Saturday, his sister had fallen ill and so spent all of Sunday in bed. Meaning that he still had no answers as to what exactly happened after they got off the train back in Odaiba. He’d gone to check on her a few times, but she’d been asleep. So, like it or not, he would have to wait until Kari was feeling better in order to find out what had happened. However, it had not stopped him worrying about her for the rest of the day.

Come this morning he had been surprised when she’d sat down at the breakfast table. It was difficult to explain, given that she had been dressed in her school uniform, but even with her lit match hair, she’d felt so ordinary. Like she had de-Digivolved back into her previous self. It had been heartbreaking to witness. Especially when her _“good morning,” _had sounded so soulless. The only problem had been that he’d been forced to leave in order to make it on time for soccer practice. So there had been zero opportunity to talk with her beyond a greeting.

Come morning break, Tai found himself wandering the hallways aimlessly. He’d paid a visit to one of the vending machines to get an apple and a granola bar, both of which had been devoured and now had nothing but time to kill before class resumed. Unsurprisingly, his mind drifted back to Kari and he had just started to contemplate how long he should wait before broaching the subject with her himself when he heard raised voices coming from the classroom on his left. He knew those voices well. It was Matt and Sora. Not really knowing why, for it was absolutely none of his business anymore, he stopped to listen.

“…did you even stop to consider how I might feel?” Matt yelled and Tai could tell he was angry. Almost to the level that he typically only reached when the two of them were arguing. This must be bad.

“I’ve not even properly thought about it, yet you’re acting like I’ve already decided!” Sora fired back.

Whatever this was about, it sounded serious Tai thought.

“That’s because I’m always the lowest of your priorities. Yet I was the most understanding when your mom started making things difficult for you.”

“Your solution was to tell her to fuck off and move in with you and your dad!”

“You never even considered it!”

“I didn’t consider it because it was stupid!”

“So I’m stupid now, is that it!”

“You’re twisting my words, Matt. Just like you always do.”

“Well, maybe if you were more open about how you felt, I wouldn’t have to search everything you said looking for any subtle hints you might have left. You give me nothing, Sora!”

“Well, I’m giving you this. It’s over, Matt!”

At the sound of footsteps, Tai hurriedly moved away from the door. Before his eyes, it flew open and the ginger-haired girl stormed out. Even from his relatively safer distance, he could see that the anger on her face was simply masking her pain and that she was struggling to get enough distance between herself and Matt before she broke down into floods of tears. The empathy he had felt for her two weeks prior quickly resurfaced. However, not before the blonde-haired teen had stormed out of the room after her.

“You’re a right cold bitch, Takenouchi!” he exclaimed as he made to go after her.

Tai felt a sudden surge of anger towards the other boy and as he watched him extend a hand to make a grab for her, the memory of TK doing the same thing to Kari surfaced in his mind. And it served only to intensify his rage. Without thinking, he darted forward and caught Matt’s arm before it made contact with Sora’s shoulder.

“Leave her alone, Matt,” he yelled as he tightened his grip.

“This has nothing to do with you, Kamiya, now let go of me and fuck off,” the other boy fired back as he tried to wrench his arm free.

“I’m not letting go until you calm down and decide to leave her alone. She doesn’t want you following her.”

“Screw you, Kamiya!” Matt spat as he threw a punch with his free hand.

Tai managed to duck in time and when the other boy’s momentum caused his body to turn, he shoved him face-first against the wall and twisted his arm behind his back.

“Son of a… argh!” the blonde hissed when Tai increased the pressure. He did not actually need him to submit, merely to hold him there long enough for Sora to get far enough away that he would not be able to find her.

“Not letting go until you decide not to try and follow her,” he said, unable to suppress the fact that he was enjoying this. Call it payback for the last time they’d spoke; when he’d called Kari a bitch.

“Fuck you, KaMIYAHH!”

Matt’s breaths came through gritted teeth and Tai could see a few beads of sweat on his forehead. “Give up yet?”

“NO… ARGH!... ok, ok, you win,” the blonde teen hissed bitterly.

Slowly he released the tension and then let go of Matt’s arm. He took a cautionary step backwards in case retaliation should come his way, but it didn’t. The other boy grimaced and rotated his shoulder a few times. “Trust you to spring to that bitch’s defence,” he spat.

“From what I heard, you were pretty nasty to her,” Tai fired back. It seemed that he would quite happily take his old friend down again. They still had plenty of other reasons to fight. “No wonder she ditched you.”

To his surprise, Matt started to laugh. “God, you really are clueless, Kamiya, if you think that Sora’s the innocent victim in this one.”

“I never said she was innocent. However, I guess I’ve got an issue with guys trying to grab girls I care about!”

Matt snorted, “figures that you still care about her. Well, you’re welcome to her. Maybe once you’ve swallowed enough of her bullshit and bent over backwards trying to support her and make her happy, you’ll realise I was right.” He turned and without another word, stormed off.

Tai watched him go and quickly disregarded what he’d said as simply being the words of a bitter ex. It was rather ironic though, he thought as he automatically started making his way up the stairs to the art supply cupboard he’d found Sora in two weeks ago. A few months ago, had he witnessed this, he would still have been too blinded by hatred to have intervened. And even though he had still thought himself in love with the girl, he probably would not have been able to bring himself to ask her out. Only now that he was in a position where he could conceivably do just that, he was of no mind to. For he knew the truth about his feelings now.

Reaching the supply cupboard, Tai knocked on the door lightly before opening it. Intending it more as a ‘for your information’ act than a request for permission to enter. Like two weeks ago, he found Sora huddled on the floor, the sound of her sobbing almost deafening in the small, quiet room.

“Hey,” he said softly as he turned on the light and closed the door. “Do you mind if I sit?”

If Sora said anything it was lost amidst her tears. Taking the initiative, Tai walked over and sat down beside her. Neither of them spoke for a few minutes as he allowed her to acclimatise to his presence. He was coming to realise that people in such emotional distress were much like injured animals. You had to approach slowly and make no sudden movements. When eventually he did say something it was a simple, softly spoken, “do you want to talk?”

Sora said nothing and instead, after a further minute of silence, fished in her bag and held out an envelope.

“What’s this?” he asked as he took it from her.

“Read it,” was all she managed to say before shying back into her huddled position.

Tai pulled the single sheet of paper out of the torn opening and unfolded it. His eyes widened as he scanned the page. _“Dear Miss Takenouchi. We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted to Kyoto University, pending a score of 80% or more on the National Center Test for University Admission.”_ The rest was simply about attending an open day.

“Wow, Sora, you got into Kyoto!” Tai exclaimed, feeling a sense of excitement for her. Kyoto currently ranked as the country’s top universities. “That’s amazing! My only chance of getting in there is on a soccer scholarship.” Granted he felt his best chance of getting into anywhere was with soccer.

“Try telling that to my mom… or Matt…” she trailed off as she started to cry again.

“So that’s why you guys were fighting,” he said sombrely, the pieces slotting into place inside his head. “What happened exactly?”

Sora took a few steadying breaths and her tears stopped. “I got the letter this morning and had a big fight with my mom over it.”

“She doesn’t want you to go?”

“No,” she replied shakily. “She’d rather I stayed at home and went to Tokyo University. Though personally, I think she’d rather I didn’t go at all and started working full time at the flower shop.”

“That’s a bummer,” Tai conceded, feeling a stab of pity for the girl. Sora was an intelligent person who deserved the chance to follow her own dreams, not be stuck doing what her mom dictated.

“I told her that I hadn’t even made a decision yet and she started going on about how we couldn’t afford it.” Her voice was then laced with regret as she continued, “I said I would get a job and save for it in the meantime and then find one once I got there. To which she said I already had one. We then got into a massive row over how she only gives me an allowance instead of paying me properly.”

When she started to cry again, he reached out and put an arm around her. He’d known for a long time that her mother took advantage of her, but it seemed to have gotten far worse of late. Especially given how much Sora suggested she had been doing the last time they spoke. The ginger-haired girl then buried her head into his chest. This was becoming a somewhat familiar position Tai mused as he held her tightly in his strong arms.

“I take it Matt didn’t like the idea of you leaving either?” he then said.

“He noticed that I was upset and I’d foolishly hoped he might offer me some comfort… He was supposed to be my boyfriend, Tai,” she wailed. He could feel the damp patches on his shirt against his skin but did not relinquish his grip. “Instead, once I showed him the letter, he assumed I’d already decided that I was going and started making it all about him and how I hadn’t taken his feelings into account.”

“That’s kinda where I came in,” he confessed.

“So you eavesdropped?”

“Well, kind of, but to be fair you guys were quite loud,” he admitted, hoping that he wouldn’t be the next stop on her argument trail. “Although I probably shouldn’t have stopped to listen.”

“I’m glad you did, Tai,” Sora replied, catching him slightly off guard. On any other day, he would have expected the riot act.

“Why? Eavesdropping isn’t exactly the nicest thing to do.”

She raised her head and looked at him. Her cheeks were blotchy and the skin around her eyes just as red as her pupils and quite puffy. “Sometimes we do a bad thing for the right reasons.” He looked at her blankly, so she added, “if you hadn’t stopped to listen, you wouldn’t be here now when I need you most.”

Tai did not know how to respond to what she had just said. The idea of Sora, the girl who looked after everyone else, admitting that she needed someone was huge.

She then let out a hollow laugh. “I suppose it’s ironic, isn’t it…”

“What’s ironic?” he asked curiously.

“…that even after all I did to you with the choice that I made, it’s you, not Matt, who’s sitting here with me in this dingy cupboard and listening to my problems.”

“I was just as much to blame,” Tai asserted, though kept his voice soft. “I kept blowing hot and cold. Never giving you anything concrete that said I was definitely interested in you.”

“I remember. You were a bit of a bonehead, while Matt made his feelings crystal clear…”

“Geez, thanks,” he laughed lightly, knowing that her remark had summed the situation up perfectly.

Sora looked him straight in his eyes, her gaze so full of sorrow and regret“…and I made the wrong choice.”

Hearing sora say those words brought a wave of confusion crashing down atop Tai. “What do you mean by, you made the wrong choice?” The thought passed through his mind and out of his lips before he even had a chance to properly process it, let alone try and stop it. Surely she couldn’t be suggesting that…

“I picked the wrong person, Tai. It should have been you… it should always have been you…”

Before Tai knew what was happening, Sora reached up and kissed him full on the lips. Even though her own were cold, he could feel a warmth and love reminiscent of how it felt when he kissed Kari. However, no sooner had it begun, it ended as she pulled away.

“Oh my god, Tai, I am so sorry!” she blurted out as she hastily untangled herself from his arms. “I should never have put you in that position. I am so sorry.”

Still struggling to overcome the sheer shock of what had just happened, Tai could only watch, his face still frozen in the position it had been when she’d kissed him, as Sora grabbed her bag, stuffed the letter back inside it and rushed to her feet. His head pivoted on his neck as she darted past him. When she reached the door, he managed to utter, “Sora, wait,” but the girl did not stop. Scrambling to his own feet, mind racing, Tai skidded to a halt when the door latch clicked and he cannoned into the now-closed woodwork. “Ouch!” he grimaced as he staggered backwards slightly. It took him half a moment to recover from the impact before he managed to seize the handle and open the damn thing. Spilling out into the corridor, his eyes scanned the surrounding area for any sign of the ginger-haired girl but she had vanished.

Bastard! Tai thought as he kicked the door closed behind him. What on earth had just happened? Sora just indicated that she loves you, not Matt, Bonehead, his brain supplied helpfully. Surely she had not meant it. This had to simply be a reaction to her current emotional state. He just happened to be the one there to help her pick up the pieces. He shook his head. Unfortunately, he knew Sora too well. That had not been a knee jerk reaction. He’d seen it in her eyes. Why did his life have to complicate itself so spectacularly?

His mind felt like a complete train wreck when the chime to signal the end of morning break sounded. Not only did he have the whole Kari situation to deal with, but now Sora had just admitted she’d made the wrong choice a year ago and demonstrated the point by kissing him. This was completely messed up! Two months ago, despite his anger, he would have been over the moon to discover that Sora loved him, not Matt. Yet now, he’d discovered that he was in love with his own sister and become involved in a precarious incestuous relationship with her. One that he currently did not even know the state of. Shuffling along the corridor, Tai made his way back to class. It seemed that his girl problems had now multiplied. Now there were two of them than he needed to talk to. And he had no idea what to say to either.


	45. Pt3 18) Is this the life we really want?

**Part Three: Their secret**

**Chapter Eighteen: Is this the life we really want?**

Kari Kamiya did not recall falling asleep after coming home from her date with Tai on Saturday night. She’d woken to find herself lying on the floor in front of her bedroom door. It had been five-thirty in the morning and her skin had felt like ice. Robotically, she had changed into her pyjamas and climbed into bed, where she’d quickly fallen asleep. Next time she had woken up it had been almost one in the afternoon and she’d felt horrible. Her head had hurt, her throat felt sore and her limbs had ached from having slept for hours on the unforgiving wooden floor. Unfortunately, she had been desperate for a drink of water and so been forced to go to the kitchen. Her mother had made to start on her, but after taking one look at her, had immediately gone to fetch the thermometer; it had added fever to her list of symptoms. She had then been sent straight back to bed with a jug of ice water and some cold medication. The rest of her day had been spent there. With her mom bringing her some soup at dinner time; fortunately from a tin. Both her father and Tai had poked their heads in to see how she was feeling at different points, but she had pretended to be asleep when it had been the latter. The only upshot had been that she’d felt so horrible and exhausted that the hissing voice from the dark depths of her mind had remained silent.

Monday morning had come around and after having her temperature checked twice to ensure it had come down overnight, her mom had decided she was well enough for school. Kari had stood in front of the mirror that morning, dressed in her green school uniform and felt so flat. It had been seven weeks since she’d had her hair dyed and her brown roots were now starting to show. Perhaps it was a sign of how she felt internally, that she had not noticed before then. For she’d felt far more akin to the girl who’d worn yellow and pink than the one who’d created the Digital Punk outfit that hung in her wardrobe. At the breakfast table, she’d been forced to sit opposite Tai and pretend that everything was alright when she couldn’t even bear to look at him. Fortunately, he’d left for soccer practice soon after and so she’d been spared having to say anything more than good morning to him. It had been bitter outside when cycling to school and made her wish that girls could wear trousers. In homeroom, she’d had to face Yolei and the discovery that she had completely forgotten that the lavender haired girl had agreed to model her green weirdo t-shirt and ripped black jeans for a photoshoot in the drama room after school that day. Granted it had been a blessing in disguise, for all she wanted to do was go home to bed. An apology had not been necessary, for Yolei had taken one look at her and deduced that she was ill. However, she’d been forced to agree to reschedule in order to make it look like nothing else had happened. The day had passed slowly and she’d felt increasingly more rotten as it had dragged on. So much so, that by the time she had made it home, she’d gone straight to bed; after a bowl of soup her mother had practically poured down her throat.

Come this morning, while she had physically felt back to normal, her mental state had not improved. After having received a bye for the past two days, the hissing voice had started from almost the moment she’d set foot out of bed. _“Tick-Tock, little Kari,” _it had said menacingly when she left her bedroom to go shower. It hadn’t needed to say anymore. For she knew that time was running out. Tai too had given her space while she had been ill, but sooner or later she would have to face him. _“And say what?” _it had then asked her. Posing a question that she could not answer. Eventually, she had been forced to leave early so she could forgo her bicycle and listen to some music to try and drive it away.

At school, she had spent the morning trying to play songs from memory in order to keep it at bay before she could slip her headphones back on at break and lunchtime. Only it had meant she had been unable to focus on her lessons at the same time and gotten into trouble from her maths teacher for failing to even acknowledge that the woman had asked her a question; much to her embarrassment. It had not been worth the risk to get caught out twice in one day so she had been forced to pay attention in the afternoon, leaving her mind defenceless against a gleeful voice and its continued probing of her mind with questions like, _“what are you going to say to him, little Kari?”_ When she had left school, she’d been forced to put on Amarok and turn it up full blast in order to send it scurrying back into its hole. Her walk home had included several detours in order to make it last the full hour that the single-track album played for.

It was quarter-past-eleven and Kari sat alone on her bed, dressed in a pale blue long-sleeved top and a pair of regular denim jeans. She had not worn anything this ordinary by choice in almost two months. Having been listening to music non-stop since she had finished school some seven and a half hours ago, she was down to her last album; Oldfield’s Crises. She flicked to it on her music player and hit play. Before it even began, she knew that the title tracks scant lyrics summed up her situation perfectly. Perhaps the reason she had left it until last.

When the light keyboard notes that opened the album began, Kari huddled her knees to her chest. What was she going to do? It would hurt being without her brother, but it also hurt being with him. And even if she persevered with the relationship, endured the long spells of pain between the short periods of joy, what long term future could they possibly have? If their parents found out while they still lived under their roof, they would be furious and ensure it ended. Even if they somehow managed to keep it a secret until they had both moved out, they would find out eventually and likely disown them. Not to mention their friends. Would any of them still want to associate with them if they knew the truth? And what if, after going through all of that, they then split up? It was a bleak picture, Kari realised. One that, despite what she had said to Tai, she had not fully appreciated. Whenever she had thought about a relationship between them and the difficulties they would face, it had always been about how to keep it a secret. Unfortunately, if they genuinely wanted to be together long term, the cold hard truth was that it would have to come out. And the prospect of that scared her.

There was also her brother’s feelings to consider. She had seen first-hand what happened when you delayed breaking off a relationship until the point that you could no longer keep it going. She couldn’t bear to do that to Tai. Not knowing the amount of pain it would cause him. Sure he would hurt if she ended it now, but that would be nothing compared to how he would feel if they had to end things much further down the line. Not to mention, if he felt like she did, the pain he would have to endure during the long spells where they had to remain in the sibling zone.

Kari shook her head in dismay. Was she seriously contemplating giving up the thing she had wanted more than anything in the world? The answer to that almost brought her to tears, yes, she was. Those first five fantastic days they had spent together now felt like a distant memory. She had been so happy and so far above the clouds during that time that she’d never wanted it to end. Only it had. Almost three weeks on and the comedown had proven hard to take. While they had shared a night of uncontrollable passion, a short walk in the park and Saturday night’s magical first date (minus the ending), it had not been enough and the in-between time agonising. And she did not know if she could put herself through it, knowing what the endgame might have in store for them.

A small sob escaped from Kari’s lips but no tears accompanied it. This was getting her nowhere. She had sat here for almost seven hours now, with the same things popping in and out of her head and still not managed to figure out what to do. However, she knew one thing. If she did not act soon either one of two things would happen. Either she would drive herself insane, or Tai would eventually come looking for answers. There was only one thing for it. She would have to talk to her brother, explain what had happened on Saturday night and hope she figured out what she wanted to do. Pulling out her cell phone, she glanced at the time; 11:25 pm. With any luck, he would still be awake.

_“Are you still awake?” _she typed, finger hovering over the send button for a few moments before it shakily hit it.

##

Across the hallway, Tai sat at his desk, pen in hand as he finished the last of his homework. It had taken a monumental effort to get everything done, that had a deadline of tomorrow. Having come home from school after another brutal soccer practice, he’d needed to ask his mom to allow him to have dinner in his bedroom so he wouldn’t have to stop. Popping his earbuds into his ears, he’d started with Ommadawn and worked his way through Kari’s music collection while he tackled assignment after assignment. However, the worst part about the day had been his inability to make any headway with his dual girl troubles. In school, Sora had managed to avoid and elude him for the duration of the day and once the final piece of homework had been dished out, he’d known that there would be no opportunity to talk with Kari either. Hell, he had only seen his sister twice in the past two days and each encounter had been a brief one at the breakfast table.

Tai’s eyes flickered to the clock on his cell phone as, at long last, he started the final question of the last assignment; a set of physics problems. It had just gone twenty-past-eleven. Well, at least he should be done by half-past. That would allow him about seven hours of sleep, assuming he could get his brain to switch off. Not likely, he mused as he wrote out the relevant equations for solving the problem. As soon as he finished this assignment, his mind would probably return to the Kari problem. Involuntarily, the thought flickered through his mind, what had happened that night at the train station? He sighed and tried to force it out of the way so he could figure out the solution to this final problem. Just ten more minutes, then you can have at it, he tried to reason with his own head. Surprisingly, it seemed to work as an idea about how to solve the problem came to him and his pen started to scribble across the page.

Next to him, his phone vibrated, but he ignored it for now. After a few more minutes, he wrote the units next to his calculated answer and set down his pen. Finished! Letting out a slow exhale, he allowed the sweet sound of tubular bells to ring in his ears as the first piece of the album drew to a close. He really needed to thank Kari for sharing her music collection with him when he next spoke to her. When the final guitar notes faded, Tai turned his attention to his cell phone and flipped it open.

“Kari,” he breathed slowly when he saw who had sent the message.

Wasting no more time he opened it and read, _“Are you still awake?”_

Shit, he thought! His sister had sent it a few minutes ago and he’d ignored it to finish the stupid physics problem. Hastily he sent a reply.

##

Kari waited with bated breath on a reply coming. If he’d finished studying he might already be asleep. In which case she would have to wait until tomorrow. She was about to close her eyes and try to lose herself in the remainder of her album when her phone vibrated on the bed.

_“Yeah, literally just finished the last of my homework. Why? Are you ok?” _she read. As always, Tai put care and compassion for her before his own feelings.

_“We need to talk. Is there any chance we could maybe go for a walk?” _she sent back quickly.

_“Make sure you’re dressed warmly and bring your winter jacket. I’ll meet you at the front door.” _

Switching off her music player, Kari pulled off her headphones and left both on her bed. Going to her wardrobe she withdrew a beige woollen jumper and pulled it on. She then found a matching white hat, scarf and glove set, along with her pink winter coat. Last week she would have been strongly opposed to wearing it, given the colour, but tonight put it on with a sense of resignation. Quietly she left her room and crept down the hallway and through the main living area to where Tai awaited her at the front door.

“Are you sure you’re feeling well enough for this?” he whispered in his concerned big brother tone. She never gave a seconds thought to taking offence at him using it.

“Yes,” she nodded. “I’m feeling a lot better and am dressed warmly.”

“Ok, if you’re sure,” Tai replied, giving her a soft smile.

Kari pulled her trainers on, which she hadn’t worn for weeks and watched as her brother carefully opened the front door, making the minimum amount of noise possible. She stepped out at his behest into the cold night air. He followed and quietly closed the door behind him; locking it.

“Where do you want to go?” he asked as they set off towards the stairs.

“I don’t know,” she admitted truthfully, having not thought about a destination. “Somewhere we can talk in private.”

Her brother thought for a moment before replying, “let’s go down to the bayside. There’s an overpass that we can sit under there.”

“Ok,” she agreed in a meek voice.

##

They walked down to street level and for several minutes before Tai broke the silence. “How have you been feeling?” he asked, unable to hide the concern from his tone. After the incident when he was eight, he had always been wary about taking Kari outside so soon after she had been ill, especially if it was cold.

“I already said I was feeling better, you don’t have to worry,” she answered with a small fake smile. However, the look she received told her that he had not bought the gesture.

“I didn’t mean in terms of your physical health,” Tai responded calmly. While she had clearly dodged the question, he tried to keep any irritation he may have felt from his tone.

She let out a low sigh, “I’ve been better.”

“At least you’re being honest with me,” Tai said with a slight grin. “I know from personal experience that when one of us is paying attention, the other has difficulty lying.”

A few days ago, Kari would have responded with something sassy like, ‘maybe you have difficulty’, but instead simply said, “we know each other too well.”

Tai allowed her a little bit of breathing space by refraining from asking anything else for a few minutes. After they had crossed onto the opposite sidewalk and turned a corner, he eventually said, “I’ve really missed talking with you these past few days.” Hoping that a demonstration that he was not mad at her would help ease the air of worry that he sensed hung over her like a black cloud.

She looked down at her feet. “I’m sorry, Tai.” It was the best she could do. The memory of what had happened on Saturday night still haunted her and the overwhelming feelings of guilt made it difficult to say anything else. By rights, Tai should hate her, yet that did not seem to be the case. And somehow that made the whole situation worse, given what she had been contemplating while back in her bedroom.

“You said that on Saturday night too,” he replied, still unsure of what she had been apologising for then.

Again his tone was caring and compassionate, with no trace of anger, frustration or annoyance. Why was he not angry with her? Because that’s not Tai, at least not when it comes to you, her brain eventually said. This thought only led Kari to wonder whether or not he would be acting the same way if she were some other girl. Did she merit such a kind response because she was his sister or because he was in love with her?

When his sister did not reply, Tai probed slightly further, “I still don’t understand what you are apologising for.” He needed her to know that, while he was in no way judging her actions, he needed to know what had happened so he could help her.

The cold air bit at her face as they kept walking, only she struggled to find the words to answer him. Yet at no point did Tai push her for an explanation. Instead, he stayed close by her side, a pillar of strength should she need one to cling to. They passed very few other pedestrians on their way down to the underpass. Sitting down on a concrete block facing the water, Kari stared out over the dark water.

Setting himself down next to his sister, Tai continued to give her space. Something serious was wrong with her, he could feel it deep inside. And while he desperately wanted to help, he had to allow her to dictate the pace. To talk to him in her own time. While she might have thought it overprotective big brother mode, it now ran deeper than that. He did not wish to protect her because she was his sister. No. He would protect her because he was in love with her. For his feelings for her trumped their sibling relationship.

Sucking in a breath of cold air that almost caught inside her chest, Kari eventually worked up the courage to talk. However, could only repeat the same thing she had said on Saturday night, “I’m sorry for everything, Tai.”

Unsure if his sister might still have an issue with him touching her, Tai reached out and took one of her gloved hands in his own. He felt her jump slightly at the contact, but she did not run or try to take her hand back. “I’m still not sure what you mean,” he said as he turned to look at her, noticing that she still could not meet his gaze.

Kari kept her eyes focused on the water, unable to look at him. “I’m sorry for not talking to you for the past three days,” she began, thinking it best to work backwards. “I’m sorry for breaking down on Saturday and for not being able to explain what happened.” She paused and took another breath of cold air. She had to face him. Needed to look him in the eyes. He deserved that at least. From somewhere deep inside, she found the strength to shift her gaze to her brother’s chocolate brown orbs. Even in the darkness, they shone brightly. “And I’m sorry for losing control of myself seven weeks ago and kissing you. For then telling you my secret and all the pain and trouble it has put you through since.” Tears began to run down her chilly cheeks as she made that final apology; the hardest one she’d ever made.

Tai could not believe what he was hearing as his sister made her multiple apologies. Why was she saying sorry for the incident that had led to their discovery of each other’s feelings? Yes, it had caused both of them some measure of pain and while he had borne the brunt of it, he had the scars to prove it, she had suffered two years’ worth of it prior. While a look of confusion spread across his face, he knew that his eyes betrayed the fact that he felt slightly hurt. Where was she going with this? “Kari…” he breathed softly, unsure of what to say. “What are you saying? Why are you apologising for telling me your secret and for what’s happened since?”

“Because you would have been better off never finding out,” she wailed as hot tears continued to flow. “If you’d remained ignorant, you probably would have found someone to be happy with, eventually. All I’ve done is cause you pain and hurt and I am so, so sorry for all of it.”

The shock of what she had just said hit Tai hard but he knew he had to endure the blow and reassure her that she did not need to apologise for what had happened between them. “Kari, that’s not true…” he began, but she cut him off.

“…I caused you to start self-harming!” she exclaimed, that fact only now entering her thought process.

“That was my fault,” Tai countered, still managing to keep a calm, steady tone. “I was stupid and should have told you from the start how I felt. And I’ve never felt happier than during the times I’ve spent with you since.”

“That’s how I’ve felt too,” she conceded. “But the time in-between has been agony. Having you there right in front of me and being unable to express how I feel or touch you in any way that mom and dad would not approve of. And I know it’s only going to get worse.”

While her initial words felt reassuring, it was short-lived as the next hammer blow came. While he could not argue that the past three weeks had been difficult or that her assertion that the time when they could not express their feelings had hurt, he felt a creeping fear at her suggestion that it would only get worse. Was this heading where he thought it was..? That didn’t bear thinking about. Unable to hide the concern from his tone, he replied, “what are you saying, Kari?”

“I don’t know!” she cried in frustration, still unable to make a decision. “But I don’t know if I can keep doing this. To continue putting both of us through this constant heartache.”

“I know it’s difficult, but we can get through it together,” Tai replied. He gave her hand a light squeeze as he tried to reassure her that it would be ok. “We just need to keep talking to one another when we can.”

“Have you thought about the future, Tai?” she asked, turning back to face the running water. She could tell that her brother hoped to talk her down, but she needed him to realise the truth she had come to understand earlier that night. “About what possible long-term future there is for us?”

Kari’s question caught him off guard and threatened to derail his efforts to calm her. He hadn’t given any thought to a long-term future for them. There had been so much to process these past few weeks that nothing beyond navigating the here and now had entered his thought process. And while he desperately wished he could tell her that he had, he was forced to tell the truth. “No. Not beyond the immediate future and how we keep this a secret from mom and dad.”

“I hadn’t either… until tonight.” Kari confessed. “Like you, I’ve been so focused on keeping it a secret, that I hadn’t realised the truth.”

He frowned at her. “What truth, Kari?” he asked with trepidation. What had she come to realise that neither of them had thought of before now? His sister had always been the confident one on this subject from day one. The one who had been so sure about what she wanted and that she understood the difficulties. What truth could have shattered her resolve so devastatingly?

“That if we want to be together, we can’t keep it a secret,” she cried. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw her brother tilt his head. However, when he did not reply, she turned back to face him and continued, “if mom and dad find out while we’re still living under their roof, they’ll be furious and ensure it stops.”

Tai nodded in agreement. That was a given and something they both had known. Unfortunately, he sensed there was more to come, so he allowed her to continue.

“However, even if we managed to keep it a secret until we had both moved out, they’d find out when we started living together and probably disown us.” She watched as realisation dawned on his face. “All our friends would eventually find out too and probably cease their association with us.”

Tai let out a long sigh as the weight of what she said came down upon him. Desperately, he searched his mind for some reason or scenario in which her reality would not come to pass. Only there was none to be found. Eventually, he had to concede, “you’re right. I never even considered what would happen in the long term.”

“I thought I understood how hard it would be for us to have a relationship, but I realise now that I had barely scratched the surface…” Kari trailed off, unable to vocalise the reality of the situation. Her eyes drifting to the dark waters once more. It felt even worse now that she was talking to her brother about it and deep inside she could feel the inevitable endgame approach.

“It’s a grim scenario,” Tai said in resignation. He knew exactly what angle his sister had been coming from with her earlier comments now. And as much as he wanted to deny it, his heart could already feel the tip of the blade. “It’ll be even worse if we were to ever split up,” he then added, knowing that the comment only served as another nail.

“Do you see now why I’m sorry for everything? This is all my fault.” Kari felt cold, un-gloved fingers reach out and touch her chin. She offered no resistance when he turned her head back to face him.

“Don’t apologise for anything,” Tai said softly, surprised that he still had the strength to keep his tone so calm. “This was something that both of us needed to do. Even if we didn’t know it at the time.”

His brilliant chocolate eyes were full of more sorrow than Kari had ever seen when he then said, “so what happens now?”

Her gaze shifted down at the hand he still held. “I don’t know,” she whispered. “I’ve wanted this for so long that I can’t bear the thought of giving it up. But at the same time…”

“You don’t know if you can bear the pain that it’ll bring,” Tai finished for her. He knew exactly how she felt. If these past few weeks had been agony, it might be nothing to how it might be for them the deeper their relationship became. Not to mention how it would feel if they arrived at this scenario further down the road. Eventually, he voiced the reality they faced, “are the sporadic highs that we can have worth the long periods when we can’t be together? Not to mention everything that comes later on if we were to make it that far.”

Kari raised her head to look at him once more. The entire bottom of her world now feeling as though it hung on by a thread and that a razor blade was slowly descending. “Answer me this,” she asked, needing confirmation that he felt exactly the same way she did. “If we do this, will it break your heart?” Her voice started to crack when she uttered those final words and she started to feel cold at her core, despite the heavy layers of clothing.

No matter how hard they fought, Tai knew that this was one battle that they could not win. Perhaps it had been foolish of them to think a relationship could ever end any other way. That, one way or the other, this outcome had not been inevitable from day one. As the resignation set in he felt the fight leave his body and a single tear escaped from his left eye. In a whisper, he replied to her question with the painful truth, “yes.”

“That makes two of us,” Kari cried and dissolved into a flood of her own tears. Seeing Tai, her indomitable brother, shed a tear over her had been the final straw. She felt his strong arms wrap themselves around her and she buried her head into his chest.

“I love you, Kari. And I always will,” Tai said in a voice that was quickly fracturing. “But you’re right. This will only be harder the longer we let it go on.” His tears flowed freely as he felt his own hand plunge the metaphorical knife into his heart. For that was the reality of the situation. They were breaking their own hearts now, when the pain would be less severe, in order to save each other from a worse fate at an inevitable later date. 

“I love you too, Tai,” she replied, forcing herself to sit up. Through blurry eyes, she could see two crooked lines running down his face and she knew that he too felt like his heart was being wrenched from his chest and shattered into a million pieces. “Will you do one last thing for me,” she eventually managed to ask.

Tai nodded a wordless reply. How could he possibly refuse her one final request?

“Kiss me… one last time.”

Amidst an ice-cold wind that had begun to blow through the night, their lips met like two flames joining to form one. A singular warm flame that embodied all the love and passion that they had held for one another. A sole fire that had burned so bright over the past few weeks. But one that extinguished the moment their lips parted. Whether they had been ignorant or simply ignored the truth from the start, for Tai and Kari Kamiya, the love they shared had reached its inevitable end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, Guys. Thank you for taking the time to read part three, I hope you all enjoyed it. If so, please leave me a comment or some Kudos. I would really love to hear what you all thought of it.


	46. Pt3 Epilogue: All lovers are deranged

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone. Ok, so before we start, I need to give you all a huge apology. I finished writing parts 4,5&6 of this story back in March but forgot to update it here. Hence, I will endeavour to upload all three parts asap. My thanks to Lucas for his comment, which reminded me that I needed to do so. 
> 
> As of part six, this particular story is now complete. However, I will save any discussion on it until the end so as to avoid any spoilers. 
> 
> My thanks to everyone who has left me Kudos or a comment and to you all for just reading this story. If, by the end, you have any questions or wish to express your thoughts about it, please feel free and I will get back to you as soon as I can. 
> 
> Anyway, let's kick things off with the epilogue to part three and then go from there. I hope you all enjoy.

**Part Three: Their Secret**

**Epilogue: All lovers are deranged**

A small club, with a capacity of just over two-hundred, could be found at the bottom of a set of concrete steps. Steps that started beneath a small pink and blue neon sign that said ‘Underground’. Next to the larger and flashier signs of the various bars and other night time hot spots on the street, it tended only to be frequented by those that already knew it was there. As was customary, Friday nights saw it play host to a live band. Something that guaranteed it would be standing room only and cleared the owners weekly overhead regardless of how quiet the place was the rest of the time.

It was approaching midnight and tonight’s band had finished their set almost an hour and a half ago. Naturally, this had resulted in the slow dwindling of the clientele, to the point that only a few of the booths that had been carved out of the wall were occupied. However, several patrons still stood around the tall metal tables dotted around the floor. At the bar, a solitary figure with thick blonde hair and wearing a black shirt atop a pair of beige chinos, sat with a shot of bourbon in his hand. Absentmindedly he swirled it around and watched as the sole ice cube chinked against the glass; the sound audible by virtue of the relatively low background noise. As far as weeks went, it would take something pretty spectacular to top this for worst week ever he mused. He took a sip from the glass, feeling the light burn with its notes of cinnamon and burnt orange wash over his tongue and down his throat. Out of the corner of his eye, he caught sight of someone approach the bar.

“Matt Ishida, right,” he heard a female voice say.

“Who wants to know?” Matt replied in an icy tone. He did not turn his head to look at the individual, but his eyes shifted just enough that he could see that they’d arched their back against the edge of the bar.

“You could say I’m a fan,” they replied in what sounded like amusement.

He rolled his eyes. Great, just what he needed right now, a groupie. “No autographs,” he said dismissively and turned his gaze back to the dark amber liquid in his glass.

The girl let out a snort of laughter. “I remember you used to say the exact same thing. Although you never sounded this bitter. What happened? Is there a pole running through that seat and up into your ass?”

He turned to look at the individual, with the intention of telling them to piss off, however, his lexicon failed him as his eyes took over. The girl looked to be about the same age he was and had a wicked spiky pixie-cut, which had been dyed turquoise, above a pair of bright amber eyes. Her clothing was no less outlandish. Tight, black pvc trousers covered her legs and had been paired with knee-high biker boots that had metal plating around the heals. While her upper body was clad in an electric blue halter top, that showed off her well-toned stomach, complete with belly-button piercing. A black leather bolero jacket that barely came down to below her breasts and certainly would not close over them, finished off the outfit.

“My eyes are up here, Ishida,” she laughed.

Matt gave her one of his charming smiles, his bitterness temporarily forgotten. “I guess they’re nice to look at too,” he said smoothly as he gazed into them. There was a fire behind them that warned him that he could easily get burned. He smiled internally too, bring it on! “Can I get you a drink?”

“After leering at me, it’s the least you can do,” she replied with another laugh. “You can get me a bourbon.”

Matt picked up his glass, drained it and signalled the bartender for two more. “You don’t strike me as the bourbon sort,” he said as he waited for the drinks.

“There’s probably a lot of things I won’t strike you as,” she said with a hint of seduction about her tone. Subtle, yes, but there nonetheless.

The bartender set the drinks down on the bar and Matt handed him the money for them. He picked one of them up and held it out to her. “You’re still not getting that autograph.”

She took the glass and downed the shot in one go; giving no indication she had felt the burn. “I don’t recall asking for one.”

He smirked at her again and said, “so, got a name?”

“You really don’t remember me, how cute,” the girl replied with an ‘aww’ expression. “Tell you what, why don’t you drink that…” she indicated for him to pick up the glass and down the shot, then waited for him to do so.

Matt tilted his head slightly. While her face seemed vaguely familiar, he could not place her. His curiosity soon got the better of him and he picked up the glass. He downed the shot while he watched the girl signal the barman.

“…now if you can guess where we met each other, I’ll buy this round. If not, you do. Sound fair?”

“Fine by me,” Matt replied as he began to think. After a moment, he smiled, “we met at one of my gigs.” While he did not know for certain, it made sense, given that she had introduced herself as a fan and it had been The Teenage Wolves playing tonight.

The girl laughed. “Even if you were right, which you’re aren’t, I wouldn’t give you the point for ‘**one **of my gigs’. Now pay the good man,” she indicated the waiting bartender.

“How do I know you’re not lying,” he asked, stopping his hand when it felt the leather of his wallet inside his pocket.

“You don’t,” she smiled, “but I’ll give you this for free, I have been to several of your gigs.”

Matt sighed as he pulled out his wallet and paid the bartender.

The mysterious girl picked up the fresh glass and swirled the contents. “On a related matter, I totally digged how edgy you guys sounded tonight. You were playing like you wanted to kill each other up there.”

“Well I hope you have a good memory,” Matt said as he felt the bitterness that her appearance had driven off, crash back down atop him. “Because it’s the last time you’ll ever hear it.”

“How come?” she asked, sounding genuinely interested.

“Your analogy was apt.” He picked up his drink and downed it. “We really did want to kill each other up there. The second we got backstage, two of the guys started beating each other up. The Teenage Wolves are officially over, period.”

“That’s a shame,” she said before drinking her own bourbon. “However, if you ask me, you should totally go for that edgier sound you guys had tonight with your next band.”

“You really think so?” he asked, finding it quite refreshing to find someone that agreed with him for once; about anything.

“Absolutely,” she answered with a welcome dollop of enthusiasm. “You could even call it something like Knife’s Edge or Edge of the blade. Really build the band and music around this edgier sort of sound.”

Matt pondered this for a moment. She might actually be on to something. However, he would need to find some new, better musicians to buy into the concept first. “You’ve got some good insight,” he said as a thought occurred to him, “you play?”

The girl let out a loud snort of laughter. “I sing in the shower, badly. However, I do know how the creative mind works. Only my canvas is hair.”

“So you’re a hair stylist,” he asked, hoping that some more information might help him figure out who she was.

“Yep. And I can tell you straight away that you’ll need to change yours if you decide to run with an edgier sound. The same goes for your wardrobe.”

“What’s wrong with it?” he asked defensively; he rather liked his wardrobe.

“It’s too plain,” she said, then flashed him a wicked grin. “At present you’re more the bad-boy from a teenage boy band than an edgy, angst driven rock star.”

“I am not!” Matt fired back hotly, however, this only caused her to laugh.

“You most definitely are, trust me. But, if you like, I can help you get to grips with your darker, edgy side.”

“I don’t even know your name,” he scoffed. While the idea of some stranger giving him fashion tips did not appeal to him, he wouldn’t mind hearing her ideas for a new band. Not to mention that she was smoking hot and he single.

“Then buy me one more drink and I’ll tell you,” she said and he could hear more clearly now the hint of seduction in her tone.

Matt signalled the bartender, who promptly filled them out two more shots and just as eagerly, took his money. He handed one over to her.

The girl took the glass and raised it up. “To your next band,” she said.

Matt followed suit, “to my next band.”

Simultaneously they downed the shots and slammed the glassed back down on the bar with slightly more force than was necessary; drawing a disapproving look from the barman. She then looked him in the eyes and smiled, “Teiko.”

Matt stared into those piercing amber orbs as realisation set in. He knew exactly who the girl was now. They had been in middle school together. Although that perhaps was not an adequate description. He had been in middle school and she had shown up when it suited her. While he had not known her that well, he knew someone that did; Tai. “You’re Kamiya’s friend,” he said coldly, feeling a flash of anger at the thought of his former friend.

Teiko’s smile vanished and she rolled her eyes. “Geeze, do you treat everyone that knows Kamiya with such hostility?”

“No,” he replied quickly, his tone short. He thought about the other DigiDestined and quickly realised that Izzy was the only one he spoke with that also still spoke to Tai. “Our friends lists don’t exactly have much crossover anymore.”

“No wonder if you have that attitude, “Teiko said and fixed his eyes with a firm stare. “I’m friends with Kamiya, big deal. He’s not here and he’s certainly not back at my apartment, so what’s the problem?”

“Nothing,” Matt conceded, though his tone was still slightly rough. He then did a double take. “Did you just underhandedly invite me back to your place?”

“I might have done,” she said with a grin. “This place is about to close and I’m pretty sure I’ve got half a bottle of bourbon back home that I could use some help finishing.”

Matt considered her offer. While he’d had a few here already, he could manage another drink or two and still manage to make it home. Although if she had her way, he suspected that might not be necessary. His eyes roved her up and down once more and he could feel a primal hunger stir within him. Teiko, with her edgy style, was polls apart from prim and proper Sora and he loved it.

“Sure, why not,” he replied nonchalantly, trying to play down his eagerness. For he got the distinct impression that one needed to be careful around this girl. “Just let me get my gear and we can leave.”

A thin smile played on Teiko’s lips. “You’d best hurry up. It’s not polite to keep a lady waiting.”

“I’ll see what I can do,” Matt replied and set off for the small room that served as ‘backstage’. On second thoughts, he might want to be mindful of how much he drank, for he certainly would want to remember tonight come morning.

##

Matt followed the turquoise haired girl across the threshold of her apartment and slipped off his shoes before entering the main living area; noticing that she had not bothered to remove her biker boots. At the first opportunity he got, he sat his bass guitar and amp down. Since The Teenage Wolves had violently split up after their gig, he had been unable to load his equipment into the group van, as its owner had taken off the moment he’d loaded his own stuff. Granted he probably wouldn’t have seen it again if he had. Unfortunately, he’d been forced to lug it the whole way to Teiko’s apartment, via a much needed pit stop for something the girl had called a chicken tikka kebab. It may have been the alcohol talking, but it had tasted phenomenal. Matt grimaced as he rotated his shoulders, his gear weighed a damn tonne. He looked up and glanced around the rather messy living space. Strangely, it reminded him of home. Only minus the array of ladies underwear.

“My roommate is a bit of a slob.”

He turned towards the kitchen but saw no sign of his companion. “So none of those thongs or bras belong to you?” he asked, catching sight of a black, wet-look, crotch-less pair that were draped on the back of a two seat sofa.

“I never said that,” Teiko replied. While he still could not see her face, Matt knew she was grinning. The girl’s head then appeared above the counter. “Found it,” she said as she held up a bottle of amber liquid that was a good match for her eyes. She stepped out of the kitchen with both it and a pair of glasses clutched in her hands and nodded with her head towards a pair of two-seat sofas separated by a low glass coffee table. 

He followed her lead and they sat down opposite one another. Matt watched as Teiko set the glasses on the table, unscrewed the bottle cap and poured an equal measure into each. She slid one over to him, which he caught before it had the chance to test gravity.

“To friends of old/ex friends,” she said and raised her glass.

He followed suit, “to friends of old/ex friends.”

They downed the shots and set the glasses back down on the table. While it may have been rude to do so in someone else’s home, Matt reached out a hand and took control of the bottle. Granted, given that Teiko still had her boots on, she did not strike him as the sort to stand on ceremony. His host simply smiled at him as he used the fingertips of his free hand to bring both glasses together. He poured two shots, sat the bottle down and tested her reflexes this time as he slid the glass across the table surface; she stopped it with a single finger.

“So, how’s Takenouchi?” Teiko then asked.

The question caught him off guard and made him feel like he had just been poked with a cattle prod. In a momentary burst of anger, he slammed his fist down on the sofa arm. “Son of a…” he cursed under his breath upon the discovery that the padding was wafer thin.

“You might want to avoid doing that,” the girl said with a light laugh. “You wouldn’t be the first person who’s wrist bone that bastard has claimed.”

Matt shook his hand as the pain started to subside. “No kidding.”

“So, how’s Takenouchi?”

“Why do you care?” he spat and picked up his drink. Ingesting alcohol was good for pain.

“Well, first I wanted to see if you’d try your luck against the sofa arm again,” she replied with a grin, clearly unfazed by his icy tone.

It occurred to Matt that she seemed slightly disappointed that he hadn’t.

“And secondly, last I heard, you two were an item.”

“Yeah, well, your intel’s out of date. That bitch broke up with me on Monday,” he answered, his voice still sounding cold.

“Good to know,” Teiko said as she picked up her glass. “Good riddance to bad bitches then.”

“I’ll certainly drink to that.”

The glasses were drained and promptly returned to the table, where Taiko reclaimed control of the bottle. While she poured, Matt asked, “you said bitches, plural?”

“You’re not the only one who ditched a shitty girlfriend in the past two weeks,” she replied and sat the bottle down.

“You do girls?” he asked in slight alarm. If she was a lesbian, why the hell had she invited him back?

His immediate shock must have shown on his face, for Teiko then said with a seductive smile, “I do guys too. I find that both sexes have their own unique qualities that I enjoy.”

“How about your roommate,” he asked offhandedly, his eyes wandering to where the crotch-less underwear from earlier sat on the back of the other sofa.

“She almost exclusively bat’s for the fairer sex. However, these,” to his horror, she reached out a hand and picked up the wet-look thong, “are mine.”

All Matt could do was watch as she twirled them around her finger, a look of wicked amusement on her face. Then, without warning, she flicked them at him. Totally unprepared, they hit him straight in the face and fell into his lap. Utterly mortified, he hastily grabbed them in the lightest grip he could and threw them aside. Across from him, Teiko had burst into a fit of hysterics.

“That wasn’t funny!” he exclaimed hotly when he could eventually form words.

“It’ll teach you not to ogle a ladies underwear,” she said with an evil grin.

“You shouldn’t leave things like that lying around!”

“Look me in the eye and tell me you’ve never left a pair of boxers lying on the sofa before going out.”

Matt opened his mouth to tell her exactly that, but stopped in his tracks upon the realisation that it would be a downright lie.

“Case and point,” Teiko said with a gleam of triumph in her amber eyes. “Besides, my roommate really enjoys it when I wear those.”

“Do you two…?” Matt asked with interest.

“What? Fuck each other silly when the mood strikes us?” she asked and he knew that she sensed his discomfort.

It had nothing to do with them being the same sex, rather with just how brazen she was being when it came to talking about the subject in general. He’d never met anyone this open in his life. And somewhere in the back of his brain, beneath the light fog that the bourbon had started to cause, he had a suspicion that he might want to be careful around this girl. For he got the impression that handling her would be like trying to hold a wild flame. When he failed to answer, she called him out on his feelings of unease.

“You got a problem with two girls fucking each other?” Her tone was sharp and he knew that a wrong answer here would probably see him out the door soon after.

“No,” Matt said in a manner that indicated he found the suggestion mildly offensive. “People should be able to have relationships with who they like.”

What looked like a relived smile formed on Teiko’s lips. It seemed that she was glad not to be kicking him out. “So it’s just how openly I’ll talk about talking a big black strap-on and fucking my roommate senseless that makes you uncomfortable?”

Matt swallowed a large lump in his throat as the image of her doing just that to a girl that resembled, Sora floated into his mind; he could analyse that one once sober. Maybe this was just the bourbon talking, but while this girl seemed to be completely wild, he found her more alluring by the minute. And if he played his cards right, she might even wear her sexy looking crotch-less undies for him.

The sound of her laughter drew him out of his alcohol induced fantasy and back to reality. “I suppose I could train you to get used to it,” she said and flashed him another wicked grin. “However, for now I’ll put it a way that you can understand, my roommate and I are very good friends with very good benefits.”

Matt picked up his glass and decided to take a bit of initiative. “To very good friends,” he said and gave her a knowing smile.”

“With very good benefits,” Teiko finished and they downed the shots.

Their glasses hit the table with a dual thunk and he reached for the bottle only for her to beat him to it. “So, speaking of very good friends,” she said as she brought the glasses together, “what happened between you and Kamiya?”

For the second time that evening Matt felt a surge of anger, however, he managed to resist the temptation to hit another section of the sofa. In part because his hand still remembered the last time, but also because he could see Teiko’s amber eyes watching him with interest. No doubt she wished to see if he would do it again. He gave her a hard look, “hasn’t he already given you that story?”

“He’s given me **his **version of events, now I want **yours**,” she asked, sounding genuinely intrigued.

If it had not been for the fact that, sitting there clad in those tight pvc trousers and electric blue halter top, she looked smoking hot, combined with the fact that his mind had already imagined her naked, he would probably have told her to fuck off. As it were… “I suppose it all starts with his bitch of a sister dating my brother, then ripping his heart out.”

“Well, at least you agree on something,” Teiko said in amusement. “Although not about the bitch part.”

He scowled at her, but continued anyway. “So, a week after that happened, I’d agreed to meet my brother at his school after my day finished. We were planning on going to blow off some steam at the arcade. Something to try and take his mind off of his bad breakup.”

“I’d want to let off steam just from being trapped inside Odaiba Middle School for a full day,” she laughed.

“Anyway,” Matt emphasised, indicating that if she wanted to hear the story, she should stop interrupting. “I arrived in time to see Kamiya kicking TK. I yelled at him to try and get him to explain, but the bastard just wouldn’t listen. In the end, I had to jump in and take him down. However, one of the middle school teachers arrived on the scene and stopped me before I could do any serious damage.”

“So how does Takenouchi fit into it?” Teiko then asked, pouring another two shots. This action led Matt to wonder if she thought the booze would be necessary come the end of the story.

“That bitch?” he snorted in contempt. “Kamiya and I were both interested in her at the same time that fight occurred. She made her decision and chose me a few days after it happened.” A thin smile involuntarily spread across his lips. While he couldn’t care less for Sora now, he still enjoyed the fact he’d got one over on Tai. “Let’s just say Kamiya was not happy when he found out. However, that was nothing compared with how his bitch of a sister reacted when she found out.”

Teiko tilted her head, a look of intrigue having formed on her face. “He didn’t tell me that part,” she said with interest.

Matt let out a snort of laughter. “That’s because he continually deludes himself into thinking his sister’s this perfect little angel.”

“Then do tell.”

He gave her a funny look. Anyone that new Tai had typically had their ear talked off about how great Kari was, that they would vouch for her without ever having met her. “Alright,” he replied cautiously, not willing to trust that he’d actually found someone that might listen to an alternative take on the bearer of light. “Kari appeared at our school the Friday after Sora and I hooked up. Since I wasn’t talking to her brother, I had no idea why. Regardless of the reason, we passed them on the way out of the building. Kari takes one look at Sora and marches over and starts yelling at her about how much she hurt her brother. They start arguing and then all of a sudden Kari lashes out at her and a fight begins.”

“Did you try to stop them?” Teiko interjected.

He let out a short, sharp, “Ha! You think I’m stupid enough to get between two girls when their fighting? No, I stood back and shouted at them to knock it off, but they didn’t listen.”

“And Kamiya?”

“He might be an idiot, but even he isn’t that thick,” he replied, recalling that Tai had done exactly the same thing he had.

“Some brave men you two are!” the turquoise haired girl said far too exuberantly; the alcohol now clearly taking affect. “So who won?”

“It ended when Sora hit the dirt after Kari had clawed the left-hand-side of her face,” he answered. He could still recall clearly, the image of the red-head on her knees with the other girl standing over her. “Kamiya dragged his sister away at that point, while I had to take Sora to the hospital to get those damn claw marks sutured. She was lucky not to scar.”

“Hmm, I wouldn’t have thought Kari had it in her. Granted I’ve only met her once.”

“You and the rest of the world. Everyone always swallows Tai’s bullshit about her.” The temptation to hit the sofa resurfaced and so Matt picked up his drink in order to occupy his hand. It seemed the girl’s intuition had been right, he did need it. “Anyway, it doesn’t matter anymore. Takenouchi and I are done. Kamiya can have her for all I care.” He downed the shot.

A playful smile danced on Teiko’s lips as she reached out and picked up her own drink. “He doesn’t want her,” she said and emptied her glass.

A look of confusion formed on Matt’s face and he could not help but ask, “what do you mean he doesn’t want her?”

The look that formed on Teiko’s face as she gathered the glasses in and picked up the bottle was one of impish delectation. “Just as I said, he doesn’t want her.”

He shook his head and laughed. “Come off it. Kamiya was interested in her before I was. He just didn’t act quick enough at the right moment.”

Teiko gave him a sweet smile as she refilled the glasses, sloshing some of the bourbon on the table in the process. “If you say so.” She slid his glass over to him, but her aim was off, forcing him to clumsily shoot his hand out to stop it skidding off the corner. “Whoops,” she said with a laugh. “You were almost drinking that one off the floor.”

Part of him wondered if she’d done that deliberately as he pinched the bridge of his nose. If he had been sober, he would probably have ignored the bait she dangled in front of him. Alas, he was not. “Why doesn’t he want her? Is he still pissed at her for choosing me? It’s not as if he asked her out and she rejected him.”

“Nope,” Teiko replied playfully as she swirled her bourbon around with enough vigour that it licked the rim of the glass.

“Then what’s the deal?” he asked, shifting his position on the couch and realising that he no longer had much precision over where his limbs went.

She leaned over the coffee table and beckoned him to do the same. Swaying slightly, Matt did so until their faces were only inches apart. Teiko smiled at him and moved her head to the side. “He’s in love with someone else,” she whispered in his ear. Although in her inebriated condition it came out with about as much subtlety as a jackhammer.

“No way!” Matt exclaimed in disbelief; also have trouble in the discretion department. “He was totally into Takenouchi.”

A devilish smile danced on Teiko’s lips. “He might have been into her then, but he certainly isn’t now. Like I said, he’s in love, but not with her.”

He gave her a sceptical look. “Given that you still thought I was dating Takenouchi, I’m not trusting your sources.”

“You don’t trust Kamiya to know his own mind?”

Matt tilted his head. “Kamiya told you himself?” he asked. When sober, he probably wouldn’t have given a rats ass, but in his present state he found the idea that Tai was in love with someone other than Sora to be most intriguing.

“Yep.”

“Alright then, I bite, who is it?” he asked.

Teiko moved her head to his ear again. “Now that would be telling,” she said in a sultry voice.

“Aww come on,” Matt replied in a charming tone. “I’m sure I can make it worth your while.”

Had he been sober, the look the turquoise haired girl gave him would have quickly made him retract the offer. “Well, my roommate is out of town for the weekend and I did just ditch my last girlfriend. I suppose I could use a playmate for the next few days.”

Teiko then sat back and flexed her joints, giving him a clear view of just how tight her trousers were around her groin. Matt felt a warm sensation in his pants and was vaguely aware that she’d just enticed an erection from him. After the shitty week he’d just had, he could use some serious relaxation time and the thought of spending the weekend alone with this smoking hot girl sounded like heaven.

“I suppose my schedule will clear,” he replied, managing to restrain himself from jumping at the offer.

“Then let’s have some fun,” Teiko said and raised her glass.

Matt followed suit. “Let’s have some fun. But first, tell me who Kamiya’s in love with.”

The girl downed her drink and just as he had poured the contents of his own glass into his mouth, she answered, “his sister.”

Matt spluttered as he tried to swallow and exclaim, “WHAT!” at the same time. The bourbon burned the back of his throat and he descended into a coughing fit. His eyes watered and it took a few moments before he could see straight again. The sight of a glass of water being held out in front of him was the first thing he could properly make out when his vison cleared.

“Here,” Teiko said with a light chuckle.

Matt took the glass and drank deeply. He coughed again and felt another slight burn in the back of his throat as a trace of bourbon escaped his windpipe. He took a few steadying breaths followed by another drink before saying, “you’ve got to be kidding me!”

“Nope. Kamiya is in love with his sister,” Teiko sing-song’ed.

“Seriously?” Matt said in disbelief. The idea that Tai was in love with Kari was so wrong on so many levels that he had trouble believing that his ex-friend could be capable of such depravity. However, one glance into the girls amber eyes told him that she was not bluffing. “That’s sick!” he exclaimed loudly, feeling completely repulsed by the idea.

“You can’t help who you fall in love with,” the girl countered. “Although I’ll let your intolerance slide on that one, given that the vast majority of people would agree with you.”

“You think it’s ok?” he asked, his tone still holding an edge. He’d gathered that she was quite liberal, but sibling incest might be taking things too far.

“Like I said, you can’t help who you fall in love with. Besides, despite being taboo, it’s actually perfectly legal in this country. Though not that it matters.”

Matt gave her a quizzical look, “what do you mean it doesn’t matter?”

“It doesn’t matter because his sister doesn’t feel the same way.”

He let out a hollow laugh as he listened to her explanation.

“What’s funny?” Teiko asked curiously.

“Of all the people I know, if any of them had a brother complex, it would be Kari Kamiya,” he answered. Through the bourbon induced haze, that was seriously starting to thicken, images flashed of times he could recall Kari showing slightly more affection for her brother than was healthy. At the times in question, he’d been forced to conclude that his viewpoint was skewed because his relationship with TK was not nearly as strong (for obvious reasons) as the one between the Kamiya siblings. And since no one else had ever questioned it, neither had he. Could Kari possibly feel the same way for Tai as he apparently did for her?

“Maybe there’s hope for Tai after all. They would make such a cute couple,” Teiko gave him an unnerving smile, “don’t you think.”

“No!” he exclaimed, the thought of it sending a chill down his spine. He did not want to be stuck with an image of Tai and Kari snogging, or worse, for the remainder of the night.

Teiko laughed and poured out another two shots. “I guess their love for each other will just have to exist inside the heads of weirdo’s like me.” She held his glass out to him. “It’s the last of the bottle. Why don’t we finish it, then you can hold up your side of the bargain?”

Matt took the offered glass. “Sounds good to me.

“To the forbidden love of the Kamiya siblings,” she laughed.

He shook his head, “whatever.”

Simultaneously, they drank the last of the bourbon, then sat the empty glasses beside the now equally empty bottle. Matt swayed slightly as he watched Teiko have slight difficulty in getting to her feet. She really was seriously hot and he might just have her for the whole weekend. The girl edged around the table and held her hand out to him and he took it gladly.

“Ready for some fun?” she asked with a devilish grin and ran a slender hand down his left cheek.

“I thought you’d never ask.”

Shakily he got to his feet and allowed her to lead him across the apartment towards what he assumed must be her bedroom. She opened the door onto a dark room and ushered him inside. Stepping across the threshold, Matt could feel her close behind him and soon heard the sound of the door closing.

“Give me a sec to get the light,” Teiko said and he could hear her hand fumbling in the darkness. “It’s much easier to do sober!”

A few moments later the lights came on and his eyes widened. “What the...” was all he could whisper in sheer disbelief at the sight before him. What the hell had he gotten himself into?

One thing was for certain, despite the copious amount of bourbon, Matt was not likely going to forget tonight for a very long time.


	47. Pt4 01) Marooned

**Part Four: A Secret Discovered**

**Chapter One: Marooned **

It was mid-December and the first snowfall of the season had occurred two days ago but had been nothing more than a light flutter that had not lain. However, the air temperature had been dropping steadily for weeks. To the point that the default was now somewhere between chilly and very cold. Kari Kamiya felt an icy wind sting her cheeks as she rounded a corner and cycled towards her apartment building. Despite the fact her skin felt freezing, she had no desire to reach home. Granted, she’d had little desire to be anywhere these past four weeks, except the one place she could not. Four weeks… had it only been that long? To her it felt more like four lifetimes. Four lifetimes since she had last smiled or laughed. Four lifetimes since she had felt anything the remotely resembled a positive emotion… Four lifetimes since she had last been within Tai’s embrace.

Ever since that fateful night down at the water’s edge, she had felt nothing but sorrow, pain and misery. And had barely said two words to her brother. Just seeing him on a daily basis served as too much of a painful reminder of what she had lost. Did he feel the same way? She hoped not. She could not bear the idea of Tai feeling a shred of what she currently did. Not to mention that if he did, she would be entirely to blame. If not for that singular lapse of reason all those months ago, when she had first kissed him, then he would have remained ignorant of his own feelings. In the end, unrequited love on her part would have been better than two shattered hearts.

“Oh, Tai,” Kari whispered in anguish, her eyes starting to water. There had not been a day since their breakup that she had not shed at least one tear.

HONK! Kari’s feet slipped off the pedals and eyes shot to her left. Frozen in place, she could do nothing but watch as the truck struggled to come to a stop. The grill on the front came to within mere inches of her face when eventually it did.

“What the hell are you doing, Kid?” the irate driver yelled at her from the cab, not bothering to get out to see if she was ok.

“I’m sorry,” Kari cried as she burst into tears.

“Well, get out of the way, you’re holding up the traffic!”

Hesitantly, limbs shaking from the shock of having almost been run over, she climbed off of her bike and slowly pushed it onto the nearest sidewalk. Not trusting herself to cycle the short distance that remained between here and home. One thing was for certain. If the driver of the truck had not noticed her in time, she would probably have been killed. It came as a slight surprise how little that realisation seemed to bother her. Perhaps death would be preferable. For she could imagine no hell worse than what she was currently living. Even rewinding the clock to before Tai had discovered her secret would not be this bad.

Dejected and downtrodden, Kari wheeled her bike into the undercroft and locked it away. Removing a tissue from her bag, she dried her eyes before heading up the stairs. Crossing the short distance to her apartment, she opened the door and closed it as quietly as she could. Changing her shoes, she stepped lightly into the main living area. Not wishing to alert her mother to her presence until she could safely make it to her bedroom without the woman seeing her undoubtedly blotchy face. She passed the kitchen but saw no sign of her.

“I home, Mom,” she called out when she reached her bedroom door.

“Hi, Honey, how was your day?” her mother asked from what sounded like the bathroom.

Agonisingly, Kari wanted to reply with the truth. To tell her mom… anyone about the hell she was living. Only she couldn’t. No one could ever find out about her relationship with Tai. So she was left with little choice but to say, “tiring and cold. I’ve got a lot of homework that I need to make a start on and don’t feel very hungry, do you mind if I have dinner later on?”

“Are you feeling ok?” her mother asked suspiciously.

“I’m fine, Mom. It wasn’t that cold.”

“Ok then. I’ll leave it on the stove for you to heat up when you’re ready.”

“Thanks, Mom,” she replied and quickly ducked inside her room.

It was a lie. All of it. She neither had a lot of homework nor was fine. However, she had plenty of experience of acting fake happy or finding ways to circumvent people. Sighing deeply, Kari crossed over to her desk and sat her school bag down on the floor beside it. From inside she fished out her headphones and music player and placed them on the neat wooden surface. Turning, she caught sight of her reflection in the mirrored panel of the wardrobe door. Since she had first noticed her brown roots four weeks ago, her hair had grown by almost an inch. Leaving her with an unsightly brown patch amidst the bright orange on the top of her head. Her gaze fell away as she let out a moan. Last Friday, she had stood in the bathroom with the brown hair dye her mother had bought and almost reverted her hair to normal. Because every time she caught sight of herself in a mirror, she was reminded of that fateful day when she had kissed Tai. Of her brother's kindness and of his love. Yes, her own hair had become a monument to all she’d had… and lost. She’d wrestled with herself for over fifteen minutes, only to throw the bottle against the door in disgust. She hadn’t been able to do it. While her wardrobe choices and personality had virtually reverted back to the Kari of old, she could not bring herself to undo one of the most wonderful things Tai had ever done for her. So her hair remained like a lit match. But so too did the pain she felt every time she saw her own reflection.

Kari sat down in her chair and pulled her maths notebook and textbook from her schoolbag; the only work she actually had to do. Withdrawing her pencil tin, she opened it up only to remember that she’d thrown the one she had been using away earlier in the day; it had become too small to use. Tossing the tin aside, she opened the top desk drawer to get another. Only for her gaze to fall upon her sketchbook. Wistfully she picked it up and began flicking through. This too felt like it had belonged to a previous life. Had she really dressed like this only a matter of weeks ago? She reached the last design, the red vs blue one that Tai had given her one of his favourite shirts for. It existed only on the page.

Standing up, she crossed over to the wardrobe and withdrew the black shirt. Burying her face in it, she took a deep breath in through her nose. It still smelled strongly of fresh grass, honey and lavender… of Tai. Kari slipped it on over the top of her school uniform. She’d worn it several times when in desperate need of her brother’s touch. Returning to the desk, she closed the sketchbook over and returned it to the drawer. In her present state of mind, she could not even envisage a time when she would have the confidence to dress in any of those outfits again. She almost broke down into tears there and then. Was this how TK had felt when she’d broken his heart? Like his entire life had fallen apart around him and that he had no will to try and stop it. In the end, maybe she deserved this. Her karma for having strung him along for a year before wrenching his heart out.

Her math homework forgotten, Kari picked up her headphones and slipped them on. Like her hair, the music she listened to was one of the few things that had not reverted, having been part of old Kari for almost a year before the emergence of her Digital Punk self. Flicking through the albums on her music player, she found the latest addition to her collection; Pink Floyd’s The Wall. The weekend after her breakup with Tai, she had needed to get out of the apartment that badly, she had gone into town alone. Inevitably, she had found herself in Iowa’s shop and bought a copy. She had played it almost daily since. Finding the plight of the protagonist and his building of a mental wall to try and spare himself from his emotional pain, eerily relatable.

Moving from the desk, Kari sat down on the floor with her back against her bedframe and huddled her knees to her chest. This had become a common position for her to sit in over the past few weeks. Especially on a bad day such as today. She missed Tai more than she would ever have thought possible. The quiet opening notes of the first track began and she quickly shoved the volume up to maximum, just in time for the heavy drums and guitars to obliterate the calm. Kari felt all thoughts temporarily blown out of her mind by the wall of sound that crashed over her. She loved the sheer energy of this track. However, it soon came to an end as the album settled down into a slightly less harsh rhythm.

Kari’s thoughts slowly began to seep back into her brain and she could feel her pain return. Her momentary reprieve now over. She wanted to talk to Tai so badly. To tell him that she had made a mistake. That having had him and then given him up was worse than she could ever have imagined. Except she couldn’t. Her brother only had one month until he sat his university admission test and had to remain focused. The last thing he needed was her to start gushing over him and throw his mind into doubt.

The music continued to play and Kari sunk deeper inside her own mind. This was her burden… her punishment. And she would have to bear it alone.


	48. Pt4 02) Brainstorm

**Part Four: A Secret Discovered**

**Chapter Two: Brainstorm**

It had just gone midnight and the cold wind that had swept through the Odaiba streets during the day now carried with it icy raindrops. In the large apartment building that housed the Kamiya residence, lights had slowly been going out until only one remained. From a bedroom, the illumination from a small lamp was the only thing holding back the darkness. Tai sat at his desk, virtually unaware that everyone else in the vicinity had already gone to sleep.

Absentmindedly, his hand reached out and picked up a can of some energy drink. With the same scattiness, he took a long drink. He’d practically been surviving on these for the past three weeks, ever since he had received his college acceptance letters. Very much to his surprise, he had been offered a full soccer scholarship to both Tokyo **and **Kyoto University. The only catch was his university admission test score. Seventy-percent would see him into Tokyo and seventy-five, Kyoto. While he now knew where the goalposts were, it had meant redoubling his efforts. However, it had come at a cost of sleep… and Kari.

Tai felt his mind uncontrollably slip onto his sister, causing his pen to drag across the page. “Damn it,” he cursed. His broken concentration led to the discovery that he now sat in a small bubble of light amidst a sea of darkness. His eyes flickered to his cell phone, which sat on silent; 00:05 am. Great, he thought, another night when he would not likely get to sleep before one in the morning. Frowning to himself at the lack of noise, he picked up his music player and saw that the album he had been listening to had finished. When had that happened? He had no idea.

Tai glanced down at the dirty score that now ran through his work and tried to recall what exactly he had been working on. However, his mind offered him something else instead. The image of his sister at the breakfast table that morning. He had barely seen her since their breakup conversation but knew that she was suffering. Like him, she had been spending most of her time alone in her bedroom. On school nights, she had stopped changing out of her uniform and on weekends, on the rare occasions that he saw her, she had reverted to wearing unaltered clothes that their mom had bought her. If his heart had not already been shattered into a thousand pieces, it would have broken upon seeing her this way. At the time, he could never have imagined that their breakup would have such a drastic effect on her.

Kari was not alone in her suffering. For he too had struggled to pick himself back up in the aftermath of that horrible night. He’d cried and felt absolutely no shame about doing so. How could he not, having given up the single greatest thing in existence? The first few days after the event had been some of the most painful and miserable of Tai’s life. So much so, that he had even contemplated cutting himself again. Fortunately, he’d resisted temptation and eventually transferred the urge to a new stress ball and his music. While it did nothing to lessen the pain, it at least became manageable. Over and over, he had pondered whether or not he and Kari had made the right choice. To the point that it almost consumed him. Hell, he’d even got as far as his hand on the handle of her bedroom door, down the path to asking her if she too felt they had made a mistake. Except overprotective big brother mode had kicked in at the last moment and stopped him. Everything that they had discussed that night still held true. And he could not inflict further pain on Kari, just so he could try and lessen his own. It was going to be tough he had told himself, but they would just need to ride it out. Eventually, things would settle down.

However, when his college acceptance letters arrived over the following two days, he had found himself staring down the barrel of a metaphorical gun. Either he found a way to focus on his studies or screwed over his entire future. It had been agonising, but he had been forced to put all thoughts of Kari to one side, at least until after he sat his university admission test. Unfortunately, like when he had been struggling with his feelings for her, he had found his sister difficult to budge from his mind. By the third day, he had taken a leaf out of her book and gone to Iowa’s CD store in town.

Aimlessly, he had wandered the store, not a clue what he was looking for. Eventually, a song played over the stores stereo system that caught his ear. Something completely different from Mike Oldfield, Pink Floyd or anything else he had ever heard. Furious and heavy with boundless energy, yet at the same time so totally out there that it belonged in space. The owner had recognised him when he approached the counter and chuckled to himself when Tai had asked him what had just been playing. Iowa had told him that the band were called Hawkwind and the song, Master of the universe. After a warning that he might find his mind blown clean out of his body, coincidently exactly what Tai was looking for, the man had taken him over to the relevant section and suggested one of the bands live albums; Space Ritual. The reason for this transpired to be twofold. One, many fans considered the band to be better live than in the studio. And two, it contained a version of the aforementioned track. Trusting that the man knew his stuff, he’d bought it. On his way out the door, Iowa had told him that, if he could get his head around it, to come back and he would help him delve into the band's extensive studio discography.

Loud, relentless and at times just plain bonkers, Space Ritual had done as warned and blown Tai’s mind into orbit. Succeeding in taking it off of Kari in the process. Indeed, had it not been so effective at doing the job, he would probably have found a way to open a portal to the dark ocean, chucked the album inside and sealed it shut. Instead, he had played it at the start of each evenings study session for a week. Like when he had been learning to ride a bicycle, patience had paid off and he had found himself hooked. Two subsequent trips to Iowa’s had seen him return with copies of Hall Of The Mountain Grill and In Search Of Space.

It was the former album that Tai selected on his music player as he got out of his chair. Even though it was already after midnight, he knew he would not sleep for about an hour yet. His mind was still too awake. Changing into his pyjamas, he lay down on his bed and closed his eyes. The spacy music filled his mind, but he allowed himself to think about Kari. The vibe his sister had given off had not felt good this morning. Whether through sheer necessity on his part, or something unknown on hers, today had made it abundantly clear that she was suffering far more than him at present. But what could he possibly do for her? After all, he was the problem. Should he try talking to her, gauge how she felt about their breakup? Or would that only make things worse? Maybe he should try spending time with her as her brother. Tai thought about this for a moment. There was no guarantee that wouldn’t be just as bad; a hard reminder of constraints once more placed upon them. Not to mention that at present, he barely had time to stop and take a shit.

Tai let out a long sigh. The situation sucked but was of his own making. For he had agreed with Kari that they needed to end things. Allowed their fears to rule them and coerce them into making the decision to break their own hearts. Unfortunately, if anything, the breakup had only fuelled the love he felt for her. He couldn’t help it. He, Tai Kamiya, was madly in love with his sister, Kari. And the thought of not being with her made him ache inside in ways he could never have thought possible. Yet this was the path they had chosen. To be alone and quell their feelings, in order to spare each other the possibility of greater pain further down the line. In a sudden burst of rage, Tai slammed his fist against the wall. He was supposed to be the bearer of courage, damn it! However, had chosen the cowards way out. As his breaths came through gritted teeth, he felt the throb of pain in his hand. A reminder of the reality of the situation. He had not made the decision for himself, but rather for Kari. Only he could see first-hand just how well that was panning out.

What was he going to do? The question resurfaced time and again over the duration of the album, but he came up with precious few other answers. By the time the last track, the aptly named Paradox, finished, the best he had been able to come up with was that, if he could not risk spending time with Kari at present, he at least needed to do something to let her know he still thought about her… that he still cared. Removing his earbuds, he sat his music player down on the nightstand. It seemed he would need to run into town tomorrow after school to pay Iowa a visit. Setting his alarm clock, he rolled over and closed his eyes. These next few weeks, in the lead up to his university admissions test, could not pass soon enough. 


	49. Pt4 03) Close to the edge

**Part Four: A Secret Discovered**

**Chapter Three: Close to the edge**

Time was wearing on, but Kari Kamiya did not care. In fact, if you were to ask her, she would not have been able to tell you it at present. When the chime to signal the end of school had sounded, she had robotically packed away her things, stood up from her chair, tucked it in beneath her desk and walked out of the classroom without a word to anyone. In the hallway she had ignored the calls of three people, one of whom had been a teacher and another possibly Yolei, she did not really know, and made her way to the exit. Outside, she had headed straight to the main gate, leaving her bicycle in the bike racks and started to walk. She’d had no conscious destination in mind but eventually found herself beneath the bridge at the water’s edge. The location of her worst memory.

Images flashed before Kari and she could see clearly, as though it were happening right now, ghostly apparitions of herself and Tai sitting on the slab of concrete. She watched on while echoed fragments of the conversation played in her mind.

_“…I’m sorry for losing control of myself seven weeks ago and kissing you. For then telling you my secret and all the pain and trouble it has put you through since.”_

_“…Why are you apologising for telling me your secret and for what’s happened since?”_

_“Because you would have been better off never finding out. If you’d remained ignorant, you probably would have found someone to be happy with, eventually. All I’ve done is cause you pain and hurt and I am so, so sorry for all of it.”_

In silence, Kari stood, transfixed by the construct of her own mind. The harsh reality of the situation, that this was no creation of her imagination, driven home with each ethereal word, like a hammer hitting a stake through her heart.

_“Have you thought about the future, Tai? About what possible long-term future there is for us?”_

_“No. Not beyond the immediate future and how we keep this a secret from mom and dad.”_

_“I hadn’t either… until tonight… I’ve been so focused on keeping it a secret, that I hadn’t realised the truth.”_

_“What truth, Kari?”_

_“That if we want to be together, we can’t keep it a secret…”_

Hot tears began to well up in Kari’s eyes as the scene continued to play out. This was the heart of the matter. The truth she had come to realise and that she’d feared. No matter what way you washed it, that horrid stain remained. If she wanted a long-term relationship with Tai, it could not remain a secret. Only it had transpired that the alternative was worse.

_“…so what happens now?”_

_“I don’t know… I’ve wanted this for so long that I can’t bear the thought of giving it up. But at the same time…”_

_“You don’t know if you can bear the pain that it’ll bring. Are the sporadic highs that we can have worth the long periods when we can’t be together? Not to mention everything that comes later on if we were to make it that far.”_

Two wet lines streaked down Kari’s cheeks and she opened her mouth to yell at the phantom image of herself. How desperately she wanted to scream that it would be worth it, that the alternative was more painful than she could possibly imagine. However, she could only watch on, helpless, as those final moments played out. And she felt the anguish of her heart breaking all over again.

_“If we do this, will it break your heart?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“That makes two of us...”_

_“…Kiss me… one last time.”_

“NO!” Kari cried out as she was forced to relive the final moments of her relationship with Tai end with a singular kiss. She could not bear this… the hurt… the pain… the agony. After two years of longing and driving herself to the brink of insanity, against all possible odds and in defiance of logic, she had somehow got the one thing she had yearned for more than anything else in her life. And over three weeks, she had enjoyed the greatest moments of her life. Albeit separated by torturous days of torment… She would take those now. She would endure anything if it meant she could be with Tai. For not having him had transpired to be far worse. Only she couldn’t. She had allowed her fear to overcome her and convinced her brother that they needed to end their relationship. Given it all up because she had not been strong enough to accept the cost of their long-term future. A cost that she might be willing to pay now. Except it did not matter. She had made her choice and would not put herself upon her brother. Not so close to his university entrance exam.

The ghostly apparitions of herself and Tai were gone now and Kari was left alone in the cold December air. The shards of her broken heart felt like knives as they stabbed into her. She had to do something, for the pain was now too much to bear. Involuntarily, her mind thought back to yesterday and the near-miss with the truck. Why could it not have just hit her? It would all have been over then.

“If you want it all to be over, then do it yourself,” the thought flittered through her mind and a shiver ran down her spine.

“…” no argument was forthcoming to counter the thought.

“Turn around, Kari.”

Hypnotically, as though in a trance, she followed the instruction.

“Good,” the thought came in a calm, almost soothing tone. Like it was lulling her to sleep. “You see it, don’t you?”

“Yes,” Kari whispered aloud, her tear-stained eyes finding the dark surface of the water.

“Then walk to the edge.”

She began to walk, now completely under the spell cast by her own thoughts.

“That’s it, Good Girl.”

Kari reached the edge and her eyes looked down into the steady current as it made its way out towards Tokyo Bay. The water’s depths looked so dark she could not help but be reminded of the dark ocean. In the back of her mind, she recalled having a similar thought before but quickly ignored it. There was little point dwelling on something that mattered nought anymore.

“Just one more step, Kari, and it’ll all be over... All you need to do is lean forward…”

_“I… c…c…can't,”_ a voice from the depths of her mind cried out as one of her tears hit the water’s surface.

“You can. Just lean forward. You want the pain to go away, don’t you?”

_“Y…y…yes, b…b…but…”_

“Then do it,” the thought had an edge to it, something harsh that cut through the soft lulling tone.

_“N…n…no. I…I…I…”_

“Do it, Kari. Do it now.”

_“B…B…But…”_ the voice stammered helplessly.

“DO IT!”

Kari closed her eyes and leaned forward. This was it. It would all be over soon…

…Except she didn’t fall. No dark icy water’s swirled around her. Instead, she felt a strong arm wrapped around her waist. The suddenness of it all enough to shock her out of her trance. What had she almost done? “Tai,” she whispered to herself, her mind superimposing the image of her brother onto her rescuer.

“Careful, young Lady, you almost fell in.”

Turning her head, Kari gazed into the kind eyes of her rescuer; it wasn’t Tai. She had no idea who this middle-aged man was. “I’m sorry,” she breathed, not really knowing what else to say.

“No need to say sorry, young Lady. Are you ok?” the man asked.

Taking his offered hand, Kari allowed him to lead her away from the water’s edge. “I think so,” she lied. In truth, she was in no way shape or form ok. If not for the man’s timely intervention, she would have thrown herself into the water and more than likely to her death. And she knew that part of her would have preferred that outcome. “I just got lost in thought and must have lost my balance.”

The man gave her a sideways look and she knew that he had seen the tear lines on her face. “Are you sure?” he asked, not sounding like he believed her. “Would you like me to call someone to come get you?”

She desperately wanted to give him her phone and ask him to call her brother but knew she couldn’t. Tai would be busy studying and he did not need the distraction of having to come and get her, followed by the discovery that she had almost committed suicide. She gave a brief thought instead to her parents but quickly rejected the idea. There would be too many awkward questions that she did not have the mental capacity to think up suitable lies for. So instead, she replied, “no thank you. I’ll be fine.”

“Are you absolutely certain?”

“Yes. I think I want to go home now,” Kari replied, feeling the need to surround herself with the safety of her bedroom walls. “Thank you for your help. I really need to learn to be more careful.”

The man gave her one last look up and down. Perhaps considering whether or not she would return to the edge the moment he was out of sight. However, he eventually said, “well, if you’re sure.”

“I am. Thank you once again.” She bowed her head in appreciation of his help.

“Be careful, young Lady,” the man said with a nod, before uttering, “goodbye.”

“Goodbye,” she said softly and watched him walk away.

Taking one last look at the dark depths of the water, Kari headed for the steps and climbed back up to street level. Not even bothering to check the time, she started off in the direction of home.


	50. Pt4 04) On the run

**Part Four: A Secret Discovered**

**Chapter Three: On the run**

Tai Kamiya raced between the two long queues of stationary traffic as fast as his legs could pump the pedals of his red bicycle; the advantage of two wheels. Much to his teacher's chagrin, he had skipped his after school study class. Receiving a look upon leaving the room, that clearly asked whether or not he intended to take his university entrance test seriously. Last night’s heavy rain had fortunately subsided just before lunchtime, however, the roads were still quite wet. Resulting in him almost skidding into oncoming traffic on two occasions. He had been pushing the limits of both his legs and sanity in order to make it to the CD shop before it closed.

Slipping through a gap in the oncoming traffic, Tai turned up the small side street on which Iowa’s store resided. Slowing his pace, he came to a stop and chained his bike to the nearest lamppost. Ironically, he had probably come here more frequently than Kari had recently. The pleasant tinkle of the doorbell rang as he opened it, drawing the attention of the ageing shopkeeper.

A smile spread across the man’s face. “Good afternoon, Brother of Pretty Girl.”

“Good afternoon, Iowa,” Tai replied with a small chuckle, it seemed he would forever be stuck with that title whenever he came in here. It didn’t bother him. The shopkeeper, like Kari had said on his first trip here, was indeed a really nice person and exceptionally helpful.

“Ah,” the man then said as he quickly bustled around to the other side of the counter. “I have just the thing for you today.”

“Actually, Iowa, I need to ask you something.”

The man stopped and gave him a quizzical look, “certainly, ask away.”

“My sister is in need of cheering up, so I was hoping you could help me pick out something that she doesn’t already have.”

“You’re a very caring young man,” Iowa said warmly. “I’d be more than happy to help.” The shopkeeper indicated for Tai to follow him and set off towards the rock and pop section. “I have not seen the Pretty Girl for a few weeks now. However, last time she was here, she bought a copy of Pink Floyd’s The Wall.”

That must have been just after they’d broke up, Tai mused. “Is there anything in particular that you think she might like?”

The man looked ponderous for a moment, before letting out a low, “ah,” then quickly began flicking through the P’s, withdrawing two CD’s and then the O’s, withdrawing one. “She’s not had a new album by Mr Oldfield for a while, so this one would be perfect,” he held up a CD titled Guitars. “Or if you would rather get her one by Pink Floyd, either of these, “he indicated one called Meddle and another called The Division Bell, “she should enjoy.”

It was his turn to ponder, as he glanced between the three albums. Then, doing the typical thing when it came to Kari, asked, “how much for all three?”

Iowa looked slightly taken aback, but dutifully totalled up the cost of the three in his head. “¥4,000,” he replied before pausing, “but since you are doing a very nice thing for the Pretty Girl, I can let you have them for ¥3250.”

Tai reached into his pocket, pulled out his wallet and glanced inside. “Perfect,” he said on seeing that he had enough money with him, “I’ll take all three.”

The elderly shopkeeper smiled at him. “The Pretty Girl is very lucky to have you for a brother,” he said and indicated for Tai to follow him back to the front of the store. “You obviously care a lot about her.”

More than you could possibly imagine, he thought as he walked behind the man to the counter. Iowa made his way to the other side and rang up the three CDs. Tai handed over the money and slipped the albums inside his school bag as he waited for his change.

“It is unfortunate that you are not buying for yourself today,” the shopkeeper said as he deposited the coins into Tai’s hand. “I had a gentleman come in the other day to sell me his CD collection. He had a lot of Hawkwind albums, many of which are out of print now. A perfect way for a budding fan to expand his collection.”

“Darn,” he said with a hint of regret. He’d discovered this fact himself when he’d gone online to look at the band's extensive discography. Aside from the three he already had, there was only another three readily available. However, he quickly reaffirmed his decision, “my sister’s need is greater than mine at present.”

Iowa looked ponderous again for a moment. “Tell you what, since you are doing an exceptionally selfless thing for the Pretty Girl, I’ll hold onto them until the next time you come in. Then we can have a look through them and see what takes your fancy.”

Tai nodded his head in appreciation, “thank you. Until next time, Iowa.”

“Until next time, Brother of the Pretty Girl.”

He made his way to the door, only for the man to call out after him, “tell the Pretty Girl that I hope she feels better soon.”

“I will,” he replied as the doorbell rang and he stepped outside.

Pulling out his cell phone, Tai checked the time; 5:05 pm. He needed to get home and start studying. Unlocking his bike, he climbed on and set off once more into the rush hour traffic.

##

“I’m home,” Tai called out when eventually he stepped through the front door of his family’s apartment.

“Hello, Tai,” his mother called out from the direction of the kitchen as he walked into the main living area.

“Is Kari home,” he then asked when the woman came into view.

“No, and I’ve not had any word from her either.” He could hear the disapproval in her voice as she spoke. “Your father’s also running late, something came up at the office that he had to deal with, but at least he had the decency to send me a message.”

Sensing the danger signs, Tai kept walking past the kitchen towards his bedroom. He had no desire to get caught in the blast of his mother’s wrath. Especially when he hadn’t done anything this time.

“Tai,” he froze mid-step on hearing his name being said with a rather sharp edge. “Have you any idea what’s wrong with your sister?”

The question hit him like one of Piedmon’s trump-swords and his spine involuntarily stiffened. It seemed that Kari’s ability to hide her problems had slipped to a point that their mom had taken note. Cautiously, he turned his head, fixing his expression with the best poker face he could muster. “I don’t know,” he said flatly, “we haven’t spoken much recently as I’ve been really busy studying.”

His mom gave him a piercing stare as she ran his words and body language through her lie detector. “You’re sure that you know nothing?” she asked testily, not sounding convinced.

“Sorry, Mom, I wish I could help you, but she hasn’t told me anything,” he lied, trying to convey the fact that he too was concerned about Kari. “Have you tried talking to her?”

“She keeps telling me that everything is fine,” his mom snapped, sounding annoyed that he had questioned whether or not she had tried the obvious. “While I’m relieved that she’s started wearing normal clothes again, she seems to have been unhappy for about a month now. Not to mention that her hair is starting to look unsightly.”

“I don’t know what to say, Mom, but I can’t help you out on this one. However, I have some work to do before dinner. So if you don’t mind, I’m going to go make a start on it.”

The mere mention of his studies served its purpose and she released his gaze. “Of course, Son,” she said in a softer tone, however, failed to hide her dismay. “I’ll call you when dinner is ready.”

“Thanks, Mom,” he said and headed off towards his bedroom.

When he was sure that she had gone back to making dinner, he sneaked over to Kari’s room, slipped inside and placed the three CD’s on her desk. There was no need to leave a note, for she would know immediately who they had come from. Closing her bedroom door quietly, Tai crept back across the hall to his own room. He changed quickly, pulled out his physics textbook and notebook from his bag and sat down at his desk. He gave half a thought to texting Kari to see if she was ok but ultimately rejected the idea. Wherever his sister was, she clearly wanted to be left alone. Popping in his earbuds, he put In Search Of Space on and started to work.


	51. Pt4 05) Crises

**Part Four: A Secret Discovered**

**Chapter Five: Crises**

It was just going five-to-seven when Kari Kamiya finally entered the apartment that evening. After being saved from dropping herself into the river, her mind had been deathly quiet for the duration of her walk home. However, she knew that sooner or later she would have to deal with the part of herself that had tried to end it all and commit suicide. Only she was still in too much shock to even begin processing what exactly had happened.

She had barely managed to take her shoes off before she found herself staring up at her mother. Arms folded, the woman stood at her full height, with an expression that looked like it had been chiselled from granite. In short, she reminded Kari of a grenade that’s pin hung by a thread.

“Where have you been, young Lady,” her mom said in a slow monotone that betrayed the volatility that hid beneath her calm visage.

“Out,” Kari replied quietly as she stepped into the main living area. She didn’t mean to sound glib, just had no idea how else to respond.

The metaphorical grenade pin hit the wooden floor with a low tinkle. “School finished three and a half hours ago, you didn’t have the courtesy to let me know where you were and that’s all you have to say for yourself?” There was a heartbeat of silence. “I’VE BEEN WORRIED SICK ABOUT YOU, YOUNG LADY!”

The force of her mother’s assault was akin to a sledgehammer hitting a pane of reinforced glass. It shattered but remained in its frame; barely. Kari could not cope with this right now. Either she fled to the safety of her room or broke down right here, right now. A Hobson’s choice. Turning her face away from her mother, she quickly stepped around her and headed for her bedroom.

She did not see the momentary look of shock that spread across her mom’s face. However, she was acutely aware of the brief second of deadpan silence that hung in the air, before the woman recovered. “WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU ARE GOING, YOUNG LADY!”

Kari did not turn around or give any indication that she had heard her mother’s yell. This served only to enrage the woman further.

“YOUNG LADY, COME BACK HERE THIS INSTANT.”

Kari had reached the edge of the hall, her bedroom in sight. Just a little further, she told herself. Safety was within touching distance...

“KARI KAMIYA, I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF YOUR ATTITUDE PROBLEM OF LATE. NOW YOU WILL COME BACK HERE AND EXPLAIN YOURSELF...”

This final sledgehammer blow was enough to explode the shards of glass that constituted Kari’s psyche from their frame. Hot tears poured forth and she turned to stare directly at her mother. “And tell you what, Mom?” she yelled in a fractured voice. “That I spent the evening down by the river and tried to throw myself in! Only for some random man to catch me before I fell.”

While her mom was nothing more than a blurry shape through her teary eyes, the stunned silence told Kari that whatever answer she had expected, that hadn’t been it. However, she felt almost as shocked, for she had not meant to blurt out the truth. In the end, she recovered first and hastily darted into her bedroom, locking the door behind her. Pressing her back against the wooden surface, she held her head in her hands as her tears intensified.

It took several moments for Kari to calm down, not helped by the eventual banging on her door by her mother. However, the woman soon gave up and she was left alone with her thoughts. This was a complete disaster. She had just told her mother and indirectly her father, for he would most certainly have heard the commotion, that she had just tried to commit suicide. Worse yet, if Tai was in his bedroom, he may very well have heard her too. At least her mother might decide that it had simply been a lie she had said to try and hurt her or something like that. Her brother, on the other hand, would not brush it aside so easily. Kari let out a ragged breath. Once she had calmed down, her mother would undoubtedly try to come and talk to her again. And sooner or later, whether it was today, tomorrow or next week, she would be forced to talk to her. She would need to come up with something convincing to tell her when that inevitable conversation took place. And hope that Tai had not heard. For he would see through any lie that she tried to pedal to him.

Body on autopilot, Kari walked over to her desk and allowed her bag to fall to the floor. Her gaze passed over the wooden surface and almost paid it no heed until something caught her eye. She stared at the neat stack of CD’s that sat in the centre. “What the...” she trailed off in confusion. For a brief moment she thought her mom must have been going through the CD rack in the living room and thought they were hers, only the feel of the cellophane covering the top one put pay to that as she picked it up. She stared at the cover, depicting a greying man clad in a denim jacket and playing a guitar. The words, Mike Oldfield: Guitars, also adorned the front. She put it down carefully and looked at the other two. The Division Bell and Meddle, both by Pink Floyd. Only one thought filled her mind; Tai. However, this was quickly followed by the question, but why? What on earth did this mean?

Kari felt her knees grow weak and she had to sit down in the chair before they gave way. Why had Tai done this? Had he noticed how downtrodden she’d been and thought she needed cheering up? Surely not. For she had maintained a decent air of fake happy when around others... hadn’t she? Or maybe this was his way of letting her know that he still thought about her... She needed an answer. 

##

The album had just reached the last track when a shadow crossed the page of Tai’s notebook. He looked up and pulled out one of his earbuds.

“Dinner’s ready, Tai,” his mom said, sounding like she was trying to rein in her anger. She did not wait for him to respond before turning and heading back towards the door.

This couldn’t be good, he thought. And he could take a good guess at what she was pissed off about; Kari. Jotting down the answer to his current physics problem, he hit pause on his music player, removed the other earbud and got out of his chair. Leaving his room, Tai walked down the hall into the main living area. He sat down at the table; his parents both already seated. His sister was not present. Knowing full well that he was going to regret it, he felt compelled to ask, “where’s Kari?”

His father gave him a look and a slight shake of the head that hammered home the fact that this was a subject he should not have brought up.

However, his mother’s lips thinned before she spat, “in her bedroom. She doesn’t wish to eat with the rest of the family.”

It was not so much conversation that happened from that point on, rather his mom spending the entirety of dinner ranting at both of them about Kari. Neither man managed to get a word in edgewise. When eventually his own name was dragged through the mud, because of Kari’s hairdo, Tai made the decision that he needed to pick up the pace and escape back to his bedroom before his mom decided to rein unholy furry down upon him. While normally he would willingly take the heat for his sister, today he had neither the time nor the mental capacity to do so. A quick glance at his father told him that he’d had a similar thought, for he too had picked up the pace. However, his father seemed to have forgotten that he would be stuck listening to his wife until such time as she decided to drop the subject. Which did not seem like it would happen any time soon. Tai, on the other hand, had the luxury of escaping to his room.

Clearing his plate, he sat down his chopsticks and waited for his mom to pause for breath. “Do you mind if I go back to my studies now?” he asked, again knowing that it would get him out of the firing line.

“Go right ahead, Son,” his father said with a slight hint of longing. And Tai suspected he fully regretted coming home from the office.

Wasting no time, Tai stood up and hastily vacated the blast zone. If Kari was not careful, she would soon make their mother go nuclear and he had no wish to be anywhere near the apartment if that should happen. However, it was not as if he could tell her to lighten up or get a grip. His sister was seriously hurting, but could not talk to anyone about it save for the person responsible; him. Halfway down the hall, his foot froze mid-step when he heard the sound of a door opening on his left. Turning his head, he found himself face to face with a blotchy eyed Kari.

##

Kari stared at the frozen figure of her brother, just as surprised to have found him upon opening her door as he seemed to be at seeing her. Tears threatened to burst from her eyes once more and she felt an overwhelming torrent of contrasting emotions. From your basic happy and sad all the way up to anguish and ecstasy. Completely overcome, she threw herself across the threshold, seized him around the waist and buried her head into his chest. The tears came the second she felt his strong arms wrap themselves around her shoulders.

Tai did not know how to respond when his sister practically lunged herself at him. Catching him off guard, he staggered slightly when she barrelled into him and he had to quickly shift his stance to avoid crashing to the floor. Instinctively, he placed his arms around his sister’s shoulders and began to gently rub her in a soothing manner. He soon felt a damp patch form on his t-shirt and he knew immediately that she had started to cry again. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw that their mother was watching intently. Meaning that he could not say or do anything out with the acceptable sibling boundaries. Doing the only thing he could think of, he shepherded Kari back into her bedroom and closed the door behind him. However, he decided that he would have to err on the side of caution. He would not put it past his mom to decide to eavesdrop.

Kari allowed herself to be guided back into the confines of her bedroom. Slowly she felt some measure of calm restored to her world as Tai led her over to the bed and sat her down. He sat beside her but kept an arm around her shoulder. What on earth was she going to say to him? For she had certainly blown any facade of fake happy well and truly out the window. Not only that, but her mother had no doubt taken notice of what had just happened in the hall. So any mention of their relationship or feelings for each other was completely out of the question.

“Are you ok, Kari?” Tai eventually asked. He had no idea what else to say at present. He could hazard a fair guess at what was bothering her, only he dare not mention it.

“I’ll be fine,” Kari lied. “I just had a bad day today and finding those CD’s on my desk, followed by seeing you there in the hall caused a bit of an emotional overload.” She looked her brother directly in those warm chocolate brown eyes and gave him a weak smile.

Tai returned his sister’s smile with one of his own. He knew she was lying but could not call her out on it without delving into taboo territory. He would have to find time to talk to her properly when their parents were not at home. For now, he simply replied, “are you sure?”

The look in her brother’s eyes told Kari that he had not bought her lie. And she knew that his words did not convey what he actually thought. Mealy acted as a placeholder for the conversation they could not have. So she dutifully answered, “I’m sure,” and gave his hand a light squeeze. The only plus side to the whole charade was that he did not seem to have overheard her yell at their mother about having almost committed suicide. Thank heavens for small mercies.

Tai felt absolutely torn as he gazed upon the tear-stained face of his beautiful sister. The thought that he was the root cause of this much pain felt almost unbearable. Only he had no idea how he could possibly help her, given that the cold, hard facts of the matter had not changed. Deep inside he could feel the fear start to build at the idea that, in order to have a long-term relationship with his sister, they would have to share their secret with those around them, including their parents. Eventually, he said the only thing he could, “if you need me, don’t hesitate to come find me.”

Kari nodded her head as she said, “I will.” She had no intention of doing so, for Tai had to study for his university entrance test and the last thing he needed right now was to deal with her and the emotional train wreck she had become. However, she did have one question that he might be able to answer. “Why did you buy me those CD’s?”

“I thought you could use something to try and help cheer you up,” Tai replied. While true, he could not say that it was also because he wanted her to know that he still thought about her. Granted, he still did not know whether or not he should. While they were both still hurting, albeit Kari more so at present, it did not change the fact that recommencing their relationship might only lead them to even greater pain further down the line.

While Kari wanted nothing more than to sit here with her brother until long after their parents had gone to bed and knew that he would if she asked, Tai had to get back to his studies. So she simply said, “thank you,” and gave him a nod of her head. However, the thought quickly struck her, “I don’t have anything for you.”

Tai lifted his sister’s chin with a finger and gazed into those brilliant reddish-brown orbs; so full of sorrow. “That’s ok. So long as they help you feel better, I’ll be happy.”

Kari found herself staring into her brother’s brilliant chocolate brown eyes and like when she saw him earlier, was overcome with a Molotov cocktail of emotions. And she again lost control. Reaching forward she kissed Tai full on the lips. If the CD’s had been a way for her brother to let her know that he still thought about her, this was hers.

Caught completely by surprise, Tai neither had the opportunity to resist nor to return the kiss. And while he got the message crystal clear, it elicited two contrasting emotions within him. On one hand, he felt overjoyed that Kari too thought they had made a mistake, while the other could be summed up simply as oh shit! It was the latter that gave rise to his next series of thoughts. This was bad, very bad. What on earth should he do? Nothing had changed since their breakup and never would. Could he possibly be prepared to drag his sister through that gauntlet? He sighed internally. He could not answer such questions at present.

Kari broke off the kiss and could see the conflict written all over her brother’s face. Now she’d gone and done it. While she had needed to convey how she felt to him, the last thing she had wanted was to give him something that would torment him. Maybe this was exactly why they shouldn’t be together. Tai had just given her a wonderful present and in return, she had given him an emotional crisis. Turning away, for she could not bear to look at him anymore, Kari mumbled, “I think you should go.”

Tai did not know what to say. His intention when giving his sister those CD’s had been to try and make her feel a little better. Now it seemed he had managed to do the exact opposite. Perhaps a perfect example of why a relationship between them was a bad idea. Even with the best of intentions, he had only managed to cause Kari more pain. “I think you’re right,” he said and he got to his feet. Walking to the door he took one last agonising glance back at the sister he wanted more than anything but knew he must not have. “I hope you enjoy the CD’s,” he said as he opened the bedroom door.

Kari raised her head and looked at her brother. The person she wanted more than anyone else, but the one that, for his sake, she could not have. “I’ll try,” she sniffed, struggling to hold back her tears.

Tai left without another word. And both siblings knew that the conversation they desperately wanted to have, could never take place. For they were bad for one another.


	52. Pt4 06) Perfect sense - part one

**Part Four: A Secret Discovered**

**Chapter Six: Perfect sense – part one**

The door to Kari’s bedroom clicked shut and it felt to Tai like a metaphorical one had just closed on part of his life... a part that felt agonising to give up, but one he knew he had to. If his sister was in a bad place now, it would be nothing compared to how far she might fall should he selfishly try to purse their relationship and it go south. He let out a longing sigh. It was better this way. While he could not bring himself to regret what they had done, for it had been something magical, they had chosen to end it. And it would be better for Kari if it stayed that way. Crossing the short distance to his own room, he gripped the handle and turned it. Perhaps his mother was right. Maybe he was nothing but a bad influence on his sister. He opened the door and stepped inside. Only for his eyes to widen and mouth to fall open.

“Have a seat, Tai.”

His mom sat on his bed, her gaze locked upon him. How long had she been sitting here? Had she actually been eavesdropping at Kari’s door? Mind racing he quickly tried to think of anything said between himself and his sister that might have hinted at their relationship. He found nothing. Not even the brief kiss they had shared could have made enough noise to be discernible from outside the bedroom. So what did she want? Crossing the threshold, Tai slowly closed the door, his eyes fixed on his mom and the spot on the bed beside her, which she indicated with her hand.

“Hi, Mom,” he replied with slight awkwardness as he sat down. This felt weird. Heart to heart conversations were not something they did.

Tai studied his mother’s expression. Gone was the pre-nuclear anger that had smeared it throughout dinner and in its place a mix of worry and… fear. Save for the Digimon incidents, he could only recall one instance of seeing his mother look afraid; the time when he had almost killed Kari.

An uncomfortable silence hung in the air between them for a moment before his mom spoke. It seemed that she too found this situation... uncomfortable. “Tai,” she began before pausing, the difficulty of her next words clearly apparent, “Tai… I owe you an apology.”

A stunned expression covered his face as he listened. Whatever he had expected her to say, that had not been it. What on earth could his mother, of all people, have to apologise for? For it was not exactly in her nature to do so. At least not when it came to him. While they had a perfectly cordial and somewhat happy relationship, most of the time, there were occasional moments where he could feel a sort of distance between them. His mind thought back to the last time. It had been in the wake of Kari getting her hair dyed and lasted over a week. However, it was Kari’s suggestion that his mom had never managed to completely forgive him for the time he had almost killed her that stuck in his mind.

After a few moments and not really sure what to say, he replied, “what for?”

His mom looked awkward and again, with difficulty, answered, “for how I acted when I saw what Kari had done to her hair.”

This proved to be another shock to the system. “Mom, that happened two months ago,” Tai said in confusion. “Why are you apologising for it now?” It certainly was belated.

“Because you were right and I was wrong,” she almost yelled, her calm demeanour slipping for a moment. That must have been a difficult admission. His mom took a steadying breath. “Sorry, Tai. It’s not your fault.” She looked away before adding, “it’s not easy for a mother to admit that someone else knows their daughter better than they do.”

The silence that followed her words was so deafening that you could have heard a spider scuttle across the floor. Had his mother just openly admitted that he knew Kari better than she did?

“Mom…” he said softly his gaze fixed upon the corner of her eye that he could see.

“I don’t know what to do, Tai,” the woman’s voice cracked slightly as she spoke. “Every time I try to talk to your sister, I feel like she slips even further away from me. She kept saying she was fine and even though I knew something was wrong, nothing I said could get her to open up to me. Then tonight, I got so angry with myself for being unable to reach her, that I lashed out at her.”

Tai had absolutely no idea what to say. Here was his mother, a strong woman who became this formidable force when incensed, confiding her fears and worries about her daughter in him. They were in completely uncharted territory now. Tentatively he reached out a hand and touched her own. From his recent experiences with Kari and Sora, he knew that physical contact often helped to calm a person… or make them breakdown into floods of tears. He could only hope his mother did not go that route. “She’s just going through a rough patch at the moment,” he eventually said, feeling a slight pang of guilt for telling a heavily abridged version of the truth. “She’ll get through it eventually.” He struggled to put much conviction into those last words.

His mother turned to look at him and he could see the first signs of tears that she was desperately trying to hold back. “Tai, when she came home tonight, she said she’d tried to throw herself in the river. Only for someone to stop her before she fell in.”

Tai’s mouth fell open in horror as his mother’s words hit him like a punch to the gut. Having had his earbuds in, he had missed the argument between mother and daughter before dinner. And Kari had said nothing about it during their brief conversation. Was it true? Had she really tried to commit suicide? If so, the situation had just become far worse than he had imagined.

When he failed to muster any sort of response, his mom then said, “Tai, I need you to talk to me. You know something about what’s wrong with your sister and you have to tell me...” his mother sounded almost desperate as she spoke. Then, in an almost pleading voice that he had never heard her use before, she uttered, “...please.”

Crap, Tai moaned internally. How had he found himself in this impossible position? He could not possibly tell his mother the truth, but here she was, almost begging him to tell her what he knew about Kari’s troubles. He looked into chocolate eyes, the same colour as his but with the shape of Kari’s. It was clear to see just how much this situation pained her. And he found that he could neither lie to her or refuse her an answer. What could he do? He turned away to stare at the opposite wall, his brain working overtime as he tried to come up with a solution.

“Tai, please,” his mother repeated softly. “I know Kari probably told you not to tell anyone, but this is serious. She needs help, Tai.”

She was right, he realised. His sister needed help, but for once he could not be the one to provide it. But his mom would not be able to do it if all she had were whatever lies he could spin. She needed the truth and he was going to give it to her, except for one minor detail. “I don’t know when exactly, but a couple of months ago, she started dating someone,” he began, tweaking the timeline slightly so it lined up with when she got her new hairdo.

“She never told me that she had a boyfriend,” his mom said with a hint of scepticism.

“She didn’t tell me either,” Tai asserted. “In fact, she didn’t tell anyone. I only found out because I saw them together from distance and asked her about it. After she told me, she swore me to secrecy.”

“Why did she keep it a secret? Is he a delinquent?” she asked sharply.

“He’s not a delinquent, though not that it matters anymore. And I think she kept it a secret because she was scared.

His mother looked at him suspiciously. “If he was not a delinquent, why would she be scared to tell me?”

Tai sighed lightly. This was the part of his story that he would need to fabricate based on his sister’s history. “Kari got hurt in the fallout of her breakup with TK. Then made a huge mistake in going out with Davis so soon afterwards.” He paused to allow his words to sink in. All this was true, meaning he only needed to make a plausible extrapolation from these events. “The whole affair left her feeling burned and I think she’s been really scared of opening up to anyone since. Hence why she’s not had a boyfriend since she broke up with Davis.”

“Until now.”

“Yeah… until now. I don’t know the details, so please don’t ask me for them. Kari didn’t want to talk about him beyond confirming that she had been seeing him. Hell, she wouldn’t even tell me his name.”

His mom looked quizzically at him but said nothing.

“I think she was trying to keep it casual, which included not telling people about it because she was scared about it becoming serious in case she got hurt again.” As he spoke, Tai started to become increasingly impressed at how much of the truth could be given a slight twist in order for it to fit the idea that Kari’s boyfriend had been someone other than him. “Unfortunately, it quickly did…”

“How serious?” his mother asked with a slight edge and he knew exactly what she was implying.

“She didn’t sleep with him,” Tai replied firmly, images from the intimate moments he and his sister had shared floating through his mind. He brushed them aside for now. At some point, he knew he would turn to them for some small comfort, even if they would remind him of exactly what he had given up. “However, she was in love with him. And I don’t mean your average teenage romance love either.” He had to turn back and face the wall to avoid her seeing the sadness that he desperately tried to keep from his own eyes. “When I eventually got the truth out of her, she told me that she had fallen for him two years ago. And that actually being with him had only deepened her feelings.” This last part he felt it necessary to tell, otherwise his mom might raise an eyebrow at how Kari could have fallen so deeply in love with someone in just over two months.

“What happened?” his mother asked, still with the edge to her tone. However, Tai knew that it was now the sort you would associate with a mother wolf trying to protect her cub.

“They had to end it and it broke Kari’s heart. His too if she was being honest with me.” Saying it out loud to someone, even if they were oblivious to the whole truth, hurt Tai deep inside and he struggled to maintain his composure. He took a few slow breaths in order to steady himself. If he broke down when talking about his sister’s relationship breakup, it would arouse far too much suspicion.

Tai chanced a glance at his mother and he could see the mixture of shock and hurt on her face. Shock, at the fact something so big had occurred in her daughter’s life without her knowledge. And hurt, because she could empathise with Kari’s pain as though it were her own. However, there was something else… a sense of failure. She thought she had failed as a mother. He could not help but feel guilty. His mother had become the collateral damage of his incestuous relationship with his sister. The thought of how she might feel if she knew the whole truth chilled him to the bone. Just another reason why ending things between himself and Kari had been the right thing to do.

A few moments passed in a chilly silence before his mother composed herself enough to say, “why did they break up?”

“I don’t know,” Tai said flatly. Electing to leave the details up to his sister; it would make things easier for her if she had less to remember. “Kari didn’t want to talk about it. In fact, I’m lucky she even told me this much.”

His mom raised a hand to shield her eyes, shook her head and sighed. “Thank you, Tai,” she said softly, her voice carrying an undertone that told him that her battle had only just begun. Then, much to his surprise, she reached out and gave him a hug. “You’re doing so well, Son, and no matter what the outcome of your admissions test, I’m proud of you.”

“Thanks, Mom,” he replied as she let go and stood up. His mother took a few steps towards the door and just as she was about to reach for the handle, a thought struck him like a jolt from the mains socket. “Mom,” he said quickly.

The woman’s hand froze and she turned back to look at him. “Yes, Tai?”

“Can you maybe wait a little while before you go talk to Kari? I think she could really use a little bit of space and time to calm down just now.” In normal circumstances, he would expect his request to be ignored. However, given his mother’s earlier admission, he hoped she would agree. Otherwise, he would be unable to warn his sister that their mother was coming and that he’d had to semi-fabricate a story to explain her current state of unhappiness.

A few seconds of agonising silence passed and he could see his mom internally wrestling with the suggestion. Eventually, just as a few beads of sweat had begun to form on the back of his neck, she replied, “ok, I’ll give her an hour. Hopefully, I can get her to talk to me this time.”

Tai nodded his thanks and watched her go. When the door closed behind her, he let out a breath he had not realised he’d been holding. He too hoped that Kari would talk to her. His sister needed someone to be there for her and this time it could not be him. Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out his cell phone and started composing a message to his sister.

_“Ok, so mom just interrogated me about what’s wrong with you and I had to tell her something. I’m really, really sorry, but I had no choice. She knows something serious is bothering you and it’s cutting her up inside that you won’t talk to her. I told her that you had been dating someone that you’d fallen for two years ago and that it broke your heart when you had to break up with him. I gave her no details other than that. She’s going to come talk to you in an hour. I’m really sorry, Sis.”_

He hit the send button and crossed his fingers that Kari would check her phone. Rising from the bed, Tai walked over to his desk and looked down at the physics textbook that sat open on the wooden surface. There was no way he would be able to get back into the mindset required to study tonight. Shaking his head, he gently closed the textbook and his notepad. He would need to try and make up the time at the weekend. Picking up his earbuds, he popped them into his ears and flicked through the albums on his music player until he found Space Ritual. He seriously needed something to take his mind off-world and Hawkwind would do just that. Returning to his bed, he lay down and stared up at the ceiling as the album kicked into gear.

After almost fifty minutes and with no reply from his sister, Tai was starting to get worried. Surely Kari would have sent a reply, even if she was seriously pissed off with him. If she had not seen his message, it could cause her serious problems when their mom went to talk to her. Either that or the woman would think he had lied to her and give him a rollicking. Pulling out his phone, he sent her another message. _“Ok, I know you’re probably mad at me, but please let me know if you got my last message.”_

No reply. The minutes ticked away and Tai quickly reasoned he only had two options; phone Kari and hope she answered or physically go to her room. The latter would be a bad idea. If their mom caught him doing so, she might immediately become suspicious about whether or not he had told her the truth. No, there was only one possible solution. Scrolling to Kari’s name on his phone, he hit dial and waited with bated breath. It rang out; shit. Feeling a slight panic set in, he hurriedly tried again. Come on, Kari, he whispered to himself as he listened to the ringer.

Barely seconds before her voicemail kicked in, he heard his sister’s voice say, “Tai?”

“Kari,” he breathed in relief, before quickly dispensing with the pleasantries, “Kari, did you get the text I sent you about an hour ago?” He kept his voice low so as to try and prevent it from travelling out with the walls of his bedroom.

“No,” she replied, sounding slightly confused. “Tai, what’s…”

He cut her off, “I don’t have time to explain and I don’t want to say it over the phone, just in case Mom overhears. You need to read that message now before she comes to talk to you. If you have any questions, text me.”

“Ok…” Kari said, her confusion having kicked up a few notches. “Tai, what’s going on?”

“Kari, I’m really sorry, but I didn’t have a choice. Just read the message, “ he said sombrely, knowing that his sister might well soon hate him. “I going to hang up now, just know that I’m sorry.”

Tai hung up the phone, feeling like he had just hammered the final nail into the coffin that contained their forbidden relationship. Popping his earbuds back into his ears, he hit play on his music player. Wanting nothing more than to forget the entire evening had ever happened. 


	53. Pt4 07) Perfect sense - part two

**Part Four: A Secret Discovered**

**Chapter Seven: Perfect sense – part two**

Kari sat on her bed with her back resting against her propped up pillow. She would have rather huddled herself on the floor, where she belonged, but knew it would only make life harder for herself when her mother eventually came for the inevitable talk. After Tai had left, she’d cried some more and felt the same level of pain that had led her to the edge of the river earlier that evening. However, she had resisted the urge to go out onto the balcony. At present, she could not trust herself. Instead, she had sought a distraction and it had come in the form of the new CD’s her brother had just bought for her. One at a time she had ripped them to her laptop and copied them over to her music player.

The Mike Oldfield album, Guitars, had been the first on her playlist. While not as good as his other albums, she had still found quite a lot to enjoy about it. She had moved onto Pink Floyds The Division Bell next. Slowly, Kari opened her eyes and let out a short breath. An instrumental track had just given her a momentary reprieve from the world and it had been bliss. From inside the pocket of her plain blue jeans, she felt her phone begin to vibrate. She ignored it as the haunting notes of the next track began and it rang out. A few moments later and it started again. Sighing in irritation, she reached into her pocket and pulled it out. She had no intention of answering it, however, she fully intended to put the device on silent so it could disturb her no more. Flipping her phone open, her reddish-brown eyes widened when she saw the identity of the caller; Tai. Why on earth would her brother be phoning her from across the hallway? Hastily, Kari tore off her headphones and hit the answer button.

“Tai?” she said in confusion as she brought the device up to her ear.

“Kari,” her brother replied, sounding relieved that she had answered. “Kari, did you get the text I sent you about an hour ago?”

“No,” she replied. She briefly took the phone away from her ear, glanced at the screen and saw the icon that indicated she had an unread message. “Tai, what’s…”

Her brother swiftly cut her off, “I don’t have time to explain and I don’t want to say it over the phone, just in case Mom overhears. You need to read that message now before she comes to talk to you. If you have any questions, text me.”

“Ok…” Kari began, now even more confused. What on earth could be that important and secretive that he could not say aloud? “Tai, what’s going on?”

“Kari, I’m really sorry, but I didn’t have a choice. Just read the message.” A feeling of dread began to wash over her as she listened to her brother’s words. What had he done? She had no time to reply before he said, “I going to hang up now, just know that I’m sorry.”

“Tai, wait,” Kari said quickly, but the line had gone dead. Damn it. What the hell was going on?

With little choice, other than getting up and going through to see her brother, she opened her messages and saw two from him. The top one read, _“ok, I know you’re probably mad at me, but please let me know if you got my last message.” _Other than raising the question, what would she be mad for, it was of little help. She closed it quickly and opened the next one down.

_“Ok, so mom just interrogated me about what’s wrong with you and I had to tell her something. I’m really sorry, but I had no choice. She knows something serious is bothering you and it’s cutting her up inside that you won’t talk to her. I told her that you had been dating someone that you’d fallen for two years ago and that it broke your heart when you had to break up with him. I gave her no details other than that. She’s going to come talk to you in an hour. I’m really sorry, Sis.”_

Kari’s eyes widened as she read her brother’s message and she felt a cocktail of anger and rage begin to steadily grow inside her with each passing word. He had told their mother. How dare he! Granted he had obviously not revealed the identity of her boyfriend. The fact the apartment building still stood was testament to that. However, it sounded very much like he had told the woman exactly what was bothering her. Never before could she recall feeling so much anger towards Tai. By what right did he think he could tell their mother about her personal feelings? The inevitable conversation with her mom would have been difficult enough. Now it had just become exponentially more so. Betrayed did not quite sum up how she felt at this moment.

Virtually seething, Kari looked at the time Tai had sent the message and then the clock at the top of the screen. Bastard! Her mom would be knocking at her door any minute now. Her mind quickly tried to give her some options. However, it quickly became apparent that she only had two. Either she let her mom in and got the conversation over with, or she refused and simply delayed it until tomorrow, or the next day. Regardless, sooner or later, her mom would corner her and force the discussion upon her.

A few moments later, she heard the inevitable knock on her door; far gentler than she would have expected. “Kari,” her mom said softly from the other side, “can I come in?”

The mild-mannered way in which her mother had made the request threw Kari. Given their argument earlier, she had expected her door to have been blown off its hinges. Instead, she could detect a hint of sorrow in her mother’s voice. She sighed, slid off her bed and moved towards the door. Rolling her eyes, she took a deep breath and opened it.

Her mother stood in the doorway and Kari could immediately see the concern and worry on her face. It seemed that Tai had been right about the situation cutting her up inside. Somehow that made the whole situation worse. A heated screaming match she could have dealt with. However, that seemed to be the furthest thing from her mother’s mind at present. Her earlier anger seemingly having evaporated. Damn Tai. Kari moved away from the door to allow her mom to cross the threshold.

“Can I sit down?”

Everything from her mother’s movements to her tone and the content of her words suggested she wished to avoid a confrontation at all costs. And Kari got the feeling that she was being treated like an injured dog that would be liable to bite your hand off if you made the wrong move. She nodded in response and closed the door as her mother took up a position on the bed.

“Come sit with me,” her mom said softly and patted the spot beside her.

Cautiously, Kari did as she was bid and sat down. She looked upon her mother’s face. A face that resembled an older version of her own, except for the eye colour, which was more of a match with Tai’s. A glimpse at her own future perhaps, if she should be so lucky. For a woman just over forty, she had the youthful appearance of someone ten years her junior. Kari opened her mouth to say something, what exactly she had not figured out, but was saved the embarrassment of having to close it again.

“Kari, I’m sorry for yelling at you earlier,” her mother began, sounding completely sincere. “It’s just… you’ve been so closed off lately and I’ve failed to reach you… I suppose I was just as angry with myself as I was with you.”

The sadness in her mom’s voice cut Kari right to her core. Until tonight, she had believed that she had managed to maintain a decent façade of fake happy. Much like she had done for a full year after her breakup with TK. However, it was quickly becoming apparent that her sorrow surrounding the end of her relationship with Tai had been too great to contain. Her mom had clearly noticed and it seemed that her actions had hurt the woman deeply. And that made the whole situation worse. She had never wanted nor intended to hurt anyone. Alas, it appeared that she had done just that.

Kari could not hold her mother’s gaze and instead looked down at her feet when she said, “I’m sorry, Mom.”

She could feel a fresh set of tears starting to form and had to fight in order to stop them from pouring forth. Ever since the breakup, it seemed like all she did was cry. Kari felt an arm wrap itself around her shoulder and soon found herself pulled into a hug. While not the same as being within Tai’s strong embrace, she felt a certain childlike security within her mother’s. Yet she could not wash away the small part of her that felt guilty. A guilt normally associated with having broken someone’s trust. For that was what she now felt she had done in having illicit relations with her brother.

“It’s going to be alright,” her mom soothed and Kari could sense that the woman felt surer of herself as a mother than she had done five minutes ago. “I spoke with your brother earlier, but I suspect he’s already told you that.”

Kari pulled back slightly and looked at her mom with slight amazement. How did she know?

The woman let out a light laugh. “You seriously think I don’t know my own children? You and you’re brother have always had a close relationship. Closer than most siblings I suspect.” She gave Kari a smile. “And you both always tried to warn each other when I was on the warpath.”

If only you knew the truth, Mother, Kari thought. You would not be smiling then. If you knew what your children had done together, you would once more find yourself on the warpath.

Her mother then gave her a kind but serious look. “I think you should tell me everything.”

Perhaps it was her own paranoia, but for a moment, Kari wondered if Tai had accidentally let something slip, or if their mother really did know her own children. For she had trouble shaking the feeling that her mom knew more than she was letting on. A brief thought to confessing her sins, brought on by the slight pang guilt, floated through her mind. She quickly rejected it. This could simply be her mom’s way of giving her enough rope with which to hang both herself and Tai. And while she felt unfamiliar feelings of hate towards her brother at present, she had no desire to see him crucified. Even though, as per usual, she would probably get off lighter. No, she would do as he had and tell an altered version of the truth. Her mother relinquished her hold on her as she motioned to sit up straight.

“It all started a few years ago,” she began, calling to mind a real event that would serve as a good starting point from which to spin her lie. “Some of the older boys had taken to harassing the girls in my year. It had started out as just an irritation, so most of the girls ignored them. However, their actions slowly started to escalate.”

Her mother frowned at her, apparently unhappy that this was the first she had heard of this, but allowed her to continue.

“They’d left me alone, however, when they started picking on my friends, I got angry and yelled at them. It was enough to draw their attention and they cornered me after school that day. I don’t know what they planned to do, but they were stopped by one of the other boys in their year.” Kari paused for a moment. Everything so far was true. The lie would come in the form of the identity of her saviour. Instead of her brother’s name, she said, “his name was Takato.”

Her mother arched her eyebrows and pursed her lips slightly. Clearly, she’d figured out where this was headed and Kari knew she would not approve of her having dated an older boy. However, given that the relationship had ended, she would probably be spared the full disapproval act.

“I was so infatuated that I couldn’t stop thinking about him. And we sort of became friends a few weeks later after I saved him from detention.”

“How did you manage that?” her mother asked curiously. She must have been desperate to hear the whole story as her voice contained none of the disapproval that had shown on her face moments earlier.

“We bumped into each other outside school one morning. I was running late because I’d tripped and hurt my leg,” Kari replied, her mind quickly recalling an incident that had occurred between herself and Davis. “Before the vice-principle caught us, I gave Takato my bag, then explained that he had picked me up after my fall and helped me limp to school, that was why he was late.”

She paused to allow this story to sink in and give her mother the chance to scrutinise it. Only the woman elected not to. Instead, she asked, “did the two of you spend much time together?”

“Not at first,” Kari answered, sensing a hint of disbelief in her mother’s tone. To be fair, it was understandable. She had already stated that Takato was a few years older than her and at that age (she would have been thirteen) it generally made a difference when it came to who you were friends with. However, she had already come up with a plausible answer. “It was several months before we hung out with any sort of frequency. We both grew comfortable around each other because we had no expectation of the other. That and all the girls in his year flirted with him constantly. I think my company must have been refreshing for him.”

“I thought you said you were infatuated with him?” her mother probed, still sounding slightly sceptical.

“I was, but I never let it show.” She forced herself to give a small smile. “You know me, I’m not the flirting sort.”

Her mother nodded in agreement. It was advice she had given to her during **the** talk. If a boy doesn’t take notice of you because of who you are, then he’s not worth it. “So what happened between the two of you?”

Kari deliberately turned back to look at the floor and feigned a look of sorrow. “Just over two years ago, Takato got a girlfriend.” She was now into the territory of a full-blown lie. Unfortunately, Tai had screwed her over on this one and so she needed to come up with something that would explain her relationship with TK. Damn Tai. “He was so excited about it that I had no choice but to appear happy for him. However, deep inside I felt so jealous that I think that’s when I realised my feelings were more than just infatuation.”

“So how does TK fit into this,” her mother probed. “You seemed pretty happy when you were with him.”

The question arrived right on cue and she already had the answer prepared. This was where she could return to the truth. “TK asked me out a few weeks after Takato started dating Rika.” She threw in a name for her fake boyfriend’s fake girlfriend just to add a little substance to the story. “I said yes to try and take my mind off of Takato and for a long time, it seemed to work. In the first six months or so we had a lot of fun.”

“What happened?” her mother’s tone had shifted more to one of concern. Kari had never divulged the full details of what happened between herself and TK to her.

“Things between us started to get more serious. And I soon realised that, although TK loved me, I was not in love with him. Every time he kissed me, I kept wondering what it would be like if it was Takato kissing me instead…” she trailed off at the memory of kissing the blonde boy while thinking about Tai. Maybe it would have been better if the taste and feel of her brother’s kiss had been left to her imagination.

Her mom, clearly having picked up on her sorrow, placed a hand around her shoulder once more. “Is that why you broke up with him?”

“He tried to give me a promise ring on our one-year anniversary date.” While she had made peace with what she had done that night, due to her heightened emotional state, a few tears slid down her cheek. “I broke his heart that night when I ended things.”

“Oh, Kari,” her mom said softly as she pulled her into another hug. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I felt so guilty for having not done it sooner… and TK didn’t make it easy for me…”

They sat in relative silence for a few minutes while her mom soothed her. Unfortunately, Kari knew that there was far worse to come. And she shuddered to think about the state she would be in when it came time to talk about her breakup with Tai/Takato. When eventually her tears subsided and she had regained her composure, she continued with her story. “After I broke up with him, TK and I had several fights in quick succession. And I soon became angry with him for not leaving me alone. So angry that I started going out with Davis as a sort of fuck you.”

“Kari, watch your language,” her mom instinctively reprimanded; she was not one for expletives.

“Sorry,” she replied quickly. “Anyway, that relationship, though fun for a few weeks, didn’t last long. I knew then that I was in love with Takato, one-hundred per cent. However, not only was he not available, the whole experience with TK and Davis had left me feeling scared to get involved with someone else.”

“But you eventually did,” her mother encouraged, in a tone that suggested she was worried that Kari would close herself off again.

“Takato broke up with Rika a few months ago.” She was back in lie territory but knew she could easily twist it into the truth. “He was quite upset when he told me, so I took him into town for the day to try and help him forget…” she trailed off again, this time recalling the fateful day on which she kissed Tai for the first time.

Her mom gave her a light squeeze and rubbed her right shoulder for encouragement. “Just take your time, Kari. Don’t try to force it out.”

She took a deep breath and forced thoughts of Tai from her mind. She needed to stay focused, otherwise, she ran the risk of slipping up. Something that could prove disastrous, should her brother’s name accidentally pass her lips instead of Takato’s. “Takato cheered up a lot over the course of the day and so we went back to his place. We started to joke and mess around and eventually ended up wrestling on the floor…” the moment between herself and Tai flashed through her mind again, “…and I accidentally kissed him.”

Her mother let out a sigh, though it was not of scorn or derision, rather one that suggested she understood exactly what must have been going through Kari’s head at the time. “What did you do?” she then asked

“I was so embarrassed and scared that I quickly left and ran all the way home. Takato must have called me a hundred times that night, but I couldn’t answer him.” She had to pause for a moment to figure out exactly how she would have reacted in a situation where the individual in question could not jump a balcony so as to get into her bedroom. “I ignored all his calls and messages for the next few days, however, he was persistent and turned up when I finished school one evening. He eventually got me to talk to him and I told him how I felt. It turned out that he liked me too. But given that we’d both been burned in our previous relationships, we decided not to rush into anything. I guess you could say we sort of danced around the fringes of making it an actual thing for a week or two.”

“That was a very sensible thing to do,” her mom said with a smile that indicated she felt a small sense of pride in the way her daughter had conducted herself. “Most young people have a habit of rushing into things that they’re not ready for.”

“Eventually, Takato realised that he didn’t just like me, that he was in love with me.” The moment where her brother had professed his love for her filled Kari’s mind and she could do nothing to stop fresh tears from pouring forth. “I can’t put into words how happy I felt that day, or on any of the subsequent days.”

Her mother gently started to soothe her again and waited until her tears had subsided before throwing her a curveball, “was this Takato the reason for your recent wardrobe choices and,” she picked up a few strands of Kari’s lit match hair, “this?”

She let out a small chuckle. “Sorry, Mom, but that’s all on me. Takato had nothing to do with it. In fact, he found the idea that I wanted to get a tattoo abhorrent. Apparently, I have really nice skin and it would be a crime to brand it.”

“I should think so too,” her mother replied firmly. “At least this boy seems to have some common sense.”

“It doesn’t matter what he has now,” Kari whispered dejectedly.

An awkward silence hung in the air, her mother perhaps realising that what she had said lacked tact. “I’m sorry, Kari,” she then said and held her tightly. After a few moments, she then asked, “why did it end?”

Hot tears started to pour forth with reckless abandon as for the second time that day, she was forced to relive the painful memory of her breakup with Tai. At this point, it was almost impossible for Kari to concoct a lie to take the place of the bitter truth, but somehow she managed it. “Just over a month ago, Takato’s father got confirmation of his transfer from his companies Tokyo office to their one in the USA. The whole family is moving out there, including Takato… it broke both our hearts the night he told me and we realised we had to end things…” Kari dissolved into a complete bubbling wreck. Her words may have been a lie, but the feelings were genuine.

“Oh, Kari. I’m so sorry,” her mom said as she held her daughters sobbing head against her chest. “I really am. A broken heart is one of the worst things a person can experience, especially if they were genuinely in love. But you can heal. You can learn to move on.”

“How?” Kari wailed. “How do I move on when I know that the person whom I’m in love with still wants to be with me, but we can’t?”

“Well,” an awkward pause followed her mom’s opening remark and Kari knew that she was struggling to think of something helpful. To her knowledge, her mother had never suffered heartbreak. So how could she possibly offer her any helpful advice? “I think the most important thing is that you’ve started to talk about it. Keeping your feelings bottled up inside is never healthy and only makes things worse.” There was another pause before her mother said, very carefully, “why don’t you tell me about what happened down by the river this evening.”

Kari gulped at the reminder of the fact that she had yelled at her mother about her attempt to throw herself into the river earlier that day. In the course of telling her semi-truthful story, she had forgotten all about it. Slowly, she said, “that was the last place I saw him… the place where we broke up.” She let out a sigh. She knew what question would be coming next and it was time for an outright lie.

The genuine look of sympathy she received from her mother did little to soothe her. However, when her mom then asked, in a shaky voice, “did you try to throw yourself in the river?” Kari deliberately turned her gaze to the floor.

“No,” she said as calmly as she could. “I’m sorry, Mom. I was angry earlier and wanted to say something that would hurt you.”

She sneaked a sideways glance at her mother’s expression and saw, slightly to her surprise, a look of relief. Nevertheless, the woman asked, “are you sure?”

“Yes. I did go down to the river, but I didn’t try to throw myself in.”

“Ok,” her mom breathed, her tone now matching her expression. “On balance I’d rather it be that than the alternative.”

Kari lifted her head and turned to look at the woman again. “I’m really sorry if I hurt you, Mom. I think something just snapped inside me earlier.”

Her mother pulled her into another hug. “It’s ok, Kari. We all say and do things that we don’t really mean sometimes, especially when we’re hurting like you are. The important thing is that you’re safe and that you’ve started to talk about it. However, you need to keep talking about how you’re feeling. If you shut yourself away from the world, the pain will only get worse. Do you understand?”

“I understand,” Kari answered. At this point, she wanted nothing more than for the conversation to end.

Her mom gave her shoulder a reassuring rub. “If you need to talk at any point, about anything, I’ll always be here.”

“I know.”

With one final squeeze, her mother released Kari from the hug and stood up. “When you’re feeling a bit better, I’m going to take you shopping.” The woman let out a small sigh, before adding, “even if it means going to h.NAOTO.”

A faint, half-smile formed on Kari’s lips. While she had reverted back to wearing what remained of her old wardrobe, she could not hide the slight feeling of satisfaction that came from hearing her mother’s semi-acceptance of her alternate style. “Ok,” she replied. Although she still could not envisage a time when she would feel any better.

“Would you like something to eat?” her mom then asked when she reached the door.

“No thank you. I think I’m going to go to bed.”

“If you’re sure.” Her mother opened the door and stepped out into the hallway. “Goodnight, Kari,” she said as she closed it behind her.

Kari let out a very long, deep breath. That had been difficult. Damn Tai for throwing her under the bus like that. Shakily she stood up, stripped of her clothes and changed into her pyjamas. Picking up her headphones from where they had been abandoned on the bed surface, she pulled them on and climbed in under the covers. Today had been long and agonising and now she just wanted it to be over. She would deal with how she’d wound up at the river’s edge later. For now, she just wanted to listen to some music and try to slip into unconsciousness. Selecting The Division Bell on her music player, she lay back, closed her eyes and waited for the delicate opening piano notes to penetrate the low buzz and hiss that gently led the listener into the album.


	54. Pt4 08) Out of the blue

**Part Four: A Secret Discovered**

**Chapter Eight: Out of the blue**

It was Friday night. Though not that it made much difference to Tai Kamiya. For every night was a study night at present. In fact, this weekend he even had the arduous task of catching up on all the work he should have done yesterday. Made worse by the fact that he hadn’t felt this low since the immediate aftermath of his breakup with Kari. After he had spoken to his sister over the phone the previous night, he’d had no contact whatsoever from her. Hell, she wouldn’t even look at him this morning and point-blank ignored him when he had said good morning. Evidently, as expected, she was pissed. For a brief moment last night, his resolve had weakened to the point that he’d almost told her that they’d made a serious mistake. Now he felt like the chances of them ever getting back together were sub-zero. He wanted Kari more than anything, yet she probably hated him now and he fully deserved it.

The scars on Tai’s right wrist had itched more today than they had on any other since the wounds had fully healed. On several occasions, he had caught himself scratching at them. He looked down and saw that he was doing it now. It seemed that tonight was going to be one for the stress ball and Hawkwind. Tossing his pen down in frustration, he packed away his things and left the study room. He’d planned to stay until the teacher shooed them all out, for he had little desire to go home. His parents would already have gone out for the evening and the idea of being home alone with a pissed off Kari did not enthral him. However, the teacher in question was not a fan of students using music players while studying and Tai now desperately needed his.

Making his way outside, Tai trudged towards the bike racks. Even though it had only just gone five pm, the air temperature had dropped considerably. Although there was no wind, he still felt thankful that he’d decided to wear a sweater underneath his blazer today. Unlocking his bike, he rolled it towards the main gate; in no rush to get home.

“Hey, Tai,” a voice called out from behind and he stopped. He recognised it instantly but it immediately raised the question of what its owner was doing here? Turning around his eyes caught sight of the slender figure dressed in a green Odaiba Middle School sailor-suit. Her long lavender hair hung down her back and her large round glasses were perched upon her nose. She wore a thick winter jacket, however, her legs were offered no such protection from the cold. What on earth was Yolei doing here?

“Hey yourself,” Tai replied as the girl strode over to walk beside him. He decided to get straight to the point. “what are you doing here?”

“Well, I’ve not been waiting here since the chime went for the good of my health,” she replied.

He watched as she stowed a book away inside her bag. “Why on earth would you have waited out here for over an hour? It’s freezing.”

“Not quite, but it is bitterly cold.” She gave him a friendly smile. “So I’d appreciate it if you started walking.”

“Huh?” Tai said in confusion. “I’ve got a bike.” He indicated the red-framed bicycle he was pushing.

“Well, unless you intend to let me ride on the back, we need to walk. However, we won’t exactly be able to talk if you do that.”

“Ok...” Tai began, “...you’ve lost me?”

Yolei rolled her eyes. “I’m here to talk to you, Idiot. Only I’d rather do it while we walk as I am very cold and would like to get my blood circulating before it turns to ice.”

“Why do you want to talk to me?” he asked, but started walking nonetheless; he was getting cold too.

“Urgh, I forgot how dense you can be,” the lavender haired girl said in an exasperated manner. “I want to talk to you about Kari. You know, that girl with the lit match hair who is supposed to be your sister.

“Don’t remind me,” Tai automatically said. The thought escaping from his mouth before he had a chance to stop it. He sighed internally. Kari, his current least favourite subject. Of course Yolei was here to talk about her.

The girl immediately leapt upon his remark and asked, “why?”

“Because I did something last night to seriously piss her off,” Tai spat without thinking. “However, that’s none of your concern,” he added in anticipation of the follow-up question.

“Geeze, you’re in a bad mood,” Yolei exclaimed, not sounding at all phased by his slightly aggressive tone. “Have you eaten recently?”

He ignored the joke but did say, “sorry. I’ve been having a rough time of it lately. What is it about Kari you want to talk about?”

“I want to know what’s wrong with her,” Yolei said firmly. “And before you say it, I’ve asked her, but she keeps telling me that everything is fine. However, I know that’s a load of bull. I missed the signs with her last year, but now that I know to look for them I can see that she’s slipping back into depression. She’s barely talking to anyone, has started making excuses not to hang out again and she’s reverted to her old wardrobe on the few instances I’ve seen her out with school.”

So Yolei had noticed Kari’s slide too. Only unlike last year, had not simply put it down to her being a whiny bitch that needed to get her shit together. However, he’d already done enough damage by telling their mother the semi-truth of the matter last night. “I’m sorry, Yolei, but I haven’t noticed anything and Kari certainly hasn’t told me that there’s something wrong.”

The lavender haired girl suddenly shot in front of him so quickly that he had to squeeze the brake on his bike in order to stop it from hitting her. Since when could she move that fast? When he recovered from the momentary shock, Tai found himself facing a piercing stare.

“Bullshit,” Yolei spat with venom. “We all know that you’re like the God of big brothers. If I’ve noticed something’s wrong with your sister, then you definitely have.”

As he listened to her words, Tai knew that nothing he said would dissuade the girl from her belief that he knew something was wrong with Kari. And he was about to open his mouth to say that even if he had noticed, he did not know what the actual problem was, when a voice in the back of his head said softly, _“Kari needs help.” _He sighed internally again. It was true. Whether she wanted it or not, his sister needed help, but for once he could not provide it. If she already hated him for last night, what difference did it make if he enabled someone else to try? At the end of the day, it was his sister’s state of wellbeing that mattered. If that meant his relationship with her got irreparably damaged, then so be it. He would sacrifice anything if it meant she would be ok.

“I can’t tell you what’s wrong with her,” Tai began, his words meeting with a firm scowl. “However, if you come home with me, you’ll probably be able to see first hand just how not ok she is.”

“I already know she’s not ok,” Yolei spat. “It’s what’s wrong with her that I want to know.”

“True, but anytime you’ve spoken to her, Kari has denied it. If you see first hand that she isn’t ok, she can’t deny it anymore and hopefully, she’ll talk to you.”

The lavender haired girl moved away from the front of his bike .“That doesn’t sound like much of a plan, but ok. I’ll come with you.”

Tai nodded his head and the pair set off once more in the direction of the Kamiya residence. They shared no other conversation during the journey. Something that he was quite thankful for. He had nothing against Yolei, rather he did not feel very talkative at present. All he wanted to do was shut himself up in his room, put some Hawkwind on and get on with his studies so he could get to bed at a reasonable time.

When they eventually reached the apartment building, Tai locked his bike in the undercroft before leading Yolei up the stairs. He found the front door unlocked, indicating that Kari was already home. While he had seen her bike downstairs, it meant little these days. For she sometimes didn’t take it. Although what the reason for this was, he did not know. Silently he pushed the front door open and indicated for Yolei to keep the noise to a minimum. They took off their shoes and Tai beckoned for the lavender haired girl to follow him through the main living area and down the hall to Kari’s bedroom. Carefully, he took hold of the handle and turned it softly, hoping his sister had not locked the door. With a gentle push, he discovered that she had not. Ever so slowly, he opened it to reveal his sister sitting huddled on the floor, back resting against the bedframe. She had her headphones on and he could tell her eyes were shut.

“There you are,” he said, standing aside and indicating for Yolei to enter. “When she eventually comes home, she spends all her time in here.”

“Oh, Kari,” the lavender haired girl said as she crossed the threshold. “What has happened to you?”

Tai remained in the doorway and watched the girl walk towards his sister. Part of him thought about leaving. About going to his room and letting Yolei handle the situation. However, the overriding feelings of love he had for his sister and the desire to help and protect her, compelled him to stay. Even if the only thing that would happen would be for Kari to yell at him. With bated breath, he looked on as the lavender haired girl reached out a hand to give his sister a light shake.


	55. Pt4 09) The source of secrets

**Part Four: A Secret Discovered**

**Chapter Nine: The source of secrets**

Kari sat in her usual spot on the bedroom floor, knees huddled up to her chest. Yesterday had taken a lot out of her and even though she had gone to bed early, her sleep had been restless and so come this morning she had felt exhausted. She’d encountered Tai at the breakfast table but completely blanked him. If he hadn’t blabbed to their mother, the conversation with her would have been so much easier. It was his fault she had woken up feeling so tired. Her day at school had been shitty and served only to darken her mood. In fact, the only silver lining, if you could even call it that, was that today’s overriding emotion had not been sorrow. Instead, anger had taken root.

She was angry at her brother for throwing her under the bus last night. Angry at Yolei for continually asking her if she felt ok. She’d even got angry at some of the younger boy’s at school for accidentally hitting her with their football as she crossed the playground. So much so, that she’d kicked it away from them as hard as she could. Apparently, she now could kick the ball; who knew? However, above all that, she was angry at herself. The voice from the dark recesses of her mind had tried to kill her yesterday and she had since made the executive decision that she wanted to live. Which meant she needed to deal with it sooner or later. Except there was only one problem. Apart from yesterday at the river’s edge, the voice had not reared its ugly hissing tones since the immediate aftermath of her breakup with Tai.

Kari sat with her headphones on and Pink Floyd’s The Wall blaring. Her eyes were shut and she was concentrating hard. Where are you, you Bastard, she thought irritably. She’d been sitting searching her own mind for the hissing voice. Calling to mind memories that always attracted a strong dose of self-loathing since the start of the album. That had been almost an hour ago; The Wall now well into its second disc. Only the voice had remained silent. Why is it that the one time I actually want to talk to you, you decide not to show? No answer. Fine, stay wherever it is that you’re hiding!

In the outside world, a hand suddenly gripped Kari’s shoulder. Her eyes snapped open as she jumped. It took her a moment to recover from the shock. When she could process the information that her senses were relaying to her brain, she found herself face to face with Yolei. She jumped again. What the hell was she doing here? She tore her headphones off just in time to hear the lavender haired girl say, “Kari, are you ok?”

Shit, she thought in alarm as she gulped down some air. She’d been keeping Yolei at bay, hiding the fact something was wrong ever since her breakup with Tai. However, she knew being found huddled on her bedroom floor would serve as more than enough evidence that she’d been lying for weeks now. Great, she thought, just great. Yesterday it had been her mother, now Yolei. Between the two of them, she’d be lucky to get a moment's peace. They’d be checking up on her to see how she was doing every waking hour. It would be a nightmare. Especially given that she could see no way of moving on at present. However, the question still remained, how the hell had Yolei got in? Kari’s gaze moved past the girl who knelt in front of her and towards the door. Standing in the doorway, a worried expression covering his face, was Tai. The anger that had been slowly building inside her over the course of the day finally blew the top off the nuclear reactor that contained her pent up emotions.

“YOU BASTARD, TAI KAMIYA!” Kari yelled as she dropped her headphones to the floor and sprang to her feet. “I HATE YOU!”

Like the nuclear debris of a reactor explosion, the emotions that she had felt over the past few weeks rained down upon Kari as she darted for the door. She didn’t know where she was going or why. She just knew that she needed to get out. “GET OUT OF MY WAY!” she half yelled, half cried moments before she reached her brother.

In front of her, Tai stood his ground. If he was not willing to move, she would just have to go through him. Increasing her pace, Kari barrelled into him, but he remained upright. Quickly, his arms wrapped themselves around her. “LET ME GO!” she yelled as she began to thrash, but Tai’s grip remained firm. Unable to free herself, she began to hammer on his chest with her fists as hot tears began to pour forth. “TAI, I HATE YOU! NOW LET ME GO!” her voice had become a frantic wail now. “I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU!”

Her fists quickly ran out of steam and Kari all of a sudden felt weak. She buried her head into Tai’s chest and felt his strong arms shift so that one held her securely around the waist, while the other made its way across her shoulders. One of his hands then came around the back of her head and began to lightly stroke her cheek. Slowly, within the comforting warmth and security of her brother’s embrace, she started to calm. And at that moment, regardless of what she had just yelled, she knew that she could not hate him.

“Oh my god!” Yolei’s yell cut through the sounds of Kari’s sobs and Tai’s gentle soothing’s. She had completely forgotten that the lavender haired girl was there. “It’s you! You’re Mr Mystery!”

Kari froze as her spine turned stiff as a board. Had Yolei just said what she thought she had? She felt Tai raise his head from where it had rested atop her own and he asked, “who? What are you talking about, Yolei?”

The other girl it seemed had become so excited about her discovery, that she completely forgot the possible ramifications of making such an assertion aloud. “The person Kari’s in love with,” she blurted out but did not stop there, “tall, brown hair, an athletic body to die for, eyes that shine like the sun and above all, someone that she shouldn’t have fallen in love with…”

Kari twisted her body around so that she could stare at her friend. When their eyes met, Yolei immediately clapped her hands over her mouth. She watched as for a moment, the lavender haired girl’s gaze darted between herself and the towering figure of her brother.

“Oh my god, Kari, I’m so sorry!” Yolei practically yelled as a look of horror spread over her face.

An awkward silence descended and Kari quickly exchanged glances with Tai, who too still looked to be in shock at the revelation. She sighed. Her friend had been bound to figure it out sooner or later, she was too clever not to. And she knew that nothing either she or her brother said could convince her that she was wrong. It seemed that the Gatomon, Agumon and all the other Digimon were well and truly out of the bag now.

“It’s ok, Yolei,” Kari said softly, “he already knows.”

A stunned expression covered Yolei’s face, but it quickly shifted to one of amazement and wonder. Behind the girl’s large glasses, Kari could see her eyes sparkle. And no wonder, she’d just uncovered a real-life forbidden romance; like the stories she loved so much. A torrent of questions came barrelling out of the lavender-haired girl's mouth at breakneck speed. “Doseheloveyouback? Haveyoukissedhim? Arethetwoofyouacouple?” and so on.

Kari looked back at Tai, who seemed to have recovered from the initial shock. “I think we’d best go sit in the lounge,” he said slowly, a somewhat grim expression forming on his face.

She nodded in agreement and disentangled herself from his embrace. “Come on, Yolei. We’ll sit and talk about this in the lounge,” Kari said, beckoning her friend to follow Tai out of the room.

What exactly they were going to talk about, she did not know. She and Tai had never discussed what they might say if someone found out about them. Granted, even if they had, Yolei’s reaction seemed to be so atypical to what they would have expected, that anything they’d agreed upon would probably be irrelevant. They would just have to improvise. She led Yolei over to the sofa, while her brother headed for the kitchen.

“Do either of you want a soda?” he called out to the sound of the fridge door opening.

“Yes, please,” both girls replied as they sat down; Kari on the sofa and Yolei in the armchair.

A slight tension hung in the air as they waited for Tai to join them and it made Kari feel like snakes were slithering around inside her stomach. Someone had found out about their incestuous relationship… OH MY GOD SOMEONE HAD DISCOVERED THEIR SECRET! Panic started to fill her from the soles of her feet upwards, slowly turning her legs to ice. And she felt a strong desire to run. To run away and pretend that nothing had ever happened. Only she couldn’t. She would have to sit here, with her brother and tell their story.

Kari sneaked a glance at Yolei, who looked like she was sitting on hot coals, an excited twinkle in her eyes. She took a calming breath to try and steady herself. Her friend did not seem remotely repulsed by what she had just discovered. In fact, Yolei looked far more akin to a viewer waiting for the next episode of their favourite TV show to start, rather than someone who had just discovered a horrifying secret and had needed placating just to get them to sit down and hear an explanation.

When Tai eventually appeared, Kari took the soda he offered her and watched Yolei do the same. A synchronised series of clicks followed as each person opened their can. Her brother then placed a plate of cookies on the coffee table and sat down beside her on the sofa.

After a large gulp of soda, the lavender haired girl seemed to calm down a bit and regain her composure. “Ok,” she said between two steadying breaths, looking directly at Kari, “so you found out that you were in love with Tai two years ago. Around about the time we all did that magazine quiz, yes?”

Kari looked at her brother for some sort of assurance that it was ok for her to answer. He gave her the smallest of nods and so she replied, “that quiz was the clincher. After I’d finished my turn, I realised that I’d just described Tai.”

The eagerness on Yolei’s face was almost frightening and she barely waited a second after Kari had finished before asking, “the weekend you got your hair done, that’s when you told him, wasn’t it? You told me you’d talked with him and he’d helped you work some things out.”

“Yes,” Kari said.

“Why did you decide to tell him?”

“That day was the most fun I’d had in a long time. We ended up wrestling on the floor and I lost control of myself and kissed him full on the lips.”

Yolei clapped her hands over her mouth again, “oh no! What happened then?”

Before she could answer, Tai decided he wanted to establish himself in the conversation, “she ran from me and locked herself in her bedroom.” Kari turned to look at him and saw a faint smile on his lips. “I had to jump from the balcony in our parent's room to the one in hers, just so I could talk to her.”

“Oh my god, that is so romantic,” Yolei exclaimed and to Kari, it felt like she and her brother had just become characters in an elicit Shojo anime. “How did you react when she told you that she was in love with you?”

“I had to get her to tell me first,” Tai answered. “When she did, I think it’s fair to say that I was stunned.”

“I don’t think he quite believed me,” Kari added.

“That’s probably a fair assessment,” Tai then continued. “However, by the time you’d finished telling your story, it had sunk in that you were serious.”

“So what did you say to her?” Yolei asked excitedly and Kari could see she was almost on the edge of her seat.

“I told her I didn’t think I loved her in that way,” Tai said before taking a drink from his can.

“What’s that supposed to mean!” the lavender haired girl exclaimed.

Kari sensed that her friend might be about to tear her brother a new one and so quickly said, “he was trying to let me down gently.”

“Sounds more like false hope to me,” Yolei huffed as she scowled at Tai. “Kari had just told you her darkest secret. The least you could have done was be completely honest with her and tell her properly that you don’t feel the same way.”

Kari exchanged glances with her brother and they had a quick wordless conversation. It would be simple to end things here and have Yolei leave thinking that the story ended there. However, for some reason that she could not explain, they both felt compelled to carry on.

“I didn’t know it at the time, but if I had, it would have been a lie,” Tai then replied and he reached over and took hold of her hand.

The sensation of her brother’s fingers wrapping themselves around her own, sent a jolt through Kari, like a bolt of white-hot lightning and struck the pile of ash that her passion had become after the breakup. A metaphorical ashen cloud burst into the air inside her, momentarily blinding her from the truth of reality. And for those few precious moments, she felt the wondrous joy that she had only known when she and Tai had been together. Only the ash quickly settled back down and she remembered the cold hard facts; she and Tai were no longer a couple. However, unbeknownst to Kari, somewhere amidst the charred grey dust, a tiny ember glowed faintly. 

The lavender haired girl’s eyes darted from Tai’s face to Kari’s and then to their now joined hands. Her mouth fell open and for a few moments, she looked utterly gobsmacked. “No way,” she somehow managed to breathe. There was a pause for a moment, presumably to allow the truth to set in before Yolei exploded. “Oh my god! You love her in return! That is so romantic!” She paused again and turned to look at Kari. “You have to tell me everything and I mean everything. How do you feel when he takes you in his arms? What’s he like to kiss? How does it feel when you rub your hands all over that perfect torso?”

Kari fixed Yolei with a grim, despondent look.

“How big is...” her friend stopped mid-sentence, finally having taken stock of her expression.

“We’re not a couple... not anymore,” Kari said slowly as she hung her head.

“Wait... what?” the lavender haired girl said in disbelief.

“You wanted to know what’s wrong with Kari,” Tai then said. He gave her hand a light, reassuring squeeze. “Well, now you know.”

Kari looked up and saw her friend’s expression shift from confusion, to understanding and then to anger. Oh no, she thought, realising that Yolei had, unfortunately, put two and two together and come up with five.

“You broke up with her, didn’t you!” she virtually yelled at Tai, her fists clenching as she sprang to her feet. “That’s even worse than giving her false hope! You tell her that you love her, have some fun and then toss her aside once you’re done!”

Kari watched as Tai shrank back against the sofa under the intensity of Yolei’s assault. It always amazed her that her brother had been able to face the Dark Masters without a drop of fear but put him up against an angry girl and he was liable to run a mile in the opposite direction. However, in this instance, she didn’t blame him. Her best friend looked liable to rip his head off. She needed to intervene on his behalf. “It was nothing like that, Yolei,” she said calm but firm. “We ended things mutually.”

“If it was mutual, why have you been so depressed?” Yolei demanded, not sounding willing to let her brother off the hook yet.

“Because we were in love,” Kari answered. It hurt to say it in the past tense, especially given that she knew full well they still were.

“Kari’s not the only one who’s been suffering. It broke both of our hearts to do it,” Tai added, his voice laced with sorrow.

Yolei sat back down in the armchair, her rage apparently subsiding. “If you guys were in love, why did you break up?”

Kari’s eyes drifted to the floor in despondency. She’d recalled the memory of their breakup conversation too many times this week and did not wish to do so again. Fortunately, Tai elected to answer, “imagine what it would be like if Ken were living with you, but so long as someone else was in the house, you couldn’t express your feelings towards him. You can’t touch him, talk to him or do anything else that might expose how you feel about him in case someone saw you. If you’re lucky, you get a few hours per week where the two of you can be a couple. And even that has to be planned out and kept completely secret.”

“I think it would drive me crazy,” Yolei conceded.

“Exactly,” Tai said, “it’s emotional torture of the highest order. However, that’s not the worst part.”

“What could be worse than that?”

Kari raised her head and could see the painful expression on her brother’s face... could feel it through their joined hands. “The dark ironic reality of our situation,” she said bitterly.

“The dark ironic reality?”

“Yes,” Kari said, clutching Tai’s hand firmly. “We had to keep our relationship secret from our parents and everyone else we knew. Only, in the end, if we wanted to be with each other long-term, we would not have been able to keep it a secret.”

A look of tragic realisation spread across the lavender haired girl’s face and for a moment, Kari thought she might cry. The story of her real-life star-crossed lover's relationship having ended in tragedy.

“We decided to end it in order to spare each other from greater pain in the future,” Tai then said.

“But you can’t possibly know what might happen in the future or how people might react,” Yolei protested, as though she had a personal stake in matters. “Take me, for example.”

Kari watched as Tai shook his head. “Not everyone is as liberal and understanding as you are, Yolei,” he said sombrely. “Besides, we have a fair idea of how our parents would react.”

This explanation did not seem to be enough for her best friend. “But the two of you are in love! Not to mention the effect your breakup’s had on you both, especially Kari.”

“I’ll be fine,” Kari said, slightly defensively. “I just need to find a way to get over it, that’s all.”

“But...”

“I’m sorry, Yolei, but if you’re looking for a happy ending, you won’t find one here,” Tai then said firmly, bringing the story to an end. “Now I really need to get some studying done. I’m behind this week as it is.” Her brother let go of her hand, stood up from the sofa and picked up his soda can. He took a step to the side before he stopped and said, “needless to say, Kari and I would appreciate it if you kept this conversation to yourself. While we may have broken up, we’d rather no one else found out that we had a relationship.”

“Of course,” Yolei said with a nod of her head. “I understand.” She then turned to Kari. “I should probably head home. My mom will have expected me back almost an hour ago. I forgot to message her to say I was coming over here.”

“I’ll show you out,” Kari replied and got to her feet. 

“Kari, are you sure you’ll be ok?” the lavender haired girl asked, the concern evident in her voice.

“I’ll just have to be,” she replied as she led the girl to the door.

“If you want to talk, give me a call or send me a message. Or better yet, come over sometime tomorrow,” Yolei said as she put her shoes on.

“I’ll think about it,” Kari said in a non-committal sort of way. However, possibly betrayed her true feelings on the matter by saying, “I’ll see you on Monday.”

Yolei gave her a hug before slipping out into the steadily darkening evening. Kari let out a low breath as the door clicked shut. Not only had that been totally unexpected, but difficult to boot. However, in the long run, might prove beneficial. She now had someone to talk to. Only that would have to wait until she had managed to sort out her own head.


	56. Pt4 10) Solitary mind games

**Part Four: A Secret Discovered**

**Chapter Ten: Solitary mind games**

Kari Kamiya sat alone in her bedroom, back against the edge of her bed, bum firmly planted on the wooden floor. Her eyes were closed, yet inside her mind, she could see the room perfectly. The walls were painted in the same magnolia, all the furniture sat in exactly the same place as it did in the real world and the floor felt just as hard… just as cold. There was only one major difference here, the presence of the other girl.

Kari watched from her position on the floor, as the other girl picked up the desk chair and sat it down opposite her. With hair that transitioned from bright orange to yellow and then to blonde, with not a hint of brown to be seen, the girl was dressed in the Digital Punk outfit, complete with makeup. She sat down cowgirl style on the chair and Kari found that she could not hold the gaze of those reddish-brown eyes.

“So, you wanted to talk,” the girl said airily, breaking the deathly silence. “Well, here I am, so let’s talk.”

Kari did not know what to say, nor even where to begin. Eventually, the words, “I want you to leave me alone,” tumbled out of her mouth.

The other girl let out a slightly mocking laugh, before replying in a manner reminiscent of an old sci-fi film, “I’m sorry, Kari, I’m afraid I can’t do that.”

“Why,” she blurted out, already feeling helpless. Kari glanced up and tried to meet the other girls stare. “Why can’t you just leave me alone?”

The girl looked at her, a slightly devilish grin playing on her lips. “I thought that would have been obvious.” When a blank expression was all Kari could reply with, the girl rolled her eyes and said, “because I am you… and what I see is me.” There was a brief pause before she added, “or at least I see a hollowed-out shell that used to be me.”

“What do you mean by that,” Kari spat angrily, a slight spark desperately trying to ignite inside her.

“Take a look at yourself.”

Gaze quivering slightly, she looked down at herself. Her upper legs were clad in yellow shorts, while a pink and white sleeveless t-shirt adorned her chest. She also wore long, fingerless pink gloves. And she did not need to pull her bangs down in front of her eyes to know that her hair was brown. She did it anyway.

“Satisfied?” the other girl asked as she ran a few orange strands of her own hair between her fingers.

“But… this isn’t me, “Kari replied, slightly stunned by the revelation.

“Isn’t it?” the other girl asked rhetorically. “While you might not physically be wearing that old pink and yellow getup, haven’t you virtually regressed back to being that person?”

“No… I…”

“Or do you need me to go slightly further?” the other girl asked. When Kari failed to respond, she continued, “is every day you exist not akin to one of that yellow and pink lovers worst? The days where she remained quiet, only speaking when spoken to and even then with only short, simple replies? The ones where she never argued or stood up for herself? Where her confidence was non-existent? The days when…”

“Stop it!” Kari cried out in anguish, the terrible truth too much to hear spoken aloud.

The other girl simply smiled at her. “It hurts, doesn’t it? To see what I see when I look at you.”

“Yes…” she whispered softly. “…I didn’t realise how far I’d fallen. But I still don’t understand who you are.”

“I am you,” the girl said with a light chuckle. “Or at least all the bits of you that you’ve tried to purge.”

“Purge? Kari asked in confusion. She knew what the word meant, but could not fathom what the other girl meant by it.

“I’m all the parts of you that you’ve tried to get rid of. Ever since that date with Tai, you’ve been hacking away at yourself to try and stop the pain. Almost everything that makes you feel anything has been walled away to try and make it go away.”

“I just want it to stop,” Kari whispered, though not directly to the other girl.

“In fact, you’ve done such a good job that the only link I have left with you is…”

“…our music,” she interjected softly.

“Yes, but even that is fading,” the other girl continued. “You’ve not listened to much these past few days. However, even if you manage to contain that behind your wall, you might find that your pain does not go away.” She then gave Kari a firm look. “There is only one way to guarantee that it ends.”

Kari looked upon the face of this other version of herself that her own mind had created. She knew exactly what the girl was referring to. The pieces of the puzzle began to slot together inside her head. Now it made sense. She knew who this person was now. The hissing voice from the dark depths of her mind given form. The one that had plagued her for months before she told Tai her secret. And then resurfaced after the disastrous end to their date. The one that had… “you tried to kill me!” Kari yelled when her mind reached the events of a few days prior. She felt the spark of anger again try to ignite itself inside her.

The other girl shook her head, “I didn’t try to kill you.”

“Yes you did,” she spat as a small flame flickered to life. “You led me to the edge of the river and convinced me to throw myself in!”

“No, Kari, I didn’t,” the other girl replied, a serious expression fixed upon her face. “It was you that tried to kill us.”

“Lies!” Kari hissed, dismissing the claim outright. “It was you. You whispered in my ear. You told me that it would end my pain. You told me to kill myself!” Tears burst out from behind Kari’s reddish-brown eyes and her body started to shake as she stared at the other girl, who sat calm, but with a grim expression.

“It was all you, Kari,” the girl asserted, though her voice held no trace of malice. “You were in that much pain after you broke up with Tai that you could not fight off the darkness.”

“No, that’s not possible,” Kari cried out, unable to accept what the other girl said. “How can that be true?”

“Because you succumbed to it and have made its will your own. In effect, it is you and you are it.”

The revelation left Kari completely stunned. Yet as much as she wanted to deny it, to scream that it could not possibly be true, she knew the other girl had spoken truth. The hissing voice from the dark depths of her mind was now her. She spoke with its voice, enacted its will. Her teary eyes found those of the other girl’s. “Help me,” she said in a ghostly whisper, almost feeling her throat constrict in an effort to prevent the words from being uttered.

“I can’t, Kari,” the other girl replied in dismay. “Not until you find a way to accept your pain.”

“I don’t want to accept it, I want to be rid of it,” she wailed. “I just want it to stop.”

“It won’t,” the girl said firmly. “You need to accept what happened between yourself and Tai, but also that your pain is not a punishment that you deserve for your part in it.”

“But it was all my fault. He would never have gotten hurt had it not been for me.”

“Tai’s feelings were equally responsible for what happened,” the other girl countered. “He knew what he was getting into. You both suffered because of the feelings you have for each other. But you need to realise that everything else in your life, everything that I am, is not tied to your relationship with Tai.”

Kari listened to the girl’s words… her words, for they came from another part of herself. However, she had to suppress the urge to yell at her. To tell her that everything she said was a lie. The will of the dark part of herself that she had become, she realised. “My relationship with Tai, regardless of what state it is in, does not define me,” she eventually managed to breathe. The admission felt like a stone fragment falling from a crack that had just appeared in her mental wall.

“You’re right,” the girl agreed. “I know it will be hard and that you’ll still hurt for a while, but you can move on.”

“I hope you’re right,” Kari whispered in reply.

No matter what way she washed it, her pain would not just go away. However, she’d faced the alternative and did not like the idea of starring into the dark water again. It seemed that finding a way to move on was her only option. She took one last look at the self she now felt an urge to be again. “I’ll see you soon,” she said with a smile, the first genuine one she’d made since her date with Tai.

“Good luck,” the Digital Punk version of herself said, before fading from view.

Kari opened her damp eyes onto the empty room. She had fallen so far since running away from Tai on that fateful night. Now she had to find a way to pick herself back up. With a deep sigh, she wiped her eyes and took the first difficult step. Shakily, she picked herself up off the floor. Finding a tissue, she dried her eyes and took a deep breath. Her relationship with her brother was over, no if’s, but’s or maybe’s about it. That fact she just had to accept. But that did not mean her life had come to an end too. She had been down a deep hole before Tai found out about her secret and afterwards managed to pull herself out. Meaning she could do so again.

Moving to stand in front of the wardrobe mirror, Kari looked herself up and down. It might not have been her old yellow and pink attire, but the knee-length beige skirt and plain white long-sleeved top she wore reeked of that individual. That had to be the first thing that went. Tearing off the offending articles of clothing, she balled them up and threw them into the laundry hamper with a vengeance. Opening the side of the wardrobe that contained her new outfits, Kari ran a hand across the hanging garments. When she reached the Digital Punk one, she pulled it out and stared at it. Had she really had the confidence to wear this outside? Her mind cast up images of the night she had gone bowling with her friends. How night and day that person was to her old self… the self she had regressed back to. Glumly she put the outfit back. Like everything else, her confidence had been shot to pieces. There was no way she could go out wearing that in her present state.

Kari sighed. Could she wear anything from this side of the wardrobe? For a moment she stared despondently at the collection of outfits. She had to find something. _“Go back to the beginning,”_ a voice from deep inside her mind whispered, so soft she barely heard it. Her hand moved along the rail until she found her ripped black jeans and green weirdo t-shirt. The jeans had been the first thing she had ever customised and the t-shirt the first item she had bought from h.NAOTO. She pulled them out and quickly closed the wardrobe door.

What are you doing, she thought as she sat the jeans on the bed and removed the t-shirt from its hanger. You can’t possibly go out wearing that. Kari shuddered. Those words, so full of insecurity and doubt, were her own. No longer confined to the dark recesses of her mind, the hissing voice of disgust and self-loathing had become one with her own.

It was with great difficulty that she said aloud the word, “no,” in defiance of her own self. She did not want to be that person anymore. The one who had spent countless nights sitting on the floor, crying her eyes out over the love she had lost. She needed to move on and it started right here, with a pair of ripped black jeans and a slashed green t-shirt.

Further thoughts of protest filled Kari’s mind as she pulled the t-shirt on, quickly followed by the jeans. Again she stood in front of the mirror and for the first time in over a month, saw a faint smile on her lips. It may only have been two articles of clothing, but already she felt more like the person she wanted to be. Unfortunately, her hair looked a mess with all the brown now showing at her roots. Nothing she could do about that. However, that did not stop her from spiking it a bit. Rummaging around in her bottom desk drawer, she found her styling wax along with her makeup bag. Both had been unceremoniously shoved in there not long after the breakup. For the regressed Kari that she had become had needed neither. Rubbing some of the wax into her hair, she proceeded to mess it up; much better. She gave half a thought to applying some makeup, but on this occasion decided it would be too much too soon. Instead, she went back into the wardrobe and pulled out her short denim jacket. While common sense told her that it would probably be cold outside, wearing her pink winter coat would not only ruin the look but also destabilise the fragile pieces of her psyche that she’d started to cobble together. Putting on her headphones, she slotted her music player into the pocket of her jeans after hitting play on Guitars; one of the three albums Tai had bought for her. Finally, she stowed her purse and cell phone into the pockets of her jacket.

With one final glance in the mirror, Kari tentatively walked to her bedroom door. Her hand gripped the handle at the same time as she thought, don’t do this, Kari. She froze, as though a bitter-cold hand had touched her shoulder and instantaneously turned her body to ice.

_“That’s it, now take your hand away and go change out of those ridiculous clothes,”_ a voice that was not her own then hissed.

“No,” Kari said aloud in defiance. Sounding far more sure of herself than she felt.

_“What?” the voice replied, almost in disbelief. “I said take your hand away and go change out of those ridiculous clothes. Do it now, Kari.”_

“I heard you,” she said internally. “Which is why I’m able to say no. Your thoughts are no longer mine.”

_“You will not defy me, little Kari. You are mine!”_

A small grin formed on Kari’s lips as she replied, “not anymore,” and she turned the door handle.

_“No, stop this at once!” _the voice yelled at her.

“No.” She opened the door.

_“You’ve not heard the last from me!” _

“I know,” Kari thought internally. “I accept that you’re a part of me and one I will probably never be rid of. However, you don’t control me anymore. Now get back into the dark recesses of my mind where you belong.”

_“KARI!” _The voice screamed, but she paid it no more heed.

Walking to the front door, she slipped on her trainers, it was not the weather for converse after all and left the apartment. For the first time in weeks, Kari felt like herself. And it felt good.


	57. Pt4 11) Only time will tell

**Part Four: A Secret Discovered**

**Chapter Eleven: Only time will tell**

It was Saturday evening and the air temperature had risen slightly from yesterday’s bitter cold conditions. The sky, though steadily darkening, was a clear navy sheet on which the first twinkling of stars could be seen. The moon too, a waxing crescent that reflected beautifully on the surface of the still waters of Tokyo Bay, played its part in creating an almost romantic ambience. Tai Kamiya walked along a footpath that bordered the water's edge. Tonight he had dressed in blue jeans with his favourite orange shirt, atop which he wore his black winter jacket. Beside him, short ginger hair virtually hidden beneath a cerulean woollen hat was Sora.

After the conversation with Yolei last night, Tai had gone to his room, loaded up on his energy drink of choice, put Hawkwind on and studied late into the night. His reward had been six hours worth of sleep before his alarm clock had gone off and been thrown across the room. Unfortunately, he’d had the foresight to prepare for such an eventuality and set an alarm on his phone too, which he’d strategically left on his desk. By the time he had gotten out of bed and turned it off, he’d properly woken up. A quick breakfast and shower had preceded another long study session. However, by early evening, he had reached his limit.

It was coincidentally not long after this, that he’d received the text from Sora. She too, it had transpired, needed a serious break from the books. Half an hour later, he had left home and headed across town to meet her. She had been standing outside her own apartment, waiting on him. And Tai had got a distinct impression that she had not wanted him to come inside. Something he put down to her having had another fight with her mother.

The pair walked slowly along the waterside, neither in a rush to get anywhere. They’d talked a bit, but both had been content with a comfortable silence for the most part. Just being outside and away from their respective school books was enough. It was Sora who eventually spoke, “so have you had any word from universities yet?”

Tai turned his head to look at her. “Yeah,” he said without much enthusiasm. “Both Kyoto and Tokyo have offered me a soccer scholarship.”

“That’s amazing,” Sora exclaimed and reached out to give his hand a squeeze. “You must be so excited.”

“Not really. I have to get 75 on the entrance exam for Kyoto, or 70 for Tokyo,” he said glumly.

“Oh come on,” Sora almost yelled at him, “don’t be so defeatist. You can easily get 70 and if you really try, 75 is doable.” She fixed him with a stern look. “You’re not the airhead that’s only good at sports that a lot of people think you are.”

“Aren’t I? I can’t even study for a full day.”

Without warning, Sora punched him in the arm.

“What was that for?” Tai asked indignantly as he rubbed the impact site with his other hand.

“For being an idiot,” Sora said, showing absolutely no hint of remorse. “You, me and almost everyone else, have been studying like crazy these past few weeks. Sometimes it gets too much. Hence why we’re both out here instead of at home in front of our books. Besides, you think you have it bad? I have to get 80.”

Tai tilted his head as he looked at her. “So you’ve made up your mind?”

She nodded her head, “yes. I’m going to Kyoto.”

“How did your mom take that?”

Sora let out an audible sigh and he felt her squeeze his hand slightly tighter. “We had another huge fight a couple of weeks ago. In the end, I told her that I was going to Kyoto and she couldn’t stop me.”

“I bet that didn’t go down well,” Tai said, admiring her bravery. Sora had always been strong, even taking it upon herself to look out for all the other DigiDestined. However, her mother had always been her kryptonite. “How are you going to manage?”

Sora lowered her head and turned away from him. “It didn’t,” she said sombrely. “Mom thinks I’m being incredibly stupid. She’s barely said two words to me since.” They walked for a minute or two before she then said, “I’ve stopped working in the flower shop so I can devote as much time to my studies as possible.”

Wow, Tai thought. That must have taken a lot for Sora to have done. However, if she was serious about Kyoto, she would need the extra time to achieve that eighty-per cent.

“As soon as the admissions test is over, I start work at Yolei’s parents Ai-Mart. It’s a proper job, with a proper wage. They’re even going to arrange a transfer for me when I go to Kyoto.”

He gave her a warm smile. “Sounds like you’ve got it all figured out. I’m happy for you.”

“Thank you, Tai,” Sora replied and gave him a hug. “At least someone is…”

He put his arms around her shoulders and held her close for a few minutes. While not the same as when he held Kari, Tai could still feel a pleasant sense of warmth and love. He sighed internally. Even though his sister no longer hated him, they could never get back together. That door had been closed, locked and the doorway bricked up for good measure. At some point, he would have to move on. Or face spending the rest of his life alone. Maybe spending a few months with Sora, before she headed off for Kyoto, would do him good. His mind sniggered. That was being rather presumptuous, wasn’t it? He had no idea if she would even be interested. Not to mention the fact that he did not know if he was even ready to move on.

Tai released his grip on Sora and felt her do the same. His stomach rumbled as he looked at her. “You want to grab a bite to eat?” he asked.

The ginger-haired girl looked down at her feet. “I do, but since I stopped working in the flower shop, mom stopped giving me an allowance. I don’t have any money.”

“That’s ok,” Tai said and reached out a finger to lift her chin. Their eyes met, chocolate staring into maroon. “We’ll call it my treat.”

“Ok,” Sora replied tentatively, her lip trembling slightly, “but you pick where we go.”

“Fine by me.”

They set off and after only a few strides, Tai felt Sora’s gloved hand reach out and interlock itself with his own; he offered up no resistance. Was this a thing, he thought as they crossed the road? An indication from the ginger-haired girl that she still thought about him in that way. That the kiss she had given him all those weeks ago had not simply been reactionary. He’d certainly not talked to her about it. His breakup with Kari, having happened on the same day, had driven it from his mind and Sora had not brought it up. They’d renewed their friendship, but brushed that particular event under the rug. However, had it not simply been a reaction to the end of her relationship with Matt... he did not know how he felt if that was the case. Tai tried to force the thoughts from his head as his eyes scanned the street for some idea of where exactly they were and where he might find some decent food. It didn’t take long for him to recognise the surrounding shops and at the next junction, he led Sora around the corner and up the street to an inexpensive, but good burger bar.

“I might have guessed,” she chuckled when he held the door open for her. “You sure know how to show a lady a good time, Tai Kamiya.”

He gave her a grin. “Moochers can’t be choosers.”

Sora gave him a second punch in the arm for that comment but laughed all the same. They found a table and sat down. Tai picked up a menu that he didn’t really need to bother with; he already knew what he’d be having. However, it served as perfect cover for him to stare at his companion without arousing suspicion. While not Kari, Sora was still very pretty and he’d always liked her smile and the colour of her eyes. He shook his head. Was he going to compare everything about her to his sister?

“Something wrong, Tai?”

He jumped slightly on hearing the question, his mind still wrestling with itself. “No,” he lied quickly, though probably not convincingly, “I’m fine.”

Sora gave him a sideways look. “Did they take your favourite burger off the menu?” she asked with a sly smile.

He laughed as he said, “I don’t think the menu has changed since I first came here as a child.”

“The décor doesn’t look like it’s changed either,” she giggled.

A waiter came over and took their order and within fifteen minutes, their food had arrived. Tai attacked his meal like it had been the first he’d eaten in weeks. Granted, apart from his light breakfast that morning, he’d been living off of a stash of energy drinks and granola bars for the past thirty hours. When eventually he came up for some air, he saw that Sora was chuckling to herself. “Wha’s funie?” he asked through a mouthful of fries.

“You,” she replied with a giggle. “You haven’t changed since elementary school... at least not when it comes to food and eating.”

Tai swallowed the fries before answering, “I’ll take that as a compliment.”

Sora gave him a warm smile. “It’s true. You’ve grown up so much since then. You’re no longer the overconfident, cocky, inconsiderate boy you used to be.”

Tai took a bite out of his burger to stop himself from arguing. He was not particularly proud of himself as a child. The culmination of his faults manifesting in the worse possible way; Skull Greymon. That incident had rocked him to the core. And while some old habits had died hard, he liked to think he was a far better person because of the experience. Nevertheless, he, like almost anyone else, did not particularly enjoy having such old faults pointed out.

Sora shook her head. “I’m sorry,” she said and looked down at her plate, “that came out all wrong.”

Tai could hear the sorrow in her voice, so reached across the table and gave her hand a light squeeze. He waited until she looked up, before giving her a smile and saying, “given the number of times I’ve made that excuse with you over the years, you can have that one on the house.”

She blushed slightly. “I think you just proved my point.”

“What? About how I would probably have yelled at you and started arguing?” He left the door open for Sora to agree, but when it became apparent that she was too embarrassed to do so, he continued, “up until a year or so ago, I probably still would have. I guess I’ve learned not to fly off the handle so quick and that you sometimes have to listen to what other people say, even if you don’t like what you here.”

“You really have grown up, Tai Kamiya,” Sora said with a soft smile.

They finished the rest of their food, after which Tai bought her a milkshake and himself another soda. They drank in silence for a while and just when he began to suspect that Sora wanted to say something, but was having difficulty in doing so, she got his attention.

“Tai,” she said tentatively.

“Yeah,” he replied after swallowing a mouthful of soda.

“Let’s go to Kyoto together,” she blurted out before her cheeks turned scarlet.

Tai had no idea how to take the question and so stupidly replied, “what right now?”

Sora laughed and his idiocy seemed to settle her down somewhat. “No, Silly, after high school. You get 75+ and I’ll get 80+ and we can go to Kyoto together.”

Even after having the time period unnecessarily cleared up, Tai still did not know how to react. Sora had just outright asked him to move to another city with her. Talk about being forward or what. She hadn’t even asked him out yet, assuming that she even intended to do so. He stared at her dumbstruck as he thought this through. Surely that would be her intention. That they go to Kyoto as a couple, not just as friends. He did not know how he felt about that. Ok, scratch that, he did, sort of. His immediate reaction, dictated by his love for Kari, was automatically no. However, once accepting the hard fact that he and his sister could not be together, that left him feeling completely unsure. Resulting in the utterly useless response of, “umm.”

Across the table, he could see Sora’s expression quickly deflate. So to try and stop the lead balloon from hitting the floor, he asked, “do you mean as a couple... not just friends?”

The balloon caught itself and hovered an inch from the floor. “Yes,” Sora said softly. “I’ve done a lot of thinking since I broke up with Matt and I stand by what I said back then. I made a mistake, Tai. A huge mistake. It should always have been you. However, I completely understand if being anything more than just my friend would be weird for you now. So I’m totally ok if you wanted to go as just friends.”

So there was his answer. Just over a year ago, he would have given anything for a chance to be with Sora. But Kari had theorised that he had never been in love with her. Had she been right? Or was it possible for you to be in love with more than one person? Or was he simply searching for a reason why he shouldn’t turn her down? He sighed internally. He was madly in love with Kari, fact. But could not be with her. That relationship had no future. Hell, it was no longer even that. If he did move on, would it be so bad to do so with Sora? Or would it ultimately be akin to buying your second choice candy bar because your first was out of stock? You would enjoy it, but still pine for what you did not have.

Sora lowered her head again. “I’m sorry for putting you on the spot like this, Tai. I should probably go.”

He watched her start to stand and instead of just letting her go, he reached out and caught her trailing arm. “Don’t go,” he said softly.

She paused and turned to look at him. And he could see her trying to read his expression. Slowly she lowered herself back down into her chair but said nothing.

“I’m sorry too,” Tai began, choosing his words carefully. “It’s as much me as it is you.”

Sora gave him a faint smile but allowed him to continue. Apparently his twist on the age-old, ‘it’s not you, it’s me,’ malarkey earned him the right to an explanation.

“I suppose I should probably start by telling you that you weren’t the only one to have a breakup that day.”

Sora’s eyes widened. “Oh my god, Tai, I’m so sorry,” she paused before abruptly asking, “it wasn’t because I kissed you, was it? If so then I’m so, so sorry.”

“No, it was nothing to do with that,” Tai replied quickly. He was not sure exactly why he had decided to tell her about his breakup, but perhaps by talking to her about it, he might figure out what he wanted to do. Naturally, he had no intention of telling her that his girlfriend had been Kari. That would break both his sister’s trust and lead to a whole different conversation. “We decided that our relationship just wasn’t viable long-term, so mutually decided to end it before either of us got too badly hurt.”

“Tai, if I’d known, I would never have asked you about the possibility of us getting together,” Sora said apologetically.

“Don’t worry about it,” Tai reassured her. “I probably should have told you about it sooner.” It was only now that he said it, that the thought actually occurred to him. While he had barely seen anyone out with school time, he had spent quite a few breaks and lunchtimes with her. Maybe because it had been Kari, he had elected not to tell anyone. “Regardless, it’s over now and we agreed that we can’t get back together.”

“It sounds like you really cared about her,” Sora replied with an ever so slight stiffness to her tone.

“I did,” Tai said wistfully, then, choosing his words carefully again, added, “I think I might have been in love with her.” Such a half-baked version of the truth felt like a betrayal of Kari. However, if anything was ever going to happen between himself and Sora, he could not have her thinking from the get-go that she was simply a surrogate candy bar. He let out a low sigh. “I’m still hurting, Sora.”

It was her turn to reach across the table and give his hand a squeeze. “I understand. Once my anger subsided and I stopped outright hating him, it took me weeks to get over Matt. On balance, even though we spent the last few weeks in an almost constant argument, we did have some good times before all that.”

“We never had any arguments. Maybe that’s why it’s taking me so long to get over it,” as he spoke, Tai had to fight in order to stop a tear from falling. And wondered if he would always feel this way when talking about the relationship he’d had with his sister.

“It’ll take time, but eventually you’ll heal,” Sora soothed. “And if you want, I’ll be waiting for you.”

“I can’t answer that right now,” Tai replied truthfully. “Maybe after we get the results from our university entrance exam and I know what my options are, I’ll know if I’m ready to move on.”

Sora nodded her head. “I understand. We can talk about Kyoto after we get out results.”

“Ok,” Tai agreed, “but I’m not promising that I’ll even be able to get 75.”

She laughed, “you can get 75. However, not if we sit here for the rest of the night.”

He sighed. “We should probably head home and get back to the books.”

“I’ll be glad once this damn test is over and done with.”

They finished their drinks, paid for their meal and left the burger bar. Tai walked her back to her apartment before heading home. He’d gone out to try and give his mind a rest and wound up with even more to think about. Just his luck.


	58. Pt4 12) Picture that

**Part Four: A Secret Discovered**

**Chapter Twelve: Picture that**

It was Wednesday and for Kari Kamiya, the fourth day since she had combed her own mind and met with the shocking revelation about her own state of mental wellbeing. Since then, she had slowly been making progress in dragging herself out of her pit of despair. Just not fast enough for Yolei’s liking. She’d gone to see her best friend on Saturday afternoon and they had hung out together. However, come Monday morning, the lavender haired girl had decided that she still needed cheering up. Hence why Kari found herself with the girl in one of the drama rooms after school had finished.

“Will you hold still, Yolei,” Kari said in mock irritation. “This was your idea after all.”

“To help cheer you up,” her friend said indignantly. “I hope you’re aware that I’m effectively martyring myself for you, Kamiya.”

“A bit of eyeshadow isn’t going to kill you, Inoue.”

“A bit!” Yolei exclaimed. “The amount you’re putting on my face is insane.”

“Hold still,” Kari snapped, knocking the girl’s hand away, “I’m almost done.”

Her friend huffed, but she ignored her. Finishing up with the neon-yellow eyeshadow, Kari picked up the black lipstick. Carefully, she applied a thin layer to Yolei’s top and bottom lip. “Go like this,” she instructed and puckered her own lips. The girl did so, allowing her to touch up any cracks that appeared. “Ok and… done,” she said with a flourish and put the lipstick away in her makeup bag.

Kari held out a hand for Yolei to take and helped her friend to her feet. “Close your eyes,” she said and flashed the girl a smile.

“I swear if I fall and break my neck…”

“…you’ll probably be paralysed from there down and so won’t be able to do anything to me.”

Yolei scowled at her. “I beginning to wonder if I preferred you back when you were pink and yellow Kari.”

She laughed. “You don’t get it both ways, Yolei. Either you can encourage me back out of my hole and suffer the me that I am, or you can shove me back in there and get pink and yellow Kari instead. Now close your eyes.”

Her friend did as she was told, though not first without sticking her tongue out at her. Kari then led her over to the full-length mirror. She had been hesitant on Monday to come and do this photoshoot. The hissing voice still prevalent in her mind. So Yolei had gone all out to get her to agree and offered to model her Digital Punk outfit. She had eventually agreed, if only to stop the badgering. However, it had got her thinking about her wardrobe again and ignited a spark of creativity.

She’d taken some of Yolei’s long hair and tied it up into two knots atop her head, the rest she’d put into a single braid. The rest of the get-up was the way she herself had last worn it. Black and neon-yellow jeans, with the left leg cut off at the knee and the words Digital Punk written down the right. Matching converse; one of each colour. And a black vest with slashes across the front and back, with the edges flecked with the same neon-yellow colour; like she was bleeding. Accessories consisted of a matching checked wristband, a black choker and a silver necklace in the shape of a lightning bolt. While makeup included the aforementioned eyeshadow and lipstick, along with nail polish that alternated between black and neon-yellow.

“Ok, open your eyes,” Kari said with a smile, admiring her handiwork.

Yolei did so and they immediately widened as her mouth fell open. “Holy crap, Kari, what have you done to me!”

She felt the corners of her lips begin to curl as she replied, “I just punked you up a bit.”

“I would never believe you wore this outside if I hadn’t already seen it. Hell, I feel scared to even walk out of this room. Where did you get the confidence to wear this outdoors from?”

Kari’s smile faded slightly. “I’ll let you know if I ever find it again.”

Yolei tore her eyes away from the mirror and fixed her with a sincere expression. “It’ll take time, but you **will **get over this.”

She sighed, “I know. I finally accepted that I’m not defined by my relationship with Tai.”

“That’s good because you’re not,” the lavender haired girl said firmly. “You’re a strong individual that is her own person. No one else should ever define you.”

Kari was about to answer, when the voice hissed inside her head, _“no you’re not. You’re not strong, little Kari. You’re weak....”_

“Shut up,” she yelled internally. “I don’t need to listen to you.”

_“You can’t silence me, little Kari. I am you. I control you!”_

“Kari...”

“No, you don’t! Now go back to the dark recesses where you belong.”

“Kari...” She jumped when Yolei’s hand touched her shoulder and her eyes found the heavily shadowed ones of her friend, “you ok?”

“Yeah,” she breathed, feeling herself shake slightly.

“Do you want to take the pictures now... before I lose my nerve?”

Kari felt another shiver run down her spine and gave her head a quick shake. “Yeah, lets,” she said firmly, more for her own benefit that Yolei’s.

She watched as her friend took a deep breath and stepped away from the mirror. “Where do you want me?”

She looked around the room. In the far corner were a white backdrop and a set of lights for taking photographs. It seemed the photography club, of which she had once been a member, had moved classrooms for this academic year. “Over there,” Kari said, pointing towards the backdrop. “Just let me get my camera.”

Yolei headed for the corner while Kari procured her camera from her bag. This one had been gifted to her two years ago but had seen little use over the past twelve months. Slightly bulkier than the one she used to wear back in the pink and yellow days, it had a much higher resolution and far more settings. She thumbed through them now as she wandered over to where Yolei stood.

“Ok, just stand natural for me and I’ll take a few practice shots,” Kari said as she focused the camera on the lavender-haired girl.

Her friend did so without comment or complaint and so once satisfied with the camera settings, she took the first shot. It came out too dark, so Kari switched on the lights and did it again. It took a further three shots, each followed by a tweak of the camera’s settings before she was satisfied. “Ok, we’re good to go,” she said and gave Yolei a smile.

For the next hour, Kari moved and positioned the lavender-haired girl as though she were a manikin. Taking several shots from different angles, before switching her into the next pose. They laughed, joked and complained at one another throughout and she started to feel herself relax… dare she say it, happy. It seemed Yolei had been right, this had been exactly what she needed. She was having fun and had managed to put all thoughts about Tai to the back of her mind… until her friend decided to broach the subject.

“So what was it like?” Yolei asked from her position atop a wooden box.

“What was what like?” Kari replied as she took a quick series of shots.

“You know… being with Tai.”

Slowly she lowered the camera, unsure of how to respond. It was no surprise that Yolei had finally decided to ask about her relationship. Indeed, Kari had expected it to come up on Saturday. Such was the girl’s love of gossip and forbidden romance stories. For a moment she thought about simply declining to answer. She and Tai had kept the entire thing a secret from everyone after all; as they had planned. Only Yolei had found out. Maybe talking about it would help her move on. Would Tai mind? Possibly. However, after how douchy he had been to her last week, he could not complain.

Kari’s eyes flashed around the room and then to the two doors, to ensure they were alone, then let out a low sigh. “It was magical… at least the time when I could be with him was.”

“How did you find out that he was in love with you?” Yolei asked eagerly.

She raised her camera and took another couple of shots, before replying, “remember that night when we all went bowling?”

Yolei nodded as Kari stepped forwards and repositioned her on the box.

“It all happened after I went home that night. Unbeknownst to me, Tai had been struggling with his feelings ever since I had told him.” She lowered her head slightly, recalling the bloody mess she had found her brother in. “In hindsight, I knew something was wrong with him that night but was too excited about going out with you guys to stop and question him when we passed in the doorway. Regardless, when I got home, I found him sitting on the floor of his bedroom with the lights off. We talked for a while and eventually, I got the truth from him.” For Tai’s sake, she omitted the details about him having cut himself.

Yolei tried to turn her head to look at her, but Kari quickly moved it back into position. However, that did not stop her asking, “why didn’t he tell you sooner?”

She moved to stand in front of her friend once more and raised her camera. “He was doing the whole overprotective big brother thing and trying to spare me from any hurt that might result from a relationship that he knew I wanted.”

“So typical Tai then.”

“Be quiet for a moment and give me a sassy smile,” Kari commanded, waiting until she got exactly what she wanted from her model before taking the shot. She then took some more from a few different angles.

When she had finished, Yolei quickly said, “so what happened when he told you? And I mean straight after he told you.”

“I was speechless and couldn’t comprehend the possibility that he had just told me the truth,” Kari replied as she checked through this set of shots on the camera’s small screen. “I actually had to get him to say it again before I believed him.”

“And then…” Yolei encouraged, almost on the edge of her box.

“…and then we shared the most delicate and beautiful of kisses.” She lowered the camera to see her friend positively giddy with excitement. “Until that moment, I had no idea it was possible to feel that amount of love from someone…” Kari brushed a tear from her eye at the memory and stepped forward to reposition her model.

“I’m sorry, Kari,” Yolei said sincerely. However, that did not stop her asking, “so what happened then?”

“We fell asleep lying next to each other,” she paused to shift one of Yolei’s arms, then added, “fully clothed, before your dirty little mind gets any ideas.”

The lavender-haired girl gave her a sour pout and Kari could not be sure whether it had been directed at the insinuation or how much clothing she and Tai had slept in that night. The girl then said, “keep going. I want to hear everything.”

“Fortunately, our parents were away and didn’t get back till late Wednesday evening. We had five glorious days together…” she paused to readjust the camera.

“…then you had to start hiding how you felt,” Yolei finished for her. “That must have been difficult.”

“It was agony,” Kari conceded as she started taking this, the final set of pictures. “In fact, we almost ended things the next morning.”

“But you didn’t,” the lavender-haired girl sneaked out as Kari moved around her.

“No… but perhaps it would have been better if we had. It might not have hurt so much then…” she let the sentence hang as she took the shot. “Anyway, it was nine days before we had the chance to be together again. Nine shitty days,” she emphasised.

“I bet the two of you were a raging ball of hormones that night.”

“Shush,” Kari said firmly, “unless you want me to leave those knots in your hair. Then you’ll have to go home like that.” However, a grin had crept across her lips at the memory of **that** particular night. “We might have lost control a little bit that night.”

“Oh my god, did you sleep with him!” Yolei exclaimed, ruining the shot.

She gave her friend a stern look as she deleted the picture and retook it. “I said a little bit, not all sense of reason.”

“Ok, so you didn’t go all the way, how far…”

Kari looked at the second ruined shot, lowered the camera and glowered at her overly talkative model. “Yolei, if you so much as breathe one more word before I’m done, I’m stealing your clothes and you can walk home as you are.”

Her friend’s expression soured, but she complied none the less. In silence, Kari retook the last shot and moved around to get the rest. When she was done, she lowered the camera, stepped forward and offered a hand to help Yolei down from atop her box. “You can talk now,” she said with a grin.

Kari had barely finished talking when the lavender-haired girl reiterated, “how far did you guys get?”

Though she remained silent, her cheeks began to flush. Yolei must have seen this as she quickly leapt upon it, “was it top halves only or did you bear all?”

Even though it had only been the former, Kari felt her cheeks darken. However, while she did not feel one-hundred per cent comfortable about talking about the intimate moments she had shared with Tai, in order to stop her friend from assuming the latter, she said, “it was top halves only.”

This answer did not stop Yolei from squealing, “holly crap! You guys made it to second base after only **two** weeks. That’s insane! You barely knew each…”

Kari gave her a look that said, really.

Her friend took a deep breath, before saying, “ok, but you guys had only just started going out. Surely you needed to get to know him as a boyfriend.”

She laughed. “No offence, Yolei, but I know Tai far better than you know Ken, even before we had a relationship.”

The girl opened her mouth, perhaps to argue, then quickly closed it again; conceding the point. Instead, she started changing back into her school uniform.

Kari bagged up the various components of the Digital Punk outfit as Yolei took them off. “There was nothing Tai and I needed to learn about each other that we did not already know. I already knew that he would respect my boundaries, as he knew I would his. All we did was set some ground rules early on and that was that.”

“So what was he like to kiss?” Yolei asked once she had finished changing.

She threw a pack of makeup removal wipes at her friend in response to her having asked such a personal question. However, while she packed away the rest of her stuff, she answered, “it felt like we were two flames joined together in a fiery dance.”

Yolei laughed. “Way to go all metaphorical on me.”

“I can’t describe it any other way and I don’t want to. It was beautiful…” she trailed off as she remembered the last proper kiss they had shared and how it felt as though her flame had died when their lips had parted, leaving only a pile of grey ash. She shook her head and wiped her eyes. “If you’re done removing the makeup, sit down and I’ll sort your hair.”

“Actually, if you don’t mind, I think I’ll keep it like this. I kind of like it.”

Kari gave her a devilish smile, “there’s hope for you yet, Yolei. Maybe next time there’s a party or you have a date, I can dress you for it.”

“I might let you do my hair, but there is no way I’m giving you free rein on my outfit and makeup.” They collected their bags, turned out the lights and left the classroom. Halfway down the corridor, Yolei then said, “you miss him a lot, don’t you.”

“More than anything,” Kari replied, her voice full of sorrow.

“Do you want to get back together with him?”

Kari stopped, turned to look at her friend and simply nodded, as a few tears rolled down her cheeks. A moment later and she felt herself being pulled into a hug.

“Why don’t you then?” Yolei asked as she gently began to rub at her back.

“I can’t,” Kari cried, feeling the wounds start to open anew. “Ultimately, our relationship only caused him pain. Tai would have been better off if I hadn’t lost control of myself that night and kissed him. He could have remained blissfully ignorant.”

“I don’t think Tai would see it that way,” Yolei said firmly when she eventually released her grip. The girl then offered her a tissue.

Kari took it and dried her eyes. “That doesn’t change the fact that it’s true.”

Yolei reached out and took hold of her free hand. “Come on, I’ll buy you a crepe and a hot chocolate before we go home.”

Without protest, Kari allowed her friend to lead her through the building and to the exit. She could have said no and simply went home. However, she’d been down that road so many times lately that she knew exactly where it ended; with herself huddled on the bedroom floor in complete misery. She could not go down that road again. She still had a lot to work through and it would take time. But it was easier to do when she had someone to talk to. Besides, today was supposed to help cheer her up and it had done just that prior to this conversation. So she would be damned if it ended with her back on that damn floor.


	59. Pt4 13) Déjà vu

**Part Four: A Secret Discovered**

**Chapter thirteen: Déjà vu**

The school week had reached its hectic finale and ended with a crescendo of pencils being tossed onto desks and books shoved roughly into bags. For once it seemed as though the entire class were united in a, fuck this shit, attitude towards their workloads. Indeed, when he left the classroom, Tai had heard several different groups huddled in talks about blowing off their studies that evening, or tomorrow, or on Sunday, or even all of the above. The idea was tempting, all of them in fact, he thought as he wandered through the packed hallways. Like everyone else, he had been working flat out for weeks on end and was beginning to feel burnt out. Mid-January could not come soon enough. Maybe he would only do a few hours when he got home and then take the rest of the night off. His parents had gone to check up on his grandmother and would not be back until tomorrow, he could have the TV to himself, unless…

Tai’s expression dulled as the thought of Kari floated into his mind. It would be awkward being alone in the house with her. Especially if they needed to have dinner together. No, he couldn’t sit there and eat with her, while they both pretended like nothing was wrong. He would spare them both the discomfort and eat his dinner in his bedroom, he decided. And if Kari wanted to watch TV, maybe he would go out. He could always give Teiko a text and find out where she was partying tonight.

Making his way outside, he went to the bike racks, fetched his bike and wheeled it towards the main entrance. Weaving between the milling crowds, who’d want to mill in this cold, he exited out onto the street and was about to hop on when, “hey, Tai, wait up.”

Tai clapped a hand over his eyes and shook his head on recognising the voice. He rolled his eyes. What on earth did she want this week? “Hey, Yolei,” he said with a slight grimace. The memory of what had happened the previous week still fresh in his mind. “What’s up?”

“Not much,” she said cheerfully. “I had to come over to this part of town after school to fetch a package for my mom,” the girl indicated the brown paper-covered parcel under her arm. “I’m heading over to your place anyway, so I’ll walk with you.”

Tai elected not to point out that he was already mounted and ready to ride off. Besides, if Yolei was heading over to his place, she would certainly get a chance to yell at him for being rude. Kari might even back her up if the mood took her and she had not yet fully forgiven him for his recent transgressions. It was at that moment that a thought struck him, “if you’re going over to see Kari, why didn’t she just come with you after school?”

“She wanted to stay behind and discuss something with our world history teacher, but I needed to get over here before the store shut. So We agreed just to meet back at your place,” Yolei answered without hesitation.

Tai looked at her suspiciously but dismounted all the same. Perhaps he was just being paranoid, but he could not shake the feeling that this felt a little too convenient. They set off and he indicated to Yolei that she could put her package in the bike’s basket, which she gladly did.

After they were out of the vicinity of the school, the girl turned to him and asked, “so how have you been coping since you and Kari broke up?”

He allowed the question to hang in the air for a moment, before curly replying, “fine.” He might have known that this had been her intention; fishing for gossip about her new favourite story of forbidden romance. Well, he had no intention of supplying it to her. She was Kari’s friend first and foremost. If she wanted details, she could ask his sister.

Yolei took his reply and immediately went on the offensive, “well, I’m glad you can be so blasé about it and have been able to move on so easily. Kari’s not been that lucky.”

The twin barrels of the lavender-haired girl’s shotgun-like attack hit him straight in the chest and he felt an immediate pang of guilt for his sister. The last thing he wanted was for word to reach her, which it certainly would and in less than half an hour, that he had moved on so easily. He sighed. “Ok, so I lied,” he said apologetically. “I’ve only just properly come to terms with the fact that it’s over.”

Yolei’s expression lightened slightly but still indicated that her finger was firmly on the trigger. “What was it like for you, being with Kari?”

“I’m not about to spend the journey home allowing you to indulge your love for forbidden romance,” Tai said flatly.

Bang! The metaphorical sound of the girl’s shotgun rang in his ears as she let rip with her second shot. “This has nothing to do with me! It’s about **your **sister and the fact that she’s struggling to move on. I’m trying to help her, but she’s reluctant to open up to me. And since you can’t do anything directly, I was hoping you might have the decency to give me some info so I can try and understand where she’s at.”

Tai sighed. Had that not been his own intention when agreeing to take the girl to see his sister the previous week? He hadn’t planned on her finding out about their relationship, but now that she knew, she might actually be able to help Kari move on. “Ok, you win, I’ll talk,” he said in resignation. “Just put the shotgun away.”

The girl flashed him a wicked smile, reminiscent of the ones he’d loved/hated seeing on his sister’s face. Apparently, she got the joke. “What was it like being with Kari?” she then reiterated.

After a moment’s silence, Tai replied, “blissful. She’s perfect in every way.”

“How did you feel when you shared your first proper kiss?”

Tai thought back to that night. To sitting on the floor in a pool of his own blood as he slowly willed himself to become numb to the pain of having to suppress his love for his sister. To Kari’s arrival and how she had brought light back into his world. How he had broken down into tears as she slowly teased the truth from him. And then that moment when their lips had touched. “It felt so liberating and so right.”

Yolei gave him a gentle smile. “How difficult was it for you to keep your feelings for each other hidden while around your parents.

He waited until they had crossed the road before answering, “it was torturous. We had five days alone together because our parents were away… five perfect days.” He let out a small laugh, “it felt like we were a married couple, rather than a pair of stupid school kids. Unfortunately, mom and dad came home and all of a sudden we had to go from that to keeping our feelings hidden at all times. I guess you could say that the honeymoon period had ended.”

“What happened then?”

“We had to suffer nine crappy days before we could be alone together. Then another six before we had the chance to go on a proper date,” Tai answered. It hurt remembering the scant few times he and Kari had managed to be together after those initial five days. He could only hope that the information might do Yolei some good, as the trip down memory lane was not doing him any. He would need another good strong dose of Hawkwind when he got home this evening.

“You guys went on a date?” the lavender-haired girl asked with interest.

From the way she spoke, Tai could tell that the part about it having nothing to do with her had been a fib. Regardless of her good intentions, Yolei was enjoying hearing about his relationship with Kari. Nevertheless, he started telling the story. “We went to a cinema in Minato city after one of my soccer games, then for noodles.”

“How did you guys feel?”

“I was nervous at first, especially on the way to the train station,” Tai began, recalling the put down he had received from Kari for trying to zone out on her. “I kept thinking that everyone that looked at us could tell that we were siblings and so shouldn’t be holding hands.”

“How was Kari?”

“She was actually ok. Apparently, she had been a nervous wreck during my game, but forgot all about it when the stand erupted after my second goal.” A thin smile crossed his lips and he chuckled to himself as he recalled the conversation they’d shared around the subject.

Yolei gave him a smile. “Did the two of you have fun that night.”

“Yes, it was magical…” he said before pausing, the memory of how the night had ended now prevalent in his mind. His sister in tears as she ran from him at the train station and her continued mumbled apologies as he tried to talk to her to find out what was wrong.

“What happened?” the girl beside him asked, her tone suggesting that she sensed something had gone wrong.

Tai didn’t answer. Instead, he just kept walking, his mind lost inside one of his most painful memories.

“Tai…” he felt a hand tug at his sleeve and it quickly drew him back to the here and now. Yolei was looking at him with both compassion and concern. “Something happened that night, didn’t it, something bad?”

Still he did not respond.

“Tai, this sounds like it’s important, which means I need to know about it if I’m going to be able to help Kari.”

He took a deep breath before he answered, “when we got back to the train station, I took Kari aside so I could give her a proper kiss before we got home. However, something about the whole situation made her begin to question everything that we had done. All of a sudden she wasn’t sure if she could cope with the long, torturous periods between the brief moments when we could be together.” He hesitated, wondering if Kari might hate him for sharing something so personal, before finishing, “in the end, she broke down into a flood of tears and ran from me… that was the beginning of the end.”

Much to Tai’s surprise, Yolei reached out an arm and pulled him into a half hug. “I’m so sorry, Tai,” she said softly. “That can’t have been easy for you.”

He elected not to waste time indulging in the girl’s sympathy. He just wanted to get this story over with, get to his room and put Space Ritual on. “I barely saw Kari over the next three days, that was until she messaged me late on Tuesday night and asked if we could go for a walk. We went down to the river and discussed the logistics of a long-term relationship. That’s when we decided to end it.”

“You miss her, don’t you?”

“More than I’ve ever missed anything in my entire life,” Tai confessed.

They crossed another road in silence and for a moment, Tai thought that Yolei was done. However, she then asked, “do you want to get back together with her?”

The question came as a surprise and before Tai could stop himself, he had uttered, “yes.”

“Then why don’t you?”

“Because I’ve caused her nothing but pain, hurt and anguish,” Tai lashed out, his feelings now raw and untampered. “If I had never told her how I felt, she’d still be happy. Just like she was after she got her hair done and started wearing the sort of clothes she wanted to wear.” He watched as Yolei flinched upon receiving both barrels of his very own shotgun. “Sorry,” he uttered by way of an apology.”

“It’s ok,” the lavender-haired girl said, quickly regaining her composure. “However, Kari won’t see your relationship or you that way. I bet she wouldn’t have traded it for anything.”

Tai shook his head, but deep down knew that she was right. He felt slightly relieved when he saw the girl fish inside her bag for her cell phone and then busy herself with it. Hopefully it meant that their conversation had come to an end. It did. Five minutes later and without another word between them, they reached the apartment building. Locking his bike in the undercroft, he gave Yolei her package before the pair headed upstairs. And Tai couldn’t help but feel a strange sense of déjà vu about the whole situation as he opened the door and the pair stepped inside.


	60. Pt4 14) State of play

**Part Four: A Secret Discovered**

**Chapter Fourteen: State of play**

Kari stood in front of her open wardrobe and flicked through her clothes. She was still having trouble finding the confidence to wear things from the punky side of the rail but knew she had to persevere. The hissing voice had already come, said its shit and been shouted back into its hole. Purposefully, she plucked the black leggings with the ribbon running down the legs from the rail and hung them on the door. She’d never actually worn them, having bought them and then planned to customise them to fit in with the red vs blue outfit she had designed, but never got around to making. That was something she needed to correct. After the photoshoot with Yolei, she had started to feel creative again. Maybe she should go into town this weekend and see if she could find the other bits she needed to make to outfit.

On her desk, Kari heard her phone vibrate. Leaving the wardrobe for the moment, she picked up the device and flicked it open. A text from Yolei. She opened it and read, _“hey, really need to talk to you. On my way over, be there in five mins.” _She rolled her eyes. Great, just fucking great. Trust Yolei to decide to drop in on her while she was in her undies. Returning to the wardrobe, Kari quickly flicked through the t-shirts and pulled out the black one with scrawled red writing all over it. Removing it from the hanger, she pulled it over her head. What the hell was so important that Yolei couldn’t have called her or arranged to meet her at some later time? In annoyance, she pulled the leggings down and stuffed her legs inside them. Finally, she picked up her black choker and put it on.

She was just pondering whether or not to put her red-tartan skirt on atop the leggings when she heard, “Kari, can you come here a sec,” shouted from the main living area in Yolei’s unmistakable voice. Well, that was rude, just barging into someone’s home without knocking. And so much for five minutes. With a long-suffering sigh, she closed the wardrobe and left her bedroom.

Kari had barely stepped down the hall before the lavender-haired girl was atop her. “There you are. Come on, I have something I really need to talk to you about,” Yolei said and grabbed her by the wrist. Before she knew what was happening, Kari found herself being dragged across the main living area. At the front door, she could see Tai pulling off his shoes. Not rudeness on her friend’s part then, just good timing. She felt another pull on her arm as Yolei strode towards her brother. Before Tai even had the chance to look up, the girl had grabbed hold of his wrist. “You too,” she said firmly.

“Yolei, what the hell!” both siblings said in unison as with a herculean display of strength, the lavender-haired girl marched them over to the sofa.

“Sit,” Yolei commanded as she shoved them backwards. Their legs hit the edge of the sofa and they both collapsed down onto it.

Tai and Kari exchanged puzzled glances before they turned their attention to the lavender-haired girl. Like a drill sergeant, she stood over them with her hands on her hips.

Tai was the first to speak, “what the hell, Yolei,” he reiterated. While his brain was still trying to process what exactly had just happened, he knew one thing for certain, the girl had planned this from the get-go. And he’d literally walked right into it. At least Kari had the excuse of being caught completely off guard.

“Shut up,” the lavender-haired girl barked.

This response caused Kari to try a more diplomatic approach, “Yolei, what’s going on? Is something wrong?” Even though the events of the past few minutes had left her completely bewildered, she had a suspicion as to what this would be about.

“You too,” Yolei snapped and she glared at both of them. “Firstly, the two of you,” she then said, firm and no-nonsense-like as she held up a finger, “are a pair of complete and utter idiots.” Both siblings opened their mouths to argue but were swiftly cut off. “Secondly,” a second finger popped up, “not only have you made yourselves totally miserable, but you’ve each done it to try and prevent the other from becoming so. Well, in case either of you has failed to notice, it’s not worked.”

When Yolei paused, Tai took the opportunity to yell, “we didn’t have a choice!”

“Of course you had a choice!” Yolei barked, completely overriding his protest. “You still have a choice.” The lavender-haired girl raised a third finger. “Third and most importantly, the two of you miss each other more than anything and both of you want to get back together.”

Kari’s gaze shifted to her right where she met that of her brother’s. She could see the sorrow in his eyes and knew that Yolei’s words had cut him just as deep as they had her. Her hand trembled as she reached out for his. It felt cold and she could feel a foreign sense of uncertainty from him. “Is she telling the truth?” she asked, afraid of hearing either answer.

Tai lowered his head, unable to keep gazing into those beautiful reddish-brown eyes and all the pain they held. “I miss you more than anything,” he said slowly, seeing little point in denying it now. “I take it you feel the same?” he asked, not needing her to answer. Yolei had played both of them it seemed.

As soon as she heard Tai’s words, Kari knew that her best friend was right about everything. How she had got her brother to spill his guts, she did not know. But that was merely academic now. She nodded her head and whispered, “yes.”

“Surely the two of you can see that you belong together,” Yolei said after a moments silence.

“It’s not that simple, Yolei,” Kari said slowly. “I wish more than anything that is was, but it’s not.”

“Kari’s right,” Tai added. “All our relationship resulted in was both of us getting hurt.”

“No it didn’t,” Yolei snapped. “I’ve talked to both of you and each of you said that the moment’s you shared were magical. The only reason that you got hurt was that both of you got scared and pulled the plug on it.”

“We had too,” Kari cried out. “The issues with having a long-term relationship were just too great.”

“And what you’re having to deal with now isn’t?” Yolei asked though it sounded more like a demand.

Both siblings opened their mouths to say that it wasn’t, but neither of them could actually bring themselves to do so. They both knew the situation they were in was far worse than they had expected.

“I thought as much,” Yolei said firmly. “Your idea might have worked if you had never acted on your feelings for each other. But you opened Pandora’s Jar and have seen what’s inside. And you can’t just shove the contents back in and hope to forget about them.”

“Isn’t that supposed to be Pandora’s Box?” Tai interjected.

“In the original Greek tale, it was a jar. It only became a box when someone incorrectly translated it...” Yolei stopped and shook her head. “Besides, that’s not the point! The fact of the matter is, neither of you can forget what it was like when you were together. And those memories aren’t going to go away. They’ll keep haunting you and continue to make you miserable.”

Kari lowered her head and had to resist the urge to cry. “You’re right, Yolei, about everything. But it doesn’t change the long-term problems.”

“Hang the long-term problems. You’ve got plenty of time to figure out what to do about them.”

“We’re sorry, Yolei,” Tai finally said. He knew the girl meant well and was just trying to help them, but he’d had enough. The conversation on the way home had been bad enough without adding this one on top of it. Now he had to live with the fact that he knew for certain that Kari wanted to get back together. How was he supposed to restrain himself when he knew she wanted the exact same thing he did? “We know we’re both miserable, but that’s just something we need to work through.”

“URGH! The two of you are impossible!” Yolei exclaimed as she threw her hands into the air.

Deciding that he needed to shut himself away inside his room post-haste, Tai got to his feet. “I need to go study.”

“I’ll show you out,” Kari said softly as she too stood up. She had no desire for company now. She just wanted to go to her room, put some music on and try to drown herself in it. However, as Tai brushed past her, she felt her gaze follow him and felt the urge to say something stupid. Only before she could stop herself, she blurted out, “Tai, since you’ll need to eat sooner or later, do you want to order a pizza... maybe play a round of Mario Kart?” Why on earth had she just asked her brother that? How was she supposed to sit there and suppress her feelings if he said yes? Did she actually want to torment herself?

Tai stopped mid-step. Crap! Why did Kari have to ask him that? Just say no, he told himself firmly. She’s surely just being reactionary. Just say no. He opened his mouth to do so, only instead found himself mouthing, “yeah, I’d like that.” Idiot! Why the hell did you just do that? Do you have some masochistic desire to torture yourself? Before his tongue could get him in any more trouble, he walked away to his room.

Shit, Kari thought. Damnit, Tai, why did you have to be an idiot too! If you had just said no, we’d both be off the hook. Shit! With an internal sigh, Kari led Yolei to the front door, unable to see the thin smile on her friend’s face.

“Have a good night, Kari,” the lavender-haired girl said as she gave her a hug.

“You too,” she replied, trying to suppress the bitterness in her tone.

This wasn’t her fault or Tai’s. If Yolei hadn’t just yelled at them on the sofa, they could have enjoyed separate dinners within the confines of their own bedrooms and been content in their slightly less miserable states. Now they were going to have to sit through pizza and Mario Kart and be properly miserable. She opened the door, ushered her friend out and closed it again. Kari sighed. It seemed tonight had just become a lot more complicated.


	61. Pt4 15) Embers

**Part Four: A Secret Discovered**

**Chapter Fifteen: Embers**

The door the Tai’s room clicked shut and he pressed his back up against it and let out a long, slow breath. Well, he had not expected **that**, when he decided to do the polite thing and walk home with Yolei. A small laugh of hysteria escaped from his mouth. If either of his parents had been in it would have been a complete disaster. He could just imagine their faces if they walked into the main living area to see the lavender-haired girl yelling at them to get back together. Had she known they would be out, or simply not cared? It mattered little.

When he settled down, Tai quickly got changed into blue jeans and a long-sleeved red top, before sitting down at his desk. Robotically, he removed his books from his school bag, his mind still fixed upon what had just happened. A melancholy smile formed on his lips. He and Kari both knew exactly where the other stood now. And would have to try and live with that truth, yet never act upon it. Opening a notebook and his world history textbook, he found a pen and his music player. However, his mind still lingered on his sister. When she’d reached out and taken his hand, a spark had ignited inside him where once a burning fire had existed. A fire that had been forcibly extinguished the night of the breakup. And for one blissful moment, it had felt like they were together again. Except that was all it had been and all it could be. The harsh reality of the situation had soon set back in. Kari suffered because of his actions. He was bad for her.

Tai put his earbuds into his ears, found Space Ritual on his music player and hit play. He stared at the first question in the textbook, only his brain refused to leave the events that had just transpired in the lounge. Why had Kari invited him to have pizza and play Mario kart with her later? Was she simply trying to restore the sibling dynamic between them? Or was this a thinly veiled attempt to get them back together? Why on earth had he said yes? Despite the fact he had a mountain of studying to do, how could he possibly sit on the sofa with her and keep his feelings suppressed? This was going to be torture. He should have said no. Should have told Kari that he had too much work to do and that he would eat whatever he could find in the fridge. His left hand instinctively made to scratch at his right wrist, but he managed to redirect it to the orange stress ball that sat on the desk surface. He gave it a few firm squeezes before easing off to a light fumbling. Irrespective of everything he’d just thought, he could not deny that part of him, a fairly hefty part, was thrilled at the prospect.

Tai flicked the volume on his music player up to maximum and let the pounding rhythm of Born To Go drive the thoughts from his mind. He would deal with Kari when the time came to sit with her and eat pizza. His stomach let out a low growl, something that he could not ignore. Fishing in his school bag, he withdrew a granola bar, ripped it open and bit into it. In only a few bites he had devoured it. That should keep his stomach sated for a little while. Picking up his pen, he re-read the first question and started to compose his answer.

Space Ritual had come and gone, as to had Hall Of The Mountain Grill. By the time the last notes of You shouldn’t do that, the first track on In Search Of Space, transitioned into You know you’re only dreaming, Tai felt a hand lightly touch his shoulder. He jumped slightly, turned his head to look at his sister and pulled one of his earbuds out.

“Sorry for disturbing you, Tai,” she smiled softly at him, “but I thought you’d want to pick a pizza topping. I’m going to order soon.”

He looked upon her soft features and felt a warm glow deep inside his chest. Even though she smiled, he could see the torment that hid beneath the surface. It was there in those beautiful reddish-brown eyes. Desperately, Tai wanted to reach up, take his sister in his arms and tell her that everything would be ok. Tell her that he would never leave her and…

“Tai?”

He shook his head upon hearing Kari say his name, “huh?”

“What pizza topping do you want?” Kari said, a look of endearment on her face.

“Umm,” he replied dumbly. Apparently, he had become so lost in his own musings that he had completely forgotten that she’d asked him the question. “Why don’t you just get pepperoni and sweetcorn on the whole thing,” he said, picking the same topping that she would have in order to save his brain the trouble of actually choosing something.

“Are you sure?” his sister asked with a slight tilt of her head.

He nodded, “yeah.”

“Ok, I’ll go order it and come get you when it arrives.” Kari gave his shoulder a light squeeze before turning to leave.

Tai watched her go, his eyes coming to rest on her backside by the time she reached the door. A compilation of their make-out sessions flashed through his mind and he could recall perfectly what it felt like to have his hands clamped firmly around her petite ass-cheeks. His brain then served up the coup de grâce, the moment when they had mutually climaxed during that night when passions had overflowed and they had almost lost all control. He shoved his other earbud back into his ear and picked up the rhythm of the track, allowing the swooping electronics to push the thoughts of his sister from his mind once more. He managed to work through the bulk of the album, however, by the final track, his focus had gone. His stomach felt empty again and thoughts of Kari had started to seep back into his brain. When the music stopped, he threw down his pen, tossed his earbuds down atop his notebook and rose from his chair.

Fetching the GameCube and Mario Kart: Double Dash from the shelf, he left his bedroom. Heading down the hall, he saw Kari at the front door. It seemed his timing couldn’t have been better. Crossing the main living area towards the TV, he bent down and hooked up the games console and stood up just in time to see Kari sit the pizza box down atop the coffee table.

“Do you want a soda, Tai?” she asked.

He licked his lips and realised that he’d not drank anything since before leaving school. “Sure,” he replied and watched her head towards the kitchen. He sat down and waited for her to return.

Kari joined him on the sofa and he pondered whether it would have been safer if he’d taken the armchair. Too late now. Instead, he opened the pizza box and took in the aroma of hot cheese and pepperoni. His stomach growled loudly and he felt his mouth begin to salivate like he were some sort of cartoon character.

“Go ahead,” Kari said with a low chuckle, however, it sounded to Tai like the laugh of someone who had forgotten how.

His stomach needed no more encouragement than that. Picking up the first slice, the cheese almost dripping over the edges, he wasted no time in taking a bi… “AH HOT, HOT, HOT!” Tai yelled through a mouthful of what felt like molten lava in his mouth.

From beside him, Kari let a hollow laugh. “Well, you’d complain if it had arrived cold.”

He couldn’t reply as he was too busy tossing the hot piece of pizza around his mouth to stop it lingering long enough in one spot burn him. It took a full thirty seconds before it had cooled enough for him to start to chew. When he could finally swallow, he stared at the offending slice in his hands with a sour expression, before turning to his sister. “Why do I always feel like you use me as a gunny pig?”

“You make it sound like I forced you to eat the first slice,” Kari replied, now reaching out and picking up one of her own.

An almost awkward silence descended while they ate the pizza. And by the time Tai booted up Mario Kart, it had become clear that a return to the sibling dynamic was not likely to happen. At least not anytime soon. They picked characters and started the game. However, neither managed to play anywhere near their best. So much so, that the CPU opponents actually won some of the races. Come the final race, Tai just wanted it to be over. Then he could go back to his bedroom and be miserable alone. Sitting here beside his sister, as predicted, was torture. Every time he snuck a glance at her, he saw that beautiful face and the pain it hid beneath its flawless features. Like it had become a mask that hid the real Kari underneath. He’d done that to her. If he had been able to control his own feelings, she could have remained ignorant, happy and free. It was almost cruel, what he had done to his sister. He’d liberated her from the metaphorical cage she’d locked herself in. Given her a taste of true freedom. Then shoved her back inside, locked the door and dangled the key just out of reach.

It was with zero satisfaction that Tai crossed the finish line to win the last race and the tournament as a whole; his first since discovering Kari’s proficiency. A quick glance at his sister’s screen showed that she had been right behind him and armed with a green shell. She’d let him win. Exactly what she would have done prior to being liberated. He tossed his control-pad onto the coffee table, let out a sigh and turned to face her.

Kari gave him a faint smile, “guess you finally beat me.”

Tai just stared at his sister. He hated seeing her like this, so quiet, restrained and fake happy. It wasn’t fair! He forced his eyes to look into those perfect reddish-browns. She stared back and instead of the sorrow that he expected to see, he found something else. Desire and… hunger. Like a laser beam from some sci-fi movie, Kari’s gaze penetrated him and set off some kind of explosion amidst the burnt-out remains of his passion. In an instant, an inferno raged inside him and he knew but one thing, he wanted her more than anything.

Tentatively, Tai edged towards his sister, drawn in by her captivating beauty. She did the same. Their hands touched and it felt like a spark of electricity jolted him. Had he imagined it, or could it simply have been a bit of static? He didn’t care, as their eyes gazed deeply into one another’s. Faces hovered inches from each other’s for a brief moment, while a quick non-verbal conversation took place.

_“I want you more than anything in the world.”_

_“I want you too.”_

In what could only be described as pure primal desire, Tai and Kari’s lips met in a flurry of sharp kisses as they almost devoured each other. Arms wrapped around torsos and began furiously finding their way underneath tops. Tongues duelled in a battle for dominance and teeth dragged across lips, almost drawing blood. Then in a frenzied scramble of hands, Kari got the upper hand over her brother and tore Tai’s top off over his head; tossing it aside. He felt her fingernails drag down his chest as he grabbed the bottom of her t-shirt. In one swift haul that raised her arms up into the air, he pulled it off. However, he was not done yet. Before she could resume her assault, he reached behind her back with his hands and fumbled with the clasp of her bra. It came free and as he reached for the straps, Kari wriggled herself free. Before the bra even hit the floor, the sibling's bodies had crashed together and the battle recommenced.

Shoving his sister backwards onto the sofa, Tai straddled her but quickly found himself hauled down on top of her. His lips found hers and he fought for supremacy. As his tongue slipped past her teeth and began exploring her mouth, his hands slid between their bodies and he gripped her breasts. She moaned under his touch and he felt her dig her nails into his shoulders, dragging them down his back. He winced slightly and smiled. So she wanted to play rough, did she.

Kari felt her brother hesitate for a moment and it gave her all the impetus she needed. Forcing Tai’s tongue out of her mouth with her own, she broke off the kiss and planted her lips on his neck. She sucked hard and grazed her teeth against his skin. To which he retaliated by pinching both her nipples. Her body convulsed slightly and she let out a muffled cry. However, she had no intention to allow his action to derail her and so she bit him, hard.

“Ahh,” Tai winced as he felt a stab of pain. Causing him to relinquish his hold on her now solid nubs.

Kari seized the initiative, wrapped her arms around him and rolled them over. There wasn’t much space on the sofa, but she managed to get herself on top without sending them both tumbling to the floor. She could feel the wetness in her crotch as she pressed it against the large bulge in her brother’s pants. Her fingers found Tai’s nipples and she began pinching them, revelling in each and every one of his moans. The sheer intensity with which the inferno raged inside of her was enough to override any inhibition or restraint that she had tried to place upon herself since they had broken up.

Tai writhed in pleasure underneath the teasing and toying ministrations of his sister’s nimble fingertips. And it took him several moments before he regained enough composure to actively engage in the dual once more. Deciding to play Kari at her own game, he reached up and seized her small breasts in his large hands. Squeezing and kneading them elicited a series of grunts and moans form her that sounded devilishly divine. However, she responded in kind by intensifying her pinching.

Soon they were both caught up in some sordid, sexually charged game of chicken. Each sibling letting out a yelp or a cry of increasing pitch as the other toyed and twisted one or both of their nipples. After Tai had twisted Kari’s to the point that she let out a yelp, she knocked his arms aside and descended on his left nipple with her mouth. He let out a loud moan as she sucked, that transitioned into a strong though stifled cry of pain when she sunk her teeth in. Before the pain had even subsided, Tai retaliated. Wrapping his arms around Kari’s back he rolled them over.

“Oh no you don’t!” she exclaimed, her mouth having disengaged with his nipple.

Using Tai’s own momentum against him, Kari forced him to continue rolling. Except there was no more sofa for him to roll onto. Bodies interlocked, the siblings slipped off the low sofa and crashed to the floor. Momentarily winded, they disengaged just long enough to gulp down some precious air, before their overflowing passions sent them crashing back together in a furious primal display of raw, carnal sexuality.

As she had been on the bottom when they were up on the sofa, Kari had landed on top and thus taken less time to recover than her brother. Resulting in her pinning him to the floor. With all the gusto of a horny dog that has caught the scent of a bitch in heat, she pressed her crotch against the throbbing lump in Tai’s jeans and began to furiously hump him.

“Urgh,” Tai moaned as he felt the pressure of his sister’s clothed crotch rub up and down against his hidden penis. Reaching up, he pulled her down atop him and caught her mouth with a strong kiss.

Raw passion exuded from the siblings, their hot sweaty bodies interlocking. Hands danced around like bolts of lightning, exploring each and every scrap of naked skin. Tongues duelled like swashbuckling fencers. Grunts and moans filled the air as both fought with tooth and nail for dominance. Tai rolled Kari over and took control of the thrusting for a few moments, only for his sister to roll him back. They continued on like this as each tried to force the other to orgasm first.

Tai could feel the pressure building as the frequency and intensity of the pleasure waves increased. After another few thrusts, he found himself flipped. His back hit the floor and he let out a gasp as the air was knocked out of his lungs. His sister descended upon him and in a few hard humps, drew a series of short sharp grunts from him. This was it he was going to… “URGH!” Tai yelled at the top of his voice, so loud that it echoed around the apartment. Inside his jeans, he felt his penis expand as his cum exploded from it, sending pleasure coursing through him like hot jets of molten lava. His eyes glazed over and he zoned out for a second, his mind hurtling through space like he were on some sort of cosmic bullet train.

A devilish smile covered Kari’s face for a split second when she heard her brother’s scream of pleasure, knowing full well that she had won the dual and forced him to orgasm. However, the moment quickly passed and her thrusting resumed its intensity; she had her own orgasm to achieve now. It had been slowly building, like a boulder being pushed to the top of a hill, but every time Tai had got her close, she had found a way to suppress it. Unwilling to let her brother win. However, now she couldn’t force the bastard to tip over the edge. No matter how she rubbed, humped, thrust or grinded against him, the damn thing would just not go.

Tai returned to his senses, just in time to hear a whimper escape from his sister’s mouth. His eyes refocused and he could see the frustration on her face; she couldn’t get herself to orgasm. While he felt almost completely spent, he could not… no, would not, leave his sister high and dry. From somewhere deep within, he found the strength to roll her over one last time. Grabbing her shoulders, he caught her right nipple with his mouth and began to furious suck. All the while thrusting at her with everything he had left in the tank. The frequency of Kari’s moans shot up, urging him to continue. Inside his own jeans, he could feel his penis begin to soften. He did not have long before it became fully flaccid and thus useless. Holding onto her with only one hand as he bucked her silly, Tai groped at her left breast with his right hand until he found the stiff nipple. In one synchronised barrage, he sucked, pinched and thrust for all he was worth.

“ARGH!” Kari screamed as at long last the boulder toppled over the cliff edge. Her entire body convulsed and her legs locked around her brother’s hips like vice grips as pleasure cascaded over her. Her eyes rolled and she shot through a swirling void made up of every colour imaginable. It was pure bliss.

Limply, now completely drained, Tai rolled off of his sister and lay beside her on the floor. Both were panting for breath and drenched from head to toe in warm, sticky sweat. At this moment, neither cared about the potential ramifications of what they had just done. What this meant for them as siblings or a couple. From the moment their hands had touched on the sofa, it had been sheer bliss. For Tai and Kari, right here, right now, nothing mattered except each other.


	62. Pt4 16) From the ashes

**Part Four: A Secret Discovered**

**Chapter Sixteen: From the ashes**

A faint noise, somewhat akin to Velcro being ripped, filled Kari Kamiya’s ears as she sat up from where she lay beside her brother on the wooden floor. She glanced behind her and could just make out the faint watermark, that lingered where her sweaty torso had just resided. That had been… intense. She would have asked herself what the fuck had just happened, only she knew too well. The tension between herself and Tai, built up over five weeks of almost complete self-imposed abstinence from each other in virtually every conceivable way, had finally blown the barrel of gunpowder. The only surprise had been that they’d managed to refrain from actual intercourse. Last time this had happened, she’d felt relieved afterwards that they had kept trousers on. This time… this time she was not so sure. She wanted her brother more than anything and in every conceivable way. No, she corrected herself, needed him. So sure of this truth, she now felt prepared to give up everything else in order for them to be together. Was she still afraid? Of course. The prospect of their parents finding out scared the hell out of her. However, she would ride out the inevitable tidal wave of anger, so long as Tai stood with her.

Tai remained on his back, his breathing still trying to regulate as he watched his sister sit up. Even if he’d wanted to, he doubted there was anything he could have done to stop what had just happened. And he felt absolutely no regret about it. The immediate aftermath of their breakup had shown him just how madly in love with Kari he was. Highlighting exactly what he had lost. Ever since, he had wrestled with the idea that they had made a mistake. But forced himself not to tell her so. All in the name of keeping her from further harm. Yet this past week had shown just how bad the breakup had been for both of them. They needed each other. It was as simple as that. Except the same issues still existed. They were siblings. Their love taboo and almost certainly sinful in the eyes of their parents and friends; bar a few exceptions. And if they wanted to be together long-term, it could not remain a secret. So what did they do?

Kari looked down at her brother, a grin plastered across her face. For the first time since their ill-fated date, she felt one-hundred-per cent happy. She extended a hand, which he took and helped him to sit up. Lazily, she then trailed her fingers down his muscular torso. There would need to be a conversation of sorts between them, that much was certain. And she did not yet know what the outcome might be. However, for the moment, she just wanted to remain in this bubble of bliss with her brother. “Did that feel good?” she asked in a slightly seductive voice; she felt playful.

Tai rotated his shoulders, causing one to pop before he met her gaze. “Totally,” he breathed, his brain not yet up to speed. He felt her fingers gently caress his chest and so moved a hand over and wrapped it softly around them. “How about you?” he asked. The extra push it had required to tip her over the edge had taken a lot out of him. “Did it go properly in the end?”

“Damn thing just wouldn’t go for a while, but when it did,” she paused as her grin spread from ear to ear, “it felt fucking amazing.” Kari gazed deeply into her brother’s chocolate eyes and leaned her head forward. She found his lips and planted a soft kiss on them. While her mind was ready for round two, her body still needed time to recover. That was new, she thought. Whether solo or the two times she had been with Tai, once had always been enough. However, tonight her hunger did not feel sated. The furnace inside her was still ablaze and she wanted more.

Tai rubbed his free hand down his sister’s arm, her soft skin feeling exquisite under his touch. All the while, his lips shared in the tenderness of her kiss. The primal, carnal desires may have subsided, but he still felt a strong need to touch and hold his sister. Only he was becoming acutely aware of just how sticky his torso was and of the rapidly cooling mess inside his boxers; it felt extremely icky. Shower first, sister second, he decided as he broke off the kiss. He saw her pout when he motioned to stand up.

“I really need to shower and clean myself up,” Tai said as he picked himself up off the floor. “But I’ll be back, promise.”

Part of Kari began to feel cheated when her brother stood up and she had to resist the urge to pull him back onto the floor. A bead of cooling sweat trickled from the nape of her neck and down her back. Serving as a reminder that she too was in need of a clean-up. “I’ll shower too,” she replied, now resigned to the fact that round two was not going to happen here and now. On hearing her own words aloud, a devilish smile formed on Kari’s face. One that her brother did not see, as he had already started to walk away. She waited a few moments before cobbling together their scattered clothing and heading for her bedroom. From across the hall, she heard the sound of the shower turn on and paused. Was she ready to bare all in front of her brother? That was a stupid question when she thought about it. Tai had seen her naked when they were kids; the night she had wet the bed. Still, that had been a long time ago. She was a woman now and he a man. And that made a difference. Taking a deep breath, she slid her thumbs inside the waistband of her leggings. This felt right. She wanted Tai to see her. To rub her naked body against his. She let out a light laugh as she slipped them off along with her pants. It would be just her luck that her brother did not yet feel comfortable about the idea. Oh well, only one way to find out. Completely naked, Kari left her room and headed for the bathroom.

After turning the water on, Tai pealed his jeans and boxers off and tossed them aside. His now flaccid penis leaked a thin thread of cum that came to rest against his left leg; eww. Grabbing a wad of toilet paper, he cleaned himself up. However, curiosity got the better of him and he could not resist a peek inside his discarded boxers. As expected, given he could not recall the last time he had masturbated, he’d shot a large load. He would need to clean them before dumping them in the laundry hamper. The shower was hot when Tai climbed inside and the cold glass of the doors quickly steamed up. He stood and let the water cascade over him, easing off his stiff muscles. The fall from the sofa, followed by the continual rolling around on the hard floor, had left him stiff and slightly tender in places. The price you paid when playing rough. But it had felt damn good. A sudden waft of cold air hit his back and he instinctively turned his head. His eyes almost popped out of his head at the sight they were confronted with. The shower door was open and there stood Kari, butt naked.

“Room in there for two?” Kari asked with a sultry smile. Her eyes roved up and down his back, eventually settling on his tight backside. She licked her lips; delicious.

“K…K…Kari,” Tai stammered, unable to stop himself ogling her slender frame. When words failed him, he stepped away from the door by way of inviting her in. While it may have been hot in the shower, he could still feel his cheeks burn.

“Seriously, Tai?” Kari said with a laugh, on seeing the embarrassment on her brother’s face. “Surely you’ve seen a naked lady before.” She stepped into the shower and closed the door behind her. “Hi,” she said sweetly, her eyes lit up like a pair of headlights.

“You’re the first one I’ve seen in the flesh,” Tai admitted as he turned around to properly face her. It was only fair. He’d seen her, now she got to see him.

Kari’s eyes looked her brother up and down and the corners of her mouth turned upwards. God, he was hot. Her gaze gravitated towards his flaccid penis, which admittedly, seemed rather small. She recalled the bulge she had felt in his pants earlier. He was definitely a grower. “Let’s keep it that way,” she then said with a wicked glare.

A shiver ran down Tai’s spine when he saw the look on his sister’s face. He’d forgotten just how scary and evil she could look. And his mind conjured up an image of her wearing black, thigh-high leather boots and a black bustier while holding a bullwhip. He would submit to her every whim if she ever decided to dress like that; she looked formidable. He felt the blood rush downstairs and his penis began to stiffen.

Stepping forward and beneath the water jet, Kari reached out and touched her brother on the shoulder. “If you’re uncomfortable, I can leave,” she said softly and gave him a warm smile.

Tai felt the gentle touch of his sister’s hand and stared into her big, pretty eyes. “I don’t want you to go,” he replied, perhaps conveying more than just his feelings about the moment. He reached out a wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her towards him.

Their wet bodies came together and they embraced each other. Gazes met and wordlessly conveyed the love they shared before lips touched in a passionate kiss.

Kari felt her brother’s erect penis between them and smiled internally. All the while, hot water rained down over them. When she eventually broke off the kiss, she found the sponge and squirted some shower gel onto it. Gently she began to rub it over Tai’s torso and down his arms. “Turn around,” she commanded in a slightly high pitched voiced, laced with authority.

Tai did as Kari ordered and turned around. He felt her scrub his shoulders, then work her way down his back. She spent significant time ensuring that his backside got clean, before continuing down his legs. Steadily, he felt her run the sponge up the inside of his right leg until it reached his groin. Her hands then reached out around his waist, one of them cupping his erect cock and balls, while the other ran the sponge all over them.

“Aww, you’re all erect,” Kari whispered into her brother’s ear with a smile that he could not see. Gently she tightened her grip on his balls and began to massage them. She dropped the sponge and lightly stroked her right hand over the top of his shaft.

Tai felt a surge of pleasure as his penis grew to its full length and girth. He let out a light moan underneath his sister’s delicate touch. Her breasts were pressed into his back and the sensation of her wet, naked body against his own felt heavenly. Like a doll, he allowed her to play with him. To touch and stroke, caress and squeeze. Then he felt a push in the back and he staggered forward, pressing his hands up against the glass to stop himself crashing into it. In one quick movement, Kari splayed his legs, gripped his shaft in her right hand and began to tug. A loud gasp that quickly transitioned into a series of moans escaped from Tai’s mouth as she began to jack him off. Small bubbles of pleasure rose to the surface and burst with each and every stroke and he loved it. He then felt her free hand snake its way up his torso and begin to rub at his left nipple. “Urgh!” Tai cried out as the wondrous sensations intensified. Before long she had him panting for breath in the stifling heat of the bathroom, his orgasm rapidly building.

“You’re mine, Tai Kamiya,” Kari whispered evilly in his ear, as with a few rapid strokes and a twist of his nipple, she made him come.

Arching his head backwards, Tai let out a yell of ecstasy as glorious waves of pleasure crashed down over him and he shot his second load of the evening against the glass wall of the shower. Lightheaded from a combination of pleasure and the heat, his knees almost gave way as he collapsed forward against the glass. Gasping for breath, he felt a firm pair of arms wrap themselves around his torso to help keep him upright. That had been incredible.

“Easy there, Brother,” Kari said with a light chuckle. “Don’t go passing out on me.” She momentarily shifted a hand, blindly found the temperature dial and turned it down slightly. Her hands then lightly stroked his torso in a soothing manner. “How was that?” she asked with a grin, already knowing the answer.

The best Tai could offer was a light grown, his body still rocked by the strength of the orgasm. He heard her chuckle again and offered no resistance as she helped him straighten up and turn around to face her. The sight of his sister, this goddess, with water dripping from the ends of her lit-match hair, filled him with warmth and love. He would do anything for her. However, that did not stop a question popping into his mind. One to which he could only hope the answer was yes. For the idea that she had done this with someone else filled him with maddening jealousy. “Was that you’re first time?”

“Why? Feeling jealous, Tai?” she replied airily, his words almost having caused offence. Did he think she had been this intimate with either TK or Davis? She’d only been fourteen for the bulk of her relationship with the former and not long turned fifteen when with the latter. While she had done things with Davis that she was not overly proud of, it had not gone further than him feeling her breasts while still fully clothed in the sex department. She looked him in the eyes. “This is the first time I’ve touched a real penis,” she said matter-of-factly. Not that she hadn’t seen plenty of pictures and a singular sighting when a boy in her class had a wardrobe malfunction at the pool.

Tai felt the jealousy wash away like his cum off of the shower glass. And he couldn’t help but feel overjoyed that Kari hadn’t done any of this with her previous boyfriend’s. Perhaps because he hadn’t done any of this with his previous girlfriends. It just felt right that they were completely exclusive to one another. His mind stopped in its tracks. While they would undoubtedly talk after this, the outcome seemed certain. He gave her a smile before bending down and picking up the sponge. “It’s your turn to be cleaned, Sister.”

Kari raised her arms, placed them behind her head and seductively flexed her hips as she said, “you’re the boss.” She watched Tai lather the sponge with soap before he began rubbing her under the armpits. It felt slightly coarse against her skin. He then moved it across her chest, lightening his touch when he passed over her breasts. Steadily, her brother worked his way down her body, crouching down so that he could do her legs and reaching around to do her back. When he stood back up, Kari caught a glimpse of the grin on his face before he pushed her back against the wall. His lips pressed up against her own and she felt his foot lightly nudge her legs apart. She moaned into the kiss when he began to rub her breasts. A moment later and her body quivered as he rubbed a single finger over her clitoris. Under his gentle touch, Kari turned to putty in her brother’s hands and let out a string of, “uhh’s.” His fingers began to pinch and squeeze at her clit, sending sparks of pleasure through her body. Between two fingers and his thumb, he suddenly started to work up a rhythm. All the while continuing to toy with her left breast. To use her own analogy from before, it felt like someone had put a rocket into the boulder as it zoomed up the pleasure mountain towards the climax. She started to buck her hips into his hand and let out a loud, “urgh!” when Tai broke off the kiss and started to suck her right nipple. Like before her brother began to furiously rub, pinch and suck. And Kari knew this was it. Thrusting her vagina into his hand, she let out a shriek of delight, “AHHH!” as the boulder zoomed over the edge and she climaxed hard.

Like he had done minutes earlier, Tai felt his sister’s body convulse and then relax. He wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her into a hug in order to stop her sliding down the wall of the shower. Because her legs had locked, his other hand was still pressed firmly against her vagina. “Are you ok, Sis?” he asked when eventually he felt her legs loosen and could remove his hand.

Kari’s eyes had rolled into the back of her head and she was only vaguely aware that her brother held her within his embrace. When the bright lights and swirling colours eventually subsided, she felt very weak and hot… too hot. She tilted her head slightly and looked up at Tai through strands of matted orange hair. “Hot,” she said lackadaisically when she could finally utter a word, “too hot.”

Tai gave his sister a soft smile when he saw the glazed look in her eyes. Reaching out a hand, he turned off the shower, before pushing open the door. He had to guide Kari out over the lip and onto the bathroom mat. He grabbed a soft, fluffy towel from the rack and wrapped it around her body. She took hold of the corners from him and now seemed stable enough to stand on her own. Releasing his grip on her, Tai fetched his own towel and began to dry himself.

Kari felt a shiver run up her spine and her skin began to break out into a swarm of goose pimples. Instinctively, she huddled the towel around herself and began to dry. That had been incredible. She had no other words to describe it. Her earlier orgasm it seemed, had just been the warm-up act. She felt sated now, at least in the sexual department. However, she still wanted to cuddle into Tai. And felt extremely grateful that, at least when it concerned her, he was the cuddling sort. Many a time she had heard girls in school complain that their boyfriends didn’t cuddle.

Tai finished drying first and shoved his towel in the laundry hamper while he waited for his sister. When she did, he reached out and wrapped his arms around her shoulders and hugged her from behind. “Have fun?” he whispered playfully in her ear, then gave it an affectionate nibble.

“Hey,” Kari replied in mock indigence, “don’t start something you can’t finish, Brother.”

Tai laughed. “I think after that last round you’re all cummed out.”

Kari tilted her head and smiled at him. “You and me both.” She then slipped out of his embrace and took him by the hand. “Let’s get you some pyjamas, then go to my room.”

“Are you asking me to stay the night?” Tai asked in an amused tone.

“If I could, I’d have you stay every night,” Kari replied, though it wasn’t a joke. More like a not so subtle hint concerning how she felt. Just in case he had somehow failed to pick up on it.

“If only I could,” Tai said with a slight pang of regret.

They exchanged painful glances and Kari led Tai by the hand out of the bathroom and along the hall to his bedroom. Going into his wardrobe, which had become a mess again, she picked out a fresh pair of black pyjama shorts and a pale blue cotton t-shirt. She handed them to him as she did a U-turn out of his room and across the hall to her own. Closing the door behind her, Kari let go of her brother’s hand and went to her own wardrobe. Fishing around inside, she found her green Japanese silk pyjamas and slipped them on.

When his sister let go of his hand, Tai pulled on his shorts and t-shirt. He glanced at the clock on her bedside table; 12:55 pm. Wow, it had gotten late. It had been about three and a half hours since the pizza had arrived. He laughed internally. When he had left his room three and a half hours ago, he would never have imagined that this could happen. An awkward meal and game of Mario Kart had been his expectation. He’d been spot on in that regard. However, what had followed… it blew his mind just thinking about it.

Once she had dressed, Kari crossed over to the bed and pulled back the covers. “Hop in,” she said softly, however, felt slightly on edge. After so long out in the cold, she could not wait to return to her brother’s embrace. In fact, it felt like if she didn’t do it soon, then the opportunity would disappear. And she would not allow that to happen. Tai belonged to her and no one was going to take him away.

Tai climbed onto his sister’s bed and slipped his legs beneath the covers. Rolling onto his side, he pressed his back against the wall to give her as much room as possible. It was only a single bed after all. Kari followed suit and climbed in, pulling the duvet over them once she had settled herself. Their bodies pressed up against one another and Tai draped an arm over her shoulder.

Kari snuggled her head against her brother’s chest and let out a calming breath. This feeling, within Tai’s warm loving embrace, this was the best feeling she had ever experienced. This was her safe space, her home base. The place that, no matter what the world threw at her, she could return to and always feel safe and secure. And Kari knew that she could handle anything, so long as she could come back here at the end of the day. She had made a serious mistake all those weeks ago. Allowed her fears to rule her and dictate her actions. Well not anymore. This was what she wanted and come hell or high water, she would not let it go again.

Tai closed his eyes for a moment and took a series of soothing breaths. Orgasms felt great. Orgasms that involved his sister felt amazing, out of this world even. However, they did not compare with this. Nothing could compare with how he felt in this moment, with Kari snuggled up against his chest. It may not have provided a sexual high, but what it did give him was a feeling of love and warmth that could not be matched by anything. How could he have given this up..? It didn’t matter now. Somehow, through fate, coincidence, or sheer dumb luck, he’d found his way back here. And he knew now that he could not cast it aside again. He and Kari belonged together. It was that simple.

“I love you,” Tai whispered.

“I love you too,” Kari replied. There was a soft silence for a moment as she moved her head so that she could gaze into her brother's pretty chocolate eyes. “So what happens now?”

Tai almost fell into those big, reddish-brown eyes, such was their captivating power. “I think we both know the answer to that. I’m just not sure how we handle it.”

“We stay together,” Kari said softly, “come what may.”

Tai nodded his head. “Come what may.”

Neither sibling knew what the future held. What would happen when the rest of their friends, or indeed their parents, found out about them. However, what they did know was that, no matter what, they were going to be together. The love they shared it seemed, was too strong for them to remain apart.


	63. Pt5 01) Be yourself

** Part Five: A Secret Exposed **

** Chapter One: Be yourself **

A dusting of snow, that had blown through the previous night, still covered the sidewalks and made a satisfying crunching sound underfoot. Wearing thick winter boots, black jeans and her ‘ugly' pink winter coat, Kari Kamiya left the relative quiet of the side-street and weaved her way back onto the main road. A thin smile spread across her lips at the thought of what she might do to the offending article of clothing, once she got home. For never again would it cover her back. In her right hand, she clutched a bag that held its replacement. A dark seaweed green affair with a thick, cream fleeced lining and multiple leather straps and buckles that served as nothing but decoration. At present, fire felt like the way to go. 

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw the figure of her mother sidestep a passerby so she could walk beside her once more. While the schoolyard typically considered it ‘uncool’ to shop with one’s mother well before the age of sixteen, it was something Kari did not mind putting up with and for two very good reasons. First, she was not one to conform to social norms anymore; those days were long gone. And two, her mother had willingly agreed to bankroll this trip. In fact, the whole thing had been her idea in the first place. Apparently, after suffering such heartache (her mother still under the impression she had broken up with her boyfriend), she deserved something to help cheer her up. What the woman did not know, was that she had literally cheered up overnight; the night she and Tai had gotten back together. However, she had not let it go to her head. The morning afterwards, when the ecstasy had ebbed and she had been able to think straight, she’d reminded herself that her relationship with Tai did not define her. That and she could not appear to have miraculously come out of her depression overnight. Instead, over the past week, she had slowly started to appear happier when in the company of her parents. To the point that her mother had announced last night that she was taking her shopping today after school had wrapped up for the winter break. Not only that, but she had even allowed her to go to h.NAOTO. 

In the back of her head, a small voice whispered that this was all too good to be true. That sooner or later, the wheels would come off her wagon and she’d once more be thrown to the dirt. She quickly silenced it. After five weeks of languishing at the bottom of her self-made black hole, she had no intention of sliding back down that slope anytime soon. No, she was happy and planned to stay that way for as long as possible. Moments where she could be alone with Tai would probably come only once a week, she was under no delusion about that. But she would figure out ways to deal with it. Music and the reignited customization of her wardrobe would surely help; she’d gotten a new CD and several bits and bobs for her red vs blue outfit today.

Kari turned to look at her mother, “should we head home?” she asked, conscious of the fact that by this point the woman had spent a not-insignificant amount on her. 

“I’ve one more stop I want to make if you don’t mind being out in the cold a little longer,” the woman replied. 

Even if Kari had minded, she wouldn’t have said so. Not after her mother had just bought her a new coat, jeans, shirt and t-shirt. The only things missing were gloves and shoes, which Kari had bought herself. A white pair of faux leather fingerless gloves and cheap white converse. The former would take dye and the latter paint. Both of which she’d purchased along with spools of thin red and blue ribbon. “Lead on,” she replied as she followed her mother to the left and to a crosswalk. 

A chilly wind started to blow in their faces when they turned to walk up the first street on the left after crossing the main road, resulting in very little being said. Instead, Kari busied herself with figuring out exactly how she was going to create her latest outfit. Every so often her mother had to tug on her sleeve to get her to turn a corner or cross a road. So absorbed in her own thought, she paid no attention to the route they were travelling. A route she had taken only once before, at the end of a different shopping trip. Nor did she even notice the neon sign above the shop door that her mother ushered her through. 

The sound of a youthful, energetic voice that bore a sense of familiarity, drew her out of her musings, “hey, Kari, how’z it hanging?”

She looked around. Four walls, each painted in a different bright colour and a checkerboard floor greeted her. Her eyes then travelled in the direction of the voice and she found herself face to face with, “Teiko!” she said excitedly as she stared into those bright amber eyes. 

Instead of the teal it had been last time they had met, the girl’s hair was now a wicked shade of violet. Before she had a chance to say or do anything else, the girl pounced on her and pulled her into a hug; she returned the gesture. When Teiko let go of her, the girl’s eyes fixed upon her hair. “What a mess, Kari,” she scolded. “You should have come to see me weeks ago, so that, at the very least, I could touch it up.”

“I wasn’t in a very good place until recently,” Kari admitted. “In fact, I almost dyed it brown.” She was not sure why she was telling Teiko the truth, it would have been easy to lie. However, Tai had told her that his friend had that effect on people. Even though they had only met once before, she felt like the sort of person that was really easy to talk to. 

“I see your mom finally got with the program,” the girl nodded her head towards Kari’s mother. “You’re actually quite lucky. It took three times this long for mine to accept that I loved hair dye and punky clothing. Granted, I was only thirteen or so.”

It was only at the mention of her mother, that Kari remembered that it had been her who had brought her in here. She looked at the woman, who gave her a warm smile. “I was perhaps a bit reactionary when it came to your hair all those weeks ago. And since you’ve maintained straight A’s across the board again this term, consider this a well-deserved reward.”

Kari practically threw herself at her mother as she pulled her into a hug. “Thank you,” she breathed through a whirlwind of excitement, “but you don’t have to do this.” 

“You’ve more than earned it, Kari. However, this does not mean I’m going to budge even an inch on the idea of you getting a tattoo or obnoxious body piercing.”

She grinned, “so I can get other piercings so long as they’re not obnoxious?” 

Her mother cast a dark eye over her, “don’t push your luck, young Lady. Now, you had better go and let Teiko do her job. Otherwise, we’ll never get home.” 

Kari paused in her tracks on hearing her mom use the girl’s name. “How did you even know about this place?” 

“I had a little chat with your brother the other week.”

In actuality, she had not needed her mom to answer the question. For the moment she had uttered it, Tai’s name had popped into her head. It had been the only logical explanation. From beside a vacant chair, Teiko beckoned her over. She walked over and sat down. 

“Ok, so, bad news is that you’ve got far too much brown showing for me to simply touch it up. However, on the flip side, since I’ll have to go back to square one anyway, you can have something completely different if you want,” Teiko said with a smile. She indicated her own hair, “case and point.”

Kari had to sit and think about this for a moment. Given her continual spend on CD’s, she had practically resigned herself over the past week to her hair becoming so bad that she would be left with no choice but to dye it brown until she cobbled together the funds to get it coloured again. She stared at herself intently in the mirror. Her hair was just scraping her shoulders now. “Can you make it look like a lit-match again, but leave the length,” she eventually replied. “I think I’d like to try longer hair for a while.”

“You’re the boss,” Teiko said and threw a black styling cape around her with a satisfying swish.

By the time she heard the sound of water being squirted onto her hair, Kari had already chosen to zone out and listen to the first side of Tubular Bells in her head while Teiko worked her magic.

##

It was chilly inside the small single stand, despite the fact that it was relatively full. Having also finished school for the semester, Tai, at the behest of his father, taken time off from his hectic study schedule to go and watch a college soccer game; ironically between Tokyo and Kyoto Universities. Eyes glued to the match, all other thoughts, of school, his university entrance exam and even his girlfriend, had been driven completely from his mind. Yes, at present he was only focused on...

“PENALTY!” Tai roared, as he watched a Kyoto defender chop down one of the Tokyo players inside the box.

He quickly exchanged a glance with his father, who too had shouted out for a spot-kick to be awarded. For the briefest of moments, they shared a smile, only for the game to demand their attention once more as the referee blew his whistle and pointed to the spot.

“Yes!” Tai exclaimed as a crowd of Kyoto players swarmed the referee in protest; it made no difference.

“I thought you would be remaining neutral?” his father said with a chuckle. “You could be playing for Kyoto next season.”

So caught up in the moment, Tai forgot that he had been planning on keeping this decision to himself for now, “even if I get enough to get into Kyoto, I'm still going to go with Tokyo.”

His father did not respond immediately as the penalty taker had placed the ball on the spot and started walking backwards. Tai held his breath. Even though this was not a professional match and neither of these teams one of those he supported, he still felt the same tension. He'd been in that situation himself of course. He waited. Long run-up, pick a corner and hit it hard, he thought to himself; his method for taking a penalty. Oh shit, he's taking a short run-up. The referee blew his whistle, the player ran to the ball, hit it with force and smashed it into the roof of the goal; the keeper had dived to his right. The stand erupted into a loud cheer, with Tai’s voice chief amongst them.

When everyone settled down, his father finally said, “so you’ve decided on Tokyo… strange, I thought you would have leapt at the chance to go to Kyoto if you scored enough on your entrance exam?”

On hearing his father’s words, Tai cursed internally, shit! He’d said on more than one occasion that he would like to go to Kyoto if he got the opportunity. Not only was it the top university in the country, but it also offered a better sports program and had, on most days, the better soccer team. However, Tokyo had one thing that outweighed all of that, Kari. Since they had gotten back together and decided that they wanted a future together, he’d devoted a lot of thought to his choice of university and made the decision that he wanted to remain in the city. That way he could move out and give them a safe haven where they could be alone together. Unfortunately, that meant he needed to come up with an explanation for why he had changed his mind. Something that he’d been unable to do thus far.

With each passing moment potentially making him look more suspicious, Tai came away with the only thing he could think of, “I’m not sure I like the idea of moving somewhere completely new, where I won’t know anyone. Most of my friends will be staying here.” He kept his eyes fixed upon the match as he spoke, not wanting his father to see his face and have the opportunity to call him a liar.

“If that’s what you want to do, Son, then go ahead. However, just make sure your certain before you formally make your choice. You only get to do this once and it needs to be what is right for you.”

“Thanks for the support, Dad,” Tai replied. “However, do you mind keeping it to yourself for now. I don’t want to jinx anything by telling people what I want to do and then for it not to happen.”

His father gave him a grin. “In other words, don’t tell your mother as you don’t want her rattling off facts about why you should go to Kyoto between now and the day you get your test results.”

“Something like that,” he replied, as the crowd let out a collective, “aww,”; one of the Tokyo strikers had just hit the crossbar.

The rest of the match passed by with little more to cheer about. In the end, Tokyo held on for a surprising 2-1 victory. Afterwards, Tai and his father made the short journey to the nearest station and caught the first train back to Odaiba. The subject of his university choice was not revisited, something for which he was very thankful. During the ride home, he made the decision that he should probably tell Kari at the next available opportunity. After all, this was something that would affect both of them and if they were serious about being together long term, they would need to start including each other in important matters such as this one.


	64. Pt5 02) Real love

**Part Five: A Secret Exposed**

**Chapter Two: Real love**

It was Christmas day and while their parent’s focus was firmly on preparing for the hectic New Year's schedule, Tai and Kari had something else planned. Unlike the older generations, theirs had got caught up in Americanization, thus quite enjoyed the non-traditional holiday and everything that came with it. However, instead of celebrating the birth of some foreign religion’s saviour, it was firmly targeted as being a romantic time for couples. And, for some strange reason that neither of the Kamiya siblings understood, strongly associated with KFC. Needless to say, Kari had been quick to put the kibosh on them going there for dinner.

_“I want to go out to a proper restaurant,”_ she had declared a week prior when they had first talked about the subject. Tai had groaned on hearing this. A proper restaurant would mean getting dressed up, not something he relished and add complications when it came to circumventing their parents without raising suspicion. It had come as a firm reminder of two things. One: going out on a date with his sister come girlfriend would always require careful planning and two: Kari had expectations that he would need to meet if he wanted their relationship to continue. Just because he was her brother and they were in love, did not excuse him from meeting the standards she expected of a boyfriend. While she had not explicitly said this, he'd picked up on that message during their first date.

Letting out a long-suffering sigh, Tai tore through his wardrobe, looking for a suitable shirt. Eventually, he found one; it was light blue. Unfortunately, it must have fallen off the hanger at some point as it was more crumpled mess than shirt. It would need to be ironed, only he had no one to do it for him. Damn it, he cursed as he tossed it onto the bed. He then began rummaging around in the bottom for the one and only pair of dress shoes that he owned. Another expletive escaped his lips when he withdrew the half-crushed pair of black shoes; they'd need polished. Picking up the shirt, Tai made his way to the living room, via a trip to the hall cupboard and set up the ironing board. From his sister's room, he could faintly hear The Songs of Distant Earth being played on her CD player. She must have finished in the bathroom he mused, trying to make the shirt fit onto the iron board. Once he was done fixing his shirt and shoes, he would go shower. He picked up the iron.

“Ok,” Tai breathed, “I don't like you and you don't like me, but I swear if you screw me over now, I'll drop you out the window.” It was an empty threat and the stupid household appliance probably knew that, however, it at least made him feel a little better about the situation. It took fifteen minutes of serious elbow grease, along with several rather loud curses and one nearly burnt finger in order to make the shirt look presentable. After that, he set about scrubbing and polishing his shoes, which in comparison, almost felt therapeutic. He returned both items to his bedroom and headed for the shower.

##

The music washed over Kari in much the same way as the water had done in the shower some fifteen minutes ago. Running a comb through her shoulder-length lit-match hair one last time, she turned her head from side to side as she analysed at her reflection in the mirror; perfect. Her gaze fell upon the dress that hung on the open wardrobe door. It was a red skater style affair that she had only worn once before… on her fateful one-year anniversary date with TK. The thing had gotten drenched that night when she had walked home in the rain, laundered, then shoved into her wardrobe. Had she and Tai not planned this date at such short notice, she would probably have shopped for a new one. However, she’d not had that luxury and since the red dress was the nicest one she owned by a country mile, it had won by default.

It’s only a dress, she told herself, as she put on her underwear followed by a pair of black holdups. It was not responsible for what happened that night and so it’s perfectly ok for you to wear. She took it off the hanger and pulled it over her head. The thin straps rested lightly on her shoulders, joining the bodice that covered her small breasts, while the skirt just brushed the tops of her knees. Reaching around her back she awkwardly zipped it up. Sitting down at her desk, she carefully applied some black eyeshadow, mascara and red lipstick that matched her dress. She then painted her nails a similar shade of red. It was rather tame, ordinary even she thought, given the neon yellow she wore with her Digital Punk outfit, or some of the other bright affairs she’d tried out. Indeed, her whole outfit for the evening was a little muted for her tastes now. However, a proper restaurant merited more formal attire. And while she loved her punky wardrobe, she still maintained a level of social etiquette that prevented her from wearing one of her creations to such an establishment.

Squeezing her feet into a pair of red shoes with three-inch heels, she stood up and moved to stand in front of the mirror once more. The outfit, the makeup, everything about her appearance except for her hair was exactly the way it had been just under eighteen months ago. Yet Kari felt polls apart from the girl that had stood in this exact same spot that night. Older, obviously. Wiser, possibly. Happier, yes. More like herself, definitely. She smiled. Gone was that young, emotional wreck of a girl who had stood here and loathed herself for the way she had been too afraid to end a relationship she knew was a sham. Now she looked at herself and saw a young woman who was sure of herself, who she wanted to be and most importantly, who she loved. Yes, there would be difficult times ahead, of that she was in no doubt. But she now felt like someone who could deal with them. However, she did not need to worry about that tonight. No, tonight was going to be fun.

Gracefully, Kari crossed the room to turn off the CD player, before leaving her bedroom. From down the hallway she could hear the sound of the shower, Tai was taking his sweet time tonight it seemed. A quick glance towards the main living area told her why; he’d left the ironing board up. She laughed to herself as she crossed the hall into his bedroom. Hanging on the wardrobe door, she saw the shirt he planned to wear tonight. Well, he certainly gets points for trying, she thought as she whipped it off the hanger, along with the pair of black trousers he’d picked out and took them to the ironing board. In little over five minutes, both were back on their respective hangers and the ironing board back in the closet. She pondered whether or not he’d notice as she sat down on the sofa to wait on him.

They’d caught a slice of luck in that their parents had gone out earlier in the day to do some shopping and then messaged them to say that they too had decided to go out for dinner. While they’d come up with a more than plausible reason for going out together, meeting the other Digidestined for a Christmas night out, it spared any potential questions as to why had they had gotten so dressed up. All they needed to do was come home after their parents had gone to bed, which they would apologise for in the morning and everything would be fine.

##

Tai exited the bathroom and staggered down the hall back to his room, furiously running a towel through his hair as he went. Tossing it to the floor, he located his underwear and pulled it on. His brow furrowed when he caught sight of his perfectly ironed shirt and trousers. Indignance filled him as he slipped it on and buttoned it up; damn Kari. He’d spent fifteen minutes and almost burnt his finger ironing the stupid thing. He pulled on his trousers and couldn’t stop a smile forming on his face. At least his sister had the decency just to gently correct him. Some of his short-lived girlfriends had been the sort to see a mistake about to happen, let you blindly make it and then bitch about the fact you had done so for the rest of the date. Yet another reason why Kari was so special.

Tai finished dressing, made sure he had his wallet and phone, then headed for the main living area. He caught sight of his sister on the couch and she stood up on hearing him approach. When she turned around, his eyes almost popped out of their sockets. She looked incredible. He’d seen her the last time she had worn this outfit and she had looked good then too, but it did not compare to tonight. Then she had been a girl dressed up to appear more like a woman, whereas tonight… tonight she was a woman. Beautiful, elegant, graceful… no words existed to fully capture the sheer incandescent brilliance of his girlfriend.

“How do I look?” she asked with a light smile and flick of her dress.

It took a moment for Tai to be able to utter the only word that came close, “perfect.”

He saw her blush slightly and bite her lip. “You scrub up not too bad yourself.”

“I think Cinderella’s mice got the wrong room tonight and gave me a hand with my outfit instead of you.”

They both laughed at his joke as Kari stepped forward to stand in front of him. He reached out, wrapped an arm around her waist and brought their bodies together. “I love you,” he said softly as he gazed into those captivating reddish-brown orbs.

“I love you too,” Kari replied with all the gentleness of a feather brushing against his skin. She reached up and gave him the lightest of kisses. “We’d better go or we’ll miss the train.”

Tai nodded in agreement and released his grip on her waist. At the front door they pulled on their jackets, the inside pockets of his bulging with the Christmas present he planned on giving her at dinner. Learning from Tk’s mistake, it was not a ring of any variety. Opening the front door, he ushered Kari out and locked it behind him. Before they had even reached the stairs, his hand had found hers and the two had interlocked. He turned his head and met her gaze. Wordlessly, they told each other that they shouldn’t hold hands so close to the apartment. That someone might see them and tell their parents. But at the same time, that they were so madly in love that they did not care what anyone else, including their parents, thought about them. If they were going to be together then sooner or later the world would have to find out and learn to deal with it.

##

They took the train from Odaiba to Minato city and got off at Shiodome station, just as they had done on their ill-fated first date. Only this evening, everything had felt different. Hand in hand, they’d brazenly walked through the streets of Odaiba without a care. Neither of them nervously glancing around to see if anyone they knew had seen them. Instead, they’d shared light-hearted conversation, jokes and playful teasing. On the train, they had sat together and gazed out at the beautiful sight of Tokyo bay at sunset as they’d crossed the Rainbow bridge. So relaxed in each other’s company.

When they had disembarked and managed to make their way out of the hectic station, Kari had taken Tai by surprise when she had told him that she needed to go pick something up and would meet him outside the restaurant in an hour’s time. He had felt slightly put out by this, but his girlfriend had assured him that the surprise would make up for the time he would need to spend alone. With a parting kiss, Kari had disappeared off into the crowd.

Tai lazily strolled through the busy streets, stopping to look at some of the festive stalls that had popped up for the season, as he killed the time until he was due to meet back up with his girlfriend. In hindsight, he should have queried why she’d wanted to take the earlier train when they had planned the date. At a flower stall, he bought her a singular red rose, cheesy he knew, but a gesture she would appreciate nonetheless. Further along, he went into a sweet shop and filled a box full of her favourite types of gummy sweeties. While it did not look nearly as glamorous as a box of fancy chocolates, Kari would much prefer it. TK had never picked up on the fact that his sister was not a huge chocolate lover and had bought her increasingly expensive assortments for their one-month and six-month anniversaries plus her birthday. She never did have the heart to tell the boy that she’d passed them on to their mom. Finally, he picked up a gift bag in a card shop and deposited her present, the sweets and rose inside.

Glancing at his watch, Tai altered his course and began heading for the restaurant. Wanting to experience an authentic Christmas dinner, they’d settled on a British establishment that promised to serve just that. It was a small place and it had only been by virtue of a cancellation that they had managed to get a table. In fact, so quaint was the sign above its door, that Tai walked right passed it and had to double back when he reached the end of the road. He waited. About five minutes later, he caught sight of a flash of bright orange amidst the sea of natural hair colours; Kari.

##

“Miss me?” Kari said with a cute smile, as she reached up and pecked her boyfriend on the lips. She had a small gift bag clutched in her hands.

“Whenever you’re not with me,” Tai replied truthfully.

She gave him a sceptical look. “Really? You never think to yourself, thank fuck that annoying, needy girlfriend of mine isn’t here so I can get some peace and quiet?”

Tai opened his mouth to immediately say, of course not, but stopped. He gave her a grin. “I suppose… sometimes. However, when that happens, I go see my sister. She’s really good at listening to me when I need to bitch about my girlfriend and all the times she harps on at me about being a sucky boyfriend.”

Kari burst out laughing and had to take a moment to compose herself. When she eventually did, she said, “your sister must be rather special, if she can put up with all the bitching you do. However, I’m sure that when you’re being a douche,” she deftly gave him a playful punch in the arm, “she knows how to handle you.”

They both laughed and Tai held out his arm, “shall we?”

Kari took it, “lets.”

Arm in arm the couple descended the flight of stairs beneath the quaint sign and entered the restaurant. As expected, it was not large inside the building. However, by no means did it feel cramped. The round tables were well spaced out and adorned with white tablecloths and festive red and gold runners. Each was lit by a small candle and the ceiling lighting kept to a minimum. Resulting in a warm glow permeating throughout the room. And only a low level of chatter could be heard. Like there was an unspoken agreement between the patrons to be extra polite. A maitre d’ greeted them warmly at the front of house lectern, asked Tai for his name, hung their jackets on the coat rack and then led them over to a table in the corner.

As she walked past the other diners, Kari noticed two things, one: virtually all of them appeared to be couples and two: she and Tai were almost certainly the youngest. The maitre d’ carefully pulled her chair out from beneath the table and invited her to sit. Naturally, she obliged. When both she and her boyfriend were seated, the man handed them menu’s and took their drinks order; a melon soda for her and a grape one for Tai.

“It feels so nice in here, don’t you think?” Kari said after the maitre d’ had left.

“KFC might have been nice too,” Tai chuckled.

She shook her head in mock disdain. “You’d eat just about anything if your stomach was remotely hungry.”

“Not quite anything…”

“…anything but one of mom’s kitchen nightmares.”

They both let out a low chuckle, choosing to respect the rooms seemingly unspoken rule.

Tai reached into his gift bag, pulled out the singular red rose. “I bought this for you,” he said as he held it out to her. “I’ve no idea where you’re supposed to put it,” he then laughed.

Kari felt a warm sense of love at her boyfriend’s slight awkwardness as she reached out her slender hands and took the flower. Bringing it up to her nose, she took a deep breath in through her nostrils and allowed the sweet aroma to wash over her. “It’s beautiful,” she replied and sat it gently down on the table. “I’ll put it in some water when I get home, then press it when it eventually dries out.”

“I also got you this.” Tai held out the gift bag for her to take. “It’s not much, but I hope you like it.”

“If it’s from you, I’m sure I will.” Kari took the bag and peered inside. It contained a mixed box of sweeties that she knew Tai had picked himself along with two CD’s (Pink Floyd’s A Momentary Lapse of Reason and Mike Oldfield’s Tubular Bells III) and a studded black choker with silver chains dangling from it. It seemed her boyfriend had braved h.NAOTO for her. She felt an overwhelming sense of gratitude; the gift was perfect. “Tai, thank you so much!”

“Don’t mention it,” Tai smiled. Unlike with his previous girlfriends, there had been no feelings of doubt or worry about whether or not Kari would like the gift, either when buying it or giving it to her. He instinctively knew what would make her happy.

Kari sat the gift bag under the table, then picked up the small one she herself had brought. She had been extremely lucky to get it made in time, owing to the unique nature of the design, hence why it had not been ready until today. “Here,” she said, offering the bag to him, “I really hope you like it.” Internally she had her fingers crossed, for the gift was not quite in keeping with his normal style.

Tai could see a slight look of concern in his girlfriend’s eyes as he took the bag from her. Whatever was inside, she had clearly gone out on a limb when choosing it and was worried he wouldn’t like it. He opened it and withdrew something covered in tissue paper. Unwrapping it, he discovered a black leather wrist cuff.

“Turn it over,” Kari encouraged.

He did so and saw embossed in the leather and painted orange, the crest of courage. “Wow… Kari,” he breathed, slightly stunned. He could tell from the feel of it that the leather was genuine. Add to that the cost of having something that unique stamped into it and it must have cost her at least ¥7000, maybe more.

“I know you’ve been wearing a sweatband because you have still have issues looking at your wrist. So, I thought if you wore this instead, every time you look at it, you’ll be reminded of how strong you actually are,” Kari explained. “I really hope you like it.”

Tai traced the pattern of his crest with his finger. “Kari... it's amazing. Thank you so much.”

“I’m so glad you like it,” Kari replied, a slight air of relief about her tone.

He put the wrist cuff back in the bag and sat it under the table, just as a waiter arrived with their drinks. They sat and talked for a while as they perused the festive menu. In the end, they both stuck to the original plan and ordered the traditional Christmas Dinner. Which consisted of carrot and coriander soup to start, followed by turkey with ‘all the trimmings’ whatever that meant and sherry trifle for dessert; neither of them liking the sound of Christmas pudding.

They both enjoyed the first two courses and it was while they were waiting for dessert that Tai decided it was time to talk to Kari about his plans for after school. “I’ve been thinking this past week and I’ve decided that, if I get enough on my university entrance exam, I’m going to go to Tokyo U,” he said.

Kari looked up at her boyfriend. She supposed this was a conversation most couples had when it came time for one or both of them to finish high school. At that point, you were free to go off into the wild and try and find your own path. For some couples, it would be heartbreak, as a drive towards future success proved stronger than teenage love. While others might sacrifice golden opportunities on the chance their love was real. In their case, Tai was willing to make the sacrifice; albeit nowhere near the scale that some people undoubtedly did. Tokyo U was still second best in the country and with a great sports program, even if not quite at the level of Kyoto’s. Kari met his gaze and couldn’t keep the smile from her face. This was supposed to be the point where she told him not to sacrifice anything for her and go off to Kyoto. Only she could not. She’d already lost him once and could not bear the thought of him being almost five-hundred-kilometres away. Selfish, yes, but in this instance, it did not matter. For she already knew Tai had made up his mind.

“I know I’m supposed to tell you not to make a choice based on me, but the idea of you going to Kyoto does not bear thinking about.”

Tai laughed, slightly surprised that his girlfriend had openly displayed such selfishness. “Who said it had anything to do with you?” he joked. “My bed and I have far too much history for me to just walk out on it.”

“If you’re so involved with it, then maybe I should leave the two of you alone permanently,” Kari replied with an evil grin. “Still, you can always find solace in mom’s cooking.”

They both laughed, however, held back on further commentary regarding their shared parentage as the waiter approached with their trifles. Only when he was out of earshot did Kari then voice something that she’d been pondering ever since they’d gotten back together. “Tai,” she began, her voice low and slightly trepid, “I’ve been thinking about our secret and how inevitably mom and dad will find out.”

Tai glanced at her, his mouth full of cream and custard, indicating with his hand for her to continue. However, he had a feeling he was not going like what she had to say on the matter.

Kari took a deep breath before she said, “we’ve been living under the assumption that sooner or later, mom and dad will figure out what’s going on or someone else will tell them… then all hell breaks loose.” She paused for a moment, before adding, “instead, what if we tell them?”

Tai almost choked on his mouthful of trifle. Awkwardly swallowing, he stared at his girlfriend in horror, like she had gone insane and, struggling to keep his voice low, said, “what! Kari, have you gone completely mental?”

Kari had been prepared for this response and did not begrudge Tai for having thought her mad. Given that, on the surface, her suggestion sounded akin to putting the hangman’s noose around their necks themselves. She chuckled lightly, even though it was no laughing matter, before launching into her explanation, “I know it sounds crazy, but hear me out.”

Tai took a drink of his soda, then cautiously said, “ok.”

“Mom and Dad will find out eventually, agreed?”

He nodded.

“So, isn’t it better that they hear it directly from us, rather than finding out secondhand or piecing it together themselves? It also gives us a measure of control over the situation. I think I’d rather sit them down and explain things to them as calmly as we can, than have them suddenly burst into the apartment and start yelling at us.”

Tai listened carefully and tried to digest his girlfriend’s argument. Now that he heard it, in some strange and downright crazy fashion, it actually made sense. If their parents were going to find out eventually, maybe taking control of the where and when was the best idea. They would be absolutely furious about it, regardless of how they found out, but maybe doing it Kari’s way would make the whole thing slightly easier. At least they would be prepared for the onslaught, rather than having it sprung on them. He shook his head in resignation, a grimace of a smile forming on his lips. “I think you might be right. Facing them on our terms, together, would be preferable to coming home one day and having them waiting to scream at us.”

Kari gave him a faint smile and counted herself fortunate that Tai always managed to put his rational head on when listening to her suggestions. Yet part of her wished he had been opposed to the idea. For him agreeing with her led to the inevitable question of, “so when do we tell them?”

Tai felt a tiny bubble of panic rise up from his stomach. He had been afraid she would ask this. Unfortunately, he knew that there would never be a good time. Instead, it would be a case of finding a time that was the least bad. He remained silent for a few moments before eventually saying, “definitely sometime after my entrance exam. I don’t like the idea of mom being a permanent state of nuclear in the run-up to it.”

“Agreed,” Kari replied. “That would be the absolute worst thing for you to face when you need to be focused on your studies. How about we wait until after you get your results and formally make your choice to go to Tokyo U in the spring?”

Tai sighed, “I think it might be best to wait until after I’ve moved out. Although, personally, I’d rather wait until you were ready to move out too. But three years is a long time for us to try and keep this hidden.”

“Worst case scenario, I might have too. However, I’d rather not speculate on what mom and dad may or may not try to do,” Kari said, trying to divert her mind from the topic with a mouthful of her dessert; delicious.

“Yeah, let’s talk about something else now. I don’t want this hanging over us for the rest of the night.”

They did just that as they finished their desserts and were soon debating the merits of Akira being remade as an anime series, rather than a feature film. Tai taking the stance that the film was an iconic piece of art and should be left alone and Kari, who’d read the manga, arguing that the story deserved to be told in its entirety, rather than just what they’d managed to cram into two hours. When they finally agreed to disagree, Tai asked for the bill. They had just stepped outside and climbed back up to street level when he felt his phone vibrate. Withdrawing it from his pocket, he read the message, _“we’ve just finished dinner and are going for a couple of drinks. Don’t wait up when you get in.”_

Tai pocketed his phone and smiled at his girlfriend. “It seems we’ll either need to stay out really late in order to get home after mom and dad are asleep, or we can go home to an empty apartment.”

Kari gave him a devilish smile as she said, “empty apartment.” She then drew in close to him and whispered seductively in his ear, “I can’t think of a better night than tonight.”

“Are you sure?” Tai asked. A single glance into her eyes told him all he needed to know. “We’d better stop off at a store before we go home then.”

Kari nodded, took his hand and together the couple set off down the street.


	65. Pt5 03) Virgins of the world

**Part Five: A Secret Exposed**

**Chapter Three: Virgins of the world**

Tai and Kari almost burst through the apartment door when they finally made it home. All the lights were off in the main living area and neither bothered to turn any of them on. While they had almost run back to the train station from the restaurant (they probably would actually have run had Kari not been wearing heels), the train ride to Odaiba had felt agonisingly slow. Each minute spent on the journey was one less they had alone in the empty apartment. They'd made a brief stop off at a store to pick up a packet of condoms and a bottle of lube, then hurried along on the last leg of their trip.

Making a b-line straight for Kari’s bedroom, the couple had already wrapped themselves in each other’s arms by the time they staggered over the threshold; Tai’s foot closing the door behind them. Their lips met in a passionate kiss as shoes were haphazardly kicked off. In an explosion of primal desire, they tore one another’s clothes off until Tai was left only in his socks and Kari her holdups.

Grabbing his girlfriend around the waist, Tai pressed her slender frame against his own. The sensation of her soft skin against his own was electrifying and served as the final jolt of stimulation required to get him fully hard. Guiding her over to the bed, he was about to lower her down, when in a flash, she spun him around and pushed him backwards. He fell towards the mattress as his eyes caught sight of the evil grin on her face. Before he even landed, she was bearing down on top of him.

Kari descended onto her boyfriend and found his lips with a furious kiss. Her tongue slipped into his mouth and she could taste the sherry-soaked fruit from his dessert as she explored every corner. She felt his hands, strong and firm, begin to rub her shoulders and she let out a moan of contentment. Her own began to snake their way down his muscular torso, giving his nipples a light flick on the way past.

Tai groaned when he felt her rub her body against his own, feeling her already damp crotch touch against his penis. His hands reached down and clenched her tight ass cheeks as he rocked her back and forth. He’d never felt more turned on in his life. Hands sliding from her ass and over her waist, he cupped her breasts lightly as he began to gently massage them.

A shudder of pleasure ran down Kari’s spine when she felt fingers caress the soft flesh of her mounds. She let out a moan and in doing so, allowed her brother to take control of the kiss. Lightly she bucked her hips, feeling her boyfriend’s solid penis between them. She’d fantasised for months about what it would feel like to have him inside her. For their bodies to combine as one in this most intimate of acts. The moment when she would finally find out was not far away.

Tai felt Kari break off their kiss and slide her body down his and then watched as she sensually brought herself up onto her knees. Her bright lit-match hair framed her face and she looked absolutely divine in the glow of the moonlight that shone through the window. Like a shining goddess, smouldering with passion… or a fiery demon, burning with desire. It did not matter which, he wanted them both.

Taking a much-needed breath, Kari reached over onto the bedside table, where somehow the box of condoms and bottle of lube had found themselves, ripped the former open and withdrew one. She looked down at her boyfriend and grinned. They’d agreed on the way home that it would be best for him to take control when it came time for actual penetration. However, until then she decided, this was her show. She turned around and straddled his chest. With a touch like a feather, she ran the fingers of her right hand up Tai’s long shaft; it quivered.

With his girlfriend now atop his chest, Tai could only work with whatever was within the immediate reach of his hands. It was fortunate then, that he had rather long arms. Snaking his fingers up and around her sides, he found her breasts and began to pinch at her nipples. They immediately stiffened to a yelp of delight. “Urgh!” Kari moaned as he gripped both of her breasts in firm hands. As always, this brought a smile to his face. It was always a pleasure to hear her enjoy herself.

Under the influence of continual jolts of ecstasy, Kari almost lost control. Her body virtually turning to putty in her boyfriend’s skilled hands. He could sculpt her any which way he desired if it felt this good. Through a rose-coloured haze that fogged her mind, she somehow managed to resist descending into a chasm of pure bliss and submitting herself to his whims. Her hand found his penis once more and she began to stroke it up and down. She felt his hold on her breasts release as he let out a loud moan.

At the feel of his girlfriend’s firm grip on his shaft, Tai momentarily drowned in the wonderful nature of the sensation. The next time he was aware, Kari had shifted her ass backwards and lowered her back. Dangling above his face, he could see her dripping wet pussy. Like lightning had just shot up his spine, he felt her tongue run its way from the base of his shaft up to the tip. “AHHH!” he cried out when she began circling his tip, before taking it inside her warm mouth.

Kari slowly descended down atop her boyfriend’s penis, only to let out a muffled gasp, as she felt his tongue poke between her labia and start to lick. Holy crap that felt good. She fought against the waves of pleasure to continue her own licking as Tai found her clit. For a minute or two, stifled moans filled the air as they sucked one another. In the end, she just managed to cobble together enough restraint to stop. Having to physically shuffle her pussy out with his reach. Tearing open the condom, she pinched the tip, placed it over the head of his penis and rolled it down in one fluid motion. She turned to face him.

“Ready,” Kari asked through a panted breath.

“Ready,” Tai nodded in response.

Their lips met in a passionate kiss as their arms wrapped around their already sweaty bodies. Taking control, Tai turned them around and lay his girlfriend down atop the bed. He stretched out a hand and picked up the bottle of lube. Popping the cap, he squeezed some into his hand and proceeded to first rub it all around his shaft and then around her opening. He slipped a finger inside, causing her to squeal.

“Hey, no fair!” Kari pouted, fighting back a moan.

“Just making sure you’re open for business,” Tai grinned back. When she spread her legs wide, he slid a second inside and gently fingerbanged her for a few moments. “This might hurt,” he said as gently as one could when telling someone you might be about to cause them a lot of pain.

“I know,” Kari replied. “Just don’t stop because let I out the smallest of cries, ok. I’ll tell you if I need you to stop.”

“Ok,” Tai nodded, having to beat back the ever-shrinking part of him that was her overprotective big brother. He was her boyfriend first and foremost now. If he were to slip back into old habits now, she would probably lose her shit at him. She’d made that quite clear the last time he had done so.

“Good. Now, shut up and kiss me.”

Kari pulled Tai down atop her and their lips met. As their tongues danced with each other, Tai guided himself into position. For both of them, this was it. There would be no going back after this. For Kari, this was the culmination of a long and arduous journey that had started over two years ago. And for Tai, the ultimate realisation that he had found in his sister, everything that, for the longest time, he had never realised that he wanted.

As gently as he could, Tai slid his penis inside Kari’s vagina.

Kari winced at the hot flash of pain that flooded her from her vagina. Involuntarily, her muscles tensed, her eyes screwed up and all she could do to stop herself from yelling at Tai to take it out was to dig her fingernails into his shoulders. For a moment she writhed in agony, unable to tell if her boyfriend was thrusting in or out. And just when she thought she could take it no more, the crimson mist that enveloped her mind slowly began to recede.

Tai’s eyes were glued upon the look of agony that had smeared itself across his girlfriend’s face from the moment he had entered her. For a split second, his resolve wavered and he almost pulled himself out. Only the promise that he had made to her moment’s prior stayed his penis. Trying to be gentle, he pulled back and began to slowly thrust. He let out a wince of his own when he felt her nails lodge themselves in his shoulders. And even though he was sure one or two had broken through the skin, he knew the mild pain he felt did not compare with what Kari was experiencing. With difficulty, he began to work up a light rhythm, his soul torn in two. However, the longer he stared at her screwed-up features, the more she became his little sister. His resolve was mere seconds away from breaking when her eyes opened and she let out a moan, not of pain, but of pleasure.

Kari gazed into her boyfriend’s chocolate eyes. She could see the conflict that brewed inside him. The fight between the two halves of his personality. Sometimes it was easy for her to forget that, compared to her, he only had a few months experience of feeling the love shared between lovers, rather than that between siblings. That, while she had easily been able to view him as boyfriend over brother, it had not been so simple for him. Time to remind him. Pulling her nails out of his shoulders, Kari grabbed the back of Tai’s head and pulled him into a passionate kiss, as inside she felt pleasure wash away the pain.

For the first time, Tai became fully aware of the warmth of his girlfriend’s tight walls around his penis. Internally, torment turned to relief and then quickly to desire as he felt the first flutter of pleasure. Urged on by Kari’s moans, he began to thrust deeper. When he finally pushed his penis in all the way, she shrieked in delight and wrapped her legs around his lower back. Harder and faster he pumped, a stream of grunts and moans escaping his own mouth. This was like nothing he had ever experienced before.

Bodies colliding together, Tai and Kari could feel orgasms building quickly and after a few more thrusts, the couple screamed each other’s names as pleasure exploded through them. Their bodies collectively tensed in sheer bliss for several moments before they flopped against the mattress. Panting for breath, neither was able to utter a word for several minutes.

That was until Kari managed to say, “Tai… get your heavy, sweaty butt off of me.”

The sound of his girlfriend’s voice jolted Tai back to reality; he’d almost dozed off. His eyes re-engaged and he could see the expression of mock irritation on her face. He gave her a dumb look.

“Tai, get off!” she reiterated, playfully shoving at his shoulders. “I can’t get a proper breath with your dead weight crushing me.”

“Oh,” Tai replied, but still didn’t move. “For a moment there I thought you were mad at me.”

“I’ll get mad at you if you don’t move your heavy butt.”

Tai hastily rolled against the wall as he apologised, “sorry, Kari.”

Kari gratefully swallowed a few unrestricted breaths before she next spoke. “That was… intense.”

He looked her in the eyes. “Yeah,” he said and wrapped an arm around her.

She ran a hand over his muscular chest, “how did that feel?”

“Amazing,” Tai replied. He then gave her a look of concern, “are you…”

Kari cut him off with a firm look, “I hope you’re asking that as my boyfriend.” She made him sweat for a moment or two, before giving him a smile. “It hurt like fuck at first, but once the pain subsided, it felt really good.”

Tai felt a slight pang of guilt but did not let it show. In a way, this situation was probably good for him. If they were going to be together long term, he would need to cut loose the big brother part of him. They were a couple, boyfriend and girlfriend.

“Tai?”

“Yeah?”

“Stay with me awhile.”

Even though their parents would be home in an hour or two, he could not say no to her. Reaching down, he pulled off the condom. Tying a knot in it, he tossed it onto Kari’s nightstand. Lying down beside her, he pulled the duvet over them.

They cuddled together under the blankets, eyes closed, enjoying the warmth of being within each other’s embrace. They fell asleep within half an hour. 


	66. Pt5 04) After the ordeal

**Part Five: A Secret Exposed**

**Chapter Four: After the ordeal**

Kari rolled over in her state of semi-consciousness, snuggling herself against the muscular torso of her boyfriend. His arm wrapped itself around her. There was nowhere in either this world or the digital one that she would rather be right now. Within Tai’s embrace, she felt safe and content. She brought her hand up and intertwined her fingers with his. It was heart-breaking to think that soon they must part. However, their parents could be home any minute now and… Kari’s brain suddenly woke up and realised that she had been asleep. Her eyes snapped open and found the green digits of her alarm clock; 9:03 am.

“Shit!” she exclaimed, struggling to keep her voice down. Frantically, she turned around. “Tai, wake up!” she hissed, giving him an unceremonious shove. There was no time to try and wake him nicely.

Tai raised his head up from the pillow and struggled to open his eyes. “Wah?” he uttered groggily, completely oblivious to the situation.

“Damn it, Tai,” Kari cursed, “we don’t have time for your cute clueless morning routine.” Between her thumb and forefinger, she grabbed one of his nipples and twisted.

“Ow…mmph!” he yelled, but swiftly found a hand over his mouth. “Wha te ‘ell, ‘ari!”

“Keep, your voice down,” she hissed firmly, lowering her hand from her boyfriend’s mouth. “Tai, we fell asleep last night and now it’s morning.”

“Shit,” he replied in a low voice, feeling a large bubble of panic rise up from his stomach and burst. “What do we do?”

“Well, since we didn’t get woken up in the middle of the night by screaming parents, I think it’s safe to assume that neither mom nor dad decided to check in on us when they got home.”

Tai nodded in agreement, that seemed like a safe assumption. However, it still left them with the question of, “so what do we do?”

“Either hope that no one is awake yet, or get you into your room without anyone noticing.”

Tai looked at the clock. “I like plan A, but suspect that we’ll need to run with plan B.”

“Probably. Let me put on some pyjama’s and then I’ll go see if anyone’s awake,” Kari said as she disentangled herself from the covers and sat up. When she stood up, she felt a slight stab of pain from inside her vagina. She winced. Well, that shouldn’t have come as a surprise. Between her legs felt slightly sticky and a quick glance revealed a slight smearing of blood on her inner thighs. That probably meant she’d need to change the bedsheets and launder them before her mom had that chance to notice. She found her pyjamas and slipped them on.

Tai followed suit, got out of his sister’s bed and found his boxers amidst their discarded clothing. Given that he couldn’t be seen leaving her room, he’d be dead either way. However, if that were to happen, he’d rather go out with a shred of modesty. He pulled them on. Suppressing a fear he had not felt since Etamon’s electric fences, he joined his sister at the door.

“Ok, I’ll head out and see if the coast is clear. If it’s not, I’ll try and distract mom and/or dad until you can make it to your room. However, you might have to sit tight for a bit.” Kari looked him up and down and couldn’t help but smile. “You know, there’s something quite delicious about you when your all nervous and clad only in your undies.”

Tai gave her a sour look. “This is not the time for you to leer at me.”

Kari flashed him a wicked grin as she opened the door and slipped out. In the hallway, she could hear the sound of running water coming from the bathroom, meaning that their parents were definitely awake, but that one of them was safely out of the way… for now. Heading into the main living area, she located her mother in the kitchen. Unable to offer Tai any sort of signal, she did the only thing she could think of, “morning, Mom,” she greeted, hoping it was enough to indicate that the coast was clear.

Tai too could hear the sound of the shower coming from the bathroom. Sneaking a glance after his sister, he observed her stop in front of the kitchen and greet their mom. The woman’s reply told him that she was in the kitchen. He was about to make a break for it when he caught sight of her head for the dining table. Hastily he pulled his head back inside.

“How was your night out,” Kari asked, internally cursing the fact that the woman had chosen that precise moment to go and put a pot of coffee on the table.

“A few drinks too long,” her mom replied with a half-smile and poured herself a mug of coffee. “This is the first time I’ve had any sort of hangover in….” she trailed off as she tried to recall.

“Did you at least have a good time?” Kari quizzed, skilfully taking the opportunity to shepherd her mom into the chair facing away from the hallway.

Her mom laughed as she sipped her coffee, “too good. Life lesson, Kari, always know when to call it a night.”

“Sounds easier said than done.”

Back in his sister’s bedroom, Tai risked another glance down the hallway towards the main living area. Perfect, he thought as he watched Kari guide their mom into the chair. Creeping out into the hallway, he closed the bedroom door as quietly as he could, blissfully unaware that the shower had stopped. Taking care not to step on the squeaky board he tiptoed down the hall. Suddenly, he heard the sound of a doorknob rattling. He froze, eyes darting towards the bathroom. Shit! He only had one choice and would have to just run the risk of his mom turning around at the sound of his footsteps. He darted towards the bathroom door, pulling up just in front of it as his father opened it.

The man jumped, “bloody hell, Tai!”

“Sorry, Dad, but I really need the loo.” He stepped out of his father’s way and quickly darted around him the moment he had cleared the doorway; just for effect.

From the dining table, Kari had to stifle a laugh, having seen the whole thing. However, there was an overriding feeling of relief that she and Tai had gotten away with such a major screw up. There was a lesson to be learned here. They would have to be far more careful in future.


	67. Pt5 05) Talk

**Part Five: A Secret Exposed**

**Chapter Five: Talk**

The rest of the winter break had evaporated and the days since school resumed had been slipping by and blurring into one, as the date of Tai’s university entrance exam drew nearer. Each new day had followed the same pattern as the one that preceded it. Wake up, load up on caffeine, study all day with the occasional break for food and more caffeine, then go to bed. Subtleties, such as whether he was in school or his bedroom, were virtually irrelevant. Today was one of those where he’d been required to go to school.

Robotically, when the chime to signal the start of morning break sounded, he packed away his things, rose from his chair and filled towards the exit. As did every other member of the class. Their collective behaviour was almost synchronous. 

“Tai,” a voice said softly from beside him; Sora.

“Hey,” he replied as they filled out of the room into the busy corridor.

“How are you holding up?” she asked as she gave him a smile.

“I don’t even know what day it is anymore?” he said as he involuntarily yawned. “The only reason I know it’s a school day is because I see Kari dressed in her uniform at breakfast.” He let out a light chuckle. “If she figures out that’s how I’m telling my days apart, she’ll probably wear it on a Saturday and quietly giggle to herself as I head off for school.”

Sora let out a laugh, but it sounded forced. The joke hadn’t been that bad, had it? Or was she, like everyone else, so ground down by the constant studying that she’d forgotten what humour was? Either way, she quickly moved the subject on. “Are you getting much sleep? I know I’m not.”

Another yawn escaped his mouth and conveniently served as an answer. The girl’s light laughter sounded genuine this time. They walked to one of the social areas and sat down. Tai reached into his bag and pulled out an energy drink and a large bar of chocolate. He’d been chugging the former at a ridiculous rate recently. In fact, they were probably the only thing keeping him going. The latter he had found lurking in the kitchen cupboard on the discovery that he was out of energy bars. The call of the empty calories had been too much for him to resist, so he’d taken it instead. He caught sight of Sora’s gaze linger on the chocolate bar. Given the current state of affairs with her mother and the fact she was saving every last yen, he had a sneaking suspicion that she’d been deprived of all comfort foods since he’d taken her to that burger bar; that had been well over a month ago. Sighing internally, Tai broke the bar in two and offered half of it to her. He watched Sora’s gaze linger on it and could see the conflict between her manners telling her to politely decline and her desire to gobble it up.

Tai gave her a warm smile. “Take it,” he said with a light chuckle.

Hesitantly, Sora reached out a hand. It hovered mid-air for a moment, before deftly plucking the piece of chocolate from his grasp. He watched in amusement as the girl broke off a piece, put it in her mouth, then closed her eyes and savoured it.

“Oh my god, I’ve missed chocolate so much,” she said after finally swallowing.

“You must really be serious about Kyoto if you’ve given it up completely.” It was only then, when he mentioned her desire to go to Kyoto, that Tai recalled the proposition she had made when they had been in the burger bar… going to Kyoto together as friends or perhaps, in time if needs be, a couple. Even though he was in love with Kari and had made his choice so he could be with her, he could not help but feel a slight sadness that he would need to turn down Sora’s offer. Perhaps in another life, where he had not fallen in love with his sister or the girl had chosen him over Matt, he would have readily accepted it. But not in this one. And he would need to tell her so, sooner or later.

Sora nodded her head, “mhmm. I’m counting down the days until I start work at the Ai-Mart with almost the same level of importance as those until the exam. I’ll be working two nights during the week and all day on Saturdays and Sundays until we finish school. After that, I should hopefully be able to work full time until I’m ready to go to Kyoto… assuming I get what I need on the entrance exam.”

“You will,” Tai said firmly as he opened the energy drink and took a sip. “You’re studying harder than anyone for that test.” He held the can out to her.

She gave him a small smile as she took it from him. “What about you,” she asked, then took a mouthful from the can. “Assuming you get over seventy-five, what are you going to do? Have you made a decision yet?”

As Sora spoke, Tai quickly took a bite out of his chocolate. He could see the mix of anticipation, desire and trepidation in her red eyes. She was desperate to hear him say that he was going to Kyoto. That they could go together as friends… or more. And part of him wished that he could tell her what she wanted to hear. Only that ship had sailed the night he and Kari had gotten back together. As much as he liked her as a friend, or perhaps even loved her, he could not fulfil her wish. He was in love with Kari and Kari would be here in Tokyo.

“I’m sorry, Sora,” he said softly. “No matter what the result of my entrance test, I’m staying in Tokyo.”

The moment the words left his mouth, he saw the girl’s face fall. The anticipation and desire vanished from her eyes, replaced by sorrow and longing. “But Kyoto has a better sports program and soccer team. Not to mention it’s the best university in the country at present,” she said in disbelief. “Wouldn’t it be the better choice for your career, if you scored enough on the test?”

Tai sighed. So, she’d looked into the sports program and the soccer team. Bang went any chance of him lying to her about Tokyo being better for him. He could try pedalling the same lie to her that he’d told his father, but she’d see straight through that. He’d have to tell her the truth. “My girlfriend and I had a long conversation before the new year and we decided that we want to be together, so are both going to stay in Tokyo.”

The sorrow in Sora’s eyes intensified slightly and they darkened slightly as her lips thinned. “I understand,” she said softly, though he could hear a slight hint of resentment. “She must be really special if you’re basing your future on being with her.”

“She is,” he affirmed.

Sora said nothing as she finished her chocolate, took another quick drink from the can and passed it back to him. “Thank you for the chocolate and energy boost,” she said politely.

He took the can back and watched her stand up. “I’m sorry, Sora,” was all he could say.

“I’m sorry too,” she replied, her tone laced with sorrow and regret. She walked away.

Tai’s gaze followed the ginger-haired girl as she disappeared into the crowd. He couldn’t help but feel sorry for her. After her breakup with Matt, she must have pinned a lot of hope on him accepting her offer. Indeed, he was certain that she now desperately wished she could go back in time and change the choice she made eighteen months ago. He ate the rest of his chocolate and drank the last of the energy drink in silence. When the chime to signal the end of morning break sounded, Tai, like all the others trudged back to the grindstone.

##

The school day had lapsed and had reached that grey area between late afternoon and early evening. Inside Odaiba Middle School, Kari Kamiya sat at a study table. Across from her, separated by a Berlin wall-esque stack of cold war textbooks, was Yolei. Up to this point, it had very much been an all work and no play sort of study session. Their cold war report proving to be somewhat challenging.

Absentmindedly, Kari started to hum the tune of Pink Floyd’s Us and Them. Her subconscious clearly deciding that a song about war and human conflict served as a perfect soundtrack. Indeed, she wasn’t really aware that she’d been doing it, until Yolei commented, “you seem awfully cheerful today.”

Kari looked over the top of ‘the wall’, “am I?” she asked in amusement. She’d not told Yolei about having gotten back together with Tai, owing to the agreement she had with him about not telling anyone. However, none was the condition on her confirming it should her best friend figure it out. And Kari had been intrigued as to how long it would take her.

The lavender-haired girl gave her a speculative look. “You only hum when you’re happy,” she paused and Kari could see the gears turning inside her head. “In fact, you’ve been humming a lot recently. Come to think of it, you’ve been in a rather good mood all week.”

Kari laughed, “me? The depressed girl who can’t get over having broken up with her boyfriend. In a good mood? The world must really have gone to hell if my mood is to be considered good.”

“You’re not going to weasel your way out of this one, Kari. You’ve been far too happy of late for a depressed girl. Which means you’ve finally gotten over your breakup, or…”

A thin smile danced on Kari’s lips.

“No fucking way!” Yolei exclaimed, causing heads to turn from other tables and stare at her disapprovingly.

Before Kari could say or do anything, books toppled like bricks from the Berlin wall in ’89, as Yolei forced them aside. Talk about tear down the wall, she thought in amusement; the relevant part of Pink Floyd’s The Wall playing in her head. Her eyes met with those of her friend as the girl practically lay atop the now cleared table surface.

“Details,” Yolei said excitedly, albeit with enough force to have toppled the books with her voice alone, “now!”

“Sorry, Yolei,” she said, her eyes drifting down to her page, “we’ve got a report to write.”

Out of the corner of one eye, Kari saw the look of horror spread across her best friend’s face and she had to stifle a devilish grin. There was one other reason why she had been keeping this particular secret to herself. Given how much the lavender-haired girl would want all the juicy details, of which there were many, Kari knew she could extract a high price for them. And she had decided over the holidays exactly what it would be.

“Screw the report!” Yolei practically yelled at her; drawing more reproachful glares. The girl lowered her voice, “if you and Tai are back together, I want to know all the details, now.”

“If you blow up like that again, you’re going to get us thrown out,” Kari said as she wrote a line.”

“I do…” the girl started to yell, before somehow managing to lower her voice back down to an acceptable level. “I don’t care. There is no way you are keeping this from me. Now start spilling the beans, Kari.”

Kari sighed, deliberately sat down her pen and finally met her friend’s gaze. “What’s it worth to you?” she said with an evil grin.

“Since when did we start charging for girl talk? the lavender-haired girl hissed at her.

“Since you got the munchies and demanded I buy you that crepe back in the autumn.”

A look of horror spread across Yolei’s face as she said, “that was…”

Kari gave her a no-nonsense look.

“…fine,” her friend growled, “name your price.”

“Well, first off, now that I mention it, I’m feeling slightly peckish myself…” Kari said, letting her words hang.

“Fine, fine. We can pack up here and I’ll get you a stinking crepe.”

“…However, that only gets you the bare-bones facts of the matter. The meat is going to cost you more… much more.”

Outrage covered Yolei’s face, but Kari could see in her eyes that the girl was desperate to know every little detail. “I really hate you sometimes, Kari,” she said in resignation. “Fine, name your terms.”

“I’ve got a new outfit that I need a model for,” she replied with a devilish smile.

Yolei rolled her eyes as she stood up and started shoving books into her bag. “Somehow I get the feeling that I’m going to regret this.”

Kari followed suit and the pair quickly packed away their things. Before long they were on their way out of the study room and heading for the main entrance. A thin smile danced upon her lips as they began trudging through the snow to the crepe shop. Unbeknownst to her best friend, Kari was as desperate to talk about the events of the past two weeks, as she was to hear about them. 


	68. Pt5 06) Living on a knife edge

**Part Five: A Secret Exposed**

**Chapter Six: Living on a knife-edge**

If he were to look back on the time leading up to his university entrance exam, Tai Kamiya would probably remember very little beyond a mountain of books and an ever-increasing stack of empty energy drink cans on his desk. After he and Kari had narrowly escaped discovery in the aftermath of their first time sleeping together, the rest of the school holiday had passed in a blur. New Year had come and gone, during which they had attended a party, where Kari had feigned illness so that he could do the responsible thing and take her home, to an empty apartment. They'd done it twice that night and ensured they were in their respective rooms by the time their parents arrived home. After that, Tai had spent virtually every waking minute studying.

And so the big day had arrived. In the morning he had forced himself to eat breakfast, received messages of good luck from his family and then been walked to the test centre by his girlfriend. He'd then gone in to face his foe. A few hours later and it was over, done, finished. He was free. Afterwards, he'd spent some time with his soccer friends but excused himself in enough time to get to Odaiba Middle School in order to meet Kari. There was no one he'd rather celebrate with than his girlfriend.

“How did it go?” Kari asked him excitedly as she virtually pounced him.

Tai staggered slightly as he caught her mid-air and pulled her into a hug. “I think it went well,” he said truthfully, “however, in my experience, that usually means the opposite.”

“So long as you gave it your all, I'm sure you'll do well.” She smiled at him, “so, what do you want to do to celebrate?”

“I’ve no idea,” he laughed. “I’ve been studying for so long I’ve forgotten what else there is to do in life.”

Kari reached up and whispered in his ear, “maybe I need to remind you. Dad’s working late tonight and Mom is supposed to be going out to meet one of her friends for a few hours. We could have the place to ourselves for a bit… if you want?”

Tai grinned, but kept his voice low, “you know, if it wasn’t me that was your boyfriend, I’d probably have to kill him for corrupting you.”

She laughed. “I became corrupt long before you got involved, Brother. Now let’s go.”

He did not need any more encouragement than that.

##

When they arrived back home, it transpired that their mom had not left yet. So after getting changed, Tai brought the GameCube out and the pair took up residence on the sofa and began a heated round of Mario Kart to pass the time. Unlike the last time they’d played (the night they’d gotten back together), Kari was taking no prisoners.

“Brotherfucker!” Tai cursed when she hit him in the ass with a green turtle shell for the umpteenth time. It actually felt like she was deliberately letting him overtake her, just so she could do it again.

Kari flashed him a devilish grin. “You’d know all about that, wouldn’t you?” she said so only he would hear. “I think you’ve had your head in those school books for too long, you’ve gotten rusty.”

“I have not,” he snapped back, tossing a red shell at her, only for her to deploy a banana skin behind her at the last second to block it.

She laughed, “case and point, Tai,” as she burst through an item box.

He realised only too late, when he had pulled up behind her for a slipstream, that she’d deliberately slowed. Bam! The turtle shell hit him in the face and his kart went into a spin. By the time he had fended off the CPU, she was gone. He gave her a sour look, which only resulted in her laughter intensifying.

From the apartment door, he heard the voice of their mom call out, “ok, Kids, I’m going out. I’ll be back in a few hours.”

“Have fun, Mom,” they called out in unison.

When he heard the door close, Tai saw Kari sit her pad down. “Well, that was fun,” she said with a sly smile, “but…”

“Oh no, you don’t!” Tai declared hotly. He knew exactly what his girlfriend wanted to do, hell he wanted to do it too, but that last shell had been one bruise to his ego too many. “I want a rematch.”

She sighed and picked up her pad again. “We are celebrating your freedom from studying, I suppose. If you want to spend it getting your backside whooped, then fair enough.”

“Bring it, Bitch!”

“If you insist.

He shouldn’t have antagonised her. Over the next half an hour, in what could only be described as pure ruthlessness, Kari slaughtered him. In defeat, Tai tossed his pad down onto the coffee table. Maybe she had been right and he’d gotten rusty, or perhaps this was symptomatic of a far more serious problem; she was just better than him. He could hold his own against her at Killer Instinct, but he’d only managed one victory against her at Mario Kart since they had first started playing together again. And that had been when she’d felt so far down that she’d let him win. He hadn’t even dared to play her at Smash Bros yet…

“Tai,” Kari sing-song’ed mischievously. “Care to call me a bitch again and see what happens to you when we play our new game?”

One glance at the maniacal look in those devilish reddish-brown eyes convinced Tai that he did not want to find out. He couldn’t help but shudder, which caused her to laugh.

Kari waggled a finger in a beckoning sort of manner at him. “Come here, Tai. I promise I’ll be gentle.”

Before Tai could even react, his girlfriend had pounced on top of him. “Wah!” he yelled, as he fell back onto the couch, Kari landing on top of him. Her lips latched onto his and he could immediately taste the familiar sweetness that he’d quickly become addicted to. Like always, their tongues began to dance together like two flames, each taking it in turns to explore the other's mouth. Despite her initial overexuberance, his girlfriend slowed her pace, allowing them time to savour each moment.

Slowly, sensually, seductively, Kari sat up and slipped out of her t-shirt; allowing it to fall gently to the floor. From where he lay on the sofa, Tai watched as she wiggled her flat stomach and ran her hands through her lit-match hair. He could feel the bulge in his jeans form as she teased him. Her hands eventually reached behind her back and unclipped her bra. It too fell to the floor. He reached up to touch the soft flesh of her breasts, only for her to bat his hands away.

“Hands off,” she said with a grin as she squeezed her own breasts together. “You only get to touch when I say so.”

Tai had never been to a strip club, or had a lap dance for that matter. However, he doubted that any professional would be able to turn him on to the degree that his girlfriend’s seductive movements did. He could barely contain himself when she raised one of her own breasts up to her mouth and began to suck on the nipple. She then slipped a hand inside her own jeans and began rubbing herself.

A sound, that Tai knew could only belong to the front door opening, suddenly sounded and he froze. Kari had clearly heard it too as a split second later, she flattened herself on top of him. Heart in his mouth, he stared fearfully into his sister’s eyes. What the hell were they going to do?

“Hey, Kid’s, I’m back,” the unmistakable voice of their mom called out from the front door; she sounded slightly put out.

“Roll with me,” Kari hissed at him quickly.

For a split second, Tai looked blankly at his sister, then she rolled off of him and onto the floor with a thud. He quickly got her meaning, but figuratively did not follow, however, literally, he did. He landed on top of her, but quickly shifted as she scrambled to pull on her t-shirt. The noise would have undoubtedly attracted their mother’s attention, but it seemed Kari had come up with a plan for that.

“TAI, YOU GREEDY GIT! THAT WAS MY COOKIE!” she yelled at him, as she rolled him over so that she was now on top, while at the same time using her free hand to shove her bra out of sight beneath the sofa.

“I DIDN’T SEE YOUR NAME ON IT!” he yelled back as they began to wrestle.

“What the hell are you two doing?” their mom then said as she peered over the sofa at their mass of tangled limbs.

They both stopped to look up at the mortified expression on their mother’s face.

“Fatso here ate my cookie!” Kari spat indignantly and gave him a light punch in the gut.

“Oww,” Tai cursed but knew better than to retaliate. When they were younger, Kari always had a knack for getting away with one last free hit on him after their mom had come to break up the fight. However, should he ever try it, the woman would come down on him like a tonne of bricks. “It was only a cookie.”

Their mom shook her head long-sufferingly. “The pair of you are sixteen and eighteen respectively. I would have thought by now that I could leave you both at home without coming home to find you rolling around on the floor over a cookie. Am I going to have to send you to your rooms now?”

Tai and Kari looked at one another, pretended to see the funny side of the situation and began to laugh. His sister stood up and offered her hand to him by way of a ‘peace offering’, which he took and allowed her to help him to his feet. Fortunately, the shock of almost being caught had worked wonders on his erection. They sat back down on the couch and once their mom had disappeared down the hallway, Kari quickly fetched her bra and put it back on.

“That was too close,” Tai said quietly as he took in a calming breath.

“Agreed,” Kari replied. “In all honesty, I’ll almost be relieved once we tell them.”

“We need to go back to being more careful. That’s twice in a few weeks we’ve screwed up now.”

Reluctantly, Kari nodded. “I’m fed up having to be careful, but you’re right. We’re taking too many risks.” He watched her pick up her gamepad. “Smash Bros?” she asked with a devilish grin.


	69. Pt5 07) Discovery

**Part Five: A Secret Exposed**

**Chapter Seven: Discovery**

The weekend had ended, with Monday morning arriving right on schedule. For Matt Ishida, it had been a very bad Monday morning. Having half moved in with his new girlfriend and her roommate over the past few weeks, he had spent the night there. And they’d got drunk... very drunk. To the point that he’d woken up with a stonking headache. Unfortunately, Teiko had taken zero pity on him and physically hauled his ass out of bed, claiming that if she had to go to work, he needed to go to school. When he’d protested, she had simply told him that life could be a bitch sometimes, much like her and he would just have to learn to deal with it. Apparently, if he had wanted to sleep late, he should have dropped out of school. At least Sakura (her roommate) had made them all a pot of very strong coffee.

The morning had only gotten worse from there, as Teiko had then told him he was in no state to ride his moped and had taken his keys. Thus, he’d been forced to walk in the snow. All the while his head feeling like his bass had gotten lodged inside it and started playing. To cap it off, he’d gotten into trouble for being late. The day had only gone downhill from there. At lunchtime, not only had he brought nothing with him, but he’d also discovered that he’d forgotten his wallet. Unfortunately, his dwindling list of friends at school had left him with no one to mooch off of. So he’d spent lunchtime sulking by himself with nothing to eat and his head still pounding.

School sucked, royally, he thought bitterly when the day finally ended. With their university entrance exam over and down with, there was no real obligation to stay beyond the end of the normal day. Hell, there was little point in them still being there full stop. In all honesty, he’d been feeling for quite some time that he could not wait to be shot of the place. After his breakup with Sora, the altercation with Tai and the implosion of the Teenage Wolves, his small circle of school friends had evaporated. Not that he missed any of them. Teiko hung with far more interesting people and with her help, he’d even started putting together a new band. Yeah, as soon as school ended, life would be sweet.

Halfway towards the exit, he caught sight of someone waiting at the gate; a blue bicycle beside her. From the green uniform, he could tell that they went to Odaiba Middle School. However, it was the head of bright orange hair, like it was aflame that drew his attention. She was hot, he thought and if not for the fact that he was very happy with Teiko (baring this morning’s incident), he would certainly have gone and introduced himself. Whoever she was waiting on, they were one lucky bastard. An image of Teiko floated through his mind. Granted, perhaps not as lucky as he was. Drawing closer, his eyes widened when he saw the figure who greeted her, Kamiya. He felt a brief flash of anger before he reminded himself of what Teiko had said to him, who cared. So what if Tai was dating a hot chick, it didn’t affect him. He’d gotten out of a bad relationship with Sora and come up trumps. What was it to him if… he did a double-take. Wait a minute, he knew that bicycle. His eyes travelled up to stare upon the girl’s face. It was Kari; she had not noticed him.

Matt almost burst out laughing, recalling what Teiko had told him about Tai and his secret crush on his sister. Looking like that, he would wager that Kari drove her brother crazy just by standing there. Sucks to be you, Tai, he thought with a snigger, watching as the siblings wandered off down the street. When he himself reached the exit, he turned to follow them, for no reason other than it was the same direction in which he needed to head. He kept his distance, having no wish to engage with either of them; his mood was bad enough already.

Matt continued on his way back to Teiko’s, paying little heed to the siblings in front of him. Indeed, it was only when they turned to go in the opposite direction to the one he was headed, that he took note and stopped dead. His eyes widened at the sight of them. Side by side, with bikes on the outside, Tai and Kari were holding hands.

“No way,” Matt breathed to himself, fragments of the drunken conversation he’d had with Teiko on that first night playing through his mind.

_“Kamiya is in love with his sister…” _he heard Teiko say.

_“…Of all the people I know, if any of them had a brother complex, it would be Kari Kamiya…” _his own voice replied.

He stood and watched them cross the road, transfixed. After a few moments, his feet began to move of their own accord and when he reached the crossroad, he turned to follow them. Matt couldn’t believe it, as his eyes found the Kamiya siblings joined hands once more. Surely this was just one of those weird, slightly too close, things they did. Yes, that must be it. Except he had a strong feeling that it wasn’t. Keeping his distance, he continued to follow them. They certainly weren’t going home, that much was certain.

After about ten minutes, Tai and Kari crossed the road and stopped to lock up their bikes. Matt stopped too, ensuring he kept a safe distance. He watched as they entered a coffee shop. Electing to remain on this side, he walked forward until he drew level with the shop. His gaze scanned the windows until he found the pair sitting in a booth right beside one of them. Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out his phone, opened the camera and used it’s zoom function to get a better look. The resolution may not have been the best, but he could still make out who the individuals were. He waited, for what, he did not know. Several minutes passed, during which Tai went and got himself and Kari a hot beverage. Meanwhile, outside, Matt could feel the wind pick up and start to bite at his un-gloved hands and unprotected face. This was stupid, he thought. It’s getting colder and I’m standing here in the hopes of seeing what? He was just about to pocket his phone and head for Teiko’s place when it happened. Through his phone screen, he saw Kari reach out over the table and kiss Tai full on the lips.

Matt froze as his eyes once again widened in horror. Holy shit! Tai and Kari were snogging each other! Hastily his finger hit the capture button, just moments before the siblings broke off the kiss. This was too much to take in. Robotically, he lowered his phone and pocketed it. His fingers were numb and he felt cold to his core. Mind having blown a fuse, Matt turned and began walking. What had he just witnessed? The answer to that was obvious, the Kamiya siblings snogging of course. But what did it mean? Were they… involved with each other… An if so, for how long?

As questions of a similar nature began to swim through his mind, he recalled once more that first night he’d spent with Teiko and the conversation they’d shared. Tai had been in love with his sister since before that night. That much Teiko had assured him of being true. But what about Kari? He cast his mind further back. Kari had told TK that she’d broken up with him because she was in love with someone else, but no one had ever materialised. It certainly hadn’t been Davis, who she’d used for petty revenge purposes. Had it been Tai all this time? Had she been in love with her own brother back then? And then used TK as some way to try and suppress her own feelings? Slowly the pieces began to slot together in his head… yes, it had to be. It was the only thing that made sense. Which meant he now had a decision to make. Did he keep this to himself and hope that TK would eventually get over Kari? His brother had hardly done a good job of that so far. Or did he tell him and run the risk of it setting him over the edge, in the hopes that the knowledge might grant his brother some sort of closure? It was a difficult choice and one that, at present, he did not have an answer for.

Tuning a corner, Matt began making his way back to Teiko and Sakura’s apartment. Maybe talking it through with his girlfriend would help him reach a decision. That’s if she didn’t completely flip out, find the remnants of last night’s bourbon plus any other booze she could lay her hands on and get them all drunk again in celebration of the ‘happy couple’. Both of those ideas, alcohol and incest, made Matt want to puke. Unfortunately, given time, Teiko would probably find a way to wear him down on both counts. Shaking his head, he continued on his way back to the apartment.


	70. Pt5 08) Conflict

**Part Five: A Secret Exposed**

**Chapter Eight: Conflict**

It had been bitter cold that morning and the snow had fallen without pause. However, it had nowhere near reached the level required for school to be closed. Unfortunately, the roads had iced over in several places, so Kari had chosen to walk, rather than risk it on her bike. She’d pulled a pair of leggings, along with her winter boots on, for the trek that morning and would have very much liked to keep them on in school, except the rules did not permit it; rather misogynistic in her opinion. 

Arriving in homeroom, she sat down near the back beside Yolei and Davis; Cody soon joined them. They’d not all hung out together since before the new year and Kari was just about to suggest that they do so sometime soon, when the last member of the group arrived.

Without warning, TK barked, “Is it true?” at them.

She turned to look at the boy, unsure of a) what was wrong with him and b) who exactly his remark had been aimed at. Gone was the cheerful smile and the bright look behind his eyes that she was accustomed to. Instead, his eyes were dark and slightly bloodshot. Had he slept last night? And his lips were thin and his expression murderous.

“Is it true?” he barked again, still not directing his words to anyone in particular, though his gaze had zeroed in on her own.

Kari was about to open her mouth to ask him what on earth he was talking about, but Yolei beat her to it, “do you want to just relax, TK, and tell us what you’re talking about?”

“Stay out of this, Yolei,” TK snapped at the lavender haired girl, “this is between me and Kari.” His gaze locked onto her own once more. “Is it true?”

“Is what true?” Kari asked in confusion.

“Are you fucking Tai?”

Shock flooded over Kari like the boy had just thrust a knife into her belly and her mouth fell open. She stared into those once warm blue eyes and found them to be uncharacteristically merciless. He needn’t have bothered asking the question for she could see that he already knew the answer. Somehow and she had absolutely no idea how, but TK had discovered the secret about her relationship with Tai. Suddenly the bottom fell out of her world and her skin turned to ice.

Before she even had the chance to deny it, TK said, “holy fuck it is.”

Davis blindly leapt to her defence, “what the fuck, Dude! Don’t spread shit like that! It's not even funny.”

While Cody took the more diplomatic approach and asked, “what is he talking about, Kari?”

Yolei, who knew the truth, looked almost as shocked as Kari herself felt.

“She’s been fucking her own goddamn brother!” TK replied angrily in response to Cody’s question, not bothering to keep his voice down.

“TK, I told you to shut the hell up!”

“He’s not serious, Kari... is he?” Cody asked before turning to TK. “Where did you hear this?”

“Matt saw the two of them snogging in a coffee shop after school last week. He showed me the picture he took last night.”

“I might have known Matt had something to do with this, ” Davis growled. “He’s had it in for Tai ever since we beat the crap out of you guys.”

Kari could not form words to say anything. Even if she could, she had no idea what to say. She couldn’t confirm that TK’s claim was true, but at the same time, could not bring herself to deny it. How could she? To deny that she was in a relationship with Tai would be disowning a part of herself. Even the thought of it felt akin to chopping off her own arm. That was not the only thought bulldozing its way through her mind. Seeing TK like this, the anger in his eyes and the abhorrence contorting his features doused her with guilt and shame. This was all her fault. His anger, pain, hate and suffering, she was the root cause of it all. In her own selfish desire to deny and reject her own feelings, she had taken one of the nicest people she had ever met and twisted his heart and soul to the point that he had become almost unrecognisable. It hadn’t been deliberate, but she had done it nonetheless. Memories of eighteen months ago began to fill her mind. Of the night she broke his heart and the subsequent arguments. And Kari found that she could not face that again. In the end, she found herself, in the softest, most fragile of voices, uttering the same thing she had said on that fateful date, “TK, I’m so sorry.”

Though she could not see it, a look of shock had just spread across both Davis and Cody’s faces; her words having been akin to an admission. “Kari,” the former stammered, “tell me he’s not telling the truth.”

She felt the hand of Yolei reach out and touch her limp shoulder. “Kari, it’s ok,” she said in the most reassuring voice that she could muster.

The other groups of students had one by one ceased their own conversations as they had taken note of the spectacle and were now watching intently.

“It’s not ‘ok’, Yolei,” TK barked. “What part of her fucking Tai is in any way, shape or form ‘ok’? It’s completely fucking sick.” The boy’s gaze then returned to Kari, but she could not meet it. “Tell me one thing, Kari. That’s all I’m asking. Answer me this one thing truthfully. You owe me that much. Was Tai the one eighteen months ago?”

Tears began to form in Kari’s eyes and she could not force her eyes to look into those tortured blues. TK knew anyway, what was the point in denying it now? She’d always regretted the fact that she had never been able to tell him who it was she had been in love with. That she’d never trusted in him as a friend, sat him down and explained everything to him. Would he still think her abhorrent, possibly. However, it may well have lessened his pain and allowed him to properly move on. He was right, she did owe him the truth. In a broken voice that could barely pass as a whisper, Kari spoke a single word, “yes.”

There was a loud gasp from the two boys sitting next to her and one or two from people in the nearest cluster of onlookers. After a moment or two, voices began to whisper and like a wave, the gossip spread throughout the room.

“You’re a cruel, despicable bitch, Kari,” TK spat.

TK’s words piled upon the torrent of guilt, shame, fear and self-loathing that wracked Kari and finally became too much for her to bear. Hot tears now streaming down her cheeks, she did the only thing she could; she ran. Faceless heads turned to look at her and voices rose up around her as she ran through the desks. Her vision blurred by the tears in her eyes, her hip caught the corner of one but she did not stop. She just had to get out.

Kari did not see what happened next. Had no knowledge of the crowd that began to swarm around TK. The question of whether or not she was actually fucking her brother being asked from every direction. Nor did she hear the warning Yolei gave him to shut up, the boy ignoring her as he uttered the word yes or the deafening sound of the lavender haired girl’s palm hitting his face as she slapped him. Kari witnessed none of this, but that does not mean that it did not happen.

##

Across town in Odaiba High School, Tai Kamiya was sitting in a maths lesson completely bored stiff. With his university entrance exam now out of the way, his aptitude for study was sub-zero. This was completely pointless, he thought bitterly for the umpteenth time. For what purpose did they need to remain in school, now that the exam was over and done with. The entire year had been devoted to preparing for that singular test and now that they had sat it, why did they still have to go to school for the next two weeks? At this exact moment in time, he could be sitting at home playing Mario Kart. Attempting to up his skill level for another rematch against his girlfriend. This was stupid!

Tai pressed too hard on his pencil and caused the tip to break. Cursing, he reached into his bag for another one. He had just finished fumbling around when the bell to signal the end of class and the subsequent start of morning break sounded. Sighing deeply, he dropped the pencil back into it and then shoved his books in on top. Rising from his chair, he slung the bag over his shoulder and slouched off towards the door.

His eyes scanned the faces that surrounded him. It seemed he was not alone in his boredom. In fact, the bulk of the final year students still looked worn down from the weeks upon weeks of relentless study and exam prep they had endured. Maybe that was why so many adults we’re so boring; they never recovered from sitting their university entrance exam. Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out his earbuds and popped them inside his ears. He was in no mood to socialise today and by the looks of everyone else in his year, neither were they. Flicking through the albums, he eventually settled on Pink Floyd’s Wish You Were Here. By the time the guitarist played those haunting four notes for the first time, he’d found a quiet spot in a social area. Allowing all thought to slip from his mind like sand through his fingers, Tai sat back and allowed the music to soothe him. Inside his trouser pocket, he was consciously aware of his phone vibrating, but he ignored it for now. Indeed, only when the closing notes of Shine on you Crazy Diamond Pts1-5 faded into the opening of Welcome to the Machine, did he bother to take it out and look at it.

A smile formed on Tai’s face when he saw who it was from; Kari. Only it quickly vanished when he read, _“Tai, I’m in serious trouble and don’t know what to do. I need your help.” _

His eyes widened in horror as he read his girlfriend’s message and he felt a wave of panic crash over him. What had happened to her? What trouble could she be in? Oh god, what if she was seriously hurt? Hastily he typed back, _“Kari, what’s happened? Where are you?”_

The wait for her reply was torturous for Tai, as images of possible things that could have happened to his girlfriend filled his mind. After what felt like an age, but in actuality was less than a minute, she messaged back, _“I think I’m in the park near my school. Tai, I’m scared. Please, come get me.”_

As soon as he read the message, Tai was off. Like a bullet train, he ran through the corridors to the main exit. On his way, he passed the vice-principle, who yelled at him about running in the corridors, but he completely ignored the man. Kari was in trouble and he had to go to her. That was all that mattered.


	71. Pt5 09) Rocky paths

**Part Five: A Secret Exposed**

**Chapter Nine: Rocky paths**

The park was virtually empty as snow continued to pile up on the ground. On a bench beneath a tree, that provided minimal shelter from the biting wind and falling flakes, sat Kari Kamiya. She had no idea how she had gotten here or exactly where here was. The park near her school she had surmised when asked by her boyfriend. After running out of the classroom, she’d headed straight for the exit. Once outside, she’d started to walk and not looked back. How long it had taken her to reach the park, she did not know. However, at some point, either while walking or after she’d sat down, she’d put her headphones on and started listening to music. It had helped to calm her down.

Kari took in a deep breath of cold air, which caught in her chest, as she listened to the soothing notes of Hergest Ridge. She did not recall putting the album on. Tai would be here soon, she told herself. Tai would come and make everything better.

_“That’s a lie, little Kari,” _a voice hissed from the dark depths of her mind, _“and you know it. Tai can’t fix this problem.”_

“Shut up!” Kari yelled inside her own head, a hint of desperation in her voice. “I don’t need to listen to you.”

_“No, but you will. You know full well that not even big brother can fix this. The Gatomon’s out of the bag now, whether you want it to be or not.”_

The voice was right and she knew it. Not only did TK and the rest of her friends now know about her relationship with Tai, but most likely her whole class. TK had hardly kept his voice down when confronting her. A fresh wave of panic crashed over her. What were they going to do? No doubt by the end of the day, all of their friends would know.

_“And you think you can handle mom and dad finding out,” _the voice hissed. _“You ran away when only one of your friends confronted you. You’re pathetic.”_

She had no response to this. Instead, she could feel another wave of hot tears start to pour forth. “Tai, where are you?” she whispered in desperation.

##

Tai ran faster than he had ever gone before. Even though the snow was starting to pile up on the sidewalks, he crushed it underfoot like it were nothing. Along busy roads, around corners and through side-streets he bolted. Each person or obstacle that sprung up in his path was deftly sidestepped or spun around as though an opposing team member on the soccer field. He had to get to Kari, she was all that mattered. What could possibly have happened to her, he thought as he cut through an alley? Obviously, she’d left school, or never made it there in the first place. But that did not help him come to any sort of conclusion. Instead, it simply ramped up the worry factor.

Reaching the park close to Odaiba Middle School, his eyes began to scan the area for any sign of a green uniform/jacket or bright orange hair. What if she isn’t here, he asked himself? It was a distinct possibility. Kari herself had not been sure of her exact location. If that transpired to be the case, he’d have to try and call her again (she’d ignored his previous attempts) or hope she would answer a text message. Failing that, he’d need to find a map and start searching all nearby greenspaces. Feet hammering along the snow-covered path, he continued to search. Eventually, towards the back of the park, he caught sight of something green and orange. He left the path and veered off towards it. His paced ramped up to a burst sprint the second he had confirmation that the figure was Kari.

He had to force air into his lungs to yell, “KARI!”

She didn’t respond, although when he saw that she had her headphones on, it made sense. Reaching her side, Tai reached out a hand and touched her on the shoulder. She jumped.

“Kari, are you ok?” he asked through laboured breaths when she took off her headphones.

“Tai,” Kari breathed when her eyes looked up to stare at him; she’d been crying.

Instinctively, he wrapped his arms around her. When their cheeks touched, he could feel how cold she was. “Kari, you’re freezing, how long have you been sitting here?”

“I don’t know,” she replied, her voice sounding fragile. “I left school during homeroom.”

Shit, Tai thought to himself. She’d been outside for about three hours. And while he was desperate to find out what had happened, he needed to get her somewhere warm. However, if he took her home, their mom would ask far too many questions that he did not have answers for at present. “Come on,” he said as he helped her to stand, “I’ll take you for a hot drink and we can talk.”

Taking his girlfriend by the hand, Tai led her back to the path and out of the park. There was a coffee shop across the road and so he headed straight for it. When they got inside, he sat her down at a table beside a radiator and went to order them both a hot chocolate. While Kari no longer suffered the health problems she had in her youth, Tai had a bad feeling that three hours outside in the current climate would result in her becoming sick. He put the beverages on the table and sat down.

“Here, drink this,” he said, sliding a mug towards his girlfriend.

He watched her pale hands take the mug and recoil slightly from its heat. “Thank you,” she whispered.

“I’m just glad you’re safe,” Tai replied, his voice laced with concern. “But what were you doing in the park? Did something happen at school?”

Kari lifted the mug and took a small sip; her hands shaking. When she sat it back down, she looked him in the eyes and said, “TK knows about us.”

“What!” Tai yelled in alarm. He had to force himself to reign in his voice when he asked, “how did he find out? What happened?”

“Matt… apparently he saw us when we went for coffee last week… he showed TK a picture of us kissing.”

“That bastard!” Tai cursed, hitting his fist off the tabletop and drawing a reproachful look from the woman behind the counter. Of all the people who could have found out about them, why did it have to have been Matt?

“It gets worse,” Kari croaked and took another sip from her mug.

“How can it get worse?”

“TK confronted me in homeroom. He demanded to know if…” she paused and he could see that she was on the verge of tears, “…if I was fucking you.” Her eyes met his and he could see the fear in those reddish-browns. “He practically yelled it at me. Davis, Cody and probably half of my class heard him. By now, all of them probably know.”

Tai felt anger swell up inside him. While he hated the idea of everyone in Kari’s class knowing about them, the majority of it was directed towards TK. How dare he yell at her like that and make her feel so upset that the only thing she could think to do was run from the building. Indeed, if it were not for the fact that Kari needed him here, he would have headed straight for her school to beat the shit out of the little bastard. Instead, he reached out a hand and took one of hers. “It’s going to be ok, Kari,” he said, though even he did not believe it. “Our friends were going to find out sooner or later. We’re just going to have to deal with any backlash that comes from it.” It was easy for him to say that, he thought. He was not the one who would have to face his classmates and all the shit they might through. Even if Kari were to outright deny it, such rumours would probably dog her until she went to high school in the spring. Even then…

“It was horrible, Tai,” Kari then said. “All the pain and anger that caused TK to do what he did… I did that to him.”

“Kari you…”

She cut him off, “don’t tell me that I didn’t, Tai.” Her eyes lowered to the floor. “Maybe this is what I deserve. I was a total bitch to him and couldn’t even tell him the truth.”

“You made a mistake, Kari,” Tai said firmly. “However, that does not give TK the right to treat you like that. There’s a way of doing things and he was out of line.”

“Say’s the person that wants to go and beat him up for having hurt me.”

Kari’s words cut through his thought process and his mouth fell open. “Kari…”

“Tell me I’m wrong.”

Tai sighed, there was no point in lying to her, she could see straight through him. “You’re not wrong.” Another sigh. “I guess people have a bad habit of being reactionary when they or someone they love gets hurt. However, that still does not mean that you deserved to have him do that to you.”

“That still doesn't change what I did to him.”

“I don't care about TK, I care about you.” He gave her hand a squeeze. “Are you ok?”

“What are we going to do, Tai?” there was a fear in her voice that he did not know how to quell.

“Well,” he began, not really sure what he could possibly say. After a moments pause, he decided to take it one step at a time. “First, we're going to drink these, ”he picked up his mug and took a drink, “and we're going to stay here until you've properly warmed up. After that, I’m going to take you out for lunch. We can then hang out until we get the inevitable call from mom asking us why we ditched school.”

His words seemed to calm her down until he made mention of their mother. “Oh God, Tai, what are we going to say to her? What if the school tell her what TK said?” Kari replied frantically.

Tai thought about this for a moment. There was a genuine danger that TK’s words might be passed on to her. However, that hinged on one simple fact, “was the teacher present when TK yelled at you about us?” he asked.

After a moment, she shook her head, “no.”

“Then that's one thing we don't have to worry about, ” Tai said reassuringly. “Unless the teacher actually heard something specific and made the call home personally, it'll just be the regular, ‘your daughter was absent today, blah, blah, blah,’ call from the office staff.”

“But how do we explain the fact that both of us played hooky today?”

He thought about this as they drank some more of their hot chocolate. While not as disastrous as their mom hearing word from school that she had run out because someone had accused her of sleeping with her brother, their absence would still raise awkward questions. Not to mention a reading of the riot act. And, unless he found some way of shifting the blame towards himself, this would be one of the rare instances where Kari would come off worse than him. For he at least had the excuse that he had sat his university entrance exam and school was now virtually pointless. Eventually, he said, “we tell her a version of the truth.”

Kari gave him a look of resignation, “I suppose, we’re getting rather good at that.”

“We'll tell her that TK found out about your fake boyfriend, ” he scratched his head, “what was it you called him?”

“Takato.”

“Yeah. We'll tell him that TK found out about you and Takato and that he lost his shit at you over it. That he upset you that much, you just couldn’t handle it and had to leave. Especially since you only recently broke up with him.” He gave her a warm smile and squeezed her hand again.

Kari weakly returned the smile. “But what about you?”

“Simple. We tell her the truth. That you messaged me and I came to get you because I was worried.”

“Do you think mom will buy that?” she asked, her voice laced with concern.

Tai nodded, “yeah. She's not overly happy about it, but I think she’s finally accepted that I'm your first port of call when something happens.”

Kari tilted her head in confusion. “How do you know that?”

“I figured it out when she virtually begged me to tell her what was wrong with you a few weeks ago.”

“You mean when you sold me down the river because you couldn't handle her,” Kari said, giving him an actual smile and a light laugh.

“Hey, that worked out well for you in the end. If I hadn't set the framework for you to spin your story of heartbreak, you'd still be wearing your old pink coat and your hair would be an ever-increasing mess of brown. You made off like a bandit!”

“Jeeze, Tai, you sure know how to flatter a lady,” she retorted in mock offence.

He laughed, “don’t give me that all offended routine. I’m on to your manipulative ways now.”

The comment was enough to cause her to laugh. “Took you long enough.”

He joined in with her laughter. It was a temporary fix, he knew that, but it would still help in the long run. They sat and talked about other things for a bit while they drank the last of their hot chocolates. When they finished, he checked to see if her temperature had gone up, before they left the coffee shop.

##

After they had left the coffee shop, Tai had let her choose where they went to lunch. She picked a ramen shop, which, given the weather, turned out to be a good shout. They ate large bowls of hot steaming ramen and they had almost forgotten all about why they were here and not in school when her phone went. Pulling it out of her pocket, Kari saw Davis’ name then read, _“hey, guys, I don’t know what the hell is going on between the two of you, but txt’s have been flying between the gang all day trying to figure it out. Everyone’s decided to meet up after school, but it doesn’t sound like the two of you are invited. However, I disagree and want to hear your side of things. 5:30 under the bridge by the river, if you’re interested.” _She closed her phone and pocketed it.

“It sounds like we’re what our friends have spent the whole day talking about,” she said with a healthy dose of bitterness in her tone. She hated the idea of their relationship being the subject of such gossip and the content of Davis’ message had succeeded in rubbing her the wrong way.

“Yeah, I gathered,” Tai replied, holding up his own phone. “He sent it to me too. I guess it was to be expected.”

“Some friends they are if none of them have even bothered to ask either of us about it,” she retorted angrily.

“I don’t like it either, but given the nature of the subject, I can see why they might not want to ask us until they get the facts straight,” Tai replied, sounding like he was trying to placate her. “I guess we’ll have to gate crash and set the record straight.”

That idea scared Kari. If she had not already had to deal with TK that morning, maybe the prospect wouldn’t be so bad. She had known for a while now that if they wanted to have a relationship long term, that this day would come. Just why did it have to be today? “I don’t know if I can face them, Tai. Not after this morning and especially not if TK’s going to be there.”

Her boyfriend reached out, took both her slender hands in his own and stared into her eyes. “We need to face them sooner or later, Kari. And I’d rather get it over and done with in one sitting, but I can’t do it alone. I need you with me.”

Deep down she knew he was right. If they did not take this opportunity, while they were all together, the whole affair could drag on for days, as one by one each of the other DigiDestined plucked up the courage to talk to them. Resigned to her fate, she nodded in agreement, “ok. I’ll go with you.”

“It’ll be ok, so long as we’re together,” Tai then said in a voice she guessed was supposed to reassure her; it didn’t.

They returned to their bowls of ramen, but the message from Davis had soured both the taste of the broth and the afternoon in general. When her boyfriend had finished his, Kari slid her bowl over to him. He might as well enjoy it as she certainly would not now. She watched him slurp the remains of her noodles but was soon distracted when her phone went off again. The message this time was from Yolei, who had left her several throughout the day already, and said, _“Kari, this whole thing has blown up amongst our friends and they’ve all decided to meet up down by the river, under the bridge, at 5:30. By the sound of things, no one wants to invite you and Tai. I guess they’d all rather just bitch about the rumours than hear the actual truth. Regardless, I think you and Tai need to come and set the record straight. If you do, you’ll have my full support. Love, Yolei.”_

Kari read the message twice and felt like the weight had been lifted off her chest a little. While she would have hoped her best friend would have their corner, actually hearing her say so made the whole thing seem that little bit easier.

“Who was it this time?” Tai asked.

“Yolei,” Kari replied. “She said the same thing as Davis and that if we decide to show up, she’ll give us her support.”

“That’s good. At least one out of nine will be on our side.”

“Nine?” Kari asked in confusion, doing a quick count in her head and reaching ten plus themselves.

“Joe’s not in Tokyo, remember. I somehow doubt he’s taken a train back to Odaiba, just to hear some gossip about us.”

“I’d forgotten about Joe being away at university,” as she spoke, a thought came to her, “it might only be eight then.”

It was Tai’s turn to look confused, “eight?”

“Ken might not be there either, as he’d need to get a train pretty quickly to make it in time.”

“I suppose we’ll just have to wait and see who turns up then,” Tai stated.

“I guess so,” she agreed.

They sat in silence after that, thoughts of what each of their friends might think about their relationship floating through Kari’s head. TK was obviously against it and she suspected Matt would probably be in agreement with him, owing to the current hostilities that existed between him and Tai. Izzy would try to be diplomatic, but in the end, probably advise them that it was a bad idea. Mimi might have an open enough mind to accept that they were in love. And Sora… while she and Tai had started mending the bridge, she did not know how the ginger-haired girl felt about her at present. Unfriendly might be a good starting point. As for the other younger DigiDestined, she was not certain. Was Davis’ easy-going nature enough to sway him into accepting them? He had been the one to contact them after all. Perhaps Ken, given his relationship with Yolei, might be open to sharing his girlfriend's point of view. However, she could not say which side of the coin Cody would land on.

Kari sighed. It was pointless for her to try and figure out how people would react once they heard the truth. Or if they could be persuaded to change their minds after the initial knee jerks subsided. In a few hours, all would be known. She would just have to wait and see. 


	72. Pt5 10) Us and them

**Part Five: A Secret Exposed**

**Chapter Ten: Us and Them**

The sun was low down on the horizon when Tai and Kari began making their way towards the meeting place. After receiving the messages from Davis and Yolei, they'd both agreed to ignore their mother and deal with that problem once they got home. They'd then finished lunch and headed in the general direction of the bridge. However, given that they still had some time to kill, they’d gone into another coffee shop keep themselves warm. Only now the time had come to face their friends. They walked slowly through the still falling snow, neither in any rush. Given what had happened the last time they had walked to this particular spot by the river, they did not relish the return.

They turned a corner and the bridge came into view. Tai pulled out his phone and glanced at the time; 5:28 pm. “Assuming no one is running late, they should all be there by now.”

Kari nodded in response. They had agreed to arrive late, so as to ensure everyone else was already there. That way, one of them would be unable to tell the others to go somewhere else or to reschedule. Up ahead, they saw a figure they recognised as Davis heading down the stairs. Giving his tardy nature, if he was on time that probably meant that the rest were, as Tai had suggested, already there. However, they did not bother to pick up the pace.

Just before they reached the top of the stairs, Tai stopped and turned to look at Kari. “No matter what they say, it won’t change how I feel about you,” he affirmed.

Kari nodded, “I know. It won’t change how I feel either. We’ll get through this together, agreed.”

“Agreed. However, let’s go down quietly. I wouldn’t mind getting a feel for the crowd before we make our entrance.”

For Kari, descending those stairs felt akin to deliberately walking into a pit-fall trap. She’d probably survive, but who knew what injury she might sustain. However, if this was how she felt now, then the day she and Tai chose to tell their parents would probably feel like going to the executioner’s block.

Tai too felt similar nerves. He’d faced a lot in his life, danger and death chief amongst them during his adventures in the Digital world. Yet this was an entirely different prospect. Even though the group had become fractured over the past eighteen months, these individuals were still his closest friends. And very soon he could find himself having lost them all in one go. It was a daunting reality, but one he had resigned himself to the night he had decided he wished to be in a long-term relationship with his sister.

Halfway down the stairs, the couple began to hear voices. After a few more softly taken steps, they tucked in against the wall and strained their ears a little to listen.

“…I think we all want to hear the truth of this matter…” that was definitely Izzy.

“…well duh,” a voice that could only be Mimi said. “Why else do you think we’re standing here in the freezing cold with the snow piling up around us.”

“At least you didn’t have to trek across the city at short notice just to get here.” So, Ken had managed to come.

“It doesn’t matter how we all got here. What matters is that Tai and Kari are sick degenerates.” Even through the anger, that voice undoubtedly belonged to TK.

“We shouldn’t judge them before we know the whole story,” the calming voice of Sora interjected.

“What does it matter? Tai and Kari are still our friends and I think it was wrong of you all to agree to meet like this without inviting them.” It seemed that Davis at least was not out to condemn them.

Unsurprisingly, Yolei backed him up, “I can’t believe I’m saying this, but Davis is right. Tai and Kari are our friends. So what if they’re in love?”

“How can you just say, so what, like that?” Cody interjected. “They’re brother and sister.”

“You can’t help who you fall in love with,” Yolei snapped.

“It’s sick!” TK virtually yelled.

“Before this devolves into a pointless argument over speculation and rumour, can we at least get the facts straight?” Izzy said in what sounded like an attempt to restore order to proceedings.

There was a muttering of agreement from the assembled group.

“Good,” Izzy continued. “From what I’ve heard, only one of us actually knows the whole story. Matt…”

A, “hmph,” that could only have come from Matt was heard before the blonde-haired teen properly spoke. “If you all wanted to know so badly, why didn’t you bother Tai or Kari? I’ve got better things to do than supply you lot with gossip.”

It came as somewhat of a shock that Matt had not chosen to savage both of them at the first opportunity, given his current disposition towards them. However, his attitude was definitely in keeping with his typical demeanour. They both listened as he continued.

“The only reason I told TK in the first place was because I thought it might help him get some closure and finally get rid of that ‘I love Kari’ shrine he keeps in a box under his bed... Yeah, Bro, I know about that.”

Tai and Kari looked at each other in bemusement. Wordlessly they asked each other if what Matt said about TK having a shrine box to her was true. While Tai did not particularly care if TK was over his sister, Kari felt herself doused in another shower of guilt and pity. Did TK really keep a box of things associated with her, she wondered?

“If you didn’t want to tell us, why did you agree to come?” Mimi asked irritably.

“Fine,” Matt barked in irritation. “If you want to know what I saw so badly, here it is…”

The entire group went silent for a moment and only the sound of their boots shuffling on the ground could be heard. After a moment, Izzy’s voice spoke up, “are you certain that’s Kari?”

“I saw them meet up outside my school, it’s Kari,” Matt said firmly.

Just in case his brother’s testimony was not enough, TK then added, “she’s wearing an Odaiba Middle School uniform. Kari is the only one in our school that has hair like **that**.”

“In that case, this is pretty damning evidence,” Izzy then said.

“What do you mean damning?” Yolei yelled. “So what if they are in love with each other? It’s not something they chose to let happen; it just did.”

“It sounds like you know more than you're letting on, Yolei,” Izzy said in a suspicious tone.

Before Yolei had the chance to say anything, Cody interjected with, “it’s their choice to act on it though. And I agree with TK, I think what they’re doing is wrong.”

“That still doesn’t excuse what TK did this morning,” Davis countered. “You yelled at the entire class that Kari was sleeping with Tai, but you have no proof of that. That photo only shows them kissing. And no one’s even bothered to ask them for their side of the story”

Sensing that this was about to devolve into a massive argument, Tai looked at Kari. “I think that’s our cue to enter,” he said, giving her a look of resolve.

Kari took a deep breath. “Ok, here we go. Into the woods.”

Hands clasped tightly together, Tai and Kari descended the final few stairs and turned to face the assembled DigiDestined.

“Instead of speculating over a photo, why don’t you all ask us what you want to know?” Tai said firmly.

All heads turned in their direction, looks of shock, disbelief and guilt spreading across seven of the nine faces. Before anyone could say anything, Yolei strode through the crowd and wrapped her arms around Kari.

“Are you alright?” the lavender-haired girl asked with concern.

“I’m fine,” Kari said softly. “I was quite shaken up, but Tai helped calm me down.”

Yolei released her grip on Kari and moved to stand beside her, perhaps a symbolic gesture to reaffirm that she stood by the couple all the way.

Tai did not release the gaze of any of the other eight. He had led the elder DigiDestined through thick and thin and even though Davis had taken the lead of the younger group, the boy still deferred to him when both groups were together. He felt a flash of anger towards all but Davis, especially TK and Matt; who were the root cause of this whole affair. However, he knew he had to let it slide. They were all still his friends, yeah even Matt and he did not wish to lose any of them. Unfortunately, the stakes were high, with him being at risk of losing at least seven. In the end, he chose to answer the question he had dared them to ask. “Yes, Kari and I are in love with each other.”

Even though they had seen Matt’s photo, the majority of the DigiDestined gasped. A silence descended amongst them where only the sound of the passing cars overhead was heard.

After a moment or two, Kari chose to add, “before you ask, this isn’t just some brother/sister complex that we have and are choosing to act out. Tai and I are in love and want to be together long term.”

The collective shock started to dissipate and soon opinions started to be voiced and questions asked.

“The two of you are sick, twisted degenerates,” TK fired.

“How can you be so intolerant?” Mimi shot at the blonde-haired boy. “Ok, sure it’s not conventional, but love is love. You can’t help who it is you fall for.”

On hearing her words of support, Tai gave Mimi a small smile. Of the assembled group, she had been one of the few that he thought might be accepting of his relationship with Kari.

“No, but you can choose not to act on it,” Cody reiterated.

“Obviously you’ve never been in love,” Yolei barked. “Do you know how hard it is to be in love with someone and have to try and suppress those feelings? Kari had to do it for two years and it almost consumed her. If you haven’t forgotten, she fell so far into depression that she lost all her friends.”

“I’m afraid I have to agree with Cody and TK,” everyone turned to look at Ken.

“What!” Yolei yelled, rounding on her boyfriend.

“What Tai and Kari are doing is unnatural,” Ken continued. “Tolerance for same-sex relationships is one thing, but this is incest. Nature doesn’t allow it. For example, brother wolves won’t mate with their sister’s, even if there are no other females.”

“To hell with what nature will and won’t allow, Ken,” Yolei yelled, her fists balled and a look of anger smeared across her face. “We’re not wolves. People fall in love and have free will to chose to be together. Who are we to say who someone can or can’t be with?”

Ken and Yolei quickly devolved into an argument over whether or not incest was acceptable. Meanwhile, Izzy said, “while I don’t think the two of you being in a relationship is a sensible idea, I am interested to know how it came about. How did one of you have the courage to tell the other how they felt?” However, his question was quickly drowned out by the others as they began to weigh into the argument.

As the situation began to intensify, so too did the guilt inside Kari. Without meaning to, she’d caused yet another fight to happen between her friends. Finally, the dam burst inside her and the memories of all the arguments and fights cascaded over her. It was all her fault, all of it. Had she not felt the way she did about Tai, everyone would still be close friends, instead of… Her eyes surveyed the group, people having jumped in on either side of the argument. Cody, TK, Ken and Izzy on one side, Davis, Yolei and Mimi on the other. Only Sora, who was trying but failing to calm people down and Matt, who stood with his back against the wall and looking completely disinterested, had not taken sides. Beside her, Tai had let go of her hand and entered the fray.

Standing alone on the outside, watching most of her friends fighting like this, finally became too much for Kari. Perhaps this had been inevitable. That one day she would be faced with this choice. Stand up and take responsibility for everything that she’d done, or run and hide from it all like she had been doing since the start. She felt the urge to run. To take the easy way out and never look back. Her fists clenched and it took a herculean effort to stay where she was. Running away was what the old Kari would do. But she was not that person anymore. She was stronger now. And, at the very least for her own conscience and sanity, she needed to do this. Taking a deep breath, she yelled over the top of everyone, “STOP IT!”

The entire group fell silent and every head, even Matt’s, turned to stare at her, a mixture of surprise and shock on each face. Kari took another breath to steady herself. “You don’t have to fight each other. I’m the reason you’re all arguing, the reason you all fell out.”

Tai looked at his girlfriend, completely stunned. What was she saying? How could she possibly be trying to take the blame for the divisions that had occurred between the DigiDestined? Eventually, he managed to open his mouth and utter, “Kari, it’s not your…” but was quickly cut off.

“Don’t say it wasn’t my fault, Tai,” Kari said firmly. “This time you don’t get to blindly defend me.” She looked at each and every person in turn. “This all started because of me and the feelings I have for Tai. Two and a half years ago, I found out I was in love with my brother and I panicked. I tried to suppress my feelings, to deny that they existed.” Her gaze fell upon TK. “I tried to fall in love with someone else, with you TK, but it didn’t work. However, when I came to this realization, I was so scared about what it meant for me, that I couldn’t end our relationship. I let it drag on until the point where you made your intentions clear. I knew I would be breaking your heart, but I had no other choice. I couldn’t let it go on any longer. And for that, I will be eternally sorry, TK.”

Kari could still see the hurt, the pain… the anger in TK’s blue eyes. And she half expected him to yell something at her. However, he remained silent. Perhaps taking some twisted pleasure from listening to her confession, or simply being the gentleman she knew him to be and allowing her to continue. Her gaze then fell upon Tai. “You were the next person to be dragged into this mess, Tai. It was my fault TK felt so angry towards me and when you saw us arguing, you blindly leapt to my defence as you always do.” Her eyes found Matt, who met her gaze with the corner of one blue eye. “You did the same thing, Matt. You saw your brother in trouble and immediately jumped in to help.” She received no reaction from the blonde-haired teen, who still looked disinterested in the whole affair.

Kari found Davis next, who gave her a light smile. “Davis, you too had no idea what was going on, but saw a two vs one situation and dived in to aid Tai. I then used you to both get back at TK and as a last hope to deny my feelings. You’re so much like Tai, I thought that maybe it would be enough…”

“Hey, don’t sweat it, Kari,” Davis said, his smile widening. “I’m not that dumb that I didn’t know you wanted to get back at TK. However, it was my choice to go out with you. We had fun together over those few weeks, but by the end, we both knew that we were better off as friends.”

Kari returned the smile before moving on, her eyes shifting to Sora. She met the ginger-haired girl’s gaze but found she could not read those red eyes. After TK, Sora had the most reason to hate her. After all, she’d clawed the girl’s face like she was Gatomon. “I’m so sorry for hurting you, Sora,” she began, desperately trying to convey the sincerity of her words. It seemed that time had mellowed her feelings towards the girl. Though she supposed a large part of that was due to the fact that Sora’s actions had been of benefit to her in the long run. While she might have hurt Tai eighteen months ago, had she not done so, the two of them may have become a happy couple, leaving her alone with her unrequited feelings. “I was emotionally unstable at the time and when I saw how much pain you had caused Tai, by choosing Matt, I couldn’t control myself. Not only did I hurt you, but I solidified the wedge between you, Matt, Tai and myself.” 

She met the gaze of the other five in turn. “Now, because of me and my relationship with Tai, you’ve all taken sides and started arguing with each other.” Kari lowered her head. “I understand if you all want to hate me, I more than deserve it. But please, don’t throw away your friendships with each other because of me.”

Tai could feel the sadness radiating from his girlfriend and immediately stepped forward to put an arm around her. It must have taken a lot of courage for her to stand in front of everyone and shoulder all the blame for each and every fight and division that had occurred between them. Unfortunately, despite what he may wish to think, her testimony had been fairly damning. Nevertheless, he would stand by her, even if everyone else chose to denounce her.

The silence that had descended after Kari finished speaking was eventually broken by the person Kari would have least expected to do so. “I never thought I’d hear you stand up and admit that,” Matt said, finally stepping away from the wall and into the group. “Much less have Tai stand there and not leap in to defend you.”

“That doesn’t make her any less of a bitch,” TK growled, anger still lacing his tone.

“She didn’t do it on purpose!” Davis countered. “She may have been the lit match, but we were the barrels of gunpowder that allowed our fuses to be set alight.”

Everyone turned to stare at Davis, his metaphor actually making sense for once.

“I think the important thing here is that, whether she meant to or not, Kari is clearly sorry for her part in our feuds,” Izzy said, perhaps hoping to avert another argument breaking out, this time over whether Kari should be demonised or not. “And I hope we’re all mature enough to accept her apology and put an end to our arguments.”

Kari had to fight the urge to cry when, one by one, each member of the group muttered some sort of agreement. All accept one. “Thank you,” she whispered, feeling an eighteen-month-old weight finally lift from her shoulders.

“I’ll never forgive you,” TK then spat.

Kari had been prepared for this, expected it if truth be told. After seeing the look in TK’s eyes that morning, she had known that all forgiveness he may have felt towards her since they’d started talking again had been wiped out. She was about to say, I understand, when Yolei fired at the boy, “why? You and Kari have been on good terms for months now and, despite what you might try and argue, you had started to forgive her. Nothing she told you was a lie. The only thing that’s changed is that you now know who she was in love with. Why should that change anything?”

“Because she’s in love with her brother. It’s sick!” TK yelled.

“It’s not sick, it’s just unconventional,” Mimi interjected.

“How can you say it’s ‘unconventional’ with such blasé?” Ken countered.

Ignoring all of this, for the time being, Tai looked Kari straight in the eyes. “Are you ok?” he asked, his voice full of concern.

Kari nodded and gave him a small smile. “I needed to do that and feel better now that I have. You don’t have to worry about me.”

Satisfied that his girlfriend would be alright, Tai returned the smile before turning to face the group. “That’s enough!” he bellowed over the top of everyone in his authoritative tone. As always, it had the desired result of getting everyone to shut up and turn their attention towards him. It was a difficult and unenviable position, he thought. To be both at the centre of the controversy and the one to try and settle matters. However, he had no other choice. “I understand that you all have your own opinions on whether or not what Kari and I are doing is wrong.” He paused to allow his words to sink in. It was hard to appear neutral when you held one of the polar viewpoints. “And if you all want to fight and argue over it like it’s just another piece of gossip, neither of us can stop you. However, you all wanted to know the truth of the matter and we’ve told you; Kari and I are in love and wish to be together.”

Tai took a breath. There was already a clear 4:3 split, with two undeclared, however, he at least had to leave the door open should people change their minds at some point down the road. His gaze caught that of each person in turn when he said, “both Kari and I understand that this might be difficult for you all to accept. But, despite that, we wish to remain friends with everyone, if you’ll have us. If not… we would like to ask that you keep our relationship a secret.” It was a damage control move, he knew that. Thanks to TK, Kari would probably be dogged by rumours that she was a brotherfucker until the end of the year; it not longer. However, it was the group in front of them, their closest friends, that had the greatest potential to spill the beans to their parents.

“Hey, it might be a bit weird, but I’ll always be friends with you guys,” Davis said, metaphorically being the first to step forward.

“You’ve had my support since the start and that’ll never change,” Yolei added.

“I think it’s neat that the two of you are so in love that you want to be together,” Mimi said merrily. “Not to mention you make such a cute couple.”

Well, at least they would still have three friends, Tai thought, although at the same time, braced himself for the impact that he knew was about to come.

Much to his surprise, Izzy then said, “while I stand by what I said earlier, I don’t think what the two of you are doing is sensible, I don’t see why we can’t still be friends.”

However, then came the first denunciation. “I’m sorry, but I just don’t agree with what the two of you are doing,” Cody said firmly.

“I agree,” Ken added. “What the two of you are doing is wrong and needs to stop. If you can’t see that, then someone should tell your parents.”

On hearing this, Yolei suddenly rounded on her boyfriend, “and who’s going to tell them, you?” the venom in her tone was something to behold.

Ken quickly shrank away from her and failed to respond. Only for TK to quickly pick up the baton, “I will.”

Tai watched Yolei, her expression livid, turn to shoot him down, only for another voice to cut through the air, “no you won’t.”

Everyone turned to look at the speaker and Tai knew they were probably all as stunned as he was. It had been Matt.

“What! You can’t tell me what to do,” TK declared defiantly.

“I can when it’s for your own good,” Matt said firmly, his tone icy cold. “I only showed you that damn photo because I thought it might help give you some closure, not so you could poke your nose into something that is none of your business. Besides, if you do anything to harm Tai and Kari’s relationship, my girlfriend will slaughter you…” the last part he spoke under his breath, but Tai still heard it, “…and probably me for telling you.”

“I’m not scared of Teiko,” TK spat indignantly.”

Tai’s mouth fell open as his gaze shifted from younger to older brother. “Teiko? As in Teiko Sato?” he asked in disbelief.

“Yeah, what of it?” Matt replied curtly.

Tai couldn’t help but stare at him. While he’d barely spoken to Teiko recently, he’d not really spoken to anyone because of his studies to be fair, she’d kept that one quiet. “I…” he had been about to say that he didn’t think he was her type and vice versa, when he realised that might not be the case. Teiko would probably enjoy coaxing Matt out of his frosty exterior. While Matt could, if giving the right incentive, be coaxed out. Instead, he said with a chuckle, “have fun.”

Matt gave him a sly smirk, “I do.”

“I’m still not scared of her,” TK reiterated loudly, sounding irritated at having been ignored.

Tai turned to look at the boy at the same time Matt did. “You should be,” they said in unison, before catching each other’s eye, a mutual understanding passing between them.

“You’re not going to get involved, TK,” Matt then reaffirmed.

The two brother’s locked gazes, but the outcome was inevitable; TK folded. “Fine,” he spat bitterly, “I’ll keep your disgusting secret,” he turned and stared directly into Kari’s reddish-brown eyes, “but I’m not doing it for you. As far as I’m concerned, I don’t want anything to do with you ever again.”

“Are we in agreement then?” Sora then said, drawing everyone’s attention. “We’ll all keep Tai and Kari’s secret, despite what our different views on their relationship might be.”

It came as somewhat of a surprise, albeit a welcome one, to both Tai and Kari when everyone in the group confirmed their agreement. Although it was clear that certain individuals did so grudgingly. However, a final score of five still willing to be friends with them, three firmly against and… whatever Matt’s actual opinion was, should probably be considered a better result than either of them could have hoped for.

“Thank you,” Tai and Kari said as one.

“Yeah, whatever,” Matt grunted, once more sounding disinterested. “Now, if we’re all done here, I’ve got places to be.”

“Say hi to Teiko for us,” Kari said.

A smirk flashed across Matt’s face so quick it could easily have been missed as he turned away. “If she finds out I saw her new favourite couple and didn’t tell her, I won’t hear the end of it.” With that, he walked away along the waterfront.

The others started making their goodbyes, Cody, TK and Ken noticeably blanking Tai and Kari; the latter much to Yolei’s chagrin. There was going to be further arguments between the two of them. Of that much Kari was certain.

When the group dissipated, only Sora remained. She stepped forward, a smile on her face but a faint sadness in her eyes. Those red orbs then met Tai’s chocolate browns. “The two of you split up, then got back together,” she said, it was not a question.

“Yeah,” Tai confirmed anyway. “We thought it would be for the best, but then realised that we couldn’t be without one another. I’m sorry, Sora,” he added.

“Don’t be,” Sora replied. “I had my chance to be with you and I missed it. I hope the two of you are happy together.” She then turned and looked at Kari. “Take care of him.”

“I will,” Kari assured her. “You’ll find someone that makes you happy Sora, I just know it.”

With a polite nod of her head, the ginger-haired girl turned and headed up the stairs, leaving Tai and Kari alone.

A moment passed before either spoke. Eventually, Tai said, “that probably went better than I could ever have imagined. And I can’t believe Matt.”

“Yeah,” Kari replied, the blonde-haired teen’s actions had surprised her too. “And he’s dating Teiko.”

They both laughed.

“Shall we head for home?” Tai then asked.

“I suppose we don’t have much choice. We’re going to have to face mom sooner or later.”

They joined hands as they set foot on the stairs and started to ascend back to street level. In hindsight, the battle they had just fought would probably pale in comparison to the one they faced when they got home.


	73. Pt5 Epilogue: The messenger

**Part Five: A Secret Exposed**

**Epilogue: The messenger**

Yuuko Kamiya was worried. No, scratch that, she had been worried since she received the first phone call. Now she was extremely worried, concerned and… angry. Just after lunchtime, someone from Odaiba Middle School had called to enquire why Kari had not shown up that morning. She’d immediately called her daughter, but gotten no reply. Messages, both voice and text had been left, but those too had gone unanswered. Then, while she had been pacing the apartment in a vain effort to try and decide what to do, the second call had come. This one had been from Odaiba High School, to ask why her son had been seen sprinting from the premises at the end of morning break. A barrage of calls and texts had then been sent to Tai, but he had remained as silent as his sister. Her instant reaction had been to blame her son for skipping school and encouraging Kari to do the same, however, the rational part of her brain eventually told her that, for once, Tai was not likely at fault. No, he had at least gone to school and been there until the morning break, whereas Kari hadn’t gone at all. Whatever had transpired, it had been her daughter that had drawn her son out of school.

With a hell of a lot more force than was necessary, Yuuko furiously sliced the carrots on her chopping board. Unable to do anything else, she had been forced to continue with her daily routine, wait and worry. A piece of carrot pinged forward as the knife came down upon it like a guillotine blade, ricocheted off a simmering pot on the stove and caught the back of her knife-hand. The blade slipped and almost took the tip off one of her fingers. She tossed the knife down in annoyance; leaving the last carrot half sliced. Her eyes drifted for the hundredth time to the clock on the over; 6:34 pm. Where on earth could her children… her ears pricked up as she heard the sound of the front door parting company with the frame. Hurriedly, Yuuko stepped out from behind the kitchen counter, eyes falling upon the two figures that crossed the threshold. A breath that she had been holding since the first phone call escaped from her mouth; they were safe. She watched her children take off their coats and exchange their outdoor shoes for indoor ones. Apart from the fact that Kari looked a little pale, she could detect nothing wrong with either.

When your kids had faced mortal peril on multiple occasions, you couldn’t help but fear the worst. So, when something like this happens and you see that neither is hurt, there is naturally a feeling of relief. It was exactly that feeling that washed over Yuuko as she observed them. However, hand in hand with the aforementioned relief came anger. Anger that your children had, for all intents and purposes, disappeared and ignored all attempts to contact them. For normal children, it would be considered downright rude. When your children were DigiDestined, it was nothing short of thoughtless and selfish.

Yuuko strode forward and stood, hands on hips, as her children finally met her gaze. “Where have the two of you been!” she demanded. Try as she might, she could not contain her furry. “I’ve been worried sick all day about the pair of you!”

Both children struggled to meet her gaze. Eventually and somewhat uncharacteristically, it was Kari who spoke. “We’re sorry, Mom,” she said softly, “it was all my fault.”

This caught Yuuko off guard. Normally in these situations, Tai would throw himself between her and his sister and take the brunt of her wrath. Perhaps on this occasion, he knew that she would have a grasp on events, thanks to their respective schools, before either of them opened their mouths. Against tradition, her gaze zeroed in on Kari. “Explain yourself, young Lady.”

“TK found out about Takato,” Kari said solemnly. “He came into homeroom and started yelling at me as though we'd only broken up yesterday.” Her daughters head lowered and Yuuko wondered if she was fighting to hold back tears. “It was horrible, Mom... and I just had to get out. Before I knew it, I'd run out of school and was wandering the streets.”

Yuuko surveyed her daughter. She could remember full well, the state she had been in after her breakup with TK and then again only a few weeks ago after she and this Takato boy had agreed to mutually end things. She sighed internally. It had seemed since the new year, that Kari had finally started to get over the loss of her boyfriend. However, she could detect that the morning’s events had nearly derailed the healing process. She turned her gaze onto her son, who stared back at her. “I take it this is where you come in?” she asked, though already knew the answer. Kari had alerted her brother to the fact something was wrong and he'd come running.

Her son nodded. “I got a message from her at morning break. Mom, she was alone in the park. It’s snowing outside and she was asking for help. I couldn't just leave her.”

It cut Yuuko fairly deep, that Tai was Kari's immediate go-to whenever she was in trouble. Naturally, she'd tried to deny it. To convince herself that she was to blame for her daughter constantly running to her brother, rather than to herself when she needed emotional help or support. And for a time, she had succumbed to the belief that she had failed as a mother. In the end, she had been forced to accept the truth, that Tai knew Kari better than she did and would always be her daughters go-to, or drive herself mad trying to figure out where she had gone wrong. “You should have contacted me!” she then said, feeling her temper begin to boil again. Despite Tai’s good intentions, there was no excuse for not telling her that they were ok.

“Sorry, Mom, ”her son said apologetic, “but I forgot to charge my phone last night. It died before I actually found her.”

Yuuko's gaze flashed between her children, a look of outrage on her face. “Either of you could have used Kari's phone!” Something was amiss here, but it did not seem like either of her children were going to tell her the truth. If they had already elected to close ranks, there was little she could do to force them into talking. “Both of you go to your room’s. The pair of you are grounded until further notice.”

Without comment or complaint, both of her children headed down the hallway and towards their respective bedrooms. Given that, at present, neither Tai nor Kari had been going out much, her punishment was hardly severe. However, there was little else she could do, save for perhaps withholding their allowance's or, in Kari's case, confiscating her headphones. If she were lucky, she might be able to coax some semblance of the truth from one or the other at a later date. Still fuming, she returned to the kitchen and her half-finished dinner.

##

Dinner that night had been a quiet, albeit slightly frosty affair. And, unfortunately, just another instance of her husband sitting down and not knowing what had happened, but that something had. After it had ended, both Tai and Kari had returned to their respective rooms. However, she was sure she'd heard Kari sneak across to her brother's while she had been in the bathroom. She'd made the executive decision to leave them to it, whatever it happened to be; probably a video game of some sort. In hindsight, being confined to their bedrooms with access to mobile phones, laptops and video games, was not the same punishment that it had been when they had been younger. In fact, they spent the bulk of their time in their respective bedrooms anyway. She shook her head. It was a little late in the day to be changing her parenting strategy, especially in Tai's case. In two months time, he would be off to University; assuming a favourable result on his entrance exam. She shook her head. Where had the time gone? She could still recall with perfect clarity, changing his diapers; the smell in particular.

Pulling herself out of her musings, Yuuko looked over from above the top of her book at her husband; he was engrossed in a recording of a soccer match. She smiled to herself. In a few short years, it would most likely be just the two of them. Perhaps it was time for them to start thinking about what they wanted to do after Tai and Kari had both left the nest. Finding her place once more, she started to read, only for the sound of the telephone to stop her mid-sentence. She looked up once more and saw her husband had not appeared to have blinked; men!

“I’ll get it,” she said, though she doubted he could hear her any more than he could the telephone.

Crossing the main living area, Yuuko lifted the recover. “Kamiya residence, Yuuko speaking.”

“Mrs Kamiya,” the voice was muffled, although she could still make out the words.

“Who is this?” Yuuko asked suspiciously.

“That’s not important. There is something I need to tell you, so I need you to listen.”

“Is this some sort of prank? Who are you?” she reiterated.

“I’m sorry, but it’s best if you don’t know. Unfortunately, I have something to tell you, but you’re not going to like what I have to say.”

Yuuko was about to yell at the caller to stop being childish, but stopped when they said, “it’s about Tai and Kari.”

“What about them?” she found herself asking, the memory of her suspicions from earlier coming to the fore once more. “Are you one of their friends?”

There was a pause for a moment before the caller said, “…yes. That’s why I need you to listen. Although you are not going to like what I have to say.”

On receiving confirmation that the caller was a friend of her children, Yuuko immediately began running names and voices through her head but found no match. The caller had sufficiently muffled their voice, making it impossible for her to identify them. Instead, she said, “I’m listening.”

“We all met with Tai and Kari this evening, where they confirmed a rumour that started circulating amongst us earlier in the day… the reason Kari ran from school.”

“Tell me,” Yuuko said quietly. While the caller had already forewarned her, she now had a distinct impression that she was not going to like what they were about to say.

“Again, my apologies, but you are not going to like this.” The caller paused before then saying, “Tai and Kari are involved in an incestuous relationship.”

Yuuko almost dropped the receiver on hearing the caller’s words. Whatever she had expected to hear, that had not been it. Memories of seeing her children together flashed through her mind as the shock took hold. The very idea of Tai and Kari, her own children, involved in such a relationship made her sick to her stomach. Inside her head, she began to see recent images of the pair together, her mind scouring them for any hint that what the caller had said could be true. As the initial shock began to dissipate, it was immediately replaced by one feeling; denial. It could not be true… No, it was not true! Her children were not involved in something so… so abhorrent!

“How dare you even suggest such a thing,” Yuuko barked. “If this is supposed to be a joke, it’s not funny!”

“It’s no joke, Mrs Kamiya… I wish it was,” the caller said firmly, clearly unfazed by her words.

“Whoever you are, you need to learn some serious respect and decency,” Yuuko yelled, as she tried to block unwanted images of her children kissing from her mind. “Goodbye!”

She moved the phone away from her ear to hang it up, but still caught the caller’s last words, “watch your children, Mrs Kamiya. Watch them carefully and you’ll see the truth…”

Yuuko hung up the phone in outrage. Turning back to face the room, she saw her husband staring at her from the sofa. “What was that all about?” he asked, beckoning her to come back over and sit down.

“Nothing,” she snapped, unable to fully reign in her outrage. She walked back over towards the couch and sat down. “Nothing,” she then repeated calmly, “just some stupid prank call, that’s all.”

Her husband furrowed his brow but elected not to ask any further questions. “As long as you’re ok,” he said, before returning to his soccer game.

Yuuko did not answer. Instead, she picked up her book and found her place from earlier. However, try as she might, she could hear the caller’s words whisper from the furthest reaches of her mind, _“Tai and Kari are involved in an incestuous relationship.” _Little did she know, that in the quiet moments of the days to come, those words were going to haunt her.


	74. Pt6 01) Asault...

**Part Six: Secret No Longer**

**Chapter One: Assault… **

The week that followed the public outing of her relationship with her brother, had been the hardest of Kari Kamiya’s school life thus far. The day after the event, whispers had followed her whenever she neared any of her classmates. Things like, _“is she really sleeping with her brother?” _and _“I heard she’s been fucking her brother for two years now, the dirty little slut,” _had been just some of the choice phrases that had reached her ears that morning. By lunchtime, she’d had several notes passed and one thrown at her in class, which said things like, _“brotherfucker” _and _“brother fucking whore.” _Come lunchtime, she had actually left the school grounds and went to a coffee shop, just to get away from it for an hour. Unfortunately, after her brief respite, things only to get worse. Crossing the school grounds on her way back inside had seen several snowballs pelted at her; one of which hit her right cheek and stung like a bitch. The whispers had intensified and it quickly became apparent that the gossip had spread throughout the school like electricity through water. Back in class and she had been forced to endure several more notes being thrown at her. Resulting in her leaving the school the moment the chime to signal the end of the day rang.

That night she had spoken to Tai about it, but they both knew there was nothing either of them could do. Her boyfriend could not come to school to protect her and telling any of the teachers would result in too many awkward questions and most likely a phone call home. Ultimately, as much as it sucked, Kari could do nothing but hope things settled down. Only come the next day, it seemed that was not likely to happen. Instead of whispers, Wednesday had brought with it a barrage of people yelling insults at her wherever she went. Outside, it was snowballs. And people deliberately barged into her or tried to trip her up in the corridors. However, worst had been at lunchtime, when someone spat in her face and at the end of the day, when a wad of gum had been launched at her and caught in her hair. Yolei had managed to shepherd her away to a bathroom before anyone else had the chance to do something to her, but had been forced to cut the gum out of her hair.

Come Thursday, Davis and Yolei had taken it upon themselves to act as her bodyguards. Everywhere she went, the pair ensured they were on hand to try and block any missiles thrown at her, yell insults back at those who directed those at her and to ensure that no one got close enough to her so they could hit or spit at her again. It had been a gruelling day for all three, especially Davis, who had taken several snowballs to the head for her.

It was now Friday and the with the weekend within touching distance, Kari could not wait. It was a faint hope that things would die down by Monday, but she desperately needed the two days away from it all. Like yesterday, Davis and Yolei had been escorting her everywhere. The former had actually had a stroke of genius overnight and bought a plastic toy used to throw tennis balls for dogs. With ease, he had used it to scoop up snow and launch it at anyone who tried to pelt her with snowballs. It had sent them running, however, Kari could not help but fear that the perpetrators would copy his idea come Monday.

When the day finally drew to a close, Kari deliberately took as long as possible to pack away her things. Carefully she watched the rest of her classmates leave the room. Davis had soccer practice and Yolei an unscheduled meeting of the computer club, meaning she would be on her own to navigate a safe route to the bike racks. She waited, pretending to check her homework planner as the last few students left. When the room finally emptied, she stayed put. Even though it was Friday, people may still be lingering in the corridors, she reasoned. Her eyes drifted to the wall clock and she gave it another full five minutes before even venturing to the door. Tentatively, as though peaking over the top of a world-war-one trench, Kari looked out into the corridor; deserted. She let out a low sigh of relief and crossed the threshold. Slowly she began making her way towards her locker, eyes scanning all around in search of someone lurking in the empty classrooms. Her heart skipped a beat when she discovered one that was in use by an after school club; she didn’t know which one. So worried that someone might look out a window and see her, she crouched down low until she had safely made it past. Had the situation not been so serious, she probably would have laughed, given that it reminded her of when they had snuck into their elementary school to get to the Digiport.

Turning the corner into another empty hallway, Kari’s locker came into view. She let out a low breath as she walked towards it. She had been convinced that a group of people would have been gathered around it, waiting to accost her. To her left, she heard the sound of a door opening. Her gaze had not even reached the outer edge of the frame when she heard someone yell, “it’s her!”

Before Kari knew what was happening, a pair of girls darted out of the bathroom, seized her by the arms and dragged her inside. Instinctively, she fought against them, but the second she crossed the threshold, more hands grabbed at her. “Let go of me!” she yelled frantically, only to have a wad of material roughly shoved into her mouth. She tried to spit it out but quickly felt the gag being tied off behind her head. Next second, she felt a sharp kick in the back of her knees, which instantly buckled. Helplessly, Kari clattered down onto the floor. For a few sharp, erratic heartbeats, she lay winded on the hard, cold tiles, before two pairs of arms pulled her up onto her knees. The sudden down-up motion made her feel slightly dizzy. Vision blurring for a moment, her head slumped as she tried to take in a breath through the cloth gag. She was vaguely aware of her hands being bound behind her back, though it did not result in her being released by the two pairs of hands. Just as she began to make out several pairs of feet, a hand slapped her across the face.

Kari felt an immediate sting in her cheek, as a voice she recognised as belonging to one of her classmates, Hitana, said, in a harsh voice, “you’d better not pass out on us, Bitch.” Her eyes immediately re-focused and she raised her head to see a group of six girls gathered around her; all from her year. Their number increased to eight when counting the two that held her. The lead girl spoke again, “good, seems we’ve got your attention.”

Kari growled into her gag as she struggled against the arms that held her, but it was more of a token show of resistance than anything else; the girls' grips remaining firm. “Wah doh yoh wahnt wif meh?” she demanded in a muffled tone, even though she already knew.

“These rumours that have been circulating about you, we don’t like them. That is to say, we find the idea of you fucking your brother to be disgusting. Hence, to dispel any doubt, we thought we’d get the truth from you,” Hitana said sharply. “So, Kari, no bullshit, just one simple question. Are you fucking your brother?”

Kari met the gaze of each girl in turn but found not a shred of pity. A prickling sensation began to nip at the corners of her eyes as she struggled to hold back tears. She and Tai had talked about what she should say if anyone directly asked her if they were involved with each other and they had agreed that the best option would be to deny it. Only, like with TK on Monday, she found she could not do it. Her relationship with Tai was a fundamental part of her. To denounce it would be to denounce herself. Besides, it did not matter. The actions of these girls already told her that, even if she were innocent, they would not care. None of them were interested in the truth. They just wanted to find a new victim to torment. Kari took a deep breath in through her nose. She’d not imagined this when thinking about the prejudice she might face when her relationship with her brother became public knowledge. However, whatever these girls planned to do to her, she would take on the chin. For she had no intention of denouncing Tai, just to try and save her own skin. Defiantly, she met Hitana’s gaze and said as firmly as she could, “yes!”

A look of shock spread across every face at her admission of guilt. And Kari knew that not one of them had expected her to do so. She was about to lose the war, but in that brief moment, she savoured her victory. Then the insults began to fly.

“Freak!”

“Whore!”

“Degenerate!”

“Brotherfucker!”

Kari tried to tune it out. It did not matter what these girls said or did, she was in love with Tai and would endure any torment they could throw at her. She yelped when she felt a hand roughly grab her hair so that she was forced to look forward. In turn, each of the girls stepped forwards and spat in her face. I will not give them the satisfaction of tears, she thought defiantly, as she felt wad after wad of warm spit hit her skin. In unison, she then received one on each cheek from the two girls that held her.

“Has anyone got a marker pen?” she then heard Hitana ask her comrades.

The sound of rummaging followed before someone said, “here.”

Through eyes blurred by spit, Kari saw one of the girls hand the pen over, before Hitana commanded, “take her blouse off.”

Kari struggled furiously as two of the other girls eagerly stepped forward and grabbed the bottom of her blouse. It was a futile effort and soon they had roughly pulled it, sailor collar and all, over her head and down her arms until it bunched at her bound wrists. Hitana strode forward, the sound of the pen being uncapped ringing in Kari’s ears. She felt the soft, damp tip of the marker touch the skin on her chest, just above her breasts, as the girl wrote the word, ‘brotherfucker’. She received a second wave of spit, this time aimed at her chest before she was roughly shoved to the floor.

“We’ll see you on Monday, Brotherfucker,” Hitana laughed in a cold, high pitched tone, as Kari heard the bathroom door open. “If you’re lucky, maybe we’ll decide to write it on your face. That way the whole world can find out what a degenerate whore you are.”

Hastily, she rolled over and saw the girls file out of the bathroom. Shit! They’re leaving me like this, she thought desperately as she frantically began to struggle against her bonds. It took a minute or two for her to calm down enough to think rationally and stop. Ok, she breathed heavily through the wad of cloth that still filled her mouth. If I struggle, I’ll only make things worse. With difficulty, Kari shifted herself onto her bum and sat up. Unfortunately, with her blouse bunched up around her wrists, it was difficult for her fingers to find the knot in the material that bound them; crap! She was going to have to see it in order to get free.

Kari was in the process of struggling to shift her wrists beneath her bum when she heard the sound of the door opening. Her eyes immediately snapped over to it in fear. She didn’t want anyone to see her like this. Or, worse, have them decide to do something else to her. However, the next thing she heard was a familiar voice yell, “oh shit!” followed quickly by, “everyone, stay out here.”

Through her spit obscured vision, Kari saw a blur of lavender rush towards her. “Oh, Kari!” Yolei exclaimed as she knelt down beside her, “I’m so sorry. I knew I should have taken you with me.”

Kari had no idea what her friend was talking about and did not care. She was just relieved that it had been Yolei that had found her. It did not take long for her friend to free her wrists. Wriggling out of her blouse, Kari wiped her eyes and stood up. “Thank you,” she said softly as gratitude washed over her.

“Kari, I’m so sorry,” Yolei said again as she pulled her into a hug.

It was in that moment, within the embrace of her best friend, that her resolve finally broke and the tears began to flow.

“It’s going to be ok, Kari. It’s over and I’m going to make sure nothing like this ever happens to you again.”

“How,” Kari whispered, as she allowed the lavender-haired girl to lead her over to the sink.

Yolei grabbed some paper towels and began the wash the spit off of her. “You’ll see,” she said with a dollop of pride in her voice.

She allowed the other girl to wash and dry her face and chest. Unfortunately, there was nothing to be done for the permanent marker that had been used to scrawl brotherfucker on her. That would require a shower and some serious scrubbing. The skin on her chest would probably be red raw by the time she got it all off. Once she had redressed, Yolei gave her a serious look.

“Who did this?” her friend asked firmly.

“It doesn’t matter,” Kari whispered as she broke eye contact, “I can’t report them.”

“I know that. If you report them, the teachers will ask too many questions and your mom will get called in. However, that doesn’t mean that we’re going to let them get away with it. They just assaulted you, Kari.” Yolei placed her hands on her hips, a no-nonsense expression on her face. “I want the names, now.”

One look at her best friend and she caved, rattling off the names of the eight girls that had accosted her. When she finished, Kari then said, in a rather deflated tone, “if by we, you mean yourself and Davis, then please don’t. The two of you have already defended me enough this week and are outnumbered four to one at best. I couldn’t bear it if something was to happen to either of you because of me.”

Yolei gave her a warm, knowing smile, “trust me, we’re not outnumbered.”

A blank expression formed on Kari’s face. What on earth was her best friend talking about?

She felt the other girl take her by the hand as she said, “come and see.”

Not having much say in the matter, Kari allowed herself to be dragged from the bathroom. Her eyes widened when Yolei opened the door and shooed her out. Gathered in the corridor was a group of no less than a dozen students from across the year groups; a mix of both boys and girls. “Yolei, what’s going on?” she asked nervously, images of what had just happened to her flashing through her mind.

“These are a group of open-minded people who, like me, believe that love is love,” Yolei said proudly.

Kari’s gaze met that of each of the assembled students and she received a warm smile from all; she knew most of them.

“As of this evening, we’re officially the Society for the Promotion of Equality and Tolerance or S.P.E.T. for short. We exist to fight prejudice in all its forms and offer support to anyone who needs it.” Yolei gave her a wide grin. “Unofficially, you can think of us as your fan club and bodyguards. We’re here to protect you and, if needs be, fight back against any close-minded bigots that might try to hurt you.”

Kari had no idea what to say, such was the unbelievability of what her best friend had just said. How had Yolei managed to convince over a dozen people to not only support her but to form a club and willingly offer to protect her? She looked at her friend, mouth agape. So many questions burst through her mind that all she managed to say was snippets of each, “how did… when… why…”

“I knew you would face this kind of abuse the moment TK confirmed that you were in a relationship with Tai. So, I’ve been working all week to bring together people who support what you’re doing.” Yolei paused and lowered her gaze slightly. “I’d hoped to get the group organised before something like what just happened this evening occurred. I’m sorry, Kari. I should have gone with my gut and taken you with us when we went to see the principle to get the club ratified.”

“You don’t have to apologise for anything, Yolei,” Kari said softly. She then turned to look at the assembled group. “I’m truly grateful for your support, but I can’t ask any of you to put yourselves in danger just to try and protect me.”

“You don’t have to ask us, Kari,” one said.

“Yeah, we’re all willing to do it because we believe in your relationship with Tai,” said another.

A tidal wave of agreements and kind words followed and Kari felt completely overwhelmed. Never in her wildest daydreams could she have imagined that, alongside the expected backlash from people who would think her a degenerate, she would find anyone, let alone more than a dozen individuals, who would be in support of her. It rendered her completely speechless.

From the front of the group, Yolei gave her another grin. “Sorry, Kari, but you’re stuck with us. Until this blows over, members of S.P.E.T. will be with you to ensure no one tries to hurt you.”

The warmth and support that Kari could feel radiating from the crowd, coupled with the overwhelming sense of gratitude, became too much for her to bear and she dissolved into a flood of tears. “Thank you,” she whispered as Yolei pulled her into a hug.

“We’re here for you, Kari,” The lavender-haired girl said as she released her.

It was perhaps the most moving thing Kari had ever experienced when, one by one, every mender of the group stepped forwards and like Yolei, gave her a hug. It filled her with a newfound strength, which told her that, despite the obstacles and challenges they would face, she and Tai could make it. They would just have to stay the course. 


	75. Pt6 02) ...and Battery

**Part Six: Secret No Longer**

**Chapter Two: …and Battery **

Thank fuck it was Friday. No, scratch that. Thank fuck it was Friday and that he only had one week left of high school, ever, Tai thought as he started packing away his things. While on Tuesday he had been spared the same whisperings and rumours chasing him throughout the school that Kari had suffered, it had caught up with him on Wednesday. He did not know how exactly, given that he and his girlfriend attended different schools, but he suspected that some of his peers had caught wind of it from siblings who went to Odaiba Middle School. That, or Matt had decided to fuck with him; he still did not know where he stood with the blonde-haired teen. Regardless, by the end of the day on Wednesday, the rumour mill was in overdrive and people had started to talk behind his back. Come Thursday morning and he’d received his first ‘sisterfucker’ note in class and had one brave soul yell it at him in the corridor. He’d grabbed the boy and pinned him to the wall, ready to punch him, before Sora and Mimi dragged him away. He’d sat with them plus Izzy at lunch and while the girls had been sympathetic, Izzy had taken more of a, what did you expect, stance. Thursday and today had been more of the same.

Tai sighed as he picked up his bag. He’d spoken to Kari every night, however, had the distinct impression that a) she was receiving a lot more shit than he was and b) she was not telling him everything. The small section of her hair that looked two inches shorter than the rest being the giveaway. He’d been forced to suppress his big brother side in order to not ask about it. Whatever had happened, she had clearly not wanted to talk about it. As he walked out of the room, he pondered whether he should race into town, catch Iowa before he closed and buy her a new CD. Except he was supposed to be grounded after Monday’s escapade. He thought for a moment as he headed for the main exit. Yes, his mom would probably go nuclear at him for not coming straight home from school. But what else could she really do to him? While she could confiscate his phone and laptop, she couldn’t exactly remove everything entertaining from his bedroom. And Kari could really use a pick-me-up. By the time he was halfway towards the bike racks, he’d made up his mind, his mom could yell at him all she wanted.

Tai had just located his bike and was about to unlock it, when a familiar voice called out to him, “hey, Tai.”

He looked up and saw one of his soccer buddies run towards him. “Hey, Hiroshi,” he said, giving the boy a relieved smile. He’d half expected it to be someone else about to chance calling him a sisterfucker. “What’s up?”

The boy returned the smile, “can you do me a favour?”

Tai checked the time on his phone before replying, “sure if it’s quick. I need to head into town.”

“It’ll just take two minutes, promise,” Hiroshi said.

He rolled his eyes, “fine, but if it takes any longer, I’m gone, ok. Now, what is it.”

The other boy headed off in the direction of the playing fields as he said, “I accidentally kicked a soccer ball into the roof of the equipment shed. I need someone to boost me up there so I can get it down before Coach finds out and skins me.”

Tai shook his head. Every couple of weeks, one of the team did the same thing and had to have another help him onto the roof to retrieve it. In fact, so plausible was the story, that he did not stop to question why Hiroshi had been kicking a ball outside in the snow. They reached the equipment shed and without thinking, Tai followed the boy around to the back. Where his eyes immediately caught sight of three waiting figures; all from the soccer team.

“What the…” was all he managed to utter before two of them grabbed him and shoved him up against the cold, damp wall. Immediately he fought back against them and had managed to shake one of them off, only to receive a punch in the gut from one of the others. Momentarily winded, he struggled for breath as the boy whose grip he had shaken free of grabbed him once more.

“We’ll keep this simple, Kamiya, are you fucking your sister?” Hiroshi said, the friendliness gone from his tone.

Anger raged inside Tai like an untampered fire. He was angry at himself for having fallen for the ruse, at Hiroshi and the others for having turned on him and at the fact he couldn’t openly be with Kari without facing persecution. And while he remembered the agreement he and his girlfriend had come to regarding denying any and all rumours, his anger at the situation prevented him from doing so. Thus, instead of simply saying no and hoping that would bring an end to the matter he looked Hiroshi directly in the eyes and growled, “so what if I am?” It was the wrong answer. No sooner had the last word passed through his gritted teeth, he received a second punch in the gut. Apparently, defiance was an admission of guilt.

“You’re fucking sick, Kamiya,” the second boy yelled at him as he too threw a punch. This one caught him across the jaw and twisted his neck around.

Tai felt the taste of blood come from his lips and he quickly found the small rupture on the lower one with his tongue. He spat it out before saying, “I’d much rather sleep with my sister come girlfriend than either of yours, Toshi.”

There, he’d fully admitted it. If they were going to beat the shit out of him, then at least he’d go down knowing that he had been true to Kari and to himself. He could see the rage spread across the boy whose sister and girlfriend he had just insulted and he braced himself for the impending next blow. Only before it came, a voice shouted out, “hey, leave him alone.”

Tai could not believe his ears. He, along with the other four boys turned their heads to his right. It was Matt.

“This doesn’t concern you, Ishida, now back off,” Hiroshi said threateningly.

“Huh, you really think that guys that need a 4v1 situation to beat someone up scare me?” Matt snorted. “You guys make me sick. Now, why don’t you let Tai go and we’ll all forget this ever happened.”

“No way, Ishida!”

A smirk formed on Matt’s lips, “I hoped you were going to say that.”

Next second Tai saw Matt dart forward and catch Hiroshi with a blow to the face. The boy staggered backwards and collided with his comrade. Instinctively, the two that held him released their respective grips in order to defend themselves from Matt’s impending attack. And Tai was ready for them. The second he had his right arm free, he hooked the boy who had held his opposite side straight in the face. A flurry of fists quickly ensued, in which he took a blow to his chest, but dished out several to two of his opponents. However, soon Hiroshi saw he had bitten off more than he could chew and ran for it. The others, on seeing him go, quickly followed suit.

Cowards, Tai thought as he spat out another mouthful of blood. He finally met Matt’s gaze. “Thanks,” he said through a laboured breath and he winced.

“You’re just lucky I was passing and despise a group ganging up on one person,” Matt said indifferently. He gave Tai a roving look. “You hurt?”

“Nah, I’m g…” he took a step forward and winced again, “argh!” He grabbed at his side, staggered and thought he was about to fall over when his shoulder met with the other boy’s hand. He managed to straighten himself.

“You always were a stubborn asshole,” Matt said, removing his hand. Tai received another intense stare, before the blonde-haired teen added, “come on, I’ll give you a ride home.”

Tai took another step, grimaced, but kept himself on his feet of his own accord. His abdomen and ribs hurt like hell. The idea of accepting charity from Matt burned him inside. And that was after the boy had just saved him from a far more intense pounding. However, the thought of having to cycle home in his present condition was worse. Not to mention potentially dangerous. Should he move in a certain way, he might receive a spike of pain that could cause him to crash. A grudging expression covered his face when he said, “fine.”

Matt snorted and Tai was surprised not to hear any smugness in his tone when he replied, “let’s go then.”

He followed the blonde-haired teen out from behind the equipment shed and was silently grateful that Matt kept a slow pace. Each step still hurting and causing him to wince; he’d possibly broken a rib. He’d probably need Kari to patch him up once he got home. When they passed the bike sheds, he glanced at his still parked bicycle. Leaving it would force him to walk on Monday morning, as being grounded would require him to ask his mom to be allowed to come and pick it up and that would require an explanation as to why he left it in the first place.

They reached the parking lot and Matt started up his moped. “Hop on,” he said.

Tai climbed on behind him and took hold of side handles. If it was not for the fact that cycling contributed a good portion to his weekly workout, he wouldn’t mind getting a moped of his own. It would certainly make getting around a lot quicker and he would be able to take Kari on the back. She’d probably enjoy it too. An image of his girlfriend in biker leathers filled his mind and he quickly found that focusing on it helped to dull the pain. He closed his eyes and let his imagination run wild for the duration of the trip.

##

“Ok, you can get off now… Yo, earth to Tai. You can get off.”

Tai’s eyes snapped open when Matt’s slightly irate voice cut through his daydreams of Kari. He blinked a few times as he took in his surroundings. They were outside his apartment building. He audibly winced when he climbed off the back of the moped. The stairs were going to be an absolute bastard to climb by himself. However, he couldn’t stomach the idea of asking Matt for any further help.

Fortunately, he did not have to as a voice from behind him called out, “Tai.”

A smile formed on his slightly swollen lips as he turned around to see his girlfriend approach; Yolei walking beside her. “Hey, Kari,” he replied.

The second she came close enough to properly make out her boyfriend’s features, Kari knew something had happened. There was a bruise forming on one of his cheeks and his lip was burst. She looked him up and down. He was standing awkwardly too and she could see in his chocolate eyes that he was in some sort of pain. It seemed that things had come to a head at school for him too. She rushed towards him. “Tai, what happened,” she asked, gently wrapping her arms around him.

Tai reciprocated the hug and said, “it’s nothing, I just fell, that’s all.”

“Try got cornered by four of his soccer buddies who started to beat the crap out of him before I showed up,” Matt said firmly.

Tai turned and scowled darkly at the blonde-haired teen. Damn him for telling Kari the truth! Now she would worry about him when she needed to be worrying about herself.

Kari glanced around her boyfriend’s shoulder, only now properly registering that the fact that Matt was here and had clearly given Tai a lift home. “Thank you for helping him out and for bringing him home, Matt,” she said gratefully, before glaring at her boyfriend. “Did you really expect me to believe that you fell?”

Tai quickly buckled under the intensity of Kari’s stare. “I didn’t want you to worry about me when you’ve had it far worse this week,” he admitted, before adding, “besides, you didn’t tell me what happened to your hair.”

She sighed and released his gaze, “I suppose not.”

“Make sure she tells you what happened today,” Yolei then said to Tai. “However, just don’t lose your shit over it. I’ve got a handle on the situation, so it won’t happen again, I promise.”

It was Kari’s turn to scowl at her companion. Given that she had no visible sign from her ordeal, save the marker pen that was hidden underneath her blouse, she had hoped not to worry Tai with details of what had happened to her. Now it seemed like both of them had unpleasant stories to tell. She met her boyfriend’s gaze once more. “We can talk inside while I patch you up.”

Tai nodded, “ok,” then laughed slightly. “I guess this should teach us not to keep secrets from one another.”

“Yeah, well, if you guys are done learning life lessons, I’m out of here,” Matt then said.

Tai turned and looked at his friend. While he still maintained a cold exterior, Matt had changed. It seemed that being with Teiko had tempered him somewhat and even though he was not openly admitting it, his disposition towards him had changed. Their two interactions at the end of last year had quickly become hostile, even when he had tried to be diplomatic, at least in the first instance. And Tai knew that neither he nor Matt would have been inclined to lift a finger to help the other at that point. Yet Matt had done just that. Maybe it was time he dropped his end of the bone.

Releasing his grip on Kari, Tai turned and stepped towards the moped and its rider. “Hey, Matt,” he said calmly, “thanks for helping me out. I really appreciate it.” He paused and felt the grip he had held on his anger towards the boy for eighteen months finally release. “I’m sorry for what happened between us, TK and Davis. And for being an ass towards you since.”

Matt let out a snort of laughter, “yeah, you were an ass, but so was I. Like Davis said, Kari might have been the lit match, but we were all the barrels of gunpowder that allowed our fuses to be lit. I guess I’m sorry too.”

Tai extended his hand and Matt took it in a firm grip.

“Listen, Tai, I’ve got to dash as I’m supposed to be picking Teiko up from work. But give me or her a text. She’s been nagging me all week to ask you and Kari out on a double date.”

Tai gave him a funny look. Not at the suggestion, as that sounded exactly like the sort of thing Teiko would do, but at the fact that Matt seemed willing to entertain it. “You’re ok with me and Kari being a couple?”

“I wasn’t at first,” Matt admitted, “however, Teiko has a habit of helping you see things differently… or slowly gnawing at you until you cave.”

He laughed, “that sounds like Teiko. “I suppose I’d better talk with her soon, otherwise she’ll probably come and hunt me down.”

It was Matt’s turn to laugh, “she will.” The blonde-haired teen then turned the ignition on his moped. “See you Monday,” he said before turning to look at the two girls, “I’ll see you guys later too.” With that, he set off down the road.

Kari leaned her head in towards Yolei. She’d not heard the exchange between the two boys but had caught the gist of it. “I don’t know about you, but I get the distinct impression that those two are friends again.”

The lavender-haired girl laughed. “Took them long enough. At least something good has come out of you and Tai becoming public.”

“I guess so,” Kari admitted. All the while she wondered whether that meant Matt approved of her relationship or not.

“Listen, Kari,” Yolei then said, “are you sure you’re going to be ok?”

She looked at her best friend and nodded. “Yeah, I think I’ll be alright. I just need to go for a long shower and scrub that stupid pen off my chest.”

“You’ve no idea how sorry I am that I didn’t just take you with me.”

“It’s ok, Yolei. You’ve done more than enough for me this week.”

Kari pulled her best friend into a hug, just as Tai limped over to join them.

“I think I’m going to need your help to get up the stairs,” he said to his girlfriend after she had broken off her hug.

Kari looked at him and nodded, “ok.” She turned back to Yolei, “I’ll see you on Monday.”

“We’ll be here to walk you to school,” the lavender-haired girl said with a smile. “See you then, Kari.” The girl turned to look at Tai, “later, Tai.” She gave Kari one last quick hug and then walked away.

“What did she mean by, ‘we’ll be here to walk you to school’?” Tai asked his girlfriend.

Kari smiled at him, “I’ll tell you inside. Now let’s go, I’m freezing.”

Tai put his arm over his girlfriend’s shoulder and the with her support, they walked towards the apartment building. It had been a rough week for both of them and they were in serious need of the brief reprieve that the weekend would offer. If only it could last more than two days.


	76. Pt6 03) The watcher

**Part Six: Secret No Longer**

**Chapter Three: The watcher**

It was Monday morning and Yuuko Kamiya had just finished cleaning up after breakfast. Her husband and both children had already left and so, like almost every day during term time for the last twelve years, she found herself alone in the apartment. Except today was not like the majority of those that had preceded it. No, today her mind was buzzing with memories, observations and what-if scenarios, to the point that she had not even formed her normal to-do list. Truth be told, she’d been feeling the stress from all these dark and worrisome thoughts since the tail end of the previous week.

After she had received the phone call the previous Monday, Yuuko had entered immediate denial about there being any sort of improper relationship between her children. The only brief blip had occurred the following morning when she had called the telephone operator to get the number of the mysterious caller. It had been a mobile number and so not one she could find in her address book. What she had intended to do with it, she had not known, but by the time she had hung up the phone, her hand had already scrunched up the piece of paper. However, by that evening, the first minuscule drops of fear had started to seep into her mind. At dinner, she had caught herself doing as the caller had advised; watching her children. Both had been somewhat quiet, but she had not detected anything out of the ordinary. She’d retreated to denial for the rest of the evening, while Tai and Kari had spent it inside the former's room.

Wednesday had been much the same, except her children had gone to Kari’s room this time. However, she had simply put it down to the fact that they were both grounded and that Tai no longer had to study. Thursday too had seen denial continue. That was until her son had come home and she had witnessed Kari give him a hug at the door. She’d watched covertly from the kitchen, with her mind telling her that it had a) gone on too long and b) that Tai’s hand seemed to have been several inches lower than it should have been. Friday had then been spent in a virtual wrestling match between what her eyes had seen and what her brain wanted to believe. Then her children had come home… together. This alone was no cause for concern, but even though he denied it, Tai looked like he had been involved in a fight. Kari had quickly shepherded him into her bedroom and then snuck into the bathroom for the first aid kit. They’d spent another evening together in her room.

On Saturday morning, she had made the decision to rescind her children’s punishment, to see what would happen. They’d left to go out late afternoon, Tai apparently heading to see Sora and Kari Yolei. She’d watched them from the window as they had left the apartment building and headed off in the same direction together. While it could simply have been the case that Tai had lied to her (they’d headed in the general direction of Yolei’s), a small voice in the back of her head said no. This was made worse when they just so happened to arrive home within ten minutes of each other. By the time she went to bed on Sunday night, the fear had properly taken root; Tai and Kari having spent the day playing video games in the lounge. It was like they were living in each other’s pockets. She had barely slept that night.

Yuuko finished boiling the kettle and poured herself a mug of strong coffee; her second of the morning. After adding milk and sugar, she went and sat on the sofa, mind still whirring. Surely it was just her imagination, she tried to tell herself. Tai and Kari had always been close siblings and had played with each other a lot when they were younger. Why should that relationship automatically change, just because they were now in their mid-teens?

_“But it did change,”_ a voice in the back of her head whispered. _“You noticed that Kari was spending increasingly more time alone in her bedroom over the past eighteen months. How many times did she sit and play video games with her brother, or go out with him during that time?”_

Yuuko thought back to when Kari had broken up with TK. She had been spending increasingly more time by herself during that time. But surely that had been because she’d chosen to focus on her studies. Her grades were certainly testament to that. But had that been the only reason? She closed her eyes as she intensified her search. Kari had stopped spending time with her brother during that period. Not once could she recall them spending any length of time in each other’s bedrooms, having sat together on the couch playing video games or indeed having gone out together. At least not until…

_“Until that weekend when she dyed her hair,” _the voice finished for her. _“Even though Tai was studying more, you noticed the shift in their relationship after that weekend. How much happier Kari seemed. Her greeting Tai at the door with a hug whenever he came home. Them starting to play video games again. That time they went out to the movies...”_

Yuuko took a long drink of her coffee and wished it was a glass of wine. She didn’t drink excessively but felt the need for a large glass of sauvignon blanc. It was all true. Bar the few weeks after Kari had supposedly broken up with the Takato boy, it was like her children had turned back the clock a few years. However, that was hardly a crime. If they wanted to spend time together, that was their choice to make. And it certainly didn’t scream incest.

_“But what about two weeks ago?” _the voice said. _“You know what you saw…”_

“No,” Yuuko thought firmly, “I didn’t see anything. It was just a trick of the light.”

_“Are you so sure about that?”_

“…” She took another drink of coffee.

_“Think back. Think back and you’ll remember.”_

“I don’t want to remember,” she said out loud, desperately trying to force the memory from her mind. Only she couldn’t. Inside her head, she could see the front door of the apartment. Her hand reaching for the handle and pulling it down. The door opening in front of her. The wooden floor stretching out across the main living area towards the sofa. The head of bright orange hair above…

The coffee mug fell from Yuuko’s hands and hit the rug with a low thud; spilling the remains of its contents all over it.

_“You saw it, didn’t you?”_

“No,” she snapped internally, “I did not see **that!**”

_“Yes, you did. You saw…”_

Yuuko clasped her hands over her eyes and shook her head. “No, no, no!” she said aloud. Unfortunately, she was powerless to stop the memory from playing over and over inside her mind. The front door of the apartment. Her hand reaching for the handle and pulling it down. The door opening in front of her. The wooden floor stretching out across the main living area towards the sofa. The head of bright orange hair above naked breasts. It had only lasted a heartbeat and at the time she had shaken her head and put it down to it being a trick of the light, but now she was certain. Kari had been topless. Now it started to make sense. The thuds of her children hitting the floor, followed by the apparent wrestling match and the hammy excuse of Tai having eaten his sister’s cookie. She’d thought there was something suspicious about the whole thing at the time, but chose to ignore it. Well, she couldn’t ignore it now. Her daughter had been straddling her son, topless. She was certain of it.

No, Yuuko thought defiantly, there is nothing untoward going on between my children. Whatever that was. Whatever silly game they were playing. It was just that, a silly game. Her children were not involved in an incestuous relationship!

_“But what if they are?” _the voice whispered. _“What if, under your very nose, Tai and Kari have been…”_

“Stop it!” Yuuko yelled, rising to her feet and starting to pace around the main living area; the coffee mug forgotten for now. She took a deep, calming breath. Ok, she said to herself internally, trying to sound rational. **If** Tai and Kari are doing **something** they shouldn’t be, what do I do? I can hardly confront them just because I **thought** I saw Kari topless when they were on the sofa together. They’d simply deny it and make sure they covered their tracks. I need something more concrete.

She paced back and forth a few more times, then suddenly found herself standing outside the door to Kari’s room. Without thinking, her hand reached down and took hold of the handle. She paused. Am I really about to do this? Am I seriously about to search my children’s bedrooms for evidence that they’re doing something indecent? The answer transpired to be yes, as she opened the door, stepped inside and closed it behind her. Her eyes scanned the room, not knowing where to start. Yuuko walked over to her daughter’s desk. On the surface she caught sight of a slim glass vase that held a single red rose; it was dead. It must have been a gift Kari had been given several weeks ago and from someone important to her for her to have kept it this long. No, not just a gift from someone important. A gift from an admirer or lover. Only they gave a single red rose as a gift. Kari must have a new boyfriend of some description. It was the only logical deduction.

A quick search of the desk drawers revealed nothing but notebooks, school supplies and a sketch pad containing drawings of various outfits Kari had created. She looked under the bed next and rummaged through boxes of old toys and junk; finding nothing. On finding a box containing a large number of CD’s, Yuuko flipped through them. They were all by either Pink Floyd or Mike Oldfield. She did a quick count and multiplied the number by the average cost of a CD. It amounted to a not insignificant sum of money, especially when factoring in the fact that they had all been bought in a period of eighteen months or less. This led her straight to her next port of call; Kari’s wardrobe. Neat and well organised, it was a fairly easy task to figure out what clothes her daughter had bought for herself. However, it was not so easy to estimate the cost of it all and in the end, she’d had to do a fair bit of guesswork. Regardless, she added it to the value of the CD’s and quickly deduced that it probably exceeded the sum of Kari’s allowance over the last eighteen months by a not-insignificant amount. Meaning that someone had been giving her a lot of gifts. Unfortunately, it proved little else. While Tai certainly had prior for buying his sister expensive gifts, her lit-match hair chief amongst them, Kari had claimed to have had a boyfriend, so they could easily have come from him.

After returning the boxes underneath her daughter’s bed, Yuuko turned her search to the bedside cabinet. It was there she found Kari’s diary. However, a quick flick through revealed that she had not written in it for over two years. She set it aside along with a volume of manga and pulled out the last item; a small wooden box. Opening it up caused her to gasp in horror at the sight of condoms and a bottle of lubricant. Her mind immediately tried to protect her by saying that Kari had probably been given them at a sex education seminar and kept them in case she ever needed them. Only the open bottle of lubricant, which was clearly not full, put pay to that illusion. Her sixteen-year-old daughter was or had been, having sex with someone. It was a stark revelation and one she wished she had not discovered. However, it still did not prove anything indecent between her children. She closed the box, put everything back where she had found it and hastily left her daughter’s bedroom.

Ok, she breathed, taking a moment to steady herself. My sixteen-year-old daughter is having sex. But at least she’s doing it safely. And if that’s all I discover today, it’s certainly the lesser of two evils. As Yuuko walked the short distance to Tai’s room, part of her mind screamed at her that it was not ok. That her daughter should not be having sex with anyone, regardless of whether she was doing it safely or not. In normal circumstances, she would have agreed. Would have stewed over it all day and when Kari came home, given her the riot act and demanded to know everything. Except there could be much worse to come.

Entering Tai’s room, she went through the exact same process as in Kari’s, finding nothing of interest in his desk, wardrobe or in the boxes under his bed. However, a search of his bedside cabinet revealed the same thing she had found in his sister’s; condoms and lubricant. Great, Yuuko thought as she shook her head in dismay, just great. Both of my children are having sex and most likely doing so under my own roof. At least Tai’s old enough… that notion did little to calm her. Her eyes stared at the condoms and lube. They were the same brand and type as the ones she’d found in Kari’s room. Coincidence, possibly. Except she could feel the fear bubbling away inside her. And as much as she wanted to deny it, she could feel that something was very wrong here.

Putting the contents of Tai’s bedside cabinet back, she stood up from where she had sat on his bed and went back to his desk. Maybe she would find something on his laptop. She knew that instant messaging was all the rage and if her children wanted to talk in secret, it would be an easy way to do so. Sitting down in the chair, she lifted the lid of her son’s laptop and pressed the power button. The screen flickered into life and once it had booted up, she was greeted with the welcome screen and a request for a password. Damn, Yuuko thought as she began wracking her brain for ideas. First, she tried the J1 league soccer team he supported, FC Tokyo, but had no luck with any combination of spaces and capitals. Taking a moment to think, she next tried his English team, Manchester United. The computer let her in when she tried it with capital M and U and a space between the two words. It took her a moment to find the messaging program and then another to look through the list of contacts. Unfortunately, few of the screen names contained the user's actual name, so she was forced to look through several conversations before stumbling upon one with someone called Digital Punk. A quick read of some of the latest messages between them was enough for Yuuko to close it in disgust. Tai and whoever this girl was, had been roleplaying sexual acts online. She shut the laptop down and closed the lid over. Could the girl he’d been having such amoral conversations with be Kari?

As Yuuko hurried back to her daughter’s room, something about the name Digital Punk nagged at the back of her head. She’d come across that name before but could not place where. Putting it to one side, she sat down at Kari’s desk and opened her laptop. Again, she was greeted with a screen asking for a password. Unfortunately, nothing she could think of worked. She even fetched the CD box from underneath her daughter’s bed and started trying names of the albums it contained, but to no avail. She had no choice but to give up. Instead, she searched her brain for where she had seen the name Digital Punk. Only her mind came up blank. Shutting down Kari’s laptop, she left the room.

Yuuko returned to the main living area and started to clean up the mess she had made with the coffee mug earlier. Something was wrong, she could feel it in her bones. However, she had no proof of it, at least not yet. If she could just get a glimpse of her daughter’s laptop while she had the messenger program open, it would tell her if Kari was Digital Punk or not.

It had been a difficult morning for Yuuko. She’d learned that both her children were having sex. Which would be enough to drive any mother crazy. However, she had a deepening fear that there was an even worse secret just waiting to be discovered. This one thought stayed with her throughout the remainder of her day.


	77. Pt6 04) The right to decide

**Part Six: Secret No Longer**

**Chapter Four: The right to decide**

In comparison with her hell on earth previous week, this one had been so much easier for Kari Kamiya thus far. She’d woken up on Monday morning, showered (finally being able to rid herself of the last of the marker pen that covered her chest), got dressed ate breakfast and then been greeted outside her apartment building by no less than six members of S.P.E.T. including chief architect, Yolei and Davis; who had been absent on Friday due to soccer practice. They’d all greeted her warmly, given her a hug (because apparently, that was their thing), and then formed a group around her as they walked to school. The few snowballs that had been thrown her way had all missed and the throwers quickly chased off by Davis and another boy, Akira, using tennis ball launchers. She’d then been escorted around the school all day by various combinations of S.P.E.T members, their number never dropping below six. While it had been a touch oppressive, it had done the job. No one had been able to get close enough to do anything untoward to her and anyone who dared to yell an insult at her were themselves yelled out of the corridor by a chorus of voices. At the end of the day she had then been escorted safely home.

Come Tuesday, the snowballs had stopped and any known offenders had remained silent whenever she and her entourage passed by them. Kari had also noticed new faces amongst their ranks. Yolei it seemed had been on a recruitment drive. It had been a relief to have an almost normal day she had thought when she had finally arrived home that evening. Wednesday morning had passed by in the same manner as the day before. And come lunchtime, she was just starting to think things might go back to normal when everything blew up…

##

Kari sat in one of the comfortable chairs that lay in front of the guidance counsellor’s desk. She was in serious trouble now. Not actual trouble with the school. No, that honour went to those that had been at the head of the altercation; Yolei and Davis unfortunately amongst them. However, it had not taken long for the teachers to determine that she had been the epicentre of the incident, even if only a spectator to the actual event. Worse yet, Hitana had made it crystal clear to them that the altercation was all to do with the fact that she was a brotherfucker. She took a long slow breath to try and steady herself and desperately tried to stop her limbs from shaking. Oh god, this could be it. If she could not convince the guidance counsellor that the rumours about her were untrue, it was game over. A call would go home, her mother would come in and be told everything the teachers had managed to establish. She would then have to face her mom and she doubted she would be able to keep the truth from her for long. Even if she managed to maintain the lie, she would be taken home, sat down on the sofa beside Tai and the question would be put to both of them. It would be pointless to continue to lie at that point, as all it would do would be to buy them a few awkward months’ worth of time before they planned to tell them anyway.

Kari felt a cold sheen of sweat form on her skin as she waited for the guidance counsellor to arrive. She did not need to measure her pulse to know that her heart rate was erratic. With one shaky hand, she reached into her bag and pulled out her cell phone. If the guidance counsellor walked in and saw her texting someone, there would be more awkward questions. However, she needed to warn Tai of the situation. If things went south, he needed to know what he was walking into when he got home after school. Fingers moving franticly, she wrote, _“Tai, we’re in trouble. I’ve been pulled into the counsellor’s office because the teachers are aware of the rumours that are being spread about us. I’m scared that if things go badly, they’ll bring mom in…”_

She kept an eye on the door, her hand hovering over her bag, ready to drop her phone inside should it open. Heart in her mouth, Kari waited for either Tai to respond or the counsellor to arrive. It was the former who was quickest and she felt her phone vibrate in her hand. Hurriedly she flipped it open and read, _“Kari, don’t panic. You need to relax and tell them that it’s a nasty rumour, but you don’t know where it came from. I know it will feel wrong to do so, but you don’t have a choice. As neither of us wants mom and dad to find out this way. Stay strong and message me as soon as you can. If I don’t hear from you, I’ll assume the worst. I love you and I’ll see you soon.”_

Kari sent a quick, _“I love you too,”_ before dropping her phone into her bag, just as the room door opened and the guidance counsellor stepped in. She was a kind woman, in her early thirties, with long brown hair that held a slight curl and warm hazel eyes that sat behind a pair of red-framed glasses. Today, her hair was held up with a pair of chopsticks, with two long curly strands hanging down either side of her glasses. Her name was Miss Katsuragi.

“Hello, Kari,” Miss Katsuragi said as she walked behind Kari to a chabudai (low table) that sat on a rug at the bottom end of her office.

Kari turned her head to look at her.

“Why don’t you come sit with me?” the woman said softly as she sat down and began pouring hot water from a kettle into a small teapot.

While the question had been phrased as an invitation, Kari knew she had no choice in the matter. Rising from the chair, she crossed the room to the chabudai and sat down opposite the counsellor.

“Tea?” Miss Katsuragi said, lifting the teapot and hovering it above a pair of yunomi teacups.

“Please,” Kari said with a polite nod of her head. She didn’t particularly want it, but it might help to steady her nerves.

The woman poured for them both then sat the pot down. She then slid one of the cups towards her.

“Thank you,” she said and tried to give the woman a light smile. It took effort for her to stop her hand from shaking as she reached out and picked up the cup. She blew on it several times before taking a sip, consciously aware that the counsellor was watching her over the rim of her own cup.

“Now, Kari, since we’ve never had to sit down and have a chat before, I want you to know that it is safe for you to say whatever it is you need to while you’re are in this office. Do you understand?”

Yeah right, she thought bitterly. Safe from punishment from the school maybe, but safe from you deciding that you need to call my mom, not likely. However, she could not very well say that out loud. Instead, she replied with a brief nod of her head and the words, “I understand.”

Miss Katsuragi took a sip of her tea before she then said, “why don’t you start by telling me what happened just there in the corridor?”

Kari bit her lip behind the rim of her cup before taking a deep breath. She’d have to be careful here as the counsellor had probably already heard the story from one of the teachers who had interceded in the altercation. “Class had finished and after packing away my things, I headed towards the lunchroom with some of my friends.”

“Members of this new club, S.P.E.T.?”

Kari nodded, “yes.”

“Are you a strong believer in equality and tolerance, Kari?” Katsuragi asked quizzically.

“Of course,” she replied without hesitation. “Everyone should have the right to be who they want to be and love who they chose to love, so long as it doesn’t harm anyone else.”

The counsellor gave her a small smile. “You’re quite liberal and open-minded for one so young. Although it seems that there are quite a number of you who share such values.” The woman paused to take a sip of her tea, before adding, “please, continue.”

“We were walking through the corridors when we suddenly found our path blocked by another group of students. When they wouldn’t let us past, some of my friends started to argue with them.”

“Why wouldn’t they let you past?” Katsuragi probed.

It had been obvious that the woman would ask this and in hindsight, she perhaps should not have even tried to gloss over that particular detail. She took a mouthful of tea to try and hide her awkwardness at talking about this point, before she eventually answered, “they wouldn’t let the group past because I was part of it.”

She received a look from above the rim of the counsellor’s teacup that told her she expected more than that.

Kari sighed. “They’ve got a problem with me because of this rumour that has been circulating about me. They think it’s true and find me disgusting because of it.”

“The rumour about you and your brother?” Katsuragi asked.

Although the woman’s voice had been soft and tone kind, Kari could tell that the question had been deliberately asked to gauge her reaction. She took another sip from her cup and then nodded her head, “yes.” This was where she had to be careful. If she acted too defensively or tried to skirt around the issue, it would immediately flag and sway the counsellor towards believing that the rumour was true. “There’s been a rumour going around since last week about me sleeping with Tai.” She chose to leave it at that, just the simple facts of the matter. Katsuragi would naturally fish for more details and she would give them to her, but only when she directly asked for them.

However, for now, at least, the counsellor chose to return to her initial line of enquiry. “So, what happened between the group you were with and the other students?”

Kari relaxed slightly on hearing the question. Now that they had established that the rumour about herself and Tai existed, she was happy to divulge the details of the corridor spat. “The other students were happy to let the rest of my group pass, but not me. However, my friends did not want to leave me. I think they were afraid that something nasty might happen to me if they did. Some insults were then aimed at me, which caused my friends to shout some back. Then someone, I don’t know who, shoved someone else and a fight broke out.” That part was a lie. She knew full well that Davis had been the first person to lay a hand on another. However, she had no intention of getting him in any more trouble than he already was. “It didn’t take long for Mr Nishimura to appear and put a stop to it.” She drank a mouthful of tea when she finished as the woman studied her.

“Thank you, Kari,” Miss Katsuragi said as she sat down her cup and started pouring herself another. “Would you like some more?” the woman indicated the teapot in her hands.

“No thank you,” she replied; the tea was not quite to her taste.

“Kari, you know that you can tell me anything and I won’t judge you,” the counsellor then said. “I’m here to offer advice, help and support, not to cast judgement upon my students.”

She managed to keep her expression calm when she said, “I know.” Even though internally, her response had been more akin to, yeah right.

“Kari,” the slight firming up of the woman’s tone told her before she even uttered the words, “are you in any way involved in a romantic relationship with your brother?” what the question was going to be.

She sat her cup softly on the table and said, “no.” Though she kept a straight face, denying her relationship with Tai cut her deeply. It felt like a betrayal of both him and herself. However, in this instance, she had no choice. Both she and her boyfriend knew full well what would happen if she admitted the truth to the counsellor. And neither of them wanted their parents to find out in this way.

Miss Katsuragi looked at her pointedly over the top of her cup. “Are you absolutely certain, Kari?”

Shit, so the woman had either made her mind up before entering the room or something from their conversation so far had done so. This was not good. She would continue to deny it, of course, but it might not matter. The counsellor may already have decided to call her mother. Hell, the call could already have been made, hence why it had taken so long for the woman to come and talk to her. The panic that she had steadily been trying to control, bubbled inside her stomach and almost made her want to wretch. She forced herself to take a calming breath and hoped it didn’t show. “I’m certain,” she eventually managed to say. “I don’t know where these rumours came from.”

The counsellor let out the smallest of sighs and sat her cup down on the table. It was at this point that the woman threw her a curveball. “Kari, if your brother has done something to you, anything that you know is wrong, you need to tell someone.”

“What!” Kari exclaimed in disbelief, unable to contain the burst of anger that filled her upon hearing the insinuation. How dare the woman even suggest that Tai had ever done something to her without her consent. It was downright slanderous.

“Kari,” Miss Katsuragi said firmly. “If your brother has forced you to…”

“Tai would never force me to do anything!” Kari said hotly, her fists clenching as a torrent of rage coursed through her. “He’s the most caring, compassionate and honourable person I know and I love…” she stopped abruptly as her eyes met those of the counsellor’s and she realised too late that she had fallen for the trap. Her cheeks immediately started to burn and her breaths became short rasps. It was game over now. The counsellor would send for her mother and she would be told everything. Then she would be taken home and the inquest would begin. She felt her eyes begin to prick and soon hot tears began to run down her cheeks. How could she have been so stupid?

In front of her, Miss Katsuragi picked up the teapot. “Kari, I need you to listen to me carefully,” she said as she refilled both cups. “I need you to calm down and then we can talk.” The woman then handed her a tissue.

She took it and slowly began to dry her eyes, however, the tears continued to pour. This prompted the counsellor to come around to her side of the table and give her a hug. Kari continued to cry within the woman’s embrace for several minutes before finally, the tears began to subside. She felt cold to her core, almost numb.

Miss Katsuragi then helped her dry her eyes and guided her hands to the warm teacup. “Drink,” she instructed softly, “it will help.”

Kari did so and felt the hot liquid flow down her throat and start to warm her from the inside out. The woman left her to drink the entire cup as she re-boiled the kettle. When she returned, she made a fresh pot of tea before saying, “why don’t we start at the beginning, Kari? Are you involved in a romantic relationship with your brother?”

Kari stared at the contents of her teacup, unable to make eye contact with Miss Katsuragi. There was no point denying it now. Her reaction to the woman’s insinuation about Tai had given the game away. “Yes,” she whispered, much as she had done when confronted by TK the previous week.

“Ok,” the woman breathed slowly, “it’s good that you have told me the truth.”

“Why?” Kari cried out, her voice shaking as her emotions continued to bleed unchecked from her, “so you can tell my mom that you’ve heard me admit it?”

Miss Katsuragi reached across the table, took hold of one of her hands and then lifted her chin with the other. She found herself staring into compassionate hazel eyes as the woman said, “no, so we can talk openly and honestly.”

While the counsellor had not said that she wouldn’t be calling her mother, her words were enough to calm Kari slightly, at least for the moment. Slowly she began to regulate her breathing.

“Why don’t you tell me about your brother? How did the two of you come to be involved with each other?”

“It’s a long story,” she replied after a moment or two, unsure if she wanted to give the woman any more ammunition with which to supply her mother.

“We’ve got plenty of time, Kari. I’m willing to listen if you are willing to talk.” Miss Katsuragi gave her hand a gentle squeeze. “Take your time and tell me as much or as little as you want.”

Kari took a sip of her tea and stared at the counsellor’s kind features. Was she really about to do this? Was she actually going to divulge the details of her relationship with Tai? She swallowed the mouthful of tea, took in a slow breath and began at the beginning. She told the woman about Yolei’s sleepover, the magazine quiz, her relationship and breakup with TK, Davis and the year of depression that followed. Occasionally, Miss Katsuragi would ask a question, which she would answer and then continue. She went on to tell her about the weekend alone with Tai, how she had accidentally kissed him, the fallout from that and the weeks that had followed. When she finally got to the part where he confessed his love for her, she left out the part about his self-harming. It was not her place to talk about that and she certainly did not want to risk a call going out to the counsellor of Odaiba High School and have Tai hauled into their office. It was with a mix of great fondness and sadness that she spoke about the relationship she and Tai had shared from that point. The highs they had enjoyed when together, but also the lows of when they had been apart. When it came to the part about their breakup, Kari started to cry again. The memory of that incident still holding a lot of pain for her. Miss Katsuragi gave her more tissues and patiently waited for her to continue. For obvious reasons, she skimmed over details about their four-week separation. Then revelled in the memory of when they had gotten back together. Finally, she spoke about the weeks since, leaving out details about them having had sex.

When she had finished, Miss Katsuragi then asked, “so, where did the rumours in school come from?”

Kari hesitated for a moment, before she whispered, “TK. His brother found out about us and told him. He then confronted me in homeroom last Monday and neglected to keep his voice down…” she paused for a moment, reluctant to add, “…I may also have told him that it was true.”

A look spread across the counsellor’s face that told Kari that the final pieces of the puzzle had just slotted into place. “Why did you tell TK the truth?”

“Because I seriously hurt him when I broke up with him and I felt I owed it to him,” she replied. “All I could see was the pain in his eyes and I didn’t think about the consequences.”

“Ok,” Miss Katsuragi breathed slowly, “I think I’ve heard enough.” The woman paused for a moment and looked as though she was struggling to come to a decision.

This was it, Kari thought, judgement time. Granted, it took her by surprise that the woman looked so torn. She would have assumed that the decision had been made the moment she confessed.

After a few more agonising moments, Miss Katsuragi said, “Kari, I need you to listen to me carefully.”

She replied with a small nod of agreement.

“This is a very serious matter in terms of your personal wellbeing and by rights, I should have your mother telephoned and brought in immediately. Add to that the fact that it has caused disruption within the school and the principal would certainly insist.”

Kari lowered her head on hearing the woman’s words. She’d known this would be the line of argument. Her relationship with Tai would be considered unnatural, unhealthy and bad for her mental wellbeing. Not to mention that it had been the root cause of a major altercation amongst the student body.

“However,” Kari’s eyes flickered up to stare at Miss Katsuragi on hearing the woman speak the word. “I also have a duty to do what is in the best interests of my students and at this moment in time, I don’t think that is in your best interests.”

She stared at the counsellor, not willing to believe what she had just said. Had the woman actually just suggested that she might not phone her mom?

“As you can see, this presents me with a serious problem, Kari,” Miss Katsuragi continued. “At present, I don’t think bringing your mother into this situation is in your best interests, however, I also can’t ignore my other obligations and do nothing.” The woman paused, the torn-in-two expression resurfacing on her face. After a few moments of silence, she finally said, “on this occasion, I’m not going to phone your mother.”

Kari’s mouth fell open and she could not believe her luck. She’d been boxed in with no escape, yet somehow, inexplicably, she was going to walk out of this room unscathed. She was about to blurt out a massive thank you when Katsuragi spoke again.

“However, I am going to give you a serious warning and some advice. If there is another incident like what happened today, I will have no choice but to have your mother brought in. The principal will insist on it and I will be forced to tell her what you’ve just told me. So, my advice to you is this, either you need to end the relationship with your brother, or the two of you need to tell your parents about it yourselves. If you come back and promise me that it is over, I will keep your secret and maintain the stance that I am convinced it is nothing more than a vicious rumour. What you choose to do is up to you, Kari.”

Kari allowed the woman’s words to sink in before she responded. It was not an enviable choice, however, at least it was **a** choice. And while she could not end her relationship with Tai, the likelihood of another incident was high. That left her only one option, she and Tai would have to tell their parents; sooner rather than later. She met the counsellor’s gaze, “I understand.”

Miss Katsuragi gave her a soft smile. “I’m going to arrange an appointment for you to come back and talk to me next week, barring any incident between now and then. That will give you some time to make a decision and we can talk about it then. Sound fair?”

Kari sighed internally. She had a bad feeling that, regardless of what she decided, she would be having weekly appointments with the counsellor until further notice. Unfortunately, the woman was throwing her a rather generous bone and she could not afford to turn it down. “Ok,” she said softly.

“Glad to hear it,” Miss Katsuragi said and she stood up. “I’ll give you my permission to take the rest of the afternoon off, give you some time to think.”

At the woman’s behest, Kari stood up and received a hug, before being escorted to the door.

“Good luck, Kari,” the counsellor said and gave her one last smile.

“Thank you,” she replied with a polite nod before she turned and left the office.

Passing through the now empty corridors, Kari made her way to the main exit. That had been too close. Unfortunately, it had only delayed the inevitable. She and Tai now had no choice, they had to tell their parents.


	78. Pt6 05) There's no way out of here

**Part Six: Secret No Longer**

**Chapter Five: There’s no way out of here**

The index finger of Tai’s left hand continually traced the embossed pattern of his crest on the leather wrist cuff his girlfriend had given him for Christmas. Stuck in class, there was little else he could do to either help her or steady his own nerves. While he had made the message he had sent Kari sound like he was calm, he was anything but. A cold sweat clung to his skin and he felt sick to his stomach. At this very moment, his mom could be sitting in an office with his sister and discovering the truth about their incestuous relationship. And he would be none the wiser until he got home unless Kari managed to send him another message.

At the front of the class, the teacher continued to talk, but Tai had tuned out long ago. What were he and Kari going to do if his mom now knew their secret? Their parents would almost certainly try to put a stop to it. Unfortunately, he could only guess at how far they might go to try and ensure it came to an end. He was eighteen. Would they try to kick him out? Or perhaps send Kari away to some boarding school? He did not know and did not relish finding out. While he’d known this day would come, he’d hoped to have a little more control over it than this. Perhaps it had been too much to hope for that they would have managed to keep their relationship a secret until he had moved out.

In his pocket, Tai felt his phone vibrate and his spine stiffened. Please be Kari and not Mom, he thought as he waited for the teacher to turn around so he could sneak his phone out of his pocket and reads the message. Come one, come on, he cursed under his breath as the man continued to stare at the class and talk. He was almost at the point of risking getting his phone confiscated when the teacher finally turned to draw a diagram on the blackboard. Wasting no time, Tai slipped his hand into his pocket, pulled out his phone and flipped it open. It was from Kari. He breathed a partial sigh of relief, but it soon caught in his throat when he read, _“Tai, we’re safe for the moment, but need to talk asap. The counsellor has let me leave school early, so I’m going to head for that nice coffee shop near your school. Meet me there as soon as you can. Love, Kari.”_

Shit, Tai thought. Even though they seemed to have dodged a bullet, it sounded like the gun still had plenty of shots left. His eyes glanced at the time at the top of the screen before he quickly typed, _“ok,”_ then pocketed his phone. He still had another ninety minutes of school before he could leave to go and meet her; fuck! For a moment, he thought about just picking up his stuff and leaving. However, he quickly decided against it. Another phone call home to say he had cut class would only add to their problems. He would just have to wait it out.

The seconds felt like minutes and the minutes like hours as Tai was forced to endure the remainder of his school day. So focused on Kari and the situation that they now faced, he didn’t even notice when one teacher left and another entered. Indeed, it was only when the end of day chime sounded, that his mind snapped back to the here and now. Like a bat out of hell, he shoved his books inside his bag and ran from the classroom. Dodging and weaving his way through the steadily filling hallways, Tai made his way to the main entrance, burst out of the double doors and sprinted to the bike racks. He yelled out a curse as his frantic fingers struggled with the lock on his bicycle. When it eventually sprang free, he wrenched the bike out of the rack, hopped on and hit the pedals with furious feet.

Taking risks he normally never would, like wagering the speed of his legs against that of a small car, Tai hurried along the slushy roads until he soon came to the coffee shop. While he had visited a few with his girlfriend recently, he suspected Kari had chosen this one purely for its proximity to his school. He dismounted and found a place to lock his bike and then headed inside. At a table in the far corner, he caught sight of Kari's lit-match hair and headed straight for it.

“Hi,” she greeted when he reached the table. Though she had tried to sound cheerful, he could hear the undertones of fear and worry. “I got you a hot chocolate,” she indicated a steaming mug in front of the empty chair.

“Thanks,” Tai replied as he sat down. “Are you ok?” he asked, reaching out a hand to take one of hers; somehow it was still cold.

Kari gave him a smile he knew to be fake, “I’m fine.”

He chose to accept it for what it was and cut to the chase. “What happened?” he asked, unable to keep the concern from his tone.

Kari took a deep breath, before she answered, “there was an altercation in the corridors at lunchtime. Several people banded together and blocked me and the members of S.P.E.T. from getting into the lunchroom. They started arguing and eventually it devolved into a fight. When a teacher broke it up and demanded to know what it was about, Hitana was kind enough to say it was because I was fucking my brother.” She paused to take a drink of her hot chocolate and Tai gave her hand a reassuring squeeze. “As soon as she said that, I was taken aside and sent to the counsellor's office; that's when I text you.” Kari shook her head and he could see her fight to hold back tears. “She tried to suggest that you had assaulted or raped me.” The tears began to flow. “I got angry... I yelled at her that you were the most caring, compassionate and honourable person I know... and that I loved you... She bated me Tai and I fell for it. I've ruined everything.”

Tai immediately shifted his chair around and pulled her into a hug. This was bad, but he could not allow Kari to think she had ruined things for them. This could not be helped. Once their secret became public knowledge, it surely would only have been a matter of time before something like this happened. “It's not your fault, Kari. This was bound to happen sooner or later. The important thing is that you are ok. Now, tell me what happened after that. Given that we're sitting here and not in front of mom and dad, I take it that the school didn’t call home.”

“No, she didn’t,” Kari said shakily in agreement. “But she got me to sit and tell her everything about our relationship... then gave me a choice.”

“A choice?” Tai asked, sensing that this was where the ‘for now' part of his girlfriend’s message came in.

“Yeah... She said that if there is another incident like the one today, she will be forced to call mom and tell her everything she knows. However, if I promise her that our relationship is over, she's agreed to keep it a secret and tell mom and the principal that it is just a vicious rumour that is circulating. Otherwise, we can choose to tell mom and dad ourselves or run the risk of there being another incident.”

Tai's features formed into a grimace, was there even an actual choice available to them? They'd been down the breakup road and knew exactly what dark place that ended in. He thought for a moment before saying, “what if you lied to the counsellor?”

Kari stared into her mug. “I have a feeling she'd see through that. Besides what will it buy us? A few months in which mom is watching our every move because she's been told about this rumour? Not to mention that it would only make things worse if we lie to mom and dad now, only to tell them in a few months’ time that it's actually true. How will that make us look?”

He stared into the dark depths of his own mug; the contents looked bleak. As always, his girlfriend had already thought the scenario through and come up with the only answer. They had to tell their parents before another incident occurred at her school. “How long do you think we have?”

“…I don’t know… probably until sometime next week, maybe?”

“You think the kids at school won’t do anything else tomorrow of Friday?” he asked nervously.

Kari shook her head, “no. By the sounds of it, they will all have got in trouble today and won’t want to risk any further incident this week.”

“Doesn’t sound like we have much choice then,” Tai said in resignation.

“No we need to…” she paused mid-sentence and turned her head away. When she turned back, she failed to meet his gaze as she finished, “…tell mom and dad by the end of the weekend…”

Tai met his girlfriend’s gaze, “Kari, are you feeling ok?”

“Yeah… my stomach just feels a little upset,” his girlfriend replied. She’d visibly paled and looked like she might throw up. “I guess it’s just the thought of actually going through with this.”

“I suppose so,” Tai agreed. To be fair, he could feel the butterflies in his own stomach. The fingers on his left hand found their way inside the cuff of his shirt and began absentmindedly tracing the embossed pattern of his crest on the black leather cuff. “My exam result should be here by Saturday, why don’t we tell them once I know what I’ll be doing next year.”

Kari opened her mouth to respond but quickly covered it with a hand. Instead, she gave him a nod, before hurriedly standing up.

“Are you ok?” Tai asked, but his girlfriend was out of earshot before he had finished asking the question. He waited, a look of concern deepening on his face as the minutes ticked by. Kari had seemingly avoided getting sick after sitting in the park the previous week, maybe this was fate catching up with her in the form of a stomach bug. Or perhaps she was simply having a physiological reaction to mounting stress that had been piling on her since TK confronted her.

When Kari eventually emerged from the bathroom, Tai could see that she looked ill, as she walked back towards him. A quick whiff of her breath told him that she’d thrown up. “Do you want to go home?” he asked before she sat down.

She gave him a brief nod. Tai immediately stood up, took her coat from the back of her chair and held it open for her to slip on. She did so and while she zipped it up, pulled on his own. Taking her by the hand, he led his girlfriend out of the coffee shop. They were halfway down the road before Kari spoke.

“Ok, so I lied,” she said in a low voice.

Tai turned his head and met her gaze.

“I feel horrible,” she finished.

“Then let’s get you home so you can go to bed.”

His girlfriend gave him a weak smile as she wrapped her arms around him and rested her head against his shoulder. She said nothing more as they made the journey home and Tai suspected her silence was due to a fear of vomiting again. Unfortunately, if by day’s end he started being sick too, it would not confirm it to be a stomach bug. For he could feel his stomach churning at the thought of what they were going to do before the week was done. The next few days may well just be the hardest of his life.


	79. Pt6 06) Hidden fear

**Part Six: Secret No Longer**

**Chapter Six: Hidden fear**

The weekend was fast approaching and Yuuko Kamiya had managed to do little to dispel her growing fears about her children. On both Monday and Tuesday, as soon as Kari had finished her homework, she had gone to spend time with her brother. And yesterday, they had come home together. However, while it only added to her fear that something inappropriate was going on between them, it did not prove anything. Indeed, she hadn't actually managed to find anything incriminating beyond the brief flash she may have seen of Kari topless and the easily coincidental condoms and lubricant bottles she'd found in both her children rooms on Monday. She’d kept telling herself that they were innocent until proven guilty, only it had done nothing to stop the sinking feeling that, sooner or later, she would find the evidence she so desperately wished did not exist. Worse yet, she knew where to find it; her daughter's laptop. Unfortunately, unlike her brother, Kari was a lot more careful about computer security.

Twice on Monday, Yuuko had snuck into her daughter’s room when she had left it, hoping to see her instant messaging handle. Except it transpired that Kari locked her laptop whenever she left her bedroom. After that had failed, she'd made up an excuse the previous two evenings to go into her daughter's room with the hopes of catching a glimpse of it over her shoulder before she had the chance to close the window. She'd thought Kari's perchance for wearing her headphones would have given her ample time to sneak up on her, but again she had failed to see it. Hell, she'd even ignored her daily chores and spent today trying to guess the girl's password, but to no avail. In the end, she had counted herself fortunate that the laptop did not have a lockout function for too many incorrect guesses.

Yuuko sat on the living room sofa, book in hand, but eyes staring over the top of it, glued to the door of her daughter’s bedroom. There had to be another way to figure out if Kari was this ‘Digital Punk’ girl that Tai had been talking too. Should she try calling some of her daughter’s friends to see if one of them could tell her… No, that would just raise far too much suspicion and probably get back to Kari before she even managed to get an answer. Could she possibly take Kari’s laptop to a specialist and pay to have it hacked? It was a nice idea in theory, except bar her kid’s friend Izzy, she did not know where to even begin looking for someone with that sort of skill set, as such an act was probably not legal. She sighed internally, her options beyond making up more excuses to go into her daughter’s room seemed to be rather thin on the ground. If only the caller had provided her with some concrete evidence… a hollow chuckle resonated around inside her head. She would probably have refused to entertain it, given how dismissive she had been of the individual in the first place.

A lightbulb suddenly flickered into life inside Yuuko’s head. The caller had said they were one of her children’s friends. If that were true, then they might be able to confirm whether or not Digital Punk was Kari. It might be worth a shot, she thought, placing her book down on the coffee table and rising from the sofa. She was halfway towards the phone table when she remembered that she had scrunched up the note containing the caller’s number; damn it. It would be a miracle if someone had not thrown it out by now. A search of the phone table and the floor beneath it proved that sometimes, miracles do happen. Unfolding the crumpled paper, Yuuko picked up the phone in a trembling hand and hesitantly dialled.

The phone rang for several moments before she heard a voice reply, “hello?” she recognised it instantly.

“Hello,” Yuuko replied before pausing for a second or two, “it’s Mrs Kamiya,” she then added firmly, imparting in those few words the knowledge that she knew to whom she was talking and that they had been the mysterious caller.

There was silence for several seconds, before the caller replied, “hello, Mrs Kamiya, how can I help?”

Yuuko glanced around to ensure no one was in earshot, then said, “I’ve been watching Tai and Kari… and I’m beginning to think you may have been right.” She felt a cold chill run down her spine at making that admission. The whole idea of her children being involved in an incestuous relationship made her feel unclean. Like it was a stain upon her own person that she could not wash away.

“I’m sorry to reiterate this, but I am right… and I assume you’re calling because you’re now looking for some form of proof, correct?”

“Yes,” Yuuko breathed quietly after a moment or two. “So far, nothing I’ve witnessed or found is concrete.”

“But when you add it all together, it’s starting to paint a damning picture.”

“Yes,” she admitted, images of what she had seen and found flashing through her mind. “The only thing concrete I have is that Tai’s been having some rather lewd conversations with a girl online. Someone who goes by the screen name Digital Punk. Do you know if that’s Kari?”

“No, I’m afraid I don’t. I don’t know anyone that goes by that screen name.”

“Damn,” Yuuko cursed under her breath. There went her best hope of finding out if Digital Punk was her daughter. Her next question was a long shot, but she asked anyway, “do you have anything concrete that proves what they are doing?”

“No. Unfortunately, Matt did not share the photo he has and I suspect he won’t be open to either confirming what I say is true or showing it to you.”

Yuuko was about to ask the caller for any information they might have regarding possible places where her children might spend time together, when the sound of Kari’s door opening forced her to stop. Turning her head, she watched as her daughter stepped out into the hall; she’d changed out of her school uniform since dinner. Except when the girl turned to face in her direction, Yuuko almost dropped the handset and her mouth fell open in horror. On the right leg of Kari’s jeans, written in neon yellow and black fabric paint on backgrounds of the opposing colour, that she knew her daughter had done herself, were the words Digital Punk.

“Mrs Kamiya?” Yuuko heard the words through the earpiece, but could not respond. Her gaze was transfixed on the leg of Kari’s jeans.

It was fortunate that her daughter had her headphones on as was not paying attention, for the sight of Yuuko gawking at her in abject horror would probably have told her what she now knew to be true. Her children were having an incestuous relationship. Internally, she felt like her entire world had just been shattered by a wrecking ball. This could not be happening.

“Mrs Kamiya...?”

Robotically, Yuuko hung up the phone, crossed the main living area and headed for the hall. When she passed the kitchen, she caught sight of her daughter out of the corner of her eye and found she could not bring herself to turn and look at her. Quickening her pace, she headed into the bathroom and hurriedly closed the door. A tidal wave of disgust crashed over her the second she locked it. This could not be happening. Her children couldn’t be… an image of the condoms and open bottles of lubricant forced its way into her mind. Oh god! Her children were not just involved in an emotionally inappropriate relationship. They were having sex with one another!

From the pit of her stomach, Yuuko felt a large bubble of abhorrence burst so violently that it caused her to wretch. The very idea that Tai and Kari were involved in such a degenerate practice was so sickening that she could not contain it. The first wave of nausea hit and she darted across the room. Falling to her knees in front of the toilet, she just managed to lift the seat when she vomited. Images of her children, naked, bodies intertwined, filled her head as her stomach contents continued to uncontrollably pour forth.

It took several moments before Yuuko could finally take a proper breath. She remained on her knees as she wiped her mouth clean with some toilet paper and slowly managed to regulate her breathing. Shakily she got to her feet, her head falling into her hands. How could this have happened? How could her children have ended up in such a depraved relationship? She shook her head. Was this her and Susumu’s fault? Had keeping them in the same room together up until Tai was sixteen been a mistake? Had that forced them closer together and contributed to this unhealthy bond forming? What about the number of times they had left Tai to look after Kari? Questions of a similar ilk bombarded Yuuko’s mind for several minutes, before finally, she asked herself, what was she going to do now?

How much time passed, in which she remained inside the bathroom, she did not know. However, by the time she sidled out into the hallway, she had decided on her first course of action. She had to tell her husband. Walking over to the sofa, Yuuko sat down.

Her expression must have betrayed the fact that something was bothering her, for Susumu gave her a quizzical look and asked, “is something wrong, Honey?”

“We need to talk,” she said, her tone conveying the serious nature of the matter?”

“Ok,” her husband replied hesitantly, “what have I done this time?”

“Nothing,” she replied before taking a long pause, “it’s about the kids.”

He gave her a funny look, “the kids?”

“Keep your voice down,” Yuuko hissed, “and promise me you won’t yell when I tell you this, we can’t have them overhear this conversation.”

Her husband’s expression shifted to one of concern as she spoke. “Ok,” he replied trepidly, “what is this about?”

She closed her eyes for a moment as she took a deep breath. She couldn’t believe it had actually come to this. Last week, when she had sat back down after yelling at the caller, she would never have imagined having to actually repeat those words to her husband. Yet here she was. “I think Tai and Kari are having a romantic relationship.”

Susumu looked stunned for a brief moment, then started to laugh. “Ok, you had me there for a moment.”

Yuuko looked him straight in the eyes, a no-nonsense expression on her face.

It took a few moments, but soon her husband’s expression changed to one of shock and the colour drained from his face. “You… you’re serious!”

She gave him a grim look, “yes, I’m afraid so.”

Susumu’s mouth fell open and it was a struggle for him to say, “what’s happened to make you think that?”

“Remember last Monday night when I got angry on that telephone call?”

He nodded in response.

“That was one of their friend’s telling me that Tai and Kari were involved in an incestuous relationship.”

“And you believed them?”

Yuuko shook her head, “of course not, hence why I yelled at them. However, I kept seeing the kids together and couldn’t shake it from my mind. Eventually, I recalled something from the previous week. I came home early and caught a brief glimpse of Kari straddling Tai on the sofa. I’m positive she was topless.”

“How positive?”

“Very. At the time I thought it just a trick of the light and when I got over there, she had her t-shirt on and was wrestling with Tai on the floor, apparently over a cookie. I thought it was odd at the time, but brushed it aside.”

Her husband did not look convinced. “Are you sure you’re not just trying to make some random incident prove a wild theory.”

“No,” Yuuko snapped, “I know what I saw. Besides, that’s just the start. I’ve been watching them since the middle of last week and they’ve practically been living in each other’s pockets. I even rescinded their punishment last Saturday to see what they would do.”

“They went out to see different friends, didn’t they?”

“That’s what they said, but I watched them from the window and they went off together, meaning at least Tai lied to us. They then played video games together all Sunday.”

“Neither of those things means that they’re doing anything indecent,” Susumu countered. She knew he was not blindly disagreeing with her, rather playing devil's advocate in order to test her own thinking. It was one of the reasons they worked so well together as a couple.

Yuuko then bit her lip, like she was about to confess to something naughty, which technically she was, “on Monday I searched both of their rooms. Someone’s been buying Kari a lot of gifts recently, but more importantly, I found condoms and open bottles of lubricant in both of their bedrooms. The exact same type of condoms and lubricant.”

Her husband let out a low breath, “ok, so at the very least you think both of them are having sex.”

“It gets worse… much worse,” she replied, feeling a slight bout of nausea as her mind thought about her children sleeping with each other again. “I got into Tai’s laptop and saw that he’s been having lewd conversations with a girl that uses the name Digital Punk.”

The moment she uttered those last two words, her husband’s face fell. It seemed that, unlike her, he did not need to see Kari’s jeans to know that was what she had written on them. “Is there any chance that Kari bought those jeans with those words already printed on them?” he asked, his tone indicating that he was now clutching at straws.

She shook her head, “no. I know fabric paint when I see it. Kari customised those jeans herself.”

Yuuko sat and watched as her husband stood up and began pacing. After a moment, his head fell into his hands, much like hers had done earlier and she could tell he was struggling to process the truth. To his credit, he did not run off to the toilet to vomit like she had.

Several minutes passed before he said, “I can’t believe it. Not our Tai and Kari.”

She reached out and took hold of his trailing hand in her own as he went to pace past her once more. His head turned and his gaze met her own. “I didn’t want to believe it either… After I searched their bedrooms on Monday, I went to the temple every day and prayed for it not to be true. But I read those messages with my own eyes and saw Kari wearing those jeans less than an hour ago. Our children are sleeping together,” she struggled to say the final two words as she was suddenly overcome with the pain the discovery had caused her and she burst into tears.”

Within seconds, Susumu was at her side and wrapped his strong arms around her. He held her head close to his chest and she cried… and cried. When eventually she had nothing left, she whispered, “how could we have let this happen, Susumu? How could we have failed to notice the warning signs?”

“Maybe there weren’t any to notice,” he replied. “Tai and Kari are smart kid’s and seem to have covered their tracks well. We might still be none the wiser if one of their friends hadn’t tipped you off. Even then, most of the evidence you found is circumstantial. And certainly not enough to confront them with.”

This was the part that she had been afraid of. Like her husband had just said, most of the evidence was circumstantial. In theory, they both could still turn a blind eye and pretend it didn’t exist. Maybe if they looked the other way for long enough, they could convince themselves that nothing was wrong. Only Yuuko knew she could not do that. These were her children and they were making a huge mistake. As a parent, it was her responsibility to put a stop to it before they irreparably ruined their lives. She withdrew herself from her husband’s embrace and dried her eyes before she uttered the words, “what do we do about it?”

Susumu took a deep breath, then paused for a moment, perhaps wrestling with the same issues she had, before he finally said, “we need to catch them when they are together and doing something inappropriate that they cannot refute.”

Yuuko tentatively nodded in agreement, “ok, how do we catch them?”

Her husband scratched his chin. “Given how well they’ve covered their tracks, let’s assume that they’re smart enough to not do anything while they know one of us is at home. Hence, if we were to barge in on them right now, we’d probably only find them playing video games.”

“So, we need to let them think they have the place to themselves and catch them unawares.”

“Yes. Let’s tell them we’re going out to dinner this weekend, leave the apartment, give them an hour or so and them sneak back in early,” her husband proposed.

Yuuko could not believe that it had come to this, actually setting a trap to catch her children in the act of something indecent. And part of her still wanted to take the turn a blind eye option. Except she knew she could not. Reluctantly, she nodded her head, “ok.”

Susumu wrapped his arms around her again and she closed her eyes. Never in her life, not even on the day when Kari had almost died, had she felt such a failure as a mother. The only problem was, that Yuuko Kamiya knew she had not yet reached the bottom of that particular black hole. She would not remember falling asleep in her husband’s arms, tears still staining her pale cheeks.


	80. Pt6 07) If this is the last kiss (Let’s make it last all night)

**Part Six: Secret No More**

**Chapter Seven: If this is the last kiss (Let’s make it last all night)**

It was Friday evening and after two days in which she had been living on a metaphorical knife-edge, Kari Kamiya was grateful it was now the weekend. It had been touch and go at points, but fortunately, there had been no further incident in school since Wednesday. She had, however, still felt a bit nauseated on both days, but not enough to keep her from school, even though she had vomited once on each; she felt this evening. Unfortunately, it was an out of the frying pan and into the fire situation. While she had avoided her mom being called into school and told about her relationship with Tai, she now faced the prospect of having to tell her parents about their relationship before the end of Sunday. It was a terrifying prospect. How badly would they react? What would they do? Would they try to put a stop to it? Would they go as far as trying to separate them? Variations of these very questions, plus others of a similar ilk, had been relentlessly going through her mind ever since she set foot inside the apartment after school.

At breakfast that morning, her father had surprised her mother with a dinner reservation for that evening. When Kari had asked what the occasion was, he simply told them that he’d made a promise to her mother at New Year, to be more romantic in the forthcoming year. It was quite sweet, she had thought, that even after all these years, her father was still willing to do small things like this to make her mom happy. He’d then given Tai money for the two of them to order some take out for dinner, assuming neither of them had any plans to go out. She’d felt a sense of guilt when her boyfriend had accepted it and she’d suspected he had too. For they’d both known how much damage they were about to do to the family before the end of the weekend.

Kari lay on her bed, eyes closed and headphones on. Mike Oldfield’s aptly named Crises album enveloping her. She let out a regulated breath as the second lyrical section of the title track began.

_“The watcher and the tower, waiting hour by hour.”_

A good metaphor she thought. She was the watcher and the task of telling her parents about her relationship with Tai, the tower that loomed over her as she waited here, hour by hour.

_“There’s a breach in the security, a disturbance in tranquillity.”_

She could think of no better way to capture the essence of what had happened over the course of the last two weeks, that had led to…

_“The watcher and the tower, waiting hour by hour.”_

Kari allowed the music to soothe her and push thoughts of the current situation from her mind. It would only be a temporary reprieve, like putting a bandage over a wound that clearly needed stitches. However, she would take what she could get. Moments when she had felt some semblance of peace had been rare of late and she had a bad feeling they were about to become even more scarce, but that would be a little later on…

…Kari felt a hand lightly touch her shoulder and her eyes snapped open to gaze into the brilliant chocolate browns of her boyfriend. She reached up with slightly numb hands and took off her headphones.

“Hey,” Tai said softly and gave her a warm smile, “mom and dad have just left.”

Rather unsteadily she sat up and placed her headphones on the nightstand; hitting pause on her music player in the process. “Hey, yourself,” she replied, her voice sounding as though she had just woken up from a long sleep.

“Have you been lying here since you got home?” her boyfriend asked playfully.

“Yeah, pretty much. I just needed to try and get away from everything. If I’d had my way, I would not have gone to school today and just lay here and listened to music.”

Tai let out a low whistle, “you can actually do that? How do you manage to just lie hear and listen for that long? Don’t you get restless?”

Kari shook her head, “no. I just close my eyes and let the music take me away. If you hadn’t disturbed me, I probably would have kept going until I ran out of albums.” She swung her slightly stiff legs over the edge of the bed and planted her feet on the floor. She gave it a few moments before she stood up.

“If you want, I can leave you alone?”

She let out a light laugh, “no, it’s ok. I’d rather spend the time with you.”

“Do you want to order some take out then?” Tai asked as, on cue, his stomach making a light noise.

Kari made a quick check-in with her own stomach, before replying, “not quite yet. I’m not hungry enough.” She then looked her boyfriend up and down. Just seeing him standing there, with his mass of messy hair, brilliant chocolate eyes and cute smile, reminded her of just how good it felt when they joined together as one. She sighed internally. Tonight might be the last chance they had to be intimate for a long time. “Tai,” she said softly.

“Yeah?”

Kari met his gaze. “I want to have sex tonight… it might be the last chance we get for a while and I want one more memory of how amazing it feels.”

Before Tai even spoke, she was already undressing him with her eyes. The deep-seated hunger she felt to have him quickly taking hold.

He gave her a smile, “I’d like that too. Do you want to play a video game just now, then have something to eat before we…”

Kari swiftly cut him off, “no.” In a flash, she closed the short distance between them. “I want you now!” she said firmly, as her hands wrapped themselves around his torso and she pressed her lips against his own.

It took nothing more to turn her boyfriend on and soon they were a tangle of limbs as they tore each other’s clothes off amidst a flurry of passionate kisses.

##

Everything about tonight felt wrong to Yuuko Kamiya. The temperature outside was the highest it had been for weeks (for the time of day), yet she felt cold to her core. She’d put on a nice dress and applied her makeup perfectly, yet she could not recall ever feeling so horrible. And while she had left her children at home alone countless times over the years, never before had she been so concerned about what might be going on in her absence. Earlier in the day, she’d taken the foolish notion that, if she permanently stayed in the apartment while Tai and Kari were at home, then they could never do anything indecent.

Yuuko shook her head upon reminding herself of this idiotic idea. She and Susumu had talked the matter over three times since Thursday and each time come to the consensus that they needed to do this for the sake of their children. She took a deep breath. I’m doing this for Tai and Kari’s sake, she said to herself. They’re making a huge mistake and need to be stopped before it completely ruins their lives. She reached out and took hold of her husband’s hand.

“Are you ok?” he asked with concern.

“No,” she replied truthfully. “I hate this situation. I hate the thought of what Tai and Kari may or may not do while we are out and I hate the fact that we’re doing this to try and catch them in the act of…” Images of Tai and Kari kissing, that quickly became more sordid, filled her mind and she shuddered. The idea of coming home to deliberately try and catch them kissing, or worse, somehow still felt wrong. It was not a sight she wished to see.

“I know,” Susumu replied and gave her hand a light squeeze, “but we’ve talked about this and we don’t have a choice. We need to put a stop to whatever is going on between them before it irreparably damages their lives.”

Yuuko sighed, “I know, you’re right. But that doesn’t mean I have to like it.”

“I don’t like it either.” He reached out and put an arm around her shoulder. “But we have to do this.”

Neither of them said anything else as they continued to walk towards the restaurant. They’d discussed in detail how they were going to do this the previous night and eventually decided that the best course of action would be to actually go out for dinner. Her husband had told Tai and Kari that they would be home by twelve at breakfast, then reminded the former before they had left. That gave her children five and a half hours alone. It was a wide time frame to operate in, but if they had given the kids less, they might not risk doing something indecent for fear that they would be caught. However, they had sat and narrowed that window down to roughly two and a half hours, based on two assumptions 1) Tai and Kari would order food sometime within the first two hours, have to wait on it being delivered and then eat it and 2) they would not risk doing anything after 11 pm, in case she and Susumu arrived home slightly earlier than expected. That gave them a time between roughly eight-thirty and eleven in which to catch them. They’d decided to go with half-past-nine. Enough time for them to actually have dinner and get home and it not appear suspicious, should they fail to catch them doing something indecent. In that event, she and Susumu had agreed to put their early homecoming down to her not feeling well after dinner. They would then have to try again at some later point in time. She sincerely hoped it would not come to that. For she just wanted this horrible business to be over.

Following her husband’s lead, Yuuko stepped through the door he held open for her and into the restaurant. Regardless of how good it might be, she knew that this was one meal she would not enjoy. 

##

Kari pushed Tai down to the mattress, both of them panting and struggling for breath and they hadn’t even done it yet. With her teeth, she ripped open the condom packet, pulled it out and pinched the tip. She gave him a devilish grin as she placed the rubber over the tip of his solid penis and rolled it down the shaft. Picking up the bottle of lube, she squeezed some onto her hand and began to rub it all over her boyfriend’s dick. He let out a series of low moans. The excess she rubbed over her opening.

“Don’t cum now, Tai, or I’ll get very pissed off with you,” she said as she moved into position. “And you don’t want me pissed off at you.”

On all the previous occasions, Tai had been on top, which had been fair enough. They’d only just started having full-blown sex and the vanilla missionary position had seemed like the best option until her vagina had acclimatised to having something as wide as her boyfriend’s cock thrust into it. And now it had. She’d not felt an ounce of pain or discomfort the last two times they had done it. Meaning that tonight, she got to be on top. Grabbing his erect penis in one hand, Kari lined it up with the opening to her vagina and slowly slid herself down atop it. Immediately she could feel the warmth radiating from it as it filled her up inside.

“Urgh,” she moaned, her eyes glazing over for a second.

Beneath her, Tai too let out a groan, “mmph.”

Then she started to ride him. Up and down she slid on his penis, each and every thrust sending pulses of pleasure zipping through her body. Oh god, this felt so good! Faster and faster she plunged her hips down atop him, while Tai quickly matched her rhythm with thrusts of his own. Extasy exploding inside her, Kari seized her own breasts and began to furiously rub them.

“Uh, uh, uh,” she cried out as she dug her nails into her soft mounds, “fuck yeah! Argh!”

Kari was completely unaware of what her boyfriend was doing when she felt his penis suddenly expand inside her. It was enough to send her over the edge and she yelled, “ARGH, TAI!” as she came hard. If she’d had any capacity for rational thought, she might have questioned why, unlike on the second time they had done it at New Year, she had not felt a slightly warm sensation shoot up inside her when her boyfriend had orgasmed.

When eventually she came down from her enormous high, Kari flopped down atop her boyfriend. She could hear his heavy breathing as she felt his now flaccid penis slide out of her; it matched her own. This was the third time out of five that they had mutually climaxed, which either meant they were supper compatible or were doing something right. She didn’t care which. It just felt sooo good.

“How was that?” Tai eventually asked her. She felt him raise a hand and brush some strands of her lit-match hair out of her eyes.

Kari gave him a warm smile as she opened her eyes to stare into his. “It felt amazing,” she replied. “How about you?”

Her boyfriend returned the smile, “I think we got our good memory.” His stomach chose that moment to let off a loud rumble.

“I think we need to get you some food,” she laughed. “Why don’t you go order us some take out, then join me in the shower?”

“Sounds like a good idea to me,” Tai replied with a grin. “There’s just one problem.”

“What’s that?”

“You need to get your cute and sexy sweaty butt off of me.”

They both laughed and she gave him a playful punch in the arm as she sat up. The sudden motion made her feel slightly dizzy and a bit nauseous. Placing a hand against the wall, Kari steadied herself and took in a long slow breath. Whether it passed on its own or because she was determined not to let anything ruin what may be their last night alone together, she did not know. However, by the time she stood up, the sensation had faded.

“Are you ok?” Tai asked, a look of concern spreading across his face.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” she lied, deliberately evading his gaze. “I just felt a bit dizzy when I sat up. Guess my body had not quite recovered from orgasming. I’ll see you in the shower,” she added, before briskly heading for the door.

##

Dinner had been a grim affair and, in hindsight, Yuuko felt they should have just gone to a bar instead. She doubted she would have drunk any less and there would have been no food for her to move about a plate. Her appetite had been virtually non-existent. By the time the check had come, she had been glad to leave, despite what they were potentially heading home to. Outside, she clung to her husband’s arm as they began a slow walk home. Her gaze drifted up to his expressionless face that was focused straight ahead. While Susumu would never admit it, Yuuko knew that this whole affair was hurting him inside too. She could see it in his eyes.

As they walked, Yuuko’s mind uncontrollably started to do what it had been doing at every spare moment since seeing Kari wearing those Digital Punk jeans; blaming herself and Susumu for what had happened. It was their fault, it had to have been. They had allowed Tai and Kari to become too close. Kept them in the same room until he was sixteen and she thirteen. Left Tai to look after Kari too many times, thus not allowing either of them to go out and be with other people. Not to mention the whole Digital World affair. Who knew how traumatic that experience might have been for them? They could have seen and done things that they could only ever talk about with each other and the few others that had been with them. Why had she, Susumu or any of the other parents not thought about sending the children to some form of counselling?

She should have seen this coming… should have prevented it from happening. Despite what her husband had said on Thursday, the warning signs had been there. Tai paying for Kari to get her hair dyed had been the start of it, she was sure of it. Since that weekend, they had started doing things together that they had not done since they were a lot younger. Her children had re-forged a relationship, only this time it was not the innocent sibling relationship they’d had before. And she had not even thought to question it. As their mother, it was her responsibility to look after them, protect them, teach them right and wrong about the world, people and relationships. She had utterly failed them as a mother and as a result, they had fallen into an indecent relationship with one another.

Tears began to nip the corners of Yuuko’s eyes and she had to fight to stop them from running down her cheeks. After tonight, both her children would almost certainly end up hating her and Susumu. And that thought more than any other threatened to shatter her heart. Only they had no other choice. If there had been any other out that might prevent Tai and Kari from hating her, even if it meant sacrificing her own life, she would have taken it in a heartbeat.

Yuuko’s eyes stared out into the streetlamp lit distance. She could just make out the shadowy mass of concrete and glass that was their apartment building. The destruction of her family unit was only about ten minutes away.

##

Tai stretched his legs and arms out to their full extent as Kari cuddled into him on the sofa. Allowing his limbs to relax, he draped an arm around his girlfriend; she nuzzled against his neck. After having a rather steamy shower, the couple had settled down on the sofa to watch The History of Trunks, while they waited for the Chinese food he’d ordered to arrive. When it did, they’d eaten the lot. Sex was hungry work after all. Afterwards, they’d watched the rest of the film.

He ran his fingers softly through Kari’s lit-match hair. The thought of not being able to spend evenings like this with her did not bear thinking about. Except he couldn’t escape such thoughts. Come tomorrow, their parents would know about their relationship and then all hell would most likely break loose. And as much as he wanted to avoid, ignore or just plain deny it, Kari had been spot on at the start of the evening. This may very well be their last night together for a long time.

Tai felt his girlfriend’s slender fingers in his own hair and he turned to look at her. His chocolate eyes met with those brilliant reddish-browns and a wave of love and warmth washed over him. No matter what happened, for him, home would always be the place where he could find those eyes. He reached over and planted a tender kiss on her soft, warm lips.

“I love you,” he said after the kiss had ended.

She kissed him back, the gentle movements of those delicate lips drowning him in desire and setting his soul on fire. “I love you too,” Kari said softly.

Tai could feel the want, no, the need to join with her begin to build inside of him once more. It wasn’t just about sex. In fact, even he did not know the full depth and complexity of it. Only that he needed to be with her and that any minute that he did not purposely choose to be apart from her was one more that they’d lost. His eyes drifted to the clock on the wall; it was only 9:20. That meant they had just over an hour and a half in which they could safely be together as a couple. He looked back at his girlfriend. “Want to make one more amazing memory?” he asked, desperately hoping she was not tired out from earlier.

Kari gave him a devilish smile, “is that your way of trying to talk me back into the bedroom?”

Tai grinned at her, “if it’ll work, then yes.”

His girlfriend let out an elongated sigh, “and I’d just gotten comfy too… oh well…” In a flash, her arms wrapped themselves around him and their lips met.

Hmm, not this time sister, Tai thought as he planted his feet on the floor and in one fluid motion, stood up, twisted and scooped her up off the sofa. The entire motion seemed to catch her by surprise and he used the opportunity to take control of the kiss. Pushing his tongue into her mouth, Tai began to explore the inside, while carefully navigating them through the main living area and into Kari’s bedroom. Placing her down on the bed, he climbed on top of her and immediately began to unfasten the toggles on her green, Japanese silk pyjamas. He had just undone the last one and pulled the jacket open to reveal her breasts, when he felt her hands grip the bottom of his t-shirt. Next second, his vision became obscured and his arms temporarily trapped as she hauled it over his head. He had to sit up in order to wrestle out of it. By the time he had tossed it to the floor, Kari too had sat up enough to slip out of her jacket.

Naked torso pressing against his girlfriend’s, Tai found her lips once more and their flame-like dance began again. His hands found her breasts and he began to caress them with gusto. He then felt his girlfriend start to rub his back and when he pinched her nipples, she retaliated with her fingernails. Determined not to be outdone by her this time, he ran his hands and tongue down her body until he reached the waistband of her trousers. Pulling them down, he felt her neatly trimmed bush tickle his lips slightly as he opened his mouth and began to lap her up. Each and every moan he elicited form her was music to Tai’s ears. He enjoyed pleasuring her almost as much as the sensations of ecstasy he felt when she played with him.

“Urgh, no fair,” Kari moaned, as his tongue found her clit. He sucked it hard for that comment, causing her to yelp. “Damnit, Tai, I want to play too,” she cried out amidst another series of moans.

He looked up at her from his position in between her legs and grinned, “not this time, Missy. For once, you’re going to be a good girl and just enjoy yourself.”

“Make… ARGH!” Kari yelled as he furiously wiggled his tongue over her clit, while at the same time his fingers found her nipples and pinched.

Quickly, Tai withdrew his head from between her legs and flipped her over onto her stomach. From her nightstand, he grabbed a condom and the bottle of lube. He had to drop both onto the bed and give her nipples another hard pinch to stop her from trying to wriggle away. “Oh no you don’t,” he said playfully, as she writhed in pleasure under his touch.

He then planted his left hand between her legs and pinched her clit between thumb and forefinger. Anytime she tried to move, he would squeeze them together as he used his other hand and teeth to open the condom, slide it over his erect penis and lube up. Shifting his left hand to her hip, he guided himself to her opening and slipped inside.

##

The climb up the stairs to their floor of the apartment building felt akin to climbing the steps to the gallows for Yuuko. This was it. If their plan worked, this was the point that everything would change. The moment she and Susumu stepped through their front door, the happy family life she had enjoyed for the vast majority of the last eighteen years would be over. She clutched desperately to her husband’s arm. He would be all she would have left and she could only hope that it would be enough.

Susumu met her fearful gaze. “We can still turn around, go to a bar and come back at midnight,” he said quietly. “Tai and Kari are smart kids. Maybe if we talk to them about it, they’ll listen to reason and stop.”

Yuuko shook her head. The idea was tempting, so much so that she almost turned around on the spot. It was only her maternal instincts that stopped her. She had completely failed her children as a mother and if there was only one thing she ever managed to get right for them, this had to be it. This relationship they were in could ruin their lives irreparably and so she had to ensure that it ended. Even if it cost her their love. “No,” she finally managed to say in a shaky whisper. “Tai and Kari are smart kids and yet they’ve still chosen to pursue this. By whatever bastardised logic they’ve used, I know that they believe what they are doing is right. If we confront them with what we have, they’ll deny everything and make sure to be extra careful from now on. They won’t stop.”

Her husband lowered his head. Perhaps he had been hoping, like she had, that there was another way out of this dire situation. “Ok… here we go. We’d probably be best to take our shoes off before we step inside. Hard soles and heels make too much noise on wood.”

She reached down and pulled off her high-heels and almost yelped when she felt the cold stone of the landing beneath her nylon covered feet. She watched Susumu do the same before he lightly took hold of the door handle. Ever so gently, her husband pulled the handle down. There was the lightest of clicks as the locking mechanism operated. He then tentatively pushed the door inwards and out of its frame; it opened almost silently. Taking care to step as lightly as she could, Yuuko followed him across the threshold. She sat her shoes down atop the rack but did not bother with her indoor ones, as her husband closed the door behind him with the same level of care.

From down the hallway, she could hear untoward noises coming from Kari’s room. Oh God! she thought as she stepped into the main living area. She had hoped to simply catch them making out. However, fate it seemed had decided to treat her to the full show. The colour drained from her face and she froze on the spot. She couldn’t do this. She could not deliberately walk in on her children while they were having sex with each other. Susumu took hold of her hand and guided her onward. Against her will, yet at the same time unable to bring herself to stop her husband, Yuuko was ushered through the main living area and down the hallway to Kari’s bedroom door.

“…Urgh… Urgh… Urgh… ARGH! TAI… YES… URGH… JUST LIKE… THAT! ARGH!”

The sound of her daughter screaming in delight chilled Yuuko to the bone and she wanted to run. To run from the apartment and the excruciating sounds of her son fucking her daughter and just keep going until she collapsed from exhaustion. This could not be happening. No, this was not happening. Beyond that wooden door, her children were not having sex. This was all just some twisted nightmare that soon she would wake up from. Only she never did. In abject horror, she could only watch as Susumu reached out, seized the door handle and in one fluid motion, threw the door open. 


	81. Pt6 08) Disintegration

**Part Six: Secret No Longer**

**Chapter Eight: Disintegration  
**

Without warning, the bedroom door flew open and both Tai and Kari’s heads turned when they heard the sound of it hitting the wall. Stood in the doorway, expressions of horror smeared over their faces were their parents. The collective hearts of all four individuals were in their owner’s mouths as colours drained from faces. And for a few moments of deathly silence, the two couples just stared at each other. Then everything seemed to happen at once.

“Mom…” Tai and Kari stammered together, “…dad…”

“WHAT THE HELL!” Susumu yelled, even though he had known full well what he was about to witness before opening the door.

However, the sight of Tai fucking Kari had been too much for Yuuko and she turned from the door and ran towards the kitchen. A wave of nausea swept over her and she retched. She just managed to get her head over the sink before her meagre stomach contents spewed forth. Her breaths came in sharp rasps as she struggled to take in enough air. The sight of her children doing **that** had been far worse than she had imagined.

Back in the bedroom and the blood had quickly drained from Tai’s penis, causing it to slip out of his sister’s vagina. He scrambled back to allow Kari to get off of all fours, which she did immediately.

“Both of you, put some clothes on, NOW!” Susumu barked, even though Tai and Kari were already hurriedly pulling on their pyjamas. It had been the only thing he could think to say. Any thoughts or ideas of how he had intended to handle the situation had evaporated the moment he saw his children.

“Dad, we need to talk with you and mom,” Tai then managed to say, as he struggled into his shorts. His limbs were trembling and he could feel his right wrist begin to itch. Of all the ways for their parents to find out about him and Kari, this surely must have been the worst.

“We already know about you and your sister’s depraved relationship,” Susumu spat. He could feel anger coursing through himself. He’d wanted to be reasonable, to try and understand the how and why this whole affair had come about, but seeing his children fucking like that had felt like one massive fuck you to everything he had ever tried to teach them. Both Tai and Kari were smart, sensible kids and they would have known how wrong incest was. Yet despite all their common sense and everything he and Yuuko had taught them, they had still chosen such an amoral, reckless and downright idiotic course of action. Both of them **should** have known better. Only, in hindsight, he should never have used the word depraved.

“WE’RE NOT DEPRAVED,” Kari yelled as she spontaneously combusted. Her fists clenched and her body began shaking with rage. She had known her parents would not take kindly to finding out the truth, but to hear one of them use such a word to describe something she considered to be beautiful and pure, proved to be more than she could stand. “TAI AND I ARE IN LOVE. I FEEL THE SAME WAY ABOUT HIM AS YOU DO ABOUT MOM.”

For a brief moment, both Tai and Susumu looked at Kari, absolutely stunned at the sheer force with which her outburst had been delivered. There was not a shred of the innocent little girl she had once been. Instead, she stood as a strong, fearsome woman, who was fully grown in maturity, if not in years.

Out in the kitchen, Yuuko finally managed to draw in a proper breath. Picking up the first mug that came to hand, she filled it with cold water from the tap and took small sips in-between subsequent breaths. She shuddered upon hearing Kari’s yell. The tone her daughter had used, reminded Yuuko of the one the girl had turned on her after she herself had lost her temper and slapped Tai all those months ago. Not only that, but the content of Kari’s words confirmed the fear she had shared with her husband before they entered the apartment; their children believed what they were doing was right. She set the mug back down on the countertop. This had to end tonight, for the sake of both her children, even if it cost her their love. Which meant she had to go back in there.

Back in the bedroom, his daughter’s outburst had served only to enrage Susumu further. If she thought that the love shared between two teenagers, one of whom was still in middle school no less, could be compared to that of a couple who had been together for over twenty years, then she had just proved her own naivety. And that was before even considering the moral implications of incest. It seemed his own assessment of her had been well wide of the mark. Unfortunately, the result of this was for him to react to her as though she were a child. “Watch your tone, young Lady,” he snapped, before rounding on his son. Hopefully, Tai would have some semblance of sense about him. “This ends now, Tai. Do you understand? Now!”

“No,” Tai said defiantly, his tone level but firm. He had suspected this would be the immediate, knee jerk reaction from his parents, regardless of how they found out and he needed to stay strong and weather the storm. Perhaps then he and Kari would have the chance to explain their side of the story and how they felt about one another. Unfortunately, his father’s reaction to his sister had not helped matters. 

“DON’T TRY AND TREAT ME LIKE I’M FOUR, DAD. AND HOW DARE YOU TRY AND DISMISS ME, JUST BECAUSE YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND HOW WE FEEL.”

“KARI KAMIYA, BE SILENT,” Susumu yelled at his daughter. He had heard his son’s response, but his daughter’s second outburst succeeded in momentarily diverting his attention.

It had been a funny thing for Tai to be the one who had managed to keep his cool. Unfortunately, his father’s complete dismissal of his sister quickly put pay to that. “DON’T TRY AND SILENCE HER, DAD. JUST BECAUSE YOU DON’T LIKE WHAT SHE’S SAYING. KARI AND I ARE IN LOVE.”

Before she managed to reach Kari’s bedroom, Yuuko heard the room descend into a mass of yelling voices, to the point that she could no longer discern what was being said. It did not matter, for she intended to take control of the situation. Her husband may have been the bread-winner in the household, but when it came to family matters, she ruled the roost. The moment she crossed the threshold of her daughter’s bedroom, Yuuko raised her voice above those of her assembled family and said, “THAT'S ENOUGH, ALL OF YOU!” The room fell silent and all eyes turned to stare at the matriarch. There was no question as to where the power lay in this household. When Yuuko Kamiya spoke, everyone stopped to listen. Her voice lowered to an acceptable level, though the tone remained authoritative, when she focused her attention on her children, “I know enough about the relationship the two of you are engaged in, to know that it is unhealthy for you both. Therefore, it ends immediately. If we need to send either of you to counselling or for therapy because of it, then so be it. But any and all romantic interactions between the two of you end now. Is that clear?”

Tai reached out and put a hand on Kari's shoulder. He met her gaze and it was enough to stop her from lashing out again. He then focused it on his mother. Somehow, she had found out about their relationship before tonight, which meant that this evening had been a deliberate set up to try and catch them in the act of doing something ‘inappropriate’. Well, he and his sister had fallen for a trap neither had seen coming. But that did not change anything. The only thing that mattered now was trying to make their parents understand how he and Kari felt about one another. “I’m sorry, Mom, but we already tried that and it made us both miserable. You saw how bad Kari was in December and to be honest, I felt the same only I managed to hide it better.”

Kari took the hand her brother had placed on her shoulder, lowered it and interlocked their fingers. A small gesture, but a visible sign that they would not easily be parted. “You talk about our relationship being unhealthy for us, Mom, but the truth is, not being together is far worse. I was depressed for a full year before I eventually admitted how I felt to Tai. And ever since then, bar the five weeks after we split up, I’ve actually been happy.”

Yuuko lowered her gaze and shook her head slightly. She had expected this sort of reaction. Tai and Kari were, at present, beyond any form of sane reasoning. And it was quickly becoming apparent that both her children’s mental wellbeing had suffered at some point; just another thing to add to her list of failures. Regardless, they’d somehow found their way to each other and like when they were children, used one another as emotional crutches. Internally, Yuuko shed a tear. This indecent relationship between her children had to end now, for their own sakes, only it was not going to be pretty. Not to mention that both would almost certainly need some sort of therapy, but that could wait. She brought her gaze up to meet that of her son. She already knew the outcome, but felt she had to try the diplomatic approach first. “Tai, go to your room,” Yuuko said in a firm, no-nonsense manner. “I don’t want you near your sister until your father and I can figure out how we’re going to handle this situation. Is that understood?”

Tai stood defiant and tightened his grip on his sister’s hand. It did not seem likely that their parents would be willing to entertain reason at the moment, however, he at least needed to try. “No, Mom,” he began, drawing on his courage to face any adversity. “Kari and I won’t be separated, just because you and dad don’t approve of our relationship.”

“We’re in love and want to be together,” Kari then added, having managed to reign in her un-tempered emotions. While she felt slightly calmer, for the moment, she sensed that things would soon explode once more. Her mother would not willingly take no for an answer.

Susumu had also managed to temper his anger in the moments since his wife had entered. However, he had a bad feeling about where this was headed and a single glance at Yuuko’s grim facial expression confirmed his fears. They were going to have to physically separate their children. This was going to be problematic. Tai had matured into a strong young man and would probably put up a strong fight if he could not subdue him quickly. He did not wish to hurt his son but knew that there would be little choice. Instead, it would become about inflicting the minimum amount of injury that he could. He looked Tai up and down. If, after separating the kid’s, he could deliver one quick, hard blow to his son’s abdomen, it might be enough to subdue him. He could only hope that the boy would not see it coming.

Yuuko looked between her children and sighed. The damage she did here to her relationship with both, would probably be irreparable. She could only hope that somehow, someway, that proved not to be the case. “So be it,” she said in a defeated tone. Catching the eye of her husband, she nodded.

Before either Tai or Kari knew what was happening, their parents lunged at them.

Caught completely unawares, Kari felt her mom’s arms wrap tightly around her torso and upper arms. Instinctively, she began to thrash to try and throw her off, but this was made more difficult due to the fact that one of her hands was still interlocked with Tai’s. The very link her parents were now trying to break. “Mom, let go!” she hissed, as she twisted her shoulders this way and that, but to no avail.

Tai’s situation was just as bad, if not worse. His father had tackled him around the shoulders and used the momentum to force him away from Kari. His arm was now at full stretch as he tried to maintain contact with her. “Fuck off, Dad,” he yelled in anger as he struggled to keep his footing.

The element of surprise had worked exactly as the Kamiya parents had hoped. By forcibly dragging their children in opposite directions, their bonded hands quickly began to strain.

“This is for you own good, Kari,” Yuuko said firmly as she tried to pin her daughter’s arms to her sides.

“You could have done this the easy way, Tai,” Susumu barked as he pressed home his advantage against his stumbling son.

The pain in both Tai and Kari’s extended arms quickly mounted as they were forced further apart. And despite their best efforts, their fingers began to part.

“Tai!” Kari yelled when she felt the last sliver of her brother’s fingers slip from her grasp.

“Kari!” Tai called back as he staggered backwards. Suddenly he felt his father’s grip around his shoulders vanish. As he struggled to maintain his footing, he quickly became aware of the slight distance that existed between his father and himself. It was only at the last moment when he saw the man’s fist fly towards his gut, did he realise what was happening. He had no time in which to defend himself.

Kari, who was still struggling against her mother, could see exactly what her father was about to do. “NO, DAD!” she yelled frantically, but it was too late.

The blow hit Tai’s unguarded stomach and he doubled over as pain flooded through him.

“I’m sorry, Son,” Susumu uttered grimly as he quickly grabbed Tai’s right arm, spun him around and placed it in a lock.

“TAI!” Kari cried out as she furiously intensified her attempts to break free of her mother’s hold. She could not believe that her father had just struck her brother and with what appeared to have been a good deal of force.

Yuuko struggled to maintain her grip around her daughter’s torso and took a few scuffed kicks to her shins for good measure. Eventually, just as Kari managed to break one of her hands free, she did the only thing she could think of and shoved her daughter backwards against the edge of the bed. The girl’s knees hit the woodwork and the momentum sent both mother and daughter crashing down onto the mattress.

Tai struggled for breath as the pain continued to ravage his body. There had been little restraint in the blow his father had dealt him. Disorientated and with his vision obscured by watering eyes, he could do nothing to prevent the second pain that came from his right arm as his father forced it into the lock.

“Move,” Susumu said with more force than he had intended, as he increased the pressure on his son’s arm to indicate that he was not messing about.

There was only a very brief moment of resistance, more to do with the surprise of the situation, before Tai complied and began walking forward. He could barely make out where he was going and required his father to guide him out of Kari’s room. He did not even get the chance to take one last look at his sister. Out in the hallway, it did not take long for his father to manoeuvre him into his own bedroom. He was given a moderate shove as his arm was released. Staggering forward, Tai desperately tried to remain on his feet, but quickly fell to his knees. Bent over on the floor, he struggled to take in a proper breath; his entire abdomen still hurting like hell.

Susumu looked down at his son and felt a conflicting mix of guilt and anger. While he had managed to subdue him without much issue, it had taken a fair amount of force and caused the boy an injury that he would probably feel for days to come. It had been necessary, he told himself. The pain Tai felt at this moment in time paled in comparison to the emotional damage he would endure, should his incestuous relationship with his sister be allowed to continue. He glanced around the room and his eyes fell upon the desk, where his son’s cell phone and laptop sat. He walked over to it and picked both of them up. They needed to prevent all contact between their children until such a time as they could figure out what to do with them Although he suspected that may need to be an indefinite thing. Susumu then headed for the door. “I’m sorry it had to come to this, Tai,” he said as he took one last look at his son’s crumpled form. He then removed the key, closed the door and locked it behind him.

Back in Kari’s room and Yuuko was having difficulty in keeping her daughter pinned to the mattress.

“LET GO OF ME!” Kari yelled in frustration, as she bucked her hips and tried to throw her mother off.

“I’m sorry, Kari, but this is for your own good,” Yuuko hissed, as she caught hold of her daughter’s one free hand and pinned it to the mattress once more.

“FUCK YOU AND WHAT YOU THINK IS FOR MY OWN GOOD!”

Susumu shook his head in disdain as he walked into his daughter’s room in time to hear her latest curse. Quickly, he found her cell phone and laptop and removed them. “Yuuko, leave her,” he said from the doorway upon his return.”

It was a struggle for Yuuko to disentangle herself from her daughter’s flailing limbs and manage to stand. Breathless, she hastily made for the door.

The second her mother was off of her, Kari sprang to her feet. “OH NO YOU DON’T” she screeched when she realised that her parents intended to lock her inside. Diving forward, she caught her mom’s trailing arm and tried to haul her back across the threshold. Only one thought filling her mind; she had to get to Tai.

Yuuko yelped when she felt her daughter yank on her arm and attempt to pull her back into the room. She struggled to free herself, but Kari’s grip was too strong.

Not willing to allow the incident to be prolonged, Susumu put one arm around his wife and pulled her towards himself. The second she crossed the threshold, he then shoved his daughter in the chest with his other hand. Her grip on his wife released and she staggered backwards.

Kari felt a sharp pain in her chest as a result of the blow her father had just dealt her, but it was not enough to shatter her adrenaline-fuelled state. As soon as she regained her balance, she darted towards the closing door. However, she was too late. The door shut and she heard the click of the lock sound just before she battered her fists against it. “LET ME OUT!” she yelled at the top of her voice, as she continued to pound the woodwork. She grabbed the handle and tried to wrench the door open, but the lock held it firm. “YOU CAN’T DO THIS TO US!”

When it quickly became apparent that she was not getting out of her room without her parents say so, Kari felt the adrenaline drain from her. Tears welled up in her eyes on account of having just been forcibly separated from her brother. How could their parents do this to them? They had not even been willing to sit down and talk, electing instead to go with the nuclear option. Not to mention the fact that her father had injured Tai. At this very moment in time, he was probably lying in pain and desperately needed her. IT WASN’T FAIR!

Pressing her back against the door, Kari slowly slid down it and to the floor, tears now streaming down her cheeks. What happened now was anyone’s guess. And she could not bear the thought of not knowing when she might see Tai again. That night she would eventually fall asleep where she lay from exhaustion.

Across the hallway and locked inside his own bedroom, Tai could barely spare a thought for anything beyond his abdomen, such was the pain that still engulfed his mind from his father’s blow. His breathing was ragged and his arms began to shake as they struggled to support him. In the end, they gave way and he collapsed onto the cold wooden floor with a heavy thud. He too would spend an uncomfortable night on his own bedroom floor.

Now that they had successfully separated their children, Yuuko and Susumu felt physically and emotionally drained. If asked, both would certainly agree that tonight had been the most difficult night of their lives as parents, perhaps ever. Unfortunately, they did not know what to do now and were in no state to discuss it. With barely a word said between them, they went to bed.

That night, no one in the Kamiya household had a restful sleep. 


	82. Pt6 09) Pain

**Part Six: Secret No Longer**

**Chapter Nine: Pain**

Tai awoke to find himself sprawled out on the cold wooden floor of his bedroom. It took his brain several moments to get its bearings. What the… he thought in confusion. Then the memories of the previous night came flooding back to him. The wonderful evening he'd spent with Kari, being caught by their parents while they were having sex, the subsequent fight and... He winced as he tried to pick himself up, pain rushed from his abdomen to greet him. It was intense enough to cause him to cease the action for now. Damnit, Dad, he cursed under his breath. The strength of that blow had been excessive. However, he supposed that had been the point. His father had clearly not wanted to risk a full-blown fight with him.

Grimacing and bracing himself for the flare-up of pain, Tai pushed himself up off of the floor and onto his knees. His stomach hurt like hell, but he managed to suppress it enough. He rested for a few moments, taking a few deep breaths, before forcing himself to stand; the pain intensifying. It probably wouldn't be so bad if he had not taken several blows to the gut the previous week, which may not have fully healed. But his father would not have known that when delivering the blow. With difficulty, he staggered over to the door and discovered that it had been locked. It was no surprise. His parents were not about to exert that much effort in separating him from Kari, only to let them go about the apartment as they wished. He turned around, his gaze falling upon his empty desk surface. Bastard! His father had taken both his cell phone and laptop. He was completely cut off from his sister!

Last night’s anger reignited inside Tai and he hammered a fist against the door with enough force that the bang echoed around the deathly silent room. He knew it would not likely gain any attention, but it felt good; a show of defiance. And if it had woken his parents, all the better. Never in his life could Tai remember genuinely hating either his mom or dad… now he hated both. Only this was a newfound level of hatred that he had never known before. Never when he’d thought about how his parent might react to the news, had he pondered how he might feel about their response. Well, now he knew and it was not pretty. 

How dare they think that they could lock him and his sister in their bedrooms. What did they hope to accomplish? That somehow, if they kept them locked up long enough, they would suddenly shed the feelings they had for each other? Tai sighed as he sat down on his bed. Their parents had completely ignored anything he and Kari had tried to tell them. And he doubted they would be willing to listen come morning. His eyes wandered to the alarm clock; 4:35 am. There was nothing he could do at present. Climbing under the covers, his head hit the pillow and his eyes closed. He felt absolutely exhausted. Only sleep did not take him immediately. His mind continually whirring with thoughts about how his parents had reacted, what would happen now and above all, about what state Kari would be in. When eventually he did slip into unconsciousness, it was not a restful sleep.

##

It was about six am when Yuuko Kamiya finally gave up on the notion of getting any meaningful sleep. Having lay awake for the majority of the night, she felt both physically and emotionally drained. Yet even in this state, sleep would not come. Electing not to wake her husband, if he was able to rest then good for him, she silently slipped on her house shoes and left the bedroom. Out in the hallway, a cold chill gripped her, even though the apartment was suitably warm. As she passed them by, her eyes lingered on the doors to Tai and Kari’s bedrooms and the keys that resided in the locks. The memory of last night doused her like a bucket of cold water. She and Susumu had been forced to separate their children and then lock them inside their respective bedrooms. How on earth had it come to this?

From out of nowhere, a voice from the darkest recesses of her mind, whispered to her, _“it’s all Tai’s fault.”_

Yuuko stopped dead on hearing the thought that she knew had come from some part of her own mind. “Shut up!” she snapped internally. There was no evidence to suggest that this was all Tai’s fault.

Making her way to the kitchen, she set about making a pot of coffee. By the time Susumu woke, she would not be surprised if she had drunk the whole thing. It was while waiting for the coffee to finish dripping into the pot, that the voice spoke again, _“Tai is the older sibling, the responsible one. He is the one who should have stopped this thing before anything happened.”_

Yuuko almost dropped her mug upon processing that thought. She could not argue with herself on that point at least. Tai **was** the older sibling. He **should** have stopped, no, ensured that something like this never happened.

Before this realisation had properly set in, another point was provided by the voice, _“then again, Tai’s also the irresponsible, reckless one. The one who has a track history of putting his interests first. If there was something in it for him, would he have stopped it?”_

The question shook Yuuko to the core as she filled her mug with thick, black coffee; almost to the point it overflowed. And she knew two things for certain, 1) her son did not have the best track record with relationships and 2) teenage boys could easily become obsessed with sex. Once he had convinced Kari to sleep with him, would Tai have ever have thought to put an end to things? Probably not. Hell, what teenage boy would give up someone who was willingly opening their legs for them? Yuuko shuddered at thinking of her daughter in such terms.

_“That’s not Kari!”_ the voice practically shouted inside her head. _“My daughter is not some common slut! She is a good girl who wouldn’t just open her legs for anyone.”_

Her hand shook as she took a sip from the steaming coffee mug and made her way over to the dining table to sit down. Kari had changed over the past year, that point she could not argue. But even taking that into consideration, she still could not envisage her daughter as having become the sort of girl to engage in casual sex. So why had she been sleeping with her brother?

_“Well… since we know Kari is not a slut, we only have three options. Either Tai has been blackmailing her, he’s coerced, corrupted and deluded her into thinking they are in love or…”_

“NO!” Yuuko yelled internally, already knowing what option three was going to be. While she hated options one and two, she could not bear to think that her children had fallen that far as to genuinely believe that they were in love with each other. In fact, she’d sooner believe that Kari had indeed become a common slut and that this relationship between them was purely depraved casual sex, than have to deal with the possibility that her children had fallen in love with each other.

_“Which brings us back to the original point; it’s all Tai’s fault.”_

Yuuko gulped down some coffee as this thought filled her mind. Kari had always been impressionable, especially when her brother had been involved. Had Tai, for whatever his own depraved reasons might be, manipulated his sister into sleeping with him? She was a good-looking girl and him incapable of keeping a girlfriend for more than a few weeks. Had Tai’s lust for sexual gratification led him to use his influence over his sister in such an untoward manner? It would certainly explain all the gifts he had given her. In fact, had that not been how this whole thing had started; Tai paying for Kari to have her hair dyed?

_“It’s a grim thought, but it fits,” _the voice hissed. _“Kari’s always looked up to her brother and he’s used that to take advantage of her… corrupt her.”_

“I… don’t… know,” Yuuko thought to herself. Her eyes screwed up and she shook her head.

_“It would mean that Kari’s only crime in all of this is her impressionable nature… she’s a victim… a victim of her own nature and of her brother’s selfishness… it wouldn’t be the first time…”_

Images from ten years ago, from memories that she had tried to suppress, worked their way from the deep, dark depths of Yuuko’s mind and forced themselves front and centre. She saw Kari, pale and fragile, lying in a hospital bed and felt the dread of not knowing whether or not her daughter was going to live or die. Then Tai, foolish and frightened and the anger from all those years ago coursed through her like it had happened only yesterday. Her son’s foolish and selfish nature had almost cost Kari her life when she was only five and Yuuko would be damned if she was going to allow him to ruin it now. No matter what, she had to protect Kari at all costs.

##

It was the sound of the key scraping in the lock that initially started to rouse Kari from her fitful slumber. However, when the door opened, it hit her backside, sending a signal of discomfort straight to her brain and caused her eyes to snap open. A brief glance at her surroundings was all it took for the memories of last night to rush to the fore.

“Kari?” her mother asked in surprise from the other side of the door when it failed to open any further.

Kari scrambled across the floor and to her feet. Turning, she saw the door open and her mother enter, a neutral expression on her face.

“How are you feeling?” the woman asked, her voice level, almost friendly.

On hearing her mother’s words, she immediately felt the flames of last night’s anger and rage be stoked inside her. And it was a struggle to keep a lid on them. From her mom’s expression and tone, she sensed the situation could go one of two ways. If she played nice and did as she was told, she would receive better treatment, whatever that might be. However, if she exploded again, her mom may well leave the room and lock the door until she cooled down. “Stiff and sore,” she replied darkly, feeling her limbs ache. She’d lost count of how many times she had slept either all or part of the night on the floor in the past few months.

“I think it was a difficult night for everyone,” her mom said sympathetically, “but it’s over now and we all need to try and move on.”

There was a level of niceness about her mother’s tone that served only to rub Kari the wrong way. Like the woman’s intention was to whitewash over what had happened, apply her own conclusions to it and expect everyone else to fall in line. If that transpired to be the case, she had no intention of pow-wowing, even before she figured out what exactly her mom had decided in her own head. “That’s easy for you to say. You weren’t the one forcibly separated from the person that you love.”

“Oh, Kari, you’re not long turned sixteen,” her mother sighed. “You don’t even know what love is yet. However, we can talk about that later. For now, why don’t you come and have a nice hot shower and some breakfast.”

The patronising nature of the woman’s words was almost enough to cause Kari to combust again. It was almost as bad as the way her father had spoken to her the previous night. She sucked in a slow breath to help steady herself. “Where’s Tai,” she asked, only just managing to stop it sounding like a demand.

Her mom shook her head. “You don’t have to worry about your brother, he’s in his room.”

“How is he?” she cut in before the woman could say anything else.

“He was asleep when we went in. I left him some painkillers for when he wakes up.” Her mother’s lips then thinned somewhat. “I'll make him something to eat when he does.”

“I want to see him.”

“I’m afraid that’s out of the question,” her mother replied, still trying to sound friendly but there was a definite edge to her tone now. “For now, your father and I think it best that you don't see your brother.”

“I want to see him!” she reiterated with force.

“That is not going to happen, Kari,” her mom said firmly, though if she was angry, she hid it well. “Now, how about that shower and some breakfast.”

The continual use of the whitewash felt like turpentine being tossed on the flames of anger that burned inside Kari. However, she knew that further attempts on her part to try and argue with her mom would be liable to result in her remaining locked inside her bedroom. And that would accomplish nothing. She took in a long breath through gritted teeth as she slowly walked towards the door. “Fine,” she said, unable to fully keep the bitterness from her tone, “I’ll go for a shower.” She stalked into the hallway, her eyes immediately drifting towards her brother’s bedroom door; the key was in the lock. Before Kari could even think about darting for it, she felt a hand on her shoulder, the grip light but the intent making itself known.

“Let’s go to the bathroom,” her mom said purposefully.

Kari did not resist when her mother directed her towards the bathroom door. Not only did she have her mom behind her, but she’d caught a brief sight of her father sitting at the dining table. It would be foolish for her to try and make a break for Tai’s room right now. Even if she broke free from her mother, she would not elude her long enough to reach her brother’s room, open the door, get inside and lock it behind her. There would be a struggle, which would allow enough time for her dad to reach them and subdue her. Then it would be back to her own room with the door locked behind her. No, she would need to bide her time, perhaps play along and wait for her parents to lower their guard around her, despite how long that might take. They reached the bathroom and she stepped inside.

“Why don’t you undress, hop in, then I’ll get you some fresh clothes,” her mom then said, releasing her grip on Kari’s shoulder.

Clever, she thought. Her mother wanted to make sure she was in the shower before leaving the room. Granted, truth be told, it came as somewhat of a surprise that the woman did not plan to stand in the doorway the whole time. “Ok,” she said, before crossing to the shower and turning it on. Although she did not like the idea of her mother staring at her as she undressed, Kari chose not to let it bother her. The woman would not likely leave and she could not afford to increase tensions between them if she hoped to get her to let her guard down. She stripped off her pyjamas and climbed into the cubical.

##

Kari stepped out of the bathroom and was ushered down the hall to the dining table by her mother. The shower had been hot and helped ease some of the tension in her stiff limbs. When she’d got out, she had found her ripped black jeans and green weirdo t-shirt waiting for her, along with fresh underwear. She sat down at the table and drew a semi-friendly look from her father.

“Morning, Kari,” he said, his tone slightly stiff and lacking the normal warmth she normally received with such a greeting.

“Don’t talk to me,” Kari snapped back, unable to control herself. A single glance at his face had been all it took to remind her of what he had done the previous night.

Her father seemed to recoil slightly at the savageness of her tone.

“Kari, that is no way to speak to your father,” her mom said at her from halfway between the table and the kitchen. She sounded quite taken aback.

She knew she shouldn’t have reacted like that, but knowing that could not stop the rising anger inside her take root. “He’s lucky I spoke to him at all,” she spat with venom, “he hurt Tai!”

“Kari, try to understand, your brother left your father with no choice last night…”

“He didn’t give Tai a choice!” she yelled at her mother, then rounded on her father. “I saw what you did. The second our hands separated, you hit Tai in the gut then marched him out of my room in an arm lock.” She was seething now and her rage un-tempered. “Now, while Tai is still locked in his room, the two of you are trying to whitewash over what you did and sell me whatever reasoning you’ve decided upon. Well, I’m not buying it.”

“Kari, what your father and I are trying to do is for your own good.”

Kari slammed her palms onto the table surface as she stood up with enough force to send her chair toppling over; it hit the floor with a loud clatter. “If you and dad really cared for us, you would sit down and actually listen to what we have to say, instead of forcibly trying to keep us apart!”

Finally, after having kept her temper in check since waking her up, her mom finally snapped, “that is it, young Lady, you’re going back to your bedroom.”

The last shred of common sense was consumed by the fires of anger that raged inside Kari and she bolted towards the hallway. Feet hammering on the wooden floor, her eyes homed in on her target; Tai’s bedroom door. Her heart pounded inside her chest when she heard the yells of her parents from back in the main living area. She did not waste time with a glance over her shoulder, for the knowledge would do her no good. Skidding to a halt, she had to seize the doorknob in order to stop herself sliding past the door; it cost her precious seconds. Frantically, her fingers found the key in the lock and turned it. The second the lock clicked open, she twisted the handle and burst the door open. Her feet crossed the threshold and… CRASH! Next second Kari found herself sprawled out on the floor inside Tai’s bedroom with her father on top of her.

“LET GO OF ME!” she yelled as her fingers struggled to gain any purchase on the smooth wooden floor. Helplessly she was dragged backwards. Thrashing her body this way and that, she managed to catch her father in the chest with a kick and scamper forward. For a few brief seconds, she thought she had freed herself, only for the man to dive on top of her once more. “TAI, HELP!”

As she was dragged from the room on her hands and knees, Kari saw her mother quickly move around her father and herself to intercept the mass of chocolate brown hair that started to rise form the bed.

“TAI!” she screamed at the top of her voice, just before the door was slammed closed from the inside.

With all her might Kari fought against her dad, but it was no use; he was far bigger and stronger than she was. A few moments later and she found herself back inside her own bedroom, with the door locked behind her. She beat on it for a minute or two but got no response. Seething with rage, she picked up her headphones from the nightstand and thrust them over her ears. Throwing herself down atop the bed, she found The Wall Live on her music player, hit play and turned the volume up loud. It seemed that, like the protagonist of Pink Floyd’s epic, there would be no quick fix to her problems.

##

The sound of his sister screaming roused Tai from his slumber. His bleary eyes opened to the blurred sight of her being dragged from the room by his father. Without thinking, he tried to scramble out of bed to come to her aid, only for the abdominal pain from last night to shoot through him once more and cause him to buckle. Eyes watering, he sucked in a difficult breath as he tried to summon the willpower to overcome the agony. Kari needed his help. Far slower than he would have liked, he steadily began to rise from the mattress. For a moment, his vision began to clear, just in time for him to see the figure of his mother step forward and block his sister and father from view, before another stab of pain hit. Tai screwed up his eyes, felt his arms give way and would have toppled onto the floor had his mother not caught him.

“Don’t try to get up,” his mom said sternly as she lay him back down on the mattress.

“No…” he grunted as he ineffectively tried to resist, “…have… to… help… Kari.”

“Your sister doesn’t need your help,” his mom replied, her tone laced with venom. “You’ve already caused more than enough damage to her for one lifetime.”

“I want to see her,” Tai protested as he tried to sit up again. “Argh!” he received another stab of pain for his efforts.

His mother let go of him and busied herself with something on his bedside table. “That’s not going to happen.”

He lay on his back and took in a few sharp breaths as he waited for the pain to subside again. “You can’t keep us apart,” he growled through gritted teeth.

His mother turned around. “If I have my way, you will not see your sister again. Now,” she held out a small tablet and glass of water, “you can either take this painkiller, which in your present state will probably knock you out for several hours, or you can lie here in agony… and I’m not sure I care which you choose.”

Never before could Tai recall seeing his mother look so deadpan and serious. Add to that the almost sadistic undertone of her words and it was like he was talking to a complete stranger. He’d bore the brunt of her wrath and anger countless times, some of which had been exceptionally serious, but he’d never seen her like this. It seemed the events of last night had taken a serious toll on her. “I’m sorry you had to find out about me and Kari that way,” he began but was swiftly cut off.

“Don’t talk to me about your sister,” his mom snapped, showing a hint of her anger. “I don’t know what you did to seduce her, but the sooner she is free of your corrupting influence, the better.”

“I didn’t seduce her… argh.”

“I don’t want to hear your lies. Now, do you want the painkiller?” 

The image of his mother blurred and he forced himself to nod. The pressure on his stomach then lifted. Unable to properly sit up, Tai had to make do with lifting his head and shoulders enough to allow his mom to deposit the tablet inside his mouth and then bring the cup to his lips. He slowly sipped enough to allow him to swallow the tablet; his mouth tasted like sandpaper. He then waited a few seconds before taking a longer drink. His mom then removed the cup and set it on the bedside table. Without saying another word, she left the room and locked the door behind her. From between the cracks in his drawn blinds, Tai could make out small streaks of daylight. Or perhaps that was all happening inside his own head, as the painkiller quickly took effect and pulled him under into unconsciousness.

##

After having deposited his daughter back inside her bedroom, Susumu had gone to fetch the mail from the box outside and then returned to the dining table and another mug of strong coffee. He sat the collection of three envelopes on the wooden surface and absentmindedly rubbed the spot on his chest where Kari had managed to lay a foot on him; it was actually rather tender. A good thing his daughter had not been wearing heels, or she would have probably done a lot more damage, maybe even enough to stop him from recapturing her.

He opened the first two letters, which were addressed to him and read them while he drank the second mug of coffee; one a bill and the other from an ex-colleague who wished to know if he fancied a round of golf at some point. However, it was the third letter, addressed to Tai, that drew his undivided attention. A quick look at the return address told him where it had come from. He hesitated. It was exceptionally bad manners to read someone else’s mail, but in this instance, he would make the exception. Ripping it open, he withdrew a single sheet of paper and began scanning the text until he found what he was looking for. Despite the circumstances, a sense of pride filled him and a slight smile formed on his lips. Then he let out a deflated sigh. Today should have been a day on which the family celebrated together. Instead, they found themselves in the midst of the biggest crisis they’d ever faced. He looked at the paper again and thought for a moment. This might just be the solution to their problem.

“How’s Kari?”

Susumu looked up to see the tired figure of his wife pull up her chair and sit down at the table. “Pissed as a hornet,” he replied grimly. He held Tai’s letter out towards her, “however, we may just have found a solution.”

Yuuko took the paper from him and let out a gasp of surprise as she read it. She paused for a moment before saying, “I know what you’re thinking and Tai will never agree to it.”

“I don’t intend to give him a choice in the matter,” Susumu said firmly. “We agreed that the best course of action is to ensure that they are kept apart.”

This morning it was his wife’s turn to play devil’s advocate, “and how do you intend to make sure of that? Even if Tai did agree, what’s to stop him showing up in Odaiba whenever he feels like it and continuing this sordid relationship. We can’t exactly monitor Kari twenty-four seven.”

He scratched his chin. She made a good point. They could send Tai across the globe but would be powerless to stop him coming back if and when he chose to. And keeping Kari under house arrest would not allow her to move on. Not to mention that she would need to go to school. While he already had an idea of something that might deter their son from coming back to Odaiba, it might not be enough. Ultimately, they would need some way of keeping tabs on him… it was at that moment, that an idea popped into his head. It might take a bit of wangling, but there may be an option in that regard, someone who could do the job for them.

“Leave it with me,” he eventually replied, not wanting to divulge the details of something that might not come to fruition. “For now, why don’t you try and figure out some way of calming Kari down. You’ve always been closer to her than I have.”

Yuuko nodded her head in agreement, “ok, but I’ve got a bad feeling that it might be some time before she’s even willing to talk to us.”

Susumu finished the last of his coffee, put the letters back in their envelopes and then rose from his chair. No time like the present, he thought as he went to the coffee table and picked up Tai’s cell phone. His wife had told him which of their children’s friends had told her about their depraved relationship and it just so happened the individual in question was the one who had sprung to mind. He flicked through the list of contacts on his son’s phone until he found the one he was looking for and took note of the number. Crossing over to the other side of the main living area, he picked up the house phone and dialled.

“Hello,” a voice on the other end said after three rings.

“Hello, it’s Mr Kamiya,” Susumu replied, “you recently spoke with my wife about Tai and Kari and the indecent relationship they’ve been having.”

“Ah,” the person on the other end replied, which was followed by an awkward pause.

Only at this point did he realise that the individual might think he intended to yell at them for having spread such vicious gossip. So, he elected to quickly put pay to any such thoughts they might have, “thanks to you, we were able to confront them about it and begin to take steps towards putting an end to it.”

“You don’t need to thank me.”

“If it had not been for you, we may not have found out about it. Tai and Kari covered their tracks very well,” Susumu admitted. “That’s why I have a proposition for you…”


	83. Pt6 10) In my room

**Part Six: Secret No Longer**

**Chapter Ten: In my room**

It was a completely foreign experience for Kari Kamiya to feel this level of anger for this long. Yet here she sat, almost two days on from having been caught having sex with her brother and she was livid. After yesterday’s disastrous attempt to whitewash over things at breakfast, her parents had kept her locked up inside her bedroom. Granted she’d not given them any incentive to let her out. At lunchtime on Saturday, they had brought her something to eat and her mother had tried to talk to her again. Kari had completely blanked her and not even taken her headphones off. It had been the same story at dinnertime. At bedtime, they had let her out to use the bathroom, which had been a good thing as she had started to feel nauseous again not long after eating dinner and hurled her stomach contents down the toilet.

Today had pretty much been a rinse and repeat of yesterday. She’d been allowed out to use the bathroom in the morning, invited to sit at the table for breakfast, which she had refused, then spent the rest of the day locked up in her room with her headphones on. Her anger had not dissipated one iota. She was worried too, of course. Worried about Tai. Having not seen hide nor hair of him since that brief glance the previous day, Kari had no idea if he had recovered from the blow their father had dealt him. But what could she do about it? Her mother had point-blank refused to let her see or answer questions about him.

The Wall Live (she’d played it four times since yesterday) came to a close and Kari opened her eyes. Picking up her music player, which she’d had to plug in to charge, from the nightstand, she flicked through her albums as she tried to decide what to play next. Her eyes lingered over Tubular Bells, the album that had set the course of her musical journey of discovery. It was also the first one she had played for Tai all those months ago. She sighed. Her boyfriend must still be in a lot of pain, she reasoned. Otherwise, he would have broken down his bedroom door, fended off their parents and come to her by now. Yes, Tai would have broken down any barrier in his way to get to her if he had been able to. It made Kari feel pathetic. On one of the rare occasions when her boyfriend needed her, she was powerless to do anything to help him. And after everything he had gone through for her in the past. From risking his life to find her medicine in the Digital World, to when he had jumped onto her balcony after she had accidentally kissed…

Kari’s eyes shot up from her music player to the glass doors that led out onto her balcony. Why had she not thought about it before? Ripping off her headphones, she leapt from her bed and sprinted across the room. Wrenching open the door, she stepped out onto her balcony. She took in a welcome breath of fresh air through her nostrils, her eyes momentarily lingering on the late evening Odaiba skyline. Rain hit her face, but she did not care. She may technically still be within the confines of her bedroom, but this glorious feeling felt like freedom. She let the breath out slowly through her mouth, turned to the right and walked over to the ledge. A gap of only about four, maybe five feet separated her from her parent’s bedroom… and Tai. While her brother was not actually in the room, he might as well have been. Once safely across, she would be able to sneak out into the hallway and across the short distance to her boyfriend’s bedroom. Even if her parents noticed, they would have no time to stop her opening the door, then locking herself inside. What happened then… she would deal with later. For now…

Kari stared out across the divide that separated her balcony from that of her parents. She took a deep breath and felt goose pimples form on her skin. Now that she focused on it, the distance between the two rooms felt like a chasm. Hesitantly, she took a step backwards. She couldn’t jump that… could she? Tai had managed it, but he was miles more athletic. Her knees began to tremble and she felt the urge to turn and head back into her room. Except the love she felt for Tai would not allow her to do so. If able, her boyfriend would have risked everything to come to her aid. So, if there was the slightest chance that she could make the jump, she needed to take it.

Cautiously, Kari stepped back towards the ledge. Placing her hands on its wet surface, she hoisted herself up onto it. A gust of wind blew in her direction, shaking her body and spraying her with icy raindrops. Don’t look down… don’t look down… she told herself, fixing her gaze on the edge of her parent’s balcony. She hesitated. Come on, Kari, you can do this, she told herself, Tai needs you. Heart in her mouth, she took one last deep breath and jumped.

It was one of those moments that feels like an eternity but in reality, lasts only a heartbeat. Kari flew through the air and felt a shockwave shoot up her right leg as it impacted on the wet ledge on the other side. For a brief heartbeat, as her trailing leg still struggled to catch up, she felt a rush at having made the jump. Then her foot slipped. Sliding forward it lost all contact with the ledge and hurtled towards the balcony floor. Her trailing foot caught the outside wall, causing her groin to smash down onto its surface. The pain that shot through Kari’s body was so severe that her eyes glazed over and she had no idea on which side of the ledge her body eventually fell.

##

It was getting late when Yuuko and her husband finally decided it was time for bed. The weekend was rapidly coming to a close, which presented them with a new problem. What to do come tomorrow morning? Susumu was supposed to have work and Kari school. They’d debated this problem all evening and eventually concluded that they had little choice in the matter. Her husband could not take time off from work and without a doctor’s certificate, Kari would need to go to school. That would leave her alone with Tai, who would have to be kept locked inside his bedroom. For if she dared open the door to her son’s room while her husband was out, he would almost certainly overpower her and make a b-line for Odaiba Middle School. It was a blessing that he had finished high school on Friday.

Yuuko let out a sigh as she made her way down the hallway towards her bedroom. Susumu had spent half the day on the telephone, trying to get the ball rolling on his long-term solution to the current problem. However, given that it had been Sunday, he had made little headway. She could only hope that he managed to make the arrangements soon, as keeping Tai locked up in his bedroom would probably become increasingly difficult. How long would it be before he decided to try and break the door down, she wondered? Should they have gone to the hardware store and bought some bolts to reinforce it? And how was she supposed to go out with her son locked inside his bedroom? She shook her head and tried to force the questions from her mind. These problems and any others she encountered were just going to have to be solved as and when they arose. She opened the door to her bedroom.

At first, Yuuko did not realise that anything was wrong. In fact, she had managed to take several steps before she caught sight of something bright orange lying on the ground beyond the balcony doors. What on earth was that she thought as her head tilted to try and get a better look at it through the blinds. It had been windy outside all day. Had one of her neighbours had some laundry hanging out to dry, but lost an orange garment to the wind? She drew closer and her eyes widened when she realised that the clump of orange was not a stray t-shirt or other article of clothing, but hair.

“KARI!” Yuuko screamed at the top of her voice as she sprinted to the balcony doors and frantically struggled to open them. All the colour drained from her face when she saw the pool of blood mixed with rainwater that lay beside her daughter’s motionless head. It did not take a genius to figure out what had happened. Kari had obviously jumped across the balcony but slipped and hit her head. OH GOD! “SUSUMU!” she screamed, as she slid down onto her knees and rolled the girl over. Her daughter’s skin was chalk white and felt ice cold to the touch; her clothing was also soaked. She must have been lying here for at least an hour.

For behind her, she heard the sound of her husband’s feet hammering on the wooden floor. “Yuuko, what’s happened?” he called out to her.

She turned and met his gaze, rainwater dripping from her bangs and tears streaming down her face. “HURRY AND CALL AN AMBULANCE!” she yelled. Cradling her daughters head, the icy grip of fear took over and she lost all ability to even check for a pulse. Instead, her mind was thrown back ten years ago to the sight of her five-year-old daughter’s motionless body lying in a hospital bed. Pale skin amidst white sheets, with brown hair the only hint of colour. All she could do was let out a blood-curdling scream.

##

Locked inside his own bedroom, Tai Lay on his bed with his back propped up against the headboard. Earlier that day, he’d moved the small portable tv to the edge of his desk so that it faced the bed. He’d then plugged in the GameCube and put on Metroid Prime; already anticipating that he could be stuck here for the long haul. His abdomen still hurt, but nowhere near as bad as it had the previous day. After taking the strong painkiller his mom had offered him yesterday morning, he’d slept until late afternoon, waking to find some sandwiches left on his desk. He’d struggled to eat and then spent the remainder of the day lying on his bed, drifting in and out of consciousness under the influence of more painkillers.

Come today, he’d been awoken by both parents, escorted to and from the bathroom, given breakfast back in his room and then left alone; lunch and dinner had been delivered at the appropriate times. However, none of his requests to see Kari or attempts to try and talk some sense into either of them had been met with a shred of positivity. So, he’d spent the day resting and playing Metroid Prime. While the temptation to try and kick the door down had reared its head on numerous occasions, he’d decided against it… for now. The last thing he needed was to attempt it and fail. Only for his parents to do something to reinforce it. No, he’d wait until he was back to full strength before having a crack at it.

Tai was in the process of hunting down a missile expansion in Magmoor Caverns when he heard his mom scream Kari’s name. Dropping the control pad onto the bed, he turned his head to listen. Not quite sure of what he had just heard. However, the second he heard her yell for his father, Tai was on his feet. “Dad, what’s going on?” he yelled on hearing the hurried footsteps of his father in the hallway. He received no reply. “Dad!” he tried again, banging on the door to try and get his father’s attention.

His ear pressed up against the woodwork, he could just make out his father asking his mom what was wrong. It sounded like they were in their bedroom. What on earth had happened? A moment later and the colour drained from his face when his mother yelled at his father to call an ambulance. When his father’s hurried footsteps sounded once more, Tai battered on his door and yelled, “DAD, WHAT’S HAPPENED TO KARI!”

“Everything’s fine, don’t worry,” his dad replied hastily, although even with the muffling effect of the door, Tai could tell that he was lying.

“Why does mom want you to call an ambulance then?” he fired back.

“It’s just a precaution, everything’s going to be fine. Now just you stay put.”

Tai had no intention of doing that. Something serious had happened to Kari and he was not just going to return to his game and pretend that nothing had happened. Taking a step back, he sized up the door. His abdomen twinged in protest, like it knew what he was planning, but he chose to ignore it. Without wasting any more time, he gave the door a kick and quickly regretted it. “Son of a bitch!” he cursed under his breath as pain shot up his foot, which was encased in just a sock. He quickly shook it off and darted to the wardrobe. Almost wrenching the doors of their hinges, he began furiously tearing through the contents of his box of old shoes until he found a sturdy pair of trainers. Shoving his feet into them, he laced the up and returned to the door. Lashing out with his foot, he kicked the thing once, twice… “Come on…” kick, “you…” kick, “BASTARD!” KICK! The door burst open, the strip of wood that covered the lock on the outside having parted company with the wall.

For a split second, Tai sucked in a breath through gritted teeth, then turned to face his parents' room. He darted towards it; ignoring the yell of his father from the main living area. Heart thundering like a freight train, he burst across the threshold to see his mom out on the balcony, cradling a mass of bright orange hair. “KARI!” Tai yelled as he sprinted the short distance between the doors. “Mom, what happened?” he asked as he skidded down onto his knees.

His mother did not respond.

“MOM,” Tai yelled, forcing her to look at him. Her eyes were glazed over and he could not tell if it was rain or tears that ran down her cheeks. She’d gone completely catatonic. “Shit,” he cursed as he pulled Kari’s limp body out of the woman’s grasp; he could see the red streaks of blood in her soaking, matted hair. In one deft movement, he scoped his girlfriend up off the ground and stood up. Turning, he quickly took her inside and placed her down on the bed. “Kari, can you hear me?” he asked, his fingers moving to her neck to check for a pulse, “Kari?”

His girlfriend gave no indication that she could hear him, however, Tai let out a brief sigh of relief when he felt her faint heartbeat beneath his fingers; she was still alive. Putting his head near her mouth and nose confirmed that she was breathing. “It’s going to be ok, Kari,” he said in, his voice laced with mild notes of panic.

“Tai,” he then heard his father say firmly from the doorway.

He turned to look at the man. “How long will the ambulance be?” he demanded, a harshness in his voice due to the events of the past few days.

“It’s on its way,” his father replied, “should be here in fifteen. How is she?”

“She’s got a pulse and breathing, but I think she’s unconscious. What happened?” The moment the question left Tai’s lips, the answer had already started to form inside his head. Kari had been out on his parent’s balcony, meaning she had made the jump from her own, probably to try and get to him, but somehow slipped and hit her head.

“Your mother found her on the balcony. She must have jumped across from her room to ours,” his father said, reiterating the thought Tai had just had. “I don’t know where she would have got an idea to try something as stupid as that.”

A cold shiver ran down Tai’s spine. He knew exactly where Kari had picked up an idea like that. He’d done the exact same thing in order to get to her on that fateful night when she had accidentally kissed him. A voice in the back of his head hissed at him that this was all his fault, but he managed to quash it for now. However, he knew that once the dust had settled, he would have to deal with it. “Kari,” he said again, giving his girlfriend a small shake, “Kari…”

For the briefest of moments, her eyelids flickered open a crack. “Tai,” she said in a voice that sounded like the ghost of a whispers echo.

Instinctively, he took hold of her ice-cold slender hands in his own. “Kari, you’re going to be ok… I’m here for you.”

“Are… you… ok?” she asked, just before her head slumped.

“Yes…” Tai whispered in response, tears welling up in his eyes. Even now, when in such a terrible state, Kari was more concerned for his wellbeing than her own. “I’m fine and you’re going to be ok too, just stay with me.”

Out of the corner of his eye, Tai could see that his father had brought his mother back in from the balcony and sat her down at the dressing table. It was not long afterwards that he heard a sharp knock at the apartment door. His father immediately sprang to his feet and rushed to let the paramedics in. Only when prompted by a kind woman, did he let go of Kari’s hand and step away from her. There was nothing he could do but watch as his girlfriend was checked over, then put onto a stretcher and wheeled out of the room.

“I’m going with her,” Tai then said firmly to his father.

To his surprise, he received no argument. However, he soon saw why. One of the paramedics had gone over to check on his mother, who had clearly gone into shock. He ignored them and followed the stretcher out of the apartment and down to the waiting ambulance. Kari was going to be ok, he kept telling himself… she just had to be...


	84. Pt6 11) Broken bones

**Part Six: Secret No Longer**

**Chapter Eleven: Broken bones**

It was eerily quiet in the small waiting area outside the hospital room that had been found for Kari. One after another the three Kamiya’s, brother, mother and father had gathered. Tai had been the first to arrive, shepherded there by a nurse after they had taken his sister away. His mother had been next. She’d been in the ambulance with him, taken away to be treated for shock once they had arrived, then escorted to a seat beside him. Lastly, his father had made it there after having been caught in traffic while following the ambulance. So far, he had been the only one to say anything, having asked if there was any news, only to be told no.

Tai sat with a stoic expression on his face, which hid the fact that internally he was in turmoil. Kari meant everything to him, but there was not a thing he could do to help her. Not only that, but he was the one responsible for putting the idea of jumping the balcony into her head. Fate could be a cruel mistress. Had he not done so all those months ago, he might never have found out about the feelings Kari had for him, thus discovered those he had for her in return. And none of this might ever have happened. Yet by the same virtue, having done so might lead to… No, he could not think like that. Kari was strong. She was going to be alright.

“Mr and Mrs Kamiya,”

Tai’s head snapped around when he heard the voice of the female doctor who had just appeared in the corridor. As one, he and his parents rose from their chairs and swarmed the woman. “How’s Kari?” they all asked in unison.

“She suffered a small fracture to her skull, which we’ve repaired and I don’t think there will be any lasting damage. However, we’ve sent her for a head MRI, just to be on the safe side. My bigger concern is the length of time she was lying out in the cold and the rain. Given her history, it is likely that her immune system will have been compromised and I am worried that might lead to her picking up some sort of infection. In that respect, I would like to keep her here for a few days, just to be on the safe side.”

They all let out a collective sigh of relief upon hearing that Kari’s condition was not life-threatening. Unfortunately, the doctor was about to add a horrible twist to the tale.

“There is one other thing that I think you should know,” the woman said in a grim tone that caused all three Kamiya’s to focus their attention on her once more.

“What’s wrong?” Yuuko said before anyone else managed to utter a word. She could feel the fear from earlier slowly starting to build again and she struggled to contain it.

“When we examined Kari, we found that she had bled extensively in her groin. However, while she might have a minor fracture in her pelvis, we could find no source for the blood… to cut a long story short, we believe that she was pregnant and has miscarried.”

Tai’s jaw hit the floor upon hearing the doctor’s words. Kari had been pregnant… and miscarried… Staggering backwards, he somehow found his way back to his chair and sat down. He couldn’t believe it… didn’t want to believe it… they had been careful and used protection… yet he knew it to be true. The nausea and vomiting she’d had last week had not been the result of a stomach bug, it had been morning sickness. Kari had been pregnant with his child… and now she had miscarried.

Yuuko did not see her son back away, she had eyes only for the doctor. “What?” she asked in disbelief. While she had heard the woman’s words, her brain refused to process them. Kari could not have been…

“We believe that Kari was pregnant and has miscarried,” the doctor reiterated. “I’m so sorry,” she then added.

Susumu instinctively put an arm around his wife’s shoulders as she clapped her hands over her mouth and burst into tears. It was a horrible thing to have happened to Kari… and he might be equally as horrible for thinking that it may have been for the best. Only the thought lingered in his brain nonetheless. Not only was his daughter only sixteen, but the child had been conceived of incest. Nothing good could have come from her carrying it to term. And it only further highlighted the reasons why his children needed to be separated. He looked at the doctor and said firmly, “under no circumstances are you to tell Kari that she was pregnant and miscarried.”

“…As she is a minor, the decision of what medical information is shared with her resides with you. However, are you sure that is for the best?”

“Very,” Susumu replied. “Kari is not to find out.”

The doctor nodded her head, “very well. I’ll make sure your wishes are conveyed to the staff that know about it. I’ll notify you when Kari is back from her MRI, then you can go and see her.”

With that, the doctor left.

As her husband guided Yuuko back to the chairs, her eyes fell upon her son. And the parallels between now and ten years ago proved to be too much for her to cope with. Only this time, while Kari may have been in less danger, the situation was a whole lot worse. “THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!” she screamed at him, shaking her way out of Susumu’s grip.

Robotically, Tai turned his head and looked up at his mother. Through the contortions of anger and rage, the pain and anguish could be seen upon her tear-stained face; just like when he had been eight. And like back then, her harsh words were spot on. It was all his fault. Kari had fallen pregnant because of him… jumped the balcony in an attempt to get to him… and all because he’d given her the idea all those months ago. Lips trembling and eyes stinging with the threat of tears, Tai opened his mouth and mumbled, “I’m sorry…”

No matter what her son said, it would have been wrong. But to hear him utter an apology like that, sent Yuuko over the edge. In a flash, her hand shot out and slapped Tai across his right cheek; the same spot she’d hit ten years ago and on three occasions since, all because of events involving Kari. “YOU’RE SORRY!” she yelled, her features almost manic now. “BECAUSE OF YOU, YOUR SISTER IS LYING IN A HOSPITAL BED WITH A FRACTURED SKULL AND PELVIS AFTER HAVING MISCARRIED!”

Tai had seen the blow coming, expected it almost, but done nothing to try and stop it. He deserved it. As his cheek began to burn, he listened to his mother’s words of damnation and his eyes found his battered old trainers. Kari had been hurt because of him…

Yuuko felt her husband wrap his arms around her and try to pull her away. She struggled against him but knew he would have his way sooner or later. However, she had one last thing to yell at her son. One final truth she needed to hammer home. “KARI WOULD HAVE BEEN BETTER OFF WITHOUT YOU IN HER LIFE! I SHOULD HAVE PACKED YOU OFF TO A BOARDING SCHOOL TEN YEARS AGO!”

With great difficulty, Susumu finally managed to drag his wife away from their son. He hated seeing her like this and knew he would have his work cut out for him with both mother and daughter after the dust finally settled over this whole affair. Clutching Yuuko close to his chest, he felt her dissolve into tears. At that moment, he made up his mind. He would leave his wife at the hospital with Kari, take Tai home himself and tell him what was going to happen. As cold and heartless as it might be, the sooner he dealt with Tai, the better it would be for everyone and the sooner they could all start to move on. It was that simple.

##

Tai could not really recall what had happened at the hospital after his mother had slapped him. At some point, the female doctor had returned, said something to his parents, who’d gotten up to follow her. He’d stayed put. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he knew that Kari had returned from her MRI, but he could not bring himself to face her. His mom had been right, his sister would have been better off without him in her life. Some time after this, his father had returned and escorted him through the hospital and to the car. He’d offered no resistance.

As they made their way through the semi-quiet Odaiba streets, Tai sat in the passenger seat and stared out of the window at the passing streetlamps. Light… just like Kari… except even if you added them all together, it would still not be enough to match her brightness. A brightness that had almost been snuffed out twice because of him. He was bad for her…

“We’re home,” his father then said stiffly, before climbing out of the car.

Like he was a puppet on strings, Tai followed his father out of the car, through the undercroft to the stairs and up to the apartment. Inside his father turned on the lights to illuminate the quiet main living area; the place felt sterile, devoid of life. Without any thought, he changed his shoes and trudged off towards the hallway.

“Sit,” his father commanded as Tai passed the dining table.

He turned to see the firm expression on the man’s face and knew it was not an invitation. Pulling out the nearest chair, he sat and watched his father go into the kitchen and make a pot of coffee. What was he about to get dictated to him now, Tai wondered? He’d already been barred from seeing Kari, was he about to be confined to his bedroom or worse?

His father placed two mugs of coffee on the table but did not immediately sit down. However, Tai’s gaze did not bother to follow him. Instead, he simply stared at the steam that rose from the mug in front of him.

His father then sat down. “Tai, first and foremost, I need you to know that the decision I have made in regards to the current situation, has not been influenced by tonight’s events. However, they serve to illustrate perfectly why I’ve had to make this difficult choice.”

Tai raised his eyes to look at his father, a slightly stunned expression on his face. Whatever the man was about to say, he knew he would not like it; that was a given. However, the fact that in only forty-eight hours, his dad had made what sounded like a serious decision on the matter, caught him off guard and shocked him slightly. Only this paled in comparison to what happened next.

His father handed him an envelope that had already been opened. “Read it,” he said firmly.

Tai slid the single sheet of paper out of the envelope, unfolded it and read, _“Dear Mr Kamiya, we are writing to inform you of the result of your __National Center Test for University Admission. Your result is as follows…” _The paper fell from his hands when he read the figure. “…seventy-eight percent…” he breathed, unable to comprehend the fact that he’d scored that high. “I scored seventy-eight percent…”

“Congratulations,” his father said in a bittersweet tone.

It should have been one of the most joyous moments of his life, yet Tai felt absolutely nothing at having found out his test result. The events of the past forty-eight hours had left him feeling completely numb. He looked up at his dad. “You already knew,” he said flatly.

“It arrived yesterday,” his father replied. “Tai, you have such a promising future ahead of you. You’ll be able to play soccer and study at the best university in the country. In fact, if you put in the effort, there may even be a chance of you getting signed by a professional team. That’s why you need to go to Kyoto.”

Tai’s eyes narrowed. Back in the car, he had been prepared to keep himself away from his sister, on account of what his mother had said. However, now, faced the prospect of being nearly five-hundred-kilometres away from her, he could not bear the idea of separating himself from her. Whatever his flaws were, whatever he did that was bad for her, he would strive to rid himself of them. He locked gazes with his father. “I can do all that here in Tokyo,” he stated defiantly.

His father’s gaze did not waver. “But you won’t,” the man replied. “You are going to go to Kyoto, start a new life and not return to Odaiba, is that understood?”

“No,” Tai said firmly. “I’m going to stay here in Tokyo and get a place of my own. If needs be, Kari can move in with me.”

“That’s not going to happen, Tai. You’re not going to see your sister again.”

“Who’s going to stop me?”

“The law,” his father said, completely unphased.

“What?” Tai asked in confusion, slightly surprised by what his father had just said.

“Kari’s a minor, Tai, bellow the age of consent and you slept with her. Your mother and I both bore witness to that.”

“No she’s not,” he said with a shake of his head. Although the certainty with which his father spoke had given him cause for concern. “The legal age of consent is only thirteen.”

“You’re right, the national age of consent in this country is thirteen.” A dark smile formed on his father’s lips. “But virtually every province has its own local law regarding the age of consent. And in Tokyo, it's eighteen, which Kari is not.”

A lump formed in Tai’s throat on hearing this. Even if he had known this, it probably would not have stopped him sleeping with his sister, however, a feeling of dread now washed over him. Surely his father wouldn’t…

“Incest might not be illegal in this country, but sleeping with a minor is.” A cold, hard look formed on his father’s face, like nothing he had never seen before. “I didn’t want to go down this route, Tai, but you seem to be leaving me no choice. Now, either you take this opportunity of a fantastic life and career in Kyoto and swear that you will never come back to Odaiba or I call the police and have you charged with corruption of a minor.”

There was a moment of silence as Tai absorbed what his father had just said. He couldn’t quite believe that his own dad would actually report him to the police. Only the man was not finished hammering home his point. “You’ll be remanded in police custody, as neither your mother nor I will pay your bail, until such time as your trial comes around. Even if you plead guilty, you’ll probably still go to jail for a short term. You’ll lose your scholarships and any chance of playing professional football. Not to mention that you will have a criminal record that will hamper you for the rest of your life.”

“You bastard!” Tai yelled as he slammed his fists on the table, his entire body shaking with rage. He could not believe that his father would stoop to this level to ensure that his relationship with Kari ended. He took in a ragged breath through gritted teeth as his brain frantically weighed up these two nuclear options. On the one hand, he could have a fantastic life at the expense of his relationship with Kari, or on the other, he could ruin his career before it had even begun in an attempt to stay in Tokyo to be with his sister. It was almost an impossible choice. But in the end, only one of them had the thing he wanted most. 

Unfortunately, as if he had been reading Tai’s mind, his father then played his final card face-up on the table. “In case you’re mulling over whether or not all that is worth it so you can try and continue this depraved relationship with your sister, if you choose that course of action, Kari goes to a secure boarding school for the next three years. In short, you both lose… are you willing to ruin her life as well as your own?”

Tai met the stone-cold eyes of his father and found absolutely no pity or remorse. He had to hand it to the man, he’d mapped out the situation perfectly and known exactly what his son’s priorities would be. After everything that had happened tonight, there was only one choice he could make. While he had no issues with sacrificing his own life for the sake of his sister, he could not ruin hers in the process. “Fine,” he whispered in the most downbeat manner he had ever used, “you win. I’ll go to Kyoto.”

“I’m glad to hear it,” his father replied, his voice noticeably softening. “However, there are a few other conditions.”

Tai simply stared at the man. What now?

“You’ll be getting a new cell phone and sim card, along with a new laptop. Your old email account along with any you use for instant messaging will also be deleted. The same will also apply to your sister. If I suspect that you are in any way communicating with Kari, I’ll contact the police. Do you understand?”

He nodded glumly. It seemed his father had thought of everything.

“I’ve already started making preparations for you to move to Kyoto as soon as possible. I hope to have everything in place by the start of next week. Until then, you are to stay at home and if your sister is discharged from hospital before you leave, you will stay in your bedroom. Understood?”

Tai nodded again. This was all happening so fast that his brain did not have the capacity to form words. In just over a week, he would be leaving Odaiba, the only home he had ever known… for good. And, if his father had his way, he would not see Kari for a very long time, if ever. Maybe it had been a foolish notion to even dream that he could sustain a long-term relationship with his sister, let alone think they could actually do it. Eventually, after a period of silence of unknown length, he finally said, “can I go to bed?”

“I think that might be a good idea,” his father replied, “it’s been a long night for everyone.”

Without saying another word, Tai headed towards the hallway. He was just about to pass the door to Kari’s room, when his father called out, “I’m sorry things have to be this way, but it is for the best. You’ll have a good life in Kyoto and if you keep working hard, have a successful career in whatever field you choose.” His father paused for a moment before adding, “and despite what’s happened, I’m still proud of you.”

Tai said nothing as he turned his head and walked the rest of the way down the hallway. Entering his bedroom, he closed the door behind him and felt infuriated when it did not click shut; the wood panel he had broken earlier that evening no longer there to allow it to do so. Throwing himself down on his bed his eyes met with the TV screen and the game over screen that it displayed. He could not have seen anything more apt if he had channel surfed all night. Despite what he or his sister wished, it seemed that the love they shared had come to a permanent end this time.


	85. Pt6 12) Home

**Part Six: Secret No Longer**

**Chapter Eleven: Broken bones**

It was eerily quiet in the small waiting area outside the hospital room that had been found for Kari. One after another the three Kamiya’s, brother, mother and father had gathered. Tai had been the first to arrive, shepherded there by a nurse after they had taken his sister away. His mother had been next. She’d been in the ambulance with him, taken away to be treated for shock once they had arrived, then escorted to a seat beside him. Lastly, his father had made it there after having been caught in traffic while following the ambulance. So far, he had been the only one to say anything, having asked if there was any news, only to be told no.

Tai sat with a stoic expression on his face, which hid the fact that internally he was in turmoil. Kari meant everything to him, but there was not a thing he could do to help her. Not only that, but he was the one responsible for putting the idea of jumping the balcony into her head. Fate could be a cruel mistress. Had he not done so all those months ago, he might never have found out about the feelings Kari had for him, thus discovered those he had for her in return. And none of this might ever have happened. Yet by the same virtue, having done so might lead to… No, he could not think like that. Kari was strong. She was going to be alright.

“Mr and Mrs Kamiya,”

Tai’s head snapped around when he heard the voice of the female doctor who had just appeared in the corridor. As one, he and his parents rose from their chairs and swarmed the woman. “How’s Kari?” they all asked in unison.

“She suffered a small fracture to her skull, which we’ve repaired and I don’t think there will be any lasting damage. However, we’ve sent her for a head MRI, just to be on the safe side. My bigger concern is the length of time she was lying out in the cold and the rain. Given her history, it is likely that her immune system will have been compromised and I am worried that might lead to her picking up some sort of infection. In that respect, I would like to keep her here for a few days, just to be on the safe side.”

They all let out a collective sigh of relief upon hearing that Kari’s condition was not life-threatening. Unfortunately, the doctor was about to add a horrible twist to the tale.

“There is one other thing that I think you should know,” the woman said in a grim tone that caused all three Kamiya’s to focus their attention on her once more.

“What’s wrong?” Yuuko said before anyone else managed to utter a word. She could feel the fear from earlier slowly starting to build again and she struggled to contain it.

“When we examined Kari, we found that she had bled extensively in her groin. However, while she might have a minor fracture in her pelvis, we could find no source for the blood… to cut a long story short, we believe that she was pregnant and has miscarried.”

Tai’s jaw hit the floor upon hearing the doctor’s words. Kari had been pregnant… and miscarried… Staggering backwards, he somehow found his way back to his chair and sat down. He couldn’t believe it… didn’t want to believe it… they had been careful and used protection… yet he knew it to be true. The nausea and vomiting she’d had last week had not been the result of a stomach bug, it had been morning sickness. Kari had been pregnant with his child… and now she had miscarried.

Yuuko did not see her son back away, she had eyes only for the doctor. “What?” she asked in disbelief. While she had heard the woman’s words, her brain refused to process them. Kari could not have been…

“We believe that Kari was pregnant and has miscarried,” the doctor reiterated. “I’m so sorry,” she then added.

Susumu instinctively put an arm around his wife’s shoulders as she clapped her hands over her mouth and burst into tears. It was a horrible thing to have happened to Kari… and he might be equally as horrible for thinking that it may have been for the best. Only the thought lingered in his brain nonetheless. Not only was his daughter only sixteen, but the child had been conceived of incest. Nothing good could have come from her carrying it to term. And it only further highlighted the reasons why his children needed to be separated. He looked at the doctor and said firmly, “under no circumstances are you to tell Kari that she was pregnant and miscarried.”

“…As she is a minor, the decision of what medical information is shared with her resides with you. However, are you sure that is for the best?”

“Very,” Susumu replied. “Kari is not to find out.”

The doctor nodded her head, “very well. I’ll make sure your wishes are conveyed to the staff that know about it. I’ll notify you when Kari is back from her MRI, then you can go and see her.”

With that, the doctor left.

As her husband guided Yuuko back to the chairs, her eyes fell upon her son. And the parallels between now and ten years ago proved to be too much for her to cope with. Only this time, while Kari may have been in less danger, the situation was a whole lot worse. “THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!” she screamed at him, shaking her way out of Susumu’s grip.

Robotically, Tai turned his head and looked up at his mother. Through the contortions of anger and rage, the pain and anguish could be seen upon her tear-stained face; just like when he had been eight. And like back then, her harsh words were spot on. It was all his fault. Kari had fallen pregnant because of him… jumped the balcony in an attempt to get to him… and all because he’d given her the idea all those months ago. Lips trembling and eyes stinging with the threat of tears, Tai opened his mouth and mumbled, “I’m sorry…”

No matter what her son said, it would have been wrong. But to hear him utter an apology like that, sent Yuuko over the edge. In a flash, her hand shot out and slapped Tai across his right cheek; the same spot she’d hit ten years ago and on three occasions since, all because of events involving Kari. “YOU’RE SORRY!” she yelled, her features almost manic now. “BECAUSE OF YOU, YOUR SISTER IS LYING IN A HOSPITAL BED WITH A FRACTURED SKULL AND PELVIS AFTER HAVING MISCARRIED!”

Tai had seen the blow coming, expected it almost, but done nothing to try and stop it. He deserved it. As his cheek began to burn, he listened to his mother’s words of damnation and his eyes found his battered old trainers. Kari had been hurt because of him…

Yuuko felt her husband wrap his arms around her and try to pull her away. She struggled against him but knew he would have his way sooner or later. However, she had one last thing to yell at her son. One final truth she needed to hammer home. “KARI WOULD HAVE BEEN BETTER OFF WITHOUT YOU IN HER LIFE! I SHOULD HAVE PACKED YOU OFF TO A BOARDING SCHOOL TEN YEARS AGO!”

With great difficulty, Susumu finally managed to drag his wife away from their son. He hated seeing her like this and knew he would have his work cut out for him with both mother and daughter after the dust finally settled over this whole affair. Clutching Yuuko close to his chest, he felt her dissolve into tears. At that moment, he made up his mind. He would leave his wife at the hospital with Kari, take Tai home himself and tell him what was going to happen. As cold and heartless as it might be, the sooner he dealt with Tai, the better it would be for everyone and the sooner they could all start to move on. It was that simple.

##

Tai could not really recall what had happened at the hospital after his mother had slapped him. At some point, the female doctor had returned, said something to his parents, who’d gotten up to follow her. He’d stayed put. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he knew that Kari had returned from her MRI, but he could not bring himself to face her. His mom had been right, his sister would have been better off without him in her life. Some time after this, his father had returned and escorted him through the hospital and to the car. He’d offered no resistance.

As they made their way through the semi-quiet Odaiba streets, Tai sat in the passenger seat and stared out of the window at the passing streetlamps. Light… just like Kari… except even if you added them all together, it would still not be enough to match her brightness. A brightness that had almost been snuffed out twice because of him. He was bad for her…

“We’re home,” his father then said stiffly, before climbing out of the car.

Like he was a puppet on strings, Tai followed his father out of the car, through the undercroft to the stairs and up to the apartment. Inside his father turned on the lights to illuminate the quiet main living area; the place felt sterile, devoid of life. Without any thought, he changed his shoes and trudged off towards the hallway.

“Sit,” his father commanded as Tai passed the dining table.

He turned to see the firm expression on the man’s face and knew it was not an invitation. Pulling out the nearest chair, he sat and watched his father go into the kitchen and make a pot of coffee. What was he about to get dictated to him now, Tai wondered? He’d already been barred from seeing Kari, was he about to be confined to his bedroom or worse?

His father placed two mugs of coffee on the table but did not immediately sit down. However, Tai’s gaze did not bother to follow him. Instead, he simply stared at the steam that rose from the mug in front of him.

His father then sat down. “Tai, first and foremost, I need you to know that the decision I have made in regards to the current situation, has not been influenced by tonight’s events. However, they serve to illustrate perfectly why I’ve had to make this difficult choice.”

Tai raised his eyes to look at his father, a slightly stunned expression on his face. Whatever the man was about to say, he knew he would not like it; that was a given. However, the fact that in only forty-eight hours, his dad had made what sounded like a serious decision on the matter, caught him off guard and shocked him slightly. Only this paled in comparison to what happened next.

His father handed him an envelope that had already been opened. “Read it,” he said firmly.

Tai slid the single sheet of paper out of the envelope, unfolded it and read, _“Dear Mr Kamiya, we are writing to inform you of the result of your __National Center Test for University Admission. Your result is as follows…” _The paper fell from his hands when he read the figure. “…seventy-eight percent…” he breathed, unable to comprehend the fact that he’d scored that high. “I scored seventy-eight percent…”

“Congratulations,” his father said in a bittersweet tone.

It should have been one of the most joyous moments of his life, yet Tai felt absolutely nothing at having found out his test result. The events of the past forty-eight hours had left him feeling completely numb. He looked up at his dad. “You already knew,” he said flatly.

“It arrived yesterday,” his father replied. “Tai, you have such a promising future ahead of you. You’ll be able to play soccer and study at the best university in the country. In fact, if you put in the effort, there may even be a chance of you getting signed by a professional team. That’s why you need to go to Kyoto.”

Tai’s eyes narrowed. Back in the car, he had been prepared to keep himself away from his sister, on account of what his mother had said. However, now, faced the prospect of being nearly five-hundred-kilometres away from her, he could not bear the idea of separating himself from her. Whatever his flaws were, whatever he did that was bad for her, he would strive to rid himself of them. He locked gazes with his father. “I can do all that here in Tokyo,” he stated defiantly.

His father’s gaze did not waver. “But you won’t,” the man replied. “You are going to go to Kyoto, start a new life and not return to Odaiba, is that understood?”

“No,” Tai said firmly. “I’m going to stay here in Tokyo and get a place of my own. If needs be, Kari can move in with me.”

“That’s not going to happen, Tai. You’re not going to see your sister again.”

“Who’s going to stop me?”

“The law,” his father said, completely unphased.

“What?” Tai asked in confusion, slightly surprised by what his father had just said.

“Kari’s a minor, Tai, bellow the age of consent and you slept with her. Your mother and I both bore witness to that.”

“No she’s not,” he said with a shake of his head. Although the certainty with which his father spoke had given him cause for concern. “The legal age of consent is only thirteen.”

“You’re right, the national age of consent in this country is thirteen.” A dark smile formed on his father’s lips. “But virtually every province has its own local law regarding the age of consent. And in Tokyo, it's eighteen, which Kari is not.”

A lump formed in Tai’s throat on hearing this. Even if he had known this, it probably would not have stopped him sleeping with his sister, however, a feeling of dread now washed over him. Surely his father wouldn’t…

“Incest might not be illegal in this country, but sleeping with a minor is.” A cold, hard look formed on his father’s face, like nothing he had never seen before. “I didn’t want to go down this route, Tai, but you seem to be leaving me no choice. Now, either you take this opportunity of a fantastic life and career in Kyoto and swear that you will never come back to Odaiba or I call the police and have you charged with corruption of a minor.”

There was a moment of silence as Tai absorbed what his father had just said. He couldn’t quite believe that his own dad would actually report him to the police. Only the man was not finished hammering home his point. “You’ll be remanded in police custody, as neither your mother nor I will pay your bail, until such time as your trial comes around. Even if you plead guilty, you’ll probably still go to jail for a short term. You’ll lose your scholarships and any chance of playing professional football. Not to mention that you will have a criminal record that will hamper you for the rest of your life.”

“You bastard!” Tai yelled as he slammed his fists on the table, his entire body shaking with rage. He could not believe that his father would stoop to this level to ensure that his relationship with Kari ended. He took in a ragged breath through gritted teeth as his brain frantically weighed up these two nuclear options. On the one hand, he could have a fantastic life at the expense of his relationship with Kari, or on the other, he could ruin his career before it had even begun in an attempt to stay in Tokyo to be with his sister. It was almost an impossible choice. But in the end, only one of them had the thing he wanted most. 

Unfortunately, as if he had been reading Tai’s mind, his father then played his final card face-up on the table. “In case you’re mulling over whether or not all that is worth it so you can try and continue this depraved relationship with your sister, if you choose that course of action, Kari goes to a secure boarding school for the next three years. In short, you both lose… are you willing to ruin her life as well as your own?”

Tai met the stone-cold eyes of his father and found absolutely no pity or remorse. He had to hand it to the man, he’d mapped out the situation perfectly and known exactly what his son’s priorities would be. After everything that had happened tonight, there was only one choice he could make. While he had no issues with sacrificing his own life for the sake of his sister, he could not ruin hers in the process. “Fine,” he whispered in the most downbeat manner he had ever used, “you win. I’ll go to Kyoto.”

“I’m glad to hear it,” his father replied, his voice noticeably softening. “However, there are a few other conditions.”

Tai simply stared at the man. What now?

“You’ll be getting a new cell phone and sim card, along with a new laptop. Your old email account along with any you use for instant messaging will also be deleted. The same will also apply to your sister. If I suspect that you are in any way communicating with Kari, I’ll contact the police. Do you understand?”

He nodded glumly. It seemed his father had thought of everything.

“I’ve already started making preparations for you to move to Kyoto as soon as possible. I hope to have everything in place by the start of next week. Until then, you are to stay at home and if your sister is discharged from hospital before you leave, you will stay in your bedroom. Understood?”

Tai nodded again. This was all happening so fast that his brain did not have the capacity to form words. In just over a week, he would be leaving Odaiba, the only home he had ever known… for good. And, if his father had his way, he would not see Kari for a very long time, if ever. Maybe it had been a foolish notion to even dream that he could sustain a long-term relationship with his sister, let alone think they could actually do it. Eventually, after a period of silence of unknown length, he finally said, “can I go to bed?”

“I think that might be a good idea,” his father replied, “it’s been a long night for everyone.”

Without saying another word, Tai headed towards the hallway. He was just about to pass the door to Kari’s room, when his father called out, “I’m sorry things have to be this way, but it is for the best. You’ll have a good life in Kyoto and if you keep working hard, have a successful career in whatever field you choose.” His father paused for a moment before adding, “and despite what’s happened, I’m still proud of you.”

Tai said nothing as he turned his head and walked the rest of the way down the hallway. Entering his bedroom, he closed the door behind him and felt infuriated when it did not click shut; the wood panel he had broken earlier that evening no longer there to allow it to do so. Throwing himself down on his bed his eyes met with the TV screen and the game over screen that it displayed. He could not have seen anything more apt if he had channel surfed all night. Despite what he or his sister wished, it seemed that the love they shared had come to a permanent end this time.


	86. Pt6 Epilogue: To be over

**Part Six: Secret No Longer**

**Epilogue: To be over**

Tai sat in the back seat of his father’s car and watched as the last buildings in the outskirts of Tokyo passed him by. This was so long and farewell… for good. With the exception of when he might have to play a soccer game or for other university-related matters, he had agreed not to return to the capital. And Odaiba was completely off-limits. He sighed, it really was goodbye to virtually everything and everyone he had known for eighteen years. While he would probably adjust to Kyoto and make new friends, hell he might even learn to like it, he knew it would never truly feel like home. Home would always be wherever he could find Kari and that would not be in Kyoto.

From the seat next to him, he felt a slender hand reach out and rest atop his own. He turned his head from the window to look at the ginger-haired girl.

“It’s going to be ok, Tai,” Sora said in a soft but reassuring voice. “I know it’s going to be difficult for you, but I’ll be here to help and support you every step of the way.”

Tai gave her a faint smile. It had come as a surprise, albeit a welcome one, when his father had pulled up outside Sora’s home and told him that he had made arrangements for her to move through with him. Not only that, but they were going to be sharing an apartment, which his father would be paying the rent on until such time as they matriculated and got their various bursary/loan payments; he would also be covering it during the holidays. Although he did not know the details yet, it seemed that his new roommate had also managed to speed up her work transfer. However, to Tai, while he welcomed this small slice of home going with him, it still felt like the thinnest of silver linings to a think bank of dark clouds.

“You didn’t have to uproot yourself like this,” he said apologetically.

“I would have been doing so in a few weeks anyway,” she replied and gave his hand a light squeeze. “Besides, when your dad told me what was happening, how could I not? You’re my best friend, Tai. After what you’ve just gone through, I wasn’t going to let you do this alone.”

It was nice to know that, even after everything that had happened with her mom and Matt, Sora still had the capacity to think about other people. Like Kari, it was something that made her one of those rare, special people that you felt fortunate enough to know. He gazed into those beautiful red eyes. “I’m glad you’re with me,” he said softly, before turning his head once more to look out the window.

As he watched the farewell from Tokyo sign pass him by, Tai settled down in his seat and shut his eyes. What the future held for him, he did not know. Only that it was not the one he had envisioned over the past few months. That avenue had been closed off and sealed shut by his father. Would he be able to move on… who knew, he certainly didn’t? But one thing he knew for certain, he would never forget the love he had shared with Kari.

##

Kari stood out on her balcony, eyes staring out a the Odaiba sunset. Being out in the cooling air went against the treatment plan her doctor had set out, but she didn’t care. At this moment in time, she did not feel like obeying anyone’s orders or instructions. The better part of the afternoon had been spent crying her eyes out. Sobbing over the shock loss of Tai and a child she had not even been aware of carrying. Yet she still did not know how she felt about having miscarried beyond the sheer tragedy of it. For now, she at least felt like she had some semblance of mental stability. How long it would last, she did not know. But it at least gave her the clarity to think straight.

Kari’s eyes roved over the city at sunset, as streetlights began to flicker into life. At present, she had no idea where Tai was, but somehow, someway she was going to find out. Despite what her parents had done, this was not the end of the love she felt for her brother. No, nothing they or anyone else did could change how she felt. Even if it took her the rest of her life, she was going to find her way back to the warmth of his loving arms; her home base.

“I’m going to find you, Tai,” Kari said out loud as she took one last glance at the city, “and then we can be together. You can count on it.”

Turning on her heel, she walked back into her bedroom and closed the balcony door behind her. Passing her desk, she slipped her headphones on and picked up her music player. Flicking through she found Pink Floyd’s aptly titled Wish You Were Here and hit play. Lying back on her bed, she closed her eyes and listened to the haunting opening organ notes. She would see Tai again, she just knew it. As for Kari Kamiya, the love they shared was not over.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, now we know how it all ends. At this point in time, I suspect some of you might be either yelling at your screens or cursing me for ending the story in this manner. And that you probably want to know what happens after the final epilogue. I know the TaiKari fanboy in me does. However, at this point in time, I feel that this story has reached its conclusion and that any continuation would need to involve a time jump of some description. Hence, I think that would require a story in its own right.
> 
> In regards to a potential sequel, I am afraid that this is the point where I am going to have to disappoint us all for the time being. Writing this story was a labour of love and the realisation of a mad idea I had of wanting to write a love story between Tai and Kari many moons ago. However, I will not deny that I felt some fatigue during the writing of part four, which resurfaced come the start of part six and it was genuinely difficult to finish. Hence, I know in myself that I need to take a significant amount of time away from the characters before I can even think about writing them again. Although that being said, it does not take anything away from how much I enjoyed writing this story and the emotional wringer that it put me through.
> 
> From an objective standpoint, now that it's been a few months since I finished this story, I feel that in an attempt to increase the drama, that I may have overcooked the ending in regards to Kari becoming pregnant. There were also several chapters that got cut due to time constraints and my growing fatigue (some form the other DigiDestineds POV's), which I would like to have included. However, at the moment I do not feel like I have had nearly enough time away from this story or these characters to come back to it and perhaps add some of these chapters back in or rework the ending a little. In fact, if I were to try, I would probably just make a complete mess of it. Hence why I have simply posted it in its original form; without alteration. What I will say is that if, and it is a big if atm, I decide to write a sequel, I will probably revisit this story first and make any alterations before I start. So, while I am not ruling out the possibility of a sequel, it almost certainly won't happen any time soon.
> 
> Finally, I would like to pass the torch on in a fashion. As I said to someone during a PM conversation over at Fanfiction, the first time I ever felt inspired to write was after reading an old TaiKari story; My Brother, some 14ish years ago. It made me want to write one of my own, which after a very long delay, has actually come to fruition. Regardless, my point is, that if any of you have read this story and feel the urge to pick up a pen or sit down at a keyboard and write either a TaiKari story or something completely different, then you should give it a go.
> 
> Thank you all once again for taking the time to read The Love We Share and I hope you enjoyed it. And a special thanks to everyone who has left me Kudos or a comment. If any of you have any questions you would like to ask me or simply want to voice your opinion on this story, then I would be thrilled to hear them and I'll get back to you as soon as I can.
> 
> Thanks once again and warmest regards  
Niaxi
> 
> P.S: To anyone who enjoyed this story and is interested, the first part of my debut novel, Ensnared, is available to read here on the archive. So, please do check it out. I'll provide the link below. 
> 
> https://archiveofourown.org/works/24587473/chapters/59386159


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